The Flachspüler is first and foremost a never ending source of pride. Look, what an enourmous pile , what temple I have built.

@Amber57499

4 жыл бұрын

I hate those things. I always have to fill a bucket with water because my piles are so gigantonormous that the tank isn't enough

@rodalfderraticht2041

4 жыл бұрын

@@Amber57499 but isn't that the most prestigious pride, beeing forced to flush several times?

@Amber57499

4 жыл бұрын

@@rodalfderraticht2041 I don't know. I have no talents, no money, no woman in my life. That's enough shit. But maybe the shit that won't flush is a metaphor describing my puny existence.

@katievonolendorp5894

4 жыл бұрын

@@Amber57499 Money is not important if you become a hippie. Everybody has a talent, even if it is a little hidden. Find out what you really like and watch vids here about it to get the skills. Other people do the same. Every artist for example has to learn the basics. And then stop to shit in bucketts. Become proud of the temples you built! 😁👍🏻😆 Be proud of who you are. Wear your head above your neck, not in front it. Look upwards and laugh as much as possible. And whenever you think something destructive put 4 very positive thoughts after it: your favourite holiday place, pizza, football team...whatever. It just should be positive. This makes new connections in your brain. And after a few weeks you have a totally different shine that surrounds you. You don't need beauty, muscles, money or even legs to find the perfect lady for you! But a relationship built on bad feelings and sadness is always kinda toxic. But when you train your brain to be positive your face will show this with its lines. Keep your body upright and tell yourself to be proud until you believe it. Once you startet to tell you that your life is shit. And you even believe this. But you have a computer to communicate, an intact brain, wishes and a life. And you are probably not dying of hunger. And you are hopefully not homeless. And you don't live in a country of war and destruction where you lost your whole family, right? Your life is much better than other people's lives on this planet. Be happy! Smile, sing, dance and explore life once more. And when you really feel this you will find your lady and a better job for sure. ♡ Another great thing is meditation: train your brain to be empty. No thoughts. Just feel your breath, your body, the moment right now. No past, no future, no thoughts, no problems. Just you and your pure existance. It takes training. Stop breathing for a moment and find out that your brain stops thinking in this second. And hold this feeling as long as possible. It will be longer for a second every day and then these moments will feel like holiday and helps you calm down in every situation. I tell you all this because I felt the same and I know how painful it is to have these sad thoughts about the own life. I was so depressive and I even thought to did not care about dropping dead... I got out of all this by these simple things I told you. And by the thought that I have the value to be here. It is not by chance. I am here to explore life with all its shades. And now you recovered the darker ones which gives your character depth and deep thoughts and empathy for others. This is more attractive for a lady than somebody who would laugh at her problems. I am sure you will find your way out if you really want. And if it is your greatest wish to finish with this try this out. You will feel changes immediately. Laugh for 5 minutes without reason and you will feel so much better and relaxed because your body breathes better and deeper and fills up with endorphines. Do it before leaving tge door and pleople will react different on you. Also the ladies. My very best wishes for you! From the bottom of my heart!♡♡♡

@prakharpouranick

4 жыл бұрын

@@katievonolendorp5894 Danke :)

Interessant, dass man erst englische Videos gucken muss um rauszufinden wie etwas auf deutsch heißt 😄

@locust76

4 жыл бұрын

Das wusste ich auch nicht, bin auch Amerikaner und hab mich auch vor 20 Jahren wegen den komischen deutschen Toiletten gewundert lol

@bernhardkrickl3567

4 жыл бұрын

But in case of the Flachspüler I cared much less about its name than I cared about getting rid of the thing and replacing it with a "proper" toilet.

@foty8679

4 жыл бұрын

@@locust76 Hat aber bei weitem nicht jeder deutsche so eine Toilette.

@TheFeldhamster

4 жыл бұрын

@@bernhardkrickl3567 you mean one of the crappy Tiefspülers where every time you drop a shit you get a "nice" splash of cold shit water? I mean, yeah, they prevent stink if you "sit and brood" on your turd and yeah, you might not have to brush them as much and maybe you think using the toilet brush is gross. But how on earth can you not be totally grossed out by that splash of cold, ugly, dirty water coming right back up at you when you drop your turd? Plus, Flachspüler flush much better. I think it's because the water is accellerated when it has to go over the flat part. I have had Flachspülers at all my homes and I'm never going to give them up for one of those awful Tiefspülers. I've sat (and shat) on many different types of Tiefspüler during bathroom breaks in different jobs or at restaurants, gyms, etc. and most of them flushed less well and *all* of them gave me an unwanted splash. Terrbile things!

@rsmaster5637

4 жыл бұрын

The Flachspüler is the best .. i would change it for every other Toilet.

Du traust dich was und machst das richtig gut, sogar in der Fremdsprache. Kompliment, Vince Ebert!

Flachspüler - also known as the "lay and display" toilet.

Me: hearing a German joke Also me: *Nicken* we Germans don’t laugh

We also have a “flachspüler” in Hungary. It’s useful to take a look at it to see its consistency. It’s easy to take a stool sample, too.

@huba3885

3 жыл бұрын

as a famous food critic checking the consistency is very important for me because the world depends on my Yelp food reviews

Wie Bleigiessen an Sylvester. Hmmm,....eine Schnecke? Die Zahl Sechs? Oder die Neun? Was mag das nur bedeuten? ^^

@alodievichy4237

4 жыл бұрын

😂👍

@AlexanderGoeres

4 жыл бұрын

bleigießen is like i ching ... you need the book to interpret the stuff

@mikebuckley5171

3 жыл бұрын

Die Bayern machen Brezen

I'll never forget coming across my first Flachspüler. No one warned me. I literally tried to ride it backwards the first time.

Forget the solution - it's the problem, that counts!

Herr Ebert, Vielen Dank für Ihren Humor und Wissen! Sie sind ein Held unter uns!

Thanks, Vince Ebert. I thought, we as a people had an agreement to not talk about the Flachspüler whilst non-German people are in the room. Like we had an agreement that Bielefeld doesn't exist ...

Wie geil ist das denn!? Sehr gut, Hr. Ebert!!!!

That joke i heard from Zizek.

Intelligent comedy is an art you have re-defined, Herr Ebert - luvvit

Yes and dress up in a formal Hugo Boss even for the most informal thing your going to do 🤣

To all people who think that this is a joke by Zizek that Ebert stole - it can already be read in Erica Jong's novella "fear of flying" from 1973.

@kedabro1957

3 жыл бұрын

Its learning obscure facts like this that keep me addicted to comment section.

Loved it! Loved it! Loved the joke! Laughing so hard!!

Hahaha. I actually got one of those while back, when I was renting a flat. Always thought of it as a toilet for sentimental people. Last look before this thing you made goes away forever. I thought ugh disgusting. But I looked. Every time.

@d33p

2 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣

@TT-Freak

Жыл бұрын

Haha that cracked me up.:)

The best conclusion of the Flachspüler would be: REMEMBER your history! Look what you have done!

He's brilliant

Zizek called. He wants his Joke back.

Er ist sogar sehr gut zu verstehen, dennoch die Frage: gibts das auf DVD, evtl. mit deutschem Text oder UT?

Originally found out by Slavoij Zizek

more like these??? ☺☺☺

This joke was made by Slavoj Zizek a looong time ago... I'm not saying this dude copies.... just saying somebody already thought about it.

Yeah the flachspüler mystified me for a moment.

LMAO I'm dying

LMAO. That was interesting.

I just call it a Präsentierteller. Always have. Everybody does, right?

The flachspüler market share has dropped to under 10% nowadays

🙈...never ever imagined that shit could have so much of logic...!😂

Den Flachspüler finde ich auch immer was ganz besonderes, denn wenn der Haufen nicht allzu hoch wird, dass mein Schniedel reinhängt, (was ziemlich ekelhaft ist,) kann ich schön betrachten welches Ausmaß mein Kunstwerk wieder angenommen hat.

Du solltest das bei 9gag posten. Nicht das als youtube link sondern bei 9gag hochladen. gerade das könnte gut ankommen!!!

Based on Slavoj Zizek. I Guess he forgot to mention him.

Uhh da hat jemand Slavoj Žižek gelesen über die Ideologie der Toilette :D.

Now I'm curious what that looks like and how the hell to spell it.

@Cremon342

4 жыл бұрын

"Flachspüler" www.google.com/search?q=flachsp%C3%BCler&client=firefox-b-d&sxsrf=ALeKk01GvAKdIH_hxFrYQL4GZAua2JQCvA:1590255351959&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjQ8OvqwsrpAhXRVsAKHQd_Cn0Q_AUoAXoECA0QAw&biw=1920&bih=966#imgrc=bOtVZzhaXr1eaM

So wenige Kommentare :(

I love Flachspüler. I hate it when the pee-water fight back. 🤣

Is that a bed?

😂😂😂

😂

YOU UTTER FOOL!THE GERMAN SCIENCE IS THE WORLD FINEST

The Flachspüler is the Präsentationsstandt😂 Presentation stand ...

...wie nimmt man eigentlich eine Stuhlprobe - bei einer NICHT-Flachspüler-Toilette? :P

@rudimeergans5741

4 жыл бұрын

Christian D. Das ist doch einfach: Man hält die Hand drunter!

@norbertfleck812

4 жыл бұрын

Die Bekämpfung der damals weit verbreiteten Wurminfektionen war der Grund, warum in den 1930-er Jahren der Flachspüler auf breiter Basis eingeführt wurde und sich bis in die 1980er Jahre gehalten hat.

@pleindespoir

4 жыл бұрын

Damit: de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schauml%C3%B6ffel#/media/Datei:Schaumloeffel.jpg

@Katzenkotze85

4 жыл бұрын

@@pleindespoir 😂😂😂

@lonestarr1490

4 жыл бұрын

@@pleindespoir Funktioniert leider nicht bei Durchfall ...

Makes me so proud I bought a Mercedes-Benz. It sums up a wonderful country’s way of thinking Quite sad my country departed Europe yesterday

Wir hatten früher in meiner Kindheit auch son komischen Flachspüler. Fand ich schon immer komsich das Teil. Hat sich zum Glück nicht durchgesetzt. Heut sieht man den kaum noch.

@User-ls4wy

8 ай бұрын

Meine Schwiegereltern haben noch nen flachspüler

Sachen wie diese lassen mich erkennen warum ich mich so gut mit Engländern verstehe ... kein Flachspühler.

Flachspüler sind einfach die besten Toiletten, da wird einem wenigstens nicht der ganze Arsch nass gespritzt.

Das ist witzig 😁

For anyone that comes and wonders what a flachspüler looks like. www.google.com/search?q=flachsp%C3%BCler&oq=flachsp&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0l3.14694j0j9&client=ms-android-sprint-us-sscr-revc&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8

I thought this was specifically a Dutch thing

A stand-up comedian steals a joke from another comedian. No one bats an eyelid. It's the delivery, the timing and context that counts. A science cabaret performer ('Wissenschaftscabaretist' is Ebert's own term for his act) steals a joke from a philosopher, and people go nuts. I guess Ebert has set a high standard for himself. Or maybe the internet police need to use the Flachspüler and examine their own dumps.

Neue Toiletten sind keine Flachspüler mehr.

also wenn mir irgendwann son flachspüler übern weg läuft setz ich mich glaub einfach verkehrtrum drauf ... ;D (.. nein, kein kopfstand!! ;P )

German Science is the best in the world

In Ungarn gibts auch flackspulern.

Dann hol mal ne Stuhlprobe wenn du keinen Flachspüler hast 🤣

ok, scheint gar nicht so trivial zu sein, wie erwartet.

Recht hat Es, ich möchte jetzt endlich Toiletten von Daimler putzen, es müssen noch nicht einmal Flachspüler sein!

Da hat er sogar recht.

I'm not conVINCEd, but senk u anyvay...

@nraphael9004

4 жыл бұрын

Senk you...! 😄

Similar to indian!!

Womens farts don't smell, but suddenly you can't feel your legs..

You can tell a lot about the health of your digestion by examining your excrements. Everybody knows how it should come out.

the flachspüler has obviously medical reasons - with a look on the stool, u can detect many diseases; besides of the better practicallity of taking stoolprobes. ^^

Did he copied this joke from Slavoj Zizek or is it the other way around??

Se Flachspüler. Wer kennt ihn nicht

„The Problem is more important than it’s Solution“.......könnte von der Kanzlistin in Berlin sein.

@pleindespoir

4 жыл бұрын

"than it’s" wher have you englisch learn?

@ALP839

4 жыл бұрын

@@pleindespoir LEARNT

Very scathologic way to search for god :p

1:55 der ältere Herr guckt immer, als würde er irgendwie persönlich angegriffen. Oder er versteht kein Wort.

I'm german and I'm very happy to not have a flachspüler at home.

Deep inside he is a proud German and insults US-americans!

Just stolen from Zizek. Pittyfull but Ebert Niveau.

@pyrointeam

4 жыл бұрын

Erica Jong "fear of flying" 1973. Everyone "steals" don't be pathetic and cry about, chance are high you make a fool out of yourself trying to be a "Klugscheißer" but actually having the wrong information.

Stolen joke from Slavoj Zizek...

Stolen from slavoi zhizek

Would the joke become worse if you told something like "once a very wise philosopher suggested tbe following explanation of that..." or if you don't like to call him wise blame communism for thoughts on shit... But maybe I'm wrong and zizek also didn't cone up with that "theory" on his own

Flachspuler is NOT German. The Germans have the same system as the Brits. The Flachspuler is the toilet we use in the NETHERLANDS.

@Ginkoman2

4 жыл бұрын

Thats simply not true. The classic german toilet is the said flachspüler, but in newer buildings the english style can be found more and more often. younger people seem to prefer the the water filled style. the second thing is the dutch are just swamp germans.

I don't get it. Wtf did I just watch

Pragmatist is horrible. Extremly selfish and harmful!

The representative of the nation of thinkers has as usual stolen the idea from a southerner... this issue has been addressed by Slovenian phyhoanalist Slavuj Zizek long time ago... very original ... guy in a british cut suit, paddling Slovinian original ideas ....

nicht witzig

@norbertfleck812

4 жыл бұрын

Doch 😅