Friendly reminder that constantly stimulating your brain with your phone while lying in bed DOESN'T equal resting. I dare say that the current burnout pandemic comes partly from everyone's brains being overworked and overfed to the point of constant information fatigue. Have a nice holiday everyone and let both your mind and body rest ❤️

@davemccage7918

7 ай бұрын

How dare you write “p@$demic” without putting a trigger warning first! I’m so traumatized that I have no choice but to unleash my bi-polar. So insensitive!

@Myke_thehuman

7 ай бұрын

​@@davemccage7918weird joke but you do you.

@malachistice8111

7 ай бұрын

​@@Myke_thehumanmust be an old person

@VixeyTeh

7 ай бұрын

Hi, I have 3 university degrees. It is not possible to overcook your brain. It's like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it gets.

@lippi2171

7 ай бұрын

@@VixeyTeh but imagine that you're training your muscles 7 days a week. With no time to regenerate, the muscles start to suffer damage. It's called overtraining. In case of the mind, information fatigue / overload is a real thing: "empirical evidence shows that information overload is positively related to strain, burnout and various health complaints" *M. Arnold (2023), Dealing with information overload: a comprehensive review

"Failure is an event, never a person. Sometimes we win, sometimes we learn."

@nkopanelesedilebona9227

4 ай бұрын

Thank you for the reminder. I hope you have a pleasant day and that someone gives you a hug. ^ ^

@PifchoBG

25 күн бұрын

i had a few failures where i don't feel like i learned anything, going back a few times i tried and tried to learn something but it always seemed like there was nothing to learn and the fact that i didn't learn anything makes me feel that type of failures are the worst.

@ThePhaaze

24 күн бұрын

@@PifchoBG You learned that there was nothing to learn, and this might be te turning point to try something else at one point or another. You are always a little bit smarter after a failure, no matter how you look at it.

I wanted to be more social a couple of month ago. I started to go to a shop once a week. Then walk around that mall once a week. Then go read at a café once a week and change café every week. Every step of the way, my mind was fighting me, telling me that things will go wrong. Now, a couple of week later, it's the things that I'm looking forward in my week. Can't wait to see the next step. Thanks for the video.

@S3verance

7 ай бұрын

Keep it up!

@jackpott1322

7 ай бұрын

yup taking small steps is the powerful way

@AtomicBl453

7 ай бұрын

Kinda sounds like we're on the same path. How's it working out for you, are you striking up conversation with strangers and making new friends in the process? I've recently started traveling to different museums throughout the surrounding states each weekend, it's pretty fun, kinda expensive though.

@compugab

7 ай бұрын

@@AtomicBl453 Funny enough I did not make any friends by doing this kind of stuff but by talking about what I'm doing to a coworker of mine I rarely talked to before. Now we talk almost everyday and she wants to set me up with one of her friends 😊

@Anna-yl2lp

7 ай бұрын

​@@compugabthis is interesting to me, because noticing how even when things work out they don't happen in the way the brain predicted it, makes ignoring the brain's attempts to deter me from trying new stuff a lot easier. 99% of the stuff it told me would or wouldn't happen didn't came true, and the little bastard doesn't want me to realize it's full of crap 😂

I got sick recently so I took time off work. I had already planned to use such an opportunity to do just that - nothing. For one whole day, from the moment I woke up to the moment I went to sleep I either sat or walked around my home (to get some blood circulation), ate premade meals, and used the restroom. I aimed to resist anything that would try to grab my attention, like phone, an object, a thought. Let me tell you... for the first half of the day I felt like I was on an emotional rollercoaster. I felt physically uncomfortable and making all kinds of excuses to do _something_, anything that will distract me from the thoughts and feelings I'm experiencing. "I'm wasting time.", "Why am I doing this? This is stupid.", "This needs cleaning.", "I'm curious to look there.", "Maybe I can just watch a movie later.", "I just wanna quickly look at phone before bed.", and various self-deprecating thoughts. There were so many moments where I directly identified with those thoughts and started walking to, say to clean something, but on the way I'd realize it was just a thought and I don't need to clean it now. The mild fever added some extra exhaustion to all of it as well. When I'd have a bad thought, I'd reframe it towards something realistic with encouragement and feeling grateful for what I already have. Now, as the day went on, the discomfort started to decrease and the thoughts felt less like me and more like just thoughts. Thoughts and emotions, they were unreliable. They just came and went, came again and went again, came again and went again. I calmed down and started to kind of enjoy the process of seeing a thought or desire come over me like "I should look at the phone.", immediately recognize it and know it'll disappear in a few seconds. By the end I felt more in the world than in my head, like I can pick what I actually want to do and not be pushed around by the wind of thoughts and feelings. This was about 3 weeks ago and I've been experiencing great peace and emotional stability since. I'm in a much more calm and positive mindset and I'm able to recognize the feeling of an oncoming self-deprecating thought before I even know what it will be. When that happens, I immediately reframe out loud or in my mind by saying something like "No no, we do not talk to ourselves that way anymore. No, _[acknowledge the part of the thought that is untrue]_. It is true that _[acknowledge the part of it that is true]_, but _[point out progress made so far, that it may be unrealistic to think it can be solved in a single step, *and give yourself encouragement and other nice words*]_. _[If applicable, point out why it's unrealistic to worry about this right now because maybe you're about to go to bed or work where you can't prioritize solving it anyway.]_". This was my experience. I would recommend doing this. It is 1 day, a sacrifice of about 16 waking hours. If it doesn't work, then at least you tried something new. Either way, if you do it I would really be interested in reading about your experience.

@Monkewarrior6868

7 ай бұрын

I havent tried it yet, but if anybody does i want to see what they share

@thecoolassnose

7 ай бұрын

Remind me to do this

@tyler_7977

7 ай бұрын

Called a dopamine detox, look up people's stories on KZread

@xffeeo

7 ай бұрын

Me too

@stevecarter8810

7 ай бұрын

Hey ​@@thecoolassnose, don't forget to do this

My notes: When problems occur 1. Do anything that you can to solve the problem instead of changing the emotion 2.Write down the thoughts that I have of the situation and then write the thoughts the best version of me or some some inspiring figure would have. 3. Circle one of the new thoughts the you feel like you could get behind

@melikmourali2072

7 ай бұрын

From what I understood, doing 2 and 3 leads you to 1, no ?

@slamkam07

7 ай бұрын

My problem comes from the fact that I would have no idea what a better person than me would be thinking about it due to the fact that if I knew those things, I wouldn't be where I'm at in the first place.

@lucid1688

7 ай бұрын

​@@slamkam07well atleast give it a shot, maybe youll get better at it

@dioblo78

7 ай бұрын

​@@slamkam07 There was a recent video Dr K released where he stated prior to Healthy Gamer he wrote a 160 page book on video game addiction that was utter garbage. Even though it was garbage, it organized and clarified his mind on the topics he would go on to discuss with us. So it's ok if you're unsure what a better you would think or say at first, you're lvl 5 at this activity. As you keep doing it, you'll level up and be able to do it better.

@easymukbang3835

7 ай бұрын

i still don't get it... where is the tutorial for doing nothing? 😂

This lesson also speaks volumes to "perfectionist's mindsets", whenever you try to have a second to relax or chill, and recoup some energy for the upcoming work - a little anxious thought pops into your head "oh, look you are WASTING your time, that means you WON'T be able to do this work AT ALL". I used to think that "master is the person who never makes mistakes". But apparently to become "masterful at something" all you need to do is to just perform "n" mistakes, and "n+1" recoveries from the mistakes.

@BurnoutChronicles

7 ай бұрын

Well said!

@dokkaebi757

5 ай бұрын

you are describing me to a T.

@h0ph1p13

4 ай бұрын

about "master is someone who never makes mistakes". I replace that with "Even the monkey falls from the tree sometimes" (that doesn't make it less masterful or not-a-monkey :)

@h0ph1p13

4 ай бұрын

also "to make errors is human"

@jimenaloyola1709

3 ай бұрын

being a perfectionist is a blessing and a curse, i felt this

I spent 3 months in treatment centers this year for alcoholism and trauma recovery. One of the biggest things taught by all 3 treatment settings I attended was cognitive reframing. It literally helped me start to turn my life around. Now I’ve been home for 3 months and already started slipping back into an unhealthy state of mind. This video was a great reminder. Thanks Dr K!

@granDoktor

7 ай бұрын

Please don't slip into your old ways, I'm rooting for you :)

@Jiawii

7 ай бұрын

Como bro, you can get through this, you are bigger than thise setbacks!

@iche9373

7 ай бұрын

Use Ozempic to cure your alcoholism. It’s not a tip, it’s a prescription.

@tonygluk1

7 ай бұрын

You can do it bro

@jakemikrut1606

7 ай бұрын

Recovery is always a series of progress and setbacks. I love you brother. Please make it, for us, for yourself, and everyone in your life who cares about you!! And also as a giant fuck you to anyone who doubted you!

This is literally free therapy

@prismatic1239

2 ай бұрын

It’s fuckin dope

@CutTheKam

Ай бұрын

fr

@Tman328

Ай бұрын

I love his content and this video in particular I found quite helpful. But let's not confuse this with actual therapy.

You may not realize it but you have gotten so many people through so much just by proxy of your being here helping others with intent. Myself for example, 11 deaths in fewer than 10 years between all- Including every aunt and uncle, my dad and my brother at only 44 years of age. It's even more difficult being in a position of weakness being a physically strong, well educated person and sometimes just hearing your voice helping others helps me and likely others so much. Thank you, friend and to all others please reach out and say hi!

@deth3234

7 ай бұрын

Hang in there, brother. You're still here for a reason. Much love.

@Watson-create

7 ай бұрын

Idk if other people have noticed it but I've noticed that people tend to copy the way their fav youtuber talks in the comments underneath

@leonardodavinci4259

7 ай бұрын

11 deaths, that's brutal. I'm glad you could find some strength through this community. HG completely changed my life. Who would have thought that just watching videos could translate to that much improvement in well-being!

I needed that topic. It's hard to find meaningful advice on the web nowadays, when 95% of advice is either "sacrifice your life for other people" or "nothing matters, do drugs"

@VxDxLx

7 ай бұрын

Literally learn how your body responds to stimulus, tell it to do a very very boring but engaging or relaxing task for like as long as it’s ok

@VxDxLx

7 ай бұрын

After you’ve done that for like 2 months decide how to explore that exact mental practice in general at anything

@VxDxLx

7 ай бұрын

Then have fun goober life’s fun enjoy it 🫨🥺😇

@acegikm

7 ай бұрын

Yikes I haven't heard advice like that much. Sad that people are advising others that way.

@youknowjuno145541

7 ай бұрын

Lmao my TikTok feed

I've been struggling with this forever. Constantly, I feel the need to catch up with my peers, and even though I know how important it is to rest, I have to try my best just to do so. Thank you for the video, Dr. K. Your help with mental health over the years has been invaluable.

@VxDxLx

7 ай бұрын

Yee takes years

@thekingoffailure9967

7 ай бұрын

They are simply built different

@VxDxLx

7 ай бұрын

@@thekingoffailure9967 indeed

@luipaardprint

7 ай бұрын

There’s no such thing as catching up to your peers, it’s not a contest, and what is it that you would measure it by anyway? You’re not the same person.

@freddiewilliams3589

2 ай бұрын

@@luipaardprint "Catching up" definitely exists though, but its dependent on what an individual is lacking. You may have less experiance, social skills, useable knowledge etc than the majority of your peers posess, and are therefore behind in some aspect. Competition is also definitely a thing, as other people will likely want the same job, partner, prestige etc. And deficiencies that you have may make you less likely to succeed and be outcompeted by others who aren't behind in that aspect.

For me, studying engineering with adhd, doing "nothing" is the most difficult and most crucial thing to re-learn. I can only start to study when my dopamine level goes down. So I need to do "nothing" and then I can start being productive. Not easy with noises everywhere (neighbours, road, radiators, birds, insects flying against my window) and being extremely stressed out 24/7. I've got 3 different ANC headphones since they all start to hurt or cause skin irritations after some time. All I want is to have a switch in my ears to stop sending signals to my brain.

@Habixus

7 ай бұрын

On a more positive note and after watching the video to the end: getting the diagnosis,after 10 years of struggling and having no idea why, gave me the change of perspective and enabled me to re-frame everything. It's getting better, but it's difficult to push out of a burn-out, when you can't lower the amount of stuff to do.

@gregperez-greene7408

7 ай бұрын

They have around the neck earbuds which you could wear over a shirt

@aoidev3809

7 ай бұрын

I get distracted by the noise easily. I call my state "autsim", but actually, I may just have good hearing. Try wearing earplugs! And... Why would you even listen to music while studying? When I was hardcore playing ranked, I wouldn't have any music on the background because I was consumed by the game, so I may assume you are not that interested in studying. So, I don't know... Also, try library- this sh*t is insane I'm just projecting my problems on you, so be aware that it may not be the case

@iche9373

7 ай бұрын

Do a keto diet to deal with your adhd

@Habixus

7 ай бұрын

@@gregperez-greene7408 Thanks for the idea! :) Sadly they are either without active noise cancelling or they are in-ears. For in-ears, I just got the Sony WF XM5, which are awesome, but I can't have my ears plugged multiple hours per day since I already sleep with earplugs too.

Idk how many women (I’m 30) watch your videos, but I really appreciate how logical you are. These topics are really helpful.

@hanamccarthy710

7 ай бұрын

I agree I'm also a 30 year old woman. I like how specific and detailed these videos are.

@gokulv1721

7 ай бұрын

This video is for general public not specificaly women

@ItsYaBoi-ATA

7 ай бұрын

I feel like most of the women in my life could benefit in some way from his videos but I'm hesitant to suggest random dudes on the internet lmao

@PorkBoy69

7 ай бұрын

How is being a woman related to how logical the videos are.

@saratexas5181

7 ай бұрын

@@PorkBoy69 It’s not, he discusses a lot of male issues, hence my comment.

As a mental health provider myself, and huge proponent of modalities such as CBT, BA, and mindfulness, I’ve found your videos to incredibly helpful both for my own wellbeing as well as helpful for articulating and explaining the mechanisms of these techniques to the patients I work with. Thank you, Dr. K for all the incredible content you’ve been putting out. Keep up the great work!

@VxDxLx

7 ай бұрын

Big ups to the main mans

@leniwiec2401

7 ай бұрын

Do you have any advice what to do if cognitive reframing doesn't work. I keep writing my thoughts and their alternative. I'm catching the thought in the moment and trying to reframe the situation. The problem is that I don't believe the reframing part at all. I feel like I'm only gaslighting myself and I only get angry and frustrated. That's why I dumped CBT after a few years, it only made things worse.

@MythosMen

7 ай бұрын

​@@leniwiec2401I'm no psychologist or anything, but I feel the thought reframing doesn't work very well for you because of a negative core belief since thats where the negative thought would come from and it might help to pin down that core belief and writing down some objective reasons against it then reading and reminding yourself everyday. At least that's something I'd try in that case.

@leniwiec2401

7 ай бұрын

@@MythosMen I tried that with my therapist too and my brain just doesn't click. She says it might be due to trauma and I'm doing EMDR now but still... it's helps much more that CBT but I only went form 1/10 to maybe 4/10 in 2 years and I'm completely unable to feel joy, life is terrible...

Sure we need a deep dive on cognitive reframing, it’ll be really helpful.

@okabeokuyasu2505

7 ай бұрын

One of the best yet simple thing to do is writing down a dialogue between your weakest part, your fearful part, laziest you name it VS a sort of chad big bro part who is really down to earth and optimistic as if you were recomforting a friend. It's a way to answer back your thoughts. And i doesn't take more to see some efficacy, a notebook a pen and your dark thoughts and beliefs to put in a the coliseum. Give it a shot for 20,30 min it's litteraly a workout of optimistic cognitive reframing

@TheDogSamurai

7 ай бұрын

Second that.

@saifdes

7 ай бұрын

@@okabeokuyasu2505 Thank you for the suggestion!

@TheFelineEffect

7 ай бұрын

Talking with a friend/relative, about wanting to change your perspective helped me. It usually helps when they are wiser than you

I’m already a master at that

@Utilitarianrpe

8 ай бұрын

Scrolling through tiktok while procrastinating doesn't count . You actually have to enjoy the peace and bliss of your surroundings

@iiCounted-op5jx

8 ай бұрын

same

@elgato1311

8 ай бұрын

I feel as if we, as a generation feel so inclined to doing nothing due to how behind we feel. Economically and emotionally.

@iiCounted-op5jx

8 ай бұрын

@@Utilitarianrpe oh shoot

@riker8214

8 ай бұрын

@@elgato1311 which generation is that?

When I was in therapy my therapist taught me how to do the same thing without me knowing. He told me to try imagining what people I look up to would do if they were in my shoes, and to try understanding why I'm upset to try reframing it in a way that makes me feel good or positive. So if I got sad because I made my partner upset, I can accept that I'm sad that I did something stupid but say to myself that at least I know why she got upset at me and know how to make sure they don't feel that way again. Cause even if I feel like a horrible person now, I know that at the end of the day I still care for them and want the best for them. It became a really powerful coping technique that I still use today. And although I only really use it when I get extremely disturbed, this video helps me understand why it's such a good technique and how I can keep using it for moments when I'm facing any problem; not just the ones that make me feel extrememly emotional.

Nice. You got me worried for a moment at the beginning, but then I understood that that's not the way I cope. I don't run from emotions. I take time to process them lol. And then you got to the last one and yup, that's my usual go to. And I've recently been complimented for it by a fairly stunned person who learned a bit about my circumstances and said they never met someone like me. And I answered that they're right. Usually stories like mine tend to have really awful outcomes. Like ... my situation has been quite a struggle and I'm working with almost nothing, externally. But I'm so resourceful internally, that I'm still around and manage to thrive some, even. I'm oddly more content than most ppl around me, it seems, too. I had a serious surgery complication and just went "meh". Not as in "meh" = let's suppress this and pretend it's not there but rather "meh" = not unexpected for me and my funny body. It's not like i have energy to waste on being upset. I have a caring, concerned and very apologetic doctor on my team. What else would I need! We'll just take a step at a time and see then. And hey, even if the pain stays, it's less pain than I was in before, not to mention it's waaaaay more responsive to interventions!!! I'm recovering. The process is slow. I have the privilege to snail along, without starving. If I wasn't or won't be any more at some point: So what. I cared for myself the best I could and got as much help as I could bare to try access. When I'm done, I can pat my own head for not letting go of my very own hand, no matter how hard things got.

@NK-kr5mr

5 ай бұрын

"for not letting go of my very own hand" that was beautiful actually?!

@netviz8673

Ай бұрын

you are such a beautiful soul

I noticed exactly this when i committed to working out. I didnt miss a single day for months. I swore I wouldn't. The more consistent i became the more i noticed my mind making excuses. The more consistent i became, the more it reinfoced my resilience and allowed me to ignore and reframe negative thoughts. It allowed me to push through on bad days because i knew i was lying to myself and still had more in the tank. No excuses. Just do it.

After so many videos, Dr. K can still find interesting topics to talk about... out of nothing. I'll see myself out.

@Thais1985

7 ай бұрын

I laughed! Thank you, merry Christmas!

@narcsisus

7 ай бұрын

i giggled and i did a little hop around my room thank you for this piece of joy

@narcsisus

7 ай бұрын

@@gg-kr8ws i have autism

@ozkavoshdjalla

7 ай бұрын

​@@narcsisusI fact checked it and it's true

Society has sort of blackholed at this time period, where all directions lead to the center, all attempts to make it better end up making it worse Thank god for your channel. Your perspective is so fresh and unique and clear

@jackpott1322

7 ай бұрын

it's chasing a buck. it degenerates society

@Vanity0666

7 ай бұрын

I have yet to notice any attempt at making anything better at the societal scale from the people who are responsible for making changes to the social fabric, instead opting for a surge in consumerism as identity being pushed by corporate entities who have partnered with government entities to become one overarching authority over social life.

@Earthtime3978

4 ай бұрын

@@Vanity0666oh I see attempts but right now wickedness prevents change

Ive actually felt so overwhelmed lately that disengaging from everything and letting my mind wander has been healing

@thegreatgoddess9149

7 ай бұрын

Same

dude, Doctor K is probably one of the most based people on earth. Every time I see one of his uploads there is ALWAYS something that has a direct transfer in something that's currently going on in my life. It's almost scary now that I think about it.

I never want to give up but sometimes when something can get too hard, I'll give up subconsciously and end up avoiding it no matter how hard I mental push myself. Not giving up is one thing but it's difficult when your Brain does it for you.

@banglittlechan

7 ай бұрын

But don’t you subconsciously go back to trying after some time? Because that’s what I used to do and made me realize that I actually never give up, I just have a longer set back before I come back to trying again. You may think that that’s mediocrity, but it’s actually the mindset that made me give up less and less with time. I don’t know if it’s the same for you, but even if it’s not I still hope my comment can help you a little bit. You can do it! 💝

@Jamesandvideos

7 ай бұрын

@banglittlechan With some things, yeah, but it feels like the setbacks get longer and longer until I realise that I'm making so little progress on anything that I'm not actually accumulating anything. It feels like being hard stuck in a ranked competitive game where you have moments where you win a ton of games and make some progress but then it eventually evens out and you go back down only to realise that on average you never made any progress. Some things I just have so much fear that I can't carry out the decision that I have logically made in my head because everytime that I did try something to progress, it just reinforced the idea that I shouldn't have done if it turned out ok, the anxiety lingers afterward instead of feeling relief. Sometimes, the struggle in my head is more of a challenge than the actual thing I do's value of actually doing it, and then that just feels unsatisfactory

@banglittlechan

7 ай бұрын

@@Jamesandvideos Maybe the problem is not that you’re not making any progress, but that you have stuff that’s keeping you from making any progress every time you try. Instead of trying to swim the wrong direction, you can analyze what’s going on inside your mind and body everytime you want to do something and try to figure out why that happens (if you feel like you can handle it, if not then it’s fine just knowing the problem without it’s root). What you do doesn’t really matter at that point, just get to know fully what your limiting beliefs and coping mechanisms are, so you can find new helpful beliefs and coping skills to help you navigate your life better. I want to recommend you a video that I watched about finding out what your fatal flaws are “Why You Won’t Reach Your Full Potential” by Tina Huang. And also a channel called Heidi Priebe; she talks about a lot of subjects that I don’t see many people talk about and she gives practical advice for long term results. I hope they can help you too. 🫂💞

Speaking of everyone swimming but only just staying afloat: “Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.” -Voltaire. Although personally I prefer the version from Hornblower: “Life is a sinking ship, the tragedy is when we forget to sing as we bail water.”

I’m a dancer laying in bed with a broken foot right now because I went to a dance class when I knew I was too exhausted. My foot wouldn’t have broke if I wasn’t burnt out. This is a hard lesson I needed to learn. I’m prioritizing proper rest from now on since I break a bone a year. My New Year’s resolution is literally to not break a bone.

There’s a point where you have been through so much and have been alone about it you literally don’t care about anything anymore

Dr. K coming in clutch to repair my deteriorating mental health once again. Truly a hero

Brillant video mate. I teach improv acting and getting people comfortable doing nothing on stage is one of the biggest problems. Nothing scares people. They will do anything rather than nothing.

I am 23 years old, what I think about life is what Dr K explains through his video. Due to the struggle of insomnia for 3 years, and after trying everything I reached my breaking point yesterday. Whats even the point of life if I cannot even sleep and I am tired, cant function, cranky, sleepy but cant sleep all day and everyday. And then again if I had tried everything under the sun wouldn't my sleep have fixed already? This reframing helped me to not give up.

@Earthtime3978

4 ай бұрын

Drink celery juice on an empty stomach in the early morning, then go back into bed and lay still. Celery is a natural tonic for one’s nerves. I believe you’ll doze off.

The thing that helped me the most is to NOT think of reframing as "positive" thoughts (wishful thinking) but to think of them as truthful "healthy" thoughts. Thoughts that don't go against my negative thoughts but literally a different veiw on them that is healthy... "breaking up sucks and it hurts but all growth comes from pain. It's impossible for me not to become stronger from this."....or "That chic said no to a date. It's every bit as possible that maybe she just had a breakup or fight with a friend and it has nothing to do with me. A million thinga could the reason." Point is, different perspective healthy thoughts. I heard Mark Manson even talk about "beneficial not true". Whatever you choose to believe doesn't even have to be true, just beneficial.

In one of his previous videos he said that his patients would tell him: "I know you were going to ask that!". That his plan was to eventually change the way of thinking so that he wasn't always neccesary. Now, i feel like some weeks before he post a new video explaining something i've have had that idea recently and basically catches me where i'm at and helps me mold the idea to it's final form. Dr.K... From Cali,Colombia thank you so much for your work!

@thefirsttrillionaire2925

7 ай бұрын

Dude I really want to move there one day coming from south Georgia here in the US! Your country looks amazing!

When I get really upset, the thing that sticks out as most important is to not make it worse.

Lol hilarious timing. I hurt my foot today and spent most of the day in the hospital waiting for my turn for an x-ray. I just sat there and watched the staff working for hours and hours. I loved it.

@kaitsakey6495

3 ай бұрын

Wow. I enjoyed doing the same thing yesterday. Felt strange

This video is about something I have noticed after I burned out. Before I felt doing nothing was a waste of time and life. Nowadays I see and feel that right kind of "doing nothing" gives me creative energy and endurance to do better those things that actually matters. But that doing nothing still isn't that easy. But when you go beyond that "boredom" of doing nothing, you actually find yourself at new place. There lies your creativity and energy to do new things, something more than your mobile device doom scrollings and other digital stuff. Thanks for this video!

Most of my progress has just boiled down to checking shit off of my day-to-day, monthly, yearly goal trees. It makes me feel a lot better knowing I did some laundry today, committed to showing up to that party last month or finally applying for the job I wanted last year but didn't have experience for. Most of my residual time is a whole lot of "nothing" but like Dr. K said, it's how you look at that nothing. To me, drinking and chatting with someone can be productive because it enriches relationships with people I love and sometimes leads to opportunities i otherwise wouldn't have encountered. But at the end of the day, to someone else it looks like my friend and I are doing a whole lot of drinking and talking about nothing. Great vid. Thanks Dr. K

It's kind of like, no matter what happens.... I'll be good and we'll keep going. Up to the point of death itself. Once you accept that your own death could have already happened, everything isn't as bad, and you've already done more than those who have already died and they will never get that chance at all.

This video is extra awesome for me, for two reasons: 1. I’m kind of awesome at cognitive reframing already, in some ways, having done it since I was a teen. It’s really validating to hear I’ve been doing something right. 2. I can still see some really important areas I could apply it better, and more intentionally.

@GeeGe.

7 ай бұрын

Great job man. I haven't been doing it for that long, but I did start during the pandemic and the results are undeniable, even if there's a part of my mind who doesn't think it's "enough" yet. Reframing really is one of the closest things to a life hack I've ever discovered.

The better someone is at doing nothing the easier it gets for you mentally to do anything simply due to the plasticity of your brain and it’s ability to adapt. When you can handle nothingness you can handle anything. I didn’t watch the video just giving my point of view and experience because I learned to be without thoughts in childhood and life feels like eternity since I remember. It’s all the same …. additionally when you can handle nothingness you automatically become calmer and more cantered at everything you do or what your body does since there’s are entirely different things at a certain point it doesn’t matter what your body does or where you are because internally you stay the same throughout it all!! Makes life ridiculously easy. Enjoy your earthy journey

Id been doing this to help me sleep for almost two years. I didnt know it was reframing my brain. Now i know that i have to look for patterns

I don't think I can possibly get any better, I'm already a master at it!

Good timing as I've been stressing about going back to school (at the age of 38) for the last two months. Questioning if I have what it takes to get through the next 2 years. Before I've even started. Journaling/reframing has helped with the anxiety tremendously

@deepfreeze49

7 ай бұрын

As someone who has also recently gone back to school in their late thirties (and was not a particularly good student), go for it. School seemed hard when we were kids, but going back as a real adult who has done real work and suffered real hardship is laughably easy. I am crushing these kids. If it were a team deathmatch I could solo my entire class. And so can you!

@mk0759

7 ай бұрын

It depends what you're going to study, what accreditations the course has and the reputation of the college. Plenty of colleges are selling bills of goods these days. For what my 2 cents is worth: Pick something intended to train you for a specific job you want at the end (that has a shortage of people trained to do it), pick somewhere offering a course accredited by the most reputable national body and industry experience built into the course.

@discopotato675

7 ай бұрын

@@mk0759 I'm taking a 2 year Surgical Technologist program... So the classes are VERY specific and laid out. Which is a plus, as there will be no decisions to be made on what classes to take

@discopotato675

7 ай бұрын

@@deepfreeze49 appreciate the motivating words!!!!

I found that my relationship with procrastination changed significantly when I started doing something like this. Whenever I noticed myself about to distract myself with videos instead of doing the work I needed to do, I would take 10 minutes and ask myself why questions. Why do I feel this way? Why do I think that? If I still didn't feel like doing the work after the 10 minutes, I wouldn't have to do it. But almost every single time, I got up before the 10 minutes were over and started doing the stuff I was procrastinating. The point of this technique is that you very quickly get to a point where you don't know why you feel something or think something, and quite often in this process you realize that your maladaptive thoughts are irrational anyway.

Everything said in this video is 100 percent the truth, the ones who are successful are the ones who don’t give up and the ones stuck in a rut are the ones who do almost always, restructure your mind and the outcomes you will be able to achieve will be incredible

I got insanely stoned last night and found it so incredibly hard to sit and just do nothing. Dr. K im studying for the MCAT right now, im tryna be like you. I feel like not being able to do nothing is infact holding me back from hitting those 510+ scores.

@marinasss77

7 ай бұрын

Yeah weed tends to do the same for me i have to multitask if im stoned..i think its because of the elevated anxiety i experience

@wcjerky

7 ай бұрын

Take it from someone who tried for medical school and failed this year while working 50 hour weeks, living alone, and studying languages: you need rest. The dissociation from the work is worth it. You need to be you, too.

@BoxOfCurryos

7 ай бұрын

boss im sorry to hear that. I hope you get in next year if you will it. I find myself in a privileged position so I could take a shot at it, if I was on my own, I think i'd have fallen apart already. Trying to get into medicine is tricky balancing act that im quickly starting to realize requires you to be off balance to become a better "balancer". wallahi you got this. I hope I make it too. @@wcjerky

@blink182bfsftw

Ай бұрын

Weed is terrible for me for focus, memory, socialization etc. I've been taking edibles every day for the last 4 years tho

"Mopium vs Hopium" is gonna be my new motto going forward, it really articulated the mental process that I want to aim for to better improve myself. This video was EXTREMELY helpful so thank you!

I think this is exactly why psychedelics were such a powerful tool in my early emotional development. They enhanced my ability to step out of my existing perspective and see things in a different way. Those lessons have carried on into my life and have helped me become a much better person today.

Dr. K is a national treasure

You just dropped best video of the year, thank you for this Christmas gift Dr. K. I completely changed my life thanks to you. I already know process of cognitive reframing from your other video and watching my thoughts and cognitive reframing negative thoughts was the biggest part that helped I feel.

Being able to put this all into a 20 minute video is absolutely phenomenal. Thank you for the suggestion to think about what I have learned and can take with me into the future after my setback! I will keep on doing this and put your video on speed dial to remind me.

One of the most helpful Dr. K videos for me personally- and I’ve watched almost all of them. I’ve felt stuck for awhile. And not sure which avenue to to really “do” to fix my general malaise. Thank you. The cognitive reframe is so good.

doing nothing = cognitive reframing = hopeium = change your mind set => accept the truth = awareness = change your thinking pattern = giving up becomes set back = doing nothing ( do less of first two coping 1. emotional coping 2. standard copeium (problem solving) but instead 3. hopeium which is cognitive reframing which is not giving up which leads to eventually doing something that's not create more problem. By just doing that, it actually helps and better solving the un-solvable problem.

The moment that allowed me to finally unlock the ability to reframe my thoughts was when I was diagnosed bipolar 2. A brief explanation: I was diagnosed with depression at 14, never really related to the diagnosis. I thought there was nothing wrong with me, which probably meant I was actually a sociopathic narcissist acting like a baby for attention. This made me hate myself more, and have really bad bouts of depression. The bipolar 2 diagnosis totally clicked, and I felt a huge burden come off my shoulders. It was like, before I felt "there's nothing wrong with me, so there's something REALLY wrong with me." But now I felt, "there's something wrong with me, so actually there's nothing wrong with me!" This allowed me to completely recontextualize my depressive mood swings. I no longer had to spiral into self hatred. Now its just like, "oh, this sucks, I feel depressed right now. Well, I'll feel better later." It's more like a passing cold or something than a deep black vortex that sucks me in. And since then, I've been able to change my thought patterns from negative to a minimum of neutral, but often all the way to positive. Still haven't quite got a hold of my anger issues when I'm on the hypomanic end, though. Getting better, but still could be a lot more so.

@olhalystopad5517

7 ай бұрын

That is really inspiring, wish you all the best 🙏

@SJNaka101

7 ай бұрын

@@olhalystopad5517 thanks! I tell my story in random comment sections sometimes, with the hope that something helpful might click for someone else!

Finally a Dr. K advice that I can practice on everyday

@KnzoVortex

7 ай бұрын

I mean 5 minutes jotting down three columns sounds like a manageable thing to fit into your daily routine ;)

I believe this kind of information can even apply to people who get caught in scams or bad investments, who for example might think "It'll go back up", "It's just a dip" and so on. They get stuck in a similar re-framing loop instead of admitting the much simpler solution of recovering what they have left. Gambling addictions even.

if I can give my two cents of wisdom on the matter I will because I went through hell and was able to get over it by actually doing nothing at all. I got to a point where I was so emotionally and mentally drained that I decided that I would just sit on my coutch and do absolutely nothing at all until I got better. For hours and hours I sat there looking inwards, not saying to myself that I was meditating I just told myself to just be as it was the only way for me to be able to get through it, at the end of what seemed like a very intense and tumultous brain storming sesssion that drained me even more, i began to see every thing so clearly and felt high but I felt an inner sens of calm and peace, as if all I needed to do was to stop and to listen to myself. Believe it or not I went from being a depressed dude (who didn't know how badly depressed he was) to a dude who loves his life and is looking forward to getting up each morning and becoming the best version of himself he can be. Not gonna sugar coat it, it was rough, but it was worth it. Don't forget yourselves guys, stop running away from yourselves, find some time for you and only you ;)

But the thing with emotional coping is this: What if you get more depressed and therefore less productive when you don't cope emotionally? I tried to completely stay away from KZread for a month to have more time for studying (I use no other social media or video streaming service at the moment) but it made me feel so empty and lonely that I felt even less motivated to study... Timing seems to be a big factor. Rewarding myself with maybe 2 or 3 hours of KZread after studying is very different from starting the day with it and then getting lost in endless scrolling and clicking for the rest of the day.

@pineapplethief4418

7 ай бұрын

This has a name. It's a withdrawal

the editing has improved! the pauses between phrases are a little longer. I still prefer the longer pauses of live videos but this is better than before

A nice easy starter cognitive reframe I got from my therapist is the statement "in the past, I have done x". I had a tendency to say "I do x". She would point out that in the past I have needed those coping mechanisms, and in my head I'm like "yeah but it's not the past, it was literally only last Wednesday" and then I think "oh wait, yeah, LAST Wednesday, so that IS technically the past". Even this post contains a cognitive reframe by me saying "I had a tendency to say". I may sometimes still do that, but the accurate framing does not state that as a tendency that I currently have, because while sometimes I slip into it, I don't always do it, and when I DO slip into it, I work to reframe it when I pick up on it. So yeah. That's a thing.

Very important topic. “Sometimes doing less produces more.” This has been my personal experience for over 60 years. There are many examples that I can offer, but I will leave you with one. I sometimes feel guilty for not doing anything on a Weekend day or days, thus, I will force myself to do something that might make me ,feel’ productive. Results: I feel worse because I end up not completing anything and my brain is even more burned out. Rest, do nothing productive at least one day a week.

Appreciate you so much Dr K!!!

This video pairs nicely with Dr. K’s video on “Why Charisma Isn’t What You Think It Is” and the topic of vision and vision implementation. Having a vision for how you want your life to be seems highly synergistic with cognitive reframing.

Thank you for a wonderful video! Acceptance of the ‘thing’ is what I’ve found to be the most helpful first step. You do a great job in your discussion about cognitive reframing to give specific steps of how you can actively reframe your thoughts. I think it’s important to note that you it’s difficult to get there unless you choose to truly accept what happened. Acknowledge the discomfort or what I like to call, contrast, then move into reframing. Find your expectations, notice how they were met. I like to call it ‘making it all OK.’ You don’t have to like it, but accept that it did in fact happen is the first step:) Thanks for all of your wonderful content. I add these words just in case it resonates with others.

its so good to come home and just do absolutely nothing for a while after a while of always listening to something to not really be able to think at work (it's a very monotonous job) i was like "fuck it, i'm not going to listen to anything that gets in the way of my thoughts" and i had an existential crisis but came out of it with new purpose and motivation so like it's like a pool in summer, you can be uncomfortably hot outside all day or you can jump in and feel unpleasant things for a bit in exchange of being at peace

Это офигенно. Теперь я чувствую себя шикарно, и не виню себя в том, что хочу просто полежать на диване в канун нового года. Я даже смог пересмотреть свой взгляд на сложившуюся ситуацию, что тоже улучшило моё состояние. Спасибо!

I think one of the problems with trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems is that it sucks up too much of your time and energy, especially when it comes to dating. Yes, I might be able to succeed with online dating if I spent six hours a day messaging women, but I have my own goals and hobbies to focus on. I can at least have some control in those areas, but ultimately, you can’t control what other people do. It’s not that I’ve given up on dating, but if it happens, it’s going to be a natural consequence of my daily life and actions, not something I have to waste time pursuing. One of my problems with a lot of psychological advice is that most of it is rooted in coping mechanisms, not practical solutions. Coping mechanisms can work when trying to deal with unsolvable problems such as the death of a loved one, or when the problems are primarily internal, such as feeling a sense of meaningless, but they’re limited when the problems are at least partially external.

@tuesss

7 ай бұрын

I'm pretty sure that's why it was proposed as a mediocre workaround, not the top-tier solution this video was actually about.

@krupatroopa1098

7 ай бұрын

I could be misunderstanding, but it kinda feels like you missed the point of this specific video? Or rather what you’re saying just doesn’t follow from actual studies and science. If we take Dr. K at his word, it objectively doesn’t take too much of your time and energy to try at dating, or any other very challenging and immovable issue. It is the trying itself that creates a more positive mentality and will lead to more success. Of course 6 hours a day on any dating app isn’t healthy, but deleting the app and letting dating become an entirely passive thing isn’t going to get you anywhere either. And more importantly, as this video emphasizes, it will ruin your mentality and lead to worse outcomes overall. The practical solution is to change how you think about it, because there is no real practical solution to a lot of life’s issues. You can’t just look for a cheat code or easy answer, it’s not that simple. All the dating advice going around proves that more than anything because it’s not really helping most people. The issue with the dating market is the people and how they approach dating, and arguably giving up is contributing to that. (Not at all an attempt to blame you for feeling that way)

@computerKwastaken

7 ай бұрын

Yes yes yes! This is exactly what I'm thinking. Thanks for putting this out there. I do have to say, I don't think that you should entirely drop dating. I can understand online dating, but in person dating, shooting your shot, that sort of thing you should still do. Entirely "giving up" isn't the right way to pursue this. But I do believe that the energy you could be spending on the dating scene being pushed or re-allocated to your own goals and hobbies is a brilliant method. I wish all the best for you man. :)

@batman5224

7 ай бұрын

@@krupatroopa1098 I spent around an hour a day messaging women for around two years. Nothing ever came of it. I got close to going on a date a few times, but was ghosted. Logically, I could have increased my odds by spending more time and messaging more women, but as I said, I have better ways to spend my time. I obviously don’t expect easy answers, but I prefer advice where my task and objective are clearly defined. Changing one’s mindset alone is nothing more than a coping mechanism for dealing with the injustices of the world.

One of the best advices ever. Doctor K also mentioned it in his previous videos about extrenalizing attention. Honestly, just laying down doing fucking nothing and staring at the ceiling is a good practice. Not meditation, no fancy cognitive reframings, just forcing yourself doing nothing for as long as possible. I don't listen music or youtube, put away the phone, turn the TV off and embrace the waves of boredom that is so bad, it almost gets physical. And then it gets better. It just works.

THIS IS A CHEAT CODE TO LIFE: This feels very powerful. Got lost around the @15:00 mark and based on the replayed graph I am part of the majority who did. I had to stop what I was doing and re-listen to it multiple times. Way I recap it is: instead of crying that I am level 1 and the task requires level 100 one can instead realize that there are a bunch of levels required to reach success and get exited about all the leveling up that's on the road obtaining the capacity to succeed at the task. Making a habit of viewing life this way feels OP !!

problem solving can also be a crutch to avoid feeling negative feelings, as a way prevent them bc we cant tolerate them and we may just keep solving superficial problems

Literally a yapping session of how it's never over and how we are so back literally the best I've seen today

This is great stuff. Sometimes you should feel bad, about some things, but you don't have to feel bad about everything. There is a time for work and their is a time for play. Too much of either is bad for you.

Cognitive re framing was exactly what my therapist went to when i first met her, and after using the methods she told me it actually has given me a better outlook on most things over all.

Doing nothing is extremely hard

How is that "doing nothing"? Title sounds like it's manifesting the importance of taking a real break and giving yourself breating room (not thinking about doing "more" all day, every minute), but the video talks about mental work/reframing.

What Dr. K discusses with this video is the very first of a few mental excercises that CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) teaches with professional psychological help. I know that, at first, the excercise seems dumb. But right now I apply this almost constantly in my life. I used to have automatic negative responses to every situation I have back in the first few years of being diagnosed as a Bipolar I patient. But seeing how cognitive reframing is as powerful as what Dr. K hypes it up to be cannot be understated. Just changing the way you look at thing and rewiring how your brain responds to problems makes it easier to just do "nothing" effectively. I attest that this is one of the core things that people should learn first if they want to change their lives in a productive way. Much love to Dr. K for sharing this powerful tool to all of you, it's certainly a great way to be productive while doing "nothing."

I accidentally did cognitive reframing without knowing it. When doing parts work, a part called me out on it, accusing me of ‘coping’ with my problems and distress, by simply telling myself a different story or narrative about a situation. I didn’t know that was a good thing, and I would have believed I was still coping and avoiding. “I know my alter ego is technically myself role playing it, but if I stay ignorant of it, then that’s at least a little more separation from the intensity of living.” Instead of, “I am powerless to an alter ego I can’t will myself over.” BIG DIFFERENCE.

I don't think the term Dr.K used for the solution here is correct. I wouldn't call it "doing nothing", rather it should be called "focusing on doing the right thing". Because cognitive reframing IS doing something. Even when the person is not doing anything physically, it still takes lots of mental energy, because analysing and alternating thoughts is hard work. For many people, I would say that their problems come from the mind being too fractured because they let their emotions take control of them. Imagine a group of chickens seeing a wolf. The fear makes them lose the ability to think and thus they run around mindlessly, making them easy targets for the predator. So what should be done in this case? First try to control the emotion: Take a deep breath, look around, assess the situation (internal and external) then the ability to think will come back and the solution will also slowly appear. This is also why frequent meditation can not only help you solve your problems better, but also help your body becomes healthier. When your body is not under stress, your body focus doesn't run everywhere, instead, it can calmly assess the problem (inflammation, virus, bacteria, etc.) and attackt/heal it better. So the solution is to take a few deep breaths, try to calm down, stop letting your emotions take charge of you, see what really is the problem and WHAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY SOLVE, and focus on that. This way you will waste less energy doing unnecessary things and start doing the right thing

Dr.K just in time with another fuckin bangerrrrrrrrrr 🔥🔥🔥

@quaffie

8 ай бұрын

no u

This video really clicked for me. Thank you. Applying it is hard, but im already learning.

This was great. I have a playlist that I listen to when things are tough. I listen to them on a regular basis to keep me grounded. This is a perfect addition. Thank you

My solution to feeling hopeless was to join DSA and start community organizing. Definitely makes me feel like I am improving things rather than watching it all go to crap and worrying about it.

I been workin 12 hours a day 7 days a week for about half this month so im lookin forward to hopefully getting to do this soon haha

@jimskeuh

7 ай бұрын

you feeling burnt out?

Wow… this really helped me think through something that has been bothering me for quite some time. I changed the way I thought about it by following the steps and I can now approach it with less anger and more logic. Dang… wait this is the most helpful video of his that I’ve ever come across. And most of them are already pretty informative. I feel changed lol

Litterally sat down to watch this video for a 15 minute rest before I needed to go back to what I actually needed to do which usually when I do this I just wont do anything else, so you helped just by talking about "fixing" problems by coping emotionally.

This reminds of Office Space when “Nothing? You don’t need a million dollars to do nothing. Look at my cousin. He’s broke and still don’t do sh*t.”

Dr k: "do nothing" Me: got it. Ez Dr k: "write down emotions" Me:... That's not nothing x_x Dr k:"it'll feel cumbersome" Me: yuh Love you Dr k! 😂

I'm reminded of a moment in Terry Pratchett's novel "Interesting Times" about a group of old barbarian heroes who were really tough old geezers because they got old in the field where people die young. One character notices that they were resting "like cats do", when they were doing nothing they didn't need anything to distract them, they were actually doing Nothing

Dr K, Thank you for these video's man. You have given me the motivation and courage to change my life at 29 years old and stop feeling like shit all the time. You have also made an awesome community here, thanks everyone.

I don't get it. Should I do something or do nothing...?

@bscott9141

7 ай бұрын

Right like the point didn't exactly come full circle.

@rageofraven

7 ай бұрын

The idea is that doing the wrong thing is worse than doing nothing at all.

@teeeteee000

7 ай бұрын

Confusing AF!

The best mindset you can apply to your life: „Do things that are not enough“ - Dr.K

I realized I always had some sort of media on. Every second of every day. Music, podcast, series, KZread. Now I'm doing some sort of intermittent media fasting. No media of any kind from the moment I wake up till 1pm. It's insane how much this helped with my depression. You're actually able to think and reflect on your own thoughts.

Dr. K keeps helping me realize small positive things that I’ve done in my life that are actually backed by science. Sometimes the answers to the most complicated things are actually really simple. Cognitive reframing is so important.

1. Write down initial thoughts in 1st column 2. Think about what your role models/other healthy people say to that and write that in 2nd column 3. Notice the intuitive resistance to good thoughts, note them down on third column 4. Take a deep breath and think about which ones (or one) in second column which you can accept and spend some time thinking about 5. This change the pattern and it’ll trigger better thoughts automatically

@jimskeuh

7 ай бұрын

so the second colomn should be full of positive thoughts but do they need to be realistic or like over the top (unrealistic)?

@schmetd6081

7 ай бұрын

@@jimskeuh well what would the ideal person with a healthy mindset say? id say people like that are more realistic than overly positive

Look at all these comments from people who didn’t even watch the video lmao

@Dandnayak778

8 ай бұрын

Bcoz they're chronically online and attention deficit

I'm glad this is the first video of 2024 I'm watching from you.

Makes sense. I notice myself slower at problem solving and intellectual work, which I thought was weird when I was every day listening to podcasts about topics relevant to my degree and ways to work within it.

*I'm already pro at doing nothing*

I've decided my cognitive reframe is, "Because I was born in this world".

@jimskeuh

7 ай бұрын

doesn't sound like a positive reaction more synical

@KnzoVortex

7 ай бұрын

@@jimskeuhLowkey depends highly on what emotional connotations simply existing has for someone. It might conjure one’s feelings of despair at a seeming lack of meaning, or an opportunity to take a step back and stop taking things so seriously. Which type of person you are is frankly imo largely malleable by engaging in a consistent spiritual practice. Meditators claim if you meditate well enough a certain distance between you and your thought and emotion arises, allowing you to handle your emotions that much more lightly and equanimously as they are not so caught up in their thoughts or emotions. The more this is developed, the more a reminded that life is all kinda whatever is actually refreshing rather than causing dispair.

i remember being so dependent on my past romantic relationships that i would break down and have panic attacks when i had to break up with my exes because of how i was truly feeling which was nothing at all romantically for them after two months. I have dated at least three guys that i thought i liked, but it turned out they were just being nice to me and were slightly attractive that my anxious mind found an opportunity for someone to care about me romantically. Like a child seeing a pretty candy prop at a candy store and biting into it, and tasting the plastic that the fake candy was. Its been about two years since i had panic attacks from releasing my true feelings to my ex and how it was so hard to let him go when i thought i wanted him forever. It was EXTREMELY difficult and i thought i was going to die. Today im in therapy and use cognitive reframing everyday. I still get triggered over little things but i always learn a lesson from them. I try to always think before i act, rewire my negative thoughts, allow all emotions, and act when i NEED to act to make my life better. I love your channel! it has inspired me to really change myself. Thank you.

Thank you so much Dr K. I am forever grateful for you taking the time to teach us these things. I’m learning new things everyday. You’re a legitimate hero.