Ohh she speaks!! Me: yeah just not to you.

@-candy-cats-9532

3 жыл бұрын

xDD

@hinatahyuga7365

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah I can relate

@RyRobio

3 жыл бұрын

Lol I relate to that heavily

@lukehart1500

3 жыл бұрын

I’ll try that when someone says that next time

@LonerStarGirl

3 жыл бұрын

Yes 👏

Being an introvert is like being judged for sitting there and minding your own business.

@Euoplocephalus2003.

10 ай бұрын

Facts!!!! Agreed 💯

@sheriasha18

6 ай бұрын

Same here!

@moulee7448

Ай бұрын

Yes yes!!!!

@itsmethehii

Ай бұрын

Really

The worst thing is when they constantly try to change u to an extrovert.. Like please stop please your gonna kill me

@miserablehuman5663

2 жыл бұрын

@Pelswad as a very shy introvert, I advice you to never force an introvert to do something that they're uncomfortable with. Never try to force him/her to be an extrovert.

@nxbxxha_1764

2 жыл бұрын

@Pelswad same 😂

@sweettoothmarie7304

2 жыл бұрын

😆

@italia689

Жыл бұрын

Doing that only made me more introverted.

Oh my god. I totally get you. I wish more people would understand that being an introvert is normal.. and be respectful

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

yes! i don't know why it's so hard for some people to understand sometimes

@st3v3n_j12

3 жыл бұрын

True true

@sarahchavez8353

3 жыл бұрын

Yes

@jackelynsanchez8447

3 жыл бұрын

My family makes fun of me for that...since they are all extroverts

@LoveMusic-dv4sl

3 жыл бұрын

I understand what your saying! It seems if your introverted/shy, people prejudge you without getting to know you. They act like something is wrong with you. You are who you are and you shouldn't have to change for anyone except yourself. I've gotten a little bit better over the years, but at times it still bothers me when people are always making comments about how quite you are even in the workplace. I do like people, but not in large groups and when I recharge, I like my alone time.

I was always the quiet kid and most of my teachers didn't like it. Once a teacher told me to speak and I did but no one heard me so she told me to repeat it louder. I did and she yelled: "She can talk!!" and made the whole class clap for me. I felt so bad that I wanted to cry..

@sramdogara8621

3 жыл бұрын

Some teachers are really mean to the students... Unfortunately

@yez9475

3 жыл бұрын

I can relate, it was just embarissing!

@jaguar1980able

3 жыл бұрын

This happened to me at school too, i answered a question the teacher asked, the whole class went 'ooooh!'. Teacher starts laughing and says 'be quiet or she'll never speak again!' I just wanted to cry. I'm 40 and it still makes me cry.

@Ilikemangotea123

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah That Happend to me too and I am going to school, so it also happen to me now sometimes🥺(sorry for Bad english)

@anxioussmurf2057

3 жыл бұрын

One of my teachers made me do a bible reading in church in front of about 100 people. I got so anxious I messed up the reading and cried on stage. I don't think teachers have a good understanding of personality types. Either that or they just don't care.

When someone ask me “why are you so quiet” then I’m done lol

@Ilikemangotea123

3 жыл бұрын

Yes same

@Pchelekk

3 жыл бұрын

answer "I don't know" works every time for me xD

@lily904

2 жыл бұрын

One time my friend asked me this and I told her that maybe she's just loud haha

@seashells1460

2 жыл бұрын

I feel like a good response could also be "because I can".

Growing up as introvert in extrovert society is really really tough.

@UnlimitlesslyFunnyDude

Жыл бұрын

extrovert are opposite of us

@daniii_BH

3 ай бұрын

even if 50% introverts and 50% extroverts it feels like we are the minority

“oh, you’re so quiet” “why are you so quiet?” are the phrases that i’ve heard the most in my life i think. i still remember how in one class the teacher made a question and nobody could answer right, i knew the answer and i wanted to raise my hand but i just couldn’t. what i had in mind was indeed the right answer. and is dumb that i still remember this because it happened years ago. i still am very quiet, but i (wanna) try to be more confident (?) also, i always find myself rehearsing what i want to say, whether it be for something simple like a phone call or something more serious like a presentation

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

yes that happened to me a lot! i know the right answer but still feel so insecure and then it turns out it was indeed the right answer

@jaedinwatson7498

3 жыл бұрын

Johana H dont forget that “ why dont you talk”

@bilalhafeez9188

3 жыл бұрын

Ya me too "why are you so quite" "why don't you talk" " she doesn't even talk" and things like that. I too rehears things what I want to say. Is what I'm saying right? , Is the sentence formed right?

@chioma2844

3 жыл бұрын

you know I am a victim of rehearsing what I say before I’ll say it ... I haven’t been in a classroom in months now so I mainly rehearse when I speak in front of family , it happens so fast and sometimes I’m not 100% aware I’m doing it and at times it gets WORSE like "I have a school presentation in front of the whole class " WORSE and sometimes (this is gonna sound so contradictory ) sometimes I don’t even practice what I’m gonna say because the practice part makes me anxious and I feel like that moment that I’m practicing is somehow displayed to everyone who will see me present ( even though it hasn’t happened yet) so I don’t practice and then I flunk the presentation ..... yes I did that once left a fat mark

@pranju27

3 жыл бұрын

Its totally my problem too

I love to be an introvert, but I used to dislike it when I was a teenager. People made fun of me because I was quiet and not talking a lot. Now I don't care anymore, if I don't want to interact I just don't do it. As you I overcame most of my shyness but I'm still shy and that's part of me :) Thanks for the video✨

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

yes! love this energy 💜

@RyRobio

3 жыл бұрын

Gotta accept it because it's amazing being introverted, but be true and be you is the best way to go😁👏🙌

I relate to this so much! Especially the part about rehearsing exactly what you're going to say and being a good listener/analytical. I was extremely shy and quiet growing up and everyone said I would grow out of it, but I haven't! I'm turning 25 in a few weeks and I'm more socially anxious than ever. I try to explain to people that even though actions like introducing yourself, making a phone call, or talking to a waitress seem easy or second-nature to them, they are incredibly difficult tasks for me. I think this is why I am so drawn to art (writing, illustration, filmmaking)-it's because I can use these mediums to communicate my ideas and feelings much more effectively than I am ever able to verbally.

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

phone calls are my worst enemy. i totally understand what you mean. i do still think people can grow out of it and change (they don't have to of course! especially if you learn to accept that that's just how you are). my mom was extremely shy, even more than me, and she told me she grew out of it when she was about 35. i couldn't believe it since to me she's always been the most friendly and outspoken person, but it is possible. that's why i think we as humans are always changing throughout our entire lives; our personalities might not be the same as they are now in 10 years time. and yes i can totally relate to being drawn to art 💜

@Akaashi_is_Superior

4 жыл бұрын

This is me, like I saw a meme that said, “ to all the people I went to school with that called me shy or quiet. I’m not shy or quiet, I just didn’t fucking like anybody!” I felt that... It’s not like I just don’t like them not knowing them, I see the way they interact with other people and how their personality is and they were all just fake. But now being in quarantine, I feel safe in my room.😊

@sultancokgezici2493

3 жыл бұрын

@@Akaashi_is_Superior I thought same way as u trought out my childhood but then I got really bored so I started activites and made new friends there

@bilalhafeez9188

3 жыл бұрын

I can also relate that im too drawn to art

@bilalhafeez9188

3 жыл бұрын

@@Akaashi_is_Superior same

I am a 6'6 Black Male, and I have been like this since elementary School. I don't know why I am quiet I watch alot, I can scan a room and find weakness and strength within that group. I don't even talk loud or seek confrontation unless I have to be aggressive. I tend to be alone alot but not in my mind it's a party. I Love me.

@frankiejesus226

3 жыл бұрын

I'm the exact same way bro

@LordDany

3 жыл бұрын

My good i have a classmate that os a copy of you he is a tower but he is very quiet I AM quiet as whell very weird on social set Ups o My good só akward hahaha

@spyda7591

3 жыл бұрын

Bro I feel you. Im a tall black man and I've been quiet most of my life lol.

@billrussell4832

2 жыл бұрын

bro are you me? you just described my life. Thanks for sharing

@resonantVoid

2 жыл бұрын

Same bro

I dont like how people keeps saying "why are u shy?" Like, its just my personality

@iiaurra1209

2 жыл бұрын

yeah, i rlly hate how im shy and quiet these days. whenever i get comfortable and talkative around people they’ll say, “i remember how you were so shy” it’s rlly annoying.

@resonantVoid

2 жыл бұрын

Like bruh bich did i chose to be like that

People make me feel so uncomfortable for being an introvert, but once you find people who accept you and how you are, you realize it's normal and okay. You dont have to answer to anyone.

Gosh life is so hard when youre an introvert. My teacher asked me for the answer in class and its been a day but i still haven’t stopped thinking about how stupid i sounded. In my head I understand but when I speak my words are all over the place. Its makes me blush, hot and my heartbeat gets louder and louder. I hate myself! I hate how the easiest tasks are hard for me.

@TheRealBlackCarrieBradshaw

3 жыл бұрын

Aww. Thank you for explaining this. I came here to learn more about introversion and your explanation really opened my eyes. It sounds like a litte bit of fear followed up by judging yourself too harshly. The fact that you actually feel so awful about public speaking really helps me to empathize more.

@abbyabbyabbyy

3 жыл бұрын

You’re not alone, I’m the same way and it’s made me feel bad so many times over the years that I can’t even count them It’s okay to not understand where we’re coming from, but I think it’s important to begin to accept it 😊 there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, we’re just all different I’m right there with you though and still learning myself how to accept myself and the way that I am

@yougotnojams6784

3 жыл бұрын

I feel my hatred for people is because my experiences as introvert

@sugadaboss5329

2 жыл бұрын

Finally someone who i can actually relate to 😄

@kgirlsupdated9327

2 жыл бұрын

this sounds like you have social anxiety, not shyness or introverted.

i always search for these kind of videos every time someone tells me “why are you so quiet” or pointing out that im quiet. i need to remind myself that there is nothing wrong with that and i am not alone 💛

@FlyingBirdSs

Жыл бұрын

There is nothing wrong with you or other introverts! It''s so sad to read all the comments here from people with the same experience of being judged for who they are. Being introvert is just a part of who we are. When extraverts tells us often: "You are always so quite" (with an undertone) it''s just a judgement, and they don't accept you for who you are. The message is in fact: You are not good (enough) the way you are. I've never heard myself saying into the faces of extraverts: "You are always so loud!" In my opinion it's disrespectful to say that. When we do that (often) i bet that they will feel judged and maybe will feel not good enough too. Being Introvert, Ambivert or Extraverts is totally fine! We must respect eachother! I am 33 years old now, and my whole life i was being judged for being an Introvert, till now. Some people just don't get it!! BUT there are alot of people who appreciate my silence, calmness, introspection....They say: "You are so calm and it calms me down", "You are so calm and you take the time to say what you want to say and that really does something to me." Being in your surrounding makes me calm and relaxed" "I want to be more quite like you" In ashrams/monasteries or people who loves self-reflection, contemplation and meditation, we introverts are greatly appreciated!! :D

@jessie1932

Жыл бұрын

Same, that's actually why I'm watching this right now

You’re the only person I know who truly understands what it means to be quiet/introverted. I used to be much more shy in high school/ middle school, and beat myself up about it as well. However, as I got into college I realized that people didn’t care what I did anymore (because I know go to a much bigger school), so I had much more space to be who I am. I am still introverted/ quiet, but I’ve stopped beating myself so much about it. I still sometimes try to avoid small talk though like taking the stairs to avoid talking to anyone. Anyway thank you for this video!! 💜

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

i feel exactly the same! 💜 i do think college helped me a lot in opening up and being less shy

Ever since I was a teenager i used to be so introverted and i noticed this in highschool people would come to me and ask me why I'm so quite. The question hurt me like a thorn i started blaming myself for being an introvert. But by time you grow used to it . I love being me.

the worst part of being the quiet kid in the classroom is whenever we had visitors and for some stupid reason these person start asking open questions to the whole class, such as "who is the most this or that?" an when the question "who is the most outspoken?" comes up the asshole bully answers with the name of the quiet kid and all classroom laugh reinforcing insecurities on the quiet kid about being quiet.

I felt every single thing that you said and totally get you. I hate myself for being a very shy introvert. People are always asking me " why are you shy?" "why can't you talk?" "Why can't you engage in this or that".... Words like that hurts me a lot. They wouldn't understand :(((( Stay strong girl. You're not alone

@ilikethoseodds.4066

Жыл бұрын

Fr. And when I finally try to say something, it turns out embarrassing as hell

@miserablehuman5663

Жыл бұрын

@@ilikethoseodds.4066 exactly. If we say something, it's stupid or embarrassing. If we don't it's awkward. :(

Pure Resonance. Sadly quiet people get bullied quite often. Trying to be normal to fit in to not be judged negatively is overwhelming

oh wow. related to everything you said. I'm 23 now but as a teenager I was horribly shy and I hated it, I hated myself. I've noticed that in the past two years i've grown a lot. I'm still introverted and I just don't have a lot to say. But i'm growing towards self-acceptance... I'm just really happy to hear you tell your story. You seem like the best type of person and I'm happy to be in the introverted club with you and so many others :)

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

yes introverted club!! 💜

@kadblue2000

4 жыл бұрын

How are you coping now though? Ive just realised all the friends ive ever had, approached me first. Now that im in college i dont know how to make new friends and I'm tired of being the weird guy even though I'm perfectly normal.

@sultancokgezici2493

3 жыл бұрын

@@kadblue2000 Spend time on library and read books, that would attract others attentions as look smarter

@icecute42424

9 ай бұрын

yes, damn I hate society, not because i'm shy I just hate

Are we the same person??? Omg I feel so seen!!! It's nice to see someone with a large audience talking about this!!!

@tahirahassan6009

3 жыл бұрын

Metooo

@arim.8614

3 жыл бұрын

Same

I STILL get criticised for being too quiet. In my job I'm supposed to be *assertive* and *strong*. But it's such a misconception that being quiet, reserved or reticent means you're not those things. We're all different. So many of us are socially anxious. You're doing great and I'm glad you feel more brave and feel like you know yourself more. i'm getting there too 💛

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

thanks christy 💜 i completely agree. being quiet or reserved doesn't mean you still don't have strong opinions and aren't confident

@nomorelisa2091

23 күн бұрын

Can I talk to u? I am working rn and my work demands me to be outgoing and talkative which I am not...from the very first day at work people realized that I am quite. And the worst part is they telling I am quite infront of a crowd..this is really eating me up...any suggestions would be appreciated

i feel a lump in my throat watching this 😭❤️

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

love u💜

In my senior year of high school, I was in a creative writing class. At the end of the semester the teacher wrote a poem for the class and every student got a line written about them. Mine was “Jason sat in silence, he had no words to waste.” He knew I had words; I completed every writing assignment. I still think about that 33 years later.

Same lol just yesterday I got picked to read something off the board and everyone jumped in their seats because I read it flawlessly since I'm the "quiet one" I find it draining to talk constantly in front of people I don't know every well. With my friends, I don't shut up lol. But growing up, people have always made me feel really bad for not being super talkative (teachers, family, etc.) People ask if I'm mad or shy and that's unbelievably rude and it makes you not want to talk to them since they're so misinformed and disrespectful. Like that's the first thing that they'll say to me, and I try to tell them how it's wrong to ask that. Then they look at me as if I am the mean one 🤣 It's really a never-ending process You should never feel bad or let anyone else make you feel bad about being an introvert, quiet or shy :) There's nothing wrong with being that way xx

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

i'm sorry you got picked on 💜 but i completely agree with your last sentence! always remember that, there's nothing wrong with being quiet

I have been quiet my entire life, and I am 61 years old now. I would not change the way I am for anything. I am not insecure or shy. I just observe a lot and do not say anything. I also have a very rich inner life, read a lot, and prefer to keep my thoughts to myself. There is nothing wrong with that.

I'm teary cuz I get this whole video 😢

@iiaurra1209

2 жыл бұрын

same

I live this out. I am a teenager and very shy/introvert. Not that I'm afraid to speak nessisary I just don't have anything to say. I'd rather lock myself in a closet then have small talk. Thank you so much for making this video. It's good to know I'm not the only one out there who struggles with this.

@resonantVoid

2 жыл бұрын

Same, you not alone

Honestly I don't know what I'm shy, introvert or anxious person. I'm feeling so down now a days when I was in school I thought I'll be more confident in college but it didn't happen now I'm going to graduate from university in few months and started my first job but I'm still the same person. I hate when ppl ask me, "why you are so quiet?" I'm really bad in communication. Honestly it's my job probation period and they want a more out spoken, confident person. Sometimes I just think the world is not for me I want to run so far away from everyone.

"I like people, I don't like to talk" That described me perfectly, I rather listen to someone speak than have to do small talk

I love quiet people :) They communicate in other ways :)

Growing up as a self-reserved/social person, has people assumed your personality because your quiet? (I had this happen to me, people would think i'm a goody-two shoes, not being aware of inapproriate things, watching certain shows/movies, etc.) Another question: Are you extroverted at times and at times introverted?

hi everyone 💜 thank you so much for sharing all of your experiences! i'm currently trying to answer and reply back to everyone. I do want to recommend a movie if you guys haven't watched it, it's Eighth Grade by Bo Burnham. I identified with the main character SO MUCH. It's about a girl who is in middle school and she is known for being the quiet one. She is trying to find her own voice and even makes little youtube videos. If you haven't watched it I really recommend it!

@tanaveesharma8289

3 жыл бұрын

Hiii.... what ar u doing now?

@st3v3n_j12

3 жыл бұрын

I know exactly what ur talking bout I know that uncomfortableness that you feel in your chest when you feel akward during little small talk that goes awkward quiet it sucks I hate it

@aspirantmaryl

3 жыл бұрын

I will watch it

@gloryjohn7538

3 жыл бұрын

You are right in all that you have said am just one of those that don't say much and I love your videos

@jelenarrr

3 жыл бұрын

I've watched many videos on being an introvert and how they(we) feel but this one is the best, i could relate to every single word you've said! As a person who has mild form of depression and huge anxiety in combination with being an introvert and shy i can say that i have the worst combination of personality and mental conditions when it comes to having to talk to people and it is really hard and exhausting. I don't hate being an introvert but i wish i could handle those small talks when needed, so i don't have to go through "why are you so quiet" questions every single time. Because when i get asked that, i become even more quiet.

This video really resonated with me. When I started college this year, I told myself that I would speak more and socialize more with people. I still find it a struggle to articulate my thoughts when in class, even though I daydream about being able to just raise my hand and speak what's on my mind. I go to a school with lots of confident people who aren't afraid to speak up, and while that may be a positive thing, it still leaves me feeling lonely because it feels like no one really understands what it's like to be this way. Funnily enough, I'm a communication arts major. Not only am I one of the quiet students in my interpersonal communication class, but I am also the person who takes the stairs to avoid having to be the silent one in an elevator full of my outgoing classmates. I want to be the person who can give a stranger a compliment, the student who can give her two cents to a class discussion, and the person who people won't be afraid to talk to. But thank goodness for the arts; painting, drawing, sculpting, and filmmaking really communicates my thoughts better than words can.

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

i feel you 💜 but don't worry and don't beat yourself up! like you said, immerse yourself in your art and through that you'll find the perfect way to communicate your feelings

I can totally relate. I’m can be socially awkward at times and by the end of the day I would be awake in the middle of the night thinking about all of the socially awkward moments in my life hahaha. I’m usually reserved and keep to myself so much that I often eat lunch at a later time just to avoid those awkward small talks in the pantry. Not to say that I hate the people I work with, they’re great people but I sometimes don’t want to have the anxiety of thinking about talking points during lunch. On the other hand, if I find myself in a conversation about something that I’m interested or passionate about, the awkwardness goes away.

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

omg same, the times i've just sat there and thought about my awkwardness lol. i wish i didn't though since it's just not worth it to spend time thinking about those things

@i.s.6165

3 жыл бұрын

Your pfp is buzz light year, kevin.

@pureone8350

3 жыл бұрын

There was this person I was interested in and decided to talk to one day. My awkwardness that day has haunted me ever since, lol.

I'm actually pretty talkative with certain people. But with others, I'm quiet. And I'm okay with it. I just hate others pointing it out all the time and seeing it as a flaw. Just the other day I got told by my boss "you're a good girl, but you're way too shy." I'm not shy, I'm just quiet with some people. Sometimes I just wanna be in my own thoughts and not talk to others. It doesn't make it a flaw smh

Thank you for normalizing being a shy person. Especially as an adult. People either treat you as a child or try to change you.

The fact that you're an introvert girl making a video for KZread makes me believe more in myself❤

I 'm also a shy introvert and I was really suffering from my shyness before 17. I always feel like a outsider in the class and people are always judging me by my personality. Now as I grow I feel like I'm more okay with it because this is who I am. I finally stopped hating myself for being shy and introvert 😊

I'd consider myself an introvert, because I become really quite when I'm with people that I'm not very close to. But I can also be an extrovert whenever I'm with my close friends and I even say jokes or is always in the spotlight when I'm with them. I guess it just depends on who I am with. I can also be extremely shy, although I will always say what I want to say especially in class or if I want to say something to someone. Whenever I'm so confident about being outspoken or showing myself in front of a crowd, I'd really get embarrassed and regretful right after. Confused- that's how I feel about my whole personality. Maybe I'm not the only one or am I?

@niaso2377

3 жыл бұрын

Wait me too ,that happened to me too 😄

At times when I'm alone, I think to myself "yeah I'm beautiful, I'm perfect, don't let other people get in the way, don't think about other people's judgement!" And then there are times when I feel like the most awkward and unwanted person on the earth...it's like my zodiac(leo) personality and MBTI(INFP) personality contradict each other. It feels like I'm both and none at the same time. And then whenever I try to speak with not so familiar people, I can feel myself quiver and hear my voice like somebody put a vibrato filter on it. It's just that face to face talk is so hard for me but I can talk perfectly well and even better while I'm texting with BASICALLY ANYONE. And we'll that was me ranting about things cause I just had a meeting with 80 members who I hadn't talked to even once but I had to say something cause they called my name but the response was so meager to what I said that I started overthinking whether they like me or not🥺

I'm a extrovert with social anxiety so I understand a lot of the things that you said I really like talking to people, but I get so nervous, is really frustanting in 2 days is my graduation, and I have to give a speech I've been practicing for a week now and I still don't feel ready last time I spoke in front of people I cried so much I was shaking a lot and I almost fainted I don't know how to just talk I think so much about it

@Brandon11746

4 жыл бұрын

I very much understand where you're coming from, because i can relate. My former congregation helped me to make myself more bold. I gave bible readings, and talks in front of the whole congregation. But i started off with just the B school, which was just a small fraction of the congregation.

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

will you have a paper that you will be reading from? try to concentrate just on the paper and in reading the words. i'm not good at public speaking but the times i've done it i've been so nervous beforehand, but find that once i'm in the moment it's not as bad as i thought in my head! just try to be positive and think to yourself that you will do AMAZING! GOOD LUCK! 💜

I’ve never heard anyone else talk about this so thank you. I’ve gotten these same questions all my life - still do and I’m 22. I never understood why it is acceptable to ask someone why they’re so quiet and yet not acceptable to ask someone why they’re so loud. I think the culture you live in has a lot to do with this topic.

I am still quiet, shy and introverted but I think i became less shy and quiet when I was given a student leader in primary school. I was confused as to why I got a student leader but I feel like the teachers wanted me to express myself more. Going into high school, I was still quiet and shy but I realised that I found friends easily and it wasn't that bad for me. But even this day, I just cannot do casual conversation but just makes me awkward and sometimes I just feel like embarrassed after the interaction. Yeah a lot of people still ask me why am I so quiet but it really depemds on who i am around. My close friends don't think i am quiet AT ALL. A teacher was once telling them how quiet I was and they were No! She is not quiet! 😂 so yeah it depends on who i am around

I entirely know how you feel. I’m incredibly introverted. So much so that I prefer to keep to myself at almost all times. I failed most of my way through school mainly due to being unable to raise a hand and ask for help as I didn’t understand anything and felt I’d just be a bother to the class and slow everyone down because of it. It can honestly become a shackle to living life and depression went hand in hand with it for me. I lost many friendships and even went through a phase of not speaking a single word to my father for 2 years out of nowhere. I had no control over it and didn’t even know why I couldn’t speak. I saw how much it hurt him but he loved me anyway. We have since repaired that instance in my life but to this day I still have no clue over what happened or why I acted that way. Long story short: Thanks for sharing your story. Always enjoy watching your vids Monika. With a smile like yours, nobody would ever think you had any struggles but everyone does and I thank you for speaking out. You are an incredible light, plus you love anime ;) keep being a star ⭐️

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

i'm glad you and your father are better now!

@kadblue2000

4 жыл бұрын

Damn dude im in a pretty similar situation. I also speak to my parents very rarely and I dont know how to reach out and make friends in college.

@Adelitafist5nb

4 жыл бұрын

​@@kadblue2000 Hey man, I spent my entire adolescence fretting over my personality. I'm still a pretty quiet person but now as I approach my 30's I somehow feel more comfortable with myself. Some things I wish I knew back when I was in college: 1. Your feelings are valid. Don't try to suppress them. They don't make you weak. They're there for a reason: they're trying to tell you something. 2. Go to therapy. You don't need to have something wrong with you to do it, and there's nothing shameful about it. It's like going to the dentist, but for your brain. It may take some time, but they'll help you understand yourself, which is an immensely important step on the path toward self-acceptance. Please make sure to find a good therapist though, since there are so many bad ones out there. 3. I wouldn't follow advice on the internet. So many people out there without credentials will tell you 'how it is' without any evidence to back up their claims. There is no substitute for therapy. 4. Please be kind to yourself. I tried to cut myself off from my emotions as a means to cope with reality. I thought I didn't need therapy and that I was just being a pussy (pardon me for the language). Little did I know that I had a traumatic childhood and that I'm actually grappling with something much bigger than just timidity. If I knew then what I know now, I think I would've been more patient with myself. It makes total sense why I am the way I am. Finally, you deserve to be kind to yourself, and you deserve to be loved. It might be hard for you to believe if you're anything like me, but you are both lovable and likable. I wish you the very best.

At my last job we used to have staff meetings where we all bought our own lunch along to eat during the meeting I was a part-time receptionist and my responsibilities were to help customers with very straightforward, mundane issues. I knew nothing about finances, administration or the future plans for the organisation. So I had very little to say at the staff meetings and this was fair enough. However, I was criticised for not saying anything. On the rare occasions when I did have something to say, my comments were dismissed or ridiculed But, if, the very next week, someone else made the exact same comment, they were treated as if it was their own wonderful idea One day I had a really good idea about something but I knew that if I put forward that idea myself it would not be heard So I asked one of the other head people to put forward that suggestions as if it were her own idea Once the idea was accepted as something wonderful she told them that it was actually my idea They didn't know what to say! Also, it didn't matter what I took for lunch, it was either too healthy or not healthy enough or they had to make some smart comment about it

thanks society for making introverts' lives hard. but as long as we say "we're introverts" instead of "I'm an introvert", I know that it's going to be fine.

I never came across my life to search for being quiet and shy and I found this video and I thought I was the only one. I can relate Sooooo much😭😭

this is true. that question is very stressful. why dont they leave us alone

I like talking to people, but my shyness is that even though I Wana say something I fear people is looking at me and even though I talk people wouldn't hear me, because I wasn't speaking loud enough. That video is really helpful. I thought I was only one like that

I am a quiet person, not because I'm shy but because I want to be more conscious about the words that I am uttering. I've learned from experience that not saying much still has more benefits than saying too much.

The few friends I make online or irl all are extroverts and that really adds on to feeling insecure about being shy and quiet. I just wonder why I just can't be like them. But I can relate to this on so many levels, thanks so much for this video 💜

Sometimes I put effort to talk in groups and end up saying someone awkward and stupid. I prefer to be quite most the time, hard to be. A good talker.

@boop5716

2 жыл бұрын

Same

This is the most relatable video I’ve ever seen I never thought someone could understand me so much

I had a lot of people be brutal towards me growing up just because I was quiet, people said they didn't like me because of it, even adults told me that. I was already insecure but it made me 10 times more insecure then I would have been. I realized a lot of those people just don't understand and im growing to like the fact that im quiet even though I've always been envious of loud, extroverted people. I appreciate the mix, not everyone can be loud and extroverted, the world would be chaos. As long as you're comfortable and secure with yourself, be whoever you want, if someone doesn't like it, that's okay, they don't have to. :)

I’m a very quiet person. I’ve always been around people who are quiet around me or social yet I still hear silence around the social group so when I do speak up well I end up talking about myself in front of people which is awkward and people will either nod ignore you or feel sorry about you. I for one have very poor communicational skills, sometimes I go to social media write my thoughts down in any video and people who like to say intelligently mean insulting things to me I regret it or feel angry about it. I do complain about my feelings way too much so people will leave and then I come across as a sensitive type. So when I observe others I pick up on the consequences of the person’s actions from the other person giving it which makes me afraid to ask a question about a topic of interest.

@dylantrott18

3 жыл бұрын

Edit: sometimes I’m in a social group

Thank you for taking the time to make this video.

I also used to think about everything I said obsessively before speaking. That's your brain being overly logical and making a natural process more difficult than it shpuld be. Its called scripting. Its very common with people with social anxiety. Its best to practice mindfulness and being in the moment and stop scripting. CBT for social anxiety teaches that.

You are a very articulate, intelligent young lady and explained yourself very well. Being an introvert is something to be proud of. There are too many people in the world who are bragging, and talking out loud about garbage and not really saying anything of value.

i hate that i always cry whenever people points out that i am so quiet. i want to love myself but those people tho. i know that im doing progress since i was in elementary school and now im in college, i kinda know how to make some conversations to people but sometimes my head is like empty and i dont have anything to say. and people who still points that out to me until TODAY, they hinders me from improving myself. they are making it like a bad thing. i badly want to change myself because of this. tbh im so quiet only in my family

Every time I come out (alive) of a short small talk session I just feel drained and wonder what the heck that useless conversation meant. I didn't feel any connection with that other person

same with me, i'm 21 and still always feeling nervous when speaking in front of public, i'm bodies getting shaking and just wanna run away quickly LOL so uncomfortable. thank you for making this video, you remind me that i'm not alone, and you're not the only one who feel that to, we are not weird :)

Being a shy and introverted teenager literally sucks. As I have gotten older and gotten out of high school it is not a problem for me that much anymore. The question "why are you so quiet" just makes me so angry because people genuinely can not understand what it's like to just not know what to say when you first meet someone.

I'm a quiet person. (Except to those i'm close to) What pisses me off is that the *same* people who ask "why are you so quiet" "You used to be energetic" are the same people who say "shut up" "you talk too much". Which is it, what do they want? God it annoys me. If you're that said person, please stop, seriously. When I talk, I feel like I say some stupid things.

Ghosh it feels like you are explaining all i feel everyday....i hate that one question'why are you quiet' I am so glad I am not alone. Its not cool to hear that everyday

I never related to any video, anyone, anything that MUCH. oh my god. loved that Video and feeling more understood now!

Being quiets nothing to be ashamed of. I'm shy but talkative in front of my friends and family

It is best to be noticed as little as possible, so being quiet seems the natural way to go. So when someone asks us to speak more it makes our fears real, besides if I knew why I was so quiet I would have fixed myself by now wouldn't I?

I can relate to you so much. I'm still a teen, and yesterday my teacher switched my seats to the back row because she thought I was too quiet so I should just sit in the back since i dont talk a lot. That felt like a slap on my face. Especially because my deskmate, said the same thing to me, "you're too quiet, you never talk to me or anyone else, if u would have talked more u could have still stayed where you can see what the teacher is writing". Then, I felt empty. I just wanted to cry. I couldn't say anything. I asked the teacher if I can still stay in the front, but she refused. Next day, which is today, my "friend" i recently made straightforwardly said that im boring. I was going to her class during my break time to talk to her and she was like "please stop coming to my class, you are rlly quiet, you dont even talk that much to me, stop hanging out with me." she said straight-up without trying to cover the fact that she was being really immature and rude and she could see the expression on my face that I was taken aback. This was just the first time, it happened many times. One time these group of girls were talking suddenly asked me "why r u so quiet?" and all i could do was smile, inside i was dieing. Another time, before my exam started all these students were talking and enjoying while i was studying and i wanted to talk to but i was too nervous and continued to read my material and one student comes up and says "why dont u talk? u should talk!", in result I got lesser marks in my exams cuz i couldnt stop thinking of that statement. I remember all the days I used to go home and cry, cover up my sadness at sschool and not tell anybody about how i feel, not even to my parents. Although I don't cry as much now like i did in my previous year, (i still do feel sad but quickly recover after i understand the situation and get support from my online friends) it still hurts like hell, but i realized thankful to all the experiences i had, I become more stronger and just didn't care about other's opinions. Even the part where my friend leaves me, it devastated me, but after re-thinking I realized i shouldn't beat myself up for it. I stopped talking to her, and during lunch break she was the one who came to me and said "hey lets hang out" and I had the courage to say "no sorry, im too quiet right?" and then she just stood there for a few secs and left. Lol, i wrote a whole paragraph on how i feel, but i've just learned to accept who I am as a person.

Love this video! I’m the same. I’m little less now that I’m older, but in school people thought I couldn’t talk.

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

thanks Lauren! me too, now that i've been out of school for years i realized it truly didn't matter what people thought about me

If I had a nickel every time I heard that, I'd be ric- well, well off with inflation. It's a slow progression for me, I feel like I get better as time goes on, better may not be the best word, I have accepted my quietness, yet I want to get better at speaking when I do want/need to speak.

I feel her :( This happened to me during pre school :( I

I tend to be shy and fear giving wrong answer or not being listened by our professor in class. I also would be so shy and fear being the centre of attention when I was a kid and would be sitting among our relatives together with my family. I feared them saying oh this girl is so cute, or y don't u eat something, and little staff like that.. and now I believe that not talking alot is a blessing because i regret many many things I said in the past to anyone, but, when u r at university it is really important to talk so as u can improve ur confidence and self esteem and that u may not sound dumb.

I am literally the quietest nursing student. It’s not like I don’t like talking I do! I’m just reserved and I overthink every little thing🙃

As someone with generalized anxiety and selective mutism who’s extremely self conscious of their voice, I relate 🥲

Once I was at the park with a friend and this popular boy came up to me and was like “ omg she talks , I swear I never heard her talk “ I was so tempted to say “ yeah I talk just not to people I don’t like “ also the reason I don’t talk is bc I feel like ima get ignored or judged or something. Ppl ask me to speak up and when I do people ignore me or don’t care. I also hate my voice so what’s the point in wasting it.

I relate. When I was in Elementary school, a long time ago, I remember there was a teacher, that taught us about values, morality, etc, everybody loved her, and indeed, she was very sweet and kind, I liked her too. But this teacher one day at the morning, when we all had a reunion for daily announcements and other things, she passed at the escenario and started to speak, saying that she’s seen a lot of students eating alone, and that she wanted everyone to cooperate and “Help” this shy people and since she was very loved, everyone started acting right away. At the time I was at 3rd grade, I was so shy, it was my second year at that school, and I’ve managed to get one friend, but she was very extroverted, and I generally just walked away for her to be with her other 9 or more friends (not a lie, I’m serious, she had that much) so I ate alone as well, and it was soooo awkward for everyone to ask you 3 times per week if you wanted to eat with them. One day, this teacher was saying this dialogue as usual, but what changed was that she added: “if they don’t want to, you don’t have to force them” and I was like: Oh thank god. The amount of people asking decreased. Something I didn’t like about it was the fact that they only started doing it when the teacher asked them to, so probably more than the 70% weren’t doing it totally genuinely, and that she didn’t make herself clear since the start, they never forced me to eat with them, but maybe some did. She should’ve said that since the start

i am so fucking sensitive i started crying while watching this lol

I can relate to that a lot ...when I am with a lot people I don't know, I don't talk to them bc I think that I annoy them and that they don't like me.. I raise my hand in class, but often have C/B grades instead of As even if I say good things bc I present myself very insecure..there is a class I don't speak at all bc I feel like they are always laughing and when the teacher just pics me to answer a question I start panicing. I even can't talk to the waiter if I need sth. one time my friends forced me to ask him for the check (to become less shy) and it took more than 1 hour.. ~quiet people have the loudest minds~Stephen Hawking

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

i relate about the grade. i always struggled with participation points. but don't worry i'm sure it'll get better as you get older! i still hate talking on the phone but i gotta do it because i can't rely on my mom or other people anymore. i now have no problem talking to waiters or even complaining about the food or something like that because i've learned that it's important to voice your opinions (in a nice way of course!). but all of that came as i got older!

I hate how most videos on KZread about introverts tell you how to STOP BEING ONE, as if it was a problem. I wanted to change this about me for the longest time and just lately realized i love this about my self and want to embrace it in all its beauty, even though it's very difficult to be understood or meet friends with similar behavior. Anyway stay strong introvert community 💪

I grew up with this! Everyone would ask me why you are so quiet - even when I tried to talk lol. From what I have learned - its caused by inhibition spirits. Monika is beautiful!

@dinoraflores664

5 ай бұрын

Yea I never understand this, even when I tried to be more talkative ppl still say I don’t talk much, ppl will still judge me about it, it’s mind boggling to me! Like what do I have to do? like it bothers ppl, especially in the work place.

Thank you so so much for this video! 💕

I have never related to something as much as this. Thanks a lot for making me believe that I'm not alone in this

I understand your pain💕 it's ok I'm also shy and introverted💛

i can relate to this ^^ thank you for sharing!

I can relate to every word you said. I hate being quiet it makes me feel so weird about myself. Once i remember my teacher saying to me "you are so quiet that your very presence cannot be felt in the class", still i didn't say anything.

thank you for this amazing video!!!

I needed this. Thank u

Beautiful video! Thanks Monika!

I love you, Monika. Thank you so much for this.

Could 100% relate to everything! You’re not alone 💕

I am so in love with this video! And i feel exactly the same! 💖

I tense up when have to engage in small talk. I literally hate cracking jokes because there are a lot of stupid people that make me feel uncomfortable and unhappy for forcing myself to be very serious and mature because it's immature to joke around? It super difficult for me because I'm from Hawaii and it's expected for locals to be friendly with everyone. Due to this expectation, I feel the need to be talkative and friendly, but doing so is exhausting for me and actually gives me really bad anxiety. So much so that I was diagnosed with having social anxiety. Plus, I have met introverts who were just nasty to me, but think they were nasty to me becuase they were projecting their insecurities onto me. Now, I have better friends and I'm in a healthy relationship, where my boyfriend actually understands what it's like to be an introvert because he's an introvert himself.

@_lilly347

3 жыл бұрын

I'm so happy for you that you have people in your life now who accept u the way u are

I really loved listening to u as it seemed like I was listening to my inner self !! U spoke out exactly everything I feel as an introvert !

yeah, I totally get you. For a long time I've been kind of stuck because I thought being quiet limited me but as the years pass I managed to understand myself more and be ok with possible changes. As you said I don't think that you are faded to be the same forever and I'm just grateful for the changes but I also respect (and appreciate) my quiet traits a lot more now. It was a really nice video!

@cinemoni

4 жыл бұрын

I feel exactly the same as you 💜

I love how genuinely you talk! It gives your vids an authentic vibe💞😁

I love your video, I can completely relate! 💜💜

Wow, never related to something more in my life. Thank you for making this video

I can relate to beating myself for being introverted. I sometimes am so quiet that I think I'm just boring. And, when people say it, even if it's a joke, it hurts so bad. I spend the rest of the day thinking about it and it really sucks.