One of the reasons I love Vanessa so much and find her to be so relatable is because she actually was a shy person at one point in her life so she k wow what it feels like and she has completely changed her way of life so it gives hope to people who are incredibly shy . Her method works and it can be done thank you Vanessa

she's incredible, just a matter of time before she becomes much better known

What a high level conversation .. jeez. They are both razor sharp

These are two true titans, and anyone lucky enough to spend quality time on Vanessa and Jordan's content will be lightyears ahead in the direction they want to go, socially speaking. God Bless, and THANK YOU!

Confidence & Caring tone is attractive!!!

The thing about anger is interesting. When I encounter angry people I actually see them as having lost control of their lives. If every day things bother them so much they get angry over little things they don't have a handle on their emotions and to me that's not masculine.

Vanessa Van Edwards seems like a wonderful person to be around! This is an amazing interview: I learned about myself, and got insight into my awkward past. If you judge high school on solely being known and liked (which I don't) my high school experience would be considered horrible: I mean I was super shy and awkward. But I learned how to grow and be more open, and learned skills like these about how to communicate, and I grew as a person. Thanks for this interview!

@samsmusichub

7 жыл бұрын

I searched for her name after seeing an interview of hers on Chase Jarvis' channel, and found this!

@samsmusichub

7 жыл бұрын

This is the first one I've seen.

@samsmusichub

7 жыл бұрын

Great. Thanks for letting me know!

first day I have ever listened to anything of Vanessa's, and it happens to be her birthday very cool. Happy birthday.

I'm such a sucker for book plugs at the end of a podcast. Excited to read!

Venessa Van Edwards is an amazing human investigator ...I have learnt a lot and understood really a lot through your videos ...I have been watching your videos for nearly four years now and I feel and anyone who sees me feel that I have changed a lot ...I have become more confident , successful and loved ....80% of it is thanks to you ....I bought your book as well ( captivate )....marvellous I really owe you a lot...thank you

You are amazing woman! Love the content and how you explain everything.A hug from Argentina

WOW! This is the best interview of Vanessa Van Edwards that I've watched so far. They have nice chemistry together which made the whole thing very interesting all through out.

Your every video teaches me a new aspect to myself, Vanessa!

Two remarkably engaging speakers. Loved the information.

I landed here because of the interest in Scott Adam's insights on Donald Trump. I'm very impressed in what I have seen so far so I'm subscribing to your channel.

Best Episode of (The Art of Charm)

Jordan to be completely honest, I couldn't get the idea of the caricature out of my head from listening to so many of your podcasts. This is the first time I've see you in reality. Its incredible how you create an image of someone from voice and tone alone. Keep up the god work man! Its been very helpful to my life. I was a bit weary at the start with the name of the podcast but you have brought nothing but great actionable advice to my life on a weekly basis

Been listening to AoC for a while now (podcast). One of the better episodes!

Always enjoy Vanessa’s videos and research!

Omgggg this is so insightful. The scienceee, the dialogue 😊❤️🙏🏼 so good

Great content! I'm definitely glad I came across this and am a new fan of Jordan and Vanessa!

@DowniePhotographyCleveland

7 жыл бұрын

I haven't yet, but I'll definitely check it out!

I absolutely love this new video format

Great Content! Everyone has different personalities and to be around people with different ones is such a great idea. Play with your strengths…Not against them!

Vanessa, I love your personality. You seem so fun and real. You look like you are a good friend. I have been reading everything I can on you and watching all your videos that I find. I THINK YOUR GREAT. I AM SIGNED UP FOR EMAIL. Thanks a bunch. Love your stuff.

@daniellebenoit1341

7 жыл бұрын

no but i will right now

@daniellebenoit1341

7 жыл бұрын

thank u

Great interview, bottle of thanks to Vanessa

Very interesting. Thanks for putting this together. It's awesome.

Like the guest a lot. One thing: the scientific proof behind popularity is by no means a proof. The fact that popular kids smile more and that they like the most people, might (likely) be caused by their popularity. When I was in high school I was one of the smallest and weakest, I did have many friends (because I was witty, fun and friendly but was not popular. It has changed since I have become more jacked than most people who hit the gym and I also grew taller - this helped to become popular for sure.

Re the popularity thing: this doesn't really discover anything because it doesn't show causation. I mean, if loads of people love you... you're bound to love them back! It doesn't show that liking others CAUSED you to be more likable. It could may well have been something else that counted for popularity and being popular, obviously makes you like those who deem you to be popular. I personally think assertiveness, confidence and dominating others has a TONNE to do with popularity - way more than looks, clothes, athleticism etc. Because confidence isn't "you will like me" - it's "I'll be fine if you don't" and most of these kids came from the type of backgrounds where no matter what happened to them, they had a support system that meant they would be fine no matter what. To be able to have this mindset - I feel like you have to have grown up in a home where this was the norm AND got a tonne of reinforcement from your parents that you were the ****, they have your back 100% etc. I got bullied by kids that were significantly less good-looking and had less going for them than me - but I had massive anxiety and they were confident/assertive and was bullied, for example, by guys that I would never consider dating. I also have a friend who is the epitome of male good-looking, social, charming, smart etc and he actually went on to become a successful actor (not a Hollywood movie star, but several roles in high-end TV dramas for the major networks etc) and he was majorly bullied in high school (and it's not like he underwent a transformation into a stud - he was still the same guy). He was popular in the sense of "beloved" but he was nowhere near assertive enough to be popular in the "cool" sense and most of the guys hated him and picked on him (a lot of the girls loved him). Most of the people who bullied him are now even uglier, more overweight, several kids at a young age etc. Another guy I dated in high school, super smart, super hot, ambitious etc went on to found 3 companies and he got incredibly bullied. The reason why intelligent people tend to be less popular (hence the nerd effect) is the Dunning-Kruger effect. Stupid people think they're smarter than they are and hence are more assertive/confident/dominant. Intelligent people know how little they know, and hence are way less confident. Now, some of the "popular" kids did turn out to be successful, don't get me wrong. But these were the ones that also had some other qualities such as good-looks and intelligence etc (the majority of the cool kids didn't) and they were successful in fields that require you to dominate others and use social power - sales, management, business development etc. The more creative, innovate, entrepreneurial type of success, or indeed acting which involves you to empathize with others - tend to be the less aggressive/assertive types. I would rather have this kind of success, mostly because I'm terrible at dominating others and I don't think for a lifetime it would be that enjoyable and whilst it would give security, it would give any kind of REAL self-esteem. Hence being popular in the "cool" sense never appealed to me, although being popular in the "lots of people genuinely like me" sense is always a bonus. I think if Vanessa is going to talk about being more likable, she shouldn't lump it into the same category as "playground popularity" - as, like I said, a lot of the cool kids were secretly loathed. Assertiveness and likability are too entirely different categories (it's ideal to have both), but they need to be separated as such.

I've watched as many of her videos as I've been able to find(I love them) and just recently I started thinking about "coolness"/popularity and what distinguishes it. And boom, here's the answer, wow!

@jjh1373

7 жыл бұрын

Oh, sure"

Really nice interview.... thanks:)

no way?! you guys actually havr videos?! this is awesome.

@cheeriomartinez

7 жыл бұрын

Jordan Harbinger that's pretty awesome man. it certainly helped seeing her body language and what she was talking about.

@cheeriomartinez

7 жыл бұрын

Jordan Harbinger both.

Very interesting!

Omg great stuff.. You're both hilarious too🖤

How could one ever truly feel comfortable around someone who can read your body language and then effortlessly manipulate their own emotions to whatever they feel is appropriate? While I don't doubt Vanessa Van Edwards seems fairly pleasant, I'd say it would be hard to get to know her; the "real" her! Also, in retrospect I found that the most popular kids in school had mixed personality traits. While many were introverted and extroverted, the one characteristic they all shared was confidence. Albeit many of them had exhibited inadvertent confidence in controlling/influencing people, while the others that knew of this went on to harness their powers to ultimately become control freaks. "Confidence; the food of the wise man and the liquor of the fool!" You either have it or you don't. I personally wouldn't have the confidence to hang out with Vanessa Van Edwards and Scott Thornton Edwards in their "escape room" discussing the joys of alphabetizing.

@foekist7312

6 жыл бұрын

Greetings and salutations from Ireland Jordan. Yes mate, I sure do. Ever since Charlamagne Tha God mentioned you, I have been periodically checking in on your podcasts. Great stuff and the growth you've shown is clearly undeniable. Keep up the good work. Sláinte!

Excellent interview. I watch all of Scott's Periscopes and read his blog.

@DailyDaydreaming

7 жыл бұрын

I never heard of it before I saw this interview with Scott Adams. But I will certainly start watching it now. It looks like it's right up my alley! Keep up the great work. :)

i have orderd the book Captivate !

Tons of great content + Badass outro music!

Awesome!

If only the Shaq interview was on video too... Jordan, thank you and your team for all of your great content!

The part when she said she cursed gave me a smile, I like how she is :)

@Maplenin

7 жыл бұрын

Jordan Harbinger Just the first 5 minutes, This night I will hear some of yours, I just recently found about her and consecuently found you 👍🏻

so real :) AMAZING :D

please make caption available for this video ☺

Will you guys be presenting future episodes in video format or is this just a trial run?

Mind blown

Just want to say this was really good. I sawVanessa 1st on Lewis Howes channel, but he's terrible at editing interviews so it was trash. He edited a part where she says that saying hello to someone is a genius way to show interest + that was the whole segment!. I sub to u + pls pray that utube dont recommend Lewis's channel to me anymore XD

I'm not familiar with all her work, but what I have found with most people operating in this space is a void. Many folks were awkward and shy in HS for various reasons and have since overcome it. However, I very rarely see guests talk about how to raise children from early on in order to avoid this same awkward/shy stage.

She's fun!

Clearly there is attraction between you two, it's so noticeable! Nice interview!

My goal is to have posture half as good as Jordan's

I heard the F bomb! I love it!

Ambivert! Why have I not heard this before? This is me!

I like the video content for a change. I wonder why you were wearing your jacket, was it cold in there?

@sacstaterEVOLution

7 жыл бұрын

ikr... Show some skin! :-D

"The 'angry' hello sounds very confident"....interesting! Tough love can still be a winning tone of voice, eh?

i like vanessa

She's trying to read Jordan in this interview! Love it though 😁

@1bluehammock

7 жыл бұрын

Nfactor -Everyone tries to read anyone they engage in any conversation

I'm one of those "low open" people. So what should I do? try to pretend to be open? Is it a useless trait that no one should have?

“It’s the gland that secrets oxytocin “ get the hell away from my kids ! (Classic sir ) 😂😂

This was really cool to watch and listen to. But what if someone is genuinely mixed, as in very close Half and half when it comes to their personality and character for all of those measurable traits you've mentioned? How can someone with this type of personality deeply bond or get along with those who are one way or the other over a long period of time, whether its a friendship, relationship, coworkers, etc.? would they need more people like themselves in that regard? or something else?

aoc and vve so 👌

I really need to up my HotorNot game

Hooray for redheads.

@Big_Red_Dork

6 жыл бұрын

Amen sister, preach it!

This shit was fire

I like you a lot and stuff......no really this is awesome

As an aside I do know a little bit about body language and enjoy using that knowledge. For example in the movie Ex Machina, where the AI is tested for a pass on the Turing Test, Ava never shows Caleb the palms of her hands, which would indicate, "I have nothing to hid from you," because of course she did. At another point Ava is telling Caleb something along the lines of I don't want to make you uncomfortable but gives a tiny shake of her head indicating she lied and of course she was lying. Most interesting to me is that, I don't feel this gesture was 'directed', but was a natural human tell that the actress gave without conscious volition. The question the movie raised was, could this AI, Ava, pass the Turing Test. My question to you two is what behavior would Ava have had to display for her to pass TT for you?

anger is a byproduct of being scared how is scared being self-confident?

Why is it that i am always the only one who is akward in any room.. everyone is totally ok.. thats my big problem

Lol... the "pituitary gland" necklace idea. Might want to avoid this one Jordan.. haha. It seemed like a plausible idea at first.

I've been regular listener since the days of Pickup Podcast. D Here are some criticism about the video: 1) Interlaced video in unforgivable past 2010. 2) The set feels uncomfortable, because of award seating (chairs without back) and being close to the wall (screens). Ways to fix it: either get a small bar height coffee table, between you and the guest, or get a chair in witch you and the guest can relax and lay back(this is specially important for long interviews). When it comes to distance between subjects and background (you and the screens) - get far enough, so you do not cast a shadow and reflections on the screens. After some criticism - here are some praises: Skin tones and lighting are on point, audio is also great. One additional suggestion, that is quite non-significant: Maybe, make the background image(of the screens) to be similar to wall paint(basically, less blue). This would make the set feel even more relaxed and comfortable.

@3rdHalf1

7 жыл бұрын

That makes seance. And with existing circumstances - video is well put together. Just wanted to thank you for your podcast, that helped me, a high-school dropout geek, to get my shit together.

@3rdHalf1

7 жыл бұрын

Just recently failed my second business. Currently going to trade school learning to weld at 25. Not going to say that my current situation is rose field, but in grand scheme of things - I have nothing to complain about. For me - the only way is up.

@divinebeginnings3741

7 жыл бұрын

stay at home mom and even had those thoughts go through my head.. the posture setup being not so comfortable for a woman.. just wasn't the one to ever say it lol Good tips, and humble replies 😊 Love'n this channel!!

Ok ;) I have to hit pause at the 15 min mark here and say that your point about popularity might be as you said, a little bit fuzzy. Of course in order to be magnetic one needs to have a strong sense of who he or she is, to know how they feel and what their view are but people also have an innate ability to step into other people's shoes, to see the world through the eyes of another and try on for themselves the paradigms held by those around them. This is the essence of rapport and it might speak to your question about finding out how to like other people more. The most charismatic and popular people I have ever met were so fluid and adept at this particular skill that they could in the course of a conversation look at me and say, "Wait a minute.. Ok. You're thinking that..." and then proceed to tell me exactly what was on my mind. Or better yet look me in the eye and cause me to um... sorry. I forgot what I was gonna say. Anyway I hope that helps. ;)

Hey guys I've bin listening for about 7 years but I have extreme anxiety if anyone cn help me let me know

is gonna have veins and everything?? omgg im dead lmao

she is soooo cute

I am also an ambivert

Being on the phone all day is nothing get to brag about.

Can you repeat the things you said about the stuff. I know I was supposed to be listening, but I was too busy falling in love.

Some months ago I watched a twelve year old win America Has Talent and although I didn't think she was a great singer I wanted her to win because she was just so darn 'charming'. Following on, it occurred to me that if I could 'wish' an attribute to a child for a happy fulfilling life it would be charm, more than good looks, more than intelligence because people just want to be with and help charming people. That said it seemed that most of what was discussed today was over-thought and lacked gravitas. Allow me to make some points; I'll be very brief. -Communication, high verbal ability, can dissolve a majority of problems very quickly. It is a skill set that if you practice you can get much at it. More, of course, it is the foundation of much of what passes as charm. -How to increase verbal ability? Find on KZread "Jojo I'm not a princess". This girl is four, very verbal and can make coherent arguments. I would think this is because she has not been fed "baby-talk" but was engaged in conversation as if she were a highly intelligent entity; which children are. -Woman I met some months ago said she was very shy but upon entering a sorority in college was told that at every event she had to sit with several complete strangers and make conversation for no less than fifteen minutes. Worked for her, would think it would work for anyone. -I think you missed one very important attractant and that is 'polite but not interested'. I'm of an age now where the Great Dating Game doesn't interest me very much and low- and-behold many, many more women flirt with me than I ever had when I sought same. Ok, but the real surprise is that many are decades younger than me!? Some of this isn't exactly a surprise as I've known and many male acquaintances, over the years, knew that when you are married or have a girl friend suddenly you are much more attractive to females in general. I don't have any advice, unless it would be to try to remember and follow many of the rules promulgated in the discussion will just drive you crazy or perhaps crazier than things already are.

Leather jacket, She doesn't look all that cold??

Wow she is so mindful she even noticed that she cursed.

Great episode, only wish the host let Vanessa talk more, had less of his stories and more of hers.

The music in the begining is creepy af!

I’m offended about this guy Josh always referring to men as guys, men, but when he refers to women he refers to as first is females which is the scientific term used to differentiate gender. When we are talking about social constructs we are men and women not male and female doctor which is reserved for scientific things such as reproduction, or polls.

Vanessa please marry me

Tried really hard to find her research qualifications in social science (i.e. graduate or doctorate degree) and turns out she has an undergrad in an unrelated field. Not even an investigative journalist. Seems the title of researcher is self proclaimed. Hate that. Its deception. Why not just say, this shit fascinates me so I have spent a lot of time learning about it - like Tony Robbins says.

She seems pretty awesome but omg she needs to stop saying like so much

Marriage is under the covenant of God, till death do we part. Being married and finding out your not compatible is not grounds for divorce. It’s sad - man up and woman up and grow to serve each other’s needs. Say if you spouse has a tragic accident and it causes changes in sleep patterns personality traits. Do you leave? Hopefully not. 2 Corinthians 13:4

She's great, I think she's has such great advice and insight. I'm not too familiar with who is interviewing her, but he needs to work on his game.