The Tweet Song - Tim Hawkins & Jonnie W.

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Пікірлер: 269

  • @ckmoore101
    @ckmoore1012 жыл бұрын

    "People who don't believe in autocorrect, go straight to heal". Damn, that is an unbelievably great juke.

  • @POLITIMICOST

    @POLITIMICOST

    Жыл бұрын

    probably meant to spell "heel"

  • @calebhunter7440

    @calebhunter7440

    Жыл бұрын

    I figured it was "he'll"

  • @blurdrawsart
    @blurdrawsart2 жыл бұрын

    “And Sauron’s not gonna be happy happy happy.” I died 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @joeskis
    @joeskis Жыл бұрын

    Making Steven Wright and Mitch Hedberg proud. They might even be jealous they hadn't thought of some of these.

  • @PhantomLantern2814
    @PhantomLantern28148 ай бұрын

    I love how Tim keeps cracking up at Jonnies bits.

  • @pietvanvliet1987
    @pietvanvliet1987 Жыл бұрын

    Second uncle joke got me. Hats off sir, hats off.

  • @basedbear1605
    @basedbear16052 жыл бұрын

    Judas is a carrot... omg I'm dying!

  • @jamesedgar3442
    @jamesedgar34428 жыл бұрын

    "If you're illiterate, you probably live your life by a set of unwritten rules." I LOVE IT!!!!!!

  • @thechickengamer4279

    @thechickengamer4279

    5 жыл бұрын

    Wyft dyu sy

  • @brendasmith4524

    @brendasmith4524

    4 жыл бұрын

    James Edgar god bless you James edgar.

  • @richardlloyd2589

    @richardlloyd2589

    2 жыл бұрын

    For fun….. If you’re an improv actor you probably live your life by unwritten roles.

  • @SingingSpock
    @SingingSpock Жыл бұрын

    Recently the inventor of the Hokey Pokey passed away. Took forever to get him into his coffin, though. They put the left leg in an that’s where the trouble started.

  • @cedgson91
    @cedgson91 Жыл бұрын

    Judas is a carrot 😂😂😂😂

  • @sherimcdaniel3491
    @sherimcdaniel34913 жыл бұрын

    “Good friends are like fine wine, that’s why I keep mine locked in the cellar!!!!” HAHAHAHAHA. I should know better by now than to take a drink just before it’s Tims’ turn!!! Now I’ll have to repaint the wall opposite my bed.

  • @richardlloyd2589

    @richardlloyd2589

    3 жыл бұрын

    Ah the joys of getting older, used to be the wall behind the bed.

  • @tyrelhumble2006

    @tyrelhumble2006

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@richardlloyd2589 Please explain

  • @richardlloyd2589

    @richardlloyd2589

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@tyrelhumble2006 Without being too graphic, think being single and teenaged.

  • @knowledgetracker
    @knowledgetracker4 жыл бұрын

    Their dry delivery is hilarious!

  • @michaelvantuinen9216

    @michaelvantuinen9216

    3 жыл бұрын

    I didn’t get the Lego joke can somebody help me out

  • @knowledgetracker

    @knowledgetracker

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@michaelvantuinen9216 - LEGO's are little square plastic blocks that kids (or adults) use to build little buildings with.

  • @richardlloyd2589

    @richardlloyd2589

    2 жыл бұрын

    It’s from practice at delivering Dad jokes.

  • @cedgson91
    @cedgson91 Жыл бұрын

    People you don’t believe in autocorrect go straight to heel 😂😂😂😂

  • @emeraldryder3496
    @emeraldryder34967 жыл бұрын

    I love how Tim's just showing off in between jokes

  • @georgesitar4397
    @georgesitar43975 жыл бұрын

    Never make snow angels in a dog park.

  • @kwiechufithu
    @kwiechufithu5 жыл бұрын

    Jonnie's pun are epic. My favorite - "conjoined twin...uncle from my father's side...once removed "😂

  • @larenahildebrand748

    @larenahildebrand748

    8 ай бұрын

    Love to laugh. Thanks guys!

  • @HousBinPhartiin
    @HousBinPhartiin Жыл бұрын

    Awesome!

  • @PrincessLorie
    @PrincessLorie5 жыл бұрын

    Watching this at 5am in bed and trying not to laugh and wake up my husband... so I just keep snorting. Y'all are just too funny, I love your clean humor. Thank you. ❤️

  • @900milesfromnormal3

    @900milesfromnormal3

    2 жыл бұрын

    Try being me. I'm watching at work and trying not to laugh...when I answer the phone...at the local hospital...and the caller is literally crying in pain.

  • @Runescope
    @Runescope3 жыл бұрын

    I'm an atheist and "Judas Isacarrot" is pure gold comedy.

  • @twicebitten260
    @twicebitten2604 жыл бұрын

    Lost all my family on 12/23 4 years ago, so this is a tough time of year for me......just found this and needed it. Badly

  • @annek1226

    @annek1226

    4 жыл бұрын

    Hang in there. We will say a prayer!

  • @dukezilla3471

    @dukezilla3471

    2 ай бұрын

    God is closest to those in grief 🙏

  • @PatriotMomof5
    @PatriotMomof52 жыл бұрын

    When I’m feeling down I watch Tim!! Makes me laugh and before I know it I’m feeling joyful!!

  • @sandraglover2681
    @sandraglover2681 Жыл бұрын

    My husband passed away in January this year, today is his birthday. Very emotional day today but Lord thank goodness for Tim Hawkins and his friends. I can always count on y'all to bring laughter and joy to this old girl's heart. Merry Christmas y'all

  • @theskinnypost

    @theskinnypost

    Жыл бұрын

    Praying for you now. I'm sorry for your loss. May God bless you with His peace.

  • @ittybittykittymama7582

    @ittybittykittymama7582

    Жыл бұрын

    Hi, Sandra, I hope that your heart is healing from your loss. I, too, lost the love of my life in 2009 and it took a while to find my footing again. In time, I allowed the love of God to break through the wall of pain around my heart. I found a scripture that said when you are widowed, He will be your husband. I came to lean on Him and allow Him to fill that place in my life. I hope that you can find this place of peace and healing. Much love from Tennessee. Becca

  • @sandraglover2681

    @sandraglover2681

    Жыл бұрын

    Healing is slow but daily through Christ. Thanking all for your prayers. gg in Tennessee

  • @annabennett5521

    @annabennett5521

    Жыл бұрын

    I'm so sorry for your loss 😢😢, I'm praying for you 🙏

  • @ahwheen

    @ahwheen

    Жыл бұрын

    Sorry Sandra for your loss ♡

  • @ghostofthebravegaming5393
    @ghostofthebravegaming53936 жыл бұрын

    I would tell a joke about memory loss, but I forgot it!

  • @debmeder7127
    @debmeder7127 Жыл бұрын

    I enjoyed your song 🤩

  • @IanHulett
    @IanHulett7 жыл бұрын

    Here's an old joke for a new tweet song: "They had trouble burrying the creator of the hokey pokey... he was burried with his left foot in and his right foot out."

  • @gwendaduffield721

    @gwendaduffield721

    5 жыл бұрын

    Hopefully it's over I hate making videos 6

  • @richardlloyd2589

    @richardlloyd2589

    5 жыл бұрын

    I heard the funeral was a very sombre affair, open casket etc. But when the pall bearers tripped on the steps to the church, the fun really started.......

  • @johnw2026

    @johnw2026

    4 жыл бұрын

    Y'all are going to heel... Lol!

  • @annek1226

    @annek1226

    4 жыл бұрын

    OMG! Stop! My sides hurt!

  • @sherimcdaniel3491

    @sherimcdaniel3491

    3 жыл бұрын

    420 Magnifique HILARIOUS!!!!!!! (I must say, thanks so much for planting that damn song in my head. Now I’ll have to live with it singing happily in my head-ALL DAY!)

  • @christiannorton9400
    @christiannorton940010 жыл бұрын

    "retweet"? GENIUS! rofl

  • @yaynemyers394
    @yaynemyers3947 жыл бұрын

    They found him in-between the couch cushions!

  • @carolynssistercantcook1181
    @carolynssistercantcook11812 жыл бұрын

    Judas is a carrot! I lost it

  • @barrettdecutler8979
    @barrettdecutler89794 жыл бұрын

    Props to Tim for taking the much harder guitar part.

  • @spaceturtlemusic801
    @spaceturtlemusic8016 жыл бұрын

    this could also be titled " almost 9 minutes of dad jokes"

  • @brentbennett2796

    @brentbennett2796

    5 жыл бұрын

    Dad jokes are awesome

  • @richardlloyd2589

    @richardlloyd2589

    3 жыл бұрын

    My work colleagues call them punishment.

  • @kolenowacki7638
    @kolenowacki76388 жыл бұрын

    I have a "he who does not believe in auto correct go straight to he'll" Tee signed by both Tim and Jonny!!!!

  • @liquidsleepgames3661

    @liquidsleepgames3661

    5 жыл бұрын

    Oh go to help

  • @MegaGermanShepherds

    @MegaGermanShepherds

    4 жыл бұрын

    Yet sometimes autocorrect is not always helpful because it gives wrong words part of the time.

  • @j.d.wilkes7189
    @j.d.wilkes71897 ай бұрын

    I heard that a scarecrow got promoted, because he was outstanding in his field.

  • @10kosukeueki01
    @10kosukeueki014 ай бұрын

    Never thought id see these two together lol

  • @jq8974
    @jq8974 Жыл бұрын

    Vegitales adding a character who betrayed Jesus. Please call him Judas is a Carrot!🥕 Unbelievable! You rock. Where have you been hiding? Keep going 👍 - we need you to help us ride this crazy time!

  • @lisagrafitti1871
    @lisagrafitti18715 жыл бұрын

    I thought I was going to shut my computer down and ran across this. I have seen Tim Hawkins twice and almost peed my pants up the aisle laughing so hard.

  • @bobmistark3836
    @bobmistark38364 жыл бұрын

    Thanks for the laughs.

  • @keepsaker548
    @keepsaker5485 жыл бұрын

    I'm more of a KFC fighter.... LOL

  • @Chaplain_GM
    @Chaplain_GM2 жыл бұрын

    If you meet a rancher who's jolly chances are he's growing pot😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤦‍♂️

  • @lindalape8493
    @lindalape8493 Жыл бұрын

    Laughing out loud at this. Too funny and clever!

  • @TheRealDrJoey
    @TheRealDrJoey3 жыл бұрын

    This is a slice of the sublime.

  • @ironmandave3000
    @ironmandave30006 жыл бұрын

    funny funny funny. just Twisted enough for my sense of humor.

  • @goaway4236
    @goaway42366 жыл бұрын

    I'm a Lord of the Rings and Duck Dynasty fan so when I heard that one tweet I was like, "HAHAHAHAHAHA...nope."

  • @brianmccarthy5657
    @brianmccarthy5657 Жыл бұрын

    Tim and Jonnie together is more than twice as much of way too much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • @Fox1nDen
    @Fox1nDen5 жыл бұрын

    lego land joke was a sleeper.... hilarious

  • @terriecalamusa9303
    @terriecalamusa9303 Жыл бұрын

    These are some funny guys!!!!!! 😁

  • @gypsyrain369
    @gypsyrain3692 ай бұрын

    THANK YOU FOR THIS PAIRING ! Loved You Guys TOGETHER , CRACK ME UP ! BRILLIANT ! That's A RETWEET 🤣

  • @katherineguidry8435
    @katherineguidry84359 жыл бұрын

    Whenever I want to be alone I go the the mall and hold a clipboard!!!!

  • @messyroomstudios1989
    @messyroomstudios19898 жыл бұрын

    I like the one about the guy who invented the TV remote!

  • @jeannetteurena1223

    @jeannetteurena1223

    7 жыл бұрын

    he was found dead in between his sofa

  • @izregistered
    @izregistered Жыл бұрын

    Fantastic humor we all need

  • @sicariius7682
    @sicariius76827 жыл бұрын

    Old MacDonald was dyslexic o-i-e-i-e

  • @gregschaper5807
    @gregschaper58073 жыл бұрын

    "Judas is a carrot" Oh my God funny.

  • @difficultjourney3216

    @difficultjourney3216

    3 жыл бұрын

    I don't think God thinks it's funny.

  • @shilohstore6086

    @shilohstore6086

    3 жыл бұрын

    English is not my first language why is that funny

  • @difficultjourney3216

    @difficultjourney3216

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@shilohstore6086 Judas's surname "Iscariot" sounds a little like "is a carrot" in English. Only a luke- warm/carnal Christian would find that funny though. Judas betrayed the Son of God and is now being tormented in hell for eternity. Nothing I would joke about.

  • @gregschaper5807

    @gregschaper5807

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@difficultjourney3216 You must still be worshipping the Old Testament od that had no sense of humor and went around smiting everyone. I believe the New Testament God finds it quite funny. Smart people like puns. Maybe there's a reason that you don't.

  • @difficultjourney3216

    @difficultjourney3216

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@gregschaper5807 You're not even a Christian. You're a gnostic.

  • @attayalafayette155
    @attayalafayette1553 жыл бұрын

    "That's not the joke ma'am"

  • @valnpaulvanorden
    @valnpaulvanordenАй бұрын

    10 years later...no malls left hardly!

  • @noneofyourbusiness5626
    @noneofyourbusiness56262 жыл бұрын

    He makes me laugh without saying anything

  • @maskandvaccinefreeandproud2110
    @maskandvaccinefreeandproud21102 жыл бұрын

    I wonder what their first run through is like when they havnt heard each other’s tweet. Lol!

  • @nancyhowell4505

    @nancyhowell4505

    Ай бұрын

    *haven't 🙂

  • @marybarrett146
    @marybarrett1466 жыл бұрын

    these guys are hillarios!!!!

  • @maskandvaccinefreeandproud2110
    @maskandvaccinefreeandproud21102 жыл бұрын

    This was absolutely brilliant. Wow. 🤣

  • @EmmaKnickerbocker
    @EmmaKnickerbocker9 жыл бұрын

    I`m going to heel for laughing at the conjoined twins one too early as well.

  • @thenerdherd9038

    @thenerdherd9038

    7 жыл бұрын

    He'll*

  • @jl_studios
    @jl_studios9 жыл бұрын

    Old McDonald was dyslexic, O-I-E-I-E!!!! Hahahahahahahahahahaha priceless

  • @KaRLa66626

    @KaRLa66626

    9 жыл бұрын

    I LOVE THAT ONE! And also the man who invented the television remote. ^_^

  • @prodigalthinker
    @prodigalthinker11 жыл бұрын

    Judas is a carrot.. BWAHAHAHA!!!!

  • @arianayavny8271
    @arianayavny82713 жыл бұрын

    The jokes are even funnier when they laugh at their one jokes

  • @gabesmom29

    @gabesmom29

    Жыл бұрын

    I’m thinking a few of the jokes they just came up with on the fly. It is funnier when they crack up at their own jokes.

  • @nancyhowell4505

    @nancyhowell4505

    Ай бұрын

    *own jokes (?) 🙂

  • @jerry-cw9yw
    @jerry-cw9yw Жыл бұрын

    that was horrible! almost, no, did bring me to tears.....perfect delivery, great job

  • @lyndaadams7097
    @lyndaadams70972 жыл бұрын

    Laughed so much thank you guys.

  • @shauni..
    @shauni..5 жыл бұрын

    That’s not the joke mam.. you gotta lot of nerve 😂😂🤣

  • @deepbluefyre777

    @deepbluefyre777

    5 жыл бұрын

    That deadpan facial expression. 🤣🤣🤣

  • @shauni..

    @shauni..

    5 жыл бұрын

    Shadras9 yes!! That’s what took me out 😂

  • @melanne7901
    @melanne7901 Жыл бұрын

    Another funny one about Johnnie's conjoined twin father, is if they were named Pete and RePete.

  • @kaiga1
    @kaiga15 жыл бұрын

    hahaha i enjoyed this way more than i was expecting to

  • @mariecrouse3879
    @mariecrouse38797 жыл бұрын

    I love it

  • @AmyMFry
    @AmyMFry7 жыл бұрын

    I liked "Judas Iscarrot"

  • @apersonfoundinyeshua529

    @apersonfoundinyeshua529

    4 жыл бұрын

    Amy M. Fry wow I didn’t understand until you said that lol

  • @pappy451
    @pappy4516 жыл бұрын

    damn Tim can play . a retweet he says , lmao . the best one was the last one . . .

  • @ScottCheatham
    @ScottCheatham4 жыл бұрын

    How come I've never seen this one? This is awesome!

  • @timothymcdonald6913
    @timothymcdonald69136 жыл бұрын

    JUST FUNNY!!! Thank You Both!!!!

  • @laurieboyette9569
    @laurieboyette9569Ай бұрын

    That’s genius!!!

  • @grantjudy9733
    @grantjudy97335 жыл бұрын

    this is awesome

  • @anthonytalks7018
    @anthonytalks70185 жыл бұрын

    Awesome God bless

  • @gilbertg7
    @gilbertg7 Жыл бұрын

    I'm not American and English is not my first language.But I understood everything except the first tweet. Could a charitable soul please explain it to me?

  • @melmac15

    @melmac15

    Жыл бұрын

    Sure. The pun is between “Mull it Over” (a phrase meaning to think about something over a period of time) and “Mullet Over” (‘mullet’ is a hair style where it’s short up front and long in the back-being here attributed to ‘Red-necks’.) Hope that helps some.

  • @gilbertg7

    @gilbertg7

    Жыл бұрын

    @@melmac15 Thanks

  • @blazenjj2439
    @blazenjj24395 жыл бұрын

    My Uncle on My Father's Side, My Uncle Once Removed

  • @ericsantiago2746
    @ericsantiago27464 жыл бұрын

    Great tune guys

  • @saeedbowman555
    @saeedbowman5555 жыл бұрын

    one of my favourites was the retweet one lmmmmaaoo brilliant :") cause everone was like... "oh.... ha ha...." at first loooool

  • @Darin-USMCB--
    @Darin-USMCB--6 жыл бұрын

    Good stuff

  • @Haggart9
    @Haggart93 жыл бұрын

    The Retweet joke got me really good.

  • @peacelovetennis10
    @peacelovetennis104 жыл бұрын

    They found in between the couch cushions!! Haha

  • @luisamador8460
    @luisamador84602 жыл бұрын

    My favorite part is the retweet joke

  • @joykrismanits300
    @joykrismanits3007 жыл бұрын

    I like it

  • @TheChazaqingdude
    @TheChazaqingdude7 жыл бұрын

    That was a retweet. LOL

  • @feat.shanika
    @feat.shanika4 жыл бұрын

    4:00 🤣🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 yes!!!

  • @terryheasley7027
    @terryheasley70275 жыл бұрын

    I just discovered you...you're grrreat!!

  • @ricksmith7631
    @ricksmith76315 жыл бұрын

    omg, i was late for work because i had to see this

  • @greendaleforever
    @greendaleforever5 жыл бұрын

    This should have been called "Dad Jokes"

  • @barryschwarz

    @barryschwarz

    5 жыл бұрын

    It should have been called "Awesome Dad jokes."

  • @JDL0111
    @JDL01119 жыл бұрын

    that was good

  • @robertswelch
    @robertswelch2 жыл бұрын

    This is so hilarious 🤣

  • @Natureman-yx9zq
    @Natureman-yx9zq2 жыл бұрын

    😍😜😁✌️✌️🤟rock on tim

  • @breathoflife7436
    @breathoflife74363 жыл бұрын

    Couldn't find my middle ringer

  • @4GodLoves
    @4GodLoves5 жыл бұрын

    "If you're illiterate, you probably live your life by a list of unwritten rules"... HA!

  • @alekssan1694
    @alekssan16942 жыл бұрын

    Frisbee golf = Disc golf = ♡ ♡ ♡

  • @michaelvantuinen9216
    @michaelvantuinen92163 жыл бұрын

    I love the veggie tales one then the weed jolly rancher one.

  • @glewman
    @glewman5 жыл бұрын

    Jolly Rancher pot joke , Jolly Rancher founded in Colorado.

  • @Dan-sb2fb
    @Dan-sb2fb3 жыл бұрын

    i’m totally stealing a bunch of tim’s guitar licks

  • @chaplinctbeer6781
    @chaplinctbeer67812 жыл бұрын

    That's dam fun

  • @lisamcbride8921
    @lisamcbride89212 жыл бұрын

    Old Mac Donald was dyslexic…….o i e I e! So funny

  • @Rassilon6
    @Rassilon6Ай бұрын

    Wow, people really loved the Judas joke. True story: A friend once asked me if I ever noticed that the preacher at our church couldn't pronounce Iscariot correctly; he always said Is-a-carrot. I hadn't noticed. The next Sunday, he did an entire sermon about Judas Is-a-carrot. That was the toughest time I've ever had trying to suppress the giggles during church.

  • @mickjager5974
    @mickjager59742 жыл бұрын

    Those were all very funny

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