We need more movies with Gramps. "Gramps Goes to San Francisco" "Gramps Goes to Starbucks" "Gramps Goes to Burning Man" "Gramps Goes to a Mexican Prison"

@losttribe3001

3 жыл бұрын

We’re more likely to get: Gramps Goes to the Fluoride Factory Gramps Goes to Wired Magazine Headquarters Gramps Goes to His Granddaughter’s Piano Recital and Gets Arrested

@AssassinoJake

Жыл бұрын

Gramps Goes to Eli's house

@Dr.JustIsWrong

4 ай бұрын

Gramps escapes from New York..

@UniquaDaBackyardigan

Ай бұрын

Gramps Does Dallas

@Tareltonlives

Ай бұрын

Gramps goes to a Hospital Gramps goes to Jerusalem Gramps goes to Harlem Gramps goes to Stonewall

Forrest Valkai also has a great take-down of this movie since it is largely in his "evolutionist" wheelhouse. He had as much fun and frustration as the boys did here.

I took your advice and actually watched this movie. I was raised in a Christian household and there are real people in this world like gramps that talk to kids all the time. Also thank you.

"Novelizations." "AAAAH!!" Think I know what Noah sounds like when he climaxes.

J key: back 10 seconds. K-key: pause. L-key: advance 10 seconds. Great video ^w^

@brucebaker810

3 жыл бұрын

I learned that recently. From some other helpful person's tip. So, while relistening to GAM's here, I heard Noah (at ~1:05) say "no back button". And I, too, posted that.

If the film makers did a Shutter Island twist at the end of this film it would have made hilarious sense... even to some Christians! "Of course this was all in his head, I don't know about the Biology teacher being played by his grand-daughter that he never met but bravo!!!"

'Gary Sue: The Movie'

@tubian323

Жыл бұрын

Or maybe a Gary Stu

When I was in college, I missed my first Mythology Class because I was sick. So, before the 2nd class started, I asked my teacher for a syllabus. I quickly read it and asked her when we were going to cover the Bible?!? She nearly choked, nervously laughed, paused to gather her thoughts, and cleverly got out of it by telling me that we only had time to cover the Greek and Roman gods. I wish I knew at that time that the New Testament was originally written in Greek, because I might have pressed the issue further! That was the only time in college that I ever heard religion talked about even though I got an AAS, BS, and a MS Ed degree.

Every time you guys said "Donald James..." I kept expecting Trump to follow.

@At0micPunk90

4 жыл бұрын

Same.

@UniquaDaBackyardigan

Ай бұрын

What do you wanna bet he practices signing his name like that? Like girls used to do in school with the last name of a guy we liked.

"That makes the scene so much sadder... but I will still laugh at it because fuck that guy." XD

"I've been called an animal before, just never a party animal" "You shot first at My Lai?! What does that mean! I have so many questions!" I lost it XD

@beccahawkins1905

4 жыл бұрын

I think (and this is just a theory) that this was an anti-evolution line. Conservative evangelicals like Donald James Parker don’t like to admit that human beings are animals too, as that would be admitting that evolution happened.

For those of you who don’t know this movie is on KZread currently.

I feel like DJP is subconsciously trying to process his miserable life through these films but refuses to admit that he’s the problem

@vaiyt

Жыл бұрын

"author trying to say something about the world but only exposing their own neuroses" is one of my favorite genres.

It would be more accurate to say that "This is the craziest thing we've watched *so far*".

@philiplynx6991

4 жыл бұрын

Absolutely, because if past movies are any indication there are a higher than zero number of filmmakers/directors who would see that and respond with 'Challenge accepted.'

@losttribe3001

3 жыл бұрын

I agree that this is bad. I actually have sat through the actual movie and it’s sooooooo bad! But I don’t know how you top Loving The Bad Man?

So let me get this straight: This is one of those crappy fanfics with a self insert Gary Stu... but of REALITY??? I didn't know somebody would actually be dumb enough to publish such a thing.

So...if I understand this movie correctly, a woman is brought back from the dead via prayer and somehow that's not the main theme but more of an aside?! That's so insane even by Christian movie standards.

@juliamason6867

2 жыл бұрын

RIGHT?!

@Nocturnalux

2 жыл бұрын

@@juliamason6867 Christian movies always manage to surprise one. Never pleasantly, though!

@Dr.JustIsWrong

4 ай бұрын

Did she resurrect drunk, or hung over?

This is the direction "Sonichu" would've taken if Chris didn't lose his god-damned mind after making Issue #10.

@RobotsEverywhereVideos

2 жыл бұрын

a google search later, I am scarred for life.

@vincemcmahonreadskoran3120

2 жыл бұрын

@@RobotsEverywhereVideos was it the blue spike making him shove his medallion in his ass or the series finale where he fuckedupnedness his mom?

I’ve now watched the movie and listen to the GAM cast...and...this...was...AWESOME! Holy fuck. Go watch the movie. Now!!!

The movies you guys review hit rock bottom, and then you start tunneling. Bravo!

I don’t know what I want to see more. This movie or heath at the gym on a treadmill. Lol

I admit it. I watched it at your request. I mean… just wow. That was true cinematic feces. You guys found a winner with this one.

I watched about 3 minutes of this movie and I can safely say the opening cut scene for the first Resident Evil on the PS1 had better acting.

I dont know about the rest of you but Noah as Donald james Parker is my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE impression on the show. hands down

Noah: "And keep in mind, KZread doesn't have a convenient 'go back ten seconds' button..." Maybe this wasn't the case at the time this was recorded, but J goes back 10 seconds, K pauses, L goes forwards 10 seconds, and the left/right arrow keys go 5 seconds backwards and forwards, respectively.

@brucebaker810

3 жыл бұрын

I too shared J and K above. Didn't know about arrow keys, but makes sense. Thanks.

I actually watched this movie as you suggested. I feel like I lost some brain cells just watching. It was so hard to watch.

This isn't far off from a Clint Eastwood film.

@Dir8ktor12

Жыл бұрын

Hey now, Clint Eastwood has a grasp on mise en scene and blocking and lighting, he can direct actors and get good performances out of them, and he’s proven that he can make a movie and make money off of it. You might not like him, but hot damn the guy can actually make a fucking movie. That’s a LOT more than Donald James Parker can do

This is a great analysis, but I was really hoping to find out precisely how much the movie weighs.

how could a movie this bad not manage to pick up a single golden raspberry, i wondered. so i found out the glorious "kirk cameron's saving christmas" happened the same year.

@TheLowBrassDude

Ай бұрын

This is also basically a home movie shot on a halfway decent camcorder

1:34:20 is serial killer crazy! I just caught my breath... 🤣

Are we sure Trump doesnt watch this movie every night as motivation porn?

"Tonight we're gonna have ourselves a drinking contest! Only twenty dollars to get in, winner walks away with the WHOLE pot!" The whole pot...which consists of two people, lol. And I love how the one black dude in the movie has thirty seconds of total screen time and is there to bring up killing grandpa or to find someone who can.

I was thinking about watching this one, but I really need to cut my toenails before Judge Judy comes on.

*Sharing Useful Knowledge* 1:05:00 Noah says he clicked back multiple times on the video progress bar "because KZread doesn't have a 'go back x seconds button'." *YES IT DOES!* J is 15s. I recently learned. I use it all the time now.

@pvthitch

3 жыл бұрын

Well, damn! You learn something new every day. Thanks!

@brucebaker810

3 жыл бұрын

@@pvthitch Yep. We could get more use from so much stuff we do. alas, for the lack of a hack! Space bar is play/pause, btw.

1:34:35 I always thought that being disowned Jewish style was the most brutal or the popular "she's dead to me!" about relatives who merely disagree with your dogmatic nonsense but nope... "whom I've never met" about a granddaughter that he has disowned takes the prize for darkest and most revealing inner shitstorm exposed ever! Indeed, the Coen brothers would have been impressed.

@Nocturnalux

4 жыл бұрын

And there's a sequel in which he gets to met these thus far unknown to him grandchildren so it gets even darker and sadder!

@nomobobby

4 жыл бұрын

We need that sequel on GAM. Somebody draft a patition, we need to shine a light on his brand of crazy christanity. This anti-intellectal, frick the liberals bs needs to be brought under the hottest spot light we can find. Seriously, this guy sounds like he literally crawled out of Holier Than Thou Christain church, Christ town, Jesus land.

Oh boy, Heath missed a good one this time around.

1:05:55 ... KZread does, though? It's the left arrow key. Just make sure you've got the video selected and not some other part of the browser.

Also fun work

DJ Parker is Tommy Wiseau but make it evangelical

I know I’m not patreon. But I think the movie domestics on Hulu was crazy I thought it was produced by the NRA with a concussion because of the amount of cinematic issues. I took a bunch of notes on it as well because the people around me couldn’t stand to listen to me decimated so I had to type it into my notes I don’t know it be really cool to see a difference on the Internet from a suggestion I made ha ha keep up the good work

@sonofseptember

2 жыл бұрын

I can’t even begin to decipher this comment.

I always thought that Americans were exaggerating 'the covered shoulders school rule', coz it was always about sun protection...

when do we start the movie for sync?

Wait. Why would a pink Cadillac be at a maffia funeral

It should've been David Banner, because he's the one that has to move on at the end of the episodes!

Holy “bloody stool” Batman! This movie was more painful than a cheese grater scraping the nads. Over and over...

OMG.... Totally forgot the DrBonner Soap joke..... Gotta say I LOVE that stuff..... But the packaging is SOOOOOO crayCray

Noah is a height supremacist?? O.o

I love how so many of these are just masturbation fantasies. Like the last one was "Oh yeah, bet when there's a social breakdown and there's mobs they'll love my guns and preaching!" and this one is ""I actually won that argument and have totally been unappreciated and I'm smarter than anyone else because I have no knowledge whatsoever!" The negaverse Scorcese, fundamentalist Neil Breen The irony of the creator of this movie not being familiar with organisms without brains. All he needed to do is look in the mirror. I love how these movies have an even worse grasp on sports than they do science, ethics or theology "Come on, you're drunk" I feel like that should be said after every single line of dialogue in this movie. Well, this movie is like the part of Lord of the Rings where the Hobbits are just trudging through a dreary bog full of corpses then go up endless stairs all to get to an arid wasteland ruled by a psychopathic deity that wants to conquer the world and conform to his slavery

You know... sometimes you guys mention that you exaggerate a little because the movies are so boring.. I actually scanned through this movie along with you. It's crazier than you let on. Somehow. It's bad. REALLY bad. Also, the singular form of species IS NOT SPECIE. Why does Gramps say this?! Did they not spell-check their script? Who am I kidding.

Nah the professor was a hungry cougar, and wanted him. Dont know why?

@jeanhind8198

Жыл бұрын

I know, right?! Was it the white thinning hair, the complete lack of shoulders (!😊) OR his completely boorish, self-righteous attitude about absolutely everything! Any woman's dream, clearly..! The best part for me was him worried about being overcome by lust simply by her not wearing a jacket in her own home!! Unbelievable, but even more was that she didn't ask him to leave!