5 Secrets About Yourself You Should NEVER Tell a Man (He Doesn't Need to Know!)

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Пікірлер: 619

  • @JonathonAslay
    @JonathonAslay Жыл бұрын

    FREE Call with Jonathon► jonathonaslay.com/coaching

  • @NotPCandnotadelusionalenabler

    @NotPCandnotadelusionalenabler

    Жыл бұрын

    How much do you charge for coaching?

  • @vitareid

    @vitareid

    8 ай бұрын

    Nurse with a purse! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @loganross4774
    @loganross4774 Жыл бұрын

    1. Sexual details about your past partner. 2. Things you hate about yourself. 3. Insecurities about the relationship. Sabotaging conversations. 4. Judgement thoughts. 5. Shame stories. Be kind. Delicate. Timing, building trust. Can my partner receive this w/o sabotaging the relationship. Everyone wants to be loveable and likeable.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Exactly

  • @loganross4774

    @loganross4774

    Жыл бұрын

    @@JonathonAslay 🌷✨😊

  • @barbaragrace3027

    @barbaragrace3027

    Жыл бұрын

    No

  • @TheFocusOfLovecom

    @TheFocusOfLovecom

    Жыл бұрын

    thanks so much for the notes 🎉

  • @pammoore587

    @pammoore587

    10 ай бұрын

    Thank you for your information. It helps alot.

  • @dianedorney5147
    @dianedorney5147 Жыл бұрын

    Be careful ladies...men at this age are looking for a nurse with a purse...caregiver that's fine if you've been married for fifty years not with someone you've known for a year...my opinion

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Only some men do...

  • @liesascott5414

    @liesascott5414

    Жыл бұрын

    I used to own a German restaurant and have a medical background and lived in a 5000 sf home I had just built. I was 60 at the time and got 4 marriage proposals in one year and only dated one of them briefly.😂

  • @liesascott5414

    @liesascott5414

    Жыл бұрын

    @@JonathonAslay Most of which I have encountered in my later life did. Even those who were very well off. Nobody at that age wants to load down more problems and wants to make sure that issues are manageable in the long run. So it is understandable but still not desirable for the most part.

  • @Carolina480

    @Carolina480

    Жыл бұрын

    Yes Diane they are looking what they can get from yu they are not to really take care of yu in all aspects I’m want someone to take care of me and help me of course I will too but don’t want to be used it’s mutual these men pretend someone yu want they can be fake liars manipulating users be aware ladies it’s not easy nowadays lord of users convinient for them only

  • @annarose4828

    @annarose4828

    Жыл бұрын

    You are so right! I have men vet me little comments like do you rent or own? What car do you drine what year? You can feel the user mentality energy. I can't get away from them quick enough. I'd rather be alone then wish l was. I have my grown daughter and furkids and my friends. I'm good unless a easy going kind non player man comes along.

  • @liesascott5414
    @liesascott5414 Жыл бұрын

    Rule # one today. Don't date using texting! Insist on everything being done face to face or at least over the phone. You need to hear at least the voice. Insist on using the phone only with video and texting only to say you are safe (traveling). You need to touch, smell and see a person to really get to know them.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Exactly

  • @dpharrison7

    @dpharrison7

    Жыл бұрын

    So agree

  • @andziagreen4922

    @andziagreen4922

    Жыл бұрын

    Amen👏

  • @teresapetersen1690

    @teresapetersen1690

    Жыл бұрын

    I had a relationship where all we did was to text . There was no communication when we were in person . He spoke , but about himself & never deep conversations .

  • @liesascott5414

    @liesascott5414

    Жыл бұрын

    @@teresapetersen1690 You did NOT have a relationship. You socialized a bit.

  • @RandaWise
    @RandaWise Жыл бұрын

    As a woman, I don't share ANYTHING about myself with men. I believe in letting the relationship flow and grow on a natural basis. I also do not believe in going to bed with anyone. I've had so many women grow frustrated because they went there too quickly, only to realize things about the guy they would've known had they waited. Trust is something that needs to be tested with time. That's the reason I allow a good friendship without expecting anything because I'm not giving up anything valuable such as information and my body. To me, it's pretty simple. I don't need to be in a relationship to feel complete

  • @recuerdos2457

    @recuerdos2457

    Жыл бұрын

    When a guy says the v word in front me and tells me he has 20K hours of experience, very obvious he is full of himself and doesn’t know a thing but bs 🤦‍♀️

  • @3313xx

    @3313xx

    Жыл бұрын

    how would you even be friends though without sharing anything about yourself? seems a bit extreme... like what do you talk about?

  • @RandaWise

    @RandaWise

    Жыл бұрын

    @@3313xx Firstly, there are plenty of things to talk about other than stuff that he doesn't deserve to know right away. Trust takes time. Sometimes a lot of time. People in general usually get to know me on a more natural basis. I'm just not a talker in that regard. The person who posted this video is simply saying don't give up too much too quickly - and I agree with that. If a man has patience, he'll understand that. He'll allow things to grow on their own. If someone insists that I'm not allowing him to get to know me, that means he doesn't have the patience I would require. Stand on your beliefs or fall for anything is my motto

  • @utubefreshie

    @utubefreshie

    Жыл бұрын

    Right on! Im the same way. You have all the marks of high self-esteem. You know your value and self-worth. Don't settle for less!

  • @RandaWise

    @RandaWise

    Жыл бұрын

    @@utubefreshie thanks!!!

  • @carriefawcett9990
    @carriefawcett9990 Жыл бұрын

    I've shared all of these things with my partner and he still loves me. He has also shared his deep, dark thoughts with me. He knows about my sexual history and I know his. He knows how I hate my tummy and wish I was thinner and he reassures me that he loves my body. He knows im insecure and worry about him meeting someone else..he reassures me, that no one else could ever have the chemistry we have. Basically, if a man is INTO YOU you dont have to censor yourself or what you say. Maybe not censoring yourself and being open is a good way of weeding out the shit ones. I "overshared" with a guy before him, and he dumped me. Iam so glad I did, because if I had've kept these things inside, he might have stayed and I would not have met my current man, who is much more suitable in every way. We share things, including the bad stuff, if I have a problem he is my rock and I'm his.

  • @AIshanChatterjee

    @AIshanChatterjee

    Жыл бұрын

    U r extremely fortunate to have a true love to treasure forever.May God bless you both ❤

  • @Dream7773

    @Dream7773

    Жыл бұрын

    Lucky punk 😇

  • @flippdit7385

    @flippdit7385

    Жыл бұрын

    This is a beautiful alternative perspective to this video thank you for sharing

  • @MegaMisfit138

    @MegaMisfit138

    9 ай бұрын

    Nope...being open is an in for a narcissist, cause they replicate you. Telling a man about your sexual past can be a huge turnoff. Plus it's nobody's business. Some things should be kept private. Women nowadays think they owe men all their private secrets. A lady is not supposed to discuss such things. No offense, but this man is giving you good advice, from a non biased standpoint. This is valuable. It's good that your man is supportive, but for most men, this stuff can be a turnoff.

  • @carlandjennifersilva

    @carlandjennifersilva

    9 ай бұрын

    Yes

  • @TheRougefish
    @TheRougefish Жыл бұрын

    Please, stop saying women don't care about looks! Nonsense. I need to be attracted to a man in order to want anything to do with him. The emotional connection is just salt to the soup.

  • @calrey

    @calrey

    Жыл бұрын

    Yeah-I agree with you. Unfortunately, most men, including Jonathon, tend to assume that women are incapable of experiencing attraction and having sexual appetites. Men don't realize that if women aren't attracted to them it's literally because they're not attracted to the guy. And if the woman isn't interested in sex-it means she doesn't want to fake the big 'o'. The man isn't being attentive to her needs. That's the biggest reason why talking about previous sexual experiences can have a long term benefit to a happy and stable relationship. But men shoot themselves in the foot because of their ridiculous egos and need to believe that their new girlfriend is 'pure.' Men refuse to learn how to be equal in the bedroom or everywhere else in the relationship. And then the relationship ends within 2-3 years, if not sooner, or they just settle on being in an unhappy marriage if they get married in their late 40s or 50s.

  • @rockergirl6926

    @rockergirl6926

    8 ай бұрын

    Amen

  • @elizabethdevries8028

    @elizabethdevries8028

    3 ай бұрын

    Absolutely! Great comment’

  • @alissagonzales735
    @alissagonzales735 Жыл бұрын

    My friend lost her husband. She has had men asking her out and about the third date they ask her if the home is hers and paid off. If she has money saved and if her husband had a large insurance when he past away. She tells them I married him and insured him so in case he slipped on a banana peel. Because I was famous for dropping pens, banana peels, marble on the floor and not picking them up. Next time they call. She tells them she has found a younger man.

  • @christinascibetta1043

    @christinascibetta1043

    Жыл бұрын

    I found that a lot of guys are seeking money......i am now very happily married to my second husband .....he wanted responsible but did not expect millionaire

  • @sandyschneider6792

    @sandyschneider6792

    Жыл бұрын

    Ha! Ha! Great comebacks!!

  • @aprildice5486

    @aprildice5486

    Жыл бұрын

    That is hilarious and wonderful!

  • @camellia8625

    @camellia8625

    Жыл бұрын

    A sad state of affairs

  • @PortOrangeMom

    @PortOrangeMom

    11 ай бұрын

    I dated a guy who was very interested in the fact that I had a “real job” with a “401k.” He was unusually interested in my finances. Next!

  • @julietellsthetruth4811
    @julietellsthetruth4811 Жыл бұрын

    What nobody ever talks about is that you can meet the greatest man of the world, and then something can happen and he can become the worst. My ex had a stroke which changed his personality, and he became abusive. Before that, he was amazing. No amount of therapy in the world is going to get me over thinking every relationship I have could also become Jekyll and Hyde. Yes I'll die alone, but I won't die by someone else's hand.

  • @totallynieve7108

    @totallynieve7108

    Жыл бұрын

    Hugs

  • @Infrared1967

    @Infrared1967

    Жыл бұрын

    This happened to my husband. It was a nightmare.

  • @Harmony.faith1177

    @Harmony.faith1177

    11 ай бұрын

    Sorry to hear that but don’t give up on love! With each relationship we learn a lot about ourselves and as long as we are alive we are learning.

  • @sherriflemming3218

    @sherriflemming3218

    11 ай бұрын

    Hugs. This can happen.

  • @kxp66

    @kxp66

    10 ай бұрын

    I knew someone in this situation years ago. They were young with a young family and he was going to lose his livelihood due to blindness. He had glaucoma and was a pilot and became extremely bitter. They divorced and she got much support. ( This happened in the 60’s) . She was my kindergarten teacher and received much moral support from our community at the time. He just bitched constantly and NOTHING could make him happy. I think she just had to get the kids away from him and she wasn’t able to sue for child support and he became estranged from his children. She remarried to a widower with 4 children around the same ages as her children as 2 of his were twins. They became the popular Brady bunch family in our community after that. All the children were well liked but her oldest daughter did suffer from an eating disorder later. Feel she probably suffered childhood trauma with her father’s giving up attitude which led to feelings of rejection I’m sure. My mother is an RN and one of her common sayings is” Sometimes life is just hard. “ All we can really do is make the best out of the cards we’re dealt as not everything can be controlled and happy. Believe she was about 5 or six and her sister was one year younger than her when the parents divorced. The stepdad didn’t come along til she was 15 so she went a decade without much of a father figure in her household but don’t know if she had any caring uncles or even a stay in touch grandfather to model as a caring male in her life but if she did I know it wasn’t something most people would have known about

  • @char72
    @char728 ай бұрын

    Answer: NEVER tell a man about previous sex experiences unless you want to hear about it every time you disagree about something.

  • @tlihdsnm26947
    @tlihdsnm269479 ай бұрын

    You just validated my joke that meeting anyone at this age is about evaluating compatible baggage. It's either divorced, mental or still clueless. Different ball game than younger for sure.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    9 ай бұрын

    Exactly!

  • @ND-or5so
    @ND-or5so9 ай бұрын

    I'm still married to a passive-ggressive covert narcissist and recently separated. We've been married for 8 years. And put it this way, I'm trying to heal from psychologically, emotionally, verbal and financial abuse.

  • @dianegoldberg6791

    @dianegoldberg6791

    9 ай бұрын

    Get out as soon as possible. Good therapist.

  • @mimihag

    @mimihag

    8 ай бұрын

    I suggest checking out books about the damaging effects of cults in addition to any self help or psychology books you read.

  • @alikazan24
    @alikazan24 Жыл бұрын

    First and foremost l, one has to work on discernment. We need to know what we are dealing with before opening up our lives to someone. This is imperative for the protection of our self esteem and integrity. There is NOTHING worse than giving up your pearls to swine!

  • @sjordan7085

    @sjordan7085

    9 ай бұрын

    Being too open to others can lead to being stabbed in the back when the relationship ends. And, that goes for friendships as well as relationships. There is much to be said for taking little baby steps, and maintaining one's independence. We never truly know another, and some folk don't even know themselves. Trust needs to be earned. One can be honest without revealing all. And, somethings should be ' taken with a grain of salt.' Meeting potential partners in situations where there is time to observe eachother on a regular basis before entering into an intimate relationship allows both parties to see eachother as they really are and to discover if their values are compatible. Being single has its benefits.

  • @TheAttractionTriggers
    @TheAttractionTriggers9 ай бұрын

    *Understanding what to keep private is essential for a successful relationship. Let's embrace this advice and protect our personal boundaries.*

  • @3Rebecca3
    @3Rebecca3 Жыл бұрын

    Thank you …I’m dating a shorter guy that adores me & checks all the boxes except for height. Gonna start thinking of him as a navy seal 🔥

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Yay!

  • @wejoin

    @wejoin

    Жыл бұрын

    😂😂

  • @liesascott5414
    @liesascott5414 Жыл бұрын

    There is a difference between insecurity and secrets. If you are 40 and older you have done things that you are NOT proud of. That is life. You learned from it and moved on. Sexual experiences are different with every partner. Let it go. Insecurities are human and should be shared but at the right moment and only to what applies.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Indeed...

  • @adugger8406

    @adugger8406

    Жыл бұрын

    thank you

  • @lindym9450
    @lindym9450 Жыл бұрын

    My friend said her BF kept lamenting how "perfect" she was all the time. During their 2 yr relationship, she discovered he was seeing another woman! So what's this about being perfect then?? She obviously wasn't perfect enough for him. Red flag: no discussion about living together or marriage. Thanks to Jonathan, we're now taught to look at his actions, not words! This guy's words were a lot of poppycock!!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Exactly

  • @beckywauer2291
    @beckywauer229110 ай бұрын

    Men only think with one thing. And it's not their brain!

  • @tereseday4060
    @tereseday4060 Жыл бұрын

    #4-Anyone who sleeps with someone who thinks they're going to convince them to get in a relationship later may as well buy a sunny spot in Alaska. It should be clear FIRST.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Lol

  • @marlenehaigler6603

    @marlenehaigler6603

    4 ай бұрын

    I don’t think so I married both my first husbands and we were intimate right away. I don’t agree with this first one died and the second one we were I was married for a long time to each.

  • @biondna7984
    @biondna7984 Жыл бұрын

    I absolutely agree that these topics are only safe in a well-developed relationship with a mature partner. Some topics are toxic whatever the answer. With my late beloved I didn't answer his curiosity about how many sexual partners I'd had, told him that topic is nothing but insecurity-producing, and didn't want that info from him either. He seemed content to leave it alone after that.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Exactly

  • @user-yo3rw5eu2n

    @user-yo3rw5eu2n

    9 ай бұрын

    To me there's only one reason to ask, and it's because the man has an issue with women who've been around. But it's fine for men to get around lol. Yeah I don't see a point in answering that either. And I don't think experience is a bad thing.

  • @aneva2464
    @aneva2464 Жыл бұрын

    Yes perfectly described my recent boyfriend, so emotionally constipated with his ego. 🙄

  • @EMuro-wu7uy
    @EMuro-wu7uy Жыл бұрын

    I felt great with the last guy, on third date I put in that for sex to happen I wanted to be in a relationship. He ghosted me, pulled back so fast. I called him on it, he refused to say he did, I let him know we're still friends but we don't talk at all anymore. I do want more from someone, than friends with benefits. And ghosting someone is so childish. If you can't be there, be honest about things.

  • @kareno8774

    @kareno8774

    Жыл бұрын

    Bravo - well said!❤

  • @alikazan24

    @alikazan24

    Жыл бұрын

    People (Men) who ghost are cowards. Like the phrase goes “a good man is hard to find.” If someone ghosts you, see it as a Blessing. Stay strong, it’s not easy.

  • @alikazan24

    @alikazan24

    Жыл бұрын

    Thank you! Women need to stop tiptoeing around men thinking if we’re “easy going” and lovable that it will endear us to our man of interest. Nope! It just sets us to being used. Set boundaries and create tests, and when they fail…Believe it!

  • @alikazan24

    @alikazan24

    Жыл бұрын

    Amen Jonathan

  • @mariegriffin7966
    @mariegriffin7966 Жыл бұрын

    I love how you are right to the point and not sugarcoating the truth about relationships. It’s definitely frustrating trying to find someone who have values and morals. I believe most ppl these days have lost respect for one another.

  • @anne-mariemcinnis9143
    @anne-mariemcinnis9143 Жыл бұрын

    Being vulnerable, transparent, honest and relationship oriented, does NOT mean being stupid! Some things are personal, in the past experiences, that need to remain just there. In the past! Now, that being said, if what we'd like to share, exceptionaly has the potential to grow an already "commited relationship", then things might be different. As long as one operates with "caution" and "discernement"...

  • @anne-mariemcinnis9143

    @anne-mariemcinnis9143

    Жыл бұрын

    @Dr Chris Grayson Vous avez à suivre des cours d'anglais car votre orthographe laisse à désirer. Et votre scam est des plus évident aussi. Trouvez vous un emploi honnête dans votre propre pays et arrêtez de scammer les gens dans le mien!!!

  • @cathyandresiak
    @cathyandresiak Жыл бұрын

    Maybe men should quit using women for sex when they know they never want a relationship with her. To me that is on them, men fooling women and using them for sex!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    That's why I teach women how to spot the users in my private coaching program 🙏

  • @hgfw9295

    @hgfw9295

    Жыл бұрын

    Celibacy is the only way to win on the dating scene. Or as a mature woman who actually wants to have sex, its good to be empowered to actually chose the man for this and become the milf or a cougar for the strong younger lover. Always think about your situation from the position of victory. Never the victim.

  • @siaitsme6800

    @siaitsme6800

    Жыл бұрын

    @@hgfw9295 So very true!

  • @lifelessonswithnoma

    @lifelessonswithnoma

    Жыл бұрын

    ​@@hgfw9295 i decided to become celibate almost a year ago, it was most beautiful thing i have ever done for myself

  • @alissagonzales735

    @alissagonzales735

    Жыл бұрын

    My cousin plus she is my best friend has been single by choice all her life. Never wanted children or marriage. So she goes out with some of her men friends because they are good in bed. Others are lousy as she puts it but are great to spend the day golfing or walking. She says not all her men friends want to go put the bed to use.

  • @angelajaables5537
    @angelajaables5537 Жыл бұрын

    I have always felt that I had to be perfect, flawless for a nice guy to be interested in me. Now, thanks to you, I understand where that feeling came from and I have dealt with it. I am positive about myself now and more confident. The belief I had stemmed out from things my dad would say that made me feel imperfect. Thank you Jonathan. 🙂

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    You are so welcome

  • @chrissyparks2000
    @chrissyparks20009 ай бұрын

    As a 66 year old woman, I have achieved emotional maturity and I know what I want and need. What I want and need now is a complete 180 from what I wanted when I was 20 or even 30! What Jonathan needs to do is the 5 things men need to do and don’t do when separated or newly divorced!! They are in NO position to jump into relationships! Jonathan concentrate on this. It’s rampant out there.

  • @katem4365
    @katem4365 Жыл бұрын

    I am confident in keeping certain experiences to myself unless I feel they inhibit me from functioning fully emotionally. Otherwise, we are adults w lives, loves, choices and trauma - I accept men for where they are at. I neither feel need to nurse, fix, bless or prop up a man. But, I would love to walk beside a man through life and build a soft landing for us both. In time, it will happen 🤗

  • @lindaalfonso9065
    @lindaalfonso9065 Жыл бұрын

    I agree that if it’s material to the relationship it’s good to talk about, otherwise there’s no need to get into the specifics of other relationships. We all go through things and grow and learn and change. Doesn’t make us bad people, just makes us human.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Exactly

  • @kimiakaguerard1000
    @kimiakaguerard10009 ай бұрын

    Your channel is so calming. It’s gives the “come as you are” feeling. Thank you for sharing about your personal experience and your insights. I’m sorry for your loss. It doesn’t matter how much time has passed. Have a good day, I hope you’ll enjoy your day! 😛

  • @primaprimavera357
    @primaprimavera357 Жыл бұрын

    Mystery is an important pard of seduction, it’s never seductive to be an open book…

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Seduction leads to short-lived experiences

  • @JL-yc5ns
    @JL-yc5ns7 ай бұрын

    The most important thing is to be yourself, true love doesn't need any strategies. Say what you want to say and share what you want to share with your loved one. If it is meant to be, it will be.

  • @michellejames4493
    @michellejames44939 ай бұрын

    This all makes so much sense - I wasted so much time doing the same thing over and again, expecting a different outcome. I now have a far better understanding of what emotional intimacy means… I am learning to say no and think about what I really want from a relationship. I’m worth much more than the crumbs I’ve been getting over the years. Thank you so much. 🙏😊

  • @carolynpeters4038
    @carolynpeters4038 Жыл бұрын

    Listening to YOU for 5 years. Dated & had 2 short relationships. I met my fiance Aug 5 22. I feel the very best with Geoff & He with me. Wedding is this August. Thank You for helping me Grow Learn & Love Me. Most importantly know who I needed

  • @stephanie7572

    @stephanie7572

    9 ай бұрын

    That's too soon...one year of dating? Slow it down, tell him you want to postpone the wedding till next August and cancel this one.

  • @cathyjennings5580
    @cathyjennings55808 ай бұрын

    Right to be CHOOSEY. SELECTIVITY IS ESSENTIAL!!!

  • @wejoin
    @wejoin Жыл бұрын

    Love books! I consumed self-help books after my divorce like crazy. I had two long-term relationships and therapy has also helped tremendously!! Every book you recommend I plan to read.❤️ Great suggestions!

  • @palomahealing5073
    @palomahealing5073 Жыл бұрын

    I like how you're so "real world" about relationships! And that's from your Coaching. You get to confront these real situations going on out there! It's wild...

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Yes! Thank you!

  • @rebeccacarraway480
    @rebeccacarraway480 Жыл бұрын

    AMEN to #1! All this talk about “body count” is SO confusing! How does this even come up in conversation? It’s no one’s business.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Because rarely do we meet virgins

  • @rebeccacarraway480

    @rebeccacarraway480

    Жыл бұрын

    @@JonathonAslay yea at our age??!? 🤣🤣🤣

  • @Snappypantsdance

    @Snappypantsdance

    Жыл бұрын

    I think people are so bold to talk about things that we used to blush thinking about talking about. I know my mom talked about holding hands being a big deal 60 years ago. How far we have come! Well, maybe fallen?

  • @elliesquires2753
    @elliesquires2753 Жыл бұрын

    Hey Johnathan. A great mention for girls from you, my last relationship (12yrs) for the first 10 months of our relationship he introduced me to MEN, as his girlfriend., but to WOMEN., I was his “FRIEND”, there became a breakdown of our relationship and when I told him the root was his difference of his description of me to the relationship, depending on who he was introducing me to., and that was indeed the root of our problem, once aware he changed his speak. Subconsciously I’m sure he was purposefully doing this. But once there was a descion he had to make which would make or break the relationship., his choice was to correct his title of me.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    That's great

  • @shelleysaville8732

    @shelleysaville8732

    Жыл бұрын

    Would like to know what Jonathan thinks about this & why do men do this ?

  • @hiannahgus574

    @hiannahgus574

    Жыл бұрын

    @@shelleysaville8732 I wonder if it is because they’re subconsciously (or consciously) keeping the other woman in their mind as a potential partner or option in case it doesn’t work out with you, his “friend” , and not wanting the other woman to know that he’s already in a committed relationship with you?

  • @ladylibertywdc8324

    @ladylibertywdc8324

    Жыл бұрын

    Players often use the term "friend" as a cover for "friends with benes". Blow their cover and walk away.

  • @wejoin

    @wejoin

    Жыл бұрын

    Wow...interesting! You are smart to clue in on that!

  • @randomreactions16
    @randomreactions169 ай бұрын

    OMG! YES! I use humor ALL THE TIME to deflect from uncomfortable situations. Whether it be emotional things, or just awkward situations. I find it works really well to avoid dark topics or going places emotionally that scare the crap out of me. lol

  • @heatherwilson9345
    @heatherwilson93459 ай бұрын

    Ohhh yes!! I read the "Untethered Soul" by Michael Singer when I first separated. Amazing read!! It helped me begin the inner healing. ❤

  • @char72
    @char728 ай бұрын

    I enjoyed watching your program. You do make me chuckle. People are very funny for sure. I am so sorry for your loss and admire how you can talk about him. I suppose most of us do feel like we could have been better parents and we try to figure out what we did wrong. Well, do we really have a blueprint to follow?? I was a parent at age 23. Did I have training to be a good parent? Heck no, who does? All I had to go on was how I was raised. My parents were not perfect. Dad had the idea that women did not need an education and mom believed that a woman needed it to survive independently. Of course, I followed my mom's idea, as I knew what it was like to be raised in a home when one is struggling just to put food on the table. I raised my daughter to know she had to have college to survive in this world. She became a nurse even while raising two daughters. I'm very proud of her today.

  • @tamarapackard5735
    @tamarapackard57359 ай бұрын

    Your videos are of great value. Thank you! I have used the term "emotionally constipated" to describe my ex husband. My picker is broken and I find myself afraid to get back out there to meet men. I desire a long term relationship... marriage or cohabitating. My last 12 yr relationship was with a man who was never going to commit. He told me he thought I would be fun so decided to date me. I thought I could change that because I'm so wonderful 🙄 It sure took me a long time to see and acknowledge that this wasn't going to change. Thank you for what you do.

  • @ellenbedford3888
    @ellenbedford38889 ай бұрын

    I’m at the end of my divorce, and I just met a very nice man, and have had some really nice conversations in person. He understands I have a disability and really doesn’t care that I have extra weight on my body - mostly from my meds and all the steroid shots I’ve been on. I’m not sure I want a relationship yet, but want to find out more about him - I could change my mind depending what I learn lol.

  • @dinalubin6498
    @dinalubin6498 Жыл бұрын

    Amazing video, Jonathon! Thank you btw for being so transparent about yourself, it’s one of the reasons I love your content so much. FYI “Tuesdays With Morrie” was written by Mitch Albom (writer from the Detroit Free Press)- one of my favourite books! I think you’d mentioned that Malcolm Gladwell wrote it. 🤗

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    My bad, you're correct... thanks 🙏

  • @palomahealing5073
    @palomahealing5073 Жыл бұрын

    Texting is the Worst communication resource!! You don't know the Tone of something being said? Whatever happened to this world, people?🤔

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Exactly!!!

  • @karenmckee1732
    @karenmckee17322 ай бұрын

    This was a great talk. Thank you!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    2 ай бұрын

    Glad you enjoyed it!

  • @auntylinda7640
    @auntylinda7640 Жыл бұрын

    Only share about your emotional insecurities with a professional cousellor or similar. Words learned the hard way. Take heed.

  • @cjoy8122
    @cjoy81228 ай бұрын

    i don’t like to always talk on phone because i typically talk all day at work, i like text and in person texting is fine throughout the day but i love in person

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    8 ай бұрын

    Me too...

  • @user-ry5ne6cj1u
    @user-ry5ne6cj1u8 ай бұрын

    Thanks a million for your program. I listen to it after midnight when I have nothing to distract me and I can think about what you said.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    8 ай бұрын

    You're very welcome

  • @monikawisniewska5100
    @monikawisniewska51008 ай бұрын

    Mr J. Aslay: you are genius! Your online webinars are super incredibly. I did not you exist unfortunately. If I knew you do the sort of online podcasts/lectures, I would join your KZread channel straight away. Thank you so much for what you do. It is super interesting, you are very approachable and speak in the matter, that it is understandable for everyone (regardless of their education, race, age, gender etc). Thank you!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    8 ай бұрын

    WOW! Thank you, and much appreciated. Any chance you share this video with friends?

  • @lh3957
    @lh3957 Жыл бұрын

    Great Insight. Thank you.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Glad it was helpful!

  • @powahrecords
    @powahrecords9 ай бұрын

    Great video ! I really like your content and advice. 💝 Also I have been in situations where there were men that first were unsure and you could think they were emotionally constipated. Then they turn around. Anyway, I also think sharing details is a societal thing, here in Sweden we are very open and I´m kind of used to people sharing a lot of intimate details and I don´t really have problem sharing that either.

  • @tereseday4060
    @tereseday4060 Жыл бұрын

    Yes, this is good stuff!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Thanks 🙏

  • @plantpoweredventures5240
    @plantpoweredventures52408 ай бұрын

    I needed to hear rhis. Thank you.

  • @robinemery
    @robinemery Жыл бұрын

    Well said!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Thanks 🙏

  • @juliefrecker3811
    @juliefrecker38115 ай бұрын

    Thanks Jonathon you just woke me up.

  • @donnahine9683
    @donnahine9683 Жыл бұрын

    Bravo! Your advice is great

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Glad it was helpful!

  • @janac2881
    @janac28819 ай бұрын

    Thank you Jonathon! Jana - Texas

  • @vitareid
    @vitareid8 ай бұрын

    Oh how I loved the insight seminars I attended. Completely changed my life in a huge way. The Cocktail Party exercise completely chanced my life. I was forever chsnged by Insight Seminars.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    8 ай бұрын

    Wonderful!

  • @INTELLITHINK
    @INTELLITHINK8 ай бұрын

    BECAUSE THE RIGHT PERSON, we share everything. I know the words he does it say eludes to. But all discussed from the jump

  • @MaryDunford
    @MaryDunford Жыл бұрын

    Perfect timing. It seems to be raining men. I'd like to get it right this time. Thanks! 😊

  • @kathyduer7108
    @kathyduer7108 Жыл бұрын

    AMEN Jonathan ❤ I love how you are so real and down to earth. Tell it like it is. No bs. Wish we could clone you so we could all have a good man at least once in our life. 😊

  • @bak6194
    @bak61948 ай бұрын

    In regards to not sharing your insecurities and character flaws I think it's a good thing to do as long as you also follow up with the fact that you accept yourself fully the way that you are and love yourself the way that you are and realize you are all on a journey. Of course deeper in the relationship seriously, if you can't be real you're not with the right person

  • @RachelSDay1982
    @RachelSDay19829 ай бұрын

    Hugs, Jonathon!! 🤗

  • @CC-yt8wk
    @CC-yt8wk Жыл бұрын

    Informative video ❤🎉

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Glad you think so!

  • @clairesnibbe1878
    @clairesnibbe18789 ай бұрын

    Don’t tell a potential partner anything you might regret because you might and probably would blame a potential breakup on telling him too much. Still tongue in a wise head ❤ Heartbreak Can be avoided! It is forever a miracle to me that relationships actually get to exist! I have liberated myself from the need to be in a relationship thus I am in the enviable position of rejoicing in the good relationships of those fortunate few couples whom I happen to know.

  • @suzanne688
    @suzanne688 Жыл бұрын

    I’ve been listening to you for quite a few weeks now. Been very helpful and insightful. Thank you!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    You are so welcome

  • @amandaroberts5111
    @amandaroberts5111 Жыл бұрын

    Wow l can't imagine what you have been through, l only just found your videos. You beam wisdom and love, thank you

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    I've been through a lot...

  • @juliefrecker3811
    @juliefrecker38115 ай бұрын

    I learned a lot from this video! Wish I knew this info years ago.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    5 ай бұрын

    Glad it was helpful!

  • @kimfreeman8566
    @kimfreeman85668 ай бұрын

    If a man offered you a bouquet of RED FLAGS AND CRUMBS...RUN! 😂

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    8 ай бұрын

    Lol

  • @karisattler454
    @karisattler4549 ай бұрын

    That's an awesome book!!

  • @maryannbroadbridge1119
    @maryannbroadbridge1119 Жыл бұрын

    LOL! When you said "broken picker" I thought you said "broken pecker". 😁 Great video. Thanks!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Lol

  • @Snappypantsdance

    @Snappypantsdance

    Жыл бұрын

    Lol, me too right at first 😅

  • @annresnik6059
    @annresnik6059 Жыл бұрын

    So glad you admitted of about 80% of people online have challenges and are "ego-centric". That's what I have found, too.

  • @Snappypantsdance

    @Snappypantsdance

    Жыл бұрын

    Thank you for sharing your experience on that too:).

  • @sarcodonblue2876

    @sarcodonblue2876

    Жыл бұрын

    I would say it is the general population

  • @sarahkennedy1481
    @sarahkennedy1481 Жыл бұрын

    If I had a daughter I would install confidence in her. I would get her to educate and save money for security. To be healthy and look after skin and figure. Not to give body away and stay single unless they find a quality man!

  • @sarcodonblue2876

    @sarcodonblue2876

    Жыл бұрын

    We are brainwashed to think there is someone out there for everyone though.

  • @camwestart
    @camwestart8 ай бұрын

    Amen Jonathon

  • @cathyjennings5580
    @cathyjennings55808 ай бұрын

    Preferences is essential knowledge is essential to be understood & accepted. Her mechanics. Secrets. Trust is best interests for her well being before . During. & AFTER & FUTURE HEALTH. WHOLEBODY!!.

  • @missysmuses
    @missysmuses9 ай бұрын

    i have purchased all the books you suggested, in audible format.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    9 ай бұрын

    👍🏼

  • @margaretcampbell2681
    @margaretcampbell2681 Жыл бұрын

    You definitely don’t want to talk about sex with your past partners this goes for men and women

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Yes

  • @shelleysaville8732
    @shelleysaville8732 Жыл бұрын

    Enjoy your videos & admire your reality approach.😃😃😃😃😃

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    I appreciate that!

  • @Gisela8603
    @Gisela86039 ай бұрын

    This is so interesting thank you 😊

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    9 ай бұрын

    You are so welcome!

  • @bystandersarah
    @bystandersarah Жыл бұрын

    Why do I have to read lots of books to understand when others do just fine without it😢 I have too many other things to do in my life. It’s too much to have to make this a whole hobby. It seems like this should be much easier🤔if it’s not easy, maybe it’s not meant to be…

  • @RachelSDay1982
    @RachelSDay19829 ай бұрын

    Resonating swimmingly!! 👍👍

  • @ruthm711
    @ruthm711 Жыл бұрын

    Thank you!!! ❤

  • @terrisolaroli4169
    @terrisolaroli41699 ай бұрын

    Your Orchid is lovely!🍃

  • @rhondachristensen8619
    @rhondachristensen8619 Жыл бұрын

    👍👍👍but its life, Jonathan. Thank you for sharing ..!!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    You bet!

  • @lanishortsunshine5773
    @lanishortsunshine5773 Жыл бұрын

    Thank u...sooo much for alll this.....i feel like you have really ...helped me...i can grow..now.....wow....your an amazing teacher....cheers! X o

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    So nice of you

  • @EMuro-wu7uy
    @EMuro-wu7uy Жыл бұрын

    I look forward to your videos, I'm not back to dating yet. I did date again briefly, I'm still angry and cynical since then. I'm reading a few of the books. So thank you for the videos

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    You got this!

  • @EMuro-wu7uy

    @EMuro-wu7uy

    Жыл бұрын

    Thank you, I'm just enjoying my own life. Too many guys tell me what they want from me. One was mean to me as a customer and recently asked me out, he almost got me fired. So I let him know very nicely, if you are mean and rude to a woman, almost get them fired, why would I want to go out with you? I'm still pissed about it, and I see no reason to go out with someone who would treat any person like that.

  • @ginnywalker184
    @ginnywalker184 Жыл бұрын

    I love your perspective and your honesty and find your advice helpful. I'd much rather have honesty than BS. Thank you!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    I appreciate that!

  • @samiyam3949
    @samiyam39499 ай бұрын

    Glad I found your channel

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    9 ай бұрын

    Welcome aboard!

  • @musicdesign7264
    @musicdesign7264 Жыл бұрын

    After one month on Match, again no Match. Not for lack of effort. In the meantime, I watch your videos. Most live too far or want to have fun, no rush for a relationship.

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    How many messages did you get?

  • @musicdesign7264

    @musicdesign7264

    Жыл бұрын

    ​@@JonathonAslay very few, and nobody I would want. I did initiate over 25 emails. Some of those lived over an hour away due to lack of men in my area. I may have gotten maybe one email back but then it fizzled out. So after 1 month, I have nobody to pursue a relationship with.

  • @libbynovotny9979

    @libbynovotny9979

    Жыл бұрын

    i went on match for free , did not want to spend money. So hard to find an older guy where I live not a populated state!

  • @musicdesign7264

    @musicdesign7264

    Жыл бұрын

    ​@Libby Novotny I was doing the free week trials every few months. Got a great offer and tried. I agree. Finding someone not easy. I have willing to relocate on my profile too.

  • @alikazan24
    @alikazan24 Жыл бұрын

    Nothing worse than “throwing pearls before swine!”

  • @xolisankonki8006
    @xolisankonki8006 Жыл бұрын

    '. Emotionally constipated ? ' very interesting..😏😏

  • @okdk7
    @okdk7 Жыл бұрын

    IDK... when to share a "shame" story.... some things never need to be shared if you are not getting married. Think, if this relationship fails... what is this person going to "blah blah blah" about you ? TRUST is a thing, but idk... Just thinking out loud.

  • @shelleysaville8732
    @shelleysaville8732 Жыл бұрын

    Thanks again 😄

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Welcome 😊

  • @pam164
    @pam164 Жыл бұрын

    When an ex was trying to be my 'friend' after he broke up with me, he hinted what would I think if he dressed as a woman? High heels, stockings etc? I freaked out then he backtracked and said a woman wanted him to dress that way, and he said no. I blocked him, and thought I had a lucky escape. Always felt he was hiding something big from me but not that.

  • @eesynopsis7393

    @eesynopsis7393

    Жыл бұрын

    yikes

  • @pam164

    @pam164

    Жыл бұрын

    @@eesynopsis7393 Yep can you imagine lol

  • @sarcodonblue2876

    @sarcodonblue2876

    Жыл бұрын

    He had a gross fetish. Good on you for blocking him

  • @c.a.r.4834
    @c.a.r.48345 ай бұрын

    So…, my experience is that I only had committed, monogamous relationships with men I‘m not initially attracted to…. However: these commitments represented a betrayal, as these men who only represented a compromise to me were never the ones being loyal, true, or cared about my needs…. Therefore, I‘m over this „dating the smaller guy“ … if I‘m not really attracted to a man physically, chances are it’s only downhill from there… usually there is no grand improvement or finale from there. I was alone in all these compromise-relationships and I am alone all the time now… unless a man is truly I‘m looking for, I have no incentive to settle!!!

  • @Southern-Lady
    @Southern-Lady Жыл бұрын

    It’s time for me to be a Badass! 😁

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Amen 🙏

  • @wendysteinberg2595
    @wendysteinberg25959 ай бұрын

    I am old now and wish I had the mind I have now when I was young. I haven't dated in decades, and it was a laughable endeavor even then. Sounds like people still need help not to sound like an idiot now. Good luck young people and just enjoy your moments.

  • @lanat665
    @lanat665 Жыл бұрын

    Thanks!

  • @JonathonAslay

    @JonathonAslay

    Жыл бұрын

    Wow, thank you

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