You Can’t Shame A Gay Boy Straight | Gareth Patterson | TEDxStormontStudio
Can our sexual identity be altered through psycho-therapeutic interventions, or even prayer? And what would drive someone to want to change this deeply personal and very natural side of them? In some parts of the world it is still legal to offer specialist therapy in an attempt to re-orientate someone’s same-sex attraction. General Practitioner Dr Gareth Patterson shares his own personal story of growing up gay within an evangelical Christian community, the shame he experienced, and the circumstances that led him into Conversion Therapy (and out the other side). #NoMoreShame Gareth is a qualified medical doctor and member of the Royal College of General Practitioners. In 2019 he took up a GP Partnership post in East Belfast. Outside of his clinical job, Gareth is a proud advocate for the city he lives in and the country he loves. In 2017 he launched his own business, NI Coffee Maps, producing a series of pocket guides promoting the best local independent specialty coffee shops in Northern Ireland which is the first of its kind in the UK and Ireland. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
Пікірлер: 122
It breaks my heart that this is even an issue for our youth. I am 58 years old and I listen to this man like it was back in the 1980’s with all the hate and prejudice that I grew up with. These so called “fake Christians” have no idea how much pain they have inflicted on our children because of their backward and uneducated views. I am so happy to see that you are moving forward with your life with no more shame and fear and challenging those around you.
@bherrin67
6 ай бұрын
Same 🤚🏻💔
@AndrewtateIsinjail
5 ай бұрын
Thank you queen or king for supporting 🏳️🌈 🏳️⚧️
The world needs YOUR memoir. If you wrote this script yourself, your talent is IMMENSE, and your story can help millions. Thank you so much for telling your story ❤
At 63 I'm only just Starting the process of accepting that my evangelical Christian upbringing led me to shut down and hide from myself and be overcome by the shame that haunted me all my life.. No more shame is my goal. Thank you so much for sharing xx
At age 77, I still have the struggle I had at age 7.
@steelcrown7130
7 ай бұрын
That is appalling. I was also 7, but it was 1967, so I am a little younger than you. I hope the struggle passes, and peace takes its place. It did eventually with me.
@auguststudio2707
6 ай бұрын
Hmm, I'd love to hear all about your journey.
@auguststudio2707
6 ай бұрын
Hmm, I'd love to hear all about your journey.
@Ravisingh-hm2kx
4 ай бұрын
Why God has made us ,better I would have died in my young only 😭😭😭😭.
@rahil5989
Ай бұрын
@@Ravisingh-hm2kxwe can connect, I am from india.
Hope he has a life filled with happiness and finds the love of his life!
What a beautiful man.
i prayed to god to be changed, too. in the 70ties. The brilliance of Gareth's talk is, that he shares how deeply hurtfull and painfull this feeling of shame is, which was imposed to us. But that alone can be re-traumatizing to hear, depressing. Instead, he shows how far he got in transforming the impact of the unhealthy power structures over him, and to reconstruct a healthy self. He speaks so breautifully, his voice sounds form the depth of his heart and soul. Thank you so much, Gareth.
Spot on, 100%! Living openly and authentically will not waste so much human potential that we really need in our world.
Beautifully and articulately spoken. Thank you.
Brilliant young man! Love is always the best answer.
Beautifully chosen words expressing a profound message in just about the most beautiful spoken English I’ve ever heard.
Similar to my own teen years. This breaks my heart. I hate that children still have to live in silent fear, shame. 😢
Very powerful and uplifting. I'm so pleased you found your path Gareth.
God made you just the way you are. There is no shame in that remember this life in not a choice. Your perfect go live your life and be happy. ❤
@LemarSipes
6 ай бұрын
This is true. God mage me a pyrimaniac, I love to burn things down. I was born this way, always loved matches as a kid then explosives. I go to church and feel no guilt, I didn't choose to be this way
@ludovicleprinceroyal8721
5 ай бұрын
@@LemarSipes proud of you....as long as you're not Irish
God loves you and does NOT judge you. We are our own worst enemies. God accepts and loves you exactly as you arenas beyond your wildest dreams. People judge not God
Thank you for sharing your story. As someone who has had a similar experience this speaks to me.
Incredibly powerful and impactful. Thanks for sharing. No more shame!
Illuminating, Intelligent and moving. Gareth, you’re exceptional
No, you can't, nor should you. I would accept my child and love him or her.
Very well said. A great story. The shame you feel is the direct result of religion. Religion poisons everything. Coming out is hard enough, but adding religious shame to it makes it all the more difficult. I hope you can continue down the path you are on, with or without religion. Btw, I'm an MD from the US.
@LemarSipes
6 ай бұрын
Well one of the worst religions of the world is Humanism of which you embrace. Human nature is the most vile since it is separation & rebellion from the Creator. It is just as bad as those who believe they are religious yet live as humanists
@garymagruder7154
6 ай бұрын
My male partner (husband) now in the U.S. have been faithfully together for sixty years . We are now in our eighties. Together forever, EDLOVESGARY
@Pk-wu9tl
2 ай бұрын
@@garymagruder7154we need people like this ❤
i really like the musicality of his voice
Thank you Gareth, for your story, for the pain you experienced growing up. In my case, it was easier to remove myself from the situation (I.e. the church and sadly family as well). As you eloquently state we lived with shame. I will never lose sight of your closing words about self-love, don’t let anyone put you down so one day this shame we endured and unfortunately has left us damaged will be no more and living is living regardless of who you love. Thank you!!!🤗
People don’t understand it’s not a choice. Just like it’s not a choice to be straight. Someday maybe this won’t be an issue.
Thank you for sharing your experiences, Gareth. I hope you are finding happiness on your own terms.
My exact thought after finishing this: "That was beautiful. Thank you ❤" I couldn't say more. Just so beautiful. Thank you ❤
I'm sorry you had this path to travel. I hope you are doing well today. God loves you. Exudes international hurt too many. Hugs to you.
Well done Gareth ! You spoke the truth from your "Heart" ❤ not the interlect from the head ! Thank you for sharing this with world ,I can only imagine the massive amount of people that you have helped by telling this spiritual truth. 🙂👏
What a Wonderfully spoken understanding of his life condition. He speaks poetry.
Thank you for the beautiful message and story ❤️
Thank you for telling your story, it could easily have been me talking for the most part. It is a more universal story than what society would like to believe or admit.
This is so beautiful and illuminating ❤️
Indeed beautiful spoken...NO more shame....you of all people should be Happy....because you struggled far to long....I hope you will find Your Man as soon as possible....Let your SOULS be Free FINALLY....And DON,T let anyone Hurt your PRECIOUS SOUL AGAIN.....EVER....❤❤❤
Proud of you for this, Gareth
The word "Homosexuality" was NOT in the Bible until 1946. It was an "Editorial Decision". Consider the hatred that that "Editorial Decision" has fed and the lives destroyed. The Bible is NOT inerrant, but a highly edited and modified collection of books (some discarded from the collection when they didn't fit the chosen narrative) and stories from "pre-history". "Pre-history" is a period prior to written history. How have those "Pre-history" stories changed when only communicated verbally? Consider the familiar parlor game of "Chain of Whispers". Take ten people and begin with a whisper in one ear to be shared with the next and the next. After only 10 whispers, the message is entirely different. Now take that chain of whispers and multiply its repetition over years and generations. Hate is a terrible thing and hurts millions of people, yet there is nothing more satisfying to the righteous than to Hate in the name of God.
@jakejackson8238
6 ай бұрын
They so enjoy putting on that ghastly, fools-no one grin as they express their “love and concern “.
Wow! Incredibly powerful. Relatable. Thank you for sharing. Very appreciated.
Thank you! ♥May we all live in love ♥
What a brave beautiful strong MAN you are! Best wishes for a joyful life and t freedom from shame that is yours to enjoy who you were created by God to be! Much love to you my Brother 🌈👍🙋♂️⭐️💪🏳️🌈💜🇺🇸✝️❤️
Thank you so much for sharing that! As a side note, I have always loved the Irish accent and I could listen to you talk all day!
Thank you for your beautiful testimony. I hope you will share again.
Gareth, your story is powerful and impactful. My nephew came out 15 years ago, and he had the same struggles with his church and Christianity. Thank you for sharing and will be sharing this with my wonderful nephew!
You seem like such a good dude, wish you were my friend. Cheers from the Us, Oklahoma City to be exact. Hof bless you for your courage man. Seem like a wonderful dude.👍❤️
@johnpresley4108
8 ай бұрын
God bless, can't type!:)
Love Yourself. That says it all. Just love yourself.
Awesome talk man!
Love you so much man, my lifes been a lot like that mate, thank you for your story/sharing
Accepting ourselves is the best way to live fulfulling life!❤ I hope your message reaches to every person out there 🙏
Intense, with a very inspiring and uplifting conclusion.
People NEED TO REALIZE that NOT ALL PRIZES WON are MADE OF GOLD ( etc ) !
You are so well spoken, your talents lie in teaching/writing/acting and YES loving someone special. It all gets better - much better just you wait in see.
Thank you so much for your words. I am grateful for them and I know they will help many (including those of us who have already gone through what you have)
BEAUTIFUL!!! 🙏🏾👏🏾
Thank you for shining light & hope
Thank you so much for sharing your story and powerful message. I also grew up in a N Irish evangelical church and could identify with everything you said. Thankfully, I eventually saw the light and freed myself of the shackles of their loveless dogma and judgement. Keep living in the light Gareth, the light that is you and your kindness to yourself and to those around you.
You are an incredibly gifted human being
Just fantastic. I’m in awe of you. ❤
I love and respect you, my friend ❤
resonated so deeply to his story
That someone should go through this journey of shame is the real son. I was raised Roman Catholic and as soon as as I was 18 and went off to college I turned by back on all the nonsense of the church and all religions, as they are all cults. You can be an evolved human without all their manipulative nonsense.
Gorgeous man. So brave too
Find your own God and find your true SELF....You will be happy at the end, trust me. BRAVO PRESENTATION.
Very well said ❤
A breathtaking presentation. You are amazing. You would be a perfect partner for some lucky guy. Dave
This man is amazing ❤😊😊😊❤
bless your heart
I like this handsome cute boy, and I hope I have a boyfriend like him❤
Thank you!
Bravo
God bless you man ❤
Learn to meditate and you will discover you stop seeking love and approval from the outside. Love yourself first to set the example. Shame is self-generated.
This!! ❤❤❤
By the teachings of your own faith, you are exactly as god wished you to be.
Well done you.
I applaud your courage , sympathise with your trauma & congratulate you for being true to yourself. If you were born in Southern Ireland , you will be Catholic. If you were born in Thailand you most probably be Buddhist. I don't believe that you have to be baptised a Christian to go to Heaven. Pope Francisdeclared recently" Homosexuality is NOT a crime". If you were born in Uganda or Zimbabwe, you will be jailed or killed. God loves me & you too !
None of us chose it!
Fantastico ❤❤❤❤❤❤
🙏
💙
The idea is to get you to get rid of yourself so straight alpha chad had more room. Get to getting.
I love the Scottish accent, as an American. Such a beautiful voice.
@edheal3246
2 жыл бұрын
It is an Irish accent BTW
@PS-ru2ov
2 жыл бұрын
@@edheal3246 its Northern Irish
@harrycoplin8414
2 жыл бұрын
PLSSSSSS😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
@wardenblack9734
Жыл бұрын
He is not Scottish! He tells us that he comes from Northern Ireland.
@robertcaley2671
Жыл бұрын
The accent is Northern Irish, actually
You are so nice man so beautiful ❤❤❤ Un hombre hermoso 😍😍💖
❤❤
First off, you must know that in your faith belief, that God is the creator of life. He created you the way you are. And God is described as perfection. Therefore, the way you are is perfection. Believe in your purity and authentic self and embrace those ideals. Love is love and whom you love is ideal.
Is he still single?
❤🧡💛💚💙💜
Thank you for sharing your very poignant story.
ನನ್ನಿಗಳು ಕರ್ನಾಟಕ ದಿಂದ
@markreid9499
2 жыл бұрын
Awesome. So uplifting
@markreid9499
2 жыл бұрын
Awesome...so uplifting
@coolfix948
Жыл бұрын
@Alexander thanks , from Karnataka
You have a beautiful story. I hope you are happy and loved.