She gave him no consequences to his behaviour. No wonder he kept doing it

@Bucketus.Lord.of.Buckets

6 ай бұрын

99% of reddit stories would not exist if the OP had a spine

@lastofadyingbreed4850

6 ай бұрын

@@Bucketus.Lord.of.Buckets My (25f) stepsister ss (23f) is getting married to my ex(26m)

@user-ip8vf2ky9p

6 ай бұрын

@@Bucketus.Lord.of.Buckets I know right if redditors weren't such a marshmallow then they wouldn't get cheated on so much

@velco941

6 ай бұрын

Right, she is a doormat

@nathanosaka3977

6 ай бұрын

Lol literally

man this story pissed me off so much. op was too kind, a doormat even, i hope she's found peace and learnt how to dump toxic people out of her life instead of trying to hold everyone together.

@Devin-O

6 ай бұрын

Same every sentence made my blood boil she was such a god dam doormat she is pathetic.

@angel-nv7jk

6 ай бұрын

For real and she should've told the whole family the first time around about the cheating

@Hanzo1

5 ай бұрын

being a spineless fool and being kind aren't the same thing

@kyberion

4 ай бұрын

@@Hanzo1very true. I do think she may be both. Just from the little interactions we got with her mother it seems like that this is the norm. After a while you stop fighting back

@andrewburton6664

3 ай бұрын

Is there any more?

Honestly speaking i find it hard to sympathize with OP. She found hard evidence of him cheating on her emotionally then physically. She should have left him in the 1st instance but if she didnt why did she stay after she found out he stayed at AP's house.

@Tomiisomaa

6 ай бұрын

Doormats dont care when they're stepped on.

@LeenaOSullivan

6 ай бұрын

Yeah I spent the entire story wondering why the heck OP is so damn spineless...then it got to the mother and it hit like, like 'Oh...that's why' OP's the scapegoat, she's been raised to be spineless

@mechtim

6 ай бұрын

we could also ask, why do people go back to their abusers? sometimes it's just not easy to walk away.

@greysky8307

6 ай бұрын

@@mechtim Cheating is a form of abuse, especially serial cheating, you're right on the money.

@angel-nv7jk

6 ай бұрын

​@Tomiisomaa fr, she is so spineless. She doesn't have the right to be mad when she did nothing to preserve her self dignity

Let me guess, few years later, update : my family blame me because my ex who leave me for my sister cheat on her.

@lastofadyingbreed4850

6 ай бұрын

My (25f) stepsister ss (23f) is getting married to my ex(26m) is the original, a lot has been changed

@princessqueen6881

6 ай бұрын

​@@lastofadyingbreed4850 Ohhh

@jackchop1576

6 ай бұрын

There's one like this where the ex started beating the sister and the family went off on the OP for not warning her that he was abusive even though he cheated with that sister.

@Kingdo_RGT

6 ай бұрын

@@jackchop1576 Yeah, I was thinking on that one.

@lalalovengun

6 ай бұрын

@@jackchop1576wow!! That family is so delusional!!

If her Grandparents and cousins didn’t attend the wedding in protest, why didn’t any of them reach out to OOP? Seems odd to make such a stance without talking to or comforting OOP

@Dmitrisnikioff

6 ай бұрын

I don't know, I can understand perfectly well holding them both in contempt after hearing all this

@angel-nv7jk

6 ай бұрын

Obviously it's because OOP is the scape goat. The punching bag and doormat

@robertdouth8979

4 ай бұрын

Hmm, that's a good question. It's almost "unbelievable" that it would happen that way doesn't it?

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." ~ Maya Angelou

@lemonz0880

6 ай бұрын

i love this quote!!

@prince_sylex

5 ай бұрын

"No second chances" ~ the tenth Doctor

Why is she not addressing to everyone the fact that her sister is one of the reason they broke up part of his cheating on her. Wtf is wrong with op

@gordybrown3667

6 ай бұрын

Because it's fake

I am a little irritated at OP, as she gave her sister a free pass. During the intervention, she chould have mention how dispicable it was for Aunt and Mother to tell OP that she should support her cheating ex and his affair partner. Now that pain will seem like vindictiveness.

@CanadianGreekhoplite

6 ай бұрын

I don't blame her for that, it's hard to say anything when it's 3 on 1 ambush especially with her terrible mom.

OP says that ex didn't talk to his father cause he's a cheater, like that makes ex's cheating a surprise. He cheated on OP a month after they started dating and OP was shocked because he kept doing it the whole 7 years?? Wow.

I'm surprised it made it past the 2nd offence. 7 years? 7 years?💀💀💀

@OTDinosaurScrubs

6 ай бұрын

OP gets cheated on like 4 times and says “okay this is your last chance”

i would've lied and gone along with all the wedding stuff up until the day before, then ghosted her on the actual wedding day. just imagine the fallout of her talking it up to everyone, then being left standing alone with no replacement moh

@TA-qm2jf

6 ай бұрын

Or make a presentation of their cheating/exposing the story to everyone at the wedding

@Ready-ForTheEnd

6 ай бұрын

Have to agree.

@mintymilka9400

6 ай бұрын

@@TA-qm2jf even better! start it with a heartfelt speech about their love and make it sound like a sweet retelling of their romance. "as a gift, I put together a documentary of their love and how they found each other"

Op should have sent a text to her sister saying "I don't want to watch you die of STDs." Then block her and never look back. Cause no matter what happens next, that won't leave her memory. Plus when he eventually cheats, she can't be mad at op for "not warning her".

The sad thing is that when Jake inevitably cheats on and then abandons OP’s sister for his next new love, OP’s sister and mom and just going to blame OP for “not warning them”. Hopefully OP can just laugh in their faces and give them the middle finger at that point.

@rogueshark23

6 ай бұрын

What goes around comes back around.

@Mia-dt3gl

6 ай бұрын

@@rogueshark23 Yeah, but they’ll still blame OP for everything. 🙄

@LadyWolvie82

2 ай бұрын

I think that's what OP will do, give them the middle finger. Hopefully, a future update reveals that OP's mother cheated/wrecked a relationship in the past, something that the younger sister learned.

It hurts to know that she could've given a speech as MOH, basically telling the truth. But she didnt.. Man I dont understand why people think petty revenge is bad. Now where is his consequence?

Op is the physical manifestation of" i can fix him"

@1crackhead822

6 ай бұрын

Literally

@tommybell4850

Ай бұрын

Exactly. When thinking u can change a man goes wrong. Don't feel sorry for her.

hard to sympathize with OP when she pretty much let him have a one sided open relationship

Baby once he was cheating multiple times, you wouldn't leave. Why would he change? Why are you surprised?

@tommybell4850

Ай бұрын

Op is slow, has low self esteem, weak, pathetic, spinless doormat. Who can feel sorry for her, its her fault she put herself in this position. It's her fault for staying with him n allowing him to treat her like trash. Can't feel sorry for her.

im calling it, the sister will go through the shame shit as op, but will still blame op, with bullshit like "why didn't you convince me" or some BS excuse

OP could have summed up the history with her cheating ex with “he cheated on and lied to me several times in our relationship and I kept taking him back.” No one cares about the details of spinelessness tbh it’s just hard to listen to.

"I have no spine and I must stand" a story by OP.

TL;DR: OOP's sister insist on marrying garbage. Mom insist for OOP to show up. OOP stays away and get therapy.

Thats what happens when u forgive a cheater

@tsukishimasglasses3140

6 ай бұрын

Real lmao like do people don't have self respect

@dumbidea1007

6 ай бұрын

Dude I can get a guy forgiving a women. It's gross and I will never do it but I think I can get it but this is way past that that's someone having affair in front of you

@thousandyardgavri2785

6 ай бұрын

""But I love him, but he's funny, but he's an awesome guy, but but but..................""

I’m sorry but after the first time he cheated you should have left but the fact that you stayed and let him do that do you for several more years shows you have zero self respect and just desperate for human attention and affection

@scpfoundation8376

6 ай бұрын

Judging from what we know about her family. They’re probably the reason why she ended up like this.

This sounds very similar to a story with the same scenerio, only in that one OP begins dating someone her sister was crushing on. Her sister NEVER dated this guy, he didn't even know she existed, she just had a crush, and everyone demanded OP break up with him because he belongs to the sister...including the sister

@OTDinosaurScrubs

6 ай бұрын

That is actually ridiculous, the entitlement is unreal

@lovekangth2994

5 ай бұрын

Can you tell me the title? i need to read it now.

You cannot do this to your own sibling. Thousands of singles out there, and you ended up with your sister's ex, of all people. Wouldn't be so surprised if they're each others' fuck buddies. It's so common to see so many people engaging in those types of activities in the dark with the lights closed and the curtains removed so that everyone can see those details in full view, quality: 1080

@Ready-ForTheEnd

6 ай бұрын

The sister hates op and probably has for many years. That's the only reason she could possibly do this

Bro at this point it’s her fault. Why tf did she give him so many chances?? Never give a cheater a second chance or any chances

Honestly speaking I find it hard to sympathize with OP. She found hard evidence of him cheating on her emotionally then physically. She should have left him in the 1st instance but if she didnt why did she stay after she found out he stayed at AP's house. Sister will get what's coming for her. She is no better than the ex as she was cheating with the ex while he was in a relationship with her own sister. It won't be long when sister gets cheated on herself. Honestly speaking am glad OP is working on her low self esteem now.

"He cheated-" That's not good; dump him and move on. "-on me multiple times." WTF you still DOING with him???!!! I have the hardest time feeling sympathy for anyone who knows they've been cheated on multiple times by the same person. OP and those like her need to find someone who feels the same as them regarding expectations of fidelity and won't cross those bloody boundaries over and over again. They're just trying to hold onto something that'll make them miserable with a partner who won't change because why should they? OP didn't give him direct consequences for his actions in the moments when they were needed. Edit: had to do a 2nd listen and realized that she didn't even leave him, he left HER in the end. How freaking long was she gonna put up with this if he hadn't done that? At least she finally grew a PIECE of a spine and declined to bow to family pressure to go to the wedding. She would've been the queen of doormats had she done that. Hopefully therapy works its mojo and she gets stronger.

@carnage9912

6 ай бұрын

I know right, some people tried to give people second and third chances but once a cheaters always a cheater. She is a doormat and I get mad about that thinking "why are u with this guy?:

This could have all been avoided had she just left him after he cheated for the first time

I would've had sympathy if Op got cheated on by different guys. But no.... She could've at least kicked that man in the balls every time he cheats. Instead, She just lets him get away...

So many people think that a wedding is so much of an event that it's worth defining whole lives and relationships around. Weddings are important, but it's ultimately the marriage that counts. People whose egos are so fragile that they can't handle not having every single thing go their way disgust me. OP was absolutely right in sticking to her guns and putting herself first.

4 min in, and this woman is such a door mate! Not even a door mate. She the whole front yard.

A cheater will cheat again so now op can point and laugh when he cheats on baby sis 😅

Huge consensus that OP is an idiot. There's no way anyone with common sense would stay with someone who cheats constantly. There's either a huge plus he gives to the relationship, which she proved otherwise, or she's so afraid of finding new people for her life that she'd rather get cheated on. Good on the extended family for shaming sister.

@shrikaripeddamatham

6 ай бұрын

EXACTLY

So, ex happens to have an emotional affair with little sis, and the family just brushes off what they did to big sis?

Found a very similar story on Reddit from two years ago from a deleted account. A few details were different, added, or taken away but I think these were both made up by the same person. Still a good story though.

I bet 100 bucks that the ex is definetlly going to cheat on the sister.

Yeah you should have left him the first time. He didn't make a fool out of you. He proved you are a fool.

OP stayed with a guy with 0 ambition, drive and not taking consuling for past trauma - she should have left him then and then even without him cheating

Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me, fool me eleven times. . . .

So OP just spent 7 years being a clown? And wtf is she confronting him for when she was just going let it pass. I literally have no sympathy for her. She should go to the wedding, they’ll need entertainment at there

@anjali.....994

6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂same ... i was irritated by her behavior

Leave those chumps behind you you don't need them. The only thing you need is to love.

A lesson from coach, "Women will stay with a man who sleeps around if other women view him as desirable"

Bro halfway into the story I forgot what it was about like bro the story abt ur sis why u telling us the whole history with him

I never understood why people when they get caught say "I can explain" or "Sorry, I do not want to lose you" these types of people are truly awful Narcissists

OP is too dumb to deserve winning her family back thus I think this is the best outcome that could ever been. I mean, she could end up killing herself over this or the family or the family could end up imploding during the wedding due to more drama but at the very least it all stays somewhat peaceful considering the lack of brain cells everyone in this story had. OP could have easily show proofs of her ex serial infidelity to her family to paint a really bad image during their breakup or after the engagement announcement but she shows up with her emotion in turmoil and her facts in hiding. People will keep blaming OP for this even after her sister inevitable divorce due to her not warning them about her cheating ex. Once a loser, always a loser. Use your brain, you won't end up in vain.

This woman has absolutely no standards. She's getting on my nerves.

..."And after the thousandth time, i started to grow suspicious."

@anjali.....994

6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂

Not sure if she is too kind and delulu or has an extreme amount of patience and self restrain…..

Fool me once, shame on your. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me twenty times, I have a self-esteem problem.

So the sister knew that when she met this guy he was dating her sister and still went on with it? And she only thought it would be “okay” to reveal it because it had been 5 months???? Like wtf terrible boyfriend obv but also terrible sister

Sometimes you can just tell some people are a ten without even having their appearance described. Like that's that's only way multiple women give him this amount of leeway

Man no one deserves to he cheated on but OP kept sticking her hand into a fire, getting burned and then doing it again

Fool me once shame on you fool me 6 times I’m a doormat.

This dude is living proof that any guy can find a girl to love them, if they look hard enough.

She thought it was crumbling after 7 years... That relationship was doomed from the beginning.

OP is so irritating by letting a serial cheater go unpunished.

My (25f) stepsister ss (23f) is getting married to my ex(26m) is the ORIGINAL

i couldnt get past the first 2 minutes, the way OP speaks about her ex is the exact same type of person i dated a few years ago, except the mother cheated and not the father, nonetheless he hated both and ended up couch surfing while trying and struggling to find a job, mooching off of me and his friends and flings. if a guy/girl youre interested in tells you about their parents cheating, or being cheated on confidently, leave. cheating impacts more than the person who you cheated on,, your children or friends may engage in your behaviours, aswell as your significant other, maybe not on you but on other people they date.

@shrikaripeddamatham

6 ай бұрын

Ikrr

It wasn’t just Op, who didn’t give her blessings to marry her ex, but other family members silently protested by not showing up.

People wonder why she's the way she is HELLO LOK AT HER MOM . Seriously what type of mother does what she does it's horrible.I hope op never lets anyone ever hurts her again.

It took him to break up with you after multiple years of cheating 🙄 Weak!

Imo the worst thing is how the mom cares more about her daughters social status over OP's feeling and overall relationship. The projection is is insane. The OP totaly enabled the cheating and should have put her foot down after he cheated the first time as the situation called for. The sister very likly new from the beginning that she was stealing her sisters BF and likely lied and manipulated the mom. At this point her immediate family shown their true colors and she should stay full NC because as we know that would only be the begining if they came back in contact. My god ive had enough redit content for today and it just started.

would it be victim blaming,if i said its her fault for not leaving this walking red flag the moment he strayed?💀

Mom: bend to my will or you're cut off from the family. What OP should of said: you promise?

Why didn't she say the truth about everything to defend herself? Instead of being looked at as an evil person? Her passiveness ruined her position in the argument

@shrikaripeddamatham

6 ай бұрын

Exactly

He cheated in the first month and that wasn't a red flag enough to get rid of this guy? Imagine spending 7 years of your life catching the guy your with cheating and continuing to waste your own time? When you could use that time to find someone that actually respects you? I can't feel bad for op at all. Also them trying to get her to go to the wedding, I'd block my entire family if they even so much as insisted after they found out he cheated. That isn't family anymore

not a single person has empathetic capability at all - the sister, the ex, or the mom. Holy cow OP will be so much better off without these people. Hoping for an update in the future as well since we all know their marriage will crash and burn.

She should’ve left a long time ago. After giving him a chance should be enough. It’s funny how she is firm on her decision on not going to the wedding but wasn’t firm when the ex was cheating

This OP !!! No sympathy she’s literally chasing the toxicity!!!

I have zero sympathy for cheaters but it's also incredibly hard to have sympathy for those who enable cheaters and that's exactly what OP did, she enabled her ex, his cheating kept going unanswered and in the end she's baffled he decided to break up with her and move on with someone he cheated on her with. Like what did she expect? Maybe the first time wasn't a deal breaker for her it was just chatting but at what point, at which threshold do you ask yourself what the fuck am I doing with my life? It was such a hard story to listen to, I have zero doubt she loved her ex very much but she never loved herself enough to leave him. Her whole family sucks ass though, kind of understandable why op seems to lack a backbone and selfesteem. I hope life got better for her.

She didn't complain as much when he was cheating on her

I don't understand the point of couples counseling when you aren't married. You're dating with the intention of marriage right?? If they aren't treating you right when they're just a boyfriend or girlfriend, it won't get better. Dump them and move on. That's the freedom and ease you have when you're only dating. You don't have to strive to make it work when you have no kids and no assets tied up together. Just leave. Its a trial and he failed multiple times. The first time was enough. Op needs therapy to get some self worth. He's garbage, of course he left for someone else and he will do the same to the new girl when he gets bored or h*rny.

You get what you tolerate, OP.

the biggest doormat in history

Props To Ur grandparents and Cousins

OP is an actual doormat, she should’ve ended it the first time he cheated

Why did she stayed this long ? Like, girl, you were just a joke for him

Wow, if this story was even a little true, I'd be really sad for OP.

bro... if someone cheats on you once and you decide to work on it with him, not my thing but understandable. However if he cheats a second time, he's gonna cheat a third, fourth and fifth time as well. She should've ended the relationship right then and there..

Dear God, almost everyone sucks in this story.

She's a clown. There is a saying going " fool me once shame on me. Fool me twice then shame on you"

TBH, if my family said that to me, I'd call it. Them: If you don't do "this," you'll be cut off. Me: OK, bye. And that's coming from someone with a really tight knit family.

Now I'm not one to victim blame but once a cheater, always a cheater. OP was a fool to stay with him and not have the self worth to break up. She wasted years and she let the cheater end the relationship. She deserved all those consequences for not growing a pair and breaking it off the first time around. Everyone knows it's futile to try to change a cheater

After the 1st cheat in a month I would have left. She stayed for 7 years and he was still cheating. Like girl. Don’t disrespect yourself that badly. And Ops sister is at fault. Especially since she knew it was her sisters boyfriend and the family can go step on a used needle for trying to get Op to be the “bigger person”

She didn't even show the family the evidence that the ex was cheating. God op's so dumb

Dude "our relationship started to crumble after 7 years" NAH your relationship been crumbling for those 7 years

WHY IS OP HAPPY FOR HER SISTER??!! SHE BETRAYED HER!

Sweetie…you really should have left the first time he cheated. I don’t know why she waited so long and after SO MANY cheating, but damn.

7 years gap between the sisters is kinda funny.

For some reason, the agreeable women always end up with the cheaters just cause "he had a charming smile"... its that freaking easy. No pity for OP.

Does anyone notice that any story with an intervention is going to lead into chaos and pure anger? Parents can not learn most times. It's like an intervention is the best option they have.

honestly this story was so…so that i genuinely forgot this was about her ex marrying her sister

Op let him just cheat on her all those 7 years.. bruh

She should of showed up in black and when the sister asks why tell her I though I was the MOH for a funeral not a wedding cause you will be getting a divorce soon enough.

I hope this story is fake cause this op is so stupid. She let him cheat on her over and over again with no consequences.

I never understood the clarity people describe these life situations with after but at no point in your bf of 7 years flaunting his cheating on you did you even have 1 brain cell.

glad op finally stopped being a doormat at the end cause that 7 year relationship? jesus f'in christ

So many red flags 🚩🚩🚩🚩😩

“As you can understand” NO I DO NOT