I sit through a ton of these with my wife because she loves them and I love her. Then I make her sit through Godzilla movies and it evens out the score.

@tracygilbert5731

2 жыл бұрын

Make her sit through Matrix Resurrections, that'll learn her.

@scottdoesntmatter4409

2 жыл бұрын

@@tracygilbert5731 no, that's downright evil, that movie sucks

@NordicDan

2 жыл бұрын

Atta boy

@dannuttle9005

2 жыл бұрын

"Look, Godzilla! It's snowing fire!"

@mashah1085

2 жыл бұрын

Try "Gamera vs Guiron"....the MST3K verison

The only thing missing was “the misunderstanding.”

@deepsleep7822

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah, usually occurs within the last 20 to 30 minutes of the show.

@elterrifico9522

2 жыл бұрын

And what about the touch and go scene at the train station?

@nancyryan7971

Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣

Missing is the gingerbread baking contest at the winter festival where everyone drinks hot cocoa.

@austinfrazier7325

2 жыл бұрын

Yep and of course she wins.

Here's the real paradox: the only way she can afford coffee from the small-town gourmet coffee shop is if she keeps her big-city job.

@TrueVintageRnBFan

Жыл бұрын

Now that’s a plot!!!!

@indigowolf556

Жыл бұрын

Lol 😂😂😂

Don’t forget to give the child the wisdom, insight, and judgment of the Dalai Lama!

The walking through town holding a coffee cup is perfect. Its in every movie.

@oscrthgrch7

2 жыл бұрын

You can always tell that the cup is empty by the way the actors wave it around when they gesture.

@jamesstuartbrice420

2 жыл бұрын

That bit was also used in Notting Hill, where Hugh Grant bumps into Julia Roberts and splashes orange juice over her cloths, which is the meet cute that gets the ball rolling after their meeting at his book store. Many films start with an accident that should make people not like each other, but they go on to become a couple.

Jake thought he could never love again, but Holly changed all that! And Holly was too wrapped up in her career to see the real treasure of life, until she found out what love really means. Thank you Mallhark for another surprise ending!

@jamesstuartbrice420

2 жыл бұрын

That is the standard plot, but hey, don't we want that? It is so bad its good.

This really touched my soul. I cried when the snow fell.

@tonkaGuy888

2 жыл бұрын

Me too. But I cry at Sleep Number Beds commercials.

@luke_skywanker7643

2 жыл бұрын

@@tonkaGuy888 My neighbor gets 'excited' watching the sheep. Nobody sleeps around here anymore.😜

@flemingcourt

2 жыл бұрын

Perfect comment Gary!

@davidrynberk4830

2 жыл бұрын

Like when you realise you just took a dump and there is no more tissue on the roll

@healingypsy

2 жыл бұрын

You're kidding right

This was a parody? Seemed real enough to me.

@brianbalster3521

2 жыл бұрын

i'd watch it!

My wife watched one of these movies last night and this was literally the plot ! Hah !

They left out the most important part -- when he reveals that he is also King of Slobovia! And has a uniform with a sash and lots of medals!

@jobob47

8 ай бұрын

or a prince. its always a prince. and then I think, you know, megan markle watched more hallmark than she should have.

What has five locales, 15 actors and one storyline? 600+ Hallmark movies

A year later, and this is still a holiday classic.

How can a true parody not show the gazebo?

@Genegenedtb

2 жыл бұрын

or ice skating

@deepsleep7822

2 жыл бұрын

Or hot cocoa

Volunteers and a puppy?! He just isn't playing fair. No Hallmark female character can resist that combination. I am doing the caregiver gig for my Mom right now and it's Hallmark channel 24/7, that logo is burned into her display. It's got me so buggy, I'm about to go out and commit a love crime...

@jobob47

8 ай бұрын

hahahahahahahah ah, yeah.

You forgot the gazebo, tree lighting and hot chocolate! 🤣

@jobob47

8 ай бұрын

always with the damn hot chocolate.

@marybroderick8265

5 ай бұрын

Also, the chocolate chip pancakes and great great grandma's ornament

Still remember the SNL parody, of these movies, where the female lead says "I live in stock footage on New York City that still has views of the Twin Towers in it."

Better ending. Holly pays off the town council to have the inn condemned. Then she takes it over for back taxes. Jake is fired and ends up moving to Deadwood where he contemplates his future with Jack Daniels. Now THAT would be a hubilee!

@squirehaggard4749

2 жыл бұрын

That would be if Amazon started making holiday movies. And instead of a daughter Jake would have Alexa to dispense profound, perspective-setting life advice.

@jamesstuartbrice420

2 жыл бұрын

That is a case for Touched by an Angel. And the angels would help work it all out in the end. And if anyone is killed or dies, Andrew shows up to tell them it is ok, Heaven is much nicer, and he or she gets to go there sooner than his or her bereaved relatives. And Monica looks on with a halo over her beautiful hair. And very likely they find a solution and reconcile with life and find love again.

@bobstadelmayer8402

2 жыл бұрын

I might actually want to watch a Hallmark movie with my wife, if it had your ending.

WINNER! Cutest cast in a Hallmark Christmas Parody, Cutest Half orphaned child 6 and under, Cutest puppy 1 year and under, Special award - Cutest deformed fake nose.

The MOST predictable thing about these movies? No mention of Jesus, at all.

@jamesstuartbrice420

2 жыл бұрын

Sometimes they sing Christmas songs about the manger and the inn keeper, which hints at Jesus. Or they go to church, which is also an allusion to Christianity.

Oh my goodness- yes! 👏🏻 That’s how these stories always seem to go!

@briangriffiths3852

2 жыл бұрын

Hi Susan, Pardon me if you deem my comments to be somewhat acerbic? I do indeed agree with you fully! The problem with all these "Hallmark" produced Christmas Romance movies, is the very fact of their excruciating predictability from beginning to end. they are produced with such UNREALITY! and makes me wonder how "Hallmark" get away with all the fake and falseness of Christmas! Firstly! Why? are they always filmed in well to do homes? with well to do people/families? Homes well over decorated for Christmas with more than one tree is just laughable! Often! Man meets Girl with a geeky kid in tow or vice versa! Always a finale embrace/kiss! enough to make one want to throw up!! Then we see Fake snow! Fake Santa Claus in ill quality, ill fitting outfits and fake beards. ( what must the kids be thinking? ) All the acting is two bit with two bit actors! ( a lousy job, but someone has to do it??? ) The females who tilt their necks left or right with such cheesy looking expressions on their faces and sighing eyes, is where I gain so many belly laughs!! Especially when the overbearing display of such glisteningly white teeth when smiling on cue to show them off! I am still waiting for someone to explain to me why? in particular do the females all speak with such nasally up and down crackly tones in their voices as if they have a sore throat or have swallowed a frog? Rivet! Rivet! I can't help wonder the scripts are so corny, so cheesy, so phoney, taking Christmas up far too high a level than what it is actually all about? The very idea of all and sundry giving you the impression that they all live happily ever after is really quite absurd. It's more than high time that "Hallmark" produced a Christmas movie where the script is about poorer homesteads! poorer families struggling to afford to meet with a decent Christmas! Another great belly laugh is where I see in any of these ridiculous movies is someone gets to sing a song, play a piano/play a guitar, when finished they get a standing ovation! vibrant hand clapping session and vocally whooping for such a mediocre performance!! My best belly laugh is where in the finale embrace and kiss, lots of people standing around looking on as if they have never seen such a thing! and finally it gets to SNOW! on cue. Christmas wishes, Ebenezer Scrooge!

@lisadiconti

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah...I like the sleek uninterested fiancee.

@chesterwilberforce9832

2 жыл бұрын

There's a podcast (can't recall the name) that talks about the wars between the Christmas channels. Perhaps not a surprise that it's a ruthless grab for ad dollars. Putting the Benjamins back in Christmas.

This story is just too beautiful to limit to December. If only there was a way to show it again in July.

@warthogA10

2 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣

LOL Too true... very good parody. In the Hallmark universe, people from big cities are successful(?) event planners sent to quaint small yet oddly thriving towns LMAO! The city girl meets the ranch -for- sad-horses owner and fall in love. 🎄

@gtrent7744

2 жыл бұрын

NYC apartments are huge in hallmark movies. I want one of those. Well you got to appreciative it for what it is, fantasy.

Jake needs to be cuter...and by nationality, he needs to be a Canadian (to keep filming costs down)...though acting the part of an American. And the whole thing needs to be filmed in a suburb of Ottawa...again, to keep filming costs down.

@theoriginalchefboyoboy6025

2 жыл бұрын

Most MallHark movies are 10-ply. You could add about another 20% on there, bud, and let that marinate for a while...

@MrMarkus49

2 жыл бұрын

@@theoriginalchefboyoboy6025 Hallmark needs to spice them up a bit.Like near the end the beautiful woman opens up her sweater and says..How do you like these ornaments? :)

@markeaton6435

2 жыл бұрын

NO! They need to repeat what they did here in N Georgia: film in mid-August, when even the gnats sweat. "Christmas in Homestead" was made in nearby Dahlonega, and I happened to ride through the town square after filming was done one day. I related the sight of the snow facade to my wife and spoiled all future Hallmark movies for her. When she watched the final product, she could see the actors sweating in their "holiday" clothes.

@GiftSparks

2 жыл бұрын

They have a dialect coach whose sole job is to keep people from saying “Sorry.”

@pamalojo

2 жыл бұрын

@@markeaton6435 Too funny and totally relatable. Here in BC I witnessed a snowman building contest in the height of summer with fake snow blankets all over our local park. I felt sorry for all the actors decked out in winter gear.

Thank you for this parody. It is so needed. These "Christmas all day every day" channels are just perpetuating unrealistic fantasies that make everybody feel like lonely loser failures because they're not spending a cheery holiday in some snowy Vermont inn. I listened to my neighbor mow his lawn on Christmas eve and spent most of Christmas day watching basketball games and depression eating. I have honestly never kissed anyone under the mistletoe and I've been married twice. You ever want to see a bunch of sad ass people, go to an airport on Cmas day and watch all the depressed divorced parents sticking their kids on airplanes. And yet we expect every Christmas to be like it was when you were 10 and got a bike. hohoho.

@brianog5267

2 жыл бұрын

Dude you need an ear to Talk to?? I’m here for yah buddy…

@d.vaughn8990

2 жыл бұрын

Hang in there buddy! If we lived close by, I'd bring over a couple of beers... Take care!

This CANNOT be a Hallmark movie, eh. It is actually well written, snappy bits of dialogue. Honest to goodness chuckles. And ...NO Candace Cameron Bure anywhere.

@melissacooper8724

Жыл бұрын

Well you won't see Candace Cameron Bure on Hallmark movies anymore because I've heard she switched to another company that is more Christian.

The tears I've shed having watched this, have Moistened my Christmas Sweater with a Reindeer 🦌 with Antlers that Light up and little Bells on them..thank you...THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH 🤗...👀

This. Is. Brilliant.

So true, predictable, and ... I cried.

And yet, I will watch it again and again, every year! LOL

Where the beautiful people fall in love and live happily ever after. I want a walk on role as the ugly electrician who tells them their well pump is burned out and it will cost $5000 to replace on Christmas eve. Never enough realism in these.

@evegreenification

2 жыл бұрын

That is the only reason I would watch

Don’t forget the running through town scene when the actress has clearly never run a day in her life 😂

@jamesstuartbrice420

2 жыл бұрын

She works out at a fitness studio, a nice one where you never meet characters from Sex and the City.

Another thing about these Christmas movies is the constant ad placement!! They always highlight that they are driving the new Cadillac or drinking the Coca Cola, and the jewelry ALWAYS is in a Kay Jeweler box!! I pointed this out to my lovely lady and she started actually counting all the "ad placements" in these movies and makes fun of them now!! AT&T phones and Starbucks coffee is easy to spot in the background scenes as well at times, and the movie is a two hour long infomercial ad for all the products used to make this movie!! LOL

Thank God its not real, my wife would make me watch it with her

Pretty much the story line of EVERY movie, tv show and book in existence and yet to come.

Live for the cheesiness every year

@borisc6714

2 жыл бұрын

Cheesy, reliable, reliable and predictable!!!

These movies have like 2 scripts they all share. They just change up the actors and the scenery and keep churning them out every year. I know because my wife watches these every Christmas season 😄 I used to tease her about it , but she likes them so I don't Sat much anymore.

It’s still better than all the nasty and depressing crap on tv

@parinitmarquard6367

2 жыл бұрын

Yes in Germany everyday crime Stories....Hallmark ist easy digestable

I see no way to make this any more perfect. Just wonderful ... every step of the way.

The Hallmark Channel movies - and their hypnotic effect on my wife is why I can never again take her seriously on an intellectual level. (That's really meant more tongue in cheek than it sounds ... but it's also still kind of true)

Every time I need a smooth bowel movement, I watch a lovely Hallmark movie. But I can't watch too many cause I'll have diarrhea!

Yep. That pretty much describes all of them movies. But I’m still a sucker for them. LOL!

New woman in town meets angelic man with an evil girlfriend. They meet by accident and fall in love is basically every Hallmark Christmas movie

I loved the production values. I never saw that perfect ending coming. Hollywood are you seeing this?

Making fun of my Hallmark Christmas movies?! HOW DARE YOU!!! 🤪

Predictably, I experienced the same reaction as with previous Mallhark movies- queasiness & nausea! I was only saved by switching to the battle scene in BRAVEHEART- thank God for testosterone!

nailed it.

Would you believe there’s a man out there that thinks marriage should be exactly like a Hallmark movie. I am not lying.

Funny how all the Hallmark stories are about a woman basically cheating on her boyfriend and it's all wonderful and magical... And, everyone is rich and live in perfect, beautiful homes in perfect, beautiful towns🙄

@wmden1

2 жыл бұрын

Yes, and her boy friend is either a workaholic, money grubbing a-- hole, or just a regular a--hole and she is kind of ignorant of the fact, until she meets Mr. Right and his "adorable", and somewhat precocious, daughter.

@warthogA10

2 жыл бұрын

@@wmden1 which still wouldn't make it right to cheat on him. Just sayin

@epitreture

2 жыл бұрын

Yup, Hallmark movies are totally unrealistic crap that women can't get enough of.

@chesterwilberforce9832

2 жыл бұрын

And they always get the two black people that live in Vermont to wander around the quaint town square just so they won't get bashed for racism.

@epitreture

2 жыл бұрын

@@chesterwilberforce9832 You're right, I forgot to mention that !!

Only thing missing is Jake need to don a Scotch-plaid flannel shirt at some point. I was going to say the high-powered upper-class fiancé too, but you trotted him out just in time.

Every guy wears a scarf in these movies

Oh, don't forget there is always a royal wedding on Christmas!

@mashah1085

2 жыл бұрын

In some totally English-speaking country "somewhere" in the middle of Europe that was never impacted by the war or the anti-monarchist movements of the 19th Century.

Nicely done. The best part is that next year the same cadre of actors and actresses will be hooking up with new partners to live happily ever after with.

Checked all the boxes except for the playful food fight and the misunderstanding (between the two meant for each other) toward the end -- a misunderstanding that is resolved at the end.

this is exactly how they go or one better city girl goes home for xmas and falls in love with the hunky widower of the town or women's current boyfriend doesn't treat her nice ignores her and promises to go home with her for xmas but backs out for kissing the cooperate ass to get ahead and she finds true love in a small town you should do ones like that they'd be funny

@timkellyD2R

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks. You just saved two hours of my life!

It's like getting a Karo syrup enema.

I walk into the room and my wife is watching one, I say…boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back…and walk out of the room.

Love it!

Just lately I saw a couple of Hallmark movies where the plot of Groundhog Day is recycled. A character does not represent the spirit of Christmas and small town loyalty and love, and so has to repeat Christmas eve over and over until they get it right. One is A Christmas Wedding Date, the other is the 12 Days of Christmas Eve. I am sure there are dozens more, I just have not seen most of them yet. Oh, and then the prince from a little country in Europe visits America and conceals his identity so that people will treat him like an ordinary guy. Of course he falls in love with the small town, girl next door waitress or businesswoman who got fired and needs to come home for Christmas. And she falls in love with him for who he is, not for a rich prince from Utopialand Europe. In the one I saw last night the royals seemed to live in Schloss Neuschwanstein. But anyone who ever visited Bavaria knows that is the castle of King Ludwig, and not the royal palace of some small country no one ever heard of. Are we viewers that ignorant?

Nailed it!

Sorry. But I liked it. It was something I wish we could still see in real life. Happy New Year, (2022) everyone.

Just once I want to see a Hallmark movie where it’s all about the guy. He has a fat, mean GF and dumps her for a young, hot GF in the end. Perfect story.

You have just added hours and hours to my life *:)* ....

Was hoping for diversion from the parody script to where Holly instead buys (and closes) the small hotel, fires all employees before Christmas, and secures nearby site for a new Marriott.

Pronouncing jubilee and "hubilee". I don't know why but that's hilarious.

Brilliant! Jake is a Veteran too, right?

Who else thinks Wal*Mart needs a 24 hour Christmas movie channel?

I like that Hallmark is out to spread hope and love and warmth and kindness. I don't like how they imply it's always going to be with perfect people in perfect places with perfect timing in similar circumstances. You can have a love story in a bad part of town, with less perfect people, making it work despite bad weather and lots of life pain. That's what we need, the way people actually fall in love. Someone write that, based on real experience.

You forgot to mention he was also a Prince about to inherit the throne.

You have it down pat- including the eleven year old matchmaker!

Thank you for this.

Thanks for the laugh!😊

….Add some hot chocolate, the obligatory tree lighting , and her bff giving love advice, and then you got it.

In my story, if I wrote this, the snow would be nuclear fallout.

Predictably, I fake cried at the end.

You forgot that at the end it turns out that he is the Grand Duke of SomeVaguelyEuropeanCountry, so now she is his Grand Duchess.

A buddy of mine works in film production. He knows first hand there are 35 new Hallmark Christmas channel movies queued up for production. Gulp.

The guy would be taller, better looking, more muscular, and *definitely* have blue eyes. And he would be rude to her upon first meeting. And she would be engaged to some nerdy workaholic guy with frequent nasal infections in the city. But he's "just not right" for her, so she would break it off 45 minutes in. Then her car would get stuck in the snow and the handsome guy would stop and rescue her. Maybe he would be riding his gorgeous horse in a field next to the road. And his daughter would play some cute covert role in getting them together.

Every Hallmark movie EVER

the hallmark movies brought me back to the land of the living. i was down and out. any boy meets girl, girl loses boy, boy and girl get back together was like fire to my brain. but these poorly written, badly acted movies. did not offend. who could care if they saved her great aunts bakery? who could invest even a drop of sympathy for these people. but i could stand to watch it. and little by little i began to criticize and then to despise. and i was back. so, thanks, hallmark.

@marygibbons2263

2 жыл бұрын

🤣😂🤣😂🤣

@jamesstuartbrice420

2 жыл бұрын

That is a bit hard. I would like to meet one of these nice career women with a heart of gold and fall in love. Of course, I know it does not happen in reality. But it is a nice escape from reality, while it lasts.

We shoot a ton of these in a place called Maple Ridge in British Columbia. The quaint gazebo in the centre of town was featured in so many that the word came down from Hallmark that if they saw the gazebo again everyone was fired. Fun game: if you see the gazebo, take a drink.

Hallmark in a nut shell LOL!

just saved me two hours

Nope. They don't kiss until the last 3 minutes of the show, according to my wife.

That was great👍🏻. I believe you’ve got a winner here. I stopped watching hallmark a couple of years ago. The scrips were reruns with the occasional face change other than that nothing different.

I saw what the daughter did with the puppy and that peanut butter.

Yeah that dude is in the closet but can't come out in such a small town. You don't wear a sweater like that without closing your car's door with your hips when nobody is looking.

Clusterfunke Christmas if you want to see a full length version of this concept.

This is 100% accurate!!!

LOL! It was great :D

Perfect 👍

The nose knows true love.

So true. Seen one you've seen them all. Just like dime store novels

Ooh I want to watch that movie!!

Good Lord! Am I ugly!

Perfect

I hee-hawed all the way through this!

😄Love it.

I was born yesterday, so thanks for the heads up

Perfect!