One day, without any forewarning, Matt Mercer began spewing water from his mouth and nostrils. Marisha was alarmed and, thinking quickly, contacted the local beaver population. After the beavers arrived at their now-flooded home, Matt choked out a question - "what are you going to do to me?" Nonchalant, a beaver replied "dam you, Mercer."

@bdeterman

Жыл бұрын

"Water." -Matt Mercer, 2023

@489yugioh

Жыл бұрын

​@@bdeterman know what you mean by the way you are 😮 can you send 7:56 7:57 I have a lot of work to 😢

@genericname2747

Жыл бұрын

That joke caused me physical pain. Very funny

Ironically many who say something like "i don't understand, how can you go that long without sex?" are often those who have gone years without sex.

@kaylawoodbury2308

Жыл бұрын

I've gone 31 years without sex, it's been great.

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

The people asking that question probably wanted it but nobody volunteered.

@Nyghtking

Жыл бұрын

32 and virgin, at this point I kind of wish I didn't get the urge to wank since it's more annoying to me then anything.

@TigerW0lf

Жыл бұрын

Tell me you're a virgin without telling me you're a virgin.😂

@gregjayonnaise8314

10 ай бұрын

It’s because those types of losers have such little self value that every minute of their life in which they aren’t having sex (ie most of it) is one of utter agony, and they can’t comprehend someone having access to a sexual situation and deciding NOT to indulge in it

matt mercer, somehow simultaneously lowering and raising the bar for dms worldwide

I'm also sensing a theme with these stories: the DMs in these stories don't care whether or not the players are having fun. The first three stories all feature DMs with a "Me vs the Players" mentality, and as for that last story ... well, to put it mildly, the DM was an idiot.

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

Seems common with tabletop horror stories: the problem player only cares about their own fun over anyone else.

@Keyonne88

Жыл бұрын

@@ArcCaravan yeah honestly, the #1 thing that can ruin D&D is a selfish player/DM. It only takes one person who doesn't care if the others are having fun to ruin everything. As a DM the only things I've ever "nerfed" were wish and counterspell, but all I did was add a caveat that counterspelling a counterspell causes a wild magic surge and that wish must be acquired through a quest rather than just taken when it comes to that level, and that's just because it can get out of hand and overwhelming. The point of D&D is to have fun; it isn't a competition.

@corsaircarl9582

2 ай бұрын

@@Keyonne88 Can't these DMs just write a book or faff about with AI? Why involve people?

In today's episode, the term DM cleary stands for Douche Master.

@genericname2747

Жыл бұрын

Dumbgeon Master

Saying that critical role is responsible for ruining people’s games is so crazy to me. I get that it’s popularized the game and that people can have unreasonable expectations but honestly you just have to look at the CR cast as playing their own game, at their own table. Comparisons to other Dungeon Masters is going to crop up anywhere and it’s up to the players (and DM’s) to recognize their group is different.

@gurmyigoll3535

Жыл бұрын

Now if only others can remember this. Copying some of the good stuff is fine but don't expect your DM to be Matt Mercer levels of good, especially if you can't even raise to the same level as the rest of the cast.

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

It's not even about Critical Role, any DM could be considered better than the guy who harasses a player's character. Just a trash DM blaming a player for knowing when a game's not good.

@jaimerivera2382

Жыл бұрын

Part of the problem with the Mercer Effect is that non-TTRPG players don't understand that it's different per group. They expect it to be just like they saw on Critical Role. Granted, this issue wasn't even about Critical Role, really - it was about a lousy DM being lousy and not accepting that they're lousy.

@hyschara

Жыл бұрын

Sounds like lack of control and people pleasing syndrome 😂

@lollma0

Жыл бұрын

​@@jaimerivera2382 Critical Roll is the porn of dnd. Its super amped up, idealized and very likely not gonna be like the real deal.

Sounds like the banning everything DM really wanted for their combat encounters to destroy the PCs. I totally get the worry of, "are my combat encounters challenging enough?" but if the players feel like champs for trouncing the enemies I send their way, everyone's winning!

My DM specifically told us things he was going to try and emulate from Matt's style and to let him know how we liked it. I took that to heart as, "nice, how can I be a better player?". Some things worked, some didn't, but it didn't ruin anything and we all got better from it.

@filbergik

Жыл бұрын

"nice, how can I be a better player?" How much I wish I could hear that from any of my players...

Many of these shitty DMs seems to have very linear stories they want to run. And when the players and dice don't follow the plot they had in mind they try to force it and act out.

@Nyx685

Жыл бұрын

yep, the "just write a book" dm

@genericname2747

Жыл бұрын

I never understood that. I love writing but like..I don't want to write a whole campaign. I just write basic Plot stuff and let the players decide what happens

Watching Ace Crispy mimic sexual movements was exactly what i needed today. Thank you.

I feel the DM that kept trying to ban skills/perks/mechanics saw DnD as player vs DM and was trying his hardest to nerf the players so he could win

@shadenox8164

Жыл бұрын

Well obviously its the players fault, his encounters were flawless.

I literally just finished my weekly D & D's campaign, and I just can't understand the struggle with minmaxers. Characters are strong sometimes. Play into that. Make them feel good. Make them fight things that they would struggle against. Make them feel vulnerable. Makes him think. My Cleric just adopted 3 wolves? No big. Make them explain how they are going to take care of their needs. The Bard hasn't had a story beat in awhile? Set it up now, pay it off soon. Monk came into a lot of money? Give him a way to spend it. Players with power is never a reason to be a dick.

The DM saying the huge combat was supposed to be only 10% of the session probably meant "I was supposed to TPK yall in 2 turns, but your stupid bless made me try to kill you all night and you won you sick TPK-stopper monster." Just a theory.

I like Crispy’s on-camera skits. They get a laugh out of me and are coming at just the right frequency.

I was not ready for Azteccross's "PATCH NOOOTES~!!" at 16:38 xD

@matthewspillman7536

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, definitely had to rewind it to make sure I heard that shit right. Great add on

I don't play DnD (but I play video rpgs so can mostly follow along). The "Banning Everything" story it sounds like the DM was treating his role as a player rather than a guide, that he wanted the enemies (himself) to win and got mad when he saw he was losing ground. He took the player's abilities away so he could cheat, really. "You won't take ME down." "Mercer" sounds like a problem friend. The kind of friend that uses you and treats you badly in front of others, trying to make themselves look better. They think they can get away with it because as their 'friend', you won't mind or won't call them on it. When you do, they think *you've* let *them* down and then treat you even worse out of resentment. The Mercer excuse was just an excuse. A lame attempt to deflect from treating his friend badly, a straw man argument? It certainly did throw off the OP's point. "You're singling me out and treating my character unfairly." "What do you expect from me, Matt Mercer?" "Huh?" "The Spell that Broke Everything", another bad 'friend'. The second a 'friend' calls you out in front of everyone for doing something normal (or creative, game-wise), question their friendship. They have a problem with/no respect for YOU. The last story -- just no. Abusive. Leave immediately and give warnings about the DM to others. These "horror" stories are interesting to me psychologically. Most of these are about screwed-up people who don't think twice about making others miserable, or who go out of their way to purposefully do that. All of these stories are about self-centered people, a good number of which are narcissists and a few who sound like sociopaths. It's like 'problem players' use DnD to find victims. :/

@lordsathariel4384

8 ай бұрын

exactly this when i did my first dnd game this year after not doing any games like dnd or pathfinder in years i went warlock for this oneshot and the dm said to me since my class is abit more complex and strong early on and that my character was quite powered for the one-shot he basically said don't blast everything before anyone does anything and i all i had to do was not spam strong spells like talking with a player is always better then banning things.

Intro Story. As my daddy taught me. Never pull a weapon on some one unless you intend to use it, or you will make an already bad situation 10 times worse.

@LaughingOwlKiller

Жыл бұрын

Same, Had a weeb friend of a friend pull a katana on me thinking watching Ruroni Kenshin made him the Battosai. He pulled it on me and I got inside his stance and took it away from him and swept his leg. While he was looking up at me I told him the same.."never pull a weapon on someone unless you intend to and know how to use it...which by the way I do." Which I picked up his saya and did a perfect Chiburi and Sheath. It's both a proud and cringe memory from my youth.

"There is no way anyone can go that long without having sex with someone" what a grim way to describe his own forseeable future

I love Matt Mercer; he gave us Wildemount! ❤️ Absolutely love the campaign setting book as a DM.

Saw a vid of a dm saying critical role ruined DND and he has seen thousands of games ruined by their "ideology"

@spookythiccy4494

Жыл бұрын

@Empty Glass No idea it was a vid from a small channel that got randomly recommended to me he was a bit older and very gatekeepy based on some.of the other videos

@davidtherwhanger6795

Жыл бұрын

Ok. I'm a self confessed math nerd. Playing one session a week with a different group each week it would take just over 19 years to been in a thousand games. I refuse to believe this DM was personally involved with more than that to even know what ruined the games. And CR started about 8 years ago. If you find it again, comment and tell that idiot their a D@MN LIAR from me.

@dr3dg352

Жыл бұрын

@Empty Glass it's probably a grognard who gets all his information from Fox News and can't stand the representation in Exandria. The cast/creators being liberal likely gives him fits.

@snorpenbass4196

Жыл бұрын

@@spookythiccy4494 I'm guessing the ideology he hated was "having fun".

@5cream5

Жыл бұрын

let me guess and the " d&d lifestyle " ?

Mercer story: The rules the idiot DM wanted to run Curse of Strahd with sound like they wouldn't be fun for any campaign. That said, there is never a valid reason to treat someone like crap and trying to justify it says a lot about someone as a person. The Spell story: Ok, cutting off a person's ability to talk to most of the players in a campaign is just a D move. I'd also say it's a childish attempt to prevent the group from hearing about the DM targeting someone with crappy behavior. Ban story: I was going to say a lot here because this annoys me. However, Crispy said a lot of good points better than I can. Druid story: I take 2d8+10 psychic damage? Although, the skit helped me recover with some good rolls. The hand motions were the icing on the cake. That said, I think clicker druids would be utterly terrifying to fight. I needed a distraction from today and a good laugh. Thank you, Crispy.

@shadenox8164

Жыл бұрын

I mean it sounds like he wanted to run a different system entirely. Because 5th is not balanced around those rules like at all but there are harsher systems that are built that way on purpose.

3rd story: to try and cripple a paladin like that is disgusting. The DM needs to just deal with it.

The red flags in the intro makes the communist party look blue

@MrCrunchytime

Жыл бұрын

It went beyond red flags into "Call 911" territory. I don't know about anyone else, but if someone holds a f***ing SWORD to the throat of anyone in my house, that's when cops get involved. Hell, it doesn't even have to be my house; weapons come out, black and whites will be there faster than you can say "Just kidding".

@jerichotroy2662

Жыл бұрын

I was wracking my brain trying to find which of these stories had a communist dnd party

@redrick7369

Жыл бұрын

This is funny on so many levels...

@dr3dg352

Жыл бұрын

Da ba dee da ba di

@Izrek

Жыл бұрын

burn!

The guy in the fourth story was 1 max damage crit from banning attack rolls

When we got to the Druid one I was mentally going, "YEAAH, DRUID LORE, DRUID LOR-" and then I saw the text down in the right corner and I swear my brain just shut-down for a moment as the mental words died in my cerebral cortex.

Question....Barovia doesn't have goblins native to it. Why would Barovians hate gobbos more than let's say a Warforged or a Loxodon?

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

Because generic RPG enemies. Or because they aren't native.

@shadenox8164

Жыл бұрын

@@ArcCaravan I mean if there's any people they would probably be hostile to its tieflings what with the devil features, but even they aren't pointed out in the module as being such. So it seems weird goblins would upset them.

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

@@shadenox8164 I honestly just doubt the DM cared enough about being accurate to the module so he inserted generic distaste for goblins.

@rootfish2671

11 ай бұрын

Maybe there used to be goblins there but they killed them all

Okay, story #2: The DM complaining about bless stalling the inevitable TPK just proves how much of a jerk the DM is. They planned an inevitable TPK. There was no way for the party to win. That just not going to make it fun for anyone other than the DM. They might as well throw in an ancient dragon since the fight by design is unwinnable.

Have you considered making a Crispy plush? I'd buy one. Just throwing that out there.

Oh! Crispy's a goblin enjoyer too? Nice. Goblins are awesome.

@thenopequeen

Жыл бұрын

My goblin illusion wizard is so much fun. How dare anyone deny somebody the chance to enjoy being a goblin?

I actually went and looked up the Umbral Sight and, it’s really not that bad. Like OP said, even something like a candle, let alone a torch, or any type of light source, will counter it out. And the Paladin “nerf” is just really terrible. It’s a limited resource as is, and paladin crits are just as strong as rogue sneak attack crits. Not to mention they nerfed it beforehand since you have to call for Smite before your rolls, which was a Pathfinder 1e/Dnd 3.5 rule (and smites were honestly a bit weaker then, from my time having played alongside a paladin. I haven’t seen the paladin in action in Pathfinder since 2021).

@charnor2727

Жыл бұрын

Paladin smites in 3.x were also +charisma to hit and +paladin level to damage against evil creatures only.

@Zarlos01

Жыл бұрын

I played a couple of sessions in a friend's campaign as a guest, I made a more support-focused paladin. When I used my smite after a crit, he said that I didn't announce it before, I got confused and asked if it was a house rule that he was using. He told me that at the table he started playing their DM said that worked like that on 5e. I explained how worked and showed on the book. He then told me that his paladin was nerfed many times, and thought that DM must have something against paladins.

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

It wouldn't surprise me if that DM would nerf rogues if some big play happened with one before everyone left him.

@shadenox8164

Жыл бұрын

@@ArcCaravan I'd like to play one game with him just to watch how badly sorcerer metameric shenanigans would break him if playing paladin properly made him lose it. Not the healthiest impulse admittedly.

Honestly, something to remember, is that Matt Mercer is a scapegoat for people who are self-doubting. Matt owns everything he is and isn't and fan or not, we can all stand to learn from that. Anyone who takes away the wrong message from the success of CR forgets, that the ultimate lesson is the fact that D&D is a table full of friends that become family almost. Matt taught me the lesson of 'don't forget to love each other'. Never forget it

As a dm, my favorite part of encounters is when a player uses their abilities in creative or powerful ways. If a player came out with that Barbarian reach, I'd recommend the Sentinel feat to compliment it. That's such a cool mechanic and it would lead to really unique and fun encounters. I've left campaigns because it was clear that the DM was only having fun when players weren't, and I've had players leave because I celebrated when they won fights instead of getting discouraged. I see this as a collaborative game and I really only enjoy it when my players are enjoying it. I understand some tables are different, but it always frustrates and saddens me when DMs and players behave like they're antithetical to each other.

I’ve got an 8 hour evening shift and a new crispy video is just what I needed. Honestly these videos specifically the ones with bad DM’s have been great examples of teaching me what not to do as a first time DM running Icewind. Side note, I only just started watching critical role and am totally down with never being Matt Mercer, but I did find a single zombie miniature at my local bullmoose who’s name on the box is just Matthew.

Oh god that last story... The DM has no idea what Asexual is.. do they. It's telling. Just.. uhg, that made me feel gross as hell. I've had to bail from several games because I enjoy playing a bard, my bard is more based on card tricks and street magic but the amount of 'Lol horny bard' bullshit makes me leave because when I hear someone say it, they expect it, and I'm not playing ball with that.

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

People like that DM would be a problem for "allos" too, forcing others to do whatever makes them horny no matter how much the person objects.

@kainslegacy78618

Жыл бұрын

That scumbag was simply using their ignorance on asexuality as an excuse to dismiss other people's consent. Which is what creeps and retards do. Ignorant weirdos, regardless of how they swing, all act the same: they've got no concept of respecting other people's boundaries.

@novasiri7809

Жыл бұрын

@@ArcCaravan Yeah, what's worse is so many of these stories all stem from people not wanting to 'stir the pot' until they literally get traumatized.. It's disgusting for all folks who identify as something that isn't 's*x driven'. That DM's comment about 'How can you go so long without s*x!?' ... Easily, actually DM.. easily.

@LeapThroughTheSky

Жыл бұрын

My bard currently is a siren because we're playing an ancient Greek campaign. I decided she'd make sexual innuendo's but only because they're innuendo's about her eating and killing sailors. But not a sexual character. I'm not asexual, but honestly I'd be extremely uncomfortable in a game where everything was actually sexual. And one where my character would have to honey pot or act like that would be a solid walk away.

@genericname2747

Жыл бұрын

Yeah same. I don't want to seduce anything, I just like bards!

That 1st story was me, she never came back, tho I feel embarrassed it even happend. My next session is in an hour too. Made my day none the less to see you cover it. Thank you and stay safe players.

I to love playing a gobbo! Little sneaky bad assses.

I always keep a lookout for the fabled DM who is keeping a score of silver stars for each PK and gold stars for each TPK...

I never thought I'd be greatful for a youtube ad to cut in the moment the wild shape bit was described. It was both funny and a blessing. Also, now I crave Greek yogurt.

Today I lost my toothbrush. DAAAAMN YOU MERCER!!!!

The third story sounds like a DM who reads too much Reddit and convinces himself he can’t handle a gloomstalker, Paladin, and polearm/bugbear min-maxer. Just throw two dragons at them and enjoy the fight

Aztecross " Patch Notesssss" yell caught me off guard. Every true D2 player knows that yell

And here I was still annoyed at my first ever 3.5 dm narrating my druid was insane from being in the woods alone too long as my introduction...

"hweird" :) Crispy, you're the best.

There is a correct responce to "theres no way anyone can go that long without sex DM" You have to ask "Really? Then how did you make it this long, DM?

The PS trophy and sound effect got me good 😂

Sir, in honor of your thumbnail image. I must say that your avatar reminds me of Pate de Rolo

The purple worm bit reminds me of a session on a series of one-shots where I was playing a Battle Smith with a dog shaped steel defender, I had been swallowed by a purple worm and one of the enemies we were fighting had placed a delayed blast fireball bead on my steel defender shortly before. This is when I asked the DM if she had ever seen Air Bud, turns out it's her favourite movie, I had my steel defender flick and nose bounce the bead into the worms mouth (athletics check with proficiency bonus + enlarge) and the rest of the party wailed on the enemy until they dropped concentration, the DM ruled the damage counted for getting my character out of the purple worm and he survived through self healing and absorb elements.

Intro story be like Achievement unlocked: How did we get here?

Never thought I'd be hearing Cross yelling patch notes in regards to D&D... lol

Time to sit down and get a snack. This is gonna be crazy

The "problem player" from the first story seems like a lot of fun. It would be like having a drink Harley Quinn at your table. Sure, people might get hurt or even die IRL, but the role-playing could be worth it. The DM from the second story simply isn't trying hard enough. There are thousands of hours of videos where Matt Mercer is being Matt Mercer. Damn it man, slap on a vest and be him, too. Clearly Matt allows goblins so long as they wear the "I am obviously not a goblin" mask and leave it ambiguous as to whether or not they have eaten babies and that is awesome. Be more like Matt. The DM from the third story seemed to take things overboard, but I liked his mechanic of having to roll in every new room. It reminded me of the crappy candle from Zelda 1. Then toward the end of the game once you no longer really need it you get a better candle and a book that lets you cast fire from your wand. Then. In Zelda 2, the direct sequel, you lose all that and have to immediately find a candle again for the game to not suck so bad. The DM in the fourth story did nothing wrong. In the late 90's there was a video game called Final Fantasy VII that caused many players a type of PTSD by forcing the player to make a male hero dress up like a woman to inflate some kind of brothel. The quests to achieve this were disturbing and drawn out and it is a perfectly normal human reaction for those who were subjected to that to reenact this through TTRPGs upon college students who may not have even heard of FF7 or the strife of Strife. So sit your ass down on that chair, which is actually a tentacle mimic, be strapped in by every orifice, and enjoy the game for what it is like it's 1997.

I dunno, if i looked at a group of adventurers I'd probably leave a less threatening little goblin player as last to target unless they showed as a caster.

4:30 DM sounds like he watched too much Goblin Slayer lol

Something that is VITAL to learn as a DM: let your players be cool. Let them do cool things. Is an ability situationally OP? Cool! Good! Let the players use that ability! Why else would someone take a specific subclass or feat?

11:37 awe :( im said they lost connection with the others. homie just wanted to have a good time in dnd and was being targeted by a loser

Do you know what's bad? When a person says you are a bad DM (even when you did just one prewritten oneshot and railroaded party wh wanted to go totally oposite direction) and then sends you tons of Mercer videos saying "try to be like him" Yep, that ruins your joy

Damn you, Mercer!

"To be clear, you state you are going to Smite before you roll." Um... no. No, you don't. Divine Smite is declared *after* an attack roll hits. Is this another bullshit DM rule, or did OP just get gaslit into believing you have to declare a smite before you hit?

@ArcCaravan

Жыл бұрын

Seems like a common house rule maybe. I'm fine with declaring so long as missing doesn't expend a spell slot.

@shadenox8164

Жыл бұрын

I think some people are still struggling to adjust to the change. In previous editions you had to call things like that first.

"Bless" story: Honestly that just sounded like the DM was using D&D as a vehicle to bully that player. I know that might sound weird to some of you but I've actually had people try to use RPGs this way. If you aren't willing to just get up and leave they'll put you through all kinds of ridiculous nonsense. It can get particularly bad if the bully has the ability to make your RL life rather uncomfortable.

@rootfish2671

11 ай бұрын

I've known GM's like that who use their authority to power trip and abuse players because they get off on it. Was a lot more prevalent with older games

its one thing when everyone is on board for more adult themes in the story. its another when they arent. can it be fun to stick your character in weirder adult situations? sure, but thats when you agree and everyone is having fun with it. (my party recently had some fun with allied dragons who took on humanoid forms. it was a hilarious night. but everyone was in on it and nothing was forced. it actually started as a joke but then everyone kept running with it and it was ridiculously chaotic XD)

Yo, I just now noticed the saxophone in the background of the AITA segment. Can Crispy play the sax? :D

Matt Mercer ate my homework

@ that last story- I’m ace too and my favorite class to play is bard so you can guess how well that tends to go over with dms the first time I played a bard I was planning on him being ace. the dm paused at one point mid session to ask if I was ok with him “turning my bard into a twink” I said sure, assuming he meant ya know- a skinny gay guy, which is what I was going for anyways. Nope. the npc we were talking to proceeded to say that the town disliked my bard because someone had caught my bard *doing it with their priest* (my bard didn’t remember this because he was having magically induced memory loss) I wish I told the dm that I wasn’t comfy with that and that I was planning on my bard being ace- but I wasn’t all that good at standing up for myself at the time

Love your channel my guy

Me DMing: My cleric: smushes all the undead that I use against him Me: that's literally what playing is and it's great That guy dming: Paladin: crits Dm: >:c

Damn you Mercer!

I appreciate the humor in saying achievement but using the aesthetic and sound effect of a PlayStation trophy rather than an Xbox achievement, as well as the fact that ruining crispy's day was a platinum trophy meaning they got all of the other trophies they can

15:57 "To be clear, you state you are going to smite before you roll." If they're talking about "before rolling the attack" then that's wrong. RAW states "when you hit a creature with a melee weapon attack, you can expend one paladin spell slot to deal radiant damage to the target" (PHB page 85) which I take to mean you roll to hit and if you hit you can THEN declare you're smiting.

I love playing goblins in DnD and I LARP as a goblin in various events and go to ren fairs in my goblin cosplay. I’m gonna play goblins HARDER in spite of that guy. And blast Nekrogoblikon as much as possible.

I wanna send Treantmonk and D4 to that ban happy DM so he can learn what real optimization is like.

Oh my God, I think I played for the DM in the Banning Everything story for a one shot.

The banning everything DM wanted everyone to play as level 1 commoners

Fully agree with you that goblins are great (though generally 'any small ancestry that would look out of place as part of the Fellowship' - Goblins, Kobolds, Pathfinder's Ysoki... I'm also kind of worrying I'm a bit limited in my character concepts considering I keep going for 'small characters armed with rapiers'. I don't always play that, but... Yeah I often seem to play that or consider that...)

*Davy Jones voice* "Damn you, Matt MERCERRRRRRRR!"

Curse you Matt Mercer: I mean of they are running Curse of Strahd why TF would any NPC care about goblins? That's not even their "domain." The land shouldn't have goblins or at least seen one it forever unless they are an adventurer...

Matt Mercer caused the Titanic to sink

Random Aztecross, i have been watching way toooo much cross xD I really wasn't expecting my youtube world's to Cross that much

12:00 I totally side with the player but thete is something to be said about peace cleric + bless being too strong, particularly at lower levels, but even at higher ones.

DAMN YOU, MERCER!

23:00 - Yeah we were session 0-ing for a Blood Lords game recently (That's a Pathfinder 1-20 module set in an undead nation where you play what in any other game would be 'the bad guys') and I missed it, but someone tossed in a joke about what goes on and little juvenile humor at a few PCs being skeletons and we ALL quickly stepped in with 'yeah - we're NOT going to be exploring that kind of evil. Even the joke maker'. Thankfully - though I had a horror story on here once about that kind of situation, the folks I've joined up with now are not that sort. We're actually approaching the idea of an 'evil campaign' with a lot of caution about being sure this is "afterschool cartoon bad guys, not HBO meets slasher flick bad guys".

“Damn you, Jotaro Kujo!”

The 3td/4th story is odd. Sure, smite does a lot of damage but the DM seems to have nerfed it by making it so you have to announce it before you roll for an attack, which isn't the case, at least not in 5e.

Ah... the forbidden breathing style that should have stayed lost... Cringe Breathing...

As someone who has played dnd for 2-3 years and is playing a tiefling wizard with a background in charlatan and thus is pretending to be a bard to her party, i momentarily panicked and worried that was mine group with the slip up 😅

I have a conundrum now: I like you and don't want to annoy you, but you've shown me an achievement I have yet to unlock which ignited my completionist soul. Also, bleeping everything and making big, indecipherable gestures is always funny. By the way, where's the badass thumbnail image from?

that second to last story, i wonder if the DM had some shit teaching on how Dming works and he seems to think player deaths need to be fairly common. This might also be mixed with conspiratorial thinking and "never my fault" where if a player manages to clear something because of a class feature, its not just because he isn't omniscient and can't account for everything a player can do, no clearly the players are conspiring to fuck him over specifically and ruin his fun.

For the Peace Cleric story...not the *** hole, but I will say the Emboldened Bond + Bless combo is broken I would strongly suggest DMs require the Cleric to use it's reaction to give the the d4 from Emboldened Bond This limits the additional d4 to one character per round, so it doesn't stack with bless as much

I have posted this before but at an adventure league game in a game store had a DM freak out blaiming Critical role. cause some people at the table talk about an episode before the game. we had to sit him down and point out everyone at the table was an exspienced payer who had played with many different DMs seen many different DM styles No one was expecting a game like critical role or comparing him to Matt Merrcer. it got stranger cuase it turns out his problem with Matt was that matt dose voices and this DM did not. Had to shake my head at that cause I don't care if a DM dose voice if they do and they like it good for them but as a player I don't need that

Man a that girl opening, rare

This is an old one as far as videos go, but as a pervert who currently runs a pretty perverted campaign that is one in a sequence of successful campaigns with the same group (though it might be breaking up or changing soon due to RL stuff) I will say such things are the exception, not the rule. What's more it surprises me a bit how many D&D horror stories seem to feature stuff like this coming up seemingly spontaneously. Typically I've found most new groups are too nervous with each other for this kind of thing to come up as everyone, including the GM, is nervous about being judged or seen as weird. When you have a new player coming into a group where such things are possible, never mind ongoing, I've noticed there tends to be warnings and especially online age queries to at least be sure nothing is going to get an irate parent calling the police or whatever. I will also say, that it seems a lot of the problem players and GMs I increasingly hear about nowadays seem to pick on those with weak personalities. I had this problem when I first started as I began with the old D&D Red Box, and as a kid trying to RP with high schoolers and college students and stuff when I could find people who would play with me, I was oftentimes not treated the best, though the good experiences I did have with it meant I kept trying, and that's sort of how I wound up being the GM when the high school years came around. People who watch Stranger Things do not really get what D&D was like back then. It would be funny if they read all the articles about annoying kids in the old Dragon magazine forums (published in the magazine) where Grognards seemed to hate all the children brought in by the cartoon show and stuff. I've tried hard not to be that guy. At any rate for anyone who wants advice on how to handle the situation the druid found themself in, here is a little advice. If your not comfortable with the social dynamics or just want to avoid saying 'no' until you get your bearings, just remember the whole situation is about seduction and putting them off balance. Remind the GM of that and when they go to get busy ask what their AC is with half their armor off and tell them your ready for initiative or whatever and your entire motive was to get them alone to try and take them out of the picture or whatever, which is not an unrealistic take on how these things go. To put this into perspective while it was an entirely different situation I was doing some ad-lib mostly systemless Star Wars RP where my character was a female bounty hunter freelancing on a black ops mission. She needed to get some plans off a target in a bar, so she did the seduction thing by grabbing a couple of beers from the waiter, dumping some laxitives from a harsh environment med kit into one of the drinks, and then sitting down to fangirl over the guy who was a space pirate. The basic trick was if he drank the beer she'd keep him talking until the drugs worked, and then follow him into the bathroom and take him down on the can away from the crowd. If the "seduction" thing worked she'd "take him back to her place" via the back door and then shank him in the alleyway. If the guy got uppity and didn't respond that way and got offended or whatever, she'd just gun him down and make it look like a bar dispute over that kind of thing. Either way she'd get what's in his pockets without it being identified as an intel op and it would seem like sleazy violence at the star port. Typically this sort of thing is to lure someone or get into someplace, it's not about sex, and if the GM forgets that, well.... the AC is easier to hit when their pants are down, and they likely won't forget again. I actually had a premeditated character set up for this at one point. Me and a girl I knew (she was dating someone else in the group) came up with the idea of making a pair of twin sisters from Kara Tur (her boyfriend who was a good friend of mine was playing a Genie based mage called a Shi'ar in what was turning into a very exotic game for FR). They were both really exotic half-elves doing murder for hire in Waterdeep and the GM was using alternative die rolling and for lulz let us roll twice and dupe the best attributes on our sheets because we were twins. My character was a Spell Filtcher, and she was some kind of Ninja-Mage from the 2E Ninja Handbook. We took some combined attack NWPs too in order to work as a team and set up backstabs for each other. At any rate despite being a good/neutral campaign (we were on the neutral side) our first job given that it started at like 7th level was for none other than Lord Fzoul who is one of the major NPCs of the setting, and unsurprisingly he set us up. The thing is due to some scouting we bypassed his double cross and got away with the item we were supposed to recover, but were upset, so we came up with the plan of trying to whack the guy (much to the annoyance of the GM) who had been making eyes at us in the intro RP. So we basically came back with what he wanted to pretend we wanted to get paid, and flirted with him, as many people write him as a perv. That went out long enough to get him away from his bodyguards and perform a coordinated backstab in an edition where that does damage multiples as soon as he took his shirt off (he didn't know we knew he had tried to betray us, that was part of the deception) not to mention the ridiculous poison the GM let us have. He of course came back due to his pre-set contingencies (thus it was not world busting) but it was kind of funny given the "oh no" factor of the whole thing. I for some reason thought of it because it was kind of the opposite of what happened there, where we kind of pushed it on the GM with the express intent of murdering an NPC that he knew would likely fall for it. :)

Damn, you Mercer.

Smites are how paladins scale damage, smites are how a paladin compares to fighters throwing out three attacks plus whatever subclass feature they're using to supplement themselves and smites scaling with spell slots are how that keeps up. I think the problem with that campaign is that the DM wanted to create difficult encounters by relying on unique tactical situations that convinced every player he was this hardcore wargaming tactician, but instead he ended up creating difficult encounters relying on unique tactical situations that uniformly let every player shine in their own special way. Stories like that last one remind of the Jean Claude Van Dam cinematic masterpiece Street Fighter. Based loosely on characters, but not the story, of the platform fighting game franchise of the same name, Street Fighter subverted the uncomfortable villain's lair sexual assault scene by doing these three simple things. First, while it established the villains intentions to clearly be the sexual victimization of the female character, it avoided having an actual sexual assault while still building on that villains ongoing themes of ruthlessness and grandiose arrogance, it also included the best villain line of that movie. Second it placed the female character in that scene by her own choice, it's made very clear that this was her plan, and now he was trapped alone in the room with her. Third, and most importantly, it was a vehicle to establish the physical prowess, strength and skills of that female character, in essence, it heightened her as a hero and did not reduce her to a victim. More DM's could learn from the goofy fun of the Street Fighter movie. I feel like the DM who ran that campaign did a pretty good job.

I'm going to play a druid! *Rusty Cage enters the chat*

22:30 💀 I'm dead

Damn you, Mercer… *damn you!*

I just want to say that I don't know Matthew Mercer that well, I mean none of us do and from my understanding, he seems like a cool dude. I bet if he heard this, he'd probably be like any normal person would say: "Don't worry about being me, be yourself." Am I wrong?

Ayo did this guy just jump the story? I think it literally scared me

Damn you, Mercer!!!

damn you Mercer 😂

fellas, is it min-maxxing to be a paladin?