“I’m not like other girls, I’m worse.”

@erinsweeney3326

3 жыл бұрын

“I’m not like other girls, I have multiple severe mental disorders”

@adeer87

3 жыл бұрын

“I’m not like other girls, I killed a man in ‘92.”

@patrickfrost9405

3 жыл бұрын

"I'm not like other girls, I have a penis." "... my best friend is Merlin. This is normal."

@skeletonwar4445

3 жыл бұрын

@@patrickfrost9405 Thanks Artoria.

@mori5271

3 жыл бұрын

Im not like other girls, im actually clinically insane

A shelf of books, a throne of books, perfect hair management, and a cat? Is crimson the perfect Gary Sue?

@a-mellowtea

3 жыл бұрын

Either that or Book Jesus.

@seafoam6119

3 жыл бұрын

@@a-mellowtea book jesus was a type of Gary Stu. He literally was the son of god.

@haggisa

3 жыл бұрын

Sarah Tilgner Book Jesus, née Sue.

@florlozana6289

3 жыл бұрын

Yes

@KirstenMarie_MS3

3 жыл бұрын

@@seafoam6119 Depends on which interpretation you're going with... ELCA maintains that Jesus and God are one and the same.

Quickly, I grasped the door handle quickly, and quickly realized quickly that I had forgotten to quickly move aside and proceeded to quickly hit myself in the face with the door quickly.

@JaceSomers

3 жыл бұрын

It's astonishing how I astonishingly managed to get astonished by just how astonishingly much worse a single sentence can astonishingly get by astonishingly repeating the same astonishing word and its astonishing derivatives. Astonishingly, that's astonishingly not to say that I have not astonishing done so here to astonishingly provide further astonishing examples, for, astonishingly, I have.

@isdrakon9802

3 жыл бұрын

@@JaceSomers this is one of my biggest pet peeves in reading

@warriorwolvez

3 жыл бұрын

I hate that you made me read this with my own two eyes

@the_revi8762

3 жыл бұрын

I thought I was having a stroke when I was reading those parts.

@theskepticpirate156

3 жыл бұрын

Reminds me of something Dante Basco did in that one Nostalgia Critic video. "You have dishonored the franchise and so have dishonored me. The time has come to reclaim my honor you dishonorably dishonored by honorably honoring my honorable honor."

Is anyone gonna mention the fact that, to be called a YA novel, the characters do not have to be young adults. The book has to be MARKETED to young adults, but the characters themselves can be any age?

@loturzelrestaurant

3 жыл бұрын

Talking about Boring Parents... Clark Kents Parents were Badasses, especially the Father, though. Talking about Power-Systems though: 'Nen' from "HunterxHunter" is the arguably Best; so check it out and make your own Ability-Set regarding it, will ya? Honestly, Krimson Rogue hopefully reads and even answers this comment.

@anarchomando7707

3 жыл бұрын

@@loturzelrestaurant no Alfred was a badass Ma and pa kent just had nerves of steel And they had to learn how to reason with the child that can destroy planets with a sneeze

@matttriano

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah and I think she probably knows that; she only started taking about it randomly because she couldn't keep lying about the NYT list thing.

@shinymetagross1666

2 жыл бұрын

@@anarchomando7707 I will never forget about Ma Kent and Krypto during the Blackest Night

@sr2505

2 жыл бұрын

I really like the idea of a 75 year old woman who then has to save the world

Me: *sees the title* oh finally, another episode of watching a man slowly descend into insanity over a bad book

@thembo.rxghts

3 жыл бұрын

His whole channel you mean?

@callmekirbzz6648

3 жыл бұрын

Oh I'm not the only one who likes this?

@jackhazardous4008

3 жыл бұрын

This is what I come here for. Way too few people covering bad works of art with actual depth. Too often its "haha this is bad because it's bad and sucks"

@capitalism8381

3 жыл бұрын

Ah, another person who likes this as well.

@waterpillar1977

3 жыл бұрын

I am surprised that krimson still has santity left but he just praised twilight for doing something right am worried about him

"She's here for a quick action scene, then she disappears in a Lamborghini" Goals tbh

@vleedingrainboom3618

3 жыл бұрын

golden boy ep 1 i believe missed anime reference- was stoked that he chose fruitbaskets though one of my favorite. very inspiring at the time watched it many years ago.

@Zulf85

3 жыл бұрын

@@vleedingrainboom3618 have you seen the new fruits basket series? A total must imo - they're readapting the manga

@birthdayfruitecake8158

3 жыл бұрын

That's the life.

@vleedingrainboom3618

3 жыл бұрын

@@Zulf85 i have not actually, though i shouldn't be surprised everything is being remade these days. Almost like history is rewriting itself. Guess it is bored waiting on everyone to write their futures. 😅

@starrynight7783

3 жыл бұрын

Same

This book is basically what happens if someone thought Terrible Writing Advice Videos on Mary Sue and love triangles were serious writing advice.

@nohintshere

3 жыл бұрын

iT'S THE *LOVE TRIANGLE*

@apples6684

3 жыл бұрын

BUT WHST IF WE ADDED A LOVE TRIANGLE

@lacijuhos7613

3 жыл бұрын

@@apples6684 THE TRIANGLE IS THE STRONGEST SHAPE

@jazwhoaskedforthis

3 жыл бұрын

Wait wait wait, there’s a video series called terrible writing advice?

@lacijuhos7613

3 жыл бұрын

@@jazwhoaskedforthis There is actually an entire youtube channel called that, you should check it out, it's hilarious

I love the backstory of Lani Sarem. It's like she WANTED to be an industry plant and it failed miserably.

@joearnold6881

5 ай бұрын

Im sorry but I can’t get past the sixth word you wrote H…how do you pronounce that, exactly??

Had to do a doubletake because I thought the thumbnail said “Handbook for Mormons”

@witherrose1566

3 жыл бұрын

Is it like grilled mormons?

@lordkermit2647

3 жыл бұрын

I didn't know of this book before, so at first I just thought the book was called "Handbook for Morons"

@InoMercy

3 жыл бұрын

So did I

@johannesseyfried7933

3 жыл бұрын

You too? 😆🤣

@DopeioThePhoneBoi

3 жыл бұрын

Same

Dyslexia is an impairement to READ. An impairement to write would be "dysgraphia".

@teakrcmar7090

3 жыл бұрын

This! Yes!

@benderc.moriarti3419

3 жыл бұрын

@@teakrcmar7090 So annoying when authors won't make the bare minimum effort to get this kind of things right.

@usoppfangirl8153

3 жыл бұрын

as a person with dysgraphia the fact she names it as dyslexia really pisses me off. Even then, no one with dyslexia ever has wrote words backwards by accident. Dysgraphia is more "my letters are too big or small, and I can't write words in a straight line"

@louscrewed1060

3 жыл бұрын

@@usoppfangirl8153 I also have dysgraphia and I suspect it's because dysgraphia isn't as well known as dyslexia. Given she clearly didn't do any research she might not have known it existed.

@crowthewicked8344

3 жыл бұрын

It's worst when author do shit like this when fucking google exists and is easy to access

The 1, SINGLE way I think you could wrote the "she's beautiful, but thinks she's ugly" trope is: if it is made extremely clear that these beliefs have been internalized from years of being told by others that these features truly aren't pretty. It isn't false humility, it's genuine love self esteem and self confidence.

@Lucifersfursona

Жыл бұрын

If only being a consistently terrible person for years and years didn’t literally show on her face. Instead of working on her self esteem and personality she decided to make who she is as ugly as possible :/

@jadeharley7190

8 ай бұрын

Weirdly enough that remind me of the Uglies book series

@cesiluzherrera5342

3 ай бұрын

plus, it's already a real life phenomenon suffered primarily by WOC whose features were criticized for not being conventionally attractive (white) enough

4:41 She says it’s not a YA book because the MC is in her 20s. By that logic, The Boy In The Striped Pajamas is perfect for small children.

@gracekim25

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah…..😅 I read that in high school (and yes I get the joke)

@TravisBroski

2 жыл бұрын

Damn I can’t watch Up for another forty years

@meloneatingwolf1882

2 жыл бұрын

Then how the hell are we going to watch Highlander!?

@opalyasu7159

Жыл бұрын

Same with Night (Oh God…I didn’t like that book and the response to my opinion was pretty divisive)

@alexjewett7455

Жыл бұрын

We watched the movie version in history class. Perfect for little kids.

how does this woman write women like r/menwritingwomen

@Dreigonix

3 жыл бұрын

“You’d be surprised how little some women know about how women work.” -A female friend of mine

@multilad816

3 жыл бұрын

@@Dreigonix Is it possible that there are men who knew little of other men?

@Dreigonix

3 жыл бұрын

+multilad816 Undoubtedly.

@crowthewicked8344

3 жыл бұрын

@@multilad816 Uh... Definitely not me.

@catalin2766

3 жыл бұрын

@@multilad816 A good example is Onision and how he doesn't know how to write a boy, girls man or women or even a god damn phrase

In the words of Caleb Joseph, the trees didn't deserve this.

@Grumplebumple

3 жыл бұрын

I keep half expecting that to pop up

@suppasitsup

3 жыл бұрын

"Trees died for this..." -krimsonrogue

@meganfurtado6229

3 жыл бұрын

@@Grumplebumple Binod

When Y/N was “standing up” to the mean girls feels like it came out of Wattpad

@sadrabbit53

3 жыл бұрын

"Y/N" 💀💀💀

@friendofdavid

3 жыл бұрын

actually though. that exchange made me cringe harder than a Y/N "my mom sold me to One Direction" fanfic.

@thatlycantomboy

3 жыл бұрын

this comment gave me psychic damage

@xc_gwpl

3 жыл бұрын

@@friendofdavid the what fanfic

@alyssaj8779

3 жыл бұрын

At least most Wattpad writers are just kids and teens just starting out ... this is a grown woman writing this trash.

As soon as Skye Turner described Sarem as having 'a bit of a gypsy soul', I could hear the alarm bells ringing.

@kirbysthiccthighs

Жыл бұрын

literally- especially because the g slur is well…. a slur (not a lot of people know this but a Roma person or anyone who knows anything about Romani people and culture absolutely would, so if Lani really _did_ have a “g***y soul,” she wouldn’t be comfortable being referred to as such.)

@hungryburger1170

10 ай бұрын

Sarem's Romanian? Explains the stealing

@HaliaStone

9 ай бұрын

@@kirbysthiccthighsdepends on the person, I imagine. Tyson Fury markets himself as the gypsy king and even calls himself such in his Netflix series.

@kirbysthiccthighs

9 ай бұрын

@@HaliaStone 1000% yes- people absolutely can reclaim terms used against them to take back their power, i was more so referring to having someone else (who hasn’t had that same lived experience) refer to them like that

@crowthewicked8344

9 ай бұрын

What the hell does that even mean?

i'm a tarot reader, so for the tarot reading at 1:05:29, here's what those cards mean: 1. eight of wands: this card generally signals haste. in romance, it might represent a short, flighty fling, but it's a card meant for rushing with no attachment--not just in romance, but in life. 2. three of pentacles: this card generally represents hard work! for a relationship, it means you're already in the relationship and are working your ass off, but it doesn't just signal 'a relationship'. 3. three of cups: parties and good times. this one's probably the only semi-accurate card she mentioned. 4. the sun: often when this card comes up, for a relationship reading, it's cause there might be a pregnancy. as in, a current pregnancy. otherwise, it's a good luck card. 5. five of pentacles: i think this is why she said it would be rough? but it's more than rough. five of pentacles is a hard card--it signals bad times, bad luck, and most importantly, turmoil. for relationships, this is generally pulled with divorce. 6. nine of cups: kind of a haughty card. i generally think of it as an adrenaline card--fame, entertainment, good adult fun times. 7. king of wands: this is an interesting card for this? she seems to be really picking and choosing, and i'm guessing she might have picked this one 'cause it can mean loyalty. however, it can also represent someone who's emotionally closed off. now, that's everything in the upright position. she doesn't mention if they're upright or reversed. reversed is essentially the opposite of all that. from that reading, i'd gather she'd have a short, fun relationship that might end up with her being knocked up.. but i also don't really read for the future. the future is mutable, so cards can't tell the future. the way i like to explain it, essentially the cards are just advice, and the advice is based on the concept of 'there are no coincidences'. it isn't a coincidence you drew the card, there's a reason you drew it. also, off the top of my head, i have no fucking clue what spread she did. it's seven cards, so i'd guess.. horseshoe, maybe? but she's not reading it like you really would read a horseshoe spread. idk. the whole reading and description is a mess.

@KrimsonRogue

3 жыл бұрын

Quite informative. Thanks for the input.

@maightandmagic

3 жыл бұрын

@@KrimsonRogue of course! glad i could help out. thanks for the awesome video!

@olivierluisin1790

3 жыл бұрын

Thanks it's pretty interesting to learn as a fan of tarot... Can say a question?

@olivierluisin1790

3 жыл бұрын

@@maightandmagic what should I do if I want to create a card? To imagine one?

@maightandmagic

3 жыл бұрын

@@olivierluisin1790 those are called oracle cards! unlike tarot cards, these cards are unique and aren't part of a standard deck. while you can buy oracle decks, it's often thought better that you make them yourself, because then the meanings are specific to you and what you find important to divine. (:

Mary Sue check test: •Rare, unusual, special name •Love triangle/harem/everyone loves them •special overpowered powers •whacky hair colour •gorgeous looks but says "I'm so ugly!" •"flaws"

@mercurywise4047

3 жыл бұрын

•Character who exists only to make them look better

@ninavale.

3 жыл бұрын

You know there is something that I've noticed about Modern Mary Sue. They're not actually too perfect to be real. If you look at Ana from 50SOG, Gregs(I know each character has it's own name in the Onion trilogy but let's be honest here. It's Onision) Zade, and Empress Theresa they're almost entirely built from flaws and terrible character' traits with very little good in them. They're all self-absorbed in the case of the latter five they're pretty much falling into narcissism and even anti-social personality disorder(Oniboi's characters especially. Jesus are all three of them walking red flags). They judge and look down on other people all the time, wish harm on, or even do harm people especially those they don't like or who dared to criticize them. No matter how valid that criticism may be. They expect things do go their way and come to them easily and whine when they have to do even the slightest bit of work(so they're pretty much lazy). Everyone they don't like is evil in their mind, and they expect the world to love them. Which again, comes back to vanity. But..they(and their authors) have absolutely zero self-awareness and present them as good and perfect. TL;DR: Mary Sue nowadays is an asshole and/or a narcissist, with no redeeming qualities about them whatsoever, but whom narrative(and the characters themselves) insist is this greatest, nicest, and most perfect person in the world. and in the case of quite a few of these character's this kind of behavior and self-image is the same their authors have of themselves. Norman, Lani, and Greg especially, think their books are these masterpieces of the genre of literature in general, and that everyone who criticizes them is a jealous hater and a bad person. When called out they all respond with anger and see themselves as victims. Because they all lack-self awareness and despite being assholes, think they're good people and insist their work is beloved and they have fans. This is scary...both bc of how their art imitates life and bc assholes without self-awareness are scary. And what's actually most terrifying in this particular set of people is that while Lani insists she has fas while she doesn't have them and people actually saw through her...Onision's/Greg actually managed to rally quite a number of fans around him and create what s basically a cult of himself(like really...Mr. Atheist and Reprizon did a four-part video on this and Greg pretty much checked all of the requirements of a cult leader).

@TyStarBlue

3 жыл бұрын

@@ninavale. Interesting that your TL;DR is longer than the actual comment preceding it.

@whyareallmynamestaken1382

3 жыл бұрын

@@ninavale. TLDR of the TLDR: Mary Sue's are mostly rude self inserts with no good qualities and every character in the book is made so they look better

@anname7373

3 жыл бұрын

Mary Sues are characters who's mere existence cause the rules of the world to bend to their will because they're so 'awesome'.

I hate when people use learning disabilities as a quirky character trope it's frustrating especially from normal people because they don't know what it's like, how to write about it or the struggle with social interactions

@ninavale.

3 жыл бұрын

yeah. She makes it like some super ability, where she can do what normies cannot. But when you really have learning difficulty it's...well a difficulty. Teachers, even tho they're trained to know better will treat you like you're either an idiot or lazy or both. Put worse grades on your assignments, as if again you were just lazy. They sometimes even neglect to inform you that you are legible for aids. Like maybe a computer-with no spellcheck or internet ofc- during your finals so your writing is legible. Or that your notebook won't be judged by teachers when you have dysgraphia. Both of which happened to me. I didn't know I could write my finals on a computer until I was in Highschool and I've noticed that I actually did better on those exams and scored higher when I wrote them on a machine vs. handwriting. I could've had it easier before, scored better, and have better grades in previous schools but nobody told me. And some teachers still marked me down bc my handwriting was poor. Even though they were repeatedly shown my diagnosis and recommendations from the experts that diagnosed me. And told me that I can't be graded on my note-taking. Because to acknowledge my disability meant giving me a bit more of their attention and time. And it was too much of a chore for them. The attitude of many was like 'could you try and like...switch your disability off, please?'. I frigging wished all my life I was normal and didn't have my difficulties bc they made school even more hell than it usually is.

@NothingOfNoteToSeeHere

3 жыл бұрын

I hate it when fanfic authors use Dyslexia as excuse to not take criticism. Besides that it would be Dysgraphia in the matter of writing...

@Shapes_Quality_Control

3 жыл бұрын

I don’t want to blame “Rain Man” because that movie’s depiction of a seriously autistic man was quite good but the counting cards scene started the bad trend of “super movie autism.” You can suspend disbelief somewhat when your plot calls for it, but for every “Split” you get a “The Predator.”

@cbplayz2374

3 жыл бұрын

One example of dyslexia actually being used well as a character trait is the Percy Jackson series. It's actually important to the character, it shaped much of his life up to the start of the story, and continues to come into play multiple times throughout the series. You see him start off in a special ed boarding school because of his struggle with maintaining grades, and the resulting outbursts when teachers would give him shit for it. At the start of the first book you see him really buckle down for the one class he actually liked, not because of the subject matter, but because his teacher was the first one to not give up on him, and he didn't want to disappoint someone he looked up to. Not to mention having dyslexia was an important part of his character even outside of school, since all of the judgement and prejudice he received from it made him distrusting and standoffish, which is a *flaw*, and something that he makes a gradual effort to improve throughout his *character arc*, things this writer seems to have zero understanding of.

@abidizzne892

2 жыл бұрын

@@cbplayz2374 also the smart girl who likes to read struggles too with her dyslexia

If it takes a paragraph to explain how to pronounce "Lani", my name requires an PhD thesis LOL

@alexandrosvayakis4195

2 жыл бұрын

Same here if you took my middle names as well.

@thethmooteresa

2 жыл бұрын

Mmhmm, feel yas

@JoPlaysSims

2 жыл бұрын

Is it PA-na-go-sha ?

@RatRatRattyRatRat

2 жыл бұрын

I will read it if you write it.

@SC-kz8pp

2 жыл бұрын

Best comment goes to:

Main character: *starts describing herself* My brain: HI MY NAME IS EBONY DARK'NESS DEMENTIA RAVEN WAY

@christiancolon8748

3 жыл бұрын

Get back, you Porterhead.

@GOFFBITZH666

3 жыл бұрын

STFGU U PREP!!!1!11!!!!

@heavystalin2419

3 жыл бұрын

Hi, my name is Johny, and welcome to Jackass

@lcross796

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds like every Episode story written by a 13 year old

@GOFFBITZH666

3 жыл бұрын

Nyaemal Hrruna ITZ TATA U PREP!!!1!!1!!!

The sad thing is that the idea behind it is actually really solid. An honest-to-God sorceress gets a job as a stage magician and has to use clever tricks and misdirection to hide her secrets not from the audience, but from her crew? That has a ton of potential. Wish that book could've been written by someone halfway competent instead of Lani Sarem.

@Allison-qz5yr

3 жыл бұрын

The Night Circus does this quite well, though the timeline is a tad confusing. Other than that, it's a 10/10.

@anarchomando7707

3 жыл бұрын

So Zatanna zatara

@creed8712

3 жыл бұрын

Zatanna, though I don’t think they ever played with her having to hide the magic much

@anarchomando7707

3 жыл бұрын

@@creed8712 it's more of her wanting to add an extra magical Flair for the end of her shows

@nbv6975

3 жыл бұрын

100% check out The Night Circus, it uses that idea and sooooo much more, super good book with an amazing writing style

I love how the cat immediately left once you picked up the book. She doesn't wanna deal with this shit either lmao.

@lazydelibird

2 жыл бұрын

If the cat were to sit through that, that emotional support animal is gonna need an emotional support animal.

Zade: I saved your life! Sophia: No, you ruined my death! Zade: 👁👄👁

@lunabearsong2043

3 жыл бұрын

Ha! Love The Incredibles!

@RogueAstro85

7 ай бұрын

Funny thing, I watched the Incredibles hundreds of times growing up and I always thought he said "You ruined my bet." I was so confused as to why a man would make a bet that he could jump off a skyscraper

I tried buying this book to rip it apart, but Amazon cancelled it because they couldn’t find it. The universe was clearly trying to save me from my own poor decisions.

@eldritchabomination9726

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah, don't waste your time and money

@StottOnTheDot

3 жыл бұрын

Not worth supporting the author even to spite them.

@itscjrodgers

3 жыл бұрын

Did you try getting a second-hand copy? That's how I got my copy.

@iwakeupandboomimarat

3 жыл бұрын

try to find a second hand copy or a pdf online!! its not worth supporting the author tbh

@chickpea

3 жыл бұрын

Try Thriftbooks! I really like them and it's all second hand

I feel like the author found the Terrible Writing Advice channel and unironically followed it.

@Dreigonix

3 жыл бұрын

Because WE NEED A LOVE TRIANGLE!

@BloodiedDoomguy

3 жыл бұрын

She failed at that too, where is the sponsor from Skillshare? Exactly

@morganhall6459

3 жыл бұрын

Am I the only one who wants to see J. P. Beaubien lose his mind while he dissects HFM?

@Dreigonix

3 жыл бұрын

+Morgan Hall YES. This needs to happen.

@wannabehistorian371

3 жыл бұрын

Morgan Hall YES. SOMEONE GET HIM TO DO THIS.

I like how in the interview, L-Annie describes the book as not 'YA' because the main character is in her twenties...when that has nothing to do with a book qualifying for YA. It just means that the book is suitable for teens, not that the MC is a teen themselves.

@mattc2306

3 жыл бұрын

I've written characters who are teenagers, as well as young adult characters. I don't really worry about describing my work. Partially, because my stuff are mostly from Deviantart or Google Docs, but I'm aware of what I write and not try to worry about genre comparisons.

@peterwindhorst5775

3 жыл бұрын

Wait till the Hollywood focus groups come in and say - "I am sorry, you are not playing Zade, but you can play her mom or something", "the focus group has also decided to make Zade gay, so we are rewriting characters to reflect this," etc. I kill to be a fly on the wall to see her face when she is told that.

@autobotstarscream765

3 жыл бұрын

And the book is suitable for nobody, so it passes the disqualification for YA with flying colors.

@autobotstarscream765

3 жыл бұрын

@@mattc2306 Cool, where do you post your work? Are you Matthew Cool on DA as well?

@mattc2306

3 жыл бұрын

@@autobotstarscream765 Actually, my DA account name is MattC230 and I mostly abandoned the site given its renovations. I have a few stories written on Google Docs, but nothing too concrete.

Zade's last name being Holder makes me think her name during the writing process was "Place Holder" while Sarem hunted for a proper Mary Sue name and the first name was all Sarem changed 😂 you can't tell me the woman who named a magician character "Charles Spellman" has too much subtlety or creativity for that

Well for the record, Stephanie Meyer didnt go around trying to falsify her book sale numbers or plagiarizing other people's artwork =7=. As bad as the book is, it earned its success all on its own. Empress Theresa also didnt do all that and Norman himself drew the cover, even if it is really really bad. The book and the author are obnoxious but never resorted to well....this.

@multilad816

3 жыл бұрын

That's either sad and pathetic or horrifying and eerie

@hollieginoza7935

3 жыл бұрын

Norman wouldn't know how to do it if he managed to think up a scheme like that.

@feedthemeat543f

3 жыл бұрын

Norman is a bit too insistent on the "quality" of his cover to think about stealing one tbh

@a.m.3000

3 жыл бұрын

I think the closest Norman came to anything like Sarem's falsified book sales is that he created ANOTHER Amazon listing for Empress Theresa as a way of trying to skirt around bad ratings. Several reviewers caught on, of course, and the listing was taken down.

@agilroy2226

3 жыл бұрын

Lani also misspells Stephenie Meyer's name. twice

A silver lining within this pandemic: seeing KrimsonRogue become the Rapunzel he is always destined to be

The fact that Zade/Sarem brings up dyslexia as a trait of being a witch feels like just one of many grabs at being the next Percy Jackson

She’s not just a Mary Sue, she’s an _archetypal_ Mary Sue. She’s extremely close to Mary Sue, the actual character.

Hilariously enough, some copies of this book literally have the sticker, "#1 New York Times Best Seller for 23 Hours"

@skeletonwar4445

3 жыл бұрын

lmao ngl that's a great sticker

@SergioLeonardoCornejo

3 жыл бұрын

Having any NYT best seller label feels like a shameful thing at this point tbh.

@pluto3194

3 жыл бұрын

It's in the video at 4:26 too!

"It's an honor to be taken off the list. I'm the only one i'm like a rebel" Isn't that like a scientist saying that they were the only ones who got their noble peace prize revoked? Or if someone's trying to get you to hire them and their selling point is that they were the only ones fired from their last job for embezzling? Or if a pizza place said that they're the only place in the area that got bumped down from a Health rating of 90 to a Health rating of 10? Those aren't good things. They just make you seem all the worse. And then people start asking "why did your prize get revoked? Why were you fired? Why is the health score so low? What did you do that made them remove your book?"

@gokuxsephiroth4505

3 жыл бұрын

She and "Dr" Wakefield can go celebrate together in a corner somewhere: "Yeaaaaaahhhh, we suck! Now which one of us did more damage to our own reputations with our terribleness?"

@sugarveins

3 жыл бұрын

i honestly have a feeling she only said that to save face, she's definitely butthurt about it, you can see it in her eyes.

@trygveplaustrum4634

3 жыл бұрын

Scientists don't usually get Nobel *PEACE* prizes, but I get your point!

@Enzaio

3 жыл бұрын

@@trygveplaustrum4634 That's why it would make sense if it got revoked, actually.

@k.morningstar7983

2 жыл бұрын

the twit whose bad science published in *The Lancet* who started the modern fear of immunizations causing autism being proud of it would be fitting

Sarem: "Life is short." **Proceeds to hold everyone hostage with unending rambling.**

@SorowFame

3 жыл бұрын

Maybe she gains life for every moment she wastes of someone else's and this is all just her bid for immortality.

@cam4636

2 жыл бұрын

@@SorowFame She's not just a witch and the chosen one and the long-lost daughter of a famous magician, she's ALSO a vampire!

@lazydelibird

2 жыл бұрын

There's no audience quite like a captive audience?

"It's technically not a YA book, if you ask someone who's very in the book world, because nobody should be reading this, not even young adults."

The whole dyslexia thing annoys me as a person with dyslexia. “That’s not how dyslexia works” indeed. I have never written anything backwards and know nobody else who has. Even when this girl has flaws, her flaws have that “not like other girls” flavour. Edit: When I said I know nobody else who has written backwards either, I meant I know no other dyslexics who do it. I know some left handed people do it (my father is left handed and he’s done it). Sorry if I wasn’t clear.

@themysteriousmista4922

3 жыл бұрын

I some times get 'who' and 'how' mixed up and misreading a lot of things.

@jessicamarshall1975

3 жыл бұрын

The Mysterious Mista I get there, their and they’re mixed up and I have really bad spelling.

@themysteriousmista4922

3 жыл бұрын

@@jessicamarshall1975 same, I've gotten better with English but not so much my native language.

@corathestoryteller

3 жыл бұрын

I write okay, getting better at it, but when reading something I'll mistake times for ten, put a word where it wasn't originally, swear up and down that the sentence started with "The" or "And" the first three times and around the fourth time, seeing it gone. It's really irritating. Im smart, just not when I'm reading outloud. And simple math I'm a little slower at recognizing the numbers

@sixrabbits3972

3 жыл бұрын

Right? I also have dyslexia, I never wrote backwards but had the damndest time figuring out how to write q (seriously, b,d,q,p it's freaking stick with a ball!) I don't think this author had the first clue how dyslexia actually works.

The throne is almost as glorious as those locks^^

@MagpieDynamics

3 жыл бұрын

He’s like the God Emperor of Terrible Literature.

@kainbellejangles

3 жыл бұрын

They are thoroughly lovely locks

@maymay5600

3 жыл бұрын

imagine moving day or he has to minimize the throne for new books, that's gotta be a big ass box

"what are you doing" "i need you to go" "why are you like this"

"I will smack you with a book" Aight, reasonable response "And if you only publish an e-book ill hit you with a computer" HOL' UP

@loturzelrestaurant

3 жыл бұрын

Self-Insert is at least Objectively Wrong in Manga though: It has caused some of the most insane Failures in that Genre of Literature.

@arrow_of_ravenclaw5155

3 жыл бұрын

I’d smack them with a book then ice the book. It was innocent and didn’t deserve that

@deathkorpsofkriegguardsmen8488

2 жыл бұрын

If it’s published on a tank he will hit you with a tank. Same goes for plane,Gun,bayonet, and tree

@justanotheranimeprofilepic

8 ай бұрын

Excuse while I print only in paperback

"Yes, the most useful aspects of men: Putting up tents." Well, depends on where you're putting the pole

@dirkjehovah4731

3 жыл бұрын

Yonatan Yonatano *careless whisper begins playing*

@dylanchouinard6141

3 жыл бұрын

Heyoo!

@eldritchabomination9726

3 жыл бұрын

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

@anarchomando7707

3 жыл бұрын

@@eldritchabomination9726 how the hell do you type that face

@eldritchabomination9726

3 жыл бұрын

@@anarchomando7707 just look up "lenny face" copy and paste.

PLEASE everyone go find Caleb Joseph's "I wrote handbook for mortals 2" video because it is honestly a perfect sequel to HFM and had me fully rolling

@melissavancoppenhagen3756

3 жыл бұрын

It watched it, and it honestly could have been the actual sequel 🤣. He did a great job

@adrianinha19

3 жыл бұрын

I actally listen to it on a regular basis! It cracks me up everytime, that and the original review

@loverboymadita7811

3 жыл бұрын

Yeeeeessss!!!! Caleb's video is hilarious!!! Lowkey I wouldn't mind seeing Krimson react to it after finishing the actual book

@peppydogdog12

3 жыл бұрын

definitely doing it later

@maisie4598

3 жыл бұрын

Was just about to comment this too! Krimson should definitely react to it after this 😄

Love to see adults writing the way I did at thirteen when I could barely speak English. It's so good for my self esteem.

Handbook for Mortals is what happens when a G-list celebrity manager falsely believes that they have enough connections to cheat their way into a best-selling book and a movie deal, with all of the misplaced self-confidence and/or ego that follows from that.

On the topic of Scheherazade, pronounced Sheh-her-uh-zaad, is the name of the Arabic queen from One Thousand and One Nights. It also means "World-freer", so it seems to be a horrible attempt at linking our self insert mary sue to a revered figure. It could also be a sorry reference to the queen's legendary story-telling/survival skills, as she uses her wit to survive the thousand nights.

@mercurywise4047

3 жыл бұрын

LITEMITAN all that time on pronunciation and we still have zade when it should be zaad? I wish I was surprised

@androidinblack5291

3 жыл бұрын

Crispy Win I’m a native Arabic speaker, can confirm we also pronounce it as “Zaad”.

@ninavale.

3 жыл бұрын

Methinks it's second mostly. Since Lanieuo later in book states her mother is a great storyteller that when she told the story of how her and Charles met he was sucked in as much as Mac. Even tho he obviously knew the story. And then Labi gives us the story. So she is complimenting herself on how emersing it is. Spoiler. it's not. Also Krim didn't touch upon it but other reviews did(like Jenny Trout and Blandbook for Cholrtels). Zanei finds Sherezade's story romantic. Not the tales she spins but the framing device. Bc you know. Having to think up stories on fly bc your husband will behead you in the morning, bc his ex cheated on him so that means all women on earth deserve death is epitome of dream romance.

@nancyjay790

3 жыл бұрын

As an aside, I had a friend who wanted to name a future daughter Scherazade. To discourage him, when my husband and I acquired a kitten, we named her Scherazade. A few weeks of us calling the kitten for supper knocked that idea right out of his head.

@masondang8161

3 жыл бұрын

I knew that name from Starkid's musical "Twisted" and I feel actual pain seeing that name being used for a Mary Sue

I think "chunky pieces" is supposed to mean that her hair is cut in chunky layers, which are just big, visible layers of hair, but... "chunky pieces" isn't a good way of phrasing it.

@srbrant5391

3 жыл бұрын

“Chunky pieces” brings to mind kitty litter.

@bonniea8189

3 жыл бұрын

I thought she meant the color. Like balayage done wrong

@jamescam04

3 жыл бұрын

“Chunky pieces” sounds like petfood - *catfood* , maybe.

@seraxx1973

3 жыл бұрын

That sounds like what she’d probably been going for, but at best it sounds like Zade’s let a kid at her with a pair of scissors and at worst, like bits of vomit are stuck in it or something.

"Doors are in twenty minutes." "Hot damn, I thought those guys broke up decades ago!" There Lani, I wrote your Doors joke for you.

@Lucifersfursona

Жыл бұрын

This is already fantastic but it can be read in Jenny Nicholson’s voice for free serotonin

@justanotheranimeprofilepic

8 ай бұрын

"Doors are in 20 minutes" "Didn't think we could afford such a good opening act"

i like to think krimson is just samson but with an english degree his hair grows long and his patience for bad books grows with it

Book throne - check Cat - check Perfect hair - check This is gonna be good video.

@boomstickmick5652

3 жыл бұрын

MERMAIDER MERMAIDER MERMAIDER MERMAIDER

Normal person: *celebrates Independence Day by lighting fireworks* Krimson: *toils through a bad book and uploads a review at 3AM Pacific*

KrimsonRogue: "What are you doing I need to film." Also KrimsonRogue: *Aggressively and lovingly scratches cat's head*

@Firefly07

2 жыл бұрын

Me: Cat you are ugly and fat and gross and I don’t like you Also me: *rocks cat in my arms and fluffs his belly as he purrs at 1,000 hertz*

Her mentioning dyslexia and then inexplicably fixing it in only a few years, reminds me of a manuscript I read where a character had an asthma attack and his friend told him to "just breathe" and then he was fine. I've noticed authors mention these sorts of things to either make their characters/book impossible to criticize or to artificially give their otherwise perfect character a "flaw."

@peepopopo7140

8 ай бұрын

Hey, i know its been a year, but as an asthmatic person myself, I just wanted to say, "what the fuck?!?!"

@elainagilbert7663

8 ай бұрын

I hope this was in response to my story and not because you might've interpreted it to mean asthmatics are flawed.@@peepopopo7140

@spacebassist

5 ай бұрын

@@peepopopo7140 did you breathe before saying it?

This book is just a rich, connected, person complaining about how they just want to be “normal” while also talking about how amazing they are.

@loturzelrestaurant

3 жыл бұрын

Talking about Boring Parents... Clark Kents Parents were Badasses, especially the Father, though. Talking about Power-Systems though: 'Nen' from "HunterxHunter" is the arguably Best; so check it out and make your own Ability-Set regarding it, will ya? Honestly, Krimson Rogue himself should do that.

You see, chapter 0’s title is actually referring to the person who decided to read the book

The urge to rewrite the book as a story abt the theatre crew saving Mac and Jackson from Zades weird witch pheromones and kicking out Spellman for preying on younger less experienced girls like Sophia and having the team be a family is strong in me

@pikapower_kirby

2 жыл бұрын

I'd read that. Reminds me of how I want to write Empress Theresa from Hal's perspective, where Theresa is controlling and ignores Hal's concerns and wishes in favor of her own mad quest for power and attention.

@HappyBirddi

2 жыл бұрын

Please do both of those thing and take all my money XDXDXDXD I honestly have the urge to do the same

@justin2308

2 жыл бұрын

@@pikapower_kirby Funny you should say that: I actually had an idea to write a version of the story from her husband’s perspective where he pretty much corrects all her BS- well, either that or Hal is a leech that causes Theresa to lose both her mind and her mobility. We should both try to write our versions. 😂

@pikapower_kirby

2 жыл бұрын

@@justin2308 Let's do it!

@ichimatsu13

2 жыл бұрын

I'm sending you both my energy

A 60yo, button-collecting retiree named Esther could be an interesting protagonist.

@justanotheranimeprofilepic

8 ай бұрын

I can imagine a sweet old woman becoming the protagonist reluctantly

She's still trying to sell these bulk bought books to this day. I see her at the Las Vegas Ren Faire every year with an enormous pile of these things.

@iwakeupandboomimarat

3 жыл бұрын

oh my god thats AMAZING

@jge8144

3 жыл бұрын

How the heck did she have enough money to even buy her books in bulk?!

@iwakeupandboomimarat

3 жыл бұрын

@@jge8144 im guessing it was her publishing company, maybe the books shes selling at cons/faires are the ones that were ordered to get her on the bestseller list?

@andrester88

3 жыл бұрын

She's at the Ren Faire?

@theotherghostgirl337

3 жыл бұрын

I miss the ren faire

there's a line between writing style and bad writing, and this book not only crosses this line but kills it and dances on its corpse

@Lulu-ze3hq

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah i LOVE stream of consciousness when it provides confusion and makes you fell overwhelmed with the main character. Fahrenheit 451 is a good example, I fell disoriented and suspicious with the protagonist, but people love to abuse this style and make it boring and drawn out.

So the MC is the author's self insert, the singer guy is based on a person she actually used to manage, and these characters are in a love triangle? She's writing fanfic about herself and a self shipper. Normally nothing wrong with that, except here it's based on a real person and that crosses so many boundaries.

@AleTitan

2 жыл бұрын

Not to mention she published it with her own name attached to it. At least on fanfics on the internet, it's anonymous

@cyanidesmile7263

2 жыл бұрын

@@AleTitan I don't even care about the self insert or fanfic part, it's the part where one of them is based on a real person! So, so, so many boundaries have been crossed. Like, do what you want with cartoons and OCs, who cares? But there's lines, man!

@justanotheranimeprofilepic

8 ай бұрын

​@@cyanidesmile7263especially that she herself admits who the character is based on. Thank God this book has no audience or the guy would be hounded

@REDACTEDbox

4 ай бұрын

Self ship fan fiction with a real guy who hates her. Sounds fun

For those who care about the order of the Arcana: 0 - Fool 1 - Magician 2 - Priestess 3 - Empress 4 - Emperor 5 - Hierophant 6 - Lovers 7 - Chariot 8 - Justice 9 - Hermit 10 - Wheel of Fortune 11 - Strength 12 - Hanged Man 13 - Death 14 - Temperance 15 - Devil 16 - Tower 17 - Star 18 - Moon 19 - Sun 20 - Judgement 21 - World

@punchyboi6915

Жыл бұрын

I see arcana I hear jojo

@gregjayonnaise8314

Жыл бұрын

@@punchyboi6915 za warudo

@Nzosaba_Matenge

Жыл бұрын

The fool is also 22

@littlekuribohimposte

Жыл бұрын

@@Nzosaba_Matenge I can see that, since asI'mfamiliar with the chards, they all are notated with roman numerals except the Fool, which has the arabic number 0.

@codexstudios

10 ай бұрын

I love Get To The Orange Door!

Big pet peeve here: Sarem keeps hammering down how Zade's name is pronounced, that it's like "zay-d". Then she says it's short for Scherezade. Problem is, the "zade" in Scherezade is pronounced like "zar-d". So we have an author who gets so offended when people can't pronounce her "oh-so-special" name, who writes a character who also gets miffed when people can't pronounce her super-special name, and then the author fucks up the pronounciation of the character's full name!

@sharonspears-mandeville2369

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly,my dear person of the interwebs. Just imagine if this chick actually existed,and told you both her real name AND/OR nickname..I'd be like: "Um,excuse me lady? I mean,other _than the fact you've got a..really interesting name,but..I'd hate to ask you this-But was and/or were your mother and/or parents on some seriously weird shit/on some serious drugs when they named you at birth..? Because-no offence and all,to be fair-um,what kind of parent would consider that name for a child,let alone someone like you,honestly..? No offence here,but STILL!?!"_

@agilroy2226

3 жыл бұрын

In the book Zade goes, "I hate it when people pronounce my name like ZOD, like I'm a superman villain." And then like three chapters later you find out what her full name is. So Lani fully admits it's supposed to be Zhad, but just chooses the different pronunciation cause... it sounds cooler to her i guess.

@anapm2927

3 жыл бұрын

I imagine the writer has not interacted with or known any Turkish person.. Ever

@plant707

3 жыл бұрын

Makes it even more funny, because Lani, as in the Hawaiian name, is pronounced LAH-nee, not L-Annie. Idk, as someone with a name that's hard to pronounce for native English speakers, I do not expect anyone to immediately master it lol. Nor am I ever annoyed by it. If your name is pronounced differently from the usual version (like Scheherezayd and Lannie) and someone doesn't get it right, just correct them and move on. It's such a weird thing to be offended about.

@agilroy2226

3 жыл бұрын

@@plant707 Hawaii is my home state and yeah, if I see "Lani" I pronounce it the same way I would as Liliuokalani. It's the difference between stress and unstressed, but Sarem is SO offended by this she has to put like three different instances of pronunciation in the book. My name has eight letters and four syllables, it gets mispronounced ALL the time, but I am certainly not writing shitty YA novels to rectify that.

The whole tarot thing pissed me off. Those aren't what the cards mean. At all. So it doesn't even work if the reader is familiar with tarot either

@lasura

3 жыл бұрын

What do you mean? Tarot cards originated from gaming cards where the Major Arcana were the trumps each numbered from 1 to 21 with the Fool as the zero. Of course it's less interesting than the Tarot reading interpretations but it's not exactly wrong. You could still use modern cards for a game.

@jasonellis4330

3 жыл бұрын

@@lasura I was talking about the reading that the character did, not the number system...

@jasonellis4330

3 жыл бұрын

@ Death just means new beginnings though...

@lasura

3 жыл бұрын

@@jasonellis4330 yeah I saved half the video for the morning and saw that today 😂 oh jeez I really hoped an actual reading wouldn't be in there

@SergioLeonardoCornejo

3 жыл бұрын

The only way it could make sense is as a JoJo reference. ZA WARUDO!

The throne of books, the perfect hair and the cat curled up on his lap gives me villain vibes, not gonna lie.

You know, Madoka Kaname literally becomes a god at the end of her series and she's still significantly less OP than Zade. Also there's way less interesting thematic stuff about Homura creating her own Audie Murphy out of a teenage girl's corpse and obsession.

@Koffiee

3 жыл бұрын

Another PMMM fan!!! :D

@beefcakesmchunkerson9079

3 жыл бұрын

The thing about Madoka: the entire show she’s weak and helpless and basically protected. Zade is just....hghgh

@cam4636

2 жыл бұрын

@@beefcakesmchunkerson9079 I'd say the thing about Madoka is she's actually dealing with problems beyond what any normal person could handle and the stakes are huge, so her power-up feels necessary while also fitting the basic rules of the world. Zade is just, hghghgh

@beefcakesmchunkerson9079

2 жыл бұрын

@@cam4636 agreed

@gracekim25

2 жыл бұрын

I need to finish that anime😅

You know what I'd love to read? An adventure book featuring a married couple. A good healthy married couple who loves and supports each other yet gets annoyed and sassess each other. Give me the banter, give me the sass, give me the loyal love and strong relationship that doesn't fall apart during the story. Please just give me a good married couple adventure.

@dee_is_tired

3 жыл бұрын

I didn't read it but isn't that basically what The Buried Giant is?

@mintytrifecta5504

3 жыл бұрын

@@dee_is_tired I am checking what that is Right Now

@gliscorpropagandaaccount1764

3 жыл бұрын

I can think of a few series with happy married couple side characters

@em84c

3 жыл бұрын

JD Robb In Death series has a great married couple. But it's not adventure. The main character (the female) is a homicide detective and it's set like 50 years in the future which is cool. There are resorts on other planets, virtual reality and hover cars and stuff.

@imogenhope8949

3 жыл бұрын

I know that you asked for a book, but the mummy film series is exactly that

Can I just say, the thing about 'love triangles' that always confused me, is that when they're brought up they're usually presented as a romantic involvement of one person with two people. The thing about that, though, is that from my perspective a triangle doesn't work that way. It sounds more like a line geometrically. A triangle's vertices have two lines each, so you'd think for it to be a love *triangle* you'd need each of the three people to be interested in the other two, so then all the points would be connected.

@georgethompson913

3 жыл бұрын

The circle of sexual frustration

@Enoemen

3 жыл бұрын

You could argue that usually the two people in love with the one person are connected through hatred or a feeling of rivalry. But yeah, it's mostly an easy way to sell 'Team Edward,' or 'Team Jacob' shirts. Capitalism, yo.

@phenjaws569

3 жыл бұрын

Twelfth Night by Shakespeare is the only genuine love triangle I've seen

@silvermagpie1071

3 жыл бұрын

It's more of a V in most literature

@roshpotter06

3 жыл бұрын

@@silvermagpie1071 'love V' doesn't have the same ring, though, which is a pity.

I actually had the idea to give Sofia a happy ending by having her stay resentful of the main character, then one day she somehow realizes that she’s a fictional character and finds a portal to go hang out with other fictional characters from other universes. She learns the nature of a Mary Sue (realizing that her resentment was actually a huge red flag to the fact that she’d been cast as the villain in a protagonist-centered-morality-type story) and, figuring that the lot NEARLY killing her might be a prelude to the plot ACTUALLY killing her, she hatches a plan to hitch a ride to another story with a nice, caring guy who isn’t a womanizing prat. I know I probably can’t call it “Handbook for Fictional Characters,” but I might still write it anyway 😆

One of the reasons the Fruits Basket love triangle works is because the person at the center is so inherently beloved. Kyo and Yuki's characterizations are so important, but before we understand them, we need a reason to care. That reason to care comes in the form of a sad girl who devalues herself so much she's voluntarily homeless and has so much love to spare for other people. We want to see her succeed and be happy. This is where Kyo and Yuki's characterization becomes important; now that we want the best for her, the love interests have to shine so we can decide whose best for her. The narrative has to make them compete for us ad much as they're competing for Honda. Who is essentially the audience bae at this point and must protecc. Which creates tension, intrigue, and audience investment. If you want me to care about the love triangle, I need to care about the person being chased. Otherwise, you can have the greatest of all Love Interests, but I'll care more about the chasers individually than I will about the doki doki wifeu subplot. ...tdlr; I love Kyo but if he ever makes her sad again I will skin his orange cat ass

wait a damn minute krim u cant just gloss over jasper being in a band and his manager simping so hard she puts him in her book i'm genuinely Shaken

@johannesseyfried7933

3 жыл бұрын

I wasn't aware that simping is something that Women do as well.

@LiamNajor

3 жыл бұрын

@@johannesseyfried7933 you learn new things every day, weather you know it or not. Your brain is always absorbing as much information as possible.

@crowthewicked8344

3 жыл бұрын

@@johannesseyfried7933 In this context, it's Sucker Idolizing Mediocre Penis. Examples: Helga from Hey Arnold, Yuno from Future Diary, really any Yandere

@firmanchristiansianturi4794

3 жыл бұрын

@@crowthewicked8344 Arnold is not mediocre

@crowthewicked8344

3 жыл бұрын

@@firmanchristiansianturi4794 Its just a label that defines the one who's lusting for them.

Could you image if Sarem took the "loved by everyone" trope and turned it into a reverse "yandere" scenerio? Everybody loves you so much that they would kill for you, possibly kill you, definitely try to come onto you. It would have made for better conflicts, I think. Like Future Diary, but anyone could be Yuno.

@autobotstarscream765

3 жыл бұрын

I've thought about how a deconstruction of "desired by everyone" would be about the character living with a permanent target on her/his back, living as prey and constantly on the run from potential attackers looking to abuse them.

@ratgirl4626

3 жыл бұрын

that'd be really cool. sort of like what happens in junji ito's horror manga "tomie," where people are so compelled by tomie's beauty that they actually cut her up. (spoilers.)

@theskepticpirate156

3 жыл бұрын

Here's the problem with that story concept: that would actually be interesting and engaging.

@greatandmightykevin

3 жыл бұрын

@@autobotstarscream765 holy shit and then the whole thing with the cover would kind of make a little bit of sense

@caoilfhionndunbar

3 жыл бұрын

thats the backstory of C.C. in Code Geass

Oh man do I have a story for you. LOL. Okay so. I was at a con. Wizard world. (Won't say where) but the author of this book was at a table by her lonesome and i was like "meh im bored might as well" bc thats how I am at cons. So I met her. She was super nice and surprised I was coming up to her. Now, I have NOOOO idea about the controversy. I didnt know what a booktube was up until two years ago.... and I haven't kept up with YA fiction since I was a young adult... so She was like "can I get a pic for my IG?" I was like "heck yeah" and then I bought a book for my roommate and she signed it. Im on my train back home and I was looking through my haul and decided to look up the book on Google. 😂😂 absolute MAYHEM. All this stuff about how she bought her number 1. How this is the worst book ever, and how anybody who reads it and enjoys is dumber than a doorknob. Needless to say, I was shocked lmbooooooo I gave it to my roommate and never told her the controversy surrounding it. she has never cracked it open and probably never will. The best thing about this book is that everyone has a story with it, not even realizing it.

@HappyBirddi

2 жыл бұрын

Omg that's amazing XD

@gracekim25

Жыл бұрын

Wow

since I have too much time, lemme interpret what her card combination at 1:05:58 would actually mean to a tarot reader. King of wands means Jackson is a practical, fiery guy. Not particularly sentimental, but very driven, in general. 8 of wands would mean something that comes by very fast, and also goes by very fast. The three of pentacles means a work group, and the three of cups can mean a love triangle, or the presence of a third person on a relationship. The sun usually represents joy and happiness, but can also be associated with childishness. Paired with the five of pentacles at the end, which mean loss, more specifically focusing more on a loss than on what you still have left, paired with the mostly lack of cups (feelings) on Jackson's part, he's very attracted to her physically, but not emotionally, and he's interested in the physical stuff, but that's it. Once he gets that, he's going to leave her with her empty cups. The 9 of cups at the end means she's going to be fine in the long run. That man ain't worth it sis lmao Not exactly how she interpreted it. And there's no hidden meaning in that. It's literally an irrelevant fling that she's gonna get upset over when he leaves, but overall will get thru. If she wanted this reading to have a "hidden meaning" she should have bombarded it with ominous major arcana cards. That would probably indicate something else was going on. A bunch of minor arcana and the sun is the most run of the mill love reading ever. edit: how hilarious this reading is seeing how Jackson is being portrayed in the book lol

@ninavale.

3 жыл бұрын

That's not the best part. Before Jackson's spread her cards are: Priestess-Chariot-Fool-Magician-Devil-Lovers(in this order if I recall) Her read on Mac contains ace of cups, two of cups, ten of pentacles, four of wands, ten of cups, the wheel of fortune, the eight of swords, the queen of cups, and the king of cups. The last three cards in this whole reading...ones regarding her future(not I think really tied to future with Mac but overall) are in following order:Tower-Death-The World. and like I know Death doesn't always mean negative things...but the general meaning of Tower(which she didn't say was reversed so...it's probably upright) is rather negative bc the car represents sudden and drastic change. Like one that will tear everything apart. I'm not a Tarot expert but combined with death which also means change, and world which also means change, all three cards foretell well....change of fortune. and since Zade's life at this point is perfect then said the change of fortune doesn't sound too positive to me.

The last time I was this early Empress Theresa was still falling from the sky with a trash bag full of soda bottles

@chrissyevans2017

3 жыл бұрын

Underrated comment

@nancyjay790

3 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣

The 9 dislikes are from Sarem and 8 of her alt accounts.

@allhailthecartlord7256

3 жыл бұрын

Real talk they might just be from people who don't like hearing about shitty books

Ok, I wasn't going to comment but then as I was watching GenerallyPooky's vids on the book something struck me as odd about the chapter titles. I've been reading Tarot for over 5 years at this point and the Major Arcana (the first 22 cards, numbered 0-21) is the most significant of the deck because they are the heart of the deck. The order of the cards is very important, the Major Arcana tells a story, basically. Or aspects of a story or lessons that need to be learned. It begins with the Fool which is new beginnings and ends with the World, representing life coming full circle and encompassing all. The reason I feel this must be commented upon is that Lani Sarem didn't keep the Major Arcana in order for her chapter titles. Which is fine in a sense, they wouldn't be in order in a reading. But she diverges from their order just enough to be frustrating. It almost seems pointless to use them as chapter titles if the order is going to be just wonky enough to not make sense. As a writer and a tarot card reader, an author using the cards as titles and connecting the contents of the chapter to the card would be really interesting. But Sarem doesn't do that, it feels like she just did it to be cool and not like other girls than actually using the significance of the cards.

@banjofangirl3458

3 жыл бұрын

A very much irrelevant question, but how would you feel about people getting into tarot exclusively from jojo?

@sagathestoryteller7920

3 жыл бұрын

@@banjofangirl3458 However someone finds tarot and wishes to use it is up to them. Honestly I love that popular media is exposing people to the fortune telling tool. I would just say to remember to use it respectfully for the tool in general. But at the end of the day, it's your life and as long as you aren't using them for malicious intent, you're doing good.

@gokuxsephiroth4505

3 жыл бұрын

She didn't even connect the chapters to the tarot cards in any way... Not to their symbolic meanings, not to the physical objects after which they're named- nothing! I'm just getting into it (Still got a thicc book across my lap when I read lmao) and I'm itching in frustration over here.

@tivvy2vs21

2 жыл бұрын

@@sagathestoryteller7920 I just know them from Isaac, and repentance added the reverse card which is cool

@Pandachu123

2 жыл бұрын

I learned about the Arcana thanks to Persona 3. I did a lot of research on it, too. But I have a question... If I were to make a character that used magic themed around the Arcana, what do you think would it be like? (It's for a Black Clover character, by the way.)

Maaaan, “the first breath you take after holding it underwater for as long as you can” is such gorgeous, vivid imagery - it’s a shame it doesn’t actually fit the circumstances

*sees the number of tabs* Oh, we're in for a treat. Edit: For some reason, the thing that pisses me off most about this book is the tarot card chapters. Like, that's such a cool idea and it's wasted on this crap.

@Rivenlore99

3 жыл бұрын

musicgal365 So True. The chapter titles don’t make sense

@billygleim4641

3 жыл бұрын

Yep, if your gonna name a chapter "the moom" you need there to be somesort of lie, or betrayal, or something but NOPE, JUST USE IT BECAUSE NIGHT SKY PRETTY.

@lasura

3 жыл бұрын

It sounds like the most unoriginal idea to me. I was considering it and thought "I'm sure that's been done a number of times, nah". There's at least one album where each song is named after a card (or three) too! (Tarot by Æther Realms, definitely recommend if into metal)

@ghostoflazlo

3 жыл бұрын

@@billygleim4641 "moom" 😂😂

Fun Fact: Jackson Rathbone was also Sokka in M. Night Syamalamadingdong's Disaster-Opus "The Last Airbender".

@FullMetalWhovian81

3 жыл бұрын

M. Night Syamalamadingdong 🤣🤣🤣

@NapaCat

3 жыл бұрын

You mean Souka. He traveled with Aung and Katara.

@Tamaki742

3 жыл бұрын

@@NapaCat *saitama face* Sou ka?

@ViewingChaos

3 жыл бұрын

There is no movie in Ba Sing Se...

@TheActualMarcy

3 жыл бұрын

What ATLA movie? There is no ATLA movie.

The main characters real name is actually really famous, it’s even appeared in a song “well alibaba had them 40 thieves, sheherezade had a thousand tales~”

@Tareltonlives

3 жыл бұрын

That would explain why pronunciation is a problem in the first place: this book has the eɪ, while the original name has the ɑː

I have a character named Oisín. It's a traditional Irish name, character's Irish - tbc from Ireland. I explain the pronunciation in two lines. "Oy-sin?" The man regarded Oisín with a bemused expression. "That's an odd name..." "It's pronounced oh-sheen, not oy-sin. It's Irish." Oisín sighed. _Bloody tans_ There. That's it. No need to dedicate a drawn out paragraph to it. It's not that hard. Do it the way it would happen in real life. [Sorry for those that don't know: tan(s) is a derogatory term (punching up not down tho) that the Irish use to refer to the British, mainly the English rather than the Scottish, Welsh, etc. tho. The man Oisín was talking to was an Englishman, so.]

@loturzelrestaurant

3 жыл бұрын

Talking about Boring Parents... Clark Kents Parents were Badasses, especially the Father, though. Talking about Power-Systems though: 'Nen' from "HunterxHunter" is the arguably Best; so check it out and make your own Ability-Set regarding it, will ya? Honestly, Krimson Rogue hopefully reads and even answers this comment.

@annijaklamer

3 жыл бұрын

I have a rare/weird name irl and I like to give my characters one, too. Usually, as in real life, it can be solved in two lines. Any more is just melodramatic.

@Vooman

3 жыл бұрын

oisin man, take me by the hand lead me to the land that you understand

@Dreigonix

2 жыл бұрын

@@theshamurai5767 HELL YEAH

@justin2308

2 жыл бұрын

That actually reminds me of how I named my main character in my first book idea too. Man, good times, good times...

As someone who constantly has their name mispronounced, Lani's really stretching the bill. Personally I don't care to correct unless I'll be interacting with them frequently.

@infiniteshay8660

3 жыл бұрын

Is it see-air-uh or ki-ar-uh? I'm leaning on the former but knowing my luck it'll be neither.

@jamesm.zippay8867

3 жыл бұрын

@@infiniteshay8660 I bet it's pronounced like Joseph.

@bellarkcox1243

3 жыл бұрын

I never give anyone my full name because despite it being the easiest name ever, everyone mispronounces it. Nicknames are a blessing.

@infiniteshay8660

3 жыл бұрын

@@bellarkcox1243 Yeah I'm lucky my name is two English words smacked together so it can never be mispronounced.

@m_e_nere

3 жыл бұрын

My name is Melchizedek so almost everyone new I've meant has mispronounced (or misspelled) my name

Scheherazade is actually pronounced sha-hair-ah-zahd. So... Zahd is probably how Zade should be pronounced. But yeah, this book is trash.

@kees_hoe

3 жыл бұрын

Lani herself has actually pronounced it “Zade” in interviews. I think just cuz it’s a nickname it sounds different, like how someone called Matthew is nicknamed “Matt” you don’t pronounce Matthew “MattHue” you pronounce it “Math ew” but the nickname isn’t Math.

@skeletonwar4445

3 жыл бұрын

@@kees_hoe Another possile explanation is that Lani has no fucking clue

@RainbowAnimeCupcake

3 жыл бұрын

I had to pause the video when that came up, like really? Of all the undeserving names for her sorceress character lani picked fuckin Scheherazade? I was dumbstruck

@sickcrabfactz

3 жыл бұрын

she definitely just picked it from some "cool witch names for girls" list because she clearly doesn't know its origin lmaoo

@PhantomSkitty

3 жыл бұрын

@@kees_hoe Okay, valid.

A rare case in which you _can_ judge a book by it's cover.

Just gonna drop this here: My friend and I have used the idea of "Las Vegas magician, but they're actually a literal sorcerer who uses their supreme magical ability to bend reality to their will to pretend to be good at fake magic, to get out of having to practice sleight of hand" as a dumbfuck gag in a book that's actively trying to be as stupid as humanly possible, all the time. It's honestly kind of surreal to see somebody unironically use an idea, completely in earnest, that we put into a book where the bad guy's evil plan is to take over the country by cloning a bunch of Count Draculas, and then registering them all to vote and pandering to their interests (like pledging to make the sale of garlic illegal and opening up access to blood banks), and he is ultimately defeated when the protagonist stuffs him into an envelope and mails him to the center of the Earth. Maybe it's not a good thing to play an idea straight from a book who's stated objective is to be "so brazenly and unapolagetically stupid, it loops around to being a strange kind of majestic, like a submarine stranded in the desert".

@mrcephalopod

Жыл бұрын

Honestly, that sounds like the kind of book I'd unironically love to read, Count Dracula election fraud sounds like such a fun concept

@mrcephalopod

Жыл бұрын

Honestly, that sounds like the kind of book I'd unironically love to read, Count Dracula election fraud sounds like such a fun concept

@NoOne-jx6hw

Жыл бұрын

What the hell is this story called? I need this in my life!

@shrimp.trap3

6 ай бұрын

losing my mind at the concept of mailing someone to the center of the earth

Empress Teresa and Zade: *Meet* Me: Let them fight...

@dylanchouinard6141

3 жыл бұрын

Whoever wins, we lose

@aceinspaces

3 жыл бұрын

Why would they fight? They're basically the same person

@TheFoolishSamurai

3 жыл бұрын

Onision tags in and takes Zade's place in the ring

@odd-eyes9463

3 жыл бұрын

And feed them cake.

@GOFFBITZH666

3 жыл бұрын

LEMME FITE DA BIITCHJES!!!!1!1!1!!!

Something I appreciate about Krimson over, say, Dominic Noble, is that when Krimson critiques a trope, writing convention, or just a pet peeve, he goes into why he doesn't like it and why it's not appropriate for the book itself and not why it's "just bad and you should never do it." Don't get me wrong, Dominic Noble does great work and he's more focused on adaptations versus straight book reviews, but I watched the Live Stream of "The Mister" and some of Dom's critiques felt like REALLY bad advice for a beginning author to hear and made me feel bad about similar tropes in my writing. Krimson can totally get into bloodsports and just tear a book apart like with "Empress Theresa," but I never get that same sense of "condemn all books that do this" like I did from Dom's review of The Mister. Don't misunderstand, "The Mister" is definitely a bad book, but I think I like Krimson's review better because Dom just went in for perfectly normal writing conventions and painted them as bad without really giving a reason why he thought it was bad or at least why it was bad for "The Mister" to do it. So thanks, Krimson. A refreshing way to get both righteously mad at bad writing while learning to improve my own without feeling self conscious that I'm "just as bad as this bad author" for doing similar things. As you said. Things like Love Triangles and long italicized passages can be done right and have a place. It's using them for the wrong reasons (i.e. just because Twilight did it/just because it differentiates the writing) that stuff like that becomes a problem.

@keyman1737

3 жыл бұрын

I agree, I like the Dom, but krimson give a good break down on why a trope is bad in a give book.

@keyman1737

3 жыл бұрын

@@blueberrymuffin_144 it depends on what you are try to write. Such as themes or elements, you are trying to get across to the reader.

@sixrabbits3972

3 жыл бұрын

@@blueberrymuffin_144 One important thing for writing is to remember that your first draft is going to be trash. That's okay, its job is to get everything out onto the page (or screen) and then you can go back in and tidy it up.

@keyman1737

3 жыл бұрын

@@blueberrymuffin_144 try working out the world lore and backstory. And how you characters fit into it.

@simj202

3 жыл бұрын

Cliches and tropes aren't inherently bad, remember this.

It's messed up that she wrote a self-insert character and literally made every man in love with her, and every woman hate her.

Wait, Scheherazade is from 1,001 Arabian Nights, she's the storyteller that recites the stories of Arabian Nights to the king so he won't execute her. What kind of connection could there possibly between that and Zade's character? Also, for future reference if the name ever comes up again it's pronounced Sche - hare - uh - zahde.

"Love triangles almost never work!" Me, thinking: Yeah, the only story I ever saw it really work in is Fruits Basket. "The only story I ever saw it really work in is Fruits Basket!" Okay I guess it's a universal truth now that Fruits Basket has the only non-awful love triangle. Fruits Basket Love Triangle Bonus: Two guys are in love with the lead, Tohru. It's not the two you think it is.

@mori6434

3 жыл бұрын

Wait, am I forgetting something about Fruit's Basket? Who are the two that aren't who I think they are?

@jessip8654

3 жыл бұрын

@@mori6434 maybe a bit of bad wording on my part haha. Guess without saying spoilers I just mean the love triangle doesn't go the way love triangles traditionally go. Someone you think is in love with Tohru isn't.

@mori6434

3 жыл бұрын

@@jessip8654 ah, I see what you mean now. Hey, who would've thought, the only love triangle people like is the one that turns out to not be a love triangle in the end. It's almost like they're terrible and no one should write them

@caoimhepower395

3 жыл бұрын

The Infernal Devices trilogy actually has a pretty decent love triangle too. But then, it's approached a bit differently than most love triangles.

@gwendolynstata3775

3 жыл бұрын

Also, Fruits Basket is a cute little slice of life drama story with a touch of supernatural elements, whereas HfM tries to bill itself as an urban fantasy action story written by a NLOG.

At least the cover is better than the one on empress Teresa, despite plagiarizing.

@NapaCat

3 жыл бұрын

Empress Theresa isn't hard to be better than.

@jamiedoesstuff5871

3 жыл бұрын

I get what you mean, but I'd personally consider this one worse. At least Teresa's wasn't stolen...

@eve6262_

3 жыл бұрын

I can respect a shit cover done yourself. At least you tried, and that's what matters. If the book didn't get so creepy I could almost respect Norman for trying, despite failing.

@zevaronxz7288

3 жыл бұрын

emperess teresa tells you what you're getting though

@wcapewell3089

3 жыл бұрын

@@zevaronxz7288 trash, thats what we got.

I wasn't aware that there *was* a gender-flipped Bechdel Test, let alone that one could *fail* it, and yet somehow this book managed to do it.

Better name for this book: "I'm Not Like Other Girls" Zade's Story

I have to say: this novel feels much like the first draft of the novel I'm writing. In the sense that I was worried about explaining too little, or giving so very few details that the reader might not understand what I was talking about. Only that in reading that draft, I realized I actually was explaining too much, and drowning everything in inconsequential details, and unnecesary character explanations. Doesn't seem like Lani Sarem went through that second draft.

@ayajade6683

3 жыл бұрын

This is why you edit and let other people with red pens make your draft bleed

@pikapower_kirby

3 жыл бұрын

As an aspiring author with a bad habit of over-explaining, I completely sympathize. Thankfully, my best friend is also a writer and he helps me out by critiquing things. I'm very sensitive to criticism but I know I need to hear it, because oftentimes it really helps ^^;

@isdrakon9802

3 жыл бұрын

When I write I have the opposite problem because I'm very short and to the point in writing so I'll give a good scene but it might not be an entirely clear picture

Fun fact: Scheherazade's name is from the famous story "One Thousand and One Nights", and is the magnificent storyteller in the story... something that Zade *_isn't_* and bonus fun fact, if Zade's name is pronounced like Scheherazade( pronounced as Sh-air-Ah-Zah-D) then Zade actually isn't pronounced as Z-ay-D but rather as Zah-D so, the reason she gets upset about her name being pronounced wrong is probably because of that but, I mean can you blame people for getting it wrong? The name's origin is Arabic, and I'm quite sure Zade *_isn't_* Arabic.

@aaljustaal1890

3 жыл бұрын

In defence of her nickname being pronounced Z-ay-d (and I hate defending this damn woman), it is fairly common for nicknames to have a different pronunciation than their counterparts. For example, Matt being a nickname for Matthew. However, she has no right to be so anal about the pronunciation of her name because she doesn't introduce herself Scheherazade; she introduces herself as Zade, so I really don't know how other characters are supposed to make the Zade-Scheherazade connection

@sirsoftspoken

3 жыл бұрын

Another fun fact: Scheherazade is the German-usage equivalent to the Middle Persian *Čehrāzād*, which basically means “noble blood.” It’s like the author thought, “Hmmm... what’s the queenliest name I could possibly use?”

@MechanizedAngelz

3 жыл бұрын

@@sirsoftspoken, ha! That's hilarious.

@MechanizedAngelz

3 жыл бұрын

@@aaljustaal1890, what do you mean she mentioned it halfway though?! How could you *_not_* know that _it came from a story that was made in _*_c. 1706-1721._* It was _so,_ obvious! (On a serious note, yeah... no clue why Zade gets mad that no one knows, and fair point that names can be pronounced differently than where they originate from.)

@RANima71498

3 жыл бұрын

Lol I’d just pronounce her name as “Zay-d” anyway cause I don’t care about “hurting her feelings”.

As an amateur writer, these videos give me hope. 1. It’s basically a lesson on what not to do, and 2. If this crap can be published than anything I write can be

So I'm at 47-ish minutes in, where you start talking about the magic system and what powers Zade has... And I'm so mad because "Zade does Tarot but the cards actually have guiding spirits that tell her what they mean/what advice to give" actually sounds so cool! Like, can you imagine a book where that's her only power and it's used well!? Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

@andrewollmann304

11 ай бұрын

Actually, there is one like that: the Twilight Hauntings duology by Angie Sage. The main character, Alex, has a set of hexagonal, magic cards which, while not summoning spirit guides, actually show a vision of the furure to her.

Always remember, Krimson, there's good books out there. Before you go insane entirely from reading these sucky pieces of crap.

@legofan6669

3 жыл бұрын

Some where over the rainbow there’ll be good books

@QJ89

3 жыл бұрын

But where's the fun in that?

@SergioLeonardoCornejo

3 жыл бұрын

Well. Good books are harder to find on the YA related sector.

@addicted2mako

3 жыл бұрын

A lot of those good books are right behind him, so he won’t have to go far

Useless 2 cents on the chunky hair: I think chunky is often referred to large chunks of coloring. She's basically saying large sections of the bottom of her hair have been dyed - because only interesting people dye their hair.

@asalways1504

3 жыл бұрын

I thought it was referring to parts of her hair that had snarls and or dried up dead split ends. Meaning that she doesn't take care of her hair at all or goes to get it trimmed.

@ayajade6683

3 жыл бұрын

@@asalways1504 why not both dyed crusty ends

@hernehaugen6878

3 жыл бұрын

@@ayajade6683 I hate this comment, so much. Have a like for my agony.

@TravisBroski

3 жыл бұрын

This could be terrifyingly true because Lani does in real life

@sadrabbit53

3 жыл бұрын

From her author photo, it looks like she dipped the ends of her hair in paint and let it dry. So I'm not sure which "chunky" she means...

Oh wow, the paragraph of Zade describing herself in the mirror is peak 14yo wattpad writing.

Tragic thing is "Handbook for Mortals" is a pretty dope title for a book its so wasted