People try to gaslight OP into thinking not wanting your GF go on a one on one date with another guy is somehow an unreasonable boundary

@FrostLordOni

16 күн бұрын

Seriously, where did he ask for advice? r/FemaleDatingStrategy?

@Stevensenegal222

14 күн бұрын

@@FrostLordOni Dude many relationship subreddits are incredibly anti-male. The sexism some times is just too much to take for me. I have seen it a million times. Redditors supporting a woman and then gas lighting and blaming a guy later in almost exactly the same situation on another post. People even make tests where they repost stories with the genders reversed and expose the bias and it's truly horrendous, but you'll never change their minds.

@matthooley6831

13 күн бұрын

@@FrostLordOni iirc (I read the actual thread) it was on r/relationship_advice They tend to get a lot of brigades from FDS and 2x What is hilarious is that there was a thread just like this one where the genders were switched and the advice was the complete opposite. 😅

@chrismccloskey2502

13 күн бұрын

​@matthooley6831 the ladies motto... good for me, hell no to ther

@Roshea

13 күн бұрын

@@FrostLordOni that's definitely the clown factory subreddit

Redditors were real clowns on this one 10:47 especially this one 😂

@druid799

17 күн бұрын

You just know they have NEVER been in a real relationship with that attitude .

@hahawoshedman4017

15 күн бұрын

When are they not?

@His_Noodly_Appendages

14 күн бұрын

A lot of 🤡s on Reddit that day.

@VRDejaVu

13 күн бұрын

​@@His_Noodly_Appendagesso... Just a normal day?

@StewBrewer84

7 күн бұрын

I honestly feel like "how often do you use reddit" should be a question on job applications

OP didnt deserve any of the gaslighting from gf and reddit. Move on brother

OP was 100% in the right. She went on a date with that dude, lied about it, and then he apologized.

@thomasprogli3372

7 күн бұрын

If I feel uneasy and my girlfriend does nothing to ease my mind then that is a red flag. Her behavior was out of the norm, that is a red flag. To many red flags for me.

She’s definitely cheating. Dinners don’t take 4 hours, but dinners and a bang or two do. Her behavior is suspicious AF. All the gaslighting from her too, it’s so obvious. And what’s with all the comments calling him controlling and insecure? That seems to be the go-to insult from women these days when they’re called out on their boundary breaking behavior. Also, I firmly believe a partner going to dinner with another person of the opposite sex while in a relationship is clearly a violation of respect and commitment. It’s one thing if it’s business related, but she’s not cheating already, she’s openly putting herself in a situation of temptation, especially knowing her partner is uncomfortable with the situation. Plus the fact she said she’d cancel and then just goes no contact with the BF and goes anyway. How can anyone say he’s insecure and controlling is beyond me. Is it controlling to want your partner to not openly go on a date with another man? Lmao. Is it insecure to have a perfectly reasonable reaction to your partners blatant disregard and disrespect of agreed upon boundaries?

@RobalLdz

16 күн бұрын

+1 bro

@dman052470

16 күн бұрын

I'd be willing to bet most of the controlling comments are women who would likely be the ones to cheat, but want to argue they should be able to do whatever and their boyfriend should just suck it up and let them. The ones that scream the loudest for freedom to talk to whoever whenever usually have something to hide and want to step out of the relationship and hide it. Just my opinion. The whole way this went down is sus and 4 hours is not just a dinner, more like dinner and a hookup. I'd bet she's even told some of her girlfriends about it, and if he wanted to take it that far, find a way to check her phone. If you feel the trust is broken to much without going that far, or, if you feel taking it that far shows it's over, then end it. If what you're doing is finding proof so no one will call you the bad guy, I can see that, but that's usually reserved for engagements and marriages. Still though, I think she cheated with that amount of time being out of contact.

@kimmogensen5390

12 күн бұрын

@@dman052470 yep thats why she was so intrested in specifically where he saw her ,, near the apartment ? or the resturant ,,, op doged a freaking cannonball

@LumemDH

5 күн бұрын

Blue Pill overdose and less than desirable(of character) women.

Yeah I dont know about some of these people ability to read and know what controlling is. 1. She gave him 2 hours notice when before it would be a couple days notice, 2. A sudden change in behavior .. sus 3. Her hanging up on him and then flooding him with texts? I dont understand this... 4. Its fine to have friends of the opposite sex as long as there are clear boundries and they know that they are in a relationship and are up front about it. 5. Her silence when he said he saw her out.. shes caught and didnt know what to say. Dude you need to leave that relationship. She doesnt respect you or your boundries.

I don't like all the comments trying to paint him as the bad guy. I might be crazy, but I don't think he did anything wrong. The gf was the one acting immature, dodging question and throwing a fit when she didn't get her way.

@jsullivan649

17 күн бұрын

Outside of the phone spam I agree, the phone spam part though… that was a little much, not entirely unwarranted but a little much all the same.

@waveexistence3512

16 күн бұрын

Exactly. The people making him out to be in the wrong are the same people who probably pull the same shady shit and think it's perfectly fine while at the same time aren't cool with their bf/gf doing it.

@dannyjr5637

14 күн бұрын

And when they tried to tell him it’s weird to mention that the gf was dating someone at the dinner. Like it’s not hard to mention that she was dating someone in a discreet way without them feeling awkward about it

@ublu3631

14 күн бұрын

@@dannyjr5637right? She could have just said something along the lines of“I have to check with OP if we have something planned on that evening I forgot, I’ll text you later“ when talking to that supposed old friend, and voila, she would have elegantly woven in that OP is still in the picture

@melaniewilson1742

12 күн бұрын

In a vacuum, him being uncomfortable with her having dinner with a friend does sort of seem off. But when you consider all of the facts, like how she asked him if he was comfortable, offered to cancel, then lied about it, and has isolated him from all of his female friends and is uncomfortable with him hanging out with other women, it becomes clear he isn't the insecure or controlling one here.

She said she would cancel the dinner with the male friend, but she didn't. She lied. She did not take her words seriously. I believe she cheated on OP. I am glad he get rid of her.

Have enough self respect to just pack her stuff and send a text about where to get it. She doesn't respect him

Im glad we all hate the reddit comments trying to make him look bad😂

4:17 to the person who said some dumb again only a woman would say some stupid like that if a guy have boundaries this as long as it’s not extreme, then respect his boundaries. This is how some women are staying single for a long time because they want to have a boatload of guy friends, and don’t see the problem but yet you’re still single.

@sproutedquinoa5179

16 күн бұрын

Yeah, I'm that guy friend - significant others are always invited, and if she won't let him see her phone b/c "you should trust me," homie can come check MY phone. This chick and her fitness instructer weren't "good friends" or else he wouldn't have to ask her out to dinner alone to "catch up." She straight up went on a date and lied about it.

She didn't just go to dinner. Dinner doesn't take a minimum of 3 hours. She cheated. She's probably been cheating the entire time. She was with him instead of visiting her brother.

She's definitely doing the dirty. She's the control freak

OP please drop her. She lied outright.

To the commenter that said he was wrong for setting that boundary, y'all need to check each other's phones NOWWWWW

Her getting protective of her phone is a dead giveaway of cheating , specially if that wasn't the case before.

As they say, when you use the silent treatment, you’re just teaching me to live without you.

@melaniewilson1742

12 күн бұрын

Silent treatment is perhaps one of the most ridiculous and childish things you can do to someone.

So many people defend the shady behaviour of the gf lol. Bunch of cheaters I guess.

@StewBrewer84

7 күн бұрын

It's reddit. Low moral standards are a prerequisite.

She is a narcissist, and she was cheating. Also, what the hell is up with those comments going after OP? They were so out of pocket that it was breathtaking.

Whats with all the comments? Lmfao If my GF lied to me about cancelling plans with a dude that i hadnt really met, just barely knew of, and quote "she didnt even really know" despite supposedly "being friends before we met" then yea relationship over 😂. Sure, dude spam called, but its his fucking girlfriend who said she WASNT going out with this guy. Itd be nice to know where she ACTUALLY WAS or at least a text or something saying she was okay just wanted space for the day to reflect or some shit. This dude fucked up to the SMALLEST degree, and shes a hypocrite who made him kick all his female friends to the curb while she gets to do whatever she wants. Fuck that. Hes not the childish one here.

Dude just seems weak . She had the power throughout the relationship. He said if they argued she would give him the silent treatment until he apologized or dropped the subject. She knew she could do what ever she wanted . I doubt he broke up with her

@ashleyyoung796

13 күн бұрын

Ikr? Absolutely weak and just wants to continue the toxic relationship like a simp.

God forbid he worry where she is after going dark for 4 hours. If you don’t want tons if calls wondering where you are, you respond. Pretty sus she never says where she was.

Whoever that comment was that said he was a controlling weirdo is either a cheating woman, or a simping man.

That back and forth between OP and a commenter calling him controlling was sort of weird. I feel like the commenter completely misunderstood what OP was saying, was reading too much into things and making wrong conclusions about his character and it felt like the person already concluded that OP was a controlling "weirdo" and did not listen to any replied he had.

At first when he set this I thought he was being unreasonable but when he started talking about her expectations….then it was something she normalised (he did as well but only because he accepted this from her) you set the same rule she did. Glad you left.

Can't stand that beta commenter how dare u get mad she lied Brooke her word went on a date that she says no to bc of risk but her it's ok

Second story commentor was trying to gaslight bro so hard 😭

Hot take: If you are insecure about something, even if you're in the wrong, you might need to split to save everyones time. It's one of the reasons when I hear, "My partner is just being insecure," is dumb.

"whether or not there was any intent to cheat", she literally went on a date with another guy, that's cheating.

OP was 10000% in the right. She was trying to monkey branch and the people scoffing OP need to shut the hell up. He trusted his gut feeling and he reflected on this trainwreck reationship and ended it. This was a one sided relationship with zero effort from her part and rules for OP that don't apply for her. Narcisstic behaviour since it was all about her and her feelings. OP need to reflect on this failed relationship,grow a shiny spine and set up cristal clear boundaries in the future and stick to them.

She cheated, you know it and she planned it in advance as her phone behavior clearly indicated. Good time for walking away

she is just a GF . Dump her . Move on .

this guy reminds me of myself from a longggggggggg time ago. Hopefully he'll learn about how most women are and not be so emotionally invested in them.

Lol 4 hours is a lonnnnnng D.inner

The only thing weird here is everyone saying your controlling... if she can't be honest, she can't be trusted...

No. She was interviewing to be the lover of the Gym Instructor. She was just telling OP beforehand -in case she was seen somewhere with him. Plus, she was a hypocrite regarding OP going out with "heterosexual friends of the opposite sex'. Good riddance. If anything, she could be fair.

This post is B's she lied about going on a date n they post some beta that lets her go on dates but said hell no in reverse

We know who wears the pants in this relationship

*If There's Any New Updates To This, Please Upload A Video With The New Updates!*

@SubRedTales

17 күн бұрын

Sure I will!

She cheated bro dump her

4:55 I don’t. She asked him if he was uncomfortable with that( that’s something weird to ask if you have no wrong intentions, unless there’s a precedent) and then proceeded to stomp all over his boundary. If his boundary was oh so “extreme”, then dumping him/her is the right thing to do, not to stomp all over his boundaries. Have respect. 5:07 sorry, but I consider one-on-one dinners with the opposite sex outside of business a date. 5:56 THERE YOU HAVE IT!!!! RULES FOR THEE BUT NOT FOR ME!!!! IF SHE THINKS/FEELS IT ISN’T OK FOR YOU TO HAVE A PRIVATE MEETING WITH AN OLD FRIEND(which I assume is a woman), THEN SHE SHOULDN’T DO IT AS WELL! These Reddit comments make me sick, he’s enforcing her own boundary and NOW it’s controlling. 6:37 it is if she doesn’t want him to do the same. 6:57 red flag, one which you have already had past GFs show to you that’s a red flag because they did the opposite. I mean, if I meet an old friend (male or female) and I have my gf/wife by my side, I’d introduce them because, I suppose, I’d be proud of having them by my side. 8:19 projection, most likely she has been cheating on you with this “friend” by then. 8:33 eh, I wouldn’t be so sure. Also “wanting to date” and “having a fwb/ wanting to f*ck” aren’t mutually inclusive. 9:26 THERE YOU F*CKING HAVE IT! The truth has been starring at your soul this whole time! 9:51 I’d have dumped her there and then. One thing is to cool-off for a few hours, a day even, but weeks for a petty argument? You can keep doing that for the rest of your life then! 10:02 boy, do I have some news for ya… 10:08 but of course she didn’t! You rewarded her every time she greatly disrespected you and let her walk all over you! Why would she change? 11:05 no, you didn’t fuck up there, you fucked up when you let her walk all over you. Also, fuck you feminist redditor(probably a woman as well). 11:23 about time someone with some sense showed up!

Yeah... no dude was in the right to not trust the girlfriend's shady actions. For all women out there hoping to be in a relationship, you don't go on dinner dates with another man while you already have one, whether you actually do something wrong or not you break a level of trust that is not easily restored, especially when you do so with a stranger, OP has every right to be concerned about what she was up to and her reaction only paints a worse picture for her.

This is why asking redditors for asvice on relationships is almost a waste of time. Some of them are the worst of the worst of humanity and have absolute disdain for any general decorum when it comes to any social relationship. These are the same people who peg their husbands or swear by polyamory and believe they have ascended to levels of "maturity" that the rest of us are too childish to comprehend. This dude was right to be pissed. His girl was 100% up to no good, and he almost got convinced by a bottom feeding redditor that he was the problem.

That's right buddy... That's how you should do to your woman... As A MAN you are the one whose held the audition event for relationship... She is nothing more but one of Paticipater for the audition.

I guarantee if the genders were swapped in this story those harpees would be like, you go queen! Trust your gut, female intuition and all that. I guess your "insecure" if you dont want your girl going on a date with other dudes.

These reddit comments are delusional. Going out to a 1on1 dinner with a dude that doesnt know your in a relationship and then gettinf offended and still going when you say no is over with bro

Don't ask relationship advice on reddit especially if u r a man 🤔 These people don't give a F about men's emotions or healthy boundaries n standard in relationship...

All the cheaters have moved to Reddit😂😂😂😂 they are defending themselves and fellow cheaters, gaslighting OPs in the comments to save their fellow cheaters and damage OPs for future generations of cheaters 🤦🏼‍♀️😂😂😂😂

Arguing with a simp who thinks op is controlling doesn’t help him.