THEM SAYING THEIR MOVIE WAS WATCHED 10 MILLION TIMES IS THE FUNNIEST SHIT 😭

@graphix1e

5 ай бұрын

literally insane move

@urgereturnz6540

5 ай бұрын

watched morbillion times

@nate9361

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis should get them to legally show a link to his video as proof lol

@gilded-pasta

4 ай бұрын

at first I thought they meant just 10😭

Btw, Joshua and his young ass wife announced they're having a baby. I genuinely think he should go to jail. 🤮🤮

@pastelcat879

5 ай бұрын

🤮 literally disgusting

@margaretkn12

5 ай бұрын

oh my god that poor girl and now that poor baby:( I hope they make it out of there one day

@koiifsh

5 ай бұрын

ok i know this is serious and i definitely agree with you but the phrase "joshua and his young ass wife" is so funny out of context for no reason

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me creditb

@homeland1128

5 ай бұрын

​@@ville__ who?

As someone who is 23, the idea of dating a 14 year old is absolutely unimaginable, disgusting, unhinged, and INSANE Okay he was 18 when they started dating, BUT THAT REALLY ISNT AN IMPROVEMENT 😬

@willywonka7812

4 ай бұрын

He wasn't dating her then. Only grooming her as a trusted older brother figure, presumably

@RoseWhitmore

4 ай бұрын

@@willywonka7812 ive also heard, allegedly, that he was her youth pastor and thats how they met. oh boy.

@AYVYN

4 ай бұрын

@@RoseWhitmoreYou know bro pulled the “God planned for us to meet”

@Peevee-xs4xq

4 ай бұрын

I'm fourteen and I wouldn't even date a fourteen year old 😭

@koiifsh

4 ай бұрын

​@@Peevee-xs4xqur so real for that (im also 14)

"Why can't I make friends with a 14-year old and then celebrate her 18th birthday by proposing to her? That's not weird at all! It's a perfectly normal, traditional courting practice." - people who call every LGBT+ person a groomer

@alycefrench5753

4 ай бұрын

It's called projection lol

@kalynw2490

4 ай бұрын

Every conservative accusation is a confession

@galaxyocicat5660

4 ай бұрын

@@kalynw2490 for real

@Itcouldbebunnies

4 ай бұрын

@@edba1.037 It's a classical case of grooming, dude. Make "friends" with them while they're still a child in order to shape them into your perfect little plaything, then ask them to marry you on their 18th birthday. Disgusting.

@whoareyou1464

3 ай бұрын

Oh, you know, with those types of people. The call is always coming from inside the house.

The most realistic thing in this movie is the government thinking a video of a woman talking about laws with farmers wandering aimlessly in the background would go viral.

@debdebberton

5 ай бұрын

Leslie Knope did it better

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids and has made millions of my hard work! and never has given me credit.

@mrs.samuel.L.jackson

5 ай бұрын

​@@ville__lemme fix that for you: Kurtis re-uploads my videos and makes millions off of my hard work. And has never given me credit! You illiterate-

@oldgoat381

5 ай бұрын

Followed shortly by someone from a middle of nowhere town remembering the last time a federal politician showed up

@StarSailor06

5 ай бұрын

@@ville__ sure buddy

I love that she’s offered 3 jobs in the span of a week and accepts all of them.

@Random-sk6hm

4 ай бұрын

''So we have a few positions available in our company right now, a HR manager, a marketing executive, a PR coordinator and a sales representative'' ''Great, I'll take em all'' 😃

@ville__

4 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

@soapygirl83

4 ай бұрын

And you know you can just take a government job. You know there's no hiring process or vetting process whatsoever.

@Fermin-hw5pd

4 ай бұрын

​@@soapygirl83Just like irl

honestly the old politicians being entirely confused by social media is the most realistic part of this movie

@TheNewms90

3 ай бұрын

Senator: that tik tok, can that access my home wifi?! CEO: Uhhh, yea. It needs the internet to work. A very dumbed down recreation of an actual question and the response asked by a Senator to the CEO of Tik Toc.

@AviKats66

2 ай бұрын

That and a politician being appointed to secretary of x without any prior experience or qualifications in the field.

The best thing about this movie is that the lead actress faked having insomnia on tiktok right before this movie came out and then was magically cured by god afterwards

@RoseWhitmore

4 ай бұрын

while i really dont like this people, id like to play devils advocate: being stressed, for example about a movie that you are playing the lead in that might do horribly, can affect your sleeping patterns and cause Insomnia, so it might be a bit more logical than it seems

@Emmaem111

4 ай бұрын

⁠​⁠​⁠@@RoseWhitmore Yeah, I think that’s probably what happened lol. Probably stressed from the many things filming a movie would make you stressed about, had lots of trouble sleeping because of said stress, and then finally got some sleep when the cause of the stress went away and thanked god for it instead of connecting any dots

@kalynw2490

4 ай бұрын

Also how would you know when someone fakes having insomnia? Like unless you live with someone then how would you know if they are telling the truth or not I'm not intending to start a fight just curious

@Nyx_Fey_

4 ай бұрын

​​@@kalynw2490 It's not so much that anyone knows her exact experience, but more so that insomnia isn't something that just "goes away". That's why the replies aren't denying that she was having sleep issues, simply arguing that it most likely wasn't insomnia- and was instead a case of far more common, and less chronic, stress induced sleep issues.

@davidlionheart2438

3 ай бұрын

@@kalynw2490 "Also how would you know when someone fakes having insomnia?".....If they're a Christian, easy: If words are coming out of their mouth they're lying.

Installing a secretary of agriculture that has been secretly screwing farmers is the most believable part of this movie.

@justinwatson1510

5 ай бұрын

In real life they would have appointed someone who hadn't been screwing farmers with their consent.

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me creditb

@coraorac

5 ай бұрын

@@ville__no... kurtis steals MY vids!!!

@UnchargedBattery978

5 ай бұрын

@@ville__bro kurtis is literally in the video? like i know you’re a bot or whatever but this is so stupid

@quaga

5 ай бұрын

in real life there would be a whole senate confirmation process

The director was so busy raiding the local daycare he forgot to improve his filmmaking abilities

@mistuhwhite69

5 ай бұрын

That’s not funny. He likes them younger.

@lillypar8415

5 ай бұрын

OH MY GOD

@shineinstars

5 ай бұрын

BYEE

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

@Bunny_Bill

5 ай бұрын

NAH💀

Speaking as someone who enjoys the genre, a romcom should NEVER be 2,5 hours

@Allenluvable

2 ай бұрын

Speaking as someone who doesn't enjoy them, but will watch them with friends and family who like them, 2.5 hours of a romcom would kill me lol.

@ireadfanficsforcomfortandn2534

Ай бұрын

Unless it’s a Bollywood movie-

13:11 Of course he doesn't get adult banter. He only has to be suave enough to impress 14 year olds.

@Jerome18921

2 ай бұрын

NAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ain’t no way the “finally 18” guy made a movie with LAW in the name, that’s just classic comedy

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

@billbill6094

5 ай бұрын

Unfortunately, the laws in many states may be on his side on that one. Child marriages with parent's permission are legal, and the crowd he appeals to is the type of crowd who would give their daughters hand to a "good christian man"

@livebackwards

5 ай бұрын

A Very Statutory Christmas

@shiannafoxx

5 ай бұрын

@@billbill6094 It's fucking vile. But yeah, the drag queens reading stories to kids and gay books are the ones "grooming children." Absolutely deplorable

@ABC-sz7rd

5 ай бұрын

@@billbill6094🤮

“Finally 18!” Bro was 23 grooming a 14 year old and thats actually sick.

@angelamaryquitecontrary4609

4 ай бұрын

I believe he was her 'youth pastor', or some such ghastly christian americanism. Honestly mate, I ask you.

@tranzpaprika

4 ай бұрын

@@angelamaryquitecontrary4609 that makes it so much worse holy shit

@angelamaryquitecontrary4609

4 ай бұрын

@@tranzpaprika Yes, he managed to look pastor youth. ( Past her youth - geddit?)

@tranzpaprika

4 ай бұрын

@@angelamaryquitecontrary4609 god damnit why did that actually make me laugh

@angelamaryquitecontrary4609

4 ай бұрын

@@tranzpaprika I'm so sorry, Tranz. I just couldn't resist it: call it a mum joke if necessary. I WAS going for something complex and sophisticated about Louis Pasteur, but then I thought No, can't be arsed. I was also going to attempt something special with madeleines and tisane and Proust and everything, but then I also thought No, can't be arsed. Also, no way Trump would eat a cake as small as a madeleine.

23 becoming "best friends" with a 14yr old? Straight to jail.

i’m **17** and already the idea of dating a 14-year-old is 🤢🤮

Fun fact: Mariah Carrey actually has said in one of her songs that she doesn’t like this movie. The line in question is “ I… don’t want A Law For Christmas…”

@chocolateaddictedartist5924

5 ай бұрын

🤯

@thishappenstobehere

5 ай бұрын

Big brain

@bibliobibuli_

5 ай бұрын

⁠@@laluneroihope at least a little bit of light shines for you in this holiday season 💛 you deserve it

@snakeeatingapringle0

5 ай бұрын

Kurt I’m begging you to pin this comment it’s so fucking funny

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me creditb

the idea of christian baker being a christian baker reminds me of colleen hoover’s book where her florist character is literally named lily blossom bloom 😭

@erxs

4 ай бұрын

nominative determinism

@Random-sk6hm

4 ай бұрын

My home ec teacher was called Miss Baker and used to teach us how to bake stuff

@ville__

4 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

@AshaSara

4 ай бұрын

LMAOO

@GoobyGoober-ho1ls

4 ай бұрын

Me and my friend were joke reading "Hopeless" (another colleen hoover book) and the main characters friends name is Six. Her original name was Seven but she changed it to Six because she didn't like the name Seven. I had to try so hard not to use the book as kindling

"I haven't seen real snow like this in years" said while walking through a single line of soggy diapers has to be the most hilarious scene I've ever watched. I almost spit out my coffee laughing at that. Wow. Yeah, you know I don't think I've EVER seen real snow like that.

I would love to learn about Eggnogg‘s backstory. He seems to be the most interesting guy there. How did he end up in the walls? What does he do between christmas and christmas?

@ciphergacha9100

4 ай бұрын

Eating rats and opposing Christian Baker from what Kurtis has said so far

@Xxluna_werewolfxX

Ай бұрын

I headcanon eggnog actually burrows out of the walls and only comes back to the basement when they’re looking

@The_Eevee_Breeder

24 күн бұрын

@@ciphergacha9100 mice and rats are different things. fake eggnog fan.

It's so insanely gross that their 'friendship' started when she was 14 (~ 8th grade/freshman) and he was 23 (old enough to have graduated college and potentially be living on his own). And the fact that he's so open about it without any pushback from his followers is beyond alarming

@Asm0d3u5

5 ай бұрын

Actually, there was pushback, but he locked the comments and banned all the sane people.

@stmsin

5 ай бұрын

@@babos77what is there to laugh at? its just disgusting

@billbill6094

5 ай бұрын

And of course the use of the term friendship was not to be subtle but used in the way people call their wives their best friend.

@dlaBerAuoY

5 ай бұрын

many levels of wrongness with this😭

@Pokefan8263

5 ай бұрын

Her parents failed her 😔

It's pretty funny that a Christian propaganda film has a title that could easily be mistaken if said out loud for "Allah for Christmas". Glorious.

@crunglemcbungley

5 ай бұрын

To be fair, not one person indoctrinated and white enough to appear in or enjoy a movie like this knows how to pronounce Allah correctly

@mostHumblePersonAlive

5 ай бұрын

All this time I literally thought he was saying Allah for Christmas and I was honestly so confused

@Palestinewillbefree0006

5 ай бұрын

💀

@niccolapankhurst6387

5 ай бұрын

Omg I was just thinking this!

@finalcut612

5 ай бұрын

Whatever the movie Allah for Christmas is I 100% guarantee it would be better than this movie.

The mayor actually taking the farmer's kid's presents sent me to the moon... And then I got to the part where he gives them back to the kids as if he was the who originally got them and I was shot out of the galaxy.

Idk what's worse: the fact that the producer dated a 14 year old girl and bragged about it for 4 years or that 175 people liked that picture at the time. 175 people are totally okay with this dude dating a minor. Age is just a number, jail is just a room, and age of consent laws are just words written on a piece of paper amirite?

they were dating since she was 14, ten year age gap, married at 18, and currently she is pregnant. i feel so bad for her, she seems happy but has no idea how she's been groomed and how wrong it is

@egg4666

5 ай бұрын

i guess the only thing we can hope for is that she leaves or the abuse doesn't get any worse than that;;

@xp8969

5 ай бұрын

​@@egg4666hope it doesn't get worse? Did you miss the part where he's using her body to grow his next victim??

@egg4666

5 ай бұрын

@@xp8969 no I didn’t mean to disregard that at all. Sorry.

@moniquemoen7125

4 ай бұрын

Ignorance is bliss, or some sh** like that.

@ludgersandhager2837

4 ай бұрын

Kurtis lied about the age gap it’s maximum 4-5 years

"Silly woman, you cannot be fulfilled by big city career. You want to marry in small town have baby love christmas" -most Christmas romcoms

@myriellachance

5 ай бұрын

Yours is the best comment I've read so far, and so spot on. "Silly woman. Work no make you happy. See how bitter you are because of work? Meet man to work for you. Be happy. Stay at home for man. Simple life."

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis literally re uploads my vids and has never given me any credit 😑;

@DarkShadic9632

5 ай бұрын

@@ville__zesty pop you don’t _have_ any videos 💀

@whitneygeorge6015

5 ай бұрын

it's a bot@@DarkShadic9632

@internalizedhappyness9774

3 ай бұрын

You forget about the homes in the movie that has no traces that anyone actually lives in in them because they’re sets on a movie therefore making people shameful about the status of the audiences real house!

Kurtis and Drew (and Danny) should film their own Christmas movie this year and release it next Christmas season

@IvysWhackedWonderland

2 ай бұрын

I would watch that in theaters

@balls_gaming

Ай бұрын

why is danny in brackets lmao

@kayemma443

Ай бұрын

@@balls_gaming at the time I made the comment, only kurtis and drew had both posted videos about the worst Christmas movies ever, but I wanted danny involved

eggnogg is such a cutie. its a shame kurtis and the characters in the movie don't understand him.

@pastaslut

4 ай бұрын

EGGNOGG

gotta love how the "they are making everything political" crowd literally made a christmas movie about a conservative politician

@negligible_reality

5 ай бұрын

gotta love how hypocritical conservatives are 🤗

@the-unknown-1

5 ай бұрын

because their definition of 'Political' is non-straight, non-white people.

@tacenda3250

5 ай бұрын

To be fair, you don't know if the writers of the movie are part of the "they are making everything political" crowd. Instead, they could be part of the "let's make everything political" crowd. Don't get me wrong, this movie sucks, but don't be too presumptuous.

@jamesrawlings46

5 ай бұрын

It's unfortunately impossible for something to not be political due to what has been made political. Some people are political simply by existing. I feel like it has gotten worse with social media.

@ordogordo6589

5 ай бұрын

Also to be fair, the movie is the cookie-cutter plot of big mean lady goes to caring town and learns to abandon dumb office politics (or actual politik) for cozy comfy ranch world, so it’s kind of trying to escape it?

The “I eat MICE, I eat MICE for DINNER!!!” At eggnogs first appearance was so much more guttural and convincing than most of his other skits lmao

@syds8752

4 ай бұрын

The background music also doesn’t help

@Velvetx4cove

4 ай бұрын

My first thought was wondering who left Eggnog out of the attic? 😰

@parasitophobia

4 ай бұрын

The way that “I eat MICE! I eat MICE for DINNER!!” takes me out with laughter literally every single time, it is hurting me

@Fermin-hw5pd

4 ай бұрын

The way he says "I've never seen the Sun" kills me

@kellanbellchamber6430

4 ай бұрын

God I can’t stop laughing make it stop please 😭😭😭😭

If this were ANY OTHER MOVIE made by ANY OTHER CREATOR I'd say that the timing issues of "girl wanting to go to law school and live in thr big city" and "guy not wanting to leave a small town" were just the accidental result of trying to stuff two romcom cliches into one movie but damn, Kurtis actually doing the math and showing that the ages are exactly the directors' and his vic- i mean wife's... (Tbf there's the possibility that the wife decided to go to law school years after high school, but again, that "27 and 18" lines up too well)

it's wild that the people in the movie could ship CDs internationally while being an underground rebel group in the middle of the pandemic but the producers couldnt do it in the real world

Kurtis never made a “farmer? I hardly know her!” joke and honestly it ruined my Christmas

@Swordprincess777

5 ай бұрын

Omg you're so right 😭 who IS he

@ville__

4 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

@kal_cite

4 ай бұрын

@@ville__man that sounds like a skill issue ‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥

@jinx7641

4 ай бұрын

@@ville__ good.

@CerealXperimentsLain

4 ай бұрын

@@ville__ive seen you multiple times spam trolling in youtube comments section and its such a waste of space + very cringe 😔

The fact that she was 14 when they became “best friends” is insane and he should be arrested.

@darrylwhitefeather207

4 ай бұрын

YES

@mariamimi11297

4 ай бұрын

He was 23 when the became "best friends". Why is he not in jail?!

@mikyto7313

4 ай бұрын

UnFun Fact: He is from Germany and it's pretty much legal. I'm from Europe and the age of consent is 15. No limits. You can be 68 and have a 15yo girlfriend. There was a couple on 'Wife Swap' here where the dude groomed his bride after meeting her on Facebook when she was 14. They were on Wife Swap when he was 45 and she was 17. They had kids. Completely legal mind you. Not even a big outcry followed. It was just a normal episode. If someone ever tells you Europe is some kind of a utopian heaven, they are wrong. There are so many things the US does better.

@darrylwhitefeather207

4 ай бұрын

@@mikyto7313 I'm from Germany too and I don't understand why that's legal 😢

@ih8uxo

4 ай бұрын

FRR

Mr Beast rizzing up Ice Spice while she’s twerking on a tractor while Timothee Chalamet whips a truck around a cornfield is an image I never thought I would have in my mind. Yet here we are.

The “new tractors cost more than an average home” “OK” absolutely SENT me

I love how diverse the cast is there’s so many white people

@animeotaku307

5 ай бұрын

So many shades of white!

@kosmogonii

5 ай бұрын

deck the halls with shades of pale apparently

@strawberryfox8819

5 ай бұрын

Makes sense, the Guy literally has a video explaining why Jesus would apparently vote for Afd, so we know what he votes for. And so you know, the Afd is incredibly racist, homophobic, transphobic, classist and has certified Nazis in it.

@biomefest

5 ай бұрын

hey now, there was a black guy at the beginning!

@yourwife1111

5 ай бұрын

Hey one is blonde and one has brown hair!

I’m already scared that the “SHES FINALLY 18!” dude made another movie

@mae_ra

5 ай бұрын

He even plans a series about masculinity

@FamChan123

5 ай бұрын

​@@mae_raNothing more masculine than taking advantage of teenage girls naivete to coerce them in to a baby trap marriage, right mine fellow alphas?

@amandamarinovich6164

5 ай бұрын

​@mae_ra oh geez... can't wait for Kurtis' take on that 😂

@Aurelian369_

5 ай бұрын

@@mae_ra masculinity is when you commit sex crimes

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

5:02 To address the groo-… the room I fricking love them jokes so much

TWO AND A HALF HOURS absolutely blew my mind, im here thinking we must be like 50 mins into a 90 min movie

i don’t think i’ve ever seen someone hate christmas as much as the main characters in christmas movies

@2ndperky

5 ай бұрын

bah humbug

@LadyMajolish

5 ай бұрын

Scrooge would be Jealous of Them.

@Iminsideyourwall_

5 ай бұрын

She’s not like every girl 🤪

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit

@Azurethewolf168

5 ай бұрын

@@RepentandbelieveinJesusChrist5amen

That guy who married the 18 year old is so disgusting. We need more laws protecting children

@erickmiranda3600

5 ай бұрын

No kidding 21+ or 25 with a fully developed brain and experience. Like how did anyone reason 18 being an adult??????

@strawberryfox8819

5 ай бұрын

It's something the german law is very lacking in. Here, a 14 year old can basically be with anyone older as long as it's "not forced" and their parents consent. It's a horrible law but with the majority of the government holding "christian values" (and generally aren't good people), it's hard to make them change it.

@joearnold6881

5 ай бұрын

@@erickmiranda3600no 🤦 Do the math. He was dating her when she was 14, and “finally 18” is what a pedo says when they finally don’t have to worry about getting arrested for statutory rape

@erickmiranda3600

5 ай бұрын

@@joearnold6881 talking about laws

@Theghostofme

5 ай бұрын

Maybe we should get that law for Christmas instead

This Joshua guy looks like he breaks out the acoustic guitar in the church basement every Wednesday night to see which of the youth group girls looks at him with extra longing. I do not trust this man's face.

This video has given me an idea for a screenplay; we take the usual schmaltzy formula described earlier, but instead of Finding the True meaning of Christmas and Melting Her Heart (tm) she ends up discovering the small town is an absolute hellhole of poverty, degeneracy, hypocrisy, and all forms of violence. I'm talkin Rob Zombie movie characters, loads of meth and alcoholism, wife beating, snake handling churches, beastility, incest, you name it, all while proclaiming the Glory of Jesus, ending with the main character running back to the sanity of the big city.

@whateverlolawants

4 ай бұрын

I would enjoy that. I really dislike how these sorts of movies portray city dwellers as greedy, mean, and shallow, while glorifying small town residents as a moral contrast.

@MarquisLeary34

4 ай бұрын

@@whateverlolawants And as someone born, raised ,and still in a small town, i promise we can be just as shiftless, degenerate, and shallow as any urban.

@imlosthelpc2096

4 ай бұрын

Write it

@MarquisLeary34

4 ай бұрын

@@imlosthelpc2096 Already doing so :D Hoping I can somehow convince Eric Andre to be part of it

@greatape8019

2 ай бұрын

big city businesswoman meets man in small town and convinces him to come with her instead

Let’s spread the word of Jesus🥰 but NOT to CANADA🔫😡

@ayo32

5 ай бұрын

hello random check mark that i have never seen nor heard of

@rainbowlack

5 ай бұрын

i know this guy!

@sarahbear5601

5 ай бұрын

😂😂😂

@xp8969

5 ай бұрын

​@@ayo32wtf is the checkmark for?

@likearelapse

5 ай бұрын

OT!

Kurtis is like that uncle that your family doesn’t let you hang out with

@skragboy

5 ай бұрын

Good ol’ uncle Kurt

@agustinortega5688

5 ай бұрын

Uhhh i think you mean EGGNOG

@TheSuperiorQuickscoper

5 ай бұрын

And Joshua Wesely is the radicalized MAGA cousin that your family is fine with you hanging out with some reason

@skraphashobbies

5 ай бұрын

@@agustinortega5688errrm! that was a real unicorn bacon moment! ☝️ With the sauce! /j

@shutup3790

5 ай бұрын

​@@skraphashobbiesTook the words right out my mouth 😂

Hear me out: A Christmas movie that plays out exactly like this one BUT Gloria goes into Christian’s basement and finds Eggnog a guy who has been excommunicated from the cult- I mean town. And slowly she starts to fall in love with Eggnog, they go on a little date in the basement where they both eat mice together. BUT Christian eventually finds out about they’re relationship and he decides to take away Eggnog’s privilege of coming up for Christmas this year. Anyways at the end of the movie Gloria convinces the town to rise up and take away Christian’s power, because of this revelation Eggnog is freed from the basement and Eggnog finally sees the sun, the end.

-Mommy read me a bedtime story. -Okay Honey *pulls out bible* "Happy is the one who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks." Alternatively Lot and his daughters would make a wonderful bedtime story for children.

@mischr13

4 ай бұрын

I love the one where they had to make a law to ban women from grabbing a man's balls if he started a fight with her husband lmao many Christians think the laws in the Bible were ahead of their time

Ya'll imagine Jesus coming back and seeing a shit ton of crosses everywhere and then having PTSD.

@Marmar-no6

5 ай бұрын

And then imagine being his therapist and having to sit through all of the bible lore “It’s all started in Jerusalem…” 😂

@edibleshoe8713

5 ай бұрын

@@Marmar-no6 💀

@lightofthecolossus

5 ай бұрын

I do now. Thank you.

@lucystylinson-fanaccount

5 ай бұрын

Lmfao

@hadesisbaby

5 ай бұрын

Now imagine commenting something oringal

As a farmer, I burst out laughing when I heard “modern machines save money”, some implements can help but most are way too expensive, you can tell that these people don’t know what they’re on about

@negligible_reality

5 ай бұрын

Farmer? I hardly know 'er! 🤠

@RebaMcImTired

5 ай бұрын

So many conservatives want this farmer/Amish/1600s type of “aesthetic” so badly, but don’t actually want to be that. That description probably made no sense, but I kind of hope people still know what I mean.

@crow1247

5 ай бұрын

No, no, it made sense. Thank you for that, I'ma use it now ​@@RebaMcImTired

@lacy.x0

5 ай бұрын

Im a farmer and this is nothing similar to my experience but maybe thats just because these people are americans 😂

@lizzyrank5405

5 ай бұрын

​@lacy.x0 lol no, the director just doesn't know what real farmers are.

KURTIS YOURE ONE OF MATTPATS FAVORITE KZreadRS OH MY GOD

@Aqua.o

4 ай бұрын

I JUST WATCHED THE VIDEO AND NOTICED THIS

@Oscar_Weenie

4 ай бұрын

@@Aqua.oTWAS CRAZY

@NessShrug-yq9lk

3 ай бұрын

wdym?

@balls_gaming

Ай бұрын

@@NessShrug-yq9lk in matpats goodbye internet video, he showed how a bunch of the youtubers he loves reference his "just a theory" catchphrase, and kurtis was one of them

Bro didn’t buy the blu-ray cos he’s not a dad in 2011 but bought the dvd like a dad in 2002. 💀

Joshua Wesely limited comments on his posts after people started calling him out for grooming his child bride. She also limited her comments. It’s really a damn shame that he brainwashed her so badly. Poor girl.

@natlchan

5 ай бұрын

Yo she’s pregnant now. they posted last month. so fucked up

@jordy_muhnordy

5 ай бұрын

​@@natlchanoh my God say sike right now

@vmofu7317

5 ай бұрын

Makes me sick

@Lionclam

5 ай бұрын

@@natlchan Please say sike

@thenewsilverwolf

5 ай бұрын

Can someone call CPS or the FBI or something on these people??

I’m convinced kurtis only joked about eggnog as an excuse to be naked on camera

@loonemist

5 ай бұрын

He probably wasn't naked

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis literally re uploads my vids and has never given me any credit 😑

@thj_5046

5 ай бұрын

what are you talking about. how would that even work hes legit in every single one of his videos@@ville__

@Rainbowkitty09

5 ай бұрын

You can straight up see his red shorts when Eggnog popped up again at 23:15. 😂

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

@@loonemist Kurtis literally re uploads my vids and has never given me any credit 😑

Wouldn't a better conflict have been someone digs up Gloria skimping out the farmer's funds for subway wifi?? I thought that would come back into relevance

Man can’t believe movies are still doing the whole “have you heard of this social media thing”

You and drew reviewing the worst Christmas movies humanity has ever seen is the highlight of the holiday season

@penneylane123

5 ай бұрын

Ikr

@user-ud1cd7qq4q

5 ай бұрын

Don't forget about Danny!

@Starri_Skai

5 ай бұрын

I love watching my favorite KZreadrs suffer by watching the most terrible Christmas movies 🫶

@ebonyalexis32

5 ай бұрын

This is my version of watching holiday movies every year

@connorhart7597

5 ай бұрын

Its the reason for the season. Better reason than some jewish carpenter that said some good stuff and some bad stuff LOL

This was too funny but I can’t stop thinking about how everyone around that 18 year old failed her. being friends with someone whos 14 when you’re 23 is insane!!! I cannot believe her guardians allowed that.

@lizek3515

5 ай бұрын

how much you wanna bet there's a significant age gap with her parents too lmao

@samisalsa5546

5 ай бұрын

@@lizek3515 how much you wanna bet they think drag queens are the p3dos

@NO-gh7yl

5 ай бұрын

Being FRIENDS with adults when you're a kid/pre-teen/kid is fine. It actually helps to prevent grooming when you have healthy relationship with adults when you're a minor, because it helps you recognize that the behavior is weird and go tell someone about it. But mr. "Finally 18" who PROPOSED a month later was not a friend and that girl's guardians definitely failed her. It's just sad.

@gaymiens

5 ай бұрын

⁠@@NO-gh7yl adults should be *friendly* to children, but never *friends* with them. friendship implies a dynamic of mutual support, which should never be expected of children to provide. a child should be able to go to a trusted adult for guidance and support, but adults expecting that same emotional investment from children is definitely unhealthy. an adult can be a mentor, or a teacher, or a kind neighbour, or an empathetic parent, but never a true friend to a child. (obviously when the adult and child in question are both teenagers or relatively close in age this doesn't really apply- an 18 year old can have a genuine friendship with a 16 year old. the power difference between them is basically nonexistent)

@lisarodriguez6966

5 ай бұрын

I agree. Nuances matter. So do boundaries. ​@@gaymiens

I was so confused on why that actress looked so familiar. Then I figured it out. She shared her struggles with insomnia on tik tok, and then one day she was like “oh, my insomnia’s gone. God casted out the demons that were oppressing me.” So yeah.

@HaleyTaylor

4 ай бұрын

Stop I saw this. I thought I was going insane too

Ah, yes, getting "promoted" to Secretary of Agriculture...without a Senate hearing, or confirmation, or meeting with the president, or any of the other constitutional steps necessary for the position.

The idea of naming twins Jeff and Jeffrey is killing me 😂

@Hannah-zw9ow

4 ай бұрын

One of my uncles has 4 boys and they’re all named some version of his name, John

@Kiisara18

4 ай бұрын

I was thinking the same thing! 😂

@Artisteser

4 ай бұрын

Jeff and Jeff the second

@aigroeg.24

4 ай бұрын

Jeff and Geoff

@LeachZeech

4 ай бұрын

My uncle has two sons named Ralph, but they have different middle names. Not twins unfortunately

I love that the random "fancy lemonade" is very clearly a bottle of simply lemonade from the grocery store lmao

@ByzantineDarkwraith

5 ай бұрын

Yeah, like… was the comment about him having seen the lemonade before a reference to that? Lol

@user-pt8rq7wv8v

5 ай бұрын

I mean simply's good and all but when kurtis said "her finest lemonade" I expected it to be homemade? esp bc in these xmas movies everything is always a "secret family recipe"

@blizzair

5 ай бұрын

@@ByzantineDarkwraiththat was my immediate thought lol, like it was a passive aggressive comment about how it’s a lame thing to bring to a dinner party. But considering what kind of movie this is, I’m pretty sure Kurtis had it right.

@cnew1909

5 ай бұрын

Exactly , it is hard to put it in a glass bottle?

@englishmajorloser

5 ай бұрын

@@user-pt8rq7wv8v maybe she's secretly the heiress to the simply lemonade fortune lol

kurtis’s sheer exasperation throughout this whole video is so incredibly relatable 💀💀💀 like I try to be respectful to all people (as i’m sure kurtis does as well) but to see someone else point out all the mental gymnastics that these people go through to make their “point” is SO validating 💀💀💀

The snow???😭😭😭😭 18:28

Ah, yes, let's see that "i was bffs with a 14 year old child when i was 23 and then fell in love with her exactly when she turned 18 and not a moment before" guy's take on romance, shall we?

@nothinghappens9811

5 ай бұрын

Right? I hate this guy.

@panickedshears

5 ай бұрын

Yes, the exact moment the clock struck midnight on her 18th birthday he realised he was attracted to her, and not a moment before.

@mchll7410

5 ай бұрын

he has posts of them on his Instagram from 2017 where he calls her his girlfriend she was like 15 then 🤮

@nothinghappens9811

5 ай бұрын

@@mchll7410 Sickening

@billbill6094

5 ай бұрын

Guys, when people say "you've been my best friend for x years" they are explicitly saying they've been together that long. Referring to your partner as your friend for many years is common. He was not being quiet or sneaky about the fact they were dating when she was 14, he was straight up saying they were dating when she was 14.

The cut to Gloria screaming in her car after seeing Christian hug the girl fucking killed me. Like why did she react THAT way??

@bovinityleak2066

5 ай бұрын

Cuz he didn’t leave his phone in the car for her to sneak thru it.

@jshanksffemtp

5 ай бұрын

that was unironically the best acting in the movie

maybe the lemonade looked familiar because it's the most generic lemonade brand in the world

26:30 my aunt (who is very very religious) deadass read the bible as a nighttime story to me and my brother when we were sleeping over as children 🥲

can the law for christmas be a law protecting children from joshua?

@negligible_reality

5 ай бұрын

FR!!! 😭

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me creditb

So disappointed in it not being called “Holiday hamhole hahaha”

@wannabeismyuser

5 ай бұрын

I second this

@egh__

5 ай бұрын

we should cancel him again for this

@ephemereals

5 ай бұрын

wasnt that the christmas video last year? 😭

@justagalwhocomments

5 ай бұрын

@@egh__lmaooo I remember when he got cancelled for not giving us the extra greeting and it began TRENDING 😭

@egh__

5 ай бұрын

@@justagalwhocomments that shit was so funny man

MFW MatPat watches Kurtis too :0

The groomer using Kurtis’ views to count for his movie reminds me of when Russel Hartley said that it was cool that a bigger channel reviewed him

The lack of any research going into this movie on how the government or farming works…is exactly what I expected from the dude who made 2025.

@tmartin2784

5 ай бұрын

It is hilariously wrong on how the government works, but I guess the Groomer in charge of this whole thing is German and was too busy chasing after children to glance at the wiki page for the US Gov’t.

@langleymneely

5 ай бұрын

When Kurtis said the main character was the Secretary of Agriculture for the US I did a double take! Like it’s not a difficult thing to research. No one gets a cabinet position without getting approval from the Senate.

@mushu_beardie2556

5 ай бұрын

@@langleymneely That plotline made me so mad. You don't just waltz into being 9th in line for the presidency "as a surprise." And yes, the Secretary of Agriculture is 9th in line for the presidency. And then having her do PR? That's not their job! I don't know what their job is, but it's not that! It's so lazy. Like, just have her be promoted to "head of PR for the USDA." Boom. That's probably a job. I didn't look it up, but at least it's not as obviously stupid.

@jijitters

5 ай бұрын

Her being introduced at a podium like a new COO at a shareholders' meeting was crazy. Who would the person introducing her even be? The president? Just a guy in a suit?

I feel like Christian comes off culty because the creators have no frame of reference for a popular person except for a sinister, powerful man

@negligible_reality

5 ай бұрын

that checks out honestly

@babyvia6712

5 ай бұрын

Holy shit

KURTIS PURTIS UR ONE OF MATPATS FAVOURITE KZreadRS!!!!

The plot of these movies is always: Working woman bad and mean >:( rural man make her better! Make her good, Christian wife :)))

@greatape8019

2 ай бұрын

its so common in those movies that whenever one came on tv, my mum and i would guess rhe plotpoints and what happened when and we were right 90% of timea

"Blasphemy!" "But he already blasted for you" Going to hell for laughing at that joke will be worth it.

@chmchn

5 ай бұрын

Saaaame

@aarasko

5 ай бұрын

see yall there 😭

@that_one_kayla8552

5 ай бұрын

hell is a terrible place , nothing is worth going to hell for. Jesus is the way , the truth and the life ❣️

@saintsomnia8030

5 ай бұрын

@@that_one_kayla8552 If he's gonna send me there for laughing at a joke then I don't really have much of a say in the matter.

@SammyJay107

5 ай бұрын

Cannot stop laughing at that part of the video xD

All she needed to lighten up her mood was seeing a child be sad, she’s so wholesome ❤❤❤❤

@dk0t127

5 ай бұрын

She saw a child crying and completely changed her personality without any actual character development, she has such a good heart ❤❤❤

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

kurtis reuploads my vids for the money and never has given me credit

@hannahmary6023

4 ай бұрын

@@dk0t127 sounds like my mom tbh

@Random-sk6hm

4 ай бұрын

She saw a child crying and decided to change careers and spend her entire life savings on finding the cure to cancer, she's so wholesome ❤❤❤

@elliotphoenix6765

4 ай бұрын

@@ville__ bro what

4:55 someone get my man an oscar for this insane line delivery

@takoyaki-is-tired

3 ай бұрын

okay not bad

I love how Kurtis tries to sound like a kid but he sounded like Donald Twump

when Kurtis talked about the groomer I was like, "shes probably pregnant now." and yeah. she posted one month ago that they're expecting 💀

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me credit.

@lillieblue

5 ай бұрын

​@@ville__Loser

@otakuinred

5 ай бұрын

God has abandoned us

@elizabethr.9359

5 ай бұрын

Jesus fucking Christ

@goodneighborsw

5 ай бұрын

@@ville__get a life

I think we can all agree that the best character was Eggnog.

@langleymneely

5 ай бұрын

I nearly choked to death from laughing at that!😂

@nicolaofmiddlewest159

5 ай бұрын

By "best character", do you mean just in this video, or "of all time"? Anyway, in either case, I agree with you.

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Kurtis reuploads my vids for the moneyz and never has given me creditb

@nicolaofmiddlewest159

5 ай бұрын

@ville__ No, he doesn't, you weird little man. You have one post, and it's a placeholder for boring old, regular hate speech. Kurtis didn't steal it, borrow it, look at it, or even know of its existence.

@Mookywoo

5 ай бұрын

⁠@@ville__bro you’re a bot you don’t have any content

I am 22 and bro wtf. I can't even imagine looking at a 14 year old and be like "damn, nice" 💀 EW. FUCK. BLEACH MY BRAIN

@greatape8019

2 ай бұрын

im 19 and it feels wrong to even be friends with ppl like 16-17yrs old

23:55 in the video was a perfect time to put "gods plan"

The most realistic part of this movie is the random child just confessing her parents secrets lol

18 yr old wife and 27 yr old groom? More like Child Wife and Groomer 💀.

@negligible_reality

5 ай бұрын

and you just know that he's the type of guy to falsely accuse literally every queer person ever of being groomers simply for existing and minding their business, meanwhile he's an adult man picking his girlfriend up from the local high school 💀

@FamChan123

5 ай бұрын

​@@negligible_realityHe became "friends" with her when she was fourteen. She could have been an eighth grader.

@queenofmoons720

5 ай бұрын

Hey now, it’s perfectly reasonable for a middle schooler to have a completely platonic, non exploitative relationship with someone who’s just graduated with their bachelors. It’s all in gods plan 🙏

@PotatoWaffle-sl4xf

5 ай бұрын

⁠@@queenofmoons720 of course, plus plus plus 🖕, even if there was a relationship between them at this time, it’s fine because girls mature faster than boys so basically the same level of emotional intelligence 🤷‍♀️

@aarasko

5 ай бұрын

@@queenofmoons720🤨

The blasphemy joke was S tier as hell! Made me laugh way too hard.

"The next person to address the groom- Sorry, the room" YO.

Kurtis may not be pregnant but he always delivers

@KelFromTheHitIndieGameOmori

5 ай бұрын

no he is most certainly pregnant

@realyangjj

5 ай бұрын

@@KelFromTheHitIndieGameOmori when was the announcement??? 😱

@RealKellinQuinn

5 ай бұрын

@@KelFromTheHitIndieGameOmori can’t wait for the pregnancy video!! Wishing him luck through his journey 🙏

@solocup9565

5 ай бұрын

stop reposting this stupid comment

@aoife4128

5 ай бұрын

not if i intervene

I find it funny how they make out these farmers to be these sad, altruistic people, like they're just personality traits and not actual human beings. It's almost like they don't actually know what a farmer does lmao, they don't just plant crops and sow them, they do plenty of other shit to that they don't even bother to dive into.

@jacob7922

4 ай бұрын

They were like "uuuuh what do they like in the bible belt? God and corn? Make that a 2 and a half hour movie"

@Marina-dc4bk

4 ай бұрын

Absolutely. This is more of a pro big farm movie than it is a christian movie.

@ville__

4 ай бұрын

Kurtis Conner reuploads my vids for money and has never given me any credit!😐

@KironX1

4 ай бұрын

My favorite thing about real farmers is how they always vote republican, which are the ones destroying farming lol.

@Sukii_420

4 ай бұрын

​@@ville__ whomp whomp

So what I’m hearing is they said 2025 was watched 10 million times because Kurtis video got 10 millions views…. Like “yup, they technically watched our movie because they watched a video making fun of our movie so we can count it!”

“but i do have two extra holes” is WILD

"I haven't seen real snow like this in years." While walking on beds of cotton has to be the most unintentionally funny line I've ever heard.

Eggnog is definitely the best representation of "that one sibling" Ive ever seen. Anyone with siblings knows what that means.

@cartooncrazy9883

5 ай бұрын

Oh god ive just realised im eggnog..........

@bitefesili

5 ай бұрын

​@@cartooncrazy9883you're not eggnog if you think it's you 💀 you're some wannabe "quirky crackhead" middle schooler

@ville__

5 ай бұрын

Curtis reuploads my vids for the money and never has given me credit

@jamesdean9theBlainerific9fan

5 ай бұрын

​@@ville__that's funny lol😂

@annajensen7360

5 ай бұрын

@@ville__ "Curtis" lmao

fascinated by kurtis' necklace, very arts-and-crafts core

Considering all these holiday rom coms, I want there to be one where the main character leaves home to travel to this small town... only to learn appreciation for the friends and family they do have so that they return home, content and grateful. That's never happened as far as I can tell. Also, using the non-child-friendly version of the Bible as a bedtime story would probably just give the kiddo nightmares🤣. So much violence

Hey Kurtis, you probably don’t know this but hello fresh is a TERRIBLE brand that treats their workers horribly and did a bunch of union busting (specifically through quarantine) as well as lying to its customers about the amount of waste their products produce. It just doesn’t seem like the kind of brand you’d want to promote on your channel so thought I’d leave a comment

@iwouldgiveyouthemoon_

5 ай бұрын

replying to boost this comment!

@artiseen

5 ай бұрын

Boost!

@jelly_user9982

5 ай бұрын

I thought I had heard smth about this!

@negligible_reality

5 ай бұрын

wat are u yappin bout lol

@madide3978

5 ай бұрын

boost

Bro only a Christian movie could take the concept of being kind to someone down on their luck and make it like "MAN, that was hard but I'm just SO SELFLESS for GOD that I gave those kids back their toys for FREE."

What's funny is that it sounds like he's saying "Allah for Christmas"

Making that many horrible movies and still having money is bamboozling I'm convinced it's a front for the mafia