A man was served inferior Hashbrowns, and you're laughing at him. How could you be so cruel?

@EvolvedWizard

Жыл бұрын

This guy gets it.

@BlackCatTopHat

Жыл бұрын

I mean have you DD hash browns? They are absolutely superior! 😂

@suave319

Жыл бұрын

You're laughing. We're being served inferior hashbrowns and you're laughing.

@JoeHeine

10 ай бұрын

Worse than waterboarding

@AfricanLionBat

9 ай бұрын

​@@JoeHeineworse than being beheaded by ISIS

"Monday's meeting we'll discuss further destabilization of the Middle East. Tuesday we discuss the Pepsi dispenser in the cafeteria."

@AwesomeIan135

2 жыл бұрын

“Ugh, why are we waiting until Tuesday to discuss the Pepsi dispenser? Can we push back the destabilizing of the Middle East and focus on the important issues at hand?”

@lopanreturns7085

2 жыл бұрын

@@danjoredd Are you sure your finger didn’t slip?

@lopanreturns7085

2 жыл бұрын

@@danjoredd Machines don’t make mistakes like that.

@Commrade-DOGE

2 жыл бұрын

@@danjoredd why is the vending machine full of lays chips? We are on the east coast… we need UTZ

@louiscypher4186

2 жыл бұрын

​@@AwesomeIan135 We already pushed Destabilization back a week due to staff shortages resulting from the last food fight and the Oman team needs us to finalize the details for NSA drone mission over Yemen before the Muscat Festival, Just buy a can from the vending machine for a day.

Typical CIA schedule 7:30AM - Breakfast ay Langley cafeteria 8:00AM - clock in 8:05AM - file complaint about breakfast 8:45AM - Coffee Break 8:50AM - file complaint about coffee 9:00AM - Browse 4chan 9:30AM - petition for warrant to shitpost on 4chan 10:30AM - shitpost on 4chan 11:30AM - file complaint about 4chan 12:00PM - Lunch at Langley cafeteria 1:00PM - sell fentanyl to finance regime change in Middle East 1:30PM - file complaint about lunch 2:00PM - check voicemail 2:30PM - check status of breakfast complaint 3:00PM - web training 3:30PM - browse reddit 4:00PM - petition for warrant to shitpost on reddit 4:30PM - shitpost on reddit 4:45PM - complete daily activity report 4:50PM - redact daily activity report 4:55PM - file complaint about downvotes on reddit 5:00PM - clock out

@Prototheria

Жыл бұрын

I don't work for the CIA but I do work for the government, and this is pretty goddamn spot on. I'm printing it out tomorrow and posting it around the work area. Congrats; you're now on a watch list.

@violinmerchant

Жыл бұрын

@@Prototheria enjoy the show feds, and please consider donating to my patreon.

@pimas11

Жыл бұрын

7:40 AM - remove feathers and flies from chicken and replace tomato with grape

@luiul1

Жыл бұрын

@@Prototheria which is longer? those on a watch list, or those not on a watch list? why do i ask?

@luiul1

Жыл бұрын

that seemed to come out a wee bit too easily for you.

To shed a little bit of light on the CIA cafeteria situation, the contractors they hire to stock and run the food service at most Federal Government facilities are the lowest bidder, who also need to provide staff who can pass a background check and obtain a security clearance to work in the building, especially the Pentagon and CIA headquarters. Which means the contact company is going to do everything in their power to cut costs & labor to come in under their bid. Not exactly the best recipe for the highest quality food or the best service. But yeah, the selection of emails just screams middle school drama and had me laughing the entire time!

@JuniperJadePR

2 жыл бұрын

I was gonna mention that as well. The bit about the chicken theft had me cackling!

@RikodiusRex

2 жыл бұрын

I feel like some of these are totally trolling.

@TRexila

2 жыл бұрын

@@RikodiusRex while that is a possibility, as nothing is certain and all that, I have worked in enough offices to 100% believe every email read here was written sincerely by someone who believes they are making a reasonable, well-deserved complaint or comment lol.

@MovementDrifter

2 жыл бұрын

I used to do what the CIA does., spend all my money on drugs, can't afford decent food.

@00muinamir

2 жыл бұрын

Some of the complaints remind me of the years I had to deal with Sodexho-Marriott, it would be hilarious if this is in fact them.

Part of me wants to say the reason they classify things that don't need to be classified is to bury the information they have good reason to classify in volumes of nonsense

@Ass_of_Amalek

2 жыл бұрын

yeah, I'm pretty sure that's it. like how corporate lawyers who are forced to hand over documents for legal cases like to dump huge piles of irrelevant paperwork (in paper form of course, because it's legally sufficient but not easily searchable) that technically contains what they were ordered to hand over, so that the other side has to spend hundreds of hours combing through useless text.

@dasaggropop1244

2 жыл бұрын

definitely. still funny af.

@DSPHistoricalSociety

2 жыл бұрын

Yep yep

@karstais

2 жыл бұрын

That and the fact that this is bad press.

@meszarosmate4629

2 жыл бұрын

@@Ass_of_Amalek this is real life, not the suits, you cant file damp people. They'll just go go the judge and tell him/her what you did and you will be forced to provide the data in an online form if possible and only what you've been subpeanad for.

To be fair, if someone tried to patronize me by saying a cherry tomato is a "red grape"... I'd probably write a passive aggressive comment about it somewhere. Lmao

@mkontent

2 жыл бұрын

Literal gaslighting at a workplace, how dare they

@qwellen7521

2 жыл бұрын

That feels like something Cheryl from Archer would pull.

@Ass_of_Amalek

2 жыл бұрын

a communist grape

@HeatherHolt

2 жыл бұрын

Right like had she said grape tomato that’s accurate but red grape isn’t a tomato bc it’s it’s own thing. PS I love red grapes

@larsonfamilyhouse

2 жыл бұрын

@@HeatherHolt I thought for sure she was going to say grape tomato too!

I feel like I owe an apology to some of the wackier SCP Foundation entries considering how a real-life ominous, secretive and corrupt governmental operation actually behaves, apparently. I really enjoyed this video. I'd totally be down for some more light-hearted content like this in the future, if only on occasion.

You’re laughing. A man got a lesser quality hash brown, and you’re laughing.

That explains why the CIA recently declared Burger King hash-browns a threat to national security.

@heavenly2k

2 жыл бұрын

They're honestly pretty good lol

@austin_bennett

2 жыл бұрын

Bro someone from burger king's gonna go missing over this 😭

@zackschilling4376

2 жыл бұрын

@@heavenly2k Really? Maybe back in the day when they had the cheesey hash brown bits, now those were good! But the ones they ve had before that and after have been garbage. Step up to the superior hash brown patty at McDonalds.

@generaldiscernment

2 жыл бұрын

"I call upon all nations, to do everything they can, to stop these BK hash browns. Thank you...now watch this drive."

@boi6002

2 жыл бұрын

lmao what

I was an air traffic controller for 10 years. There is a phenomenon we used to observe and talk about at work where you'd just fall into a routine of going to work, doing your job, going home, etc. and then suddenly one day you'd be like, holy crap there are literally hundreds of lives at stake every time I make a decision. I like to think something similar is going on here, where these people have just fallen into the routine of an office job but one day they'll suddenly be like, *holy crap I work for the CIA!*

@Punched0

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly! I feel this every once and a while too

@DSPHistoricalSociety

2 жыл бұрын

Excellent observation! Thank you for that!

@attilabubby

2 жыл бұрын

I mean, they chose to be part of the CIA in the first place. I'm not sure how one could gloss over that. Easier to just assume all these people are soulless.

@ettaz

2 жыл бұрын

I've noticed that about a family member who is a doctor. It's just another day at work for her, but every day she sees death, human innards, miraculous survival etc.

@boldCactuslad

2 жыл бұрын

It probably helps that most people working for the government have - you know - boring government jobs. the red tape in private businesses is extensive enough, so it is reasonable to assume that a federal agency would have even more paper-pushing and red tape... Just trying to say that a literal bureaucracy probably has a little bit more bureaucracy ;)

As a gov't employee myself, I'm so grateful my office is surrounded by real restaurants and not on a campus in the 'burbs where the nearest "town center" with anything approximating decent food is two and a half miles away. I almost feel bad for laughing as hard as I did because I *know* they (mostly) aren't exaggerating the abysmal food and service. Then again, I don't even have a confidential level security clearance yet still know how to spell "hummus" and "prosciutto" - and I know those two things are unrelated, but I'd have thought there'd be a higher correlation...

I just love the cafeteria staff lmao they're serving food to licenced killers and really don't give a shit. Like just telling them "don't all chickens have feathers" and "those are red grapes" with a straight face that even the agents couldn't tell if they were joking or not. I need a sitcom about CIA cafeteria staff.

@JKSSubstandard

Ай бұрын

I legitimately want a CIA kitchen series in the spirit of parks and rec but with a conspiracy undertone

@ClementinesmWTF

21 күн бұрын

You vastly overestimate what office workers at the CIA are doing. Actual “killers” (of which, there are exceptionally few since most of our spies are doing more boring sabotage and intel gathering not usually highlighted in action movies) are not working at or going to CIA offices. The CIA specifically builds fake companies and corporations for those people to work at both domestically and abroad-for both cover and tax purposes. They’ll sometimes even use existing companies and slip their espionage agents in for even more believable cover, though they’ll likely just be “lost” somewhere in the accounting books and will rarely if ever show up to that “job”. The people sending these emails were more than likely just pencil pushers, researchers, and analysts who will never see a day out in the field.

sometimes it's nice to be reminded that CIA agents aren't all James Bond and most of them are just every fucking asshole in your office who complains whenever they have to wait two whole minutes to use the microwave.

@Ass_of_Amalek

2 жыл бұрын

bond is not CIA

@randomtinypotatocried

2 жыл бұрын

@@Ass_of_Amalek Yeah, but people still think the CIA are very much like James Bond. The NSA isn't much better from what little my aunt is allow to say

@zorinazutella3270

2 жыл бұрын

@@Ass_of_Amalek I'm aware. You see, there are these things called "jokes". The CIA is famous for spies. Bond is the most famous pop culture spy. By comparing the two of them I have now made the joke that CIA agents are not like a popular and competent spy like James Bond. I have now explained comedy to you, you're welcome.

@johnr797

2 жыл бұрын

@@zorinazutella3270 not debating you on your joke, but the vast majority of MI-5 and 6 in the UK and the CIA *are* typical office workers. Probably less than 1% of the organizations' employees are field operatives. So, yeah, bacon committees and coffee investigations are to be expected.

@SergioLeonardoCornejo

2 жыл бұрын

And that's why they are the bad guys. They are just bullies with too much power.

the grape one was kinda valid tho

@Tazzie1312

2 жыл бұрын

That's an allergy risk for sure and also just stupid.

@AwesomeIan135

2 жыл бұрын

I’m more confused about the feathered chicken one. Do they not just order chicken from a supplier? Do they have an on-site butcher or something? Did they cook the chicken without removing the feathers?

@PongoXBongo

2 жыл бұрын

@@AwesomeIan135 IKR? Most places just get crates of frozen (de-feathered) chicken parts trucked in.

@yofomojojo

2 жыл бұрын

I just love how thorough and reasoned the grape one was, and seething with that petty work email passive aggression I'm so familiar with in my day to day. (I hope you got the note)

@jango7889

2 жыл бұрын

"red grapes" she says. "r e d g r a p e s"

I love the idea that the most powerful federal organization in America has a cafeteria worse than that of a public school.

@brianhirt5027

Жыл бұрын

😅 Most powerful? Not even close! I'd have to sit down and really think about it, maybe poke around but at a from the hip guess the ranking would be closer to 14th or so. Maybe even worse.

@WheresMyInhaler

Жыл бұрын

@@brianhirt5027 I would say the CIA is the most powerful CRIMINAL organization in the world and it’s not even close . They are omnipotent at this point .

@brianhirt5027

Жыл бұрын

@@WheresMyInhaler What amazes me most about the CIA is how well it's blank canvass exterior & spotty history functions as a Rorschach test for eliciting peoples fears. You may never be self aware enough to appreciate the humor value, but I guarantee plenty of the other readers will.

whenever I have a bad day, I'll always remember the CIA have a worse cafeteria food than my food.

To be fair, if my job was to plant seeds of discord throughout the known world, I would be a bit peeved if my lunch wasn't up to snuff as well.

@headlesshunter8435

2 жыл бұрын

I can kill a Brazilian official from miles away and make it look like an accident but I can't even get some gaddamn descent chicken. Worlds fucked man 😢

@Edax_Royeaux

2 жыл бұрын

@Bob Duckington Anything Jeremy Clarkson's eats on a road trip.

@scottjohnson5687

2 жыл бұрын

You are what you eat, They are even paying for it and getting low quality shit... No wonder their mad desu

@OhNoBohNo

2 жыл бұрын

clearly the DD - BK substitute was an *INSIDE JOB* !! /j

This level of petty corporate culture is both deeply relatable and incredibly hilarious. I’m glad that the CIA functions like a normal white collar workplace while doing shady things. Also, $0.50 for a single slice of bacon? Abhorrent.

@NicitoStaAna

2 жыл бұрын

If they know they can pay they will match the price.

@digzgwentplayer4159

2 жыл бұрын

I'm glad that they 're human.

@Robbie-mw5uu

2 жыл бұрын

Wendys charges $1.00 for a single strip of bacon

@Web720

2 жыл бұрын

That's probably because there are people inside the CIA that aren't just agents. I could see help desk, IT staff, accountants, administrators, etc. that probably never left the office/state.

@voidofspaceandtime4684

2 жыл бұрын

@it's bleak it's really sad to see people fall for "relatibility" in an unchecked org that tries to actively destablize the world for the benefit of the few.

"We are trapped here, and I get the feeling the dining services contractor knows it." Is such a raw line about the CIA's cafeteria.

Yes, Muckrock is an INCREDIBLE resource for FOIA requests. I was able to get the AAR that was filed when a friend of mine was KIA in Iraq in 2006. I contacted Muckrock since they had a request in for that specific event at that specific GPS coordinate and asked if they could please share the results of that request specifically. Little did I know they already had the info I was looking for. So, he asked for my email address and sent it over. It was eye opening to say the least. Muckrock is a GREAT resource.

@joshuakuehn

2 жыл бұрын

Ok damn that's kinda cool actually. Sorry about your friend. I hope the AAR gave you some closure.

@multiyapples

Жыл бұрын

Sorry for your loss.

There is nothing more american than freaking out because of fast food, these agents are true patriots

@valthiriansunstrider2540

2 жыл бұрын

In all seriousness though, the Colonists didn't have fast food, and were very grateful to God for their hard-won food to the point of making it a holiday. So the CIA fails yet another patriotism test.

@MC-bo6ql

2 жыл бұрын

And stealing from your employer even if you're a CIA agent.

@joez.2794

2 жыл бұрын

@@MC-bo6ql People steal from the government like it IS their job, so...

@mauricedavis2160

2 жыл бұрын

Oh that's what you call them!!!🙏🤔

@AverageAlien

2 жыл бұрын

Ah yes, working against the american citizen, very patriotic

My heart goes out to the person with the bacon struggle... With inflation, they will *never* see $.35 bacon strips

@OffGridInvestor

2 жыл бұрын

I don't think we have had them in Australia since 1992.

Funny thing about your end statement - it makes sense for people to get fired over a food fight but not a sanctioned operation, regardless of how heinous it is. If they can't keep their cool under the slightest pressure and resort to a free for all brawl, they won't do well bringing in a terrorist.

@MichaelMiller-tm2os

2 жыл бұрын

My gut is these are not the actual agents, but more than likely support staff. The CIA is a government agency, and there is a huge and bloated structure designed to support the fun stuff, like smuggling cocaine and Bay of Pigs. Just looking for jobs that are open at the CIA right now, there are a lot of paralegal jobs, fire safety engineers, contract drafters, web developers, and service jobs in the cafeteria area itself. These people are just like the rest of us, and there are always a few who don't understand jokes about chickens having feathers.

@ananthropomorphictalkinggo6641

2 жыл бұрын

The CIA is like 99.999% mundane office jobs, it's not what it's made out to be.

@KharonDeLune_vtb

2 жыл бұрын

@@ananthropomorphictalkinggo6641 Probably, but you're still working in a fairly legal capacity with a lot of stress on you. If your response to that stress is to huck food at your coworkers, you're out with a recommendation to try Yoga.

@OffGridInvestor

2 жыл бұрын

You don't get that MOST people in the CIA are just DATA ENTRY and NOT under pressure. You've obviously never worked for government in a minor role

@brianhirt5027

Жыл бұрын

Most are analysts. Imagine a bunch of tenured professor types.Kinda like that. The field operations wing is vastly smaller.

Imagine a hacker spends months if not years trying to hack into the CIA only to find employees bitching about the food.

The one about the chicken having feathers on it absolutely cracked me up. You've made me want to create a deep dive video on the CIA cafeteria system.

@stereo-soulsoundsystem5070

2 жыл бұрын

Id watch that and like it

@rmc5607

2 жыл бұрын

@@stereo-soulsoundsystem5070 same Brodie

@thatkidwiththehoodie

2 жыл бұрын

do it. follow your dreams. give the world the content it needs.

@abandonedmuse

2 жыл бұрын

Im subbed. Waiting for it

@TheB00tyWarrior

2 жыл бұрын

Sometimes when you get the hot chicken from Kroger, it'll have feathers now and then

"Apparently at the CIA even the soda is undercover" I lost it 😂 Can't imagine our best and brightest bitching this much!

@abbycross90210

2 жыл бұрын

Apparently you've never heard geniuses like Elon Musk bitch about stupid shit.

@JuliaClark

2 жыл бұрын

@@abbycross90210 no, doubt you'll be writing a passive agressive note about the cafeteria food this week. Lols.

@abbycross90210

2 жыл бұрын

Thank god I don't have to eat in a shitty cafeteria regardless how smart or dumb I am.

@HOLYOKEFLATS

Жыл бұрын

Effdat…I brought some left over shepherds pie from yesterday they made at my mother-in-law house ..hope they cleaned microwave 🎚️🦠

I love this guy, he knows exactly what his audience wants. Of course I would love to read declassified emails from CIA agents having cafeteria drama

I can only imagine the kind of drama that was possible in the old KGB cafeteria.

This was hilarious, and much needed comic relief. I would love to see skits of these. The top spy agency in the world (according to the US), can’t even manage a cafeteria properly.

@SecretSauceyjuice

2 жыл бұрын

Hell yes. Drunk history style.

@Ass_of_Amalek

2 жыл бұрын

I don't think america even knows how many spy agencies america has.

@BomChickyBowWow

2 жыл бұрын

They don’t manage the cafeteria.

@doqjaw4384

2 жыл бұрын

M

@HasekuraIsuna

2 жыл бұрын

Title: Cafeteria I Am, perhaps?

"Even the soda gets to go undercover" I'm dying

@manfromnantucket9544

2 жыл бұрын

Lol'd irl

This is fucking hilarious. I wouldn't mind a series of the random and funny shit you find while researching things.

One of the biggest things I've realized as I've grown up is that all these people who are in positions that, as a kid, seemed super mysterious or powerful or important are still basically just normal men and women doing their jobs. Even if your job pertains to top-secret national security procedures, or regularly doing risky brain surgeries, they're still just people doing what they get paid to do, and most of them have the same thoughts, gripes, and frustrations with their work that the rest of us have. Even though, sometimes, it's nice to think that the people doing these jobs are immune to such pettiness lol

@brianhirt5027

Жыл бұрын

Thank you. This comment should have gotten a lot more love than it did, because it's the naked truth. We're all kinda goofballs. Even the best of us can get a wild hair up our ass and pull a full durp.

From what I've heard, it's not always the information itself, but the method in which the info was gathered, that makes it classified.

@TheJ0kerr

2 жыл бұрын

Nah brah, from working with Nazis before and during the early days of the CIA, to the JFK assassination, to ties to the mob, to interrogation methods, it's classified because we of everything

@chess5559

2 жыл бұрын

That makes everything seem more shady

@deafenziv3596

2 жыл бұрын

Yep, that’s most likely why whenever there was that investigation into UFO’s a while back there was an unclass and a classified version, it’s not that there’s aliens, but rather footage of UAP’s were captured on classified systems or are of a quality that is classified

@Somethin_Slix

2 жыл бұрын

@@PolemicalKobra If he's done this many times before, it isn't very strange that he wouldn't note such a thing here. In fact it's normal for him.

@PolemicalKobra

2 жыл бұрын

@@Somethin_Slix I just wonder why? Oversights are human, and I deleted my original comment for being a little too harsh on a light-hearted video, since I do truly enjoy his content. But I don’t know why barely sociable; who researches deep into a true crime/ other topics with fantastic detail, fails to provide essential and pertinent information to a particular case.

I would think cafeteria food having unrequested LSD in it would have been a big complaint in the 50s and 60s.

I really want a workplace comedy about the cafeteria workers in a CIA building. Like they have to go through body scanners and metal detectors when they get to work, but it's still just Bertha who doesn't know how to put on a hair net properly and has a questionable relationship with deodorant serving hordes of nondescript guys in suits

@antoinesilva1527

2 жыл бұрын

I’m not an American so…..is it the same with the FBI? It seems that they eat better than the CIA. I’ve even heard of Bill Roemer who dined with his informant at Chicago restaurants.

The amount of ways you have by passed saying the word "Cocaine" is impressive.

The CIA is mostly office jobs. If you want to see some really trippy shit, I would suggest looking at the National Reconnaissance Office (NRO) and some of their mission patches. You’re welcome.

@deafenziv3596

2 жыл бұрын

NROL patches are always the dopest

@AudioOasisOfficial

2 жыл бұрын

Comment

@kiloton1920

2 жыл бұрын

What about the state department?

@BlackSeranna

2 жыл бұрын

Where do you go to read this?

@Libbathegreat

2 жыл бұрын

@@deafenziv3596 Damn, those are dope.

I love the fact that the food fight was included in the same document with seemingly the same importance as a memo about the individual writing the memo getting an invite to the Pentagon.

@abbycross90210

2 жыл бұрын

Probably more related to the nigh number of people fired.

This is SO GOOD. Idky but I LIVE for petty drama like this. It just absolutely cracks me up!

The chicken feather one got me, I was nearly in tears. I have heard on good authority that the FBI provides some quality cafeteria food in quantico at least….

This dude sounds a lot like the KZread channel "Barely Sociable." Kinda eerie.

@dracoseason3784

2 жыл бұрын

maybe because it is

@nickpisarczyk

2 жыл бұрын

@@dracoseason3784 r/wooosh

@petahoee8281

2 жыл бұрын

Lazy comment bro

@12pm_KDOGS

2 жыл бұрын

No you got it all wrong, barley sociable sound slightly like sociable

@AnokkyPromotions

2 жыл бұрын

@@dracoseason3784 🙈

Bro, you had way too much fun with this. There's probably a CIA report about it now.

Overuse/abuse of classification was deliberate to create a mountain of pointless classified documents. A form of obfuscation, and also just as likely a means of creating leverage within the government. "we have *so* much classified information, we need $x billion dollars to make sure none of it gets into the wrong hands!" etc.

@LG-pt5kt

2 жыл бұрын

This.

@proudworker7123

2 жыл бұрын

That might be the case, but it's probably more to do with important but incidental information leaking through. Documents like these may seem unimportant, but they might contain nuggets of info that might be useful to foreign agents, so they err on the side of classifying everything and then declassifying later on a case-by-case basis.

@agreedydragon

2 жыл бұрын

Most of what he showed isn't exactly classified. It all said Unclassified which is the Gov stamp for all gov communication that isn't classified.

I can't believe this is real. 😭🤣 this is the funniest shit. And listen, if you've worked in an office setting you KNOW there is no limit to the amount of petty people will get when it comes to cafeteria shenanigans

@incognitonegress3453

Жыл бұрын

Petty, VAPID...utterly disgustingly annoying minions. *the gub'ment is the devil

To be fair, theres nothing worse than ordering a pepsi and getting diet pepsi... then having them refill it, only to be diet pepsi again.

@MrMontanaNights

2 жыл бұрын

McDonald's does this to my wife like every other week lol but in reverse.

Goes to show that whenever a cia agent intimidates you, just think that they’re the one that had a shitty meal that day lmao

@abbycross90210

2 жыл бұрын

What are you doing every day that has CIA agents intimidating you?

@boldCactuslad

2 жыл бұрын

@@abbycross90210 he worked in the cafeteria. RIP

@flamingdog9207

2 жыл бұрын

@@abbycross90210 obv they're one of the people working in the CIA cafeteria

Ahaha... I can answer your question about cafeteria food in Federal buildings. You see, like all contracted government work, the cafeterias are run by whomever puts in the lowest bid. This means that, more often than not, you get pretty abysmal services and food. I used to install AV equipment for Federal Courts all over the country and all the cafeterias are pretty poor quality. The one big exception was the Brooklyn Federal building. They had the best food. Not sure how they managed to serve such high quality meals on a low budget. However, I think Mike and his team there have moved on as they lost the bid to one of the large, worse cafeteria service providers.

"I am writing because I don't know if she was joking." lmaoooo

Ill be honest if someone told me to my face that tomatos were red grapes id question a few things as well.

The repeated switch back to the “jazz salad” email gave me the best form of whiplash, thanks for that dude 😂

"I find it rather amusing that at the CIA even the soda gets to go undercover" had me dying 😂

Its stuff like this that always reminds me that no one would ever be able to hide a massive world changing secret of like some hidden world rulers, because at some level, someone would get annoyed enough about something so small and petty that they would ruin it

I want a dark comedy series about the CIA cafeteria

@MagnusPrimeZ

2 жыл бұрын

sounds like an episode or archer or inside job

@iamV10010

2 жыл бұрын

@@MagnusPrimeZ Inside Job is so good! It's a diamond in the rough seas of modern adult animated comedies. I was skeptical at first but so glad I took a chance on it! Can't wait for season 2!

@MrMontanaNights

2 жыл бұрын

Something like Space Force but the CIA.

@brianhirt5027

Жыл бұрын

There is an actual starbucks in the CIA commons at Langley. You're welcome. Enjoy! PS: Yes, even the morning coffee orders are fuck'n classified.

I am convinced that Barely Sociable's laugh is the cure to all known illnesses.

@AudioOasisOfficial

2 жыл бұрын

2:47 & 3:00

@dustinsterling3248

2 жыл бұрын

@@AudioOasisOfficial you're doing gods work here, thank you

Never assume malevolence when it can be chalked down to plain old incompetence

I’ve worked at government offices before. This sounds about right.

I mean, at least these CIA folks aren't leaking classified documents on the war thunder forums

@hx5525

2 жыл бұрын

What’s the context?

@octakhan4673

2 жыл бұрын

Various military personnel have leaked actual schematics of top secret weaponry in order to win arguements about a video game.

@AbsolXGuardian

2 жыл бұрын

@@hx5525 war thunder prides itself on accuracy. On two separate occasions I believe, people have created forum threads asking the devs to change the stats of a tank to reflect the information reflected in the "declassified" documents they uploaded with their post. The documents weren't actually declassified and the changes weren't made. Now War Thunder requires you to present a chain of custody before requesting rebalancing based on allegedly declassified documents. The first time this happened, it wasn't against TOS for the offical forums so while the mods reported them to the authorities of their country, their account remained in good standing.

@hx5525

2 жыл бұрын

@@AbsolXGuardian Wow. Though doesn’t WarThunder have Russian bias?

@AbsolXGuardian

2 жыл бұрын

@@hx5525 idk, i've never played, I just saw screenshots of the thread and the response.

Whoever processed these requests was like "Fuck it just give him the cafeteria complaints, what's he gunna do with them" 😂

@johndough111

2 жыл бұрын

Sir we can't unclassify our top secret cafeteria records! "Make. Them. Public!" -Director whos chicken came seasoned with feathers

This has got to be my all time favorite piece you have done! I can not express the joy this brought to me, now knowing those bastards can not get a decent lunch brings such joy to my black little heart! Go evil lunch ladies at the CIA! 👍😜👍

Let's save the planet, one unnecessary bacon container at a time! Abraham Lincoln.

This was glorious. “…I hope you got the note” “..I am writing bc I don’t know if she was joking” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣❤️❤️❤️❤️

Not gonna lie, I have many complaints about cafeteria foods. But I'm both glad and terrified that the CIA facilities have just as many terrible cafeteria foods. Jesus Christ, if they get shit for food, what poison is anyone else getting served?

@versebuchanan512

2 жыл бұрын

I mean, considering the CIA is involved, I imagine LSD dosed stuff. Or maybe actual poison.

@Gaybraham.Lincoln

2 жыл бұрын

How much do you weigh?

@work90

2 жыл бұрын

@@Gaybraham.Lincoln how the hell is this relevant to the og comment?🤣🤣

@work90

2 жыл бұрын

@@Gaybraham.Lincoln and "Gaybraham"? Srsly?

@guydude7550

2 жыл бұрын

@@Gaybraham.Lincoln Probably around average, and that would still be half of your mother's weight.

I need more BS reading petty complaints from govt agencies 🤣

"doesn't all chicken have feathers on it?" Priceless

I guess when you can't bitch about anything because everything around you and everyone you work with is classified, you can at least lean heavily into bitching about the food in the cafeteria. 🤣 Priceless!

@abbyhudson4026

2 жыл бұрын

For real. It's the only part of their day they can talk about and it also happens to be the actual worst lol

@OffGridInvestor

2 жыл бұрын

These were ALSO classified documents

$0.50 for a slice of bacon? That’s a travesty. Forget leaving feathers in a chicken, that’s price gouging right there.

@Robbie-mw5uu

2 жыл бұрын

Wendys charges $1.00 for a slice of bacon these days lol

@ablackbunny3149

2 жыл бұрын

Just checked my mcdonalds app and 2 half slices of bacon cost $1.50.

This is one of the funniest videos I've ever seen and I never would've expected it to come from this channel. Please make more like this.

This is like reading emails from the fall of Rome

When you realize that secret services are just a branch of bureaucracy.

@manolo5042

2 жыл бұрын

As opposed to what?

@cmrdjn464

2 жыл бұрын

The machine works best when it's not aware that it's the machine

@StrangeGamer859

2 жыл бұрын

​@@manolo5042 Secret service startups!

@kenos911

2 жыл бұрын

@@manolo5042 the movies For example, people think that when companies lobby governments, it’s this super active and simple process like in the movies. It’s not

Nobody has ever gotten in trouble for "over-classifying" a document. The incentive to label mundane info as Top Secret is present.

These remind me of those terminal entries you see in Fallout games, and like the corporations/vaults in the games, the CIA is probably testing random shit on their employees lol

The reason for so many classifications is to hide the real diamond between mountains of worthless dirt

Always understand that the people in charge are just as vapid and narcissistic as anyone you’ve ever met working at a restaurant or retail.

@Robbie-mw5uu

2 жыл бұрын

imagine comparing wage workers who likely struggle paying bills and have to deal with asshole customers all day to CIA agents paid by the government to fuck with people

@HE-162

2 жыл бұрын

@@Robbie-mw5uu but also free Palestine my dude

@gooseofspooks2500

2 жыл бұрын

@@Robbie-mw5uu I think they were referring to the customers they meet when working those jobs and not the workers but the way it's worded is a bit confusing so 🤷

@DiabloRed24

2 жыл бұрын

@@gooseofspooks2500 This :)

@DiabloRed24

2 жыл бұрын

@@Robbie-mw5uu No reading comprehension plus Pro-Israel. The killer combo.

This is the creepy, true, and truly disturbing and mysterious content I sub for. Thank you for this crazy deep dive.

I honestly don’t think we’ve ever heard you laugh that hard. God that was beautiful.

Surprisingly, this actually gives an insight on a lot of the agencies' problems... the same people that are acting this dumb over food are the same people running top secret national security missions??

Upload schedule becoming more and more like Lemmino 🤣. Excellent content as always dude

That moment when you realize that American Dad is more accurate than even the creators thought.

These documents sound like something Matt Rose would make a video on. The CIA (and I guess the FBI too) has such an air of secrecy and "ooh spooky espionage things" to it that it's almost hard to believe that real people actually work at the CIA and have normal lives, making normal complaints about the food they have to eat on the job.

so, what do you do? I work for the CIA. oh wow, so are you, like, a spy? I work at the CIA cafeteria. - a real conversation someone had, probably.

"That is ridiculous. It is a running joke in my office." had me rolling 🤣😭

I love ALL of your content but this more casual format literally put a smile on my face.

Me: "Haha this sounds liek it'd be a fun sitcom!" Sociable: "The more you fall down the rabbit hole here, the more it starts to sounds like a bad sitcom" Me: "... awe... *closes Microsoft Word*"

By day they overthrow democracies, by night they discuss which day to serve pizza.

This really would make a great sitcom.

These really seem like complaints that were written when someone was trying to look busy doing CIA things.

The soda goes undercover. Omg i almost choked laughing

This is exactly what you get from military commissioned officers, which most of these dudes probably are. There was a mass email sent out in Iraq that sounded exactly like these. The poor guy was SO upset that the daily served grilled chicken breast was not available for that one particular day. Oh, and somebody sent out an email to the entire DoD distribution list about a work order for a leak. The email system became COMPLETELY maxed out in a matter of day with every replying all with “take me off the list please” “STOP REPLYING” and “why am I on this distro? Wrong name maybe? Please remove me”

Clicked on in milliseconds

@kalumW

2 жыл бұрын

I mean.. everyone did technically

@andrew41784

2 жыл бұрын

Real first comment

@nickeman132

2 жыл бұрын

ayoo

This is literally the plot of an episode of American Dad lmao

You have an interesting voice, I could listen to you all day long. Well made videos with a good voice 10/10

The gasp at the hashbrown incident has me shaking all of my three legs and two feet.

it would be super fun to find out that the CIA cafeteria is an MKUltra slow boil torture experiment XD

Me listening to the one guy rant about the price of bacon: hes literally me

Yes im so glad your still uploading!! The quality and effort that goes into your channel is amazing

I'm crying, this basically a sorrowtv video but Barely Sociable, amazing

CIA: Pulls all of the strings that probably _really_ determine global events because regular people are too dumb. Also CIA: Can't get their cafeteria together. Inspires a lot of confidence.

@Ass_of_Amalek

2 жыл бұрын

imagine how incompwtent those governments must be for the CIA to be able to overthrow them...

@Edax_Royeaux

2 жыл бұрын

You should see the US Army rations. Meals Rejected by the Enemy MRE.

@MrMontanaNights

2 жыл бұрын

@@Edax_Royeaux Modern MREs aren't even that bad. At least they aren't the 5 fingers of death anymore.

@Edax_Royeaux

2 жыл бұрын

@@MrMontanaNights The last US MRE I had had the main dish being chili, it was the most foulest thing I ever tasted. Chili cold out of a can tasted immensely better than that. I ended up only finishing the plain crackers and bag of skittles it came with. How do you screw up chili?

@work90

2 жыл бұрын

@@Edax_Royeaux bruh MRE are better food than what I have for lunch at home

"oh it's another suggested vid-- OH SNAP ITS SLIGHTLY SOCIABLE LETS GO!!!!"

Woman: **steals chicken.** Cia Agents: "look at her... she loves it..."

These CIA people have sooooo much time on their hands. 😂😂