It's amazing how quickly you can go from Golden Child to Black Sheep when you no longer model yourself after your mother's image.

@RICHARDGRANNON

10 жыл бұрын

Absolutely.

@confusedwolfy3474

5 жыл бұрын

Agreed

@bubblywaters3116

5 жыл бұрын

So true! After 54 years a light came on and now I won't give her supply and wow it's like I'm the worst person on the planet when I used to be her best friend. I call her Momster now. I see it all so clearly now. Even my childhood that I thought was pretty much okay is now giving me flashbacks of untruths and it's dawned on me that nothing I know to be true was true and/or real. It's such an odd feeling.

@brandybroadus4421

4 жыл бұрын

ACEnBEAKY exactly

@dianahferreira5779

4 жыл бұрын

True. When I was young cause I was the baby my mother spoiled me and caused jealousy with my older siblings. I realized she was doing it to control me and did not let me think for myself and when I turned 38 I broke free and now I am the outsider and they the faves now. Most peace I ever had!!

The narcissist wants to own your perception. That's spot on.

@Justanameandnumber

4 жыл бұрын

Spot on! Lmfao

The problem with a narc parent is that you find another one to marry if you don't get healing first.

@PS-dg4mu

4 жыл бұрын

Soo true, I had figure out marrying one divorcing healing and then couple of years later uncovering my Mother was Narcissist and I put all the pieces together.

@baron_iar2694

3 жыл бұрын

The trap is trying to fix ur broken relationship w/ the narc parent through the narc partner

"Never expect compassion" -- great advice.

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

If i try to tell my mother about any of my problems, I always get a speech about how horrible *her* life is. I never get an ounce of compassion from her.

@Acetyl53

4 жыл бұрын

@@Stigmatix666 I'm beginning to (again) become aware this is the case. Anything I say she'll eventually weaponize, generally by pitting me against other people. "Oh [Acetyl] said it's XYZ", yes, in passing, and generally misquoted.

@maureenbrown6697

4 жыл бұрын

@@Acetyl53 Weaponized. That is the sick truth. I tell anyone who will listen never tell my so called mother anything. She collects information from conversations to use against me later. I'm often misquoted, lied about or sabotaged. Even a good deed will be twisted into something bad. Anything she can do to create disharmony among her kids.

@nastjavo

4 жыл бұрын

Yea.. Trhe. Then one day they are compassionate, and 364 days are not.. And then you hope for that one day to come :D.. Well.. Not anymore..

@psychictruth5037

3 жыл бұрын

@@maureenbrown6697 💯👏

I grew up in a home with 2 narcs and I was the black sheep,, that's why I moved away 3,000 miles away. Our home was a hell hole. I never want to see them again for my own mental health. "Been there done that have the tee shirt". The constant feeling of going insane for me was enough. They destroy everything. (especially if its yours).

@TaylorZBruner

7 жыл бұрын

Lorraine my dad and step mom sound like your parents.. I'm 15 and I have 3 years till I get the hell out of there.. they gave my brother a car and he's 15... ug

@danieltheteacher

7 жыл бұрын

Taylor Bruner You can move out at 16 if you become emancipated and get a job. Somebody will help you. You're allowed to quit school, too. Of course do get a trade like carpentry and mechanics, or plumbers. You must earn money. You can fix air conditioners etc. Later you can go to school for so ething else, but if you fix air conditioners then you will earn enough money for a room, food, and a car.

@helengaughan8930

7 жыл бұрын

Lorraine your the same as me

@lorrainelaskosky7785

7 жыл бұрын

hi i am stuck with her

@wizardkitty92

6 жыл бұрын

same here, I'm stuck with my mum (narcissist) and my stephfather (also narcissist).

I have had my heart broken too many times by my mum. Destroyed my self confidence.

@helenharrell9821

4 жыл бұрын

I truly understand where you are coming from. I have been the black sheep in my family for decades & I've had my feelings hurt many times because of this. I've come to realize that I need to live my life for myself!!! Dont give in to them & put yourself first.

@CS-mn2yd

4 жыл бұрын

I’ve also had my heart broken by my mother many times but she wasn’t the narcissistic, it was her friend whom was our neighbor. Sabotaging me and my family unit for her own pathetic narcissistic delicate ego our family which was already broken in her palm crushing our family even more fed her pathetic ego. The only way my mum got away from her was after I took a large overdose at age 14, and she’d already had found a new supply and ruined our family completely. I’m glad she is no longer our problem.

@myyahmeek38

4 жыл бұрын

😢😢😢😢

@drjcobra2187

4 жыл бұрын

She didnt distory your self confidence, you let her win & played the victim. Stop letting her win. Mentally tell her "You emotionally hurt me mom, I can forgive, but I Will not forget. You are dead to me." And then heal & love yourself & get back your self confidence that your mother never took bc it was never hers to begin with. I know you can do it. If you got this far to understand what NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) then you have what it takes to heal.

@redsparkle4884

3 жыл бұрын

@@drjcobra2187 I said these exact words to my younger sister this week. I let her walk all over me believing she understood me after everything I have been through in my life. In the past 2yrs, I started getting my life back together after being diagnosed with PTSD and working on myself and healing. The last 12mths I always knew my sister was screwing me over but I did not want to believe it. This week I finally took the plunge as I could no longer take it anymore with the way she'd been treating me so I let all that anger out and told her how I felt. I could have handled it better but every time I think of her she makes me sick, so now she's dead to me.

I don't believe that people raised by narcs have narc tendencies necessarily - most are empaths and chronic forgivers - I do see that most people raised by narcs attract narcs as mates later on.

@MyBDUP

6 жыл бұрын

rosiethebear300 yes!

@melissapriddy9778

6 жыл бұрын

rosiethebear300 I have had to go to therapy to learn how to stand up & not bow down to the craziness... both family members & my husband. I am the black sheep of my family.

@BunnyBella821

6 жыл бұрын

Absolutely

@IAKM2023

5 жыл бұрын

Very true!

@Natalie-gb8tt

5 жыл бұрын

rosiethebear300 yes and we usually become co-dependant, I know I did that’s why I’ve been single for 5 years as I don’t trust my judgement anymore.

While attending a college graduation I witnessed a narcissistic mother meeting someone new. She introduced this person to her daughter, her "dear, dear friends" (Narcissists are good at politicking b.s.), and apparently introductions were over at that point. I noticed a young teenage boy who was apparently her son, with a video camera. Clearly this kid was the black sheep and isn't important enough for an introduction. I think narcissists should be charged with child abuse.

@narcbegone1507

5 жыл бұрын

They do, when and if they get caught. The problem is that they are so good at not getting caught.

@eileenhoulihan4294

4 жыл бұрын

R Feyman interesting observation. I am the the only daughter with five brothers. Whenever we were out as a family, my parents introduced their four sons and I wasn’t introduced or I was introduced as an after thought. “And this is our daughter.” Sometimes they used my name, sometimes not even. I was also told by my mother when I asked her how many children she wanted, “I wanted four boys.” And par for the course, scapegoated and black sheeped. I’ve been managing the emotional pain and feelings of not being good enough my entire life and I’m in my mid 50s. The work we have to do seems as if it never ends and there’s always another layer of the onion to peel back to get to a greater understanding of ourselves.

@dakotaadams3418

4 жыл бұрын

No way to prove it. In other people's mind my mother was a loving, caring, person she just twisted it saying i was a disrespectful child.

@rockstarofredondo

4 жыл бұрын

Wow totally sounds like my narc MIL.

@karimayall6415

4 жыл бұрын

@@dakotaadams3418 same

My mother is always jealous of how strong I am.. she tells me that. She is an idiot, she made me strong by making me the black sheep. baa aa aa

@gigimcfli2150

9 жыл бұрын

Im so happy I realized that people used me as a source.

@charliechase7390

6 жыл бұрын

I can strongly relate to that. My mother moved me to another country away from my entire family when i was a child. Forced me to learn english from scratch aged 7. And now she tells me it was all for my own good. She can never admit to ruining my childhood. She still believes I'm not good enough for her to respect me. From today, i will never let her into my heart ever again. I wish you strength and happiness Gigi

@DazedDebbieShow

6 жыл бұрын

My mom said to me snidely, "I'm glad you're so independent." Like I had any other option.

@narcbegone1507

5 жыл бұрын

Don X Useless waste of words to respond to a narc with anything, at any time, in any way. Ignore, block, pretend they are dead. Only way to move on. No matter what you say to them, it won't register. They will just use the opportunity to twist your words and hurt you more. Just abandon them. They deserve nothing less!

@ingriddenzin

5 жыл бұрын

I remember when I got divorced after a five year failed marriage, no children, I got a managerial job in another city. My mother told me that job was not for a woman and I was taking the bread out of a married man's mouth, and his wife and children.

I had a teacher once that called me "Cinderella" after meeting my family.

@SunShine-xu5jb

3 жыл бұрын

Recently my therapists called me that too!

@LoopyLaRue1

3 жыл бұрын

I had a police officer tell me "stay away from those people, they have it in for you", I should have listened then, BUT... better late than never.

@truthtarot7074

3 жыл бұрын

@@LoopyLaRue1 💯💯💯

@nomstar1956

2 жыл бұрын

My family used to call me that. To my face 🙄

@jeanlanie1

2 жыл бұрын

My BFF calls me "Cinderella" for she knows my life situation.

My mother very much tries to control what anyone else knows or perceives about her or our “family.” The need to control EVERYTHING. I’m 33 and still to this day she tells me don’t say this or don’t say that. I never do or have because it was just ingrained in me to portray perfection but she still just HAS to say it. She somehow makes me feel like I’m standoffish, rude, or ungrateful when I’m actually very very sensitive and giving. Crazy stuff. The rage is laughable to me now. I stay away. So much rage. She’d kill me for writing this if she saw it. HA!!!

So hard when you withdraw and you start to get perspective but don't know who to trust

@michaelalderson5098

7 жыл бұрын

don't hold back man that's the good stuff, people need to hear it especially at 🌃

@Juliette20382038

7 жыл бұрын

i feel you

@waynewatanabe2207

7 жыл бұрын

"WHO DO I TRUST? ME, THAT'S WHO! " Tony Montana (who also had a narcissistic mom if you think about it.. #genius!)

@OldLadyFarmer58

7 жыл бұрын

I Understand completely, I am trying to get up the courage to try again. How do you find positive experiences to replace the bad ones, when every time you try someone tries to knock you down?

@bigpopslaflare

7 жыл бұрын

Lorena Ann Rice it's crazy I wrote that 9 mos ago. Bring me back to that time. Still recovering, taking baby steps. Main thing I've learned in 9 mos is you GOTTA trust yourself. Understanding the self will help you.

Because you can lose the ability to make friends, because you have no confidence, because you feel guilty, (Mom thinks you don't love her if you assert yourself) because your mother has everyone who knows you believing you are bad and ungrateful!

@lilblondiebear

4 жыл бұрын

Dang, do we share the same mom or what?

@ReInCarbonatedCrow

3 жыл бұрын

Or she at least has you thinking that's what everyone thinks of you. Chances are at least SOME of those people can see she's a crazy bitch and just feel bad for her kids.

I've had a Narcassistic dad"who passed and a narcassistic Mom who still is alive and it still is hard for me to comprehend how they really never cared about my emotional well being. Never. They always put there needs above all else. Never a sorry for anything but lots of guilt if you stand up to them.. It's been a difficult learning curve when you start reading more about narcassism. There's no cure so dont even try to point out the stuff they do! It's like beating your head against a wall trying to have a discussion with a narcassist. I have to say very difficult life growing up in a house like that...

@nunyabizzz1135

6 жыл бұрын

bryankh83 I had the same shitty experience

@XFonti-ik3ql

4 жыл бұрын

I totally understand, same here, my covert Narcissist dad still alive, 92 years old! my extroverted Narcissist mother passed away 2 years ago ! if my dad would had died before mom, we would have never known that was a Narcissist 🤔 , the covert Narcissist are extremely difficult sometimes to detect, I been learning about Narcissism for the last 2 years, and I am in shock the monsters they are, especially the covers ones !!! 🙄🤔😕🙃

@mm7411

Жыл бұрын

I was and am still completely invisible, as if I never existed and never wanted. I was told this from my mother repeatedly at a young age. Horrible existence. Deliberate division from my 2 brothers, aunts, uncles. My mother told horrible stories about me to anyone who showed empathy to me. My father died years ago and I felt nothing. At that point I realized he was the covert and she the overt. God helped me through what was to come after dad passed. The same but now it was all about my mother, she was elated! It is all about her now. There is slight contact at this point, as I really don't care. I don't hate, I am not numb, I can honestly say Today, I am ok. I studied up and see the truth, I was never accepted for the fact that I would never comply in playing the game of evil. By no means am I perfect or sinless, but I am confident that I will never be fooled again. I am single and loving it, honestly. I find peace in my solitude of prayer, friends, family and work. I have hope.

@jellybellyfun3288

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for your post. Were there other children in the household? Were the other children emotionally neglected, too?

I’m actually a psychologist and I am the ‘black sheep’ and my brother is the ‘golden child’ (The entire family has called him that our entire lives) and I suffered from the abuse of a narcissistic mother my entire life. There is no changing her, she literally refuses to see that anything is EVER wrong with her behavior. The only thing you can do is remove them from your life. She’s unable to get to me, but she still affects us all negatively by making the family unable to interact with one another. I’m just waiting for her to die so we can all relax and enjoy one another again.

@jamessmith-hi1rr

6 жыл бұрын

I was the black sheep but the Golden Child my brother suffered too.

@nokomismn9685

6 жыл бұрын

No need to wait for your mother to die. You can get all the support you wish from your father and siblings without delay.. It isn't your mother's fault that you don't interact properly with one another. It sounds like you're all adults, so act like it!

@juliawebster3405

6 жыл бұрын

I agree with MamaBethsWorld, my brother refuses to speak to me as he sees me as the golden child who never stood up for him as the scapegoat. What he doesn't see is that I was completely moulded by my mother as a child and teenager. I literally have no sense of my own identity. When I talk to people I have no idea if it's the real me talking or a moulded version!

@smc1942

6 жыл бұрын

MamaBethsWorld ; I'm 2 year's free from the same. I liken it to cutting a cancerous tumor from my chest. The Pain, the scar's, but the surgery has saved my life. I maintain the NO CONTACT RULE. And have no regret's about it. To let them back in my life would be to let their abuse in too. They will never change. I see that now. So today, I have my family of me. It's still hard, but there is improvement. I take life one step at a time. I thought I was the only one, until I stumbled on to these video's. Now I know it's not me. That encourages me to talk about it.

@trebortrahrebe2575

6 жыл бұрын

I'm the golden child. But thing about it is the golden child gets picked on from the black sheep.

Narcs don't always open with an insult. Sometimes it starts with "Hello Dear, how have you been?" and ends with, "Don't be so dramatic, I don't criticize you. Criticism is only to make you feel bad. I tell you everything that's wrong with you because I love you. I'm doing you a favor, I'm trying to make your life better!" Very insidious shit.

@latoyag9328

6 жыл бұрын

Abby Cross oh yeah

@dean8705

5 жыл бұрын

That's covert narcissism. Overt narcissism is way less subtle and obvious.

@staciwhite4276

5 жыл бұрын

Oh yes!!! You described my mother’s manipulation of my life from birth!

@starlight_synthesis

4 жыл бұрын

I'm doing this because I love you - is something predators say.

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

Narcs, both overt AND covert, never start a dialogue with an insult. It just comes creeping slowly into the conversation.

I was the black sheep and my little sister was the golden child she got everything she ever wanted where as I got nothing, I couldn't do anything. My mother always tried to control me, She let men do whatever they wanted to me and she just stood there and watched, she also tried to break my relationship up when it was starting out and its only the past two years I have come to realise that this was the case I am now suffering with PTSD and anxiety and depression im on the road to getting my life back on track and I no longer speak to my mother. She didn't succeed with breaking my relationship though because I have now been marred for five years to the man she tried to destroy my relationship with.

@crystalush

8 жыл бұрын

do you think she is envious of you?

@krimsonsuccubz

8 жыл бұрын

Crystal Hammond yes probably thinking about it now shes always tried to destroy anything i have ever done

@tiffanipuccio9713

8 жыл бұрын

whoo. this speaks to me. my mother was INSANELY jealous of me...which was confirmed by an older friend of another family that was around when i was growing up. its horrid. when i was trying to confront her about this years ago, she ended up getting angry and yelling sorry i ruined your life *click*. im becoming more ok with this, as my sister is her exact clone. i worry about my nephew, because he excells at things just like i did when i was younger. he even expressed to me that he doesnt understand why kids get mad because hes naturally good at something...i fear for him so much growing up like that, with those narcisists

@sanjaypatel6906

7 жыл бұрын

Good for you, I hope you get the life that your deserve or alt least a better life 👍👍👍👍

@cymar1000

7 жыл бұрын

My mum tried to do the same with all my relationships she knew about. I rarely told her about any relationships I had as I figured that she was jealous and wanted me to be permanently miserable in order to make her feel good. My mum has a habit of rewriting history and denying what she said or did. She used to hit me for defending myself even though my GC brother started hitting and kicking me in the first place, and she never got my side of the story. She vehemently denied that any of this happened, yet I have very clear memories of it. I left home at 19yo as I felt it was time to fly the nest and stand on my own 2 feet, yet she and my GC brother said that I pissed off to live with my BF and left my ill father. My dad's cancer was used as a tool to try and make me feel guilty for moving out of the house, but my dad was on to the type of people my brother and mum were and told me to walk away from them. My dad's last words to me were "Mama, it's not something I'd do as a family man, but if you want to go No Contact with them, I'll totally understand". Best words I ever heard.

Oh my God, this is my life, I'm the black sheep and its so hard. Thank you so much for this, i have been searching for answers for 45 years. Thank you.

@jennymaihall

9 жыл бұрын

dionne lane DITTO dionne. I'm 55 and grieving for the life (up until now) I SHOULD OF HAD!

@CosmicCat23

8 жыл бұрын

dionne lane I remember a female friend I had who would constantly put me and others down. If confronted, she would say "I am only telling the truth, if you (or they) can't take it then you have an even bigger problem." Back then, I had no idea the mind screw this was and would walk away feeling like crap. Of course, if you applied this to her, she would fly into a rage. Important to learn the rules of these psycho games so you can protect yourself.

@mgmail7279

8 жыл бұрын

+Jenny Hall I'm so sorry for your losses. I know it's not any consolation, but you're not alone. How are you coping? (Thanks for any tips from someone in the same boat.)

@dionnelane6445

8 жыл бұрын

Well time seems to help a lot. What a journey it was though, i still have nightmares about her every night.

@mgmail7279

8 жыл бұрын

+dionne lane Yes, the nightly nightmares are ridiculous and horrible. I'm not sure time's helping me. I think it's too late and I'm too tired to try anymore - there's nothing left to try for.... You hang in there though as you sound hopeful! Wishing you the best.

I am now essentially isolated from my entire family. A year ago I figured out that my mother was a malignant narc after a second Narc girlfriend. My pathway was going to a psychologist after the break up to find out why I felt so broken and kept going for girls who seemed abusive, realising my ex girlfriend was a narc, researching narcs, and then the penny dropping when reading my mothers text messages, full of blatent gas lighting and the usual "you dont care about your mother" nonsense. None of my family understands, my mother is essentially the matriarch. They believe me to be crazy. I still have my dads side. He is not related to me by blood but is still there for me. I guess I should have seen the warning signs. When I was 18 and went for a passport the passport office told me I had taken my adoption certificate and not my birth certificate. I went home confused and told my mum and all she said was, "Yeah your dad isnt your dad, didnt you know?". And that was it. My life imploded. She did nothing. It wasnt even mentioned again. Even when I explain the lack of empathy in that reaction, how cruel and brutal, my family excuses it as her in a touch situation by surprise. That was 19 years ago and im still struggling somewhere inside with it. She has also since I stopped all contact a year ago, sent me a text calling me a shit and telling me she will expose me to the entire family, I dont even know what that means. She also told some members she will never talk to them again if they discuss this "Issue" between me and her. That should be proof in itself. When I think back to the emotional abuse as a child the hair on the back of my neck still prickles. Here I am now in a semi self imposed isolation, considered to be the problem....

@lillyputin4147

7 жыл бұрын

You should expose her to the entire family by telling them all what you just said here. You are better off without her. Don't ever speak to her again.

@renegaderoadhouse4128

6 жыл бұрын

Spencer23$ - Clash Royale and Clash of Clans they don't change. They are mentally disordered. Very sick. Go no contact is only way.

@JustMe-sm9bu

6 жыл бұрын

I can empathize with your feelings. Stay strong my friend

@rachaelfurnette1827

6 жыл бұрын

when your mm gets "Older"dont end up like me,Im the oldest my sister is the golden child and im the black sheep been out of family for 40 years...im planning my escape...sister is younger and toxic mean and nasty...I dont have to say anything for her to act like my mother or my boss...

@internationalpug1318

6 жыл бұрын

Spencer23$ - Clash Royale and Clash of Clans I have not had contact with my parents or sisters for 16 months. I was the black sheep, I was the middle child, and took severe beatings from a very young age from my Father, my mother stood by, never stopped him...my sister's did not receive the isolation or abuse I did. I never understood why my mother desired affection from me, but withheld love. I remember being woken up during summer break at 6am an forced to pack my father's lunch for work, I could never make my father proud no matter what I accomplished. I left home at 16, married a 23yr old chronic alcoholic who was as brutal as my father. I never told my parents how I lived, or survived. The point of doing so would of been my fault. I tried for years to show my parents how good I could be, I was the only child to graduate college, doing so when my own children were in highschool. I remained married for 32 years, only recently divorced two years ago. I advanced in my career, to amazing heights. My children went to college, my sister's children have criminal records, as does my father's favorite baby daughter; my drug (meth) addicted sister... I was not invited to my father's 78th birthday party, my family from other states came. I was stunned by the cold shoulder i received as I went to the party at my aunt's behest who I hadn't seen for years. Afterwards I found a text message from my oldest sister to a cousin I was close with my entire life, I read the text as if it was about a stranger, I was wondering why my out of state family was distant to me during the party an had just found my answer. Lies were being passed around about how I tried to drug my parents, but my little sister (age 42) had ate the "tainted" cupcake with valium I supposedly placed an alarming amount of valium in. I assure anyone reading this I did no such thing. I confronted my family about the text messages, there were plenty more! To my surprise my father shrugged his shoulders and didn't seem to care about the terrible lies that distant me from extended family. I found this odd my extended family would be involved or even believe such a thing...I was no college educated financial manager of nine banks, mother of two sons who are gainfully employed, wonderful careers, owner of my own home, and fought for my father when diagnosed with asbestos from his years in the Navy, resulting in a nearly 300,000 settlement. My sister's, their children, grandchildren have all but drained my parents now, I never once received a thank you. I have been struggling with a chronic illness for the past 12 years, unable to further my career. It actually ended. No support or compassion from my parents, siblings, niece or nephew, a nephew I raised for two years while his mother was more interested in dope. I feel free I let them go, I had to. Now faced with a disease i can't control I feel alone, lost, empty. I raised my son's, their family men now, ive lost everything i worked since 16 to achieve. I won't let my guard down, or look for any comfort during this time I need them the most. I'm so worried I am now turning into one of them. Did you feel loss after the first year of no contact? I am struggling with heavy emotional baggage. I don't know how to make it better.

yup. I am the scapegoat, my brother is the GC. whenever something happens my mom immediate response is "oh, you are jealous of your brother " but the thing is, I never am. frustrating.

@evainbklyn

7 жыл бұрын

gemmys adventures She's projecting and triangulating. My mom does it all the time. She defends her secrets and lies by saying we're all jealous of each other.

@Isochest

7 жыл бұрын

A GC is actually incapacitated so take heart.

@kenedii_favored_blessed

7 жыл бұрын

+Isochest I told my GC sister that she was trapped for life. She didn't know what to say.

@naturalallnaturalwhitepist1789

6 жыл бұрын

gemmys adventures ahhh me to its fucked up, thing is the gc was a looser overweight and unattractive, not to be mean but there was 0 to be jealous of. I think that there jealous of you the sg that's why they project.

@emilbrogan3089

4 жыл бұрын

This is literally my mom when I express my displeasure with my brother. He's the GC, even though he's a 55 year old man-child that's just as selfish as she is. Not one of his siblings like him at all, not even enough to visit him in the hospital. But of course, the reason is that "we're just jealous."

My brother is 5 yrs older than me and he was the black sheep. When he was small, my mother would hit him on the head and say,"All boys are bad, they can't do anything good." When he was 14 he started to smoke pot and hang out with friends, maybe not coming home at night. He struggled at school. Instead of getting him help with the school counselor , my parents KICKED HIM OUT!!!! My mother loved him but couldn't deal with him, she was drinking heavily at the time and was too involved in herself, as she was going thru menopause. He had to live with his friends. I watched all of this and learned never to abandon a child. He cried when she died, at my urging he went to see her at the funeral home. He broke down saying, "Momma , Momma, why didn't you love me?" He was a 55 yr old man, not a child.

@reesedaniel5835

6 жыл бұрын

Your mother did NOT love him. That's not love. That's the opposite of love.

@narcbegone1507

5 жыл бұрын

2degucitas, Why did you urge him to go? That's none of your business. He was getting retraumatized all over again looking at that vicious psycho, even if dead. You owe your brother an apology, and tons of emotional support, after giving him stupid advice that will bring back lots of pain and flashbacks. Now go to your brother, and offer a listening ear, and a shoulder to cry on, anytime he needs. AND WITHOUT URGING. Learn how trauma works, and read about c-ptsd, before giving stupid advice. It's not your decision to make, who goes to which funeral. How about you support him in whatever decision HE makes? Then maybe I'll buy your fake compassion story. Coming here writing comments pretending to be holier than thou, when all you do is act selfishly, and do things that make YOU feel good. Also, your statement that "mom" loved your brother is utter and ugly gaslighting! Haven't you heard your brother? Do you listen? He questioned WHY she didn't love him. Which means he did not feel loved. Quit invalidating your brother's experience. If I knew your brother, I'd advise him to drop you, unless and until you learn to act like an empathetic human being. Because so far, all you've shown is, you have lots of narcissistic traits, and your brother should stay the hell away from you.

@xrc7445

5 жыл бұрын

@@narcbegone1507 Amen!

@privatelifejust_4me

4 жыл бұрын

saintquinn007 I have decided to not go to her funeral as well. I’m the oldest and I’ve been the black sheep my entire life, I’m just now understanding what I couldn’t put my finger on... my mother is a narc 😔 You are not wrong for feeling the way you do.

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

@@narcbegone1507 I agree. Urging him to go was a shitty thing to do. Absolutely unacceptable. Personally, I'll gladly urinate on my mother's tombstone when that time comes!

I disagree. The Golden Child doesnt have to be given more things, supported more, looked upon as greater than. The Golden Child is simply the child that the Narcissistic parent gets their supply out of. The Golden Child may not have any talents to speak of, may get bad grades, etc; there need not be anything 'special' about him except that he allows the parent to take something of his away from him: be that his servitude, his attention, his listening, or any other form of narcissistic supply. The Black Sheep is not worse than the Golden Child in any way; but because he doesnt give narcissistic supply to his parent, he is experienced as being a problem. IMO, I would think the Black Sheep were the healthiest of the 2, because he has broken away from the need to please, and therefore is more likely to be able to make his way in the world.

@gzig7844

7 жыл бұрын

Julie Meibaum my experience is that the golden child finds it easier to function on the cold, superficial level. Whereas the black sheep will have more inner strength but stripped of 'outer' level skills due to their torture. I was secondary golden child (I think) until the black sheep left - I still feel good about having helped her run away as a child :)

@armcandee3781

6 жыл бұрын

Julie Meibaum You are exactly rite!

@naturalallnaturalwhitepist1789

6 жыл бұрын

Julie Meibaum I'm not sure your understanding it exactly but it's a good thought

@rapunzelmane9592

5 жыл бұрын

Julie Meibaum + The Black Sheep/Scapegoat does give Narcissistic Supply to the Narcissist. The Narcissist gets most NS from abusing the Black Sheep. I've noticed that The Golden Child often does not stick around to serve the Narcissist, they often escape as they are often Narcissistic themselves, which is why the Narcissist (apparently) likes them so much as the GC is a mirror image of the Narcissist. It is often the Scapegoat who stays and looks after the elderly Narcissist whilst being abused by the narcissist all the while. Scapegoats often end up being People Pleasers because they have never pleased the Narcissist. Golden Children are not People Pleasers, they are too arrogant. The Golden Child is usually a brat, but their bad behaviour is usually forever overlooked, until they are replaced by a new, more useful, Golden Child.

@mcjordaniesaintelus9726

5 жыл бұрын

True

Has anyone dealt with a narcissist who plays the victim of a narcissist? All of my good intentions are turned against me, and framed differently, and they pretend they want to communicate with me, and then they give me the cold shoulder and when I confront them they have good excuses… So when I tell them that it is BS I look like the bad guy or the narc, I now look like the person who is wanting something and I am kept on the string this way... me being on the string is like a narcissistic supply… A narcissist pretending to be a victim of a narcissist to get the supply.. I believe when I confront the narcissist and reveal that it's BS… They get some kind of pleasure or enjoyment out of having control or hurting me in someway emotionally ..out of some sort of revenge… no contact is the only way, a narc setting me up to be the narc so they can be a victim and get sick pleasure from me trying to fix the problem, that was created by them in the first place! a real head bender!

@bubblywaters3116

5 жыл бұрын

I have and it's messed up. I know and feel your pain. You just explained my situation perfectly.

@jonog5632

4 жыл бұрын

Hit the nail on the coffin

@kayg2345

4 жыл бұрын

Yep that’s what they do lol quite sad! How desperate they are for you to communicate with them. Keep doing what you’re doing even if the idiot keeps begging for it.. it’s their drug absolute nutters lol look insane the irony of it they manifest what they say you are now that’s just dumb! haha 😂

@macdhomhnaill7721

4 жыл бұрын

Corey Flora I believe the term for that is “Covert Narcissist” and that is my mother to a T.

@thirstonhowellthebirdandfriend

4 жыл бұрын

Corey Flora Corey it was the exact same way in my family! I know exactly how you feel! I am so sorry for what I know you went through! I hope you are healing and doing better from when you made this post. My nf’s 4th wife and my ns did this constantly and I never knew whth was happening smh! Sometimes I can’t decide which is worse the actual horrific experience itself or the aftermath when you find out that you were dealing with someone who hates you, someone who was supposed to love you, someone that you trusted, did all of this in order to try and destroy you on purpose right in front of everyone else without anybody knowing what was happening right in front of their eyes! It’s evil just plain evil.

Thanks you just described my child hood. My mom is a narcissist and she tries to contact me but I hate her. I know that a no contact is the best way for me. She demands to see my son but I refuse to let her near him. I am allowed to say no to her now that I am an adult and those people who stand by her and say that I am a devils child. I am fine with that, because all I want is to live my life without her, because I feel better living without her influence and thank you for showing me that I am not alone in this. I have always been the black sheep and I refuse to go back in her claws, I hope she dies alone and miserably!

@alianajacobs5703

6 жыл бұрын

I am glad that everything turned out alright for you and that you're helping others on you tube to show them that they are not crazy! You are amazing!

@tonymbaabu5887

4 жыл бұрын

. Been trying to help my sister with leaving the claws of mum with no success... Love you for your courage!

My mother was a narcissistic and she had twins and so the splitting of one child to the other was a game to her. She loved to play one of us against the other. She was really happy to buy a treat and give it to one of us and say "you are my favorite" and then when the other one was sad that they did not get a treat she would say "life is not fair, so get over it". I was the "black sheep" and she took great pleasure in having me beg for her attention, approval, and love. She never gave any of it even to the day she died and I was the only one there because everyone else refused to take care of her.

This is exactly like my life. I wondered why I was so bad and nothing but trouble for years, although I never actually got into any bad trouble. It became a weight around my neck that I carried for years, being disassembled piece by piece, bullied physically, mentally and emotionally. Even when I moved out aged 17 she refused to cut ties and used emotional blackmail to insure I didn't cut her off, pretending to be concerned with what I was doing and saying she was worried about me. The way you described the narcissistic was almost like you were describing my mother. It's really hard to grow up like this without feeling exhausted. It's draining!

@BunnyBella821

6 жыл бұрын

Destructive Bliss yes! Same! Even with the email!!!

The Devil truly does have children of his own...

they tell me im dumb .... i have a masters degree... ur spot on

@moedoesvlogs8723

5 жыл бұрын

A Green Amazing!!! What an accomplishment! You should be extremely proud! F the family that can’t see it cause of their own jealously. Also I see this in my husbands family. My husband did not graduate college but he is extremely smart. He is also making over 100,000$ a year and yet he’s still not good enough for his narc mother. It’s sad. And sick!

@Thebestisyettocome1234

4 жыл бұрын

You have to be proud of yourself💗

@Stevie-steel

4 жыл бұрын

yup a common one i get.. "for a smart girl you sure are a dumbass"

@emanayad9040

4 жыл бұрын

be proud of yourself that's amazing, I have a Ph.D. and teaching position and treated like a door mat. thankfully I realized that it is not my fault at all.moving away was grace.

@lollic307

4 жыл бұрын

That's awesome be proud. Its jealousy

I used to be the golden child until I woke up and broke free of my mother’s control. Now I’m the black sheep and my sister is golden. I’m fine with that. I limit my interaction with my mother as much as possible. She has wrapped my sister around her finger. It’s all good. So long as I can have peace and happiness in my life, I am good.

"They don't see people as people, they see people as things." Learning helps me. My step mom is a narcissist. Lower on the scale but I still endure the effects of what she did to me. Being on my guard is the only thing I'll ever be on around her now. Contact is low to none, which has left me lots of room to heal. Thank you for this video!

I love reading the posts as much as watching the video. It's so so strengthening to know I'm not alone with my horrible experience of a narc mother and sister. It's abuse that never changes. My choice was to move on and heal.

Right on. This is an absolutely brilliant explanation of the Narcissist parent twisting their child's psyche, destroying their sense of reality, robbing their chances for good relationships, since they will never trust themselves, never be able to fight the future manipulators that will spot their empathy and self-doubt. Thank you, Richard.

I love your description of the pen scenario. I had a roommate for many years whom I believe had some element of Narcissism (I thought for a while it might be Asperger's but his behavior was too calculated, and he enjoyed taking jabs at me). When we moved in together we each contributed elements to the living room. He had a couch and TV and I had a lamp and a table. So one day I came home and found him sitting in the dark watching TV. I asked why he hadn't turned on the lamp and he said, "Well, it's YOUR lamp." So I said that of course he could turn the lamp on. And then he repeated this scenario with other items, each time refusing to use something I'd contributed to the household until I specifically told him he could. I was baffled by this behavior -- but as time went by, I realized that this was his way of asserting his entitlement to my property. Because he forced me to say, "Yes, you can use these things," he could frame his use of them not with gratitude to me for supplying them, but as though he were doing me a favor by using my stuff!! In short: He is the guy you invite to dinner and refuses to eat, until you find yourself begging him to just have a bite of SOMETHING. So then he can act like he's doing you a favor by eating your food.

Have you ever seen the television show by the name of, "Everybody Loves Raymond?" The mother character has 2 sons (Golden Child and Black Sheep). It is a comedy but I think the show addresses this subject.

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

Of course the show clearly adresses the subject, albeit in a humorous way. But there's nothing humorous about the situation itself, it's literally hell on earth

@warm8092

4 жыл бұрын

I hated that show.

This all gets really interesting when the narc. is 80 with dementia. They are pitiful and can't be held accountable. Again, RUN, SAVE YOURSELF!

I'm sitting at my laptop writing this comment in tears. For my adult life so far my mother has abused me mentally over the course of many years and it feels so good to finally have a community of people who have dealt with the same situation as I've been suffering under for decades. My father, although I love him deeply, continues to enable my mother in her Narc ways. It feels so good to finally be released from the chains of my mother who has mentally abused me so much over the years. After a while, it gets to be too much, and the depressive episodes much to great. From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank you, Richard Grannon. From a black sheep who has been snubbed since I fell out of my mother's graces, I want to thank you. It feels so good to be free. Thank you, Richard. Thank you.

"...psychotic levels of rage." One of the first things learnt from your publications was that my instincts were not failing me. This is invaluable and validating and allowed me to begin educating myself on this topic. Thanks so much.

"It's a generational curse"

@drendabaerwolf8579

3 жыл бұрын

I broke the chain

A personal experience is feeling sorry for the narcissist because they were abused. That feeling of empathy for their own suffering can create a trap that I have fallen into for a very long time, and something I am working on right now to feel okay in drawing a line, a boundary despite their being abused. And yes, it does cause a double bind. In this it comes down to saving the self. Thank you, this is a very informative video.

I was diagnosed as an Empath/Sensitive, 12 years ago. I always thought something was strange about me, as energies around me, affected me deeply. I felt different, could feel nature, environments, people, animals.....it took a toll on me. Having learned I was an Empath actually helped me understand why I was exhausted being around others, especially large groups. As an RN, even my patient's energies affected me. I was drained. Empathic abilities made me a better nurse/caregiver, but it took a toll on me. Being an Empath with a Narcissistic mother, was heartbreaking, exhausting, confusing. The harder I tried, the more she hated me. A guy I dated, I realized was a narcissist, and I got out, immediately...then he tried to destroy my life, cuz how dare I leave HIM. Understanding who I am, setting boundaries, has helped me have peace. Oh....and I write music, play piano, oil paint, charcoal sketch, build furniture....lol....it is my creative outlet. I was the second child of 4 children, in my family. Does the Narcissist hate me more, because of my creativity?

Ugh this hits home. I was the result of an affair, so I was the black sheep, blamed for everything, ignored and hated. Meanwhile my brother was the "angel", though we were both Narcissistically abused, I also bared the physical abuse.

@carlosfurtado1164

10 жыл бұрын

Same here, but I was the 'angel' and my sister was the black sheep (even though we were never physically abused). Both our parents are narcissists. Fortunately we get along pretty well since we both know what's going on

@petejones8170

10 жыл бұрын

Korn same here, my brother is also the So called Golden child who can do no wrong even though he had a drinking and drug problem, divorced twice ,me i am married 35 years have 2 wonderful children who the family doesn't talk to, my family all turned down my sons wedding invitations to get to me, they don't speak to me for no good reason, as i never been in trouble, have a good marriage , and im hated

@TahjaiBassum

10 жыл бұрын

i'm happy that you do exist regardless of an affair. i saw your photo, and it made me smile. perhaps you are proof that something beautiful can come out of an action that wasn't so beautiful. you should be proud that you are alive. embrace it.

@wroomwroomboy123

10 жыл бұрын

wow, didn't expect to see you here. I actually watched a few of your videos about C-PTSD when I discovered articles about the damage you get from complex child trauma. Thank you! Your vids made a difference.

@laidirlive

9 жыл бұрын

My mother loathes anyone saying the "F" word for some reason beyond me but will use some swear words such as "bloody" or "shit" liberally. The words she uses could never be used by us under any circumstances. We as kids were never to utter them. I once said, "Flippen wont" as I walked out of a room and she said I had said "F'n won't" and used that as an excuse to slap me around the head and tell me off. I also once had my mouth washed out with soap and water by my Dad for saying the "F" word one day innocently which I picked up from playing with the Gypsies who had taken up residence on a field further down the road from us and who used it liberally. I didn't even know what it meant. It's ironic that people feel swearing is a crime, because swearing is nothing when compared to some crimes around the home. I myself allow my boys to swear around the home...if its good enough for me to come out with it, I feel it's only fair they use it. But we have a rule and that is to say it's not used in other company of other people if they are not that way inclined. My mother used to think anyone swearing other than herself was tantamount to evil. Goodness knows why. I'd say basically it came more from her upbringing and things done in and around their home "besides" swearing, and possibly hearing some of it reminded her of her father. That or it's just an old fashioned out dated parenting rule used by complete control freaks or your classed as useless or something for having children who are not well controlled. Could also be that they feel people who do it are insolent and "out of control" maybe because narcissists like to think children should be seen and not heard let alone heard swearing. Children are always under control, or disowned if they can't be controlled later, it is a necessity for them.

Total blind submission, or the highway explains my fathers NPD exactly. The rage, jealousy, self absorption, grandiosity, delusional thinking, inability to admit faults, splitting, obsessively controlling, the whole 9. He ticks every single trait and then some. The closest thing that compares to being around someone so tragically NPD'ed is being near someone with a serious drug addiction. This is not an exaggeration. The Narcissists drug of choice is simply "attention" of any kind. If you starve a narcissist of attention you will see some of the strangest human reactions. I'm 24. Former golden child. My brothers were treated like verbal pin cushions. Feel like i've been unplugged from the Matrix. It's quite surreal.

@RICHARDGRANNON

10 жыл бұрын

"he Narcissists drug of choice is simply "attention" of any kind. If you starve a narcissist of attention you will see some of the strangest human reactions." Nicely put.

@Exsugarbabe1

10 жыл бұрын

Sounds like my x, the damage they do is terrible but it's never their fault so they never change. My kids don't bother with him. My son was the golden child because he wasn't old enough to slag him off, my daughter is wonderfully articulate and told him exactly what she thought of him, now he doesn't bother with either of them and they seem happier and more stable for it.

@davidbroadband5519

10 жыл бұрын

And don't they love to be relied upon, to the point of engineering helplessness and dependence in others to secure their future supply. It's enough to make your guts hurt just thinking about it sometimes :/

@kimbonice

10 жыл бұрын

Sounds like my father exactly lol. I remember one time my father made my mother cry and almost got his ass kicked by my brother because he refused to acknowledge that you didn't have to pay back a grant (I needed his tax info for my free financial aid in college). He honestly talked out of his ass as if he seriously believed it even though everyone told him the difference between a loan and a grant then showed him a dictionary. And he's a freaking LOAN-SHARK on the side!!!! A loan-shark who doesn't know the difference between a loan and a grant, how unbelievably retarded that was. I'm glad I left that situation and never look back.

@RICHARDGRANNON

10 жыл бұрын

Arguing with narcs is just joyous. I recently had one go mental with me for laughing at him when he argued that a "shooting star" is literally an entire fucking star shooting across the universe visible in the night sky. I said "no dude, is just space crapola skidding into the atmos and breaking up", he would not have it. They will argue that night is day if it feeds them. Arguing with Narcs Family guy Stubborn Donkey

I definitely have a narcissistic Mother, I was the black sheep & my older brother the golden child. I never did anything right in her eyes, he did everything right. He was on the pedestal & I was beneath their feet. I was a Daddy's girl, but then my Father was murdered when I was 3. My Mom told me that she never wanted a daughter, only sons, I never did anything right, no matter how hard I tried, it was never good enough. I hated being home, ran away many times hoping a nice family would take me in & love me the way I needed to be loved. I ended up marrying the male version of my Mother, I don't do anything right in his eyes, either. I can totally relate to this video! & you did a great job, too!

@TheShellyart

9 жыл бұрын

Miracle Momma, I totally get you as I also have a narc mother and married a male version of her (although I divorced him , he always found a way to suck me in through manipulating me and threatening me to take our son away) I decided to move away from him but I am back at her home so its been a living nightmare with no end

@taraarrington2285

Жыл бұрын

I'm sorry to hear this yes narcissistic mothers like put their sons on a pedestal and then they look at their daughters like their competition or something

I live this.. and it's so hard. Black sheep empath here. Thank you for helping me understand what is happening to me.

You nailed it again! I'm the Scapegoat/black sheep - the Empathic child who got & still gets blamed for all the ill & wrongs within this sick dysfunctional 'family'. Not only this, I'm also expected to make things right/repair the damage. The pressure over the years to bend and accommodate everyone has been so damaging to my Self, couple that with witnessing the lavish treatment of the other sibling is just hideous! Loving your work!

@andreeadamask6585

6 жыл бұрын

F them

This is awesome. I'm now No Contact with my narc mum for 2 years. I am the scapegoat and black sheep. I'm now living my life while golden child lives with my mum lolol

Thank you so much! I'm 21 and I'm the daughter of a Narcissistic Mother. I've only just come to terms with this as well, i never really had a name, a label for what was happening and for SUCH A LONG TIME I thought I was the one who was wrong, only recently I've realised that everything she's doing/done is all just apart of her narcissistic personality. Wish I'd found this video sooner! I'm the "black sheep" child, nothing I've ever done or ever do is good, and i'm ALWAYS the escape goat. This is starting to sound like a rant but honestly, I'm just explaining how this has made so much sense to my situation, thank you! I feel like I have a better grasp of understanding what's happening/has been happening for the past nearly 14 years. THANK YOU!

@joannewilson1021

9 жыл бұрын

What's sad is that everything is motivated by agenda. It gets tiring to always be one step ahead of them for your own sanity, and in my family and job I'm surrounded by at least 5 narcissists. Ha, because my new dog wouldn't come to my sister in law who thinks she's Snow White and that animals are magically drawn to her, she snidely commented "well, your dog's not very loyal, he goes to anyone" Only because he went to everyone else in the room but her, he probably could sense her passive/aggressive vibe.

@naturalallnaturalwhitepist1789

6 жыл бұрын

Kathy Stapeling I'm 23, I feel like we're extremely lucky to realise this early and have to chance to go no contact and still have our whole lives to build our own family. Notice that most comments are from 40/50 yr olds so we're extremely lucky

My mother is a classic narcissist. I'm 40 and didn't even realise it or have a name for it until last year. I need to be honest here, I do wonder if I have some narcissist qualities myself. I tried to make a conscious effort to make sure my children knew and know their feelings are valid, but there have been times , especially when they were little and I hadnt learned coping strategies or self help-that I was not always there for them emotionally. I feel a lot of guilt about this and do have to make a conscious effort to ensure they feel worthy. It doesn't come naturally to me. I don't know if it's because I could have narcissist traits, or because I wasn't shown it myself.

@ruby-qv5bd

4 жыл бұрын

Oh how I can relate to what you are saying. I know I wasn't always able to give what I didn't get. It stinks coming out of a dysfunctional family and trying to do your best as a parent. I know I loved my children deeply, but I am certain that I didn't always give them what they needed. I was still needing from the lack of what I was neglected. It is all too much. What family isn't suffering from some form of nuts? So sad that we as a society don't try and make raising children correctly a real priority by teaching starting in high school how the brain forms and what is needed from the beginning of life.

Omg. This video just changed my entire life. You described my father. It’s like you’ve known him for years. Today, I realized I grew up with a narcissistic parent, and it explains SO MUCH. I’m almost 40, and am just now piecing it all together. Wow. 🤯 I’m not crazy after all... What a revelation!

Or being the "black sheep", you can entirely be ignored both emotionally and physically, and anyone who tries to support you (either family or simple friends) they will seek your support out and snuff them out like a light. I've had doctors called and yelled at, family members shunned for talking to me, and even friends intimidated to continue friendship with me. I'm guessing this is one way of keeping a "black sheep" in line. :/

@Jana-kj5tj

4 жыл бұрын

theclanplus1 thank you.

I married into a family of textbook narcissists and you sir are so spot on! Thank you so much for this video and helping to set me free from these parasitic vampires!

You know whats a really complicated situation, being the golden child and the black sheep.

@gzig7844

7 жыл бұрын

MrDeadSea777 Secondary GC to replacement black sheep after she left. I still feel happy at the memory of helping her run away :)

@dougday206

3 жыл бұрын

Yoooooo same!

Mate you are without a doubt smack bang on the button in everyway here. I lost count how many times i sniggered with amazement to myself as your words and my memories triggered again & again. You're so accurate in every detail, you literally described my life from at least 5 years old to present, I'm 33 now. I was unsure whether my mother is, my father was and my siblings are, but after this i am absolutely 100% certain. At 19:40, you confirmed something i have thought about now for quite a while but thought i was being presumptuous and paranoid!! It just punched me in the gut, but really did make me happy that i was correct in what i was instinctively experiencing!! You got this well & truly sussed!! I'd gladly pay you for sessions like this. Quality!! Cheers buddy =)

Psychic demolition of our inner being, that's their (Narc/psycho's) end game. Thanks for your videos they're Zenning a lot of old non-local programmes that are still running in the background. Thank you!

Man, you know my mother well. Thank you for your insights and your strength of character. And humanity.

Thank you so much! I have been the black sheep all of my life and now I understand why I attract these people in my life. I have been trying to focus on healing myself spiritually, but blindly. I have always understood that my family did the "splitting" thing, and my sister loves it! She is also a narc and plays these mind games all of the time. It always hurts so bad and I really never understood why she did this. I guess with my mother and father I became used to it. I left an abusive relationship with a narc and everyone seemed to blame me, as if I created the whole situation. I now feel like I have more clarity and can try to be a little more careful and aware of who I allow in my life. Thank you for bringing this empath some peace!

triangulation is used between siblings

@lisalisgarciavillegas1178

5 жыл бұрын

Word....!!!So TRUE!!! TWISTED & EXHAUSTING !!!

@lynndalou9838

4 жыл бұрын

yep

@surgicaltoolboxrnhealthbea3292

4 жыл бұрын

E Oldfield yes I indeed none of my siblings talk anymore.

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

"triangulation is used between siblings".. Indeed!

@lynndalou9838

4 жыл бұрын

most definitley! NO relationship with my living sister whom has been fed tales and hate and lies about me and had little with my deceased sister, with her golden child who died at 38, She cannot have us all talking and getting along, she is the center!

I have perfect example of reflaming. One times, I did my ex a favor by taking his daughters out for a fun event. After, at first he was thankful, then he insulted me in front of them, mocked me. I left in tears. Next day, I sent txt, saying, w/o rationalization, and justification, I would like to talk to him. But he had the audacity to call my text Abusive! I was shock! I did him a favor. He projected his abuse on to me! And he shamelessly used his kids to promote his rant.

In my family the golden child was the one who became schizophrenic, literally.

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

You cannot develop schizophrenia. It's hereditary..

All this time I thought my mother was possess by a demon! Seriously!!! I was the bad sheep of family no matter what I did. What you say is correct. I attract these people like honey. Thank you Richard Grannon.

@nunyabizzz1135

6 жыл бұрын

Grace Robertson My mother is a maniac. even today she felt the need to tell me how her friends bf is always all over her. these are 67 yr old ppl!!! give me a break. but i was always treated like shit and my older sister was the golden child and i was blamed for everything. my mother is a real bitch and i had a horrible childhood

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

Demons aren't real. Narcissists, sociopaths & psychopaths are very real, however. But they're just people. Evil people for sure, but people nonetheless

Every time I attempt to move on with my life, my NPD mother comes swooping in. I just discovered a web page where she's posted several hurtful things about me. We've been estranged for 4 years. I left because of her behaviour. Whenever I 'went back' to her, she'd promise things would be better but she would pull her usual stunt. My question is; what does she want? She pushes me away, telling me to fuck off when I'm in her life, and then angrily demands I come back to her when I stop contact. It must just be control. Or at least the illusion of it.

@comanchio1976

10 жыл бұрын

I think that like any relationship, when it becomes more destructive and detrimental than otherwise, then there's no sense in its continuation. If you don't want to permanently cut her out of your life altogether, at least back off to some extent when you see a recurrence of the destructive behaviour, our even the recognisable antecedents. That way, even if she doesn't understand her behaviour or their causes, (as most people don't) she'll at least get the negative reinforcement that will hopefully come when contact is interrupted.

@aprilk2858

10 жыл бұрын

comanchio1976 I totally agree with that first sentence. We just cannot get along. I'm never good enough for her. And, without sounding whiney, she's done a few things that I honestly don't know if I can forgive her for. I don't feel safe around her. She's evil. And I'm very happy to continue living my life without her in it, always trying to tear me down.

@comanchio1976

10 жыл бұрын

April M Good for you! Sometimes there's no alternative

@NoPunches

10 жыл бұрын

April M Narcissists are jealous of everybody. Just keep in mind that avarice is one of the deadly sins. And really, detraction is a type of murder of someone's reputation. How terrible it is for a parent to not only not do their duty of being a parent, but to detract against their own children! Anyone who hears or reads what she says ought to consider the source: a detractor. Even so, it is damaging in many ways. The best thing is to FORGIVE HER not be like her, pray for her, but keep her at arms length. But forgiving someone doesn't mean that it repairs their damage. That is THEIR responsibility to YOU, not yours to them, and it must be proven and demonstrated with consistency. Since this is your mother who is doing this, I recommend also praying for self-esteem in order to do God's Holy Will in your own life. God bless you and Mary keep you!

@NoPunches

10 жыл бұрын

NoPunches Some families have more than one npd, or at least, more than one who suffers from grave level avarice. Forgive them in order to move on away from them with strength, but unless they are sincere in their apology, meaning, they acknowledge the damage they've done and take responsibility for it, you don't have to tell them that you forgive them. Sometimes, telling a person who takes advantage of your kindness that you forgive them just makes them think they can do it again. Forgive them, though, for your own sake, firstly.

I just watched your video again, as I do many of your videos. As I am identifying the abusers and either calling them out or walking away, I have found that your presentations really help to pinpoint what the hell is going on. I feel that I am spiraling up and out of a lifetime of shit, and I am amazed at how subtle this abuse can be. I am finally!!!!!!!! yeah!!!!!!!! no longer feeling guilty about my mother. I have reached the stage where I see her as pathetic and weak. She can not and will not take responsibility for her emotions and actions, even overlooking the sexual abuse by my brother toward me. What contributes to her blindness is what I call the "old fishing village" mentality that the boys can do no wrong. As the only female sibling in the family, I was targeted as the scapegoat...a life of doubt, pain, and self punishment. My head is above water, and my life is changing. I am starting to feel some degree of being happy that I'm alive. It is not an easy task to remake your life when you're facing 60. I know that it's not easy at any age, but it can be done. I am now empty handed and free. Thank you for doing what you do! Your work touches many people who might have otherwise continued to suffer such misery. Much love to you!

@serenarossi8480

8 жыл бұрын

So moving! happy you are getting out of it.bravo!

@klueboy13

8 жыл бұрын

+Grace Colleen so proud of you! We are so strong and it's remarkable for all survivors to keep pushing forward where we can understand and free ourselves for a brighter tomorrow. Much thanks to SpartanLifeCoach also!

@ruby-qv5bd

5 жыл бұрын

I am 3 years later responding to your comment. I am almost 60 myself and I know just how you were feeling because I am feeling it myself, too. Oh my gosh, this is the worst feeling. I feel I need help, but feel it's a bit late for me now. I've already lived through the crap and somehow raised three boys which seem to be doing well, although I have such guilt of having them suffer because I was suffering. Oh my gosh, this is crazy crap. I lived the life of pain and emotional abuse, neglect all disguised. I always knew things were so disturbed, but kept on talking myself out of it in order to have a family. I am at this time no contact and trying to get my life back to goodness. After the abuse from a family like this, you feel insane. It sucks for sure. I am not really seeing clearly yet, but working on it day by day. Awful. Hope that you are doing better in your life at this time.

@bubblywaters3116

5 жыл бұрын

Oh my gosh I so feel your pain. Same with me, mom and abusive brother. I feel you just explained my scenario. I'm so sorry. I hope you heal and have no contact. I wish you strength and success. Hugs

l don't have siblings but l was still a black sheep and everyone was better than me according to my mother. My self esteem was completely destroyed and l thought l didn't deserve anything good in life. She still thinks l'm the bad one and she's good, l'm wrong she's right, l finally understood she will never change but l can change my life getting away from her

"What do want this time?" - my dad every time I did or accomplished anything. The stories I could tell you, young man.

amazing insights. I was raised by a narc mother, eventually married her carbon copy and then spent five yrs with another narc who used me for supply. Your videos have shed some much needed light and much needed tactics to use in defense of the onslaught of the narcs in my life. It's been brutal growing up as the black sheep to a NM and the marriage was equally as brutal. i am hoping with enough self discovery, I will be able to free myself of the narc behavior pattern as I seem to attract narcs. I will re watch this video again and again until I understand more about Narc behavior. I have CPTSD due to childhood trauma, watched your videos on that as well. Thanks for doing what you do. Love and Light, Anna.

This is SIMPLY AMAZING! I FINALLY found at least some HOPE to start understanding what is happening throughout my entire life! I feel like I have had an epiphany.. I now, finally have a NAME for her - narcissist. and so many other things that you hit the nail on that has helped me pin point areas I could never explain to anyone. WOW... for the first time in a long time I feel like I can breath as I have an explanation of what I've been dealing with! ITS NOT *ME* - what she's been doing IS A REAL THING!!! . THANK YOU!! I WILL be going through all your video's now... if they speak to me as this one did it will seriously be the most profound help Ive ever received. Your amazing. I have so much gratitude!!

@AnAlbertaGirl

9 жыл бұрын

***** does it ever. These past few hours a storm of memories are flooding back - but now I am seeing them in a new light... Simply having this term to call it has opened an entirely new world to understanding what I went and am still going through.. and that I am not alone and the best news of my life - I AM NOT CRAZY after all. Sigh...

My mother was so bad I had envy for Joan Crawford's daughter but I finally walked away and now my mother chases me but I am gone I changed my name etc etc it was a long journey

@annwethenorth

8 жыл бұрын

+Clem Burke I had Mommie Dearest too! I've moved away, but now it's mostly via email. I totally hear you!

@Clemburke1111

8 жыл бұрын

Good for you :)

@annwethenorth

8 жыл бұрын

Thank you

@witchywisdom4505

6 жыл бұрын

CONGRATS!!

@aviniciussouza100

4 жыл бұрын

Envy for what?

Omg! Thank you! ♡ I'm the black sheep of my family....I even got a reminder of it tatooed on my back. Well, instead o a black sheep, I have a black swan with a crown..but its stilk on in the same. I thank you for helping us. I feel alone often bit watching this video u provided makes me feel not so alone.Maybe u could make a video about how some ppl feel alone even in a relationship. .

@Stigmatix666

4 жыл бұрын

Thanx. I'm gonna get a tattoo of a black sheep. No, I'm not being sarcastic, I AM the black sheep

Brother, thank you! this is GOD sent, GOD sent and no other.

All of your videos on Narcissism are so accurate to me. I find myself denying what you, Richard, are saying only to get a flashback proving you right a couple of seconds later. It is such a shame that parent roles in families are so disturbed. I thought I was a paranoid schizophrenic with suicidal tendencies until I forced myself out of my home. Due to circumstances I moved back in for a couple of months only to be engulfed in the same feelings. My road to recovery is a long one. Thank you for all of your Help.

My sister (only sib) was the Golden Child, until I left home when she was 17. She got full brunt of our narc mother's fury. Sister still says she was angry with me for leaving and not being there to protect her.

@linncosby4060

7 жыл бұрын

+Tom Leykis Fan i suffered the same as those above. my mother recently died and i just cannnot grieve for her just numb

OMG you just described my entire family. (Y)

"I been crawling on my belly, clearing out what could have been. I been wallowing in my own confused and insecure delusions, for a piece to cross me over, or a word to guide me in. I want to feel the changes coming down, I wanna know what I been hidinng. In my Shadow." Tool said it better than I can. This is my goal. To take out the trash she piled into my mind through my ears and into my body with her fists.

My Mother has NPD so badly, that she (I am very disabled) that she phones from 800 miles away, my doctor's, pharmacies, and my friends (she finds one person who falls for her "I am so concerned about my daughter routine and gets names and numbers), and tells them there is nothing wrong with me, that I don't need drugs, don't help me, and god forbid;don't give me money! She has now started that with my kids ages 22,23!! The stress has caused me almost another nervous breakdown from her!! I won't let it, this time, I am staying silent, because she does "Lies" and says she doesn't do these things!!!

@shoesandboots3218

7 жыл бұрын

my mom too

@christinehuntington3767

7 жыл бұрын

my parents, mainly because of my mother's hatred of my father were abusive to each other putting mainly me the middle child into anxiety and depression I was afraid of her running away from us where I wld sit on porch alone and cry until she returned with no concern for the toll she put on me as this child... to this day fast forward .. she won't help me out of an abusive relationship and she says it's not her problem....and my sister whom I helped raise and love her child...is my mom's golden child.. who puts me down where all u ask is understanding and love. they don't like that I point out their cruelty.

You have to see the dark, before you can see the light. Thank you so much, to all of you. Bless xxx

Dude, best advice i've ever had. I really needed that, you are so correct it's brilliant. People who do live in the light may need to pick their own spirits up through happy positive things and slowly wipe and destroy the side of which the wrong one is trying to draw out of you. The worst thing is these people can also play the victim to a tee just to lure you in- don't fall prey kind hearts.

@Melanie3ella

10 жыл бұрын

Thank you for the support.

This sounds like my mother

Yes! This is spot on, thank you. My mom decided that I was going to be the black sheep because I was a narcissistic person (at 2 years old). No attention went my way, no matter how "good" I was. I confronted her as a child why she wouldn't celebrate my good grades like she does with my sisters. My mother claims that she would only hurt my sisters because they weren't able to do as well as I did. So I got this message that I was "too special" and any attention to me would bring others down. She claims that she feared I would become a narsissist like my father, since he always put her down. I got blamed for being envious of my sisters/or others when I would ask for fairness. I always felt like a bad daughter, and so blessed to have her.... now, I'm angry, but the strings she bond me with "guilt" still hold me back. I know I'm arrogant at times and bossy, but I wonder how much is genetic and how much was learned?

@taraarrington2285

Жыл бұрын

They do this to justify their treatment of you I remember my mom saying things to me like that to like well I don't worry about you I know wherever you go you'll know how to work and you'll be able to keep a job and you'll be able to take care of yourself 🤷

It's refreshing to hear a person acknowledging the darkness, and not expecting a person to pretend it doesn't exist. Being hurt and walking away from abuse, and then purposefully healing should serve to show a person how strong they really are. I agree, and found in my own experience, showing weakness draws them to you. They also are constantly recreating drama to get supply. They hate strong independent people, and will attack them un provoked, just to create reactions from people to justify how they feel. They are like reverse empaths, they aren't happy unless they have made everyone around them miserable. The picture of them feeding on the pain of others also resonated. I think it's important and vital for empathic people to remain objective when interacting with others.

My mother-in-law is a narcissist. This is what my husband dealt with.

Brilliant guy. Yes, the narcissist is master manipulator (the pen example )...

@gzig7844

7 жыл бұрын

Adernn Nider lol @ the f£&¥ up Richard did

Good book, "Knots" by R.D. Laing. Shows psychological knots parents put their kids in to cause problems.

@slickfirmament5934

5 жыл бұрын

good to hear that artie lange is doing better.

I have a son, he now is 21 years old but as i was raising him as a single mother, i had my mother and sister whom are Narcissists in my life. At the time i did not even know about this mental illness and thought that they loved to see me and my son. When he was a toddler, one time i gave my mother a photo of my son to put in an empty frame she had/she said she can use for it. Just to note, both my mother and my sister used to hang together a " a lot " I am the Blacksheep they are Narcs. My sister is vain and found herself an old rich man to take good care of her - her beauty got her a nice way of life - she owns four houses to note. Well, to continue, when i went to my mothers house about two weeks later for a visit, the photo of my son ( in the frame ) was taken out and replaced with a photo of my sisters DOG. I said Mom ! Where is Ryan's picture ??? She simply and calmly said. " I have it " I let it go BUT when i went back the next week That picture of the DOG was then taken out and replaced again with a photo of my SISTER of her doing Karate -- At that time the rich man paid for her lessons and she because a Black Belt --. I am sensitive and they know it ! -- I am hurt about them doing that with my son' s picture. The both of them till this very day refused to admit that they exchanged the photo - My mother said she did not do it and my sister said she did not do it . SO SAD -- My sister had to be the initiator in order for the picture of HER DOG AND HER SELF to go into that frame in the first place -- What do you think ?? Was she just jealous of me having a son ? OR what is that about ? -- I hate what they are ! I am still hurt that they disrespected my son in this way as to let him see what they did with his picture.

@mgmail7279

8 жыл бұрын

+OceanSound100 Yup, that's narcissists. I sent my mother pics for years. She had a large table with photos in frames (some that I'd given her) filled with photos of everything to do with her golden children. Mother used that same line as yours when I asked about my photos: "I have them." After decades, I now will never give her any pics of me.

@OceanSound100

8 жыл бұрын

+M gmail I am working hard on staying away from her and my sister - If i go to see my mother, I then will be also seeing my sister as they live together and I just am not emotionally ready for any of their attacks again. I hope you too are coming along with the reality of them - I see you are studying on it here with SpartanLifeCoach. His videos have a lot to offer us. It is sad but hollidays, i am staying home without any of my family. I have a lot to work out in me. Best to you too !

@mgmail7279

8 жыл бұрын

Isn't it better to spend a holiday alone (or in your case hopefully with your son) rather than with people who put us down? Let's keep plodding forward! Best to you too!

@OceanSound100

8 жыл бұрын

+M gmail Yes , IT IS BETTER - See ya around :)

@knowledgecopes7714

8 жыл бұрын

This is not a illness!your mother and sister are a piece of s-h-i-t

Ive grown up as the black sheep in my family. I drove over 2,000 miles away to the oil field in north dakota to escape. They were always getting me counselors and trying to "fix me" and completely unable to indentify the whole cycle of behavior that encompasses the whole family. I think my parents really thought that peoples problems were "individual" but that was way after I blew the alcoholic's cover (mom and brother) some dark shit indeed, but I take solace in relating to others about it. Thanks for the video

17:04 Golden advice. Non Contact is the only solution. Thanks for the vid.

Hi Richard. I have seen almost all of your videos for the last 4 days. I have been looking for this for 35 years,. never knew I had a covert narssisist/histrionic parent. Thougt all the way, I was the problem. This is life folding out like a flower to me. I feel saved. Thank you so much, with all my heart. I have peoplepleaser syndrom like... and I retreat from people all the time, but... I was the golden child. My brother was the black sheep, but he never took the red pill, so I don`t know how he feels. Hope this is helpfull. Thanks again, I feel you saved my lie.

Every know and than my mom has a random breakdown when no ones really “listening to her” moving in in life (doing good for them self) and in Front of everybody cries and talks about her hardships and everything she went through for her kids and everybody feels guilty and sitting there not knowing what to do. She just did this so I need to watch this so I know there’s someone who can related to

You make me howl, your candid nature is pure Liverpool..You have turned what once was the darkest of challenges for me into something of pure brilliance..... . Narcissistic vampires turn to dust... My empathic smile now radiates the promise of the light of the dawn... Bless you brother...

All authority is evil! LOL...never give up your inner rebel!

@NoPunches

10 жыл бұрын

That makes no sense. There is authority in the world that protects you and provides you opportunity, even life. Not all authority is abusive.

@Thyalwaysseek

10 жыл бұрын

NoPunches Bullshit!!! Fuck ALL authority and slaves who bend over and take it up the arse like good little sheep....God is the only authority and you will soon learn that the hard way.

@TheBlabla1996

10 жыл бұрын

Thyalwaysseek Fuck authority & Fuck god :)

@Thyalwaysseek

10 жыл бұрын

Mitchell HürenKampf Yeh well good luck with the God part.

@theaddreport

10 жыл бұрын

Mitchell HürenKampf Wooohoooooo!

I have never realized my mother was this way in my life. My God. She was jealous of the relationship between my father and I in subtle ways which we both subtly (my father and I) gently seem to recognize and help manage, and I never really understood that and felt it to be very strange. My brother is certainly the favorite child, but not overtly so. My mother hates to be touched and I never understood why. I thought she was just sensitive but that is a symptom. I'm extremely empathic. I have noticed that as an adult when I see my mother she always tells me a sstory (news story, something sad) that makes me cry. I noticed this pattern but thought she was very sensitive and couldnt help but talk about this story that deeply affected her, now I feel like she feeds off of that sadness. She will also declare that she "HATES" someone and I've noticed lately if I will not agree with her she treats me like the enemy. When I was a child she always told me emphatically that she was perfect and she knew everything. I felt as though she was just trying to make me feel secure but now as a mother with a young child myself I feel that's a very strange thing to tell a child. I would not tell my son I'm perfect. No one is perfect or knows everything. As I grow older I can see ways that she was very jealous if my father showed me affection. I noticed that over the years we have sort of been trained not to even hug (my father and I) if she's in the room. I noticed because we were about to have a casual hug as I has leaving and we both hesitated when she walked in the room. It's something I never really picked up on consciously and we've never talked about. I do have HUGE issues with authority and so not trust people in positions of authority. If I was ever emotional I was mocked which at the time seemed like she was just trying to get me over it but now seems cruel as I look at my own son and how I could never be so dismissive.VERY passive aggressive woman, interesting to see this perspective.She was extremely self critical. Her only self talk was about how much she hated her body and how bad she looked, she always told me I was beautiful though. what a mind trip

@MarionBrandsen6204

7 жыл бұрын

OMG , just read this and my story is so the same! I am an only child and my mother has always been jealous of the relationship between my father and me. I was feeling terrible as a child, I did not know what to expect when I came home from school because her behaviour was different every day. When there were people at our house she was so sweet and caring and when we were alone she was acting like I was the worst child in the world. She always acted like she cared about everyone and did so much for people but looking back I do not think she had real feelings at all. When I had problems it was always my own fault, she never backed me up. My father did. When I got older and got stronger and left the house she manipulated me so that I would feel guilty about things. And I did not know what those things were. Because I was an only child I called home every week and then she made me feel like it was too much to talk to me, there was always something she had to see on TV or she had no time etc. She knew I was insecure about my weight and she made a point of it to tell me her size with a big smile on her face. And I can go on and on about all the things she did and how she made me feel. She almost drove my boyfriend away saying what a bad person I was. One time she met another couple on holiday and she could not stop talking about the man and how handsome and nice he was. That went on for years and she did not even think about how it would make my father feel. I am now 54 but I am still sometimes insecure and so afraid to hurt people because I know how it feels.

@clownpagne

7 жыл бұрын

Caylie Kess It's comforting to know I'm not alone. I think my mum never liked the affection my father and I had. When he was dying I came to their house a few hours everyday for 2 months. Looks like she didn't like me to be around but never told me even I asked her cause I noticed something strange... Very sad.

@lillyputin4147

7 жыл бұрын

I have a mother like that as well. And guess what? When she makes you cry she is doing it because it makes her feel good to see you in pain. Sicko. Just like my mother.

@MarionBrandsen6204

7 жыл бұрын

same here, my father was in the hospital having heartsurgery, she made it her job preventing me from visiting and started a fight when I was there blaming it on me for being a horrible child doing this while my father was in the hospital

@reesedaniel5835

6 жыл бұрын

My mother not only was jealous of my Dad and me, she turned him completely against me by the time I was a teenager. And our relationship never recovered. She turned him into a Zombie the last 5 years of his miserable existence with her and I went no contact after waking up to her covert narcissism. He died exactly 9 months later. I think she murdered him to get me to break no contact for the funeral but I didn't go. It was so utterly heartbreaking because the little girl inside me still hoped and longed for the daddy that she stole from me. I cried for a solid week and couldn't eat a bit of food for at least 4 days straight. And I'm sure while I was crying and heartbroken and couldn't sleep or eat, her and my Golden Child brother made everyone at the funeral think I didn't care at all being the "horrible person" that I am.

Thanks again for giving of your time and knowledge! I was made the 'black sheep' by a narcissistic mother and wasted so many years of my life trying to figure out what was wrong with me! I now that the problem was her! I also liked the story of the rabbit in the hole being sought by the fox. It explains why I have attracted other narcs whom I initially thought were there to help and it was not until too late that they were feeding their narcissism. Thanks Again

Be careful about showing weakness in front of narcissists. "When the rabbit falls into the trap, the fox comes running, but not to help, not to help!..." Very good point. "The shark goes for the blood in the water." Some people feed on weakness, they enjoy seeing others suffer and will even do whatever they can to bring this about. "It's a sad thing to have to tell people as a generic piece of psychological coaching for life that you might need to raise your guard a little bit higher. You can't trust everybody who comes into your environment. There are some very disturbed individuals out there." Very good advice! Thank you! We make the mistake of thinking that others think, feel and behave like us, that they have positive intentions and want the best for others. This is most definitely not always the case! Unfortunately, some people are deeply and inherently sadistic and are best avoided.

Ive been wondering for years about the 'why me' and why 'why is this happening' and this has actually really helped me understand and/or think differently. Thanks for this. :)

Thanks so much for all the clarity, yes, yes,yes, very hard cycles of abuse to break but with intelligent and thoughtful people like you there is hope.

This share is spot on... Love the way you bring the truth into the light... It's just a shame the ego wants us all to live in darkness! Be gentle with yourself and the ones you love... Always!

I had a narcissistic mother and I was the golden child. I just want to add something here to help the black sheep understand something about the role of golden child. I was abused, as my sister was, but the difference was that I was used like an cherished object (my sister was lucky, as she was ignored). I was an extremely sensitive, shy child with huge social phobias and I had to be perfect for my mother. (which of course is impossible unless you kill off most of your self). My mother was an extreme extrovert. She would take me to public gatherings and humiliate me by talking about me and showing me off. I had to be like a robot and turn off all of my feelings. I would disassociate and had bouts of amnesia as a result. I started to rebel when I was 14 - my rebellion consisted of my standing up for myself. After that my mother systematically took revenge against me and ruined my life. I had to run away from home at 16 because of the violence. She would actually go to my places of work and befriend my bosses and turn them against me too. There were numerous ways she got revenge. It wasn't until I banished her from my life for six years (thirty-five years later) that I was able to find my way. So being the golden child is not as "privileged" as the black sheep thinks it is. And I ended up being the bigger black sheep because I couldn't carry the burden my mother placed on me.

@RICHARDGRANNON

10 жыл бұрын

I have seen numerous cases where the "golden child" is the one targetted for abuse. Being either black or golden is an unhealthy place to be, means the parent is playing games and moving their kids like peices on a chessboard. But thats what happens when people emotionally undeveloped have children just to fuflill their sense of self. "People are not things!" - The empaths motto.

@Lintbrush1

10 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your comment Spartanlifecoach. I like the motto.

Thank you for this video!! My father ruined a holiday we had together and since we got back has blamed me for it and gone completely no contact himself, even refusing to answer the door to me! And you know what? I’ve had one of the most stress free wonderful years of my life since! 😊 And it’s only watching your videos that have really shone a light on why he behaves like he does, and also why I feel so free now that he’s no longer a constant presence in my life. Thank you so much ☺️

This is incredible. Both of my parents are straight up narcissists. I am 50 years old and learning more about this and all the pieces are coming together. Thanks so much. This has helped me a lot.

@angelaburton4712

5 жыл бұрын

Have you read the book called "In comfort of Mary" by Bethany Ford its on Amazon and when you look it up always put the authors name in as well as the title of the book and its now on KZread now and you can read chapter one on KZread now and it's all about healing and how to move on with your life after physical, emotional, neglect, mental, sexual, verbal abuse. Bethany had to choose her children over her mother and her mother thought Bethany would pick her but she was wrong and she was nasty about it not understanding why, she slapped Bethany across her face in front of her children saying I wish you lot dead, then walked out of their lives forever and Bethany had to be strong enough for her children.

Just thank you !! I'm overwhelmed by the input and knowledge on your channel , thank you from Anglesey North Wales💞

Is anyone an “INJF”??? Great video... you are straight eye candy bro! Love, America

@TonyCannuli

4 жыл бұрын

Laura Elzey INFJ😊