"I COULD'VE BEEN KILLED!" "So? You'd have still lost." James is too funny

@posterunkowytv

Жыл бұрын

HE SHOULD HAVE LOST 19 POINTS AND GET NAUGHT

@hi-viz

Жыл бұрын

It's even funnier how that was the last episode before his dragster crash

@SanderDoesThings

Жыл бұрын

14:30

@kurtlagon2023

Жыл бұрын

"Your van rolled OVER!"

@tylerdiesel2265

10 ай бұрын

@@posterunkowytvbj

Welcome back to Top Gear where the points are made up and the rules don't matter.

@dbclass4075

2 жыл бұрын

Because the producers have said...

@badernajeeb4114

2 жыл бұрын

Nice reference to Drew Carrey's Improva-ganza

@scsutton1

2 жыл бұрын

Whose Gear Is It Anyway?

@badernajeeb4114

2 жыл бұрын

@@scsutton1 perfect

@EnforcerX71

2 жыл бұрын

@@badernajeeb4114 Whose Line is it Anyway was a UK show before it was in the USA.

1:34 i love it takes everyone a second to register the fact that hammond actually ate a piece of paper just so he wouldn't have to prove that it said jereny's score was 1 point less than his

@myrixica4222

2 жыл бұрын

I love how clearly unscripted it was.

@derek385

2 жыл бұрын

it nomal,we see him eat a picture of a car because of not wanting it to be on the cool section of the cool wall

@dattroll2019

2 жыл бұрын

@@derek385 oh yea, guess he just doesn't like being proven wrong

@petecoventry6858

Жыл бұрын

But his score was 178 would you like a calculator? if real it was a draw

@lunika1418

Жыл бұрын

@@derek385 i

"ONE POUND" one of my favourite top gear lines

@thegeforce6625

25 күн бұрын

Yeah same

31:32 Man, I've been looking for that clip everywhere. James' dance is a sight to behold.

@andrihusainsudra

2 жыл бұрын

he's [The Winner]

@mfw9902

2 жыл бұрын

The little skip into the slide just did it for me, perfect victory dance

@craftstragames3817

2 жыл бұрын

His Dance is great

@xSupra

Жыл бұрын

That transition to giving the L is just golden

@layonyatsu7203

Жыл бұрын

Bro is emoting 😂😂😂

8:02 the fact that jeremy celebrated his win quite early to the point that he didn't even realized that he forgot to put the minus symbol, so technically, Hammond won that.

@joempoem478

Жыл бұрын

Well he still won..

@Nathaniel2256Studios

Жыл бұрын

He was probably in a rush to put the total down.

Next one should be a “we can edit that out” compilation

@polishavgeek1849

2 жыл бұрын

Somebody's made that already

@Mustang150y

2 жыл бұрын

Done it kzread.info/dash/bejne/aauf19qDiMXWn7g.html

@fredsigu6684

2 жыл бұрын

@@Mustang150y insane. I know what I'm doing for a bit lol

@daves5067

2 жыл бұрын

@@Mustang150y I.

@sanderhaugestrand5512

2 жыл бұрын

@@Mustang150y (hohohghh

Ive just happened to get minus the number of point that i already had

@rassrevenger5060

2 жыл бұрын

"yes"

@Shakes-Off-Fear

2 жыл бұрын

Funniest thing is that that’s happened more than once

James’ Cheeseburger line still has me crying with laughter to this day

@egealtun3545

2 жыл бұрын

I think I missed that, can you tell me where is that line in the video?

@dinamitemaster

2 жыл бұрын

@@egealtun3545 9:29

@egealtun3545

2 жыл бұрын

@@dinamitemaster Thank you!

@michaelcurtin524

2 жыл бұрын

I wonder how many times James had to practice that in order to say "Or you're going to die on the bog trying to get 500 cheeseburgers out of your poo chute." Without laughing

@chillingbing6937

Жыл бұрын

I'm still learning English, can anyone tell me what's so funny about this bit?

James's victory dance at 31:32 is my new favourite thing

@Jace888

9 ай бұрын

I wonder if Gangnam style was invented then. There was a video on it with that song and this victory dance. haha

35:35 I love how Jeremy's "genius" is mostly used as a joke but in this situation he was actually brilliant.

@kylefarrell849

Жыл бұрын

Also when he brought a car for £1

@danielvandam

11 ай бұрын

That must have cost more to make though, doubt he did it himself 😂

@HappyBeezerStudios

6 ай бұрын

And only 600 for the engine table and the pair of chairs? Porsche engine tables go for way way more nowadays.

7:45 I love how Jeremy goes from laughy and happy to genuinely shocked

@justforever96

Жыл бұрын

Dude, it is a script. They were it, they rehearse it. He is not shocked at all. He is an actor.

@RedJLP

Жыл бұрын

@@justforever96 So according to you, he approaches recording narration with Richard Porter like portraying Harv in the UK exclusive release of the first Cars movie

Top Gear; fully immersed in their scores Grand Tour; YEET

7:47 that sheer shock from Clarkson’s face is golden 🤣

@JetFalcon710

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah, lol, I too am wondering how Hammond got nine out of like 150

@farhanatashiga3721

2 жыл бұрын

@@JetFalcon710 well his car didn't work, they had to work together to conceal his towing line to even get to the event

@JetFalcon710

2 жыл бұрын

@@farhanatashiga3721 Oh right

I did actually help James May win with that unboxing-a-car thing. It was just so ridiculous a thing that I couldn't help it, even though Dave Souffle was very funny.

@Ethan-Entah

2 жыл бұрын

He kind of cheated by putting it on drivetribe, however the joy I feel everytime he I hear him say Thousand! knowing I was one of them makes up for it & some.

@FalloutJack

2 жыл бұрын

@@Ethan-Entah I mean, if there wasn't a rule against it... (Let's be honest here, though. Drivetribe *helped him* host the video. Because you know if it was him alone, he'd be like "Oh, I've done this wrong.", and then later we'd have him telling Jeremy and Richard how Amazon hit him with a DMCA takedown or something.)

@JzanderN

2 жыл бұрын

@@Ethan-Entah They might have used the one from his own KZread channel. That's the one I watched it on.

@fabiank485

2 жыл бұрын

@@JzanderN me too, the one on drivetribe had way more views

@kaitlyngarner740

Жыл бұрын

The thing is if Jeremy actually added up the views from all 5 david souffle vids and not just used his 1st one, he probably would have won

I'm proud to say I was one of the 330,000 who watched James take a Yaris out of a big box

I'm amazed Jeremy Clarkson got a Volvo for a quid.

@jamiemarshall6832

2 жыл бұрын

@Josh Fairweather only Clarkson would that

@DrewSavo

2 жыл бұрын

I remember this episode. He explains why after. He got a friend of his to go to a Volvo main dealer, who’d taken the car as part exchange and was looking at a cost of £150 (at the time) to have the car scrapped. So she goes ‘I’ll give you a quid for it’, and presto he’s £151 up.

@SplicerOtter

2 жыл бұрын

@@DrewSavo Y’know what, I would call that cheating, but that was actually a genius move. I’ll pay £150 for that car just so Jeremy makes a profit lol

@lyonvensa

2 жыл бұрын

Ironically in the next clip he only had a quid left from 5000 pounds for buying a car that costs 4999 pounds lol.

@SplicerOtter

2 жыл бұрын

@@lyonvensa I doubt he spent less than £5000 on that car. Pretty sure he was lying about that one

0:00 S11E1 1:57 S13E2 5:38 S12E1 6:34 S11E3 8:37 S11E5 9:48 S10E7 13:00 S8E8 17:01 GT S2E4 19:18 S6E2 21:38 S22E3 23:32 S5E6 25:27 S4E3 29:33 S15E2 32:03 S22E3 34:03 S5E6 36:20 S6E2 38:01 GT S3E10 44:41 S16E4 47:39 S17E2 50:29 S3E2

@starfire00100

Жыл бұрын

tyvm!

@MohammadAlmhbshi

10 ай бұрын

How did you know all of that?

@ShingenNolaan

10 ай бұрын

You are a star,mate! Now I can watch all of those.

@JRDISTURBED

5 ай бұрын

Man and i thought i was a fan

@StarfywalkingTYPH

5 ай бұрын

Thank you!

29:13 I think that’s the loudest and most excited I’ve ever seen Clarkson!😂

@jacobrumens9601

Жыл бұрын

One pound!!!!

@DrElsemere

Жыл бұрын

About 7 years before brawn gp

@trevorholmes2763

Жыл бұрын

I mean to be fair I would be that happy to to get a car that cheap

36:42 I love the genuine reaction from James

@JetFalcon710

2 жыл бұрын

*"YEEEESS!"*

@Leonf123

5 ай бұрын

Absolute elation for him 😂

"It's minus 35 for buying a car with a manual gearbox! How fair's that? I lose 35 points for my wet crotch!" That's my first ever Top Gear memory.

@KingchooRS

3 ай бұрын

21:07 in case anyone was wondering

29:04 probably the most epic win in TopGear history

@Mr.JohnCruz-st7is

6 ай бұрын

29:10 James & Richard: Oh no. Jeremy: £1! £1! Yes! [Crowd cheering & clapping] JC: The Volvo! Losers! Losers!

9:17 imagine hearing this with no context

5:08 You’ve got to love the look of absolute disappointment on that lady’s face when she finds out James didn’t beat Jeremy lol

@sonofsparda657

4 ай бұрын

i bet those girls felt REAL uncomfortable with big old orangutan man, jeremy clarkson so up close and personal, BEGGING them to find his handbrake turn "cool", lol.

@buttermanex2002

3 ай бұрын

find yourself someone who looks at you the way she looks at james omg

the reaction of jeremy when richard only got 9 points is priceless

"That's interesting, Minus, minus which is a plus which is a minus", gets me every time

43:40 I was happy to help both James and Jeremy out here 😂 I think I actually was one of the first viewers (before 1k) on the unboxing video from James. Happy to be part of something that actually came back in the show!

@nevermind5657

6 ай бұрын

i loved in that same segment this this: All credit to instagram, by that afternoon, they had shut me down.

i love how as time goes on in top gear, their challenge names get even more absurdly long

@hamoostaffat

Жыл бұрын

It's when they had to start tacking bits onto the boards to get the rest of the challenge name on

Simply brilliant. Clarkson, Hammond and May were the best thing that came out of the BBC since Monty Python. It was almost Monty Python with cars.

47:56 I love how Hammond realized how this one was going to go lol

I thought Hammond hated football, but he was spot on on that FA cup final between arsenal and United 😂

@sukhdevr3489

2 жыл бұрын

And it worked perfectly for the situation they were in.

The scoreboard was always one of my favourite segments.

The British Leyland episode has to be one of my favourite episodes! It was RIDICULOUSLY funny with its challenges, and a great purpose to find a good BL car!

@jacobrumens9601

Жыл бұрын

I loved it too! If I was to buy one of those cars, it would be the Austin Princess! 😊

@AdamTheMan1993

Жыл бұрын

Or rather a good purpose not to buy a car made by BL as they were so badly built all the body panels will likely fall off while you are out on the road

@RedJLP

Жыл бұрын

@@AdamTheMan1993 If it was the Rover, certainly, the Dolly would have me worry about everything else, but the Princess was surprisingly well off

24:44 “if I put angry short bloke I’ll get no replies” “how many replies did you get?” “None”

@JetFalcon710

2 жыл бұрын

24:38*

10:28 if you look closely, they edited it so that it would cover his failed writing with when Jeremy wrote his score by using the clip where he was writing in his own score. 10:35 you can see that the clip that the score he wrote isnt there anymore and the one in James's slot is all blurry and then he writes his own score. I have no idea why I noticed it but I noticed it.

@BristolRoversFan

11 ай бұрын

Good spotting

29:14 this would surprise me even more than one of my chaps won a jackpot if I hadn't watched Top Gear.

36:43 the excitement of May is just the best

"I'm a clot, and I ruined my car... And I won!" my favourite bit after "-And Jeremy, you get minus three thousand five hundred. -Why did I get that? -You just did."

17:40 One of the best bits when things are not scripted 🤣 Love it

@n1thmusic229

2 жыл бұрын

It was scripted though

@greatsageclok-roo9013

2 жыл бұрын

@@n1thmusic229 And heavily so. I'd say that The Grand Tour was MORE scripted than Top Gear... to a painful degree!

@tcideh4929

2 жыл бұрын

@@n1thmusic229 him struggling to write on the vertical board was scripted how?

@n1thmusic229

2 жыл бұрын

@@tcideh4929 Maybe not him writing but the numbers and the dialogue and the setting has almost no improv

@yourfavoritepot6285

Жыл бұрын

@@n1thmusic229 I feel the irony in this episode is bc it was named unscripted

“I COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED!” Lol awh Hammond, always make me laugh 😂

@adrielsebastian5216

2 жыл бұрын

@John Dexter Cruz "So? You still lost!"

@emptybucket1988

2 жыл бұрын

But you would still lose

@scsutton1

Жыл бұрын

The irony was, he nearly was in the very next episode.

@skorpion3993

4 ай бұрын

When James says “So? You’d have still lost” I always lose it 🤣

5:50 my favourite, because they don’t even go through the scores, James effectively makes them up on the spot.

36:40 that has to be the most wholesome James May moment in all of Top Gear

@JetFalcon710

2 жыл бұрын

"Eighty...two" *"YEEEEESSS!!!"*

@farhanatashiga3721

2 жыл бұрын

I think this is one of the few unscripted moments considering how genuinely happy uppity he seems

@mudchair16

Жыл бұрын

"Wholesome"... seriously?

31:33 Somebody needs to create a GIF of this.

29:18 Hammond is internally screaming, behind that paper. 35:37 - 36:11 HAHAHAHA. This is brilliant! Definitely one of Jezza's cleverest moments!

That one where Jeremy sold his car in bits was probably one of the few times he called himself a genius legitimately

18:38 Jeremy was so pissed he nuked the entire scoreboard

@noprotein311

Жыл бұрын

Lol good eye

11:27 We all have that one friend like James who's good in calculations and tells us the total sum before we can even calculate it

@justagamer7755

Жыл бұрын

Istg I’ve been obsessed with that. How tf did he get 300 pounds. If it’s 20 pounds for every yard and he does 1500 yards he should have 30k pounds not 300.

@traeyboy529

Жыл бұрын

@@justagamer7755 That's actually incorrect. It wasn't even pounds, it was every 20 *pence* per yard.

@TheLastCrusader22

Ай бұрын

HA, jokes on you, I don't have ANY friends!

@43:45 For someone called captain slow and was mocked for being stuck in the 70's he made a video which was ironically appeals more to younger people than Clarkson's 😂😂

@emptybucket1988

2 жыл бұрын

Never mind the fact that he is very famous on the internet as it appears

I absolutely loved Jeremy's Reaction to Hammond getting a score of 9

James: Hang on, you put that on with gaffer tape. Jeremy: So? The whole British Army is held together with gaffer tape One of the best clarkson quotes in this video 😂

@gedhoughton9523

2 жыл бұрын

Very true as well

@wimspreeuwenberg2516

2 жыл бұрын

🤣😂😂😂😂😂🤣😍😅😅🤣

@Thwack992

Жыл бұрын

It’s sniper tape and it’s very different I promise

24:24 - 24:50 This is just a hilarious moment.

@hunterbeatbilly9836

Жыл бұрын

I see you gonzo

@dylanmcgivern668

Жыл бұрын

whooooaaahhh

@Nathaniel2256Studios

Жыл бұрын

The way he says 'none' so quick

@LoightaFluwid

Жыл бұрын

@@dylanmcgivern668 5 foot 11????

@skorpion3993

4 ай бұрын

Richard “Mild Mannered, Snappy Dresser, 5ft 11” Jeremy “WHAAAAT??!!” 🤣

31:33 Arthur Fleck dancing over Murray's body

i was tryna to find a compilation of their scoreboards fails and finally this came up. thx for this!

Ah yes, the Official Compilation of ‘I got minus exactly-what-i-already-had’

Smooth transition at 12:59

10:30 obsessed with how the editing team put the footage of jeramy writing his own score down as "james's" because you can clearly see how he's completely smudged over james's actual box

24:42 the way Hammond quickly and flatly answered broke me

Love that Hammond went from "90's clubber" to "try to stay young dad" to looking like a Lord of yankee-doodle

It’ll be a sad day for humanity when these three inevitably film their final program together.

The fact that this can be nearly an hour alone is legendary.

They are so young in some of these. It's cool seeing these old ones been watching them since like 2010

I feel actually quite good when I realised that I know exactly the challenges and episodes this is from. Like, not the numbers, but definitely series and what it was about. Ah yes, my life has come full circle.

well, many teenagers now days really want that Volvo for a project car, so i guess 5:25 he's right

@revolver265

2 жыл бұрын

Old ones now officially have drift taxes. They've run out of 240SX's and are now hunting 240's, for some reason. Frequently came with manual as a fuel-sipping, lighter transmission. Safe, indestructible, and engines understressed for reliability so you can press out a lot of power, and your parents will only pick up on the first two qualities.

I love the audience booing at Jeremy at 20:37 when they read out the results of the reliability test!

That whole -3560 bit kills me all the time. Been watching since I was 7. But nothing beats May saying "You just did".

18:18 he refers to chelsea losing against manchester united back in april 2017 even chelsea were unstoppable back then

Thank you so much for uploading this, I always loved the scoreboard segments but I could never find much footage of them online

The scoring system gets more and more accurate through each series.

Jeremy's face at 7:50 was the best and 29:10 is one of the best

29:10 Clarkson after Hamster and Cap. Slow saw £1 on his VAT for the Volvo.... GOLD!!!!

Well done on James for tapping into the new generation's love of Unboxing videos.

The greatest comeback is the £1 car 😂

6:47 Nought, nought, nought 😂👍

"wait a minute... i have lost exactly the amount of points I already had" "YES"

21:59 Jeremy had a point tho

Jeremy: "I was the first to arrive so I get 10 points. Richard, you came second so you get 5 points and James, you punched someone in a wheelchair, stole a freddo from a corner shop, slide tackled Hammond, threw a brick at a police station, RKO'd a deliveroo cyclist, got stung by a wasp, got hit by a train and then died so you get -496 points."

@gladwrapenjoyer1973

Жыл бұрын

Audience: *laughter*

@Jtmissile

5 ай бұрын

James: Hold on. I've got minus the number of points I already had!

This is one of the best compilation ❤️

I love how Clarkson put his singles ad in the men seeking men column...and it worked! 🤣

Richard: YES, I’M FINALLY GOING TO WIN!! James: According to the producers.

Can you do one on Peugeot stereotypes? Thx Anyway have a nice day cya 🙂

Imagine walking into a dealership and getting a car for 1 pound, mot everything up to date 😳

@AdamTheMan1993

Жыл бұрын

Especially since it's a 1980s Volvo that is built to last forever as they were built like tanks

23:12 James May's "hearse-bulance" with "ECNALUBMA" (ambulance) on the hood 😂 I saw that episode, and it was hilarious.

It reminds me of when playing football as a kid, you’d be thrashing the other team 15-0 but someone shouts NEXT GOAL WINS! haha

Thanks for the video mate! It takes a lot of effort and I just wanted to let you know that We appreciate that 👍👍

the british leyland scoreboard scene felt nice n wholesome for some reason lol

The compilation we have been waiting for. Thanks for uploading this

14:20 - Even though Jeremy did tape the door, it was probably fair he got *atleast ONE point* out of it since he did actually get the door on.

Hammond's voice change when he says what the best car is at 5:30

17:02 The whole time I was thinking "Just chuck it in the water!" So I was pleased when they actually did in the end. :)

13:21 feel bad for James 😂😂

You should do a compilation of every time they do a ‘cue the music’ and all we get is a vaguely A team soundalike because the BBC only paid for the rights to it for the first broadcast and not the repeats.

May: "And Jeremy, you got..." Hammond: "A gear lever in his bottom."

Richard losing 1000 points every time is the funniest

@interstate366

2 жыл бұрын

Why’s it minus 1000 for poo?!

@angryoliver0647

2 жыл бұрын

@@interstate366 because poo is very disgusting

@DirtyDoctorDan

2 жыл бұрын

@@angryoliver0647 disagree

@angryoliver0647

2 жыл бұрын

@@DirtyDoctorDan is that a joke? If not, how?

@DirtyDoctorDan

2 жыл бұрын

@@angryoliver0647 tasty yummy good poopoo

31:33 The legend that he is James "Captain Slow" May legendary Victory Dance

45:48 "minus 1000" is one of my favourite moments from TG.

12:20 - First time that Jeremy actually admitted that James actually won something. I was waiting for him to say: "You two know that the ROVER SD1 was the better car..." He determined James was the winner

9:07 Max Mosley was the only one that wasn't on the list of Merc's former owners

@bmstylee

2 жыл бұрын

No. It's worse.

@angryoliver0647

2 жыл бұрын

Who's max mosley?

@user-cx3ev5xn9n

2 жыл бұрын

@@angryoliver0647 former FIA president. Sex scandal hero. Son of Oswald Mosley.

@angryoliver0647

2 жыл бұрын

@@user-cx3ev5xn9n right

@sportsjefe

Жыл бұрын

@@angryoliver0647 Max Mosley used to run the FIA (F1's governing body). His family were literal Nazi collaborators. Mosley was the youngest son of Sir Oswald Mosley, former leader of the British Union of Fascists, and Diana Mitford.

This is the greatest compilation, in the world

40:50 me, a former James May impersonator: (nervous sweating)

@JetFalcon710

2 жыл бұрын

A former _w h a t ?_

To this day i can't understand how Hammond's broken, shoddily upholstered Spider managed to score a whole 14 points less than Jeremy's also broken, crash damaged, hideously oversprayed 75.

@farhanatashiga3721

2 жыл бұрын

One can run on its own power, the other has to be towed, simple as that.

@j4ff4c3ks1

2 жыл бұрын

@@farhanatashiga3721 one was simply not working, the other was straight up wrecked, to a point where even if the hideous paint job wasnt there itd still need basically an entire new body

@TheLastCrusader22

Ай бұрын

@@j4ff4c3ks1A car that is functioning is able to do the fundamental task of a car. Of course it should score higher than something that can't no matter how ruined the body of the former is! Also, concourse judges are individuals, believe it or not, with subjective tastes. And it was probably all made up for TV anyway