WRickWrites now has his own KZread channel packed with even more stories. If you like his work, and he can write a great story! Please subscribe to his channel here: www.youtube.com/@WRickWrites-qy8pq

"we are not trapped here with you, you're trapped here with us." - Humans

The funny thing is is that we're not apex predators, or carnivorous - we're pursuit/endurance hunters and omnivorous. It's why I love these 'humans are space orcs' stories. We may not be all that fierce, but that doesn't mean we wouldn't be terrifying from an outside perspective. Plus, I'm Australian. Apparently that skews one's perspective about scary creatures.

@yvonnewilson2242

3 ай бұрын

Hell---many of us are looking at you lot and believe you are another species of human, considering all the crazy "nature" going on in your neck of the woods! Yes. I put "nature" in quotes because what goes on in your continent that's "natural" to you is definitely NOT "natural" everywhere else on this planet! 😂😂😂

@cooperreynolds5041

3 ай бұрын

we are apex predators and we are carnivorous, we're just not carnivores.

@msharp6887

3 ай бұрын

North America has it share of scary creatures

@Teth47

3 ай бұрын

We are apex predators. The title is not a hunting style, it's a position in the food web. Nothing naturally preys on us. The fact that we eat things other than meat is also irrelevant. Grizzly bears are apex predators while also being omnivorous.

@Wyld1one

3 ай бұрын

Was that a Crocodile Hunter reference? "Ooooh, okay over there it's a 500 lb Bengal tiger. Man it's a beauty. bite your head off and eat you in a moment. let me go touch his tail"

Men this story is a riot….”unfortunately for them humans don’t need complex mathematics to work out a hunting problem they do that kind of thing instinctively” oh my god I almost died 😂

@sim.frischh9781

4 ай бұрын

"VR sims where something horrifying tries to kill you and you have to kill it... they do that for FUN..." really cracked me up XD

@PurePerspicacity

4 ай бұрын

Same​@@sim.frischh9781

@furiouskaiser9914

3 ай бұрын

"Ya, we can eat anything on your ship."

@TheMonkey747

3 ай бұрын

Monke Throw Rock. 😂❤

@Senok13

3 ай бұрын

@@sim.frischh9781 You forgot the end: "They do that FOR FUN. From childhood." Yeah, it really describes our society, that our fun equals as with a combat or survival training for hypothetical alien species... Even our civilians are often more "trained" in violence, as their official military.

"The first rule of space tavle kids, is always check out distress beacons, 9 times out of 10 it's a ship full of dead aliens and a bunch of free sh*t, 1 out of 10 times it's a deadly trap, but i'm willing to roll those dice" - Smartest human in all of existence, Rick Sanchez I live by those words when playing space games

@tiredman99

2 ай бұрын

Definitely words to live by

@reyariass

2 ай бұрын

@@tiredman99when spacex starts sending civilian humans to space, I’ll keep this in mind

First impression: Well, that's just a Xenomorph. After the twist: Well played.

@Adamdidit

2 ай бұрын

They threw in a "It's the only way to be sure" too 😂

@TheSolidSnakeOil

29 күн бұрын

>just a Xenomorph Son, what universe are you from?

Having red or listened to a lot of HFY This one is especially good because it takes some weird turns and avoids a lot of the common tropes in the genre. The fact that it isn't human-centric, the fact that another species is worse but it isn't this big bad, It's all just very good and refreshing.

@sim.frischh9781

4 ай бұрын

I am not familiar with the reddit posts, may i ask really stupidly: what does HFY actually stand for? And why are humans always seemingly so overpowered and threatening entities in those stories? They are often fun, but is there a specific idea to this?

@phofire77

4 ай бұрын

@@sim.frischh9781 HFY = Humanity, Fuck Yeah! [Explosions and guitar riffs] It stems from the Humans are space orcs trope or the what if instead of xenomorphs, Klingons, predators etc. WE end up being the monsters (I am Legend). it also starts with the countering of human mundaneness. we look at all the creatures that are stronger, faster, can fly, have claws, nocturnal eyesight, and so many other advantages. But we ignore that thumbs is not by far our only advantage. Our ability to recover from massive trauma our default endurance (pursuit predation) even our pack bonding with other apex predators (and Roombas with steak knives taped to them ala Sgt stabby). further the number of poisons we consume not just willingly but excitingly (capsaicin, mint, cocoa, are my faves, coffee is for many) and it starts to show that not only are we on top of the food chain for a reason, but we are a bit crazy to boot. I used to have several great links for the intros to this, but it was in a file that got zucked on an old profile :(

@oihammon

4 ай бұрын

@@sim.frischh9781 it's "humanity, fuck yeah" and is based on the theme of humans being the other side of the scale being overpowered as shit

@midgetman4206

4 ай бұрын

@@sim.frischh9781 It's probably a result/response to humanity being portrayed as "weak" on bigger/popular titles. It also feels nice having our strengths be highlighted, and unique (since it's hard to comprehend just how different we are when all we got to compare to in the real world are just animals).

@sim.frischh9781

4 ай бұрын

@@midgetman4206 That part makes sense to me.

As a navy vet, i love this story. If there is a mariner in trouble, you stop what you are doing, and you go, and help them. end of story. There was this one time we were doing a replenishment at sea with one of our fleet's cruisers and a refueling ship. this involves all three ships moving in very tight formation and exact speeds while transfer thousands of gallons of fuel, along with food and weapon transfers being carried out by ziplines and helicopters. this all leaves the ships incredibly vulnerable; one well placed attack, and we lose three ships and crews. as such, we are nowhere near land masses, fishing areas, or traffic lanes when we do this. so imagine how surprised we were when one of our helicopters reported smoke on the horizon. the snoopy team gets dispatched by helicopter to see what's going on. they found a large disabled trawler, the crew scrambling on deck to flag down the helicopter. three of them jumped in the water. the rescue swimmer went in after them, and brought them into the helicopter. as this was happening, the helicopter was relaying it all back to our ships. we immediately broke formation -- like, took axes to the fuel transfer lines immediately -- and within minutes this trawler had two US navy ships, and one USNS supply ship circling them, with teams in helicopters and RHIBs rendering aid. They had been adrift and disabled for several days following an engine fire that also destroyed their radio. We gave them medical aid, and ferried all but a handful of them to the nearest port, with the rest (their captain included) choosing to stay on the ship and await a tow into port. we provided them with supplies for the next few days (they had run out of fresh water) and communications, as well as having contacted their company to let them know we found their guys, they were safe, and they were waiting for a tug. now, i can no longer find the news story about this, but the one i found about year after it happened didn't even mention my ship. it just said that the cruiser that was with us did everything. so i can only imagine my government didn't want people to know my ship was there for whatever reason (don't ask. i don't know. seriously, they never tell us what the hell we're doing. most of the time it's just "go to this random spot and do circles"). but despite that, and the vulnerable condition of our ships at the time, we still dropped everything to come help our fellow mariners. i would hope that is always the norm with sailors, be they on water or in the oceans of the skies.

@sim.frischh9781

4 ай бұрын

I really hope this kind of spirit will also apply once we actually venture out into space.

@apollyon2109

4 ай бұрын

I feel like it’s to insure your location isn’t given out

@bearsnevergiveup

4 ай бұрын

Do circles. Funny

@matthewbenton4767

4 ай бұрын

@@bearsnevergiveup funny but true, you get a 'patrol triangle' and 'sit and wait' orders. do that for 3 to 6 months then go home

@thehermitman822

3 ай бұрын

Good read.

"what did they eat?" Hahahaha, that was a good punch line if I ever saw one.

@edikando1574

5 ай бұрын

"it's best not to dwell on such menutiae"

@tjansson8481

4 ай бұрын

Tastes like chicken!

@Virtualblueart

3 ай бұрын

"Whatever is on board" wasn't the most tactical answer from the humans either 😂

@dsandstrom93

3 ай бұрын

It would be fun if they DID eat some of them just to stay alive, and then noticing that they taste like a mix of beef and mutton.

@tdogtexan3445

Ай бұрын

it would be even more fun if they grabbed a few of the greedy little guys as a snack for the trip back.

I have to admit,I love a universe where humans are the most physically powerful species

@jerometruitt2731

3 ай бұрын

That may be the case in our universe too...

@Krane5328

3 ай бұрын

most animals on earth are physically superior to humans. Normal house cats can run almost twice as fast as Usaine Bolt. Humans are min maxing to have higher stats in intelligence and endurance. So aliens would more likely have a dynamic of being smart just like us, but then being better than us in some other trait but not having our endurance. But it's alien life so we can only speculate. @@jerometruitt2731

@excelself

3 ай бұрын

@@jerometruitt2731it is if not we can beat them with numbers.

@thecursed01

3 ай бұрын

@@jerometruitt2731 doubt it. even here on earth our weight to strength ration is abyssmal. but that opens way to other hilarious situations. we developed weapons becasue we are weak. and fragile. we can't punch something hard becasue our skin would burst. super stupid design. so we had an arms race for weapons and armor for millenias. imagine an aggressive alien race that evolved from pure predators. who may develop tech for space travel and all that, but no sense of military arsenals. becasue when they invade, they just land with massive armies and swarm out to fight with their claws/mandibles/horns whatever. so imagine the reaction of an army of 10000 victory sure aliens after learning human physiology, standing on earth waiting for the battle... and get obliteraded by an airstrike and a couple of vehicles with minuguns and mortars. and some bored radio tech yawns and gives the report: invasion obliterated. no losses. as usual. that's the 3rd predatory alien invasion this year. i wonder what's for lunch in the mess hall today...

@jerometruitt2731

3 ай бұрын

@thecursed01 yes its abysmal when compared to animals. Maybe weaker bodies are an evolutionary byproduct of having higher intelligence which is clearly far more valuable than physical strength. Grizzlies aren't building skyscrapers and traveling to the moon.

16:48 mf really used the steam notification sound, had me checking my messages.

@johnparks4345

3 ай бұрын

Came to find this comment

@westvirginian3102

3 ай бұрын

I had to close Steam so I would quit checking if it was a message.

@Tscheche89

3 ай бұрын

I feel ya - had even check that I didnt imagine it and revert back ^^

@ParanoidCarrot

2 ай бұрын

@@johnparks4345 yeah god damit

@NyxtoX6

2 ай бұрын

Same bro I also thought there was a update or some new discount deals

The second hand power Fantasy feeling I get from this is incredible. To be from a world considered extremely hostile and to be considered incredibly dangerous physically and mentally. And then to be set lose on a weak little villian population. Man that's every teenagers dream in a new coat of paint. We all day dreamed about combat at some point

@SirMarshalHaig

2 ай бұрын

Like in Deadpool 2 mentioned "I wish we´d stumble across a planet where they´re all worse than us in every way" or so was the sentence.

Stat'staan survivor: "In space, no one can hear you scream."

@CalebC.Quarles

3 ай бұрын

I could imagine that this incident would make for their species equivalent of the Aliens movies.

@Jumpton

3 ай бұрын

Except for your 49 traveling buddies.

@TheSolidSnakeOil

3 ай бұрын

@@CalebC.Quarles When they broke of the beeping scanner, I went, ALIENS!

@aukima771

2 ай бұрын

"they're coming outta the gooddan walls​"@@TheSolidSnakeOil

Oh man, the sound effects are making me twitch to keep checking my phone. Law of the Sea. You dont leave a sailor stranded, regardless of anything else. The sea is doing everything it can to kill you at a moments notice, you dont need to make it easier to do. Even more true in space.

@phofire77

4 ай бұрын

I'm a security supervisor and I kept checking to make sure my people were okay and weren't sending me important messages

@SankyEON

4 ай бұрын

That's the old Steam message sound. I was thinking someone was trying to scam me out of my CSGO items.

@nicholasroach880

4 ай бұрын

​@@phofire77Same here lol

The Statston morality description is the best description for lawful evil in D&D I've ever heard.

Let his fruit punch ferment a little too long... That is a great one.

This got way scarier than it was meant to! I was listening to it while showering in the middle of the night, and during the search for the doctor, I had my eyes closed while washing my hair, and my cat woke up and started playing, making weird creepy sounds right outside the door! And she banged loudly into a door literally right as the captain opened the hatch and saw the second creature!

@SovietReunionYT

3 ай бұрын

Also, stellar story, I love it!

@kennethohnemus3192

3 ай бұрын

Kitty wants to hear the story too LOL

It's like their species is trying to be a hive mind despite them not having that kind of capabilities.

The description of Video games had me laughing. Great little story and well narrated however that is done. Makes me want to write a short story.

@iulianb

5 ай бұрын

Extremely violent video games? Fun playing for kids, nothing more...

@chunglow7646

4 ай бұрын

Likely akin to playing Cowboy wid the ole Cap gun Using rolls of Dots having an explosive powder in for the Cap pistol Hammer to crush. ​@@iulianb

@tamilnadu8545

3 ай бұрын

Go for it!

Excellent story and writing. It has the feel of mid -1950s stories from Astounding Stories Science Fiction.

@maxwill6408

3 ай бұрын

Yes, it does and Astounding Stories was one of the many magazines I would read when I was a kid.

Humans are always going to be the last men standing. Mainly because our allies are an alternative food source.

A real gem of a story, and so worth listening to! Thankyou for this!!

Just because one masters the concept of combat doesnt mean they like it or want it! Those who understand will go a mile around conflict but if they are pressed into it they will strike to end it. But they will not be happy about having to go that route. God bless all!! Ssg H.

that's the quirk of our evolution, we gained intelligence first and then became an apex species second. this is why we are so efficient in applying our might

There's a famous essay that explains the most dangerous person to work with is the stupid. The most stupid person is one that values groupthink.

@xomox5316

4 ай бұрын

can confirm, worked with a very dumb electrician that should have never been hired, he almost ended himself multiple times and had to be physically stopped by multiple other electricians from getting his hand blown off or worst. Nothing worst because no amount of training or explaining can help the stupid because once that are in front of something new they dont have the sense to apply previous lessons.

@lucianfrostbane

Ай бұрын

The intelligence of a mob is the square root of its members

This was really funny. I was able to guess they had encountered humans; and when it was revealed, the story became even more humorous.

It's nice hearing a truly alien story.

@thehermitman822

3 ай бұрын

And then you find out the monster.

Those xenos were lucky it was a civilian human trading ship and not a military vessel...

@G-13720

3 ай бұрын

Would've been like the Astartes plowing through unarmed Tau

@viirinsoftworks1304

3 ай бұрын

Or an emergency relief shipment.

@leolordful

3 ай бұрын

Operation:praying mantis all over again

@Spaceinvader2020

19 күн бұрын

Some more of them were exmilitary

Plot twist: There was 35 Humans. One stayed behind because they killed his wife and daughter.

As someone else said, this thing was an absolute riot! Straight to my top ten scifi shorts I've ever heard!

Human No.1 4 day's in on the Stat'staan ship: so how's it taste? Human No.2: like chicken.

@lucianfrostbane

Ай бұрын

Looks like chicken tastes like fish

I love everything of it and like my *Human* Mandalorian Roleplay Character love to say "Its no cannibalism if they not Humans."

One of the better HFY offerings.

I've been on a marathon of these stories and i have to say, this is definitely one of the better ones. Interesting, funny, and a power fantasy without being too cringy. Well done

I think it's a "Alien Xenomorph" story

@Brakvash

5 ай бұрын

Alien Homomorph

@DezzarTac

5 ай бұрын

@@Brakvash snrk "They come out at night" "Who?" "The homomorphs" [closet door opens in the dead of night] "I'm gay" *rimshot*

What did they eat? Humans: FEAST UPON OUR ENEMIES

Man, this is my first story from his channel and i was a little thrown off by the AI voice but therrs so much i love about this story. It breaks a lot of common tropes from stoeies like this. Its not just human focused, it explains things really well like and makes call backs to previous notes in tbe story that fit well together like the ship dismantling and why the humans couldn't leave. Its also just funny and has a great story and message. Looking forward to more!

I love this story. My favorite part was the bit about the video game 🤣🤣🤣 eat fruit like a normal person 🤣🤣🤣

That's a great short story! I love how it went from a suspense mystery to a horror story to a comedy to a heartwarming ending.

What a great story!!! I was actually laughing at the end with the empty space suit practical joke! And also the not so subtle hint on what the humans ate during all that time. Brilliant story!

This was awesome, I've been listening to HFY stories for a few weeks now and I believe this is one of the best I've heard.

@scifistories1977

Ай бұрын

Wrickwrites is pretty awesome. He's written many stories, and you can find a playlist with them all in, in the description above.

Humans ate xeno- steak. I am sure!

@proudamerican183

4 ай бұрын

Down here, we have chicken legs and wings. Up there, they had xeno legs and arms. 😂😂😂

A Total Blast! Most entertaining thing I’ve listened to in a month of Sundays!

Good story, kudos to the author.

this was an fantastic HFY story on so many levels

Damn this a good story. And i feel like its realistic without being cliche. I liked it.

This is my favorite HFY story yet

A very refreshing and fun story to listen to! "What did they eat?" 😂 A perfect ending! Thank you very much!

@CortexNewsService

3 ай бұрын

I laughed out loud at that.

This was so entertaining loved it from beginning to end, now it’s time for some southern fried chicken, lol.

- Venting - Picking off crewmates Yeah, we humans are Impostors. Damn good ones too. This is basically a practical application of Amogus. 🤣

That was truly one of the best shorts I've listened to. Very well done.

I loved the first story except that humans seemed a bit too technologically advanced for having "poor FTL" and a galaxy without carnivores seems highly unlikely....but reading this, I actually got to love the idea of a galaxy full of "dumb" herbis, with a few exceptions (basically any species that understands humor).

This was a great listen. Sounds like a random encouter straight out of Stellaris 😂

This story was such a surprise! I had no idea right up until the end. What a great story!

Roh damn this was hilarious and marvelously narrated. Big up for the numerous birdy references. Happy new year !

Very enjoyable. Especially loved the ending

You have the best voice of all the narrator's I've heard

@homoerectus6953

5 ай бұрын

its an AI. But its a really good one, and agree its one of my favourites

Listening to this for Stellaris inspiration.

Damn, this is funny and horrifying. Making humans turn into some kind of cosmic alien for the sake of survival. A monster lurking under your bed.

This would make a good movie.

The ship looks like an Eagle from the sci-fi show space 1999

This is the best scifi story i have listened to so far. All the rest have been horribly ai narrated repetitive and yea over exaggeratedly repetitive. This was damn near perfection. The joking nature was refreshingly human lol i need more from this story teller.

That bit at 16:50 had me wondering who was sending me a message and hearing it again made realise it was the video and not Steam.

This story was just what the dr. ordered. Deep fried funny.😂 thanks for that! 🤝

This one earned my sub, good story!

This was great, and humorous too.

Omg this is great stuff. The final polish is again fantastic

Another great story to listen to. Truly im enjoying binge listening to the series. 💪🏻🙏🏻✨

You're doing a great job. Keep it up. This is the way

Great story, love the narrator, great script .

Great story, great narrator, great artwork.

@Saucychemist

5 ай бұрын

Ummm, that's an ai narrator fyi

@Echowhiskeyone

5 ай бұрын

@@Saucychemist Yep, amazing how much better AI speech is getting. It is still flat and disjointed, but much better and only getting netter.

Just found this type of story line ! It’s great !

Got to love when youtube give you non-visual content. I mean that in a good way, shows that writing stories isn't a lost art, we need more of us (i am writer, though have hit sort of huge case of the infamous block).

Excellent story. Thanks so much for posting.

I openly laughed out loud at Boss level battle... kill kill kill

I really really liked this! To more of these!

Fantastic! Cheers.

That was brilliant. Loved the story.

I mean it was obvious from the beginning that humans will be in the story directly not just like a random mention in the beginning but... yeah, I like this author quite a bit.

What an awesome story - I loved it!

This is absolutely amazing story. The narration is great, plot simply fantastic, details thoughtful and author knowledge leads to amazing details...I absolutely loved it!

Very good story with a Great ending.

16:47 you legit threw me off with the "Steam notification" sound effect. :P

Great story!

What a great story. I really enjoyed it.

Man im crying due to all the laughter 🤣

Sounds like they're trying to play a little game of "Alien" like from the '79 movie.

Wonderful!

Fun listen! Thanks

I loved this story ❤❤❤

Alien isolation: revenge of the humans Also did anyone else imagine the beep from the alien isolation motion tracker when the scanner went off?

@scifistories1977

2 ай бұрын

Yes, I do, but some people also think it's their steam notification going off!

First thought... Humans, when i read the title.

@lower48rcconstruction91

5 ай бұрын

They don't like us very much these humans but they do need us more than anyone else😊

This was great! Laughed so much.

How the hell did the Stat'staan ever become a space faring race

this was a good series and story thanks

That was excellent.

Love the content was listening on tiktok but rather listen here keep up the good work

Fantastic!

Listening to this made me imagine that the Stat'staans are just dumber versions of Minions of Gru and the Amias are like Dodo birds with multiple limbs

Ohhh yes !! I just finished my morning run had shower made coffee and this waiting for me 💪🤠🍻