How to Talk To Your Enemies | Alicia Dunams | TEDxDanville

We live in a time of social and interpersonal conflict unprecedented since the upheavals of the 1960s-and perhaps even since the Civil War. Evolving social roles, astonishing political turmoil, the rise of “cancel culture,” and the necessity of difficult conversations leave people wondering what to say-at the workplace, in social and civic groups, and around the family dinner table.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx Alicia Dunams, a leadership keynote speaker and sought-after expert in conflict resolution, has long recognized that the persistent conflicts we struggle with are fundamentally rooted in our collective inability to communicate effectively, particularly when it comes to those we perceive as "enemies." These "enemies" can manifest in various forms, whether personal, business-related, or on the global stage. Regardless of their nature, Alicia firmly believes in the existence of solutions that provide a clear roadmap toward achieving peaceful coexistence. In her award-winning book, "How To Talk To Your Enemies: 101+ Ways to Turn Hostility into Peace," Alicia's mission is abundantly evident: to promote peacemaking in the moment for a wide-ranging audience.
Alicia Dunams wears multiple hats, not only as an award-winning author but also as a corporate leadership keynote speaker, workshop facilitator, and a certified peacemaker and mediator. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Пікірлер: 64

  • @davethompson4755
    @davethompson47552 ай бұрын

    Alicia is such a force. Loved her book as well.

  • @marisolrodriguez3150
    @marisolrodriguez31502 ай бұрын

    Fantastic talk! Politics, religion, and war have forever been divisive hot topics. In the last few years, we’ve added a pandemic and the medical response to the list of topics that are destroying relationships. Thank you for reminding us that it doesn’t have to be that way.

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your kind words, Marisol. Healing division, and turning hostile communication into peaceful dialogue, is an important skill set for current times!

  • @jennypollack3072
    @jennypollack30722 ай бұрын

    This is the message the world needs to hear right now. Alicia's book is amazing as well, I think all schools should assign it as part of their curriculum.

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your kind words. Yes, conflict resolutions should be apart of school curriculum. An important skill to have!

  • @DrSteach
    @DrSteach2 ай бұрын

    Congratulations on your talk! I love the, “Are you using one finger or two?” hook.

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Yes a handy mental tool! Are you communicating with 👆🏽 finger or ✌🏽?

  • @hazelttan
    @hazelttan2 ай бұрын

    Great talk and so true! I like to always repeat what I heard to signal that I'm listening to the other person closely and because I need to make sure I really understand the other person’s position and perspective.

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your feedback and yes active listening is an important skill to exhibit empathy!

  • @DanielBergna
    @DanielBergna2 ай бұрын

    Very eloquent presentation on productive communication, great information. Congratulations to the author!!! 👏

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your feedback. Glad you found the presentation productive. Appreciate the kind words!

  • @sylvanalevy
    @sylvanalevy2 ай бұрын

    Amazing. So many life lessons, taking notes... Thanks Alicia. Thank you!!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you so much for the kind words! Glad you were inspired by the lessons.

  • @kateeckman23
    @kateeckman232 ай бұрын

    This is a powerful talk! I appreciate you taking on this challenging, and very important topic. Thank you for your energy, passion, and presence. I can feel it!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your kind words - and yes we get to talk about challenging topics with empathy and intention!

  • @LisaRothstein
    @LisaRothstein2 ай бұрын

    Fantastic!!!!! Powerful and timely message delivered with style!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your comment ❤

  • @yorkilito
    @yorkilito2 ай бұрын

    Extremely insightful ❗

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Glad you found this valuable!

  • @lindaugelow7682
    @lindaugelow768227 күн бұрын

    What a powerful message and presentation.

  • @mintingfuture
    @mintingfuture2 ай бұрын

    Great job and such a powerful ah ha! This is advice that needs to be shared with all who endeavor to find solutions, not WAR!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your feedback - I’m glad you found the content empowering - and yes, no WAR (we are right!)

  • @iccstudy6457
    @iccstudy64572 ай бұрын

    Amazing platform for learning English

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Yes, love TEDx talks!

  • @jessicagraves3856
    @jessicagraves38562 ай бұрын

    Such a great perspective. So on point. Can’t wait to try out these awesome techniques.

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Awesome! I’m glad you found value from this communication framework!

  • @jdennis94
    @jdennis942 ай бұрын

    Great perspective and also making people aware of things we do unconsciously… I use all three fingers by the way, great message for everyone and the book is also magnificent..thank you Alicia!!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your kind words! Glad you liked the talk.

  • @officialai2063
    @officialai20632 ай бұрын

    Amazing words, my dear. Thank you Love from 🇮🇳

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    ❤ thank you for the comment!

  • @officialai2063

    @officialai2063

    2 ай бұрын

    @@AliciaDunams I love the way you spoke , bless you honey

  • @laurieperry75
    @laurieperry752 ай бұрын

    Great talk! We need more two fingers - PEACE - in this world! ✌️

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Yes! ✌🏽 and thank you 🫶🏽

  • @JeremyPollackCoach
    @JeremyPollackCoach2 ай бұрын

    Great lessons here!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your comment Jeremy and supporting me on this journey!

  • @sheetalsharma9503
    @sheetalsharma95032 ай бұрын

    Outstanding speech. How skillfully the speaker conveyed the need of dialogue and treating others with kindness as opposed to confrontation as "shame, blame, and inflame" Signs and gestures do play a significant role in communication. In the past, humans used a variety of symbols to convey messages. For example, an architect may have uncovered ancient and mediaeval civilizations by examining their statues, writings, and symbols. As a result, one should use caution when utilizing signs, use of fingers, gestures, symbols and emojis. It is usually a good idea to get the conversation going in a positive direction. 🤩😊 ✌✌

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your thoughtful feedback. Yes, Shame + Blame + Inflame does not equal positive change. Peaceful and kind interactions will get the positive results.

  • @sheetalsharma9503

    @sheetalsharma9503

    2 ай бұрын

    @@AliciaDunams ❤🤝

  • @theizzyyoung
    @theizzyyoung2 ай бұрын

    Wow! So powerful and informative

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your comment - I’m glad it inspired you!

  • @authorsunite
    @authorsunite2 ай бұрын

    Awesome!

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Appreciate your kind comment! Glad you were inspired!

  • @StorytellingSoul-mf7sv
    @StorytellingSoul-mf7sv2 ай бұрын

    Very encouraging 🎉

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your feedback - I’m glad you found encouragement!

  • @DavenAlexis
    @DavenAlexis2 ай бұрын

    I love this so much. One figure or two? What a great Q.

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thanks for the kind words. 1 finger or ✌🏽 is a great way to reflect on our communication.

  • @user-tv4bf9zh6s
    @user-tv4bf9zh6s2 ай бұрын

    excellent

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you 🙏🏾

  • @sanyikacalloway
    @sanyikacalloway2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for bringing this very important yet often emotionally charged issue into such a thoughtful and impactful message. Leaving us, as individuals with a charge and challenge do the work. You embodied a quote I value by Dr Cory Yeager, “The best hope any of us have of making an impact on the world is by influencing our immediate networks.” May your message reach far and wide while we each take responsibility instead of “waiting for the world to change.” Peace ✌🏾& Blessings 💜

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Yes, the responsibility is in our hands, and we have the ability to “transform the world - one conversation at a time” thank you for your feedback.

  • @wedseries_123
    @wedseries_1232 ай бұрын

    Your comfort zone is your enemy

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Transformation and growth happens outside of our comfort zone.

  • @wedseries_123

    @wedseries_123

    2 ай бұрын

    @@AliciaDunams yes my lady By the way where from

  • @harrypearle9781
    @harrypearle97812 ай бұрын

    CHURCHILL was famous for his "V" sign for Victory.... TNX MCH

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Yes, Winston Churchill! ✌🏽

  • @viralvasava4035
    @viralvasava40352 ай бұрын

    In India: Enemies aren't talking to eachother

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Humility is the first step, and then the courage to have these conversations. Thank you for your comment!

  • @Krassavitsa_01mng
    @Krassavitsa_01mng27 күн бұрын

    I can not see my enemies

  • @mariaantoniettamontella9173
    @mariaantoniettamontella91732 ай бұрын

    applausi

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    🎉

  • @Sanrih0e27
    @Sanrih0e272 ай бұрын

    Great talk Free palestine 💖

  • @radupopescu9977
    @radupopescu99772 ай бұрын

    Maybe ... she would like to have a conversation with the today dictators and convince them about what she said... Those who know how to do it, they do it; and they who don't know how to do it, they tell others how to do it....

  • @AliciaDunams

    @AliciaDunams

    2 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your comment. Yes, these conversations start with one step, and they are more difficult than they are easy. Grace and humility and courage is required.

  • @radupopescu9977

    @radupopescu9977

    2 ай бұрын

    @@AliciaDunams There are people that understand things through dialogue, and there are people that don't. The last kind of people understand brute force only. And this is a reality.

Келесі