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@stardustmonkey4302

3 жыл бұрын

R a i d

@cheese790

3 жыл бұрын

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

@samuelthehobo4441

3 жыл бұрын

Raid Shadow Leggings

@smeckledeckle6573

3 жыл бұрын

No, i don't think i will.

@Tallmonster2

3 жыл бұрын

No

Steven Seagal knows karate, aikido, taek wondo, jiu jitsu and many other dangerous words.

@hollow8194

3 жыл бұрын

"So how did you learn aikido?" *I started learning karate at a young age* I would actually love to see this dude having his mask broken. I want to see what he really is like but it feels like he's acting all the time

@obamabinladen7234

3 жыл бұрын

@@hollow8194 He probably learnt karate at a McDojo

@masterspongebat2387

3 жыл бұрын

😅😅😅

@himdotcom

3 жыл бұрын

😂 You won.

@alfredthegreatkingofwessex6838

3 жыл бұрын

Hahahaha

He's basically that kid in middle school who took one karate lesson and became an expert on the art of war, except he's been doing it his whole life, and everyone just rolls with it for some reason.

@thenumber102k

3 жыл бұрын

This man has probably been to mars and back because there were no dojos

@stupidpremades1447

3 жыл бұрын

because he has money

@adude4491

3 жыл бұрын

Nah man this guy has been debunked a long time ago. Everyone knows he’s a fraud

@america8706

3 жыл бұрын

We just wanna know what he's gonna do next.

@mistermatix8241

3 жыл бұрын

Yes that is so true, he is that kid

There are some things Seagal hasn't done yet: A)Stay in shape. B)Make a good movie. C)Keep it real.

@GregoryAlanBaileygamereviews

Ай бұрын

Steven Seagal knows karate, aikido, taek wondo, jiu jitsu and many other dangerous words.

@what1111

11 күн бұрын

D) Fight for real/take a punch or hit.

@WhatIsMatter101

10 күн бұрын

E)Have a scene where theres no overly dramatic lighting on his face even though the scene is well lit.

@GriffinBaillio

8 сағат бұрын

F) Make a movie that fits his body type.

“You’re here to shoot the child, but only the child with the weapon” Never fails to crack me up 😂

@MinscFromBaldursGate92

6 ай бұрын

''Don't make me do this!''

@tinobemellow

5 ай бұрын

Out of all the hilarious things in this video, it had to be the statement about shooting a kid.

@GregoryAlanBaileygamereviews

Ай бұрын

Steven Seagal knows karate, aikido, taek wondo, jiu jitsu and many other dangerous words.

@raiden1766

Ай бұрын

@@MinscFromBaldursGate92 You boy of 12, with the shotgun, unhand your weapon! (slides down aggressively)

I bet Seagal will see this. He seems like the type of guy to Google himself pretty often.

@jokerhere4504

3 жыл бұрын

Apparently that isn’t too far off

@skull-chan7703

3 жыл бұрын

Weren’t he one of those guys that couldn’t handle people making fun of him in the past? not like Tom Cruise level but still pretty sensitive.

@CircumcisionIsChildAbuse

3 жыл бұрын

his mannerisms reminds me A LOT of Trump....super full of himself and not very bright.

@Gogglesofkrome

3 жыл бұрын

@Chef_Hogan Your intuition is not far off the mark

@saltyspitoon5089

3 жыл бұрын

Skull-chan yeah, there’s a story on KZread with an actor (I can’t remember his name at the moment). But the sum of it is, he laughed at Steven trying to be a hard ass and Steven hit him against a wall. You can find the story it’s not hard to find at all

He genuinely looks like a custom character in a cutscene when he's with putin

@therebel7865

3 жыл бұрын

All I have to say is 12:49

@EbolaSquirrel

3 жыл бұрын

Spy

@nrtouge

3 жыл бұрын

Helo spy teeftoo

@therebel7865

3 жыл бұрын

@@nrtouge SPAH SAPING MA SENTRY

@krysmrug6478

3 жыл бұрын

He looks like a skin i downloaded for gta san andreas from gamebanana when i was a kid

I’m really questioning whether or not Seagal is really good at lying or if he actually believes his own bullshit.

@pvt.prinny759

Жыл бұрын

Definetly not self- aware atleast

@daviddamasceno6063

Жыл бұрын

Yes

@benitoswagolini3410

11 ай бұрын

He's lied so many times that he believes his own lies

@mrcritical6751

11 ай бұрын

He’s insecure about looking weak because he got bullied as a kid and has asthma apparently

@2thomask

9 ай бұрын

hes in too deep

Seagall's coke nail killed me. Even funnier with the snorts he kept making during the interview because the bump he took. Dude probably thinks he has tigers blood

@Dovah21

6 ай бұрын

I was just browsing the comment section hoping that somebody else had pointed this out 😆

@jamesrosewell9081

5 ай бұрын

Coke nail?

@michaelskipper3375

5 ай бұрын

@jamesrosewell9081 it is a fingernail that some people that snort nose suger grow out so that they just scoop it with the nail and snort it. You can pick it up when it is just one long fingernail

@retropocalypse1984

5 ай бұрын

He has been growing that coke nail since Under Siege

@GregoryAlanBaileygamereviews

Ай бұрын

Steven Seagal knows karate, aikido, taek wondo, jiu jitsu and many other dangerous words.

Jon, blink twice if Raid: Shadow Legends has your family.

@kfconsoleenthusiast4992

3 жыл бұрын

Me:blinks twice

@SoftDistorsions

3 жыл бұрын

Sam U oh god I was thinking the exact same thing. WE NEED TO HELP JON! Aaaaahhhh

@mr.burnsgaming8985

3 жыл бұрын

4

@calebkujawa2324

3 жыл бұрын

John needs our help

@patrickbasedman5255

3 жыл бұрын

The games shit dude but still a man has gotta do something to get money.

He's like that kid in school who has kept lying his way throughout the whole year but since he's too far in now he can't back out

@bunbunette

3 жыл бұрын

Legit kept thinking "it's like a mom's basement dweller kid found how to bullshit his way into Hollywood because he's the edgiest guy out there"

@Ails1234

3 жыл бұрын

Are you saying Steven Seagal is going to run for president?

@animewoobovo5964

3 жыл бұрын

@@Ails1234 yes exactly

@boodledemic6430

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds like democrat politicians lol

@rafaelleone678

3 жыл бұрын

"look at the way he cleans those dishes. Dude!"

Nobody makes fun of Steven Seagal better than Steven Seagal.

Bruhhh that sheriff pounding his fingers on the table had me dying😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Steven Seagal the type of guy who has a girlfriend at a different school.

@megavidaeos

3 жыл бұрын

A really really hot one, according to him.

@juanokug4

3 жыл бұрын

@@megavidaeos we haven't seen any pictures yet, but i trust him, he seems pretty happy with the relationship

@OakNuggins

3 жыл бұрын

Couldnt have said it better.

@guprh7481

3 жыл бұрын

Terrifyingly accurate

@TimThomason

3 жыл бұрын

Correct. I met up with him just last week, and he told me all about his new girlfriend at the local high school.

Jon’s been real silent since he talked smack about Steven

@MegaBalea123

3 жыл бұрын

True

@whitelight7

3 жыл бұрын

O no

@hypernova8234

3 жыл бұрын

OH DAMMMM

@some-hampter220

3 жыл бұрын

*he's come for him*

@Dovaz921

3 жыл бұрын

Zoo race waa his last good video

He "doesnt think jean claude is a martial artist" meanwhile jean claude is an actual certified black belt, fought on the Belgian karate team and won the European professional karate associations middleweight title, he literally beat the worlds 2nd best karate fighter at one point. This guy is smoking that copium for sure.

@vendriksondoesthings7911

2 ай бұрын

He was a martial artist however he let that go when his fame and ego got to him and now he's a sham hiding behind his former glory

@christmaslanterns6425

2 ай бұрын

@@vendriksondoesthings7911 I found Steven Seagal in the comments guys

@GregoryAlanBaileygamereviews

Ай бұрын

Steven Seagal knows karate, aikido, taek wondo, jiu jitsu and many other dangerous words.

@LeeSixTwenty

Ай бұрын

Plus Van Damme got to be in a Mortal Kombat game.

@potatosoup6960

13 күн бұрын

@@LeeSixTwenty Isn't Johnny Cage based on him?

The hugging and posing for photos with dictators really says the most about him

@Soulraven2735

9 ай бұрын

What's next, is he going to open CPAC with Victor Orban?

@sweethysteria8737

9 ай бұрын

I agree But To be fair, when it comes to dictators, being impolite can have really fatal consequences But considering he signed up to meet with them that doesn’t really apply But if I saw one in public I’d probably just nod before running away

@Robb1977

8 ай бұрын

Me, being an average, curious, non celebrity person... i feel like if i had the possibility of (safely) meeting some of histories most terrible and great people up close: id kinda want to. Like, if i could meet Ghandi, Putin, Stalin, Washington, Robespierre, Francis of Assisi, Saladin... just to get a greater sense of what humanity is. Are these people really any different than the average person when you just sit down for tea? Is their evil/greatness they cause by circumstantial ambition? but wanting to meet dictators just because you're famous and you have some ancestry that loosely ties you to those regions makes you kinda weird and icky.

@Robb1977

7 ай бұрын

@@Thalesium thanks for understanding, and thanks for noticing my error!

@A_Stereotypical_Guy

6 ай бұрын

​@@Soulraven2735you do realize cpac is pretty anti government right?

Apparently, Steven Seagal got to Jon and took revenge on him.

@kennynegron3291

3 жыл бұрын

What happened to this guy I only watched his flex tape one did he quit KZread

@mikewalker9057

3 жыл бұрын

@@kennynegron3291 nah he just as huge spaces between his uploads that’s all

@kynsilok

3 жыл бұрын

@@mikewalker9057 he uploaded last December for that golden Adsense so he might suprise us this year. We will see

@chuckn4851

3 жыл бұрын

@@kynsilok I'm honestly hoping for another Tim Allen Christmas movie special

@MrFrigginAwsome

3 жыл бұрын

Let him out to do a goddamn shitty mobile game ad.

I've always felt that Steven Seagal is a parody of himself.

@MrLunithy

3 жыл бұрын

Like Meat Loaf

@CastleFilthy444

3 жыл бұрын

BondBurney.

@rickv9180

3 жыл бұрын

Well, after he sold himself for the Russians, he is indeed a parody of himself

@mrcritical6751

3 жыл бұрын

Pretty sure he’s a Family Guy cutaway that somehow gained sentience, escaped the cartoon world and killed/replaced the real Steven Segal

@xmlviking12

3 жыл бұрын

aaronsdavis two scoops

14:33 Seagal has proven to be the living example of the quote "The lights are on but nobody's home"

We need a part two to the epic saga of Steven Segal. Definitely gotta bring up the infamous pants pooping incident that he vehemently denies to this day.

@robertcortez4956

Ай бұрын

This comment opens up a lot of questions.

@atomicgummygod9232

Ай бұрын

@@robertcortez4956tldr, story goes, on set, he claimed he could get out of any chokehold in front of his stunt coordinator, who was a judo expert. They set up the chokehold, he tried and failed to get out of it, passing out and shitting his pants in process.

@galladegamerletsplays

10 күн бұрын

the _what_

@atomicgummygod9232

9 күн бұрын

@@galladegamerletsplaysok so basically On the set of one of his movies, Steven claimed he could break any chokehold. Something about his “martial art skills” letting him do so. Now this guy, Gene LeBell, he’s a judo expert. And people wanted to see if he was actually able to do it or just sayin’ it, you know? So they set up the chokehold. When Steven says go, Gene starts choking them out. Steven tries to get out, fails. He passes out before he can tap out and shits an entire steak dinner while panicking. To this day, he denies it ever happened. Gene just said “When we had a little altercation or difference of opinion, there were thirty stuntmen and cameramen that were watching. Sometimes Steven has a tendency to cheese off the wrong people, and you can get hurt doing that.” Gene’s supposedly got a history of telling tall tales but frankly I like to think it’s true considering how aggressively Seagal denied it.

He's kinda like Buzz Lightyear at the beginning of Toy Story when he thinks he's legitimately a space ranger because it said so on his box

@bubblesbelmont5603

3 жыл бұрын

If you try to tell him other ways, all it will say on your box is your name, date if birth and death date.

@NyctoPhobia197

3 жыл бұрын

So this video is basically a irl version of toy story where Steven seagal is buzz lightyear and Jontron is woody and it's called guy story?

@buzzlightyear3120

3 жыл бұрын

To infinity and beyond

@bubblesbelmont5603

3 жыл бұрын

@@TorusLotus he is the pandemic's minion

@xxalex423xx

3 жыл бұрын

@@TorusLotus nah buzz cand do a karate chop and fall with style

Steven Seagal seems like the kind of guy who lied his way to everything and got too deep that he can’t turn back lol

@Ratchet130

3 жыл бұрын

Glad someone else thinks so as well. Lol

@Ratchet130

3 жыл бұрын

@@PunMister Which "anime" might that be, boss? Lmao

@notatrollll

3 жыл бұрын

Pun Mister care to share?

@mad4song01

3 жыл бұрын

Penile Necrosis he’s more like Mr. Satan from Dragon Ball Z.

@raketnyamuk9458

3 жыл бұрын

I think this is what's actualy happen

I think the most underrated part of this video is how Jon nailed how weirdly Seagal runs.

The whole chopsticks in the guns bit almost killed me, my lawyers will be in contact soon.

Segal acts like he’s going through a mid-life crisis, but that’s his whole personality

@puppet1show626

3 жыл бұрын

r/rareinsults ?

@MrCompassionate01

3 жыл бұрын

Agreed, Segal has been in a mid life crisis his entire life

@AngelaMerici12

3 жыл бұрын

Good description!

@doublebassman123

3 жыл бұрын

Ya but Hard To Kill is pretty cool tbh.

@grantlynn1659

3 жыл бұрын

Dude. You just gave the perfect description I didn’t know existed

Steven Seagal honestly seems like a character who would be on the simpsons or something as a parody of holywood martial artists

@macharper5352

3 жыл бұрын

Hes on an episode of southpark thats about him being a pussy amd needing a safespace 😂

@reversezoom4285

3 жыл бұрын

@@macharper5352 lol i was about to say that

@barelyinsane4642

3 жыл бұрын

Johnny Bravo had the best spoof version of Steven Seagal.

@karlrosal5891

3 жыл бұрын

L

@MrNatedunkin

3 жыл бұрын

South Park baby

Here's a translation of his singing "Now that you're gon' have to see I got $700, baby You ain't gon' remember me" And then "Everybody knows I'm here!"

@JohnSkao

6 күн бұрын

*actual gibberish*

It's kinda funny that your parody of steven is much more sympathetic than the real one.

The reason he hasn't made a video in two months is that Steven Seagal tracked him down and killed him

@EhlistarsWrath

3 жыл бұрын

8:01 you wonder why he got shot right here~ it’s just like Bruce’s son!

@GrandRBLX

3 жыл бұрын

what the f-

@efreeteu461

3 жыл бұрын

That's so sad, RIP in peace John Tron

@dominicjackson6122

3 жыл бұрын

no it's because Raid shadow legends has him and his family hostage

@skiffy8121

3 жыл бұрын

being a jontron fan represented by spongebob *****spongebob by the mailbox***** IM WAITING, IM WAITING, IM WAITING *****patrick walks up***** WE'RE WAITING, WE'RE WAITING, WE'RE WAITING

Sometimes it boggles my mind that Steven Seagal is a real person. He’s like a character from South Park that came to life

@Ehzvarious

3 жыл бұрын

Steven Segal in South Park is equally as ridiculous.

@pjishomo

3 жыл бұрын

STEVEN SEBOOM BOOM

@lt187

3 жыл бұрын

Steven Seagal is in a South park episode

@Ehzvarious

3 жыл бұрын

@@lt187 Season 19 episode "Safe Space".

@narcleptik

3 жыл бұрын

Sooo true

11:56 If you look closely, he basically did hit Steven's bullet hole, but he probably pretended like it wasn't close enough, because that would mean that his trainee is as good of a shooter as him.

@overlordghs1081

Ай бұрын

Also, the guy was “training” actually had better control and trigger discipline over his weapon and probably shot better. Steven everytime he shot would jump the gun which is when you pull the gun up before pulling the trigger, thus affecting your shot. Dude is just a fraud.

Segal is perhaps the most legendary Green Beret Ranger Special Forces Navy Seal Federal Investigator that ever lived.

No one gonna mention that Putin actually speaks english, but refused to speak english with Seagal?

@mohammadalbader3538

3 жыл бұрын

Oh vlad does this with everyone, unless it's something important then he'll just use a translator

@Mamenber

3 жыл бұрын

It's pretty hard to express yourself on the same level in a foreign language than in a native language, unless you have a speech prepared. Also, you'd probably expect someone who calls themselves a Russian to speak Russian.

@mohammadalbader3538

3 жыл бұрын

The page I read basically said that he only spoke English during trips to English speaking nations for political reasons

@pgreg8528

3 жыл бұрын

@@mohammadalbader3538 still, that means he is able to. We should also remember that Putin has no normal background, wasn't He in the KGB? Surely people there learn languages.

@scottwilliams645

3 жыл бұрын

@@pgreg8528 I believe he was either a KGB agent or leader

The fact that Steven Seagal learned martial arts from a short order cook in a back alley explains EVERYTHING.

@oksomynameisjeff4212

3 жыл бұрын

seems like he's the type of guy who'll copy any movie he sees

@itwasidio1736

3 жыл бұрын

Despite being a fake martial artist, he's still had good acting in some movies. His current endeavors are questionable, though. Least he's not getting cancelled.

@borsemusic9928

3 жыл бұрын

That doesn't mean anything just someone's a short order cook doesn't mean they can't know martial arts you can't define somebody by their job title

@wolffang489

3 жыл бұрын

@@borsemusic9928 True but when the result is Steven Seagal it all starts adding up.

@lordginger636

3 жыл бұрын

When you say it like that it sounds like you are saying he isn't a real tough guy, better watch your back lol

Steven Seagal is like that kid on the playground who makes up crazy stories about himself. he insists that he fought a dinosaur and won

Steven Frederic Seagal was born in Lansing, Michigan, on April 10, 1952,[12] the son of a medical technician and a mathematics teacher. His mother was of Irish descent, while his father was Jewish.[13] His paternal grandparents were Russian Jewish immigrants.[14] During an interview for the Russian talk show, Let Them Talk, Seagal stated that he has paternal ancestors from the Siberian city of Vladivostok, as well as Belarus and Saint Petersburg. He stated that genetic testing determined that he has Yakut and Buryat ancestry as well.[15]

Steven Seagal is the coolest, toughest, most talented and interesting person in the world, according to Steven Seagal.

@googlepoodle5814

3 жыл бұрын

The Steven Seagal when Harry Met Sally skit on SNL is a gem if you haven’t seen it

@reginald8228

3 жыл бұрын

Yet he looks like an absolute and complete mong

@gerbmcnuggets5466

3 жыл бұрын

And dangerously high in saturated fat and fructose

@newguy371

3 жыл бұрын

He's nowhere near as cool as RAID: SHADOW LEGENDS!

@Briguy164

3 жыл бұрын

*sniff*

MISSING Jonathan Tronathan Have you seen this man? He was last seen making fun of Steven Seagal.

@nardopol0

3 жыл бұрын

Also answers to Timothy Brentwood

@Ryu1ify

3 жыл бұрын

He's gone. Steve got him.

@kingcrab1774

3 жыл бұрын

sounds like a jojo character

@jaredsabatelli2459

3 жыл бұрын

Dam has it really been five months

@durururururururu

3 жыл бұрын

better get started with turning his subreddit into Scott the Woz's again

6:49 Never heard Jon laugh like that before

Imagine you go to the park and Jontron is there dressed as fuckin Steven Seagal

Steven seagal looks like a deepfake of himself on himself

@jc329co3

3 жыл бұрын

Johntron dressed up as Steven seagal looks more like Steven seagal than Steven seagal looks like Steven seagal

@simonwu7250

3 жыл бұрын

It's like his face was on his body

@greasycheese9050

3 жыл бұрын

Even his face looks out of place on his body He can't just not look out of place

@joya8292

3 жыл бұрын

@@jc329co3 I say he looks more like Sam Hyde

@TheBfutgreg

3 жыл бұрын

I assume it's because we cannot comprehend an "accomplished" "actor" acting in such a way....but yet....beHOLD!!!

Steven Seagal is just a katana neckbeard that made it to Hollywood. Kind of incredible really

@_ikako_

3 жыл бұрын

I love how he puts an accent on "karate" but still pronounces it wrong.

@blahooper

3 жыл бұрын

The perfect description

@Ramsey276one

3 жыл бұрын

Fully agree

@MrHarrissirraHrM

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for the perfect explanation.

@BewareTheLilyOfTheValley

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah, when he informed he was scouted not at an actual audition but a carnival show, I could only roll my eyes. I didn't know aikido masters needed to walk everywhere with a swagger to prove they're tough...on account of how peaceful the method is and it just uses the person's momentum against them. Between that and needing the gun, something tells me the gun would be his first method of defense in a fight.

Coincidentally - Steven Segal was also called by the coroner when Alec Baldwin shot that one woman on set as well. Sure enough, he struck gold again. It WAS, in fact, a bullet.

I think there's a saying that you can judge a man by the company they keep. So Seagal being friends with Putin and Lukashenko really speaks for itself

“You’re here to shoot the child but only the child with the weapon” -Steven Seagall -JonTron

@IdeasManfourteen

3 жыл бұрын

I lost it at that line 😂

@DeathStar-ok7cm

3 жыл бұрын

The funny part is it’s true

@electricenergy116

3 жыл бұрын

Timbuk204 use gun on child with gun

@rainabove1945

3 жыл бұрын

-Timbuk204

@DavidGogginsLover94

3 жыл бұрын

-Wayne Greztkey -Michael Scott

Later that day, Steven Seagal found Jon and flipped him to death.

@TechInspected

3 жыл бұрын

I mean, JonTron hasn't uploaded since this video. So I'd ask Steven Seagal.

@zosowon

3 жыл бұрын

this is 100% canon, rip jontron

@Driver-Nephi

3 жыл бұрын

F

@user-rc3kr6dk8k

3 жыл бұрын

Actually they ruled it as a suicide; he flipped himself to death.

@roachdoggjr419

3 жыл бұрын

@@user-rc3kr6dk8k because Steven segal was at his door

I rewatch this video periodically. I don't know what it is about it, but it always has me coming back. Quality content.

17:04 this just shows how narcissistic he is. He's totally out of touch with reality " oh you're amazing!" LMAOOO

And the wild jontron returns to his cave to hibernate once more.

@Joebama1911

3 жыл бұрын

But seriously, where is he at?

@LocalGuardsman

3 жыл бұрын

@@Joebama1911 Seagal and OJ "got even with him".

@rakelodakel

3 жыл бұрын

And to inhale MAGA copium

@LocalGuardsman

3 жыл бұрын

@@rakelodakel Twitter mob, eh? Why are you even here if you hate him so much? All it takes is just a single press on the “Ignore this Channel” button, my guy.

@machomanrandysavage7553

3 жыл бұрын

@@LocalGuardsman no

Raid Shadow Legends sponsorships are the closest we'll ever get to Jon doing Game Reviews again. Update: I really love Jon's new videos, just thought I'd bring it up. Update #2: I wouldn’t be surprised if Russia makes a movie about the invasion in the Ukraine and they get Steven Seagal as the Russian “hero” of the movie.

@itriggerpeople4433

3 жыл бұрын

Sad but true

@Ganjiel

3 жыл бұрын

The truth hurts

@myhairisverypoofy7741

3 жыл бұрын

😔

@user-sh4jk5pk6e

3 жыл бұрын

He’s lost the edge he had when he was younger, man. Changed style too. Just compare his videos from the beginning with these now. Still happy that he still churns out content though. Edit: Full stop

@itriggerpeople4433

3 жыл бұрын

@@user-sh4jk5pk6e true, he's inspired a lot of KZreadrs to spawn similar styles

Segal is truly a legend in his own mind

Aikido was originally a hand based technique used to prohibit your opponent from drawing their sword. It was useful and fairly effective provided it was used in the right context.

I feel Steven Seagal is almost doing a better job parodying himself than Jontron

@KCzz15

3 жыл бұрын

I dunno man, Jontron does a pretty mean job of parodying himself too.

@remlezar9397

3 жыл бұрын

This does feel watered down. Diet Jontron.

@kylesoler4139

3 жыл бұрын

He is like a GTA Character IRL.

@bubbles8871

3 жыл бұрын

Keyword: _Almost_

@justanotherperson7774

3 жыл бұрын

God Bless Your Perfection

August 1, 2020 A man named John Tron went missing after smack talking Steven Seagal

@reginapotiomkiniene7478

3 жыл бұрын

Yes

@Otamatone69

3 жыл бұрын

John must have gotten flipped and then died

@idrissjewai8100

3 жыл бұрын

Hope he is good

@commandergree7316

3 жыл бұрын

Good to see another trooper in these comments.

@bigpimp7329

3 жыл бұрын

Happy to see the boys in the comments remembering our fallen soldier

When Steven Seagull was born, the police chiefs of Romania and Nicaragua called his parents to congratulate them on the success. He joined the Romanian special forces at age 6 where he met the CEO of the CIA who hired him to become undercover president of the FBI.

Jontron's portrayal of Steven Seagal is more accurate than Steven himself.

Steven Seagal is like if Chuck Norris made up every joke and meme about himself and actually believed them to be true.

@stuartward1755

2 жыл бұрын

In Chuck's case though they are all true

@aestrobloome

2 жыл бұрын

chuck norris is a legit, black belt level martial artist and has proven it. steven segal is a joke.

@SHINOBI-03

2 жыл бұрын

@@aestrobloome Check Norris was one of the lucky few to battle Bruce Lee. What's in Steven Seagal's credit?

@commander57

2 жыл бұрын

Chuck Norris was a 7 time full contact world champion during the golden age of fighting martial artists.Steves claim to fame in the real world of martial artists?

@DonVigaDeFierro

2 жыл бұрын

@@stuartward1755 JoJo makes Chuck Norris references.

Why didn’t Putin flip onto his ass when he shook Steven’s hand??

@zankeekee

3 жыл бұрын

Best comment I have seen so far.

@danielwilliams7161

3 жыл бұрын

Putin weights 16 tons. He's pure adamantium.

@rockdragon3

3 жыл бұрын

Thats why he holds his own forearm, its to prevent his killer instinct from activating

@Kfo221

3 жыл бұрын

LMAO

@nuclearocean

3 жыл бұрын

'Cause Putin is also a martial artist, so he tried to flip Seagal the other way around and they negated the yeet If cameras were a bit lower, you could've seen the ground crack

3:32 Is my favourite JonTron laugh ever. It makes me grin without fail.

I’m worried: Jon smack talked Steven Seagal and we haven’t heard from him since. I hope he hasn’t roughed him up too badly.

@KenLinx

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah I hope Seagal's alright.

@realfreemaple

3 жыл бұрын

yeah

@JimmyBoy9878

3 жыл бұрын

@@KenLinx Ouch..

@moboots

3 жыл бұрын

I think hes dead

@DatOneCat

3 жыл бұрын

Nah, this is normal for him to suddenly disappear for a long time. He's still alive based off his Twitter feed (December 19th). So don't worry about it.

so, is he just gonna disappear for another 12 months then come out with "Steven Seagal: Certified Tough Guy 2"

@BladeStorm4497

3 жыл бұрын

And then disappear again

@gwenpolo1307

3 жыл бұрын

@@BladeStorm4497Nah he's gonna do quality content at a refreshing pace for like 8 months before leaving for a full year. This is the cycle of Jon.

@PeterPan-gp4ru

3 жыл бұрын

@@gwenpolo1307 It's a disappointing one. Glad I dont pay him.

@flameyboy4184

3 жыл бұрын

Nah flex tape 3

@PaulieAFantoneJays19

3 жыл бұрын

I'd actually be down for that...i highly enjoyed this video

Why is nobody talking about how his karate story is straight up the story for karate kid-

That rubber arm is 100% comedic gold! I love it . Jon: Goes on hiatus again."I don't like where this is going".

“You’re here to shoot the child… but only the child with the gun” I was fucking dying

@jawwer12

2 жыл бұрын

Much like the child?

@Insert.Oregano

2 жыл бұрын

@@jawwer12.. but only the child with the weapon

@jamesonrouchbach2853

2 жыл бұрын

9:00

@f1shyspace

2 жыл бұрын

Where you the child with the gun?

@MinscFromBaldursGate92

2 жыл бұрын

Don't make me do this!

Kind of worrying that jon disappears after he talks shit about steven seagal

@rdlegends3988

3 жыл бұрын

He is active on his twitter... :-)

@redmenace5552

3 жыл бұрын

@@rdlegends3988 oh really? I dont have twitter whats he up to

@MangoSkinner

3 жыл бұрын

@@redmenace5552 training to fight Steven seagal

@bluthian

3 жыл бұрын

I think he doesn't want to feel pressured to make videos

@lao-grotten1101

3 жыл бұрын

Steven flipped him like a pancake

He was seriously trying to reign himself in with those coke drips he was getting every time he sniffed and swallowed. 😂

Jon: How exactly do you wash a dish in a fashion that will impress a martial arts master? My mind: …wax on, wax off…

I'm terrified that JonTron just turned around and got a perfect headshot on that paper dummy- The power this man has

@ShinziiArt

3 жыл бұрын

Lmao

@kirbyfreakyt4695

3 жыл бұрын

Nooo I had the nice amount of likes but several people liked at the same time!

@lepewthepew8408

3 жыл бұрын

GAMER

@anonymoose6873

3 жыл бұрын

With his luck it probably was shot in just one take too

@SneakySteven

3 жыл бұрын

He did my dear, he did

The only thing I want in life now is for Steven Seagal to teach Martial Arts to Gwyneth Paltrow, and at the end of the episode they meet up with Dan Akyroyd to drink some Crystal Head Vodka

@Bowiiihowdy

3 жыл бұрын

And they get some leaks and use some flex seal

@troillandford7679

3 жыл бұрын

Then they all workout with OJ

@Krozbot

3 жыл бұрын

golden and underrated comment

@blahblahsen1142

3 жыл бұрын

i mean, at least dan akroid sells drinkable vodka in a cool ass bottle. he's crazy but you get what you bought. out of the 3, he's the only one who's not a con artist, he's just a weird guy selling booze. i like like booze.

@ma5terbuilder012

3 жыл бұрын

Mr Worldwide

I’ll never forget it. My mom had a friend of a friend come over to help with something and we got to talking. The subject of martial arts was brought up and it turned out he was well versed in Aikido. We get to talking some more and he explains how it works, yata-yata-yata, he starts to show me some moves. One such demonstration he wanted me to throw a punch at him slowly. In martial arts demonstrations, it’s usually not a problem to go at a slower pace so you can better analyze the technique. What he didn’t know was that I had a modest background in boxing. In boxing you’re taught to lead with your left rather than your right. So, in slow motion, I throw a jab with my left. This startled him so much that he had to straight up stop the demonstration and ask me if I was left handed. I told him no but I knew some boxing. So he explains that most guys throw punches with their right hand, so he straight up wants to start over but this time, he instructs me to throw with my right. At the time, I didn’t think much of it, but now that I know much more about fighting, that was really pathetic. Your “martial art” trains you so repetitively and monotonously that your reflexes are dulled to the point that you cannot even process something happening in SLOW MOTION. If your martial arts school only does demonstrations without letting you spar, you’re not fighting, you’re doing choreography. Karate is a big offender too in some cases. Many dojos don’t allow their students to spar because “the techniques are too dangerous”. So, when they go and pick a fight, they get their asses handed to them because their opponent wasn’t as complicit with being attacked as their dance partners were.

This is the first video ive seen on this channel. I havent laughed since 97. This dude had me in stitches. Def subscribed. Keep it up.

Steven Seagal is that guy in high school who said he was a physcopath and that he could kill someone, but is scared to ask a waiter for water at a restaurant

@fmhqbattousai

3 жыл бұрын

There's a perfectly reasonable explanation. Obviously the act of asking for water at a restaurant, when performed by someone such as Steven, would cause the waiter's heart to stop out of fear. His schi (that's steven-chi, for those uninitiated) is so honed by his years of practice in Aistevedo that simply looking in someone's direction for any extended period of time could cause them to age rapidly (hence his schi blocking sunglasses, as seen in his meetings with Vlad and that Watermelon guy). But yeah....I think you're probably right.

@keane6

3 жыл бұрын

unfortunately that was me back in middle school

@mozzerellafolla443

3 жыл бұрын

@@keane6 i have nothing to say besides... oof

@elrey1176

3 жыл бұрын

Too scared to ask for water but not too scared to basically molest woman under the guise of a "massage"

@Sionnanful

3 жыл бұрын

He’s the type that would wear a trench coat and would act like he could kick a football players ass, but instead gets beat up behind a garbage bin.

The only thing Steven Seagull is fighting now is diabetes.

@generalconcannon202

3 жыл бұрын

Holy shit you fucking killed him dude

@travismcdowell8352

3 жыл бұрын

Talking about diabetes is Wilford brimley still alive?🤔

@HaplessOne

3 жыл бұрын

Oof

@zeche8477

3 жыл бұрын

Travis McDowell Wilfred Brimley (dead) is still alive, yes. Edit: Jinxed it

@sonyachurch9482

3 жыл бұрын

And judging by his finger nails, a fungal infection as well.

The end of “The Maestro” bit is even funnier when you know what he’s actually saying, which is “EVREH BODEH KNOWS IM HERE”. In other words the lead guy was trying to like shout out Steven and how he’s excited that he’s there and Steven is just like “dude no shit everyone already knows”

@BenersantheBread

10 күн бұрын

We can all learn from his humility

Why is the visual of Steven segall playing on the swings with a stongebob ice cream from the ice cream truck literally the perfect description of my view of him😂😂😂

Steven is one of the best examples of “fake it till you make it”

@chrisredfield6274

2 жыл бұрын

And then keep faking it

@JamKyt9

2 жыл бұрын

Fake it till you fake it

@EricDodsonLectures

2 жыл бұрын

... except he never really made it.

@chrisredfield6274

2 жыл бұрын

@@EricDodsonLectures Except he did. Do you know how much money he made on Under Siege alone? Let alone all the other hits he was in from the 90s

@EricDodsonLectures

2 жыл бұрын

@@chrisredfield6274 ... Well, there's more to life than money. In fact, it's entirely possible to be incredibly wealthy... and yet a complete, pathetic wreck of a human being in all of the ways that really matter. And I don't think you have to look too far into the realm of celebrity to find an easy confirmation of that. Such seems to be the case with Seagal.

Jontron doing his monthly “I’m still alive” video.

@krysmrug6478

3 жыл бұрын

He actually isn't alive. They use clones of him, which are killed after every video. How do they keep making clones if Jon is dead? Easy. They keep his corpse.

@diobrando666

3 жыл бұрын

@@krysmrug6478 👀

@krysmrug6478

3 жыл бұрын

@@diobrando666 *pulls out gun* PRAY TO ALLAH. *NOW*

@92RB20Monster

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah,that or money was getting low in times like these 🤣

@loaf_bloke_will_eat_ur_soul998

3 жыл бұрын

Yes. I'm the real Abe! Oh that explains it.

3:32 😂😂😂 I absolutely loved that part of Steven Seagal ‘singing’ (if you can call it that). I can’t help but crack up every time I see it and I have to go back and watch it several times 🤣🤣🤣🤣

@galladegamerletsplays

10 күн бұрын

"ABRIBUDENOSAMREUGH"

Brendan lee: gets shot Set crew guy: call Steven seagall „hey Steven we shot a blank gun at Brendan but now he’s dead“ Steven Seagall: „yeah must have bin a bullet“ Set crew guy: „you’re amazing Steven“

Steven Seagull: The Russian, The Asian, The Texan.

@aliekexie8467

3 жыл бұрын

You missed Italian

@mohitsalhan9344

3 жыл бұрын

*The Mongol-Russian-Jewish emperor of our hearts*

@PapaRikkiBalls

3 жыл бұрын

The black man

@SwiftNimblefoot

3 жыл бұрын

I thought he was native american...

@stalebread9825

3 жыл бұрын

Swift Nimblefoot nah he’s martian

He’s like a human multi-tool, that doesn’t work well with anything.

@monkeyspice2010

3 жыл бұрын

more like just a human tool

@danteXcrossing

3 жыл бұрын

So a dummy waiting for the ventriloquist to operate him

@jungleinsectspikewall4474

3 жыл бұрын

Or at all xd

@tomcroosfunni792

3 жыл бұрын

A Swiss army knife created in Pakistan.

@jamesbuchanan5962

3 жыл бұрын

So a hammer with a Swiss cross

17:14 "No, we didn't call the ambulance. We're calling you, dude."

9:59 I don’t think Steven seagal could run that fast 😂😂😂

The best way to finish an interview : "sir, are you armed right now " "yes" "thanks for joining us today.."

@amasthedude1387

3 жыл бұрын

What sort of f***ing interview was THAT?!?!?!

@pyramidhead6998

3 жыл бұрын

@@amasthedude1387 An interview with Steven Seagal, the fuck did you expect?

@fatufatu

3 жыл бұрын

“It’s been an absolute pleasure.”

@catdogmousecheese

3 жыл бұрын

"If I was to look around this room, right now, would I find an arm of some kind?" Why would you phrase it like that? Seagal: "Yeah, there's a grenade in the flower pot, there's an uzi under this cushion, and I there's a samurai sword duct taped to the back of my chair. Your producer said he was cool with it."

Regarding his comments about Jean-Claude Van Damme, This is from Wikipedia: "In 2008, actor Sylvester Stallone declared to the British magazine FHM that "At a party in my home in Miami in 1997, Van Damme was tired of Seagal claiming he could kick his ass so he offered Seagal outside into my back yard." According to Stallone, Seagal made his excuses and left while Van Damme tracked him down at a nightclub and challenged him again. Stallone finished by stating "Van Damme was too strong. Seagal wanted none of it."[82]"

@homunkulus819

3 жыл бұрын

Lmao

@wpeniche

3 жыл бұрын

harry delgato well duh, everyone knows The Expendables is based on a true story as told by Stallone.

@lordquaz7154

3 жыл бұрын

Say what you want about Van Dam's movies but the guy has balls.

@yoavsnake

3 жыл бұрын

+

@geekymetalhead5112

3 жыл бұрын

As much as I enjoy both of their movies, I'd place my money on Jean Claude

The playground part woth the ice cream truck had me in chuckles, but when the arm fell off i absolute lost it. Damn i have missed watching Jon vids 😂

Oh geez, this was the funniest one ever! My sides were hurting. Thxs man.

Jontron really perfected the role of Steven seagal by showing how tough he is by biting that spongepop

@graphicsgod

3 жыл бұрын

Ice cream, pizza, donuts, beer, burgers, carrots, watermelon.. they all don't stand a chance against Steven Sagal!

@micahrobbins8353

3 жыл бұрын

Ooh I didn’t even think of that. Now my teeth hurt, thanks

@simonhicks5973

3 жыл бұрын

This is perfect for the top because as soon as those credits roll you go down to the comments and see this

@mattlandry

3 жыл бұрын

I am a martial arts Master and want to get in contact with him. Those are teeth meant for martial arts.

Steven Seagull looks and sounds like he's remembering and forgetting everything every second.

@SepticFalcon

3 жыл бұрын

Thats because hes making it up ;)

@steelmonkeyy

3 жыл бұрын

well he has to remember what he made up many years ago

I don’t think I'd trust Stephen Segal to tell me the details about Brandon Lee's death. I'll stick to what's been said by the crew and coroner.

Steven Seagal is a 6’4 man with a napoleon complex 😂

It's impressive how he manages to look lost and confused no matter where he is.

@willsbury5150

3 жыл бұрын

even in his own house

“So basically, this guy is a guy” me explaining to my teacher the protagonist of my story

@christopherdempsey3878

3 жыл бұрын

"Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes."

@ultrabigfella

3 жыл бұрын

Me explaining to my Dad the white middle aged man with black hair that's an alcoholic and a mass murderer I play as in every RPG.

@idontwanttoputmyname403

3 жыл бұрын

I mean...the Everyman is a trope right? Still works.

@darthyourfatherfigure7821

3 жыл бұрын

Same

@VVabsa

3 жыл бұрын

Yes

No one's gonna talk about Jon's accuracy with his pistol?! If that isnt edited that's amazing

Aikido is not a fake martial art. The origin of martial arts is not that of fighting, but in the name it itself....art. True aikido masters do hold some ability to use their art for defense, but those like Segall who pretend it is meant to be used as an offensive fighting technique, bring shame and confusion to some the most beautiful forms of human expression.

@Noobzlikeu

10 ай бұрын

Yes and no. Aikido was developed by Morihei Ueshiba as a combination of his martial arts studies, religious beliefs and philosophies. Its intended use is as a method of defending oneself while also protecting the attacker from unnecessary harm. According to Wikipedia, the primary objective of aikido is to "overcome oneself instead of cultivating violence or aggressiveness."

@marrow1243

10 ай бұрын

So...its like dancing?

@alionintights4074

10 ай бұрын

@marrow1243 if you see martial arts as a dance...then that is what it is for you. But it can be much more...depending on how far you want to push your limits.

@sneakysnake7695

10 ай бұрын

​@@marrow1243it's actually very good for learning to break falls, good for minimizing damage when you're thrown to the ground in a fight. A good martial artist combines the strengths of many arts to form a wide arsenal hence MMA was born.

@marrow1243

10 ай бұрын

@@sneakysnake7695 Oh, thats cool. So is Steven Seagal good at it?

Fun Fact, Sylvester Stallone has told a story of Seagal being a prick at a house party, and Van Damme called him out on it, saying he wanted to take it outside. Seagall then immediately got into his car and drove away. Van Damme followed him to a bar, and gave him the offer again, to which Seagall once again left.

@russiandrago821

3 жыл бұрын

Van Damme would destroy Seagal! Even looking at them today you can see Van Damme is in better fighting shape.

@blragh

3 жыл бұрын

??? I need to see this

@lionheart6176

3 жыл бұрын

and van damme doesn't even need cocaine to defeat segal

@konstantinosmas3950

3 жыл бұрын

You idiots. VD wouldn’t even touch him. He is the only westerner to TEACH aikido in Japan. VD knows his shit, he really does, but S is actually a master. As to why aikido looks false google it and you will understand. It’s all about that split second action, the momentum acts after that, if you done it well it’s over.

@blragh

3 жыл бұрын

@@konstantinosmas3950 also hes a reincarnated Buddha

Is this the JonTron Waiting Room?

@frankie1948

3 жыл бұрын

No. You can leave

@randorecruit1269

3 жыл бұрын

Yes it is. The toilet is the fifth door on the right. If you need some food there is a restaurant on the other side of the street. If you are tired there are beds upstairs. If you wish to leave you can do so.

@Miguel-bv3ei

3 жыл бұрын

I got a reservation for next video, gonna be waiting a while.

@tywillis2395

3 жыл бұрын

Yes. Welcome.

@thepencilcunts

3 жыл бұрын

No this is Patrick

you just flip a guy😅you just throw a guy😂this is perfect definition of aikido❤

This is gold.... I had a good laugh thanks.