10 Things Elegant People NEVER Do
Тәжірибелік нұсқаулар және стиль
Mistakes can cost you opportunities and sabotage your future! Unless you correct them in time and do better! Live a more fabulous future by taking part in my FREE workshop: fabulousfutureformula.com/
Check out these TOP related video:
Find out the 10 Things That Tell You HAVE Class here: • 10 Things That Tell Yo...
Find out another 10 Things That Tell You HAVE Class here: • 10 Things That Tell Yo...
10 Things That Tell You're Old Money: • 10 Things That Tell Yo...
--------------------
⚜️WHO IS ANNA BEY?⚜️
Anna Bey is an elegance expert and educator, teaching women how to transform their lives to enjoy a more refined personal presence and lifestyle. She's been featured in The Times UK, Newsweek, New York Post, Cosmopolitan and many more. For more information about Anna, visit: annabey.com
⚜️Follow Anna on Instagram, where you'll be able to get to know her on a more personal level: / annabey
⚜️Start your transformation with me by taking one of my courses: levelupclass.com/
--------------------
❤️Don't forget to subscribe to my channel, like, comment, and share if you liked this video and it was valuable to you. Thank you for watching!
#annabey
Пікірлер: 1 800
Mistakes can cost you opportunities and sabotage your future! Unless you correct them in time and do better! I can help you by sharing all the mistakes I've made in this private and by-invitation-only video that you can watch for FREE if you register on: levelupsecret.com
@zazamafra2145
Жыл бұрын
Hi Anna 🍀
@emmalat963
Жыл бұрын
💌
@farhana2468
Жыл бұрын
Hi Anna, could you please make a informative video on skill based career opportunities for women . It would be very helpful to us who wanna be a self independent personality with Elegance.
@marissashantez6051
Жыл бұрын
Thats not how you pronounce it. Its not Anna. Its pronounced "Ahnnah Wintoor". But you are 100% right. She has the manners of a swamp rat.
@user-mc4og9zr3d
Жыл бұрын
Hi Anna! It's been a few years since you made your teen special video, so I was wondering if you could make another one/ make some tips for elegance in schools or colleges. It would be very much appreciated 💕💕
I've had dinner parties ruined by guests who wanted to "help" and ended up taking over my kitchen to prepare their special dish. I don't like people in my kitchen when I'm preparing a meal--talking to me, getting in my way, wanting to "help," telling me how to do things, cleaning up for me, etc. So definitely, no means no.
@ChiaraFrancioli
Жыл бұрын
Absolutely, years later I still remember a friend who insisted with helping clearing out curry splattered dishes, our countertop hadn’t been sealed yet, she wouldn’t take no for an answer and all I could think was “we both don’t want you staining our half installed kitchen, why are you insisting so much?”
@susan7374
Жыл бұрын
Yup, i hate people in my kitchen. Just no
@ChiaraFrancioli
Жыл бұрын
Just to clarify, I didn’t tell her that phrase, but my mind was stuck with the question: this is so uncomfortable for both of us so why pushing it?
@PC-ch1md
Жыл бұрын
I like people to help me do the dishes for me but then again where I grew up having hired help is normal so people don’t usually offer to help
@APTTMHYforever
Жыл бұрын
One of the many reasons why I hate “open concept” living/kitchen homes… I prefer enclosed kitchens with a nice big window over the sink
Helping clean up after a meal is EXPECTED and a sign of respect in South Mississippi USA. That’s all I know.
@Angela-zf8sn
4 ай бұрын
Alabama also
@humblebee7979
4 ай бұрын
In many Eastern countries as well. It's actually rude not to help.
@susanmarie3425
4 ай бұрын
Offering to help is a sign of respect in the Midwest USA. When someone declines your help, you respect their wishes.
@myinnermagpie
4 ай бұрын
I offer to help when in other homes. But I really would rather relax with the other guests after the meal. In my own home I insist that guests do nothing except clearing the table if we’re going to still be sitting there. I’d rather spend time with my guests and clean later. But I get why some people would rather relax while knowing everything is clean and tidy.
@ginalangston9428
4 ай бұрын
South Carolina too. It's a modern tribal behavior...it takes a village. It's about appreciation for what it takes and it is shown by offering some relief.
So I would like to add something… Many people think it is ok to eliminate your filter because you are a senior citizen. As a 68 year old lady, I would like to implore other elders to always maintain your manners. It is NEVER ok to behave badly. I love your videos Anna! Elegance is about good manners and our society seems to have lost manners. Keep up your wonderful work!
@Heavens-Humanaterian-Army
Жыл бұрын
You are a true classy lady...I'm over young and old thinking it's a new trend to not care about others feelings..its not cool to be all hard tough and not care.
@alexeforgues2286
Жыл бұрын
behaving badly means eating with your mouth open (gross), speaking over others, etc. not putting your coat on a chair or crossing your legs etc. the most important manner to have is to not be judgy to others because they don't behave exactly how we think they should. this whole thing is super elitist and it's bs. be kind to others, wait for others to start eating, listen, share your love and that should do it. life is too short.
@arielleh7100
Жыл бұрын
Some people with dementia lose their filter as a result of cognitive decline so it's good to keep that in mind and give them the benefit of the doubt. (Of course, that's not always the case)
@islandpersuasion4690
Жыл бұрын
Truth hurts. 🤷♀️
@pamaliereynolds4752
11 ай бұрын
@@arielleh7100 Yes, we must try to avoid being judgy, instead, try to be compassionate. By all means, when one senses a dangerous situation, leave immediately and get help.
As a 64 yr old woman who is often cold I think of the years I was cold to look good. Now I don’t care if I’m not elegant. My wrap will remain on the back of my chair so I can put it on if needed. And after 32 years of digestive issues, if I must go to the bathroom mid-meal, so be it. Much better than the alternative. Mostly, though, I feel this list is about respecting others. Always good advice. ❤
@CatsAreNiceMeow
Жыл бұрын
I have a few autoimmune disorders so I go from hot to cold quickly. I must have a sweater or jacket nearby no matter how well prepared I am.
@saramoraisss
8 ай бұрын
I totally agree!
@stizelswik3694
2 ай бұрын
@@CatsAreNiceMeow Especially if I'm wearing sleeveless or short sleeves!
@teleriferchnyfain
15 күн бұрын
Thank you LOL
I think talking loudly on the phone in public places is the worst. A quick quiet conversational may be necessary occasionally but there are limits. Love all of these reminders. 💚
@dale3404
Жыл бұрын
So true. I’m not interested in your conversation. Why do you want to broadcast all of your business to the world?
@heatherstella2528
11 ай бұрын
Agree!
@rena6895
4 ай бұрын
I use to travel for work, often I would order my meals to go, & eat at my desk in my hotel room, but sometimes I wanted to sit at a real table & use real silverware. At times one of my sons, a co-worker, my boss or maybe a friend would call. Traveling Monday through Friday could get very lonely, I welcomed the rare call. I am more of a texting or email kind of lady. I was guilty of talking quietly on my phone while waiting on my meal. Nothing inappropriate. I was not any louder than the conversations at the tables around me. Just food for thought next time you are annoyed, it may be a someone whose on the road alone all the time. I am not making excuses, just being honest.
@stizelswik3694
2 ай бұрын
If I have to be someplace public, I turn the volume off on my phone and don't answer calls until I'm away from there and can freely talk with no other ears tucked in.
After placing an order and before food is served is a very appropriate time to go to the restroom and wash one hands. There is a strong possibility that bread will be served in a common basket, as well as the passing of appetizers, therefore any hands which will come in contact should be cleansed after handling menus which are contaminants.
@MrsPicklesIsHome
2 ай бұрын
The second we touch the bread basket or the plate the appetizers are on, our hands are contaminated again. I always keep a tiny bottle of hand sanitizer with reach.
@margocarmichael6765
2 ай бұрын
And don't pass your phone around to show photographs to everyone at the table. The phone is one of the dirtiest objects in your whole house!
I don’t see anything wrong with draping your coat on the back of your seat. Besides, most establishments don’t have a “cloakroom” for hanging coats! Also, I would not be comfortable hanging my coat with other random people’s coats due to crossover smells & the slim possibility my coat might get taken by someone
@michynature
Жыл бұрын
I think if the establishment you are dining at has a cloakroom, you likely do not have to worry about theft etc. I mean I wouldn’t leave my valuables in it perhaps…
@DaisyChain3339.
11 ай бұрын
We aren't talking about Applebee's here.
@gracedrosie5127
11 ай бұрын
Its true ! i have personally experienced a monclear jacket taken in the cloakroom, it was a mistake but it happened and he never get it back.
@sequana92
9 ай бұрын
Au moins avec la veste sur la chaise je suis sûre de ne pas l'oublier et qu'elle ne soit pas volée.
@J0j0l0lPl4i
7 ай бұрын
I have a long coat and at the restaurant if I leave it on my chair the waiter/waitress would trip over it or people would just walk on it and leave foot print 🤦♀️
If you need the restroom for whatever reason (ie: wash hands before a meal, clear a runny noise or void your bladder) I think it is perfectly acceptable to do so. As a mother of two adult children (who were very large babies) my bladder doesn’t always cooperate with my plans or wishes, so I always need frequent trips to the nearest restroom and this is not something I can postpone until a more opportune time.
@olindalee4941
Жыл бұрын
Absolutely!
@leesteal4458
Жыл бұрын
She was talking about after the neal has started so I am sure you eould have already washed your hands prior to starting your meal. I am sure where sickness or incontinence is concerned, noone would fault you using the bathroom.
@janinawaz4596
Жыл бұрын
I think you may have misunderstood. She never said don't use the bathroom. She called someone out for spending 20 minutes in the loo to surreptitiously watch a football match. And she advised us not to announce what we're doing (using the toilet), just to excuse yourself.
@sarahh.8579
Жыл бұрын
@@janinawaz4596 She said not to use the bathroom during the first course. Sometimes you can't wait.
@janinawaz4596
Жыл бұрын
@@sarahh.8579 I listened to that segment again. You were correct, and I was mistaken. She does declare an "ideal time in a perfect world" to use the restroom. I agree, that's a bit too restrictive. It's not always healthy or possible to wait until before dessert, especially when you're enjoying multiple courses and maybe some wine. (Alcohol being a diuretic.)
I have to say that I love love love that you’re not afraid or too “above” showing your past mistakes and using yourself as an example. It’s so bold, it’s so human and lovely, you should be very proud of yourself because in a world of so many filters and hiding all flaws, you are refreshingly honest and by consequence trustworthy to listen to! I take my hat off 💕
@CC-sm8xv
Жыл бұрын
Anna is so humble and down-to-earth. We’re all just human, trying to be our best.
@kiranjitKaur61
Жыл бұрын
Hmmm.
@LookupintheAER
Жыл бұрын
The whole point of her channel is to sell you a course that will turn you into a copycat of her brand. It's the exact opposite of human.
@kiranjitKaur61
Жыл бұрын
@@LookupintheAER It be rather Divine.
@LookupintheAER
Жыл бұрын
@@kiranjitKaur61 Idc how happy it makes me; if it's unethical, I won't do it.
Respecting boundaries in other’s people houses is the most important thing. Guests might not be welcome in the whole house.
@IrishAnnie
Жыл бұрын
We shut doors of any rooms we do not want visitors to stroll through.
@melissaherrera940
6 ай бұрын
Respecting boundaries is overall important. But there are some instances and in some cultures where a guest should help to be seen as gracious. Hosts want to treat their guests but don’t want to be reduced to servants either.
I appreciate the kitchen tip! I always used to feel guilty for saying "no thank you" to help. My reason was that accepting help was more stressful for me, because I am not comfortable managing or delegating to others. This makes me feel more comfortable about refusing.
Your comments about Anna Wintour were so spot on. It was rude beyond rude to wear sunglasses indoors, sitting next to the Queen. You shouldn’t be doing that to ANYONE, let alone a queen, in a formal setting. I’m so shocked. You’d thought people with higher status like Ms. Wintour would understand rules of etiquette better. Or maybe she’s just so full of herself and thinks she needs not to show respect to anyone. “Queen of England? Nah! Queen of fashion is more important”.
@TheSkandranon
8 ай бұрын
And notice that in those clips she showed, the queen never really turned towards her to talk
@R_S747
7 ай бұрын
@@TheSkandranonright? It's so awkward watching her lean in, i find it uncomfortable when people do that to me
@lynda5542
7 ай бұрын
The queen is definitely giving Anna the cold shoulder. Yes, wearing her shades indoors is beyond rude. I always lift my sunglasses when outside as I speak to someone. I leave them up unless there is a big glare. Anna is so high & mighty. Editor-in-chief of Vogue, big deal.
@martina21953
4 ай бұрын
@@lynda5542 Anna needs to learn some manners and maybe change her look once every century or so.
@dileniaa.8580
4 ай бұрын
There is no surprise for me. These people may have such a big ego.
Dear Anna, please, make more etiquette videos! Looks matter but at the end of the day it’s our manners what people mention and remember the most about us!
@NFTeve
Жыл бұрын
Yes. Ist good to know every detail!
@ericsonhazeltine5064
Жыл бұрын
Agreed!
@mstwelvedeadlycyns
Жыл бұрын
Not all the time. If Rihanna was rude you will still accept it because she is beautiful. I do not care what anyone says!
@simatavakoli5631
Жыл бұрын
@@mstwelvedeadlycyns Rude is RUDE .no matter how one looks .
@mstwelvedeadlycyns
Жыл бұрын
@@simatavakoli5631 I very much doubt that
The Queen is a great example of elegance. There are a number of people who frequently make an etiquette faux pas with her. Rather than act snobby or correct them, she handles it graciously.
@howint1578
Жыл бұрын
It's an elegant way to handle it, sometimes we really don't know.
@trishna_6815
Жыл бұрын
yes, manners are about making the other person feel comfortable. so it would be incredibly rude and bad mannered to make someone feel bad for not knowing the 'rules'
@beckycollins8923
Жыл бұрын
@@trishna_6815 She also has a reputation to uphold so being badly mannered would be a major faux pas and probably all that people would remember about a perfect event.
@sashanoel8766
Жыл бұрын
Wealth by way of imperialism over nations of color is not elegant. I don’t care how superficial etiquette she has.
@MysiaLusia
Жыл бұрын
Maybe she is smart enough to understand that not everyone respect the title and agreed to be part of some "game" that was made dacades ago due to privilege and titles. Me personally believe in equality and for me she is just as any other human being. We live in XXI century :-)
As a former customer service rep, one of the most annoying things was when people where having very private conversations in front of me like I wasn't a person. They would talk about custody, court cases, very personal matters. Hi. I can hear you.
@dileniaa.8580
4 ай бұрын
You are right. This is so disrespectful!
Anna, I have been watching your channel for a couple of weeks. I consider myself to be fashionable and take care with my appearance and manners. I have made a few small changes since watching you, namely I have started to focus on dressing well at home, not just when we go out or I am going to work or shopping. My husband literally just texted me “You looked so elegant and beautiful today.” I thought that you would enjoy that as well. So, thank you. I appreciate your advice. It is nice to see a woman who behaves like a lady. That is how we are raising our daughter, and we expect our sons to be able to take care of their (future) ladies.
@LookupintheAER
Жыл бұрын
So you teach your daughter "how to be a lady," but you teach your sons how to take care of ladies? Why are you continuing the sexism?
@montamiddleton9318
Жыл бұрын
Let's see. You raise your daughter to be a princess and your sons to expect a submission wife. Lovely. 🙄
@kelleyr8702
Жыл бұрын
@@montamiddleton9318 no ma’am I did not say either of those things. My daughter is a straight A student, bilingual, plays the piano, runs cross country, and volunteers. She is well-mannered, polite, and also able to stand up for herself. She appreciates being treated with respect. Our son knows that it is appropriate to open doors for ladies, pull out their chairs, and generally to be respectful. Unfortunately our current culture erroneously considers those things to be negative and demeaning. To each his own.
@angelsub9184
Жыл бұрын
@@kelleyr8702 That's awful country. My country also view something like table manner, elegance ladies are just "too much" and "arrogant" because my country is South East Asia. Of course, there are elegance rich people here, but many are poor and does not have any sense of elegance.
@katykatforeverx
Жыл бұрын
You should teach your daughter to actually take care of herself and provide for herself financially. The elegant methods are fine but it’s also important to teach her not to groom or change herself so men can tell her “oh wow you’re beautiful and elegant”. She should be improving herself for HERSELF. And not relying on some man. Teach her to be better than you.
Point # 2 had me LOL... Our Family would find you incredibly rude if you "didn't" automatically get up and help clean up after dinner, especially when they've just prepared you a meal. That is definitely a culturally diverse topic, I believe.
@Tica232
Жыл бұрын
In which country?
@bernitajenkins3180
Жыл бұрын
Spot on. Entertaining, maybe, but some of these points are not so relevant in most circles. Even my wealthy friends aren't this anal.
@louise7401
Жыл бұрын
Would this apply to both men and women?
@DnAMcD
Жыл бұрын
@@Tica232 South Sea Island culture. The country is actually not really relevant when it's a cultural expectation.
@DnAMcD
Жыл бұрын
@@louise7401 Yes, it does.
I still remember when my dad's friends sent cakes to my baby shower . They wanted to come to the event but men were not allowed there. It felt such a personal and familial gesture. Made it super special.
@Tinsx3r9
Жыл бұрын
In my circle, we expect men to attend showers.
@carolynrjackson
Жыл бұрын
Men at a baby shower is a big no no in my culture (English)!
I literally watched a man complain today in Neiman Marcus about the ladies at the beauty counter talking loud and being vulgar and it took away from his shopping experience. So I agree there’s a time and a place for everything etiquette is some thing that definitely needs to continuously be stressed. Thank you for this video
@marilynbrown5274
Жыл бұрын
Yes, bad language should never happen in Department Stores...unimaginavle at Beauty Counters.
@montamiddleton9318
Жыл бұрын
Hey, I'm an older person and not a Neiman Marcus kinda shopper. But I heard 2 employees talk about their former drug use in a Goodwill store. Why do people think we all need to hear your conversation. We should only hear Hello, can I help you find anything? Period.
@Lilly-rl6up
Жыл бұрын
@@montamiddleton9318 It sounds like they were having a private conversation and you decided to eavesdrop instead of just ignoring it because it didn't involve you...
@deadroomeyes8965
Жыл бұрын
@@montamiddleton9318 snooty
@susannpatton2893
Жыл бұрын
@Monta Middleton maybe they were trying to help their coworker NOT do them. And you overheard it. Try not listening
This is why I love Anna...she's not afraid to be open about her life lessons. This is what makes her authentic.
I always excuse myself after ordering my meal to wash my hands after handling the menu, which isn’t clean after being handled by so many people. I don’t announce where I’m going but would not want to eat without washing my hands. I honestly never heard this was improper but I doubt I will stop this practice. I am aware that if you get up from the dining table you are supposed to place your napkin on your chair, which I don’t do because I don’t care to wipe my mouth with a napkin that has been on a chair seat people sit on. As always, enjoying your content.
@hadilayyad6147
Жыл бұрын
I do the same exact thing you do, I don’t see how or why it would be considered inelegant, since I feel like eating with dirty hands or wiping with a dirty napkin is improper.
@cherylkoski7184
3 ай бұрын
No, napkin goes on table.
@anaelmm
19 күн бұрын
That’s exactly what I do after ordering and like you say handling the menu. I was surprised she didn’t touch that point and asking myself, don’t people was their hands… lol.
@ann3654
11 күн бұрын
Do you eat your food with your fingers then.
Love the video, but you did not address what to do with your coat/sweater/jacket, etc when there are no cloak rooms. ???? Thanks
Btw, talking about cleaning dishes etiquette in host's house. I think the 2nd point is actually depends on the culture and background of the person involved. As people's up bringing from every country is different. Such as me in Indonesia, if you're lets say a younger generation who's visiting your friend's house, people tend to like you more if you're doing their dishes because it symbolize that you're a hardworking and reliable person who eager to help the family even to do the simplest task. So it might be different from every culture. But if the person is born into a wealthy family, fo sho they'll have maids and no need to do such gesture. I think it might apply similar in almost every culture as well.
I was a medical receptionist and this woman just got out of her OB-GYN appointment. She comes back to check in for a post visit laboratory order and announced loudly in the lobby- on her phone call that she has clamydia 😂
@cc1k435
6 күн бұрын
Well, now, we can ask for more than one reason, "Where are her parents?" 🤣😆
Anna, please never ever stop posting. WE NEED YOU!
@meijie9171
Жыл бұрын
Yes we need ✨😮😮
@studyhardplayhard5086
Жыл бұрын
you dont need this woman. you guys are so brainwashed by her. you should probably research her before worshiping her. hopefully you havent given her any of your money
Anna, I love how you put little anecdotes to explain your points, it makes your video so interesting. And I also love how you started sharing some of your own recent mistakes. Thank you Anna, this video was so helpful!
Dear Anna, David Beckham, in my humble opinion is not an elegant man. Just because he’s a celebrity doesn’t make him elegant, as most would think. This is where I believe the public has to rethink who they idolize and why. It’s time to step up our own game of celeb and elegance! And that’s where you are helping us. Thanks for your hard work! 🙏❤️
OMG! You are so right about Anna Wintour and the sunglasses!. She knew she would be sitting next to QEII. Why would she upstage her by wearing that ghastly floral dress? The queen looks livid.
Wearing sunglasses indoors is bizarre unless it's a funeral, signature style or not.
@jenniesheppard8684
Жыл бұрын
It’s pretentious in my opinion.
@tulip811
Жыл бұрын
Excuse me I'm wearing sunglasses with strength and I'm not gonna take them off at the store on sunny days !!
@Mmmmkaaay
Жыл бұрын
@@tulip811 by all means, continue to look like a pompous jackass in public. 😂🙄
@chimeraSF
Жыл бұрын
I am photo sensitive and bright sunlight can cause horrendous migraines. I wear prescription eyeglasses with transitional lenses which adjust to the environment. Sometimes when I step indoors the lenses are dark! It takes a few minutes for them to adjust to the light of the room.
@Ayyeliki
Жыл бұрын
Except when our eyes are dilated after an ophthalmologist appt ! 🤣🤣🤷🏼♀️
During lockdown I had to go to the gas station one day, and while I was standing at the counter paying for my stuff a woman got in line behind me and talked loudly on her phone about her colonoscopy. She was also so close to me that I could feel her breath and spittle flying onto the back of my arm. Not elegant!
@lesleyvivien2876
2 ай бұрын
Ugh. A few years ago, it was summer, and I was wearing short sleeves. I got on a bus, and the man I sat next to decided to strike up a conversation. Spittle all over my arm. Ugh again.
Tip #9 is a really good one. I always feel bad when I have to decline an invitation, and sending a small token or flowers is a great idea to sort of make up for your absence. Thank you. :)
@womanofacertainage5892
Жыл бұрын
I loved that tip, too and will start doing that when I can't attend an event. Thank you, Anna!
It is fairly common place in the Norhtern United State to find a cloak room, or a place near the entrance to hang one's coat (and leave the gloves, hats etc...). In the Southern US, that is rarely available, even though it does get cold enough at times in the winter that a coat is required. Granted they often don't have a lot of indoor heat, but when I eat, I find wearing my coat constricting. So draped over the back of the chair it must go.
A person or a group of people laughing really loudly when everyone around them is calm and quiet is the biggest elegance mistake. And people do this a lot.
@kimberlyperrotis8962
Жыл бұрын
Especially here in the US. I’m American, too, but I’m always astonished at how loud many people are in public.
@mayanovak2497
Жыл бұрын
That makes me cringe so bad
@bamafencer12
Жыл бұрын
Staring too. I hate it.
@ilovesunsets
Жыл бұрын
I just came back from dinner and there 6 ladies were so loud that easily everyone in the restaurant could've joined the conversation. Their exuse? What? It's my birthday! 😑
@beautifulhomemaking
Жыл бұрын
@@bamafencer12 Speaking from experience, some people might stare because they are nearsighted and it takes a while for our eyes to focus on objects or people farther away.
Point #2 is dependent on culture I think. I’d say just play it safe and always offer to help with dishes and clearing the table. Now, if the host insists on doing it themselves then just relax and enjoy your time there.
Anna, I know your channel is intended for elegant ladies, but there's so much a man can learn from your advice as well. Thanks for posting.
I love your videos so much! I would say Jennifer Lawrence said what she did because she is self effacing. She didn’t really want to own her epitaph of hottest actress, etc. that she was introduced as because she was embarrassed by the over the top intro and wanted to address that in a humble manner. She jokes about herself a lot and likes to be quirky and relatable. If she had appeared to accept that intro on its face- believe me, the media would have roasted her mercilessly.
@cristiana987
Жыл бұрын
Yeah, I thought the same thing
@momoxiaoshizi
Жыл бұрын
Haha, agree. And Beck chew his gums. You can marry a tramp, but I can’t chew my gum?
@iamjustsaying4787
Жыл бұрын
@Emilee Cleaver Her tone was contemptuous. Two wrongs never make it right. I have seen this woman in public though she thought that she was incognito and she was rude. Celebrity worship is childish.
@emileecleaver8247
Жыл бұрын
@@iamjustsaying4787 I agree that celebrity worship is childish. I recognize there are a lot of personality types out there and to think the worst of people instead of seeing their true intentions is misguided and narrow.
The problem with coat rooms is that someone else can take your coat, either by mistake or on purpose.
@bamafencer12
Жыл бұрын
Yes!! Especially if it's a nice coat.
@amandakim6901
Жыл бұрын
Not to mention most places in the US don’t have coat rooms 🤷♀️
@anoukc6928
Жыл бұрын
That happened to me many years ago. Someone took my jacket (I think it was by mistake because there was a similar jacket left that was unclaimed). Now I'm not comfortable to leave my coat anywhere
@lindac6919
Жыл бұрын
We generally don't have them on the West Coast. I'm sure that exceptionally elegant places have them.
@susanhudgens5192
Жыл бұрын
Or there isn't a coatroom
Anna bey pleeeease can you do a full lengthy video on how as women you deal with, rude employees, rude people, poor service etc where simply ignoring cannot be done and it needs to be strictly addressed and dealt with. I think in the times we live in now people have lost all basic manners and being firm and authorative has to be done or you will be taken advantage of and receive sub par service, disrespected by strangers/workers, or your business will fail if you do not take action with employees who are not behaving appropriately, I would really appreciate your take on it, what would be the elegant way? I dont think ignoring them would teach them anything and it is not fair to yourself to be treated that way. Many thanks love your videos and personality! EDIT: I live in London in a very nice area but poor etiquette is the norm here amongst all age groups I own a few companies and run in to all sorts of people and tired of being the polite turn the other cheek person when I feel I should instead be blunt and call people out
@oddeven327
Жыл бұрын
I am not Anna but even I thought about this situation and it depends on where you are, in a developing country where everything is a matter of survival being extremely polite will get you no where, you need to be fierce inorder to survive. Whereas it's different for a developed country, where people are mature and respectful, you can get your points across without difficulty. So I believe, you need to read the room, if you can't get your point across politely, you need to be firm. And being firm is elegant but being rude isn't, and there's difference between the two. If you can't ignore things then don't ignore it just for the sake of being polite, have your points across but be firm and rational about it. Sometimes you need to scare them with your words and that happens mostly in developing countries, you have to use heavy words because its about survival and not about being elegant in developing countries.
@inezamy9523
Жыл бұрын
@@oddeven327 am sorry but l feel offended because in some of these developing countries we may be more courteous than the developed countries
@tinabean713
Жыл бұрын
@@inezamy9523 I was wondering if ODD EVEN was specifically referring to salespeople and beggars - who can be particularly difficult to deal with for us mild-mannered types? They make me have second thoughts about visiting certain areas, even though I have generally received fantastic service everywhere I've been in Latin America. Some of the worst service I have received has been in northern Europe, although I can think of a couple of comically bad experiences in the US. One time my friend who worked as a waitress wrote a 3-page letter to a restaurant to let them know just how bad the service was. I am usually hesitant to tell other people how to do their jobs (especially people in service positions), but sometimes if the person is young/inexperienced I might try to offer them some suggestions in a polite, friendly way. My bigger concern is how bad to they need to be before I let their manager know that they might be damaging the business. It could just be a bad day for that person, but it could also be a consistent pattern of behavior. I did get someone in trouble with their superior earlier this year and then I felt the need to apologize to them because that wasn't my intention. I asked them to do something, they gave me what is a typical amount of pushback and I complained that I hate this part of my job. My manager told the Senior VP (who used to be my PM), who then went and complained to his department head. I tried to tell hem that this was a fairly typical reaction - definitely not the worst that I've gotten - and that I'm not normally that emotional about it. Both managers felt that I should receive no pushback at all so he got in trouble and I felt so bad about it!
@oddeven327
Жыл бұрын
@@inezamy9523 obviously, irrespective of people being in the developing countries or development countries I have no right of saying people in one type of county is better than the other. I am here talking solely about instances where people will take your bread, instances where people will crush you over because you were polite in such I am telling to read the room and if you see it as or the situation as a threat you need to not hold back.
@oddeven327
Жыл бұрын
@@tinabean713 no, I am not referring to any type of specific people. I am talking about instances where you should think about survival instead of being polite is all.
1. They are never rude or snarky. 2. They never push the plate away from them. 3. If there is a coat room, they don’t bring their coat with them and sit it on their chair. 4. They don’t go to the bathroom before dessert, and they don’t announce it-they just say “Excuse me”. 5. They don’t speak loudly on the phone in public. 6. They don’t stare at people, they glance discreetly. 7. They don’t chew gum in public. 8. For men: Don’t show your sole to the person you’re with when you’re sitting down. 9. Don’t over-explain why you aren’t attending an event. 10. Don’t carry a large handbag when you go out at night.
I love that you use examples of how you used to behave! One of my favourite teachings from my mentor is that each "flaw" we have served a beautiful purpose at some point. Drunk Anna of the past, for example, was seeking validation because she was seeking love, and that's beautiful. God knows I've done the same in the past 😂 Owning your mistakes is so classy and confident and I love it 🙌
I thought JLaw was trying to be self-deprecating in a joking way, as if it say, “it’s a bit much to call me the hottest!” rather than being passive aggressive. (But the lesson still stands!)
@Keapix
Жыл бұрын
That’s exactly how I interpreted it.
@sa-man-tha
Жыл бұрын
She could have thanked her for the "overly generous" praise or "very flattering" comment but instead she phrased her statement in a way that come off as snarky/rude.
@MsRoadrunner42
Жыл бұрын
Me 2!
@farahjichi4617
Жыл бұрын
@@FancyForestPerson some prefer humbleness over graciousness..
@AdrianaFraga977
Жыл бұрын
No, Lawrence was rude and inelegant. And she does things very tacky just to show how “down to earth” she is.
LOVE the hair, dress, everything and thank you especially for the topic! This is so needed especially now - saving, sharing, rewatching.
The problem with living in a year-round warm climate is there are often no such thing as cloakrooms, coat checks, or even coat hooks or stands. Very maddening. Also, twice I have sent wedding gifts to friends when I could not attend. Neither time did I receive a thank-you card. Very impolite!
I agreed wholeheartedly with all that you said except one - singing in your car with all of your windows up. You can sing softly and with no crazy dance moves, you’re good. I hate it when people blast their music in the car, with windows up or down, it’s annoying and it makes you look ignorant and juvenile. It can damage your eardrums/hearings. Very good video Ms. Anna! It’s about time someone teaches the road etiquettes. Thank you!
All tips are great advice. I learned the chewing gum lesson in junior high, maybe at the age of 13 or 14. I was a flute player in orchestra, second chair, and chewing gum one day in class, which was something I did not do frequently. My orchestra instructor stopped the entire class and said to everyone that chewing gum was like a cow chewing its cud. I was mortified and promptly stalled my gum. Yikes!
@tinabean713
Жыл бұрын
I think it was against the rules at my school, but we still did it. I remember a teacher once telling us that it was "so bourgeois". I don't know why that always stuck with me. Not enough to stop it at that point, but I always made sure I didn't smack my gum. Then one day, the dentist told me what brand of gum I chewed, and I hadn't chewed it since the previous day. I have not chewed gum since.
@AmandaD33
Жыл бұрын
Do you have cavities, or have you ever had them? Cause I chew trident, I'm 30, and never had cavities. I don't chew daily anymore but I will start back up soon to add to my regular dental care routine. Gum is not ALL bad. Chew trident hahaha this is NOT sponsored.
@conclavecabal.h0rriphic
Жыл бұрын
@@AmandaD33 your dental health has way more to do with genetics and diet. If you like to chew gum, do it. You don’t have to rationalize living your life.
@cjay233
Жыл бұрын
I had a teacher tell the class the same cow chewing story. I think about it every time I chew gum. I chew it occasionally and when I'm alone.🙂
@anyaamasova6607
Жыл бұрын
@@cjay233 Yes, after that comment, when I did chew gum, it was mostly in private. Excellent point.
“If you are a curious elegant lady...” This made me laugh most un-elegantly.
@ScarletQue
Жыл бұрын
😂😂😂
#7. On my Wedding Day, i forgot i was chewing gum & just realized it on the altar when we had to say our wedding vows; i couldn't throw it away, too afraid to swallow it for fear of choking. i think i had it in my mouth even through the formal photos until we sat down to eat a very elegant dinner, simply forgetting about it all day long. My takeaway was if you are going somewhere important, use a mint so it disintegrates in your mouth. I was mortified about that gum & i still can remember that sense of panic of not being able to spit it out for fear of it sticking somewhere inappropriate.
I'm told one of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth's rules is "Never Complain, Never Explain." This is the core of her elegant behavior!
100% truth. I thank my mother for teaching me ALL of these points, I wish more people will learn then too!
I have a legitimate doubt. If there is no cloakroom in certain places, what do you do with your outwear? In Mexico we don't have the habit of cloakrooms.
I think chewing gum in public is fine unless you’re at an event or make it obvious. As far as the sweater situation goes, I have several auto immune disorders. I must have a sweater or jacket nearby at all times as my body temperature goes from hot to cold in minutes sometimes.
Thank you Anna, I just can't thank enough for your untiring efforts to elevate us!
Sending flowers is the key! Always sending flowers to my friends and loved ones, would they live in the same city or on an other continent.
Ohh my "big sister i never had" Anna!:) Looking forward to your great advices
@unamed2516
Жыл бұрын
To me she’s like both the mom and sister I never had 🙂
@drakenulla
Жыл бұрын
@@unamed2516 ❤
Yes, speaking loudly on the phone while in public places is really upsetting to me.
Dear I adore you, you know why because you are sharing your own experience and you aren't ashamed thanks so much for sharing ♡ nobody's perfect and we all learn by making mistakes
#11. Sitting on the desk while there's a chair nearby. It reminds me of a scene in "Pretty Woman" when Richard Gere reminds Julia Roberts for doing so.
@citrineforme
Жыл бұрын
🤦🏼♀️🤣
@user-ec5bp4vq7y
3 ай бұрын
Exactly! Why sit on the desk? Are there no chairs?
I agree about not wanting help to wash my dishes. I prefer to wash dishes after my guests leave. I want to take time to visit with them in the living room after dinner. Guests are guests and I want to spend our time enjoying their company in my home.
@Rosie_C
Жыл бұрын
I think it’s important to be discerning enough to tell what’s most important to the hostess. Accommodate whichever way the hostess prefers. It doesn’t bother my mother if no one helps clean up. Whereas some of my in-laws and other friends prefer to have everything cleaned up when everyone leaves and I think they feel more relaxed if the kitchen gets all cleaned up right away. I personally don’t appreciate it when people help and wash the dishes but they don’t do a good job at getting them clean.
Thanks Anna for all of these amazing videos ,they really help me to become a better version of myself just as externally and internally 💕
People watching is one of my favourite things to do. Sometimes I forget that my sun glasses are not as dark as I think they may be 😎 I'm one of the curious ladies out there, but never with my mouth open 😂
@howint1578
Жыл бұрын
I noticed that in Berlin people just stare and somehow it's okay... Soo many interesting looking people out there. Would be kind of stupid to pretend you don't notice. But that's a different culture.
@frostflower5555
2 ай бұрын
In East Europe it's quite normal to stare. Not sure about the villages in Spain or France though but probably yes. I am sure lots of people sit on their balconies to watch.
I agree with everything. Most of these we were taught by the time were 6! The next 10 years were spent re-inforcing them. Unfortunately, because differing cultures have different mores now anything goes, including manners, etiquette, dress 😕
I really appreciate your tips. So often people will do something that makes me uncomfortable or I will do something that makes people uncomfortable. Watching your videos explains those behaviors and why people sometimes cringe. I think it’s important to remember that we’re all not raised with the best manners. As for the gum chewing, some therapist recommend chewing gum to relieve stress. Going to a royal wedding is definitely stressful.
In a world where manners, standards and etiquette seem to be falling by the wayside, here comes Anna to remind us why these things are just so important. You look lovely today Anna, as always, and thanks for another great tutorial. Cheers from Canada!
Love your dress in this video! The belt is an icing on the cake 💜
I lpve you Anna,but just friendly "elegent lady not siting on tabel,just right now you recording this video!!
@Aire1168
Жыл бұрын
That was what I was thinking also.
Such small yet segnificant details. Thank you
Wow, the amount of research and thought put into this is incredible! You've tackled a complex topic in a way that's both informative and engaging. This is a valuable resource for anyone looking to become high value woman!
Wow, so many great examples - many things I would do differently. But always good to refresh what I already know and do better for what I may not know... You know what I find - elegant/classy - a simple thank you card in the mail.... Thank you for inviting me to your... Thank you for sending me... Thank you for thinking of me... It hurts my heart that people don't think to send these kind gestures, anymore..
Anna! Your blogs really changed my life. Even my perception about things changed after watching your KZread channel. Sending love and much blessings your way.❤️
I love how genuine she is. Looking awesome as usual 💜
I spent most the video curious about her sitting atop the desk/table when a chair was available (esp whilst wearing a dress or skirt.) I assumed it a hint of a forthcoming "No" but, surprised to see it was not.🤷🏼♀️
Thank you so much for sharing. I've made the mistake of talking too loudly before too and it's embarrassing to admit. It is really uncomfortable when others do it - especially on speaker phone in public like a store. It happens a lot around here. Usually they are speaking another language and they act like they think since they are not speaking English, it's private conversation but I often times pick up bits of what they are saying and it's just unbecoming. We need to be more respectful of others and careful too. Thank you so much for this reminder and for sharing your own personal experiences too. Love your hair!
She should be honored Joanna Lumley knows who she is. Lumley is a legend!
I agree with most of this video. I live in Danmark, and here it is normal to hear people saying " I'm going to the bathroom" or "I have to PEEE". This is so embarassing and I will probably never get use to it. On the other hand, my brasilian friends love to almost force entry to your kitchen. I hate that 😔
I have an issue with the hanging the coat on my chair, too. It's always in the way! However, most restaurants don't have a coat check, even the very nice ones. What do I do then?!
@ezzietrys9026
Жыл бұрын
this my question, do we just keep the coat on? Not take a coat at all. or just never visit somewhere without a cloak room
@queentinadoire6931
Жыл бұрын
I would just keep my coat on.
@ezzietrys9026
Жыл бұрын
@@queentinadoire6931 You would keep a winter coat on during a three course meal?
@queentinadoire6931
Жыл бұрын
@@ezzietrys9026 I usually do not eat at restaurants, but I would do it if I have to. I have done it one or two times during winter. I am not a big eater.
I love how you share your past mistakes. Makes me feel not so bad about my prior mistakes! Thank you, love your videos❣️❣️
Thank you for your teachings Anna, I am grateful to have access to your content to help me navigate life.
Thank you for talking about manners and etiquette. I think I lost some of this growing up and through a toxic traumatic marriage. I need to continue working on myself so I can be a better person. Your videos help me to think about self improvement. Thank you.
I love LOVE when you say “dear elegant ladies” and “dear elegant gentlemen”. These tips are next, deeper level.. thank you!!!
I loved this video. with people talking in public on the phone I agree. I also think it rude to go through a checkout on the phone, I have seen people not even acknowledge the cashier I feel that is extremely rude. 🥂
I'm definitely guilty of over explaining, thankfully I came to realize the more I explained, the more I sounded like I was making excuses. And talking about my personal life in public which happened once when I was in a taxi, and as soon as I got out and ended the call, I realized how much the driver and the other passengers now knew about my troubles 😂😂😂
@hadilayyad6147
Жыл бұрын
Oooof I’m trying so hard to change my habit of over-explaining and giving too many details instead of keeping it short and to the point when I talk 😬 I think it’s my anxiety that makes me do this
@pariagoldoozan6270
Жыл бұрын
@@hadilayyad6147 yeah, same here. I felt like I had to justify most of my decisions and things I do. But, I came to realize most people don't even care about the reasons 😂 and sometimes it can even get awkward when you over explain.
@hadilayyad6147
Жыл бұрын
@@pariagoldoozan6270 It really does get awkward and I kick myself in the ass mentally every-time I do it 🗿🗿
@pariagoldoozan6270
Жыл бұрын
@@hadilayyad6147 it does definitely get better once you start recognizing your mistakes. So don't worry about it too much, you'll get better at it little by little♥️
@hadilayyad6147
Жыл бұрын
@@pariagoldoozan6270 You’re right, thanks ❤️
Cloakroom is a great opportunity for bringing home bedbugs. I'm just saying ... same with coatracks. I won't use them since I learned this and thus often go without a coat, but not always. I make sure the coat I do bring is light if it's a formal or business event. I also do not like when people are on the phone in public ... but no one will say don't speak with a companion in public and it's hard to see a difference (indeed the full-on live conversation being twice the noise). You're right about rudeness and the point is well-taken; it is especially unbecoming on people we consider elegant. I think J Law just misspoke; she was probably trying to downplay the compliment and didn't do it gracefully but it came across as criticism. (Giving people the benefit of the doubt -- that's elegant!)
I have made many mistakes you’ve mentioned in your videos but I most definitely agree with what you said about talking on the phone loudly in public. It is something that bothers me a lot. Now that I’m raising a young lady of my own, I’ve become much more self aware because I want to raise her to be better than me in all aspects of life. Recently we discussed staring/pointing at people. Even though she was admiring someone, it’s still not appropriate because the other person might feel uncomfortable. I love your videos, Anna. My daughter is much more of a girly girl than I was at her age and some of your advice helps me guide and teach good manners. 🥰
May God bless your hustle. Wish you well in your journey of becoming one of the celebrated KZreadRS in your country and beyond. Keep it up. ❤️
Dear Anna, I am so thankful for a your tips! Would you tell us please what to do with your coat if there was not an option to have it put in a coat room? In the U.S. it's not an option as often and of course I would love to stay as elegant as possible! Thanks!
@trishna_6815
Жыл бұрын
yes, I would like to know this as well. should we put it across our lap maybe?
I hate hate HATE people talking loudly on the phone in public, oh my gosh, it is terrible 🤦🏻♀️
Excellent advice on each item. I promise to stop trying to help with dishes in someone else's kitchen when they say no and no pushing my plate to the side when I finish at the table. Bless you.
Love the new? Hair colour, very flattering 🥰
Anna can you address the issue of leaving food on your plate? This is considered bad form in many parts of Europe and I find it personally annoying when I have to throw away half a plate of food from a guest.
Not many restaurants have cloakrooms so coats have to be perched at the back of chairs
I love your elegance videos and I admit, I have my moments where I can be elegant but I’m embarrassed to admit there’s many things you mention here that prove how inelegant I am! I’ve always felt myself approachable and that people are comfortable around me because I’m not to uptight, and often people find me funny because some of the things I say, they aren’t expecting, but I’m realizing some of the things I do that can actually make others uncomfortable. I’m going to work on it.
You’re so entertaining and funny as always. I like that you criticized snarkiness and passive aggression.
Wow anna you impress me every time!! Your hair color looks amazing on you❤️
Your hair looks amazing! The color, length and overall structure suits you incredibly ❤
Thank you for raising this. I don’t drive, and I ALWAYS get to hear every single word people are saying on the phone inside their cars. It’s SO FUNNY 😆😆 I swear no one knows about this! Funny story- one time I was on a date and the guy went to the bathroom for a long time. I thought he had run away! But he returned with tissue to his nose, he was SO NERVOUS that he had a NOSE BLEED on our date! Quite sweet really 😄😄
My mother would love you, you inspire a kind of polite and decent society. Frankly i consider myself pretty elegant and know most of these rules, but honestly from experience the most elegant women are actually the MOST not elegant behind closed doors. It's that they recognize this in themselves and prefer to present the non barbaric side in public. For myself i know i am actually quite a rock dressed as a pearl to others, it makes life fun and enjoyable.
@pinkpanda5696
Жыл бұрын
Anna has actually done a video on elegance in the bedroom.
@semekiizuio
Жыл бұрын
Nah elegance is a status money symbol but that has nothing to do with the person themselves. People think dressing good (because money) automatically makes them elegant classy etc.
@sew_gal7340
Жыл бұрын
@@semekiizuio you don't know elegance then. Princess Diana would be elegant with our without the riches. Elegance is a mindset, it doesn't matter if you are rich or not, I know plenty of people who are extremely classy and they are middle class at most
@semekiizuio
Жыл бұрын
@@sew_gal7340 this isnt about me. I'm talking about the general populace think rich equate to elegance
Anna, you just look stunning in your new hair style 😍
Love your advice, So much common sense. for example. We tell our kids to wash up before a meal simply so they don't bring mess to the table whether it's in private or public Then Pray because we are at God's table. Growing up i would ask to be excused from the table when at my Grandparents.
I once had sent a decline to an rsvp. The host and I are merely acquaintances, she called me and wanted an explanation as to why I had declined. At first, I thought she had not received the rsvp. I chew gum often but am very careful to park it or even remove it during meals, and socializing. it helps prevent sinus headaches. We can all learn more. Pairing our vehicles to our phones can also cause problems.