The full video: kzread.info/dash/bejne/eHd3krqedtfLhJs.htmlsi=3Qu_aiXO_Qk06ZYp

This is hardly fair. You only had 30 minutes to think, draft, and redraft this story. Disney had millions of dollars, teams of writers, and any resource they could want at their disposal. So of course your story is bet... wait, how did we end up like this?

@randyduff4758

5 ай бұрын

The more money and options you have, you then have to adjust to their point of view. That is why powerful corporations are buying franchises which can then be used to push their agenda.

@Wendeta-hq2cp

5 ай бұрын

It's the unearned profit syndrome (don't think it's real yet, so I will invent it). Since Disney never really contributed anything to the original Star Wars, their righters didn't undergo the journey of growth the original ones did. Even if they read and studied the source material with a fine tooth comb, it still would have not felt the same. It would have been a hell of a lot better, but I digress.

@josh7827

5 ай бұрын

@@Wendeta-hq2cp You have a fair point and I don't necessarily disagree with its concept but I do think it generously points to the writers lack of knowledge to the source material for how it went terribly wrong. Watching the Disney star wars movies, I can only believe the writers intentionally sought to destroy the original characters and mock the established lore. It wasn't a lack of knowledge or time to absorb the source material that brought down Star Wars. It was disdain.

@greygaston1263

4 ай бұрын

@@josh7827 maybe for Kathleen Kennedy, and all of social justice by extension, but Dave filoni’s been writing Star Wars since before it got bought out by Disney, he’s one of the good guys!

@josh7827

4 ай бұрын

@@greygaston1263 I very much disagree that Dave Filoni is "one of the good guys." I do believe he is a fan. I believe he want Star Wars to be great. However, I have zero confidence in him as a story teller. Dave has lead the writing in the majority of Disney star wars content that's been released in the last couple years and yet the fan base continues to decline. The stories get weaker and weaker. Filoni's only success is when he includes original characters in his scripts to prop up his own creations.

Problems disney has with star wars: -planning plot - changing characters offscreen to the point they are not recogniseable - following the rules of star wars and the force - the whole sequel trilogy - pointless cameos that add nothing to the plot

@user-yq9im9dk9z

5 ай бұрын

They're played by same actors, a lot to recognize - Bob Iger, probably

@gregrobinette8620

5 ай бұрын

& - Pushing an agenda

@greygaston1263

4 ай бұрын

How is following the rules of star wars and the force a problem?

@gregrobinette8620

4 ай бұрын

@@greygaston1263 ze Patriarchy (equal rights) is Oppressive (fair) to the Minorities of America (people we want to enslave).

@Jiub_SN

4 ай бұрын

@@greygaston1263their not following it is the problem, confused me as well lmao

i would pay to watch your version 10000x before even considering paying for Disney+

I'm a big western fan so I must say that I really enjoyed the first season. Sadly it lost "the way" afterwards 😢

@timewarpdrive77

7 ай бұрын

Never lost its way.. got worse, yes... but it was always bad

@kylec2761

7 ай бұрын

I thought it was basically Kung Fu in Space in season 1, and that was fine, Kung Fu was fine.

Really loved this part of the video, Disney apparently did not think planning was necessary for their multi billion dollar franchise

@Janx14

7 ай бұрын

Its really weird this continues with the shows, when this was a common complaint about the sequel trilogy.

@kurtwagner350

7 ай бұрын

@@Janx14 I think it’s a consequence of the power struggles behind the scenes at Lucasfilm, it seems there are multiple factions fighting for creative control and money for these projects and collaboration is not happening on any level. Even Filoni and Favrou seem to not be on the same page anymore. This and the issues of massive writing rooms filled with inexperienced and bottom shelf writers diluting any creative vision or cohesion for the franchise going forward.

Who else just wants to see a show where the New Republic dumps a few force-sensitive children/teens on Luke, plus a few really cynical/jaded rebel army misfits for protection. The whole season is just Luke interacting and forming friendship or mentorship bonds with these characters, which leads to a new perspective on the force and insights into Luke's philosophy with his new order.

@timewarpdrive77

7 ай бұрын

All roads lead to the sequels; until they're purged, it doesn't matter

@rachelclark6393

5 ай бұрын

Me! I do! I mean, as long as Disney is writing it I'm glad Luke is dead to them. The longer they keep their grubby hands off Luke the better. But if someone actually good was writing it, I'd be pleased. I can always pretend the sequels just don't exist.

“Lizzo’s agent called. We’ll fit her in somewhere. (God knows how, but we will)” was an amazing line

@WhiteIkiryo-yt2it

5 ай бұрын

Pretty sure she can cameo as a moon somewhere.

@RandomResearch57

4 ай бұрын

@@WhiteIkiryo-yt2itthat’s no moon

I didn't read the title properly and thought this was a synopsis of Disney+ star wars. For a second I thought, "I don't remember the story being this good." Then I read it again...

@veameal9725

7 ай бұрын

Literally what happened to me. I enjoyed this one. Really want some bounty hunting and new order arcs as described

Thats basically the only way to save star wars now.

@bigbear1045

7 ай бұрын

I mean, yeah, it's a bit too late, and it aint ever gonna happen.

@timewarpdrive77

7 ай бұрын

Huh?

It's amazing what can be achieved with a bit of worldbuilding integrity. Continuity is a weighty word, yet Disney have completely forgotten its meaning. I like this outline fairly well. I would like to see better integration with the New Republic and other grander elementes, but it's a good starting point. This kind of preplanning and laying out of plotlines and character introductions and arcs should not be so difficult. I find it very interesting that it seems to be overall the single weakest aspect of Hollywood writing.

@Aybrix

7 ай бұрын

I'm reminded of a quote from the Power Rangers movie in the 90s, "How could I forget, I never knew!" Disney just wanted to acquire these IPs to print money with minimal effort while working the CGI artists to the bone. There wasn't anything to forget, it wasn't factored in in the first place. Also yes, I like this outline idea and would totally make me wanna check it out.

@AliRadicali

6 ай бұрын

I find it so bizarre that Hollywood will spend hundreds of millions trying to polish a turd rather than the couple of hundred thousand dollars needed to draft a decent script before shooting starts. I think many of the problems stem from the "We'll just fix it in post" attitude, where it is theoretically possible to make anything happen in the editing bay nowadays, so filmmakers don't feel any pressure to get it right when they're shooting the damn thing. If I were a studio bean-counter tasked with making Disney money, my rule would be simply to refuse funding to any project until they present me a completed screenplay. Just imagine how many disaster-filled productions that would have prevented, how many millions (billions?) in reshoots that would have saved.

@FunkyDouch3000

6 ай бұрын

@@AliRadicali I think this rabbit hole goes way deeper than that, but you're definitely on to something. For sure, ensuring the scripts are complete and solid before beginning production is a good first step.

I like your ideas, interesting concepts and I'll take it anyday over Disney current iteration of Star Wars. Thank you for sharing your thoughts in how it could be. For me I think it can be enhanced so fans go berserk at the end within the show and within Star Wars as a whole. The sequence of events: Season 1: -Mando is introduced -He defends his covenant that is being hunted down by the Empire -Drives them off world just for them to grip even tighter the entire system as rebels destroyed an 'innocent experimental health facility' (cloning facility). -They managed to recover some key asset for the Empire (Grogu is introduced, they discover he is force sensitive) -Gideon is introduced too, inquisitors are involved Season 2: -The situation is so bad the covenant flee the planet, first to rail up Bo-Katan aid in Mandalore and then the New Republic directly rejects helping them -Ahsoka literally goes alone to help the group and manages to barely escape with them. -Thrawn is introduced saving Gideon, losing the darksaber. -A new call for help to the New Republic is made Season 3: -The New Republic joins the war to stir the war barely in their favor -Luke Skywalker is introduced by saving them from the droids in the ship. (He was the one who convinced them to join forces with them) -They get notice of a key asset, a weapon so deadly that will change the course of the war -They go to capture that asset Mando, Bo-Katan, the Marshal, Ahsoka, and Luke. As the final move to end the war and force the Empire off the system -Starkiller character is introduced It may not be perfect my interpretation of that new show I'm describing, it may need a new name. But with similar characters and events, filling the gaps with emotional development and moments. I think it could honor the established things of Star Wars. Building upon those interesting things while introducing new ones, respecting the audience time and passion for those characters and events.

I wanna hear more of your version of modern star wars. Do you plan to make more of these?

Been a while since something was uploaded on this channel.

@LostChord

7 ай бұрын

Now BSUP’s moved channels (and is on health-related hiatus anyway), I plan on reverting this one back to the old style of content: excerpts and short reviews.

@ggt47

7 ай бұрын

@@LostChord Oh. I am sorry,I was not being rude I was saying I missed this.

Recently I compared Yoda & Grogu. Yoda's Eyes were created with Einstein in mind. He has Eyeballs, Irises & Pupils. Grogu on the other hand has the beedy eyes of a Rodent. At what point would it develop Eyes like Yoda? Lazy development or just a different species or more likely a genetic experiment.

I enjoyed this quickie. 💕 All hail The Little Tribune.

I'd probably throw in a few filler episodes for character development and to stretch it out to a proper 16 episode season. Probably keep Cara Dune and Cobb's introductory episodes since i liked both of their characters and felt like they could both have been utilized better.

Finally subscribed to Channel Deux! Glad your doing really well. Just awaiting Assoka vol trois!

@AmeliaBodilia

7 ай бұрын

kzread.info/dash/bejne/i3-TzrCIYdidd7A.html&si=kV6lnA7z0i3GojxY

The biggest thing that puzzles me is the question of oversight... where was it in the course of these productions? I am an author and work with publishers and the level of oversight and quality assurance gone through is far more significant than anything that seems to be going on here.

I like your take on Mando's initial encounters with Ahsoka and Luke, but that it also implies they have already met so that'd be another story sequence to flesh out in this revised series.

Just twisting the knife.

A company can have $1 TRILLION at its disposal, but if it doesn't have a coherent plan it will still lose money.

I'm about halfway through this video rn and this is amazing. I'm working on my own fanfic style continuation of a TV series from when I was little and this short video does such an elegant job of conveying to me how to right a tight and efficient outline for a script that still presents enough character conflict and plot to thoroughly explore 3 full seasons of a show. I am utterly astounded. May update on e I finish the video.

Well done on this segment. Thinking the series of shows through, it really does highlight that Disney's Lucasfilm are still struggling with the same problem they always have been since they bought the franchise: no communication, no forethought, *and no plan.*

i was hoping this was going to be a rewrite of the sequel trilogy, but that would take a hell of a lot longer than this.

Mr Platoon, it is sometimes said that there are people who could read the phone book and make it sound fascinating - you sir, do that with this (ridiculous) storyline, or whatever this was. Perhaps it was your apparent interest in the material, or the generous manner you endow the narrative, which I sadly admit, entirely escaped me. You have a beautiful voice and I did appreciate that, so thank you.

Gotta say, I love the idea of making excerpts of your long form content I *am* a bit disappointed this isn't a new video.

The problem I have with your version is not the story, which is clearly superior, but that it's all story. Most episodes of the X-Files weren't about the main story or even season arc. Not every episode of Buffy was about the overall story. Most were one offs facing a villain of the week. Since TV became a prestige medium, TV shows are more interested in telling one continuing story. I don't think that has been for the better. Because those one-off episodes left a lot of room for telling different types of stories and how to tell them. They also allowed for better characterization and helped with pacing. That was why I enjoyed season 1 and 2 of Mando and why season 3 dragged.

@Jiub_SN

4 ай бұрын

I think you could break it into 2 seasons with the 11 overarching stories split between the two with Luke appearing at the end of season one and the rest of the season filled with episodic stuff to keep that vibe, then make a season 3 exclusively bounty hunting or mercenary work with plots brought in from other shows maybe

Turn Grogu to the Dark Side, dress him like a tiny Vader, and give him his own show.

Please do the sequels next!!!! :)

You know Mando's end result is to show the origin of Snoke and the Emperor's sith cloning. It's a long game to fix the movies

@greygaston1263

5 ай бұрын

I think overload dvd would’ve disagreed with you there five years back.

It would've been so easy to write a great sequel trilogy with a female protagonist and a stormtrooper developing a conscience. The premise itself is a absolutely compelling. But Disney decided to create boring, brain-dead nonsense.

I really wish they had watched star wars: the old republic's 'Returned' trailer as their insperation and kick off point

Ahsoka existing is a no go for my timeline; she's a tumor. Got to cut that shit out so it doesn't kill the host

More platoon!!!

Yeah it was a free kick where they somehow managed to put the ball into the toilets and knock themselves unconscious.

If we lived in the correct timeline, people like you would have written these stories in the first place

AY UP LITTLE PLATOON

Wipe the board clean. Just do heir to the empire. Jettison filoni lore.

I would watch Star Wars stuff again if it were this good. Have you considered starting a series of Masterclass videos about writing?

the comment on lizzo actually made me lol. we'll fit her in, god knows how.

Bravo 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

Disney at this very moment: Send a platoon to this man’s location, he’s using his brain too much and isn’t consuming the next product we’re letting out of the sludge pipe! This rewrite of the mandalorian sounds really interesting to watch. Discarding the filler/what didn’t make sense for the show and rearranging the overall plot like this makes it work well. If only this had been the version we got. Also, aye, the side channel isn’t dead anymore, yey!

How dare you shoe horn Luke Skywalker into Star Wars? Kathleen Kennedy would get a heart attack. No gay chick? 😂

How does ahsoka and mando link up in your story? I love the idea infinitely more but just curious how they got into touch

@greygaston1263

5 ай бұрын

Same way they linked up in the original story I guess.

@floweralligator

5 ай бұрын

@@greygaston1263 so thru some video game esk fetch question from bo katan… rad

@greygaston1263

5 ай бұрын

@@floweralligator exactly.

I like it, but you forgot the part where Mando accidentally shoots Rey's dad during one of his missions. Wait we need empty cameos. Uh.. Jar Jar shot him.

It was electric boogaloo 2s fault

My question is this if you took the greatest writers that ever lived and put them all in a room and asked them to collectively write a good story could they do it?

@MisterGames

6 ай бұрын

No, short answer. Long answer is how many writers and who decides they are great? While The Talisman is a good read imo, how would it have been with King and say Stephanie Myers who can only write in first person past tense. Heck i think we would get garbage from First Person Present Susan Collins and FPPast Stephanie doing a colab.... Aside from who is considered great, they each also have different processes for writing. Some aim for 2000 words daily. Some 500 done dusted and polished words. Others think 10,000 a day is a good target. And poor old author of Bonfire of The Vanities managed 135 a day for his follow up book and took 11 years to get it done.... Then we have the garbage we saw from the SW writer room whiteboard, dinosaurs, diversity, no war. Oh FFS. Ten guys cannot agree who is the better looking female, 10 female cannot agree who is the better looking male. A room full of writers will not produce a good work. That is some long lusted for communistic ideal of fiction output where everyone is equal.

@kevinarmstrong478

6 ай бұрын

@@MisterGames An excellent answer and I agree. I don’t think these guys could collectively write a good story not because they are bad writers but because writing a story as a group is almost impossible. Interestingly writing a comedy as a team always seeps to work well.

You saved time, money, and Star Wars? Noice.

I'm gonna be extremely nice say it's not as bad as everyone says. And for you to disagree that's okay everyone has their own opinions. I'm not saying your opinion is wrong but it doesn't get the credit it deserve. It had problems but what else doesn't. It's pretty unfortunate how the internet soured the series for a lot of people who might actually like it had they not been convinced by youtube and twitter that they didn't like. I'm sad to say i'm one of those people. I was one of those people that fell into this rut and hated it because the internet told me I hated this. I heard a lot people say it deserves to be cancelled. Which's a pretty hateful view that I don't like to take even if there's a little bit of truth there. You have to remember that there's so many people involved that didn't do anything wrong they just started to work and work there asses of to make the things they could. make.

Gay genius is gay genius, fly friend, there might be some fried chicken at the end.

tbh i couldn't get into the Mandalorian after he got full beskar gear it got borin like clearly, he is the main character, so he is unlikely to die but still now there is no threat from blasters and really any bombs aswell this and Pedro's horrid acting just makes it boring now but all that is just my thoughts also would of preferd they kept grogu with luke tbh

Way back when George Lucas wanted to pay homage to the serialized films he admired. When John Favreau was a kid there was episodic TV. He was paying homage to that in Seasons one and two of the Mandalorian. Not sure throwing out episodes for a seasonal narrative arc is the point.

Where can i watch that show?

@LostChord

7 ай бұрын

One day I’ll be able to hook my head up to a screen, but until then, you’ll just have to imagine it.

@sunbehm

7 ай бұрын

@LostChord but I don't have an imagination. That's why I need TV and movies.

Who's Ahsoka?

@harbl99

7 ай бұрын

"She was your father's exotic alien apprentice. A fine piece of jailba-" That's _quite_ enough from you Obi-Wan!

@timewarpdrive77

7 ай бұрын

Garbage mary sue fanfiction

If they leaned more into Mandalore being Jerusalem and Mandolorians being the Jews I think the show and the universe would be a lot more interesting with that at play. I don’t think Favreau knows enough about jewish culture and history to do that well enough though

@MrTwon1610

7 ай бұрын

Meh...Jerusalem isn't solely for the Jews, you're thinking of biblical Israel even then Jews and Hebrews arent the same religion,.....but I get where you're coming from

@bigplayquay9891

7 ай бұрын

@@MrTwon1610 no of course not that’s the whole beauty of Jerusalem. Every religion holds that land dearly and has some sort of biblical historical moment take place there, but Jews/Canaanites have a real strong claim to that land because it was promised to them by god. But why I said it would be great for the show and universe is you have the mandolorians who’ve been through hell the prior years and spread all across the galaxy unite and finally with the unity and strength they built from only being able to rely on each other they go back finally and reclaim the homeland they feel entitled to while having to fight off different groups that want that land and live in the fear that someone will always come for their land or extinction

Hola prro!!!!

Remove Rey Make Finn main character Have Luke be Luke Remove Holdo, Rose and Palpatine there, fixed it.

@timewarpdrive77

7 ай бұрын

Just make the EU canon again and close SW down for a few years.... Go on hiatus for 10+ years.

Haven't watched this video yet, but a great way to improve the ending to the 3rd season is if the Armoror was actually working with Moff Gideon and betrays Mando and her cohort. Then we find out later that she had made a pact with Gideon years before to give up the secrets of Beskar armor and keeping all the other mandolrians away from his project in return for letting her cohort of children go. This would explain how Gideon got the secret of making Beskar armor and why everyone thinks Mandalore is cursed and not worth returning to.

u

One of the shortest videos you ever made

@LostChord

7 ай бұрын

That’s because it’s an excerpt from one of the longest videos I’ve ever made!

@jailcatjones3250

7 ай бұрын

@@LostChord love it

Why on earth would the _Star Wars_ writing drones write in motivation for their characters? You can just watch the original content that they're ripping off wholesale ( _Lone Wolf and Cub_ ) if you want all that smartypants big brain stuff. Just consume product.

I have not seen any new Disney Star Wars… except the sequels. Those were terrible… I heard good things about the first season of Mando, but I’m glad I fell off before wasting my time and money on subscribing to Disney plus… I just watch these videos and have more enjoyment then I would disappointment lol

@mazkeraid4039

7 ай бұрын

You’re better off getting a bootleg version of The Mandalorian Seasons 1 and 2 DVD.

Old wounds. Andor. I recall someone in the show saying that prisoners were cheaper than droids. I'm not sure about that. Prisoners need fed and guarded. That costs money. The prison need to be remote a secure. We must assume they built their facility over the sea to prevent prisoners escaping, so using prisoners must be getting quite expensive by that point (it also turned out to be pretty straight forward to escape). The cost of the droids shouldn't matter to the galactic empire, who must be quite wealthy. Droids don't need fed or guarded, nor do they need sleep. The droids can be maintained by maintenance droids. They won't share secrets, they won't try to escape, and they have resale value (bringing that cost down yet more). Even if the droids did cost more, it still makes no sense to use pressganged prisoners to assemble the parts of a top secret prototype planet destroying space station, because the cost should not be a factor. Is this weak writing? They needed a reason for the prisoners to be there doing the work instead of droids, so they said "for reasons unclear prisoners are cheaper even though droids are affordable and much more practical, so let's move on and not question it". I call that weak writing. 🙃

@boobah5643

7 ай бұрын

That's an interesting definition of 'straight forward' you've got there. Fairly sturdy, too, with the heavy lifting it's doing. Second, cost matters a lot when you're building something planetoid sized. Especially when there's fortunes in graft to be had. Third, the why doesn't matter, but some possibilities that don't seem to break anything immediately: Inertia. A small version of the prison labor camp put up good numbers, so they made it bigger. And again. At each step of the process, it seemed to make more sense to do 'the same, but more' rather than start over from scratch. Ideology/Religion. We don't know all that much about new canon's version of the New Order or Sith philosophy, but they may for whatever reason think it a good to use prisoner labor. As an example, consider that the weapon uses khyber crystals, which implies some Sith science involved, and constructing the thing with human suffering could be an important ingredient. Point is, it's not hard to come up with an excuse sufficient to suspend disbelief. Heck, part of the point was how stupid and wasteful the Empire could be.

@Melvin-Deeply

7 ай бұрын

@@boobah5643 I think they probably had other less important things they could use the prison labour on, such as mines and labour camps. The droids would have been worth the cost just for the secrecy. Not to mention efficiency and security. Money may have been a issue. But how much is secrecy worth during the construction of a top secret weapon? Is it worth twice the price? Yes. Is it worth ten times the price? Maybe. It's not the only bit of weak writing in Andor I think. It's not watertight by a fair way, though it's so far ahead of Ahsoka and Obi Wan that it might look unsinkable in comparison.

@Melvin-Deeply

7 ай бұрын

@@boobah5643 I'll add that, having worked for years in manufacturing and logistics jobs, it is always more profitable and more productive to automate whenever possible. That's pretty much been a constant truth since the beginning of the industrial revolution.

You lost credibility with me when you get rid of The Rescue. What's wrong with you?

Can you tell me why you are coming across as an IA version of yourself? What’s the deal?

Crazy that normies are better than multi millionaire writers

It still sounds like garbage. Let's try a more interesting franchise that isn't obsessed with Space Wizards and Cosmic Jesus