I just burst into tears at "Hey, darling" because it sounded solely like Kyle and this seems like something he would do, since he said he had been around the longest before he integrated.

@Ophiane

Жыл бұрын

Yeah I could see Kyle all over that too. You aren't the only one that got emotional at it.

@tori1146

Жыл бұрын

Yeah I never noticed till now how much I missed him saing that

@dre_m

Жыл бұрын

Darling you are a lifesaver... I might cry

@catacc.

Жыл бұрын

Someone knows if they have a video about integration?? I'm really curious about it

@simpliisnowy2393

Жыл бұрын

@@catacc. there is one from before back when nin was new

On a lighter note, is no one gonna talk about how they picked the perfect outfit for ‘Chloe’. That is SO her.

@callanightshade8079

Жыл бұрын

I actually associate that specific shirt with Sally cause she's the first alter I saw wearing it lol. But I could still "feel" Chloe in this video and it reminds me how much I miss her and Kyle but also so happy to have Kya now❤️

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Chloe wore that jumper all the time in college, which is why we picked it out ❤️

@kerriwood8733

Жыл бұрын

That was so good!! I'd love more content filmed in this style from you guys x

@bienkies9152

Жыл бұрын

I just rewatched her meet the alters girls video and Chloe was wearing that and I got so emotional because it was the first video I ever saw of DissociaDID and seeing this video next just felt like it came full circle. I'm rooting for you guys, always have! Lots of love ❤❤

"I don't want to be strong anymore, I'm so tired" resonated so so heavily with me. Even though my medication is starting to work, I'm still so exhausted

@Neantoa

Жыл бұрын

Proud of you! Keep up the good work. Hang in there pal, it will get easier, i promise ❤

@autumnsprite

Жыл бұрын

@@Neantoa I will actually start crying thank you so much 🥺

@Neantoa

Жыл бұрын

@@autumnsprite ofc ❤ how are you?

@autumnsprite

Жыл бұрын

@@Neantoa mentally better, albeit physically tired still

@Neantoa

Жыл бұрын

That's a great first step :) glad that you are feeling better mentally ❤ hopefully the body will also catch up soon with that 😘 but be patient with it, it's also okay to need rest.

This video hit like a punch, can’t quite catch my breath Talking to my younger self and learning compassion towards that little girl is a huge part of my therapy. Hope making this video was comforting to you ❤️

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

It really was! Thank you ❤️

@eleonoranale

Жыл бұрын

Def need a tissue to get to the end of it, it’s a LOT 😅

@heatherlynn1974

Жыл бұрын

It was the same for me. My therapist taught me to tell my younger self (DDNOS) that I am in charge, they don’t need to protect me anymore. ❤

@katherinemillington5682

Жыл бұрын

Same

“did it hurt to change” “Yes.” this was so emotional i wasn’t expecting this! this rly turned out beautiful and it seemed healing for y’all too ❤

"I'm going crazy then aren't I? I know it." "No, no. You were never insane." This part immediately made me cry. I needed to hear that so badly.

Its cool to see "chloe" again for those of us who were around forever. Nostalgic while also loving Kya the same. This was so lovely ♥️

It's almost nostalgic to hear Chloe's voice. Lots of love to you all

@rikavanderhofstad

Жыл бұрын

that left the biggest impression on me too.

when Chloe said that she was tired of being strong it hit me like a truck, instant tears. Never related to something more

@Neantoa

Жыл бұрын

I hope it will or is possible for you to sometimes catch a break from that, even if it's a small one ❤ eventually they will get more and more.

@PaganSkye

Жыл бұрын

Is Chloe back I really liked her

@PaganSkye

Жыл бұрын

I wish I could talk to my younger self and tell her these things

also the "i don't think i want to be strong anymore," i can feel that in my soul

@Sabinee211

Жыл бұрын

I know right. People always say I’m so strong but I’d give so much to not be. This shit is hard

@saorise28

Жыл бұрын

I read this at the exact time she said it

@justkaywithmusic7894

Жыл бұрын

4:46

i started crying out of nowhere towards the "I'm so tired" I relate so much.

@callanightshade8079

Жыл бұрын

Me too. I know that feeling far too well and when Kya says "I know baby" with this understanding tone

"I'm here, aren't I? That means you make it through where you are right now." That hits hard. 😢

"someone will save you, and that person is you" Hit me right in the emotions why don't you 😭❤️

This was extremely powerful. My therapist tries to get me to do things like this and I’m always so embarrassed. But hearing you say “Stop looking back. You have so much more to be. Open your eyes and allow yourself to exist where you are now. The rest will come to you on its own” really hit me.

Wait but why am I already half crying because you said 'darling' to your younger self??? Watched the whole video, loved the message❤

I appreciate that you have empathy for Chloe. I won't say I was in a similar situation as Chloe when I was her age, but I was being abused and parts of my system wanted to scream and yell at younger me for being "stupid" and allowing myself to be used. It's taken a lot for us to have a talk about what being a victim does to you psychologically. Also, the part of the video where you talked about having to save yourself stung. I have become so strong over the years but I hate it. I resent the part of me that had to *become* strong. In a way, I shouldn't have had to. I hope life gets even easier and easier for your system as you get older. I hope you can continue to make a safe place for people like us.

@glitterspray

Жыл бұрын

It’s exhausting to be your own ally and savior. I can advocate for others, why is it so hard to advocate for me?

@callanightshade8079

Жыл бұрын

@@glitterspray because we are taught/brainwashed from a young age that we shouldn't care about ourselves as much as we care about others. We feel guilty when we need to take care of ourselves for once.

@glitterspray

Жыл бұрын

@@callanightshade8079 absolute truth.

That "I don't want to be strong anymore" hits so hard. I know ppl mean the best when they tell me how strong I am, but the problem is, I shouldn't have to have been this strong. I didn't ask for any of this...

I wish we could tell our younger selves that we get three what they thought we couldn't. Thank you kya and co for always helping others and being so sweet

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

❤️❤️❤️❤️

"But I'm here, aren't I? That means you make it through where you are right now." I started bawling here. I wish I had had someone, anyone to tell us that we were going to make it to the next day better yet to here. We never thought it possible. And though we're still not out of danger yet, we're still here and we've made it through this far. Thank you, Kya and Co.

Being here from the first few videos, it was interesting and heartbreaking understanding some of the behind the scenes Chloe was struggling with even before her first video. I’m so proud of you.

you probably won't see this but I would like to share that in my health class, we watched your interview with Anthony Padilla to learn about DID. My classmates were pretty engaged and I saw them paying close attention. You are making a difference in the education of DID and I think that's awesome. Keep up the great work everyone

"You look like a different kind of tired than me"... That hit me off guard. Hi Kya, hello to the system! Two years ago I got diagnosed with dysthemia (a high functioning depression without episodes, basically chronically depressed), OCD and an eating disorder and my life was turned arournd 180. Things my mother did to me, that I considered normal, because "she was just stressed", or "because I was in puberty"... Once you realize what really was going on... you cannot go back to the way things were before. Being tired was one of the first symptoms, that really made me realize that somethings is different compared to my peers. I always thought I'm just not the happy, extroverted friend. That something is wrong with me, others matter more and that I'm the problem. But that was just my mind speaking to me. That I'm basically depressed since I'm a kid and that my depression does not come and go in episodes was a tough pill to swollow. Now, after being 2 years in therapy I realize that everyday is a gift and that bad days, moment come but that they also go. I'm not my worst enemy anymore and I'm very grateful to myself that I let myself grow everyday of my existence. Learning never stops! And healing is a journey that sometimes hurts more than pushing away. To anyone who reads this: things will get better eventually. But it's okay that it feels at first like it's getting worse. We are strong, capable and no one can take that away from us! Love, Johanna ♥

@glitterspray

Жыл бұрын

Knowledge is power. The Disability Community helped me realize that major depressive disorder is a disability. Not “laziness” or a “character defect.” I stopped wearing myself out with guilt and beating myself up. Now I do the best I can. And do it better because that burden is off my back.

@danashulps4974

Жыл бұрын

@@glitterspray good for you 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Love to hear that! It is true. Depression is so often mistaken for laziness, most often even by ourselves. I used to be so toxic when it comes to me, but others I let pass so easily. I couldn't have said it better!

@DieVorleserin-ok8zr

Жыл бұрын

I think that's the first time I ever conceive a statement from another person with dysthemia. Thank you for making me see I'm not the only one. And I feel what you wrote about your mother, for me it was my father. You never really see the errors of parental behaviour when you're a child just wanting to be loved. It makes me quite hopeful to read your comment. I, too, feel like my most important acceptance was that I will always have bad days where nothing works the way I want to, but that I can learn to deal with them. Have a good day, wherever you are~

@abilevitt3334

Жыл бұрын

This is beautiful too. You are so strong.

@milenamartins21

Жыл бұрын

I also have dysthymia, I hope someday I can say "everyday is a gift" and feel like I'm being honest

hearing the little kyle-like inflections later in the video (around the 9min mark or so) really enforce to me the idea that he was a protector. he has always been there for your system and will always be around in some regard, and existed back then in such a protective way over baby chloe even without her knowing it... the fact i can hear so much pride from kya as a whole but especially from the remnants of kyle makes me really emotional. he wanted y'all to push through and be okay one day so bad, and it's nowhere near perfect now but a lot of healing is being done. such a powerful vid. i'm proud of all of you. :)

this felt good to listen too even if it wasn’t meant exactly to us an audience, it worked really well and it gives us an idea of who chloe was (for those who never met her) and i hope she knew she’s very strong :]

"You look a different kind of tired" broke my heart, but for some reason this is so healing Kya&Co, thank you guys so much

hi, kya! hi everyone really! i’ve commented before but i just wanted to reach out again and tell you how brave you all are and to thank you for helping us understand this disorder and helping us normalize what we’ve struggled with for so long. thank you for being our inspiration :)

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

I'm so glad to hear we've helped, and thank you ❤️

@niroopotsav

Жыл бұрын

💕💕💕

"We are different, but I'm still you, at least in part." This hit home hard, both because I've been a subscriber since Chloe was host and am definitely feeling the nostalgia seeing "her" again (you're a better actor than you think!), but also because these are the same protective riddles some of my older protectors would use with me in the beginning stages of "coming out" to me about our being a system. It only makes full comprehensive sense in hindsight once you get all the information. 15 years later I still have big AHA moments where puzzle pieces from past cryptic messages/thoughts/influences suddenly become clear with context.

To everyone in the DissociaDID system, thank you thank you thank you 1000 times thank you. Your continued vulnerability and honesty with us, your viewers, it will always be welcomed and appreciated. For the alters who help make these videos we really love the effort and lengths you will go to to create interesting and exciting ways to communicate and inform us about your experiences within a DID system. To EVERYONE in the system, thank you for allowing this channel to be a thing even if you’re opposed to it, it helps so many others every single day. You’re all incredible please keep it up❤

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Thank you so so much! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@niroopotsav

Жыл бұрын

Agreed!

really hoping you all get the support you need for your case

The pain bit resonated so much with me! It was nice to see “Chloe” again. My therapist has told me to talk to my younger self when I am being negative about myself and thought it would be a waste of time because it’s hard to feel empathy for myself but this was really inspiring and making me want to try it!

@glitterspray

Жыл бұрын

I found I can feel a lot more sympathy to a younger self. I wouldn’t treat another person with the disdain and disgust I treat myself. Especially a child! We always consider ourselves exceptions who deserve nothing but the worst.

@Lpuicnaesapple

Жыл бұрын

My therapist said the same ! Inner child care. I named my younger self Rox because she likes rocks.

My therapist encouraged me to write letters to my younger self, give her love and support and validation she didn't receive. It was painful, exhausting, but also really allowed me to start healing. These talks we have with our younger selves are so powerful. 💚

"One day you will look at those photos with much kinder eyes and say, 'Dear God, I was a beautiful thing!'" -Moira Rose We are always our biggest bully. Your present self many not always like who they are, or what they look like. But the future you is always much kinder towards them, full of forgiveness and understanding. This quote is something I always think of when I feel like I'm not enough. It's like getting a hug through time.

I was medically neglected too- I’m also chronically ill. I wish I knew then what I know now. Maybe it didn’t have to be this bad. I don’t have DID but my doctors think my chronic illnesses are so severe as a result of how severe and prolonged my trauma was/is. I have C-PTSD and it seems like every few months I suffer a new serious trauma which then makes my chronic illnesses and chronic pain even worse. I keep thinking there’s no way my chronic pain can get worse and then it does. It’s to the point that I’m bed bound and not taking care of myself because it’s too painful. The fact that I have to feel the abuse I went through every second of every day and it’s excruciating painful is incredibly fucked up.

@kamamaunillama31

Жыл бұрын

We also were medically neglected, and are still doing appointments now as an adult to figure out a lot of digestive system and reproductive system issues we have. We were recently diagnosed with Gastroparesis, which is chronic, and it seems like we've had symptoms since we were little according to some stories from my mom about our eating habits and complaints as a child. It probably wouldn't have gotten as bad as it is if we had known earlier, because we could've been eating food our stomach could handle the whole time and not overworking our digestive system. The doctors think there's a lot more than Gastroparesis though. One of the visits, the doctor suggested that a lot of our digestive issues might be caused by the abuse we went through as a kid. So, I can relate a lot to having a constant reminder that my body is screwed up because of awful people. There are days that I can't get myself to eat solely because I might get nauseous and be reminded of all that. I don't have to deal with severe pain, but I do have to deal with chronic nausea and often throwing up and such. I can't imagine it being chronic pain. I'm so sorry that you live with that. (On a cheery note, I send good vibes and hope that you have or can get a service dog bc dogs are nice and people with chronic pain can get service dogs)

@sapphicalix

Жыл бұрын

@@kamamaunillama31 I have gastroparesis too! It’s a mild case but it’s been getting more severe lately. I know how much it sucks, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with that. And I’m so sorry you were all medically neglected when you were young as well. I have a dog! He’s not a service dog but my doctor has written a letter stating that he’s an emotional support animal so that I can’t be denied housing with him! And he always knows when my pain is extra bad and whenever it is he snuggles up extra close to me and won’t move for hours until I feel better 🥺 He’s such a good boy. He’s the best. He’s my whole world. I love him more than anything 💕

as a fusion of 2 parts, this was very helpful for me. Bri and Rosie were both strong, but were always stronger together, hence the fusion. but unfortunately the fusion made it impossible to separate the trauma they each held, so it affects our day to day like never before. I want to go back though and speak to Bri and tell her she is strong, because she didnt know it then ... :(

This is making me cry so hard right now. I hope it doesn't sound weird but I am struggling really bad and this is video is like that light in the dark. Love you guys

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Things are gonna get better. You can do this, we love you ❤️❤️

@roseeinlove

Жыл бұрын

@@DissociaDID ❤️❤️

@alysmarcus7747

Жыл бұрын

yes, i don't know your situation but i get it. i haven't been able to listen to all of this yet and i want to. my friends have abandon me and the doctors long ago practically shoved me down the nearest crack. my psychologist, who was so lovely died two years ago. all my young ones keep asking when will it get better. and i don't have an answer.

@tdstellar5218

Жыл бұрын

You are loved 🥰

This is so emotional. We never give ourselves the affection we deserve, but this video reminds us that we do deserve it💜

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

You do ❤️

i love the format of the video, even though the you that didn’t know about DID one bit, you still protected that innocence and didn’t let them know anything that could change the outcome of the future and i loved that

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

❤️❤️❤️

Playing catch up is eye opening. This one is heartbreaking, seeing how Chloe is hurting. Also, heartwarming with how loving and gentle Kya is with Chloe. The fact that I'm crying shows how affecting this is. So beautiful and inspiring!!

"Open your eyes and allow yourself to exist where you are now. The rest will come to you on its own." I burst into tears at this. I'm 22 and am completely useless to this world, with no real excuse. I have some reasons, but others have gone through worse and still come out on top, so it's not an excuse. I don't know what to do with my life and I am blessed in so many ways, but I ruin it all by making myself feel guilty and horrible because, well, I believe I deserve it. I need to exist where I am now and I guess trust, believe, something in myself. Maybe I'll figure it out later. Idk. But this video made me feel like there's a future on a day where I feel like there's nothing. Thank you for this Kya&Co. I, and apparently many others, needed to hear/see this today. P.s. the acting was great! I was noticing how your movements as Chloe were so much more unsure (constantly moving and fidgeting) while you as Kya stood fast and sat with confidence. I was instantly sucked into this, and if I didn't know better, I would think you had filmed this when you were younger and then replied to it when you're older! 10/10 acting and you deserve a round of applause for it. Definitely NOT a flop! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

@stellabright1455

Жыл бұрын

Hey! I have no idea what you’re going through, and this is by no means trying to force you into positivity or whatever (I know life sucks sometimes and it’s okay to say so). Just… just know that everyone goes different paths in life. What positions others are in doesn’t or shouldn’t matter, because you’re your own person and they’re their own person. And it’s good that way! You being in a “lower” position is excused by you simply being a different person. Also, I personally believe every human has worth to the world purely by existing. This of course doesn’t mean you should, too. It’s just a fact that I started mindlessly scrolling through comments and ended reading a story that touched me so much I felt the need to cheer the person up a bit and tell them to appreciate themselves

@Deadpool4president

Жыл бұрын

In a world this big, with so much always going on, being inconsequential to the world is normal. It's okay. Your worth is not determined by the world and the role you play in it. Your worth is infinite and unmeasurable, because here you are. "Worth" is not something that has be earned. It can't be gained nor lost. You are you, and that's enough. What matters isn't the world, but the life we create for ourselves on it, and more than that, how we feel about our lives. You don't need a reason to not do better or to do worse. Some people have always overcome worse, but there are others who haven't, those who are still struggling, still fighting, and whose lives still hold just as much inherent meaning, because struggling doesn't make someone less than anyone else. Struggling to do better doesn't mean you deserve worse. You don't have to have everything figured out. In truth, no one does, and those who do will likely be disappointed, because that's never how things go. It's okay to still be finding your place in the world, especially at this age, in this dumpster fire of an economy. The only people who aren't struggling right now are those who cause struggles for everyone else. You are not alone in how you feel. You are not alone in trying to figure things out and having no idea. Most importantly, you don't have to feel alone. Like Kya said, they go to therapy. They didn't figure these things out alone. They had support, and so do you. If you can get professional help, please do so. If you can't afford it or your situation simply won't allow it, see what there is. You don't have to feel this way.

@LiorTamir

Жыл бұрын

Hi Not here to tell you what to do or anything, but just know that you are being ok. You are being loved. You are being empathised with. You are doing a good job. And in the words of I think Nin? "You have value. I N H E R E N T L Y." All the love and support in the world.

“i don’t wanna be strong anymore, im so tired” FUCK BRO IM CRYING

theres this quote i really like from The mermaid's voice returns in this one which is part of the Women are some Sort of Magic series by Amanda Lovelace and its two of the poems say, "do you ever find yourself nostalgic for the life you never got to have? - (because i do)," and, "do you ever find yourself nostalgic for the person you never got to be? - (because i do II)" and this video has the same energy as those quotes. (side note the whole series is really good and if you are able you should read it [each book has a list of all the triggers in it on the first page])

I love how you could still see the 'safe' sign between 'Chloe' and Kya. This was a beautifully inspiring video 🖤

Whenever I am asked what I'd say to my younger self, there's nothing I can think of. I would only give them a hug, a long, genuine hug.

i'm 20 now and have been watching you guys since i was 15 when the dissociadid project started and we were just figuring out that we're a system. everything said in this video by your 16 year old self resonates SO hard with me, and with a lot of the other members in our system as well. i cannot express how much everything you said as your 26 year old self now resonates in me. these are things that i wish i knew when i was younger, and things that I've struggled with accepting as I've grown. thank you for this video. it means a lot to way more people than you guys will know. i started crying not even 2 minutes into the conversation

I remember looking down at my left hand when I was about 20 years old and I gasped because for a split second, I saw an old woman's hand. Since then I have become increasingly better at leaning into and letting myself be comforted and supported by the many different version of me: the versions Ive been and the versions I will be. It feels really amazing whenever Im able to let go in that way and lean into myself. I don't know. Your last comments to yourself about future and past you made me think of that. I liked the video ❤ Im glad you're back and would love to see more like this if you are up for it

9:46 Oh this was nice to hear. And about where I started crying. I'm not in, nor have I been in an abusive situation before (which I'm incredibly grateful for) but I am depressed, it's just, good to hear. So yeah, thank you.

i think, every person with some kind of trauma, living there life no matter what, is so much stronger than every "normal" person will ever be

This was really touching and reminded me how I needed to carry my younger self with me to my future. I'm still doing that, but I don't feel exhausted anymore like I used to. Thank you for sharing 🧡

"You saved yourself" make me goin into tears really hard, cuz I used to say that I lot for myself when I was younger plus : "you gonna need me in the future" and that actually happened,I made it happen like you guys,not about revenge but actually for increasing personal interest in life. Feeling any kinda of emotion like sadness/anger/frustration doesn't mean that you're weak,that's what make us humans/people/emotional being/ part of a society/community. (Everyone is stronger in their own way !!!) So thank you so much kyaAndCo for reminding me about it. Lots of love for the entire system and thanks for sharing your amazing journey 💕

I will never go through a millionth of what you have, but I had many dark moments where I didn't think I could go on due to people in my life making me feel small and worthless. You described this video as "different", but I felt that it was *powerful*. My inner child feels seen, loved, and validated. I appreciate that you didn't hold back any punches. No toxic positivity. You told yourself that it hurt to change, that you're still tired, and that things don't get where 16 year old you was hoping for. But in the wake of those painful truths you gave back strength, love, and hope. This video was beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing this intimate moment of humanity with us. You are fantastic

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

❤️❤️❤️❤️

This was so cathartic to watch. Chloe reminds me so much of who I was before I split off. Kya reminds me of my primary protector too. Thank you for this Channel

When I found out about your channel, and all the content you did, was when you shot a video with Anthony Padilla about DID. I came here because, during the moments you appeared in the video, I felt a "weird" aura. "Weird" because it didn't feel like anything else I've ever experienced in my life. So I wandered around here, saw some light, and came in. I found a space where people are talking, yeah, but they listen as much as they talk, and accept each other. That "weird" feeling became more common the more time I spent here. Not commenting on every video, but watching, and listening, and reading, this feeling felt less and less weird as I came to put a name on it : understanding and acceptance. Thank you so much for all the work and time you put in here, the safe space you created through this channel, and the positive messages and vibes you sent to us through your content. It may sound (or look) weird to say it like that, but now, coming to your videos every other day feels like I'm coming home, getting a warm cup of tea while wrapped in a soft blanket, making it much easier to unwind, relax, and soothe from the rush of everyday life. I wish you all the best, and that all of you reading this message manage to journey through the path of your recovery as safely as possible, but you are strong. Take a deep breath, relax. You've got this. You have it in you to overcome any and all trials waiting on your path, and remember that you are worth everything good, and you deserve to be happy. Stay safe everyone, and take care ❤

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Something I noticed watching your videos is that you look like the original portraits of Anne Boleyn. And coming from art history major, which is a complement. This is a great video idea. Thanks for everything, Entire Dissocidid system.

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Wow, thank you! Xxx

The end of the video made me cry. I've never really been told that I matter it's always been to stop crying and put others before myself. I hope when I'm 26 I can look back at myself now and help her. I want to be okay. I want to have a good role model. You guys have really helped me in that way. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

"You look a different kind of tired than me" that hit.... when my mental health journey started I was so tired but years later I'm exhausted in a completely different way.

This felt almost like you were talking to everyone who's been through abuse and trauma. The martyr part just reminds me about one of our littles writing angry notes at one of us who is older but stuck in very martyrous trains of thought. She apparently has also told one of our friends "stop being a martyr I hate martyrs" because he was pushing his feelings down so we'd be "happier". I sometimes start thinking like a martyr but that little is SO blunt about how martyrdom is bad and it cheers me up and makes me think better of myself at the same time

Bro, thank you for this. My host needs to hear this so badly because she’s been putting therapy to the side (she doesn’t feel heard and felt that she should deal with it on her own). Thank you Kya & Co! - Jake

@thechaoticbunch-osdd

2 ай бұрын

JHC Jake, thanks for the absolute shock that you commented on this acc without me knowing 😂 I know you watched it, you absolute bugger but I didn’t know you commented! I’ll listen to the vid again tmr, it’s 1:30am and sleep schedule is as bad as it is 😭 - Jesse (aka the host he’s been badmouthing/lh)

@thechaoticbunch-osdd

2 ай бұрын

I’m leaving my comment here too This entire vid and the lessons taught, I somehow managed to demonstrate it through certain situations. My application is not perfect yet, but I’m getting there! I’m not sure when I fused with another male alter (who frankly gave me the confidence), but ever since then I realised I’m so much more and shld not be a ppl pleaser in the first place. I may not have the best environment growing up, but doesn’t mean I can’t live to my fullest Thank you Kya (and Omega!) for this. This just reaffirmed me that what I’m doing right now is worth it - Jesse

If I'd tell my 16 year old self how strong i am. And heard the answer of "i don't want to be strong anymore." This was the age when ; happened. Still not over it.

"I dont think I could last much longer" that almost broke me. I've felt this everyday but I keep pushing. Because one day I know that I'll get through it. That goes for everyone too. You will get through this. It will get better. Have hope, its all we got these days.

Thank you so much for this, I really needed it. My therapist has been telling me to write a letter to my younger self for a while but I haven't been able to. It's been to painful but after this I feel like I'm ready. Thank you ❤️

I did do something like this once in therapy for social anxiety where I went back to a moment where I felt very ashamed and anxious, and then I had to let my older self step in and tell my younger self exactly what I needed to hear in that moment. It worked quite well.

"You're strong and this much pain isn't normal" AAAAAAA MY FEELINGS

I think this style worked really well. It was fascinating to see Chloe meet her future and for Kya to talk her bodys past host. It makes me wonder how a talk with my 16 year old me would have gone.

Thank you, thank you so much Kya. You have no idea how much I needed this. My sister is in the ICU right now, battling for her life. She is one of the most precious people in my life. She started improving a little, but she is not out of the woods yet, and my family and myself are terrified. I needed to be reminded there will be another side, one that doesn't seem as gloomy as now is, and that I can make it through.

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

I'm so sorry, sending all our love and support to you. There is another side and whatever happens you can do this ❤️

this is actually making me cry😓

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Oh no! 😅

This is such a powerful video! Thank you for sharing and being brave enough to film this. I can only imagine the effort it took, both mentally and also time wise to plan and edit it. I hope people see this and try it themselves, even if they don't have DID. I have C-PTSD and my therapist had me do this a few weeks ago and its was so hard but also do clarifying. Thank you for your strength and sharing so that everyone can learn.

we quit our job today that had been mistreating and exploiting us and idk why but this video just hit us so hard after that. like yeah. we’ve grown so much, we survived. we had our first job for over a year and when it became too toxic we quit. looking at our past selves who thought we’d never be able to go to college or have a job (as a system who’s in college and held down that retail job for so long) it’s just amazing how far we’ve come. -silver

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Proud of you ❤️❤️

Noo I was not expecting to cry so hard. Especially 6:05. I have an entire journal dedicated to the concept of “being allowed to exist” as myself. Really great video ❤

I don't have DID or anywhere NEAR as much trauma as your system has gone through, but I definitely do have PTSD from my past. I've never once considered talking to my past self, and thinking about it makes me feel like I'm not ready yet. Maybe one day I'll be able to face that younger part of me, but until then I'm gonna work on fixing present me now.

Apart from how deep this hits I'm very impressed that you managed to time the dialogue so well😅❤️

@DissociaDID

Жыл бұрын

Haha thank you

Oof… the getting in trouble part hit my like a ton of bricks. That’s my number #1 fear I’ve developed with trauma.

Reality is realizing that Chloe and the rest of the system are important and beautiful. What I love about this channel is that every alter fits perfectly with each other

This was cathartic to watch and is making me think about what I would say to my 16 yo self. Vicky formed around that time, and she is always around today. I wonder what it would be like if I could easily access that state of mind. It feels blurry. ~Taly

@glitterspray

Жыл бұрын

Talk to her. And listen Sometimes our selves just want to be acknowledged and heard.

I've shed a few tears watching/listening to this video. Some of what "Chloe" said is nearly identical to the things I said/heard at 16. I started talking to my 16 year old self after this. And I'll be 26 in June. You are strong and you are loved ❤️

Speechless, in a good way. This was very strong.

Beautiful video!! You always inspire me even though I don't have DID, and now I'm inspired to talk to my 16 year-old-self too (I'm 34 now). I have many words of encouragement (and empathy) to give him. He searched for answers. I'm glad to tell him I found some and he'll find them too when the time comes. Sending love to you and your system, Kya! And thank you!

It's crazy how we feel like we don't change much as time goes on bit when we look back at our younger selves ten years ago you really see just how much wisdom and experience you wish you could share with that younger version of you. You feel like it would've spared you a lot of pain, heartbreak and frustration but it's also the paradoxe because had you not gone through those times in your life, would you be the same person? Idk if it's just me but seeing those hard moments in my life, even the traumatic ones, as something that was necessary to make the person I am today exist with all of my qualities and my faults, it kinda helps to accept those moments and find some sense of peace in them. Like they happened, and maybe I would be better off without them, but I wouldn't be me. I exist because I made it through all of that and I'm damn proud of that fact.

I loved loved loved this. My inner child needed this and my current self needed this. And I’d be interested if it’s healthy for you to see the same kind of conversations between your current alters. Even something benign. I’d be interested to know how that takes place in the inner world. If it does. Thank you for your vulnerability!!!

Omg! This brought me to tears ( in a good way). I absolutely adore this video and this type of content. You did amazing!

This was amazing. We've written letters to our younger self and written imagined responses meant to be from her but this being both visual and verbal was really powerful

@MysticSynergy

Жыл бұрын

The other reason this hit is because our legal name and previous long-term host was named Chloe

Man, after watching this, I kinda wanna do it myself. I think if I could talk to little Robin, there's so much they'd need someone, anyone to tell them. Kya, thank you for inspiring me to be the adult I needed when I was young. You've taught me that it can be... No, that it *has* to be done

@glitterspray

Жыл бұрын

Getting in touch with your child self can be so helpful. I realized she (and I) had been expecting far more than any sane person would consider appropriate. Don’t feel is has to be done though. Some just aren’t ready; may never be ready.

@skyesthelimitro

Жыл бұрын

@@glitterspray I agree that addressing one's inner child doesn't have to be done for everyone. But what I had meant was that we all should try to be the adult we needed as children. Everyone was missing something growing up, and far too many people either don't recognize it or don't try to fix it for the next generation, in my opinion

I'm sobbing 😩😩 I wish I could go back and tell my younger self a lot... This was beautifully done!!! You are incredible and I love watching your videos.. Lots of love and good vibes ♥️🖤

I surely wish I could actually do this with my younger self. When you were talking about speaking out for yourself I started sobbing. What sort of people could we, those of us that needed to hear it when we were young, be if we could have heard it from a source we'd actually listen to. This was truly beautiful. I'm sure it wasn't easy to do, both emotionally and technically but I appreciate your efforts. I especially appreciate the flash warnings. Anytime a creator thinks to add that to their content, I feel the need to thank them for it, so thank you for thinking of those of us that need it. Lots of love to you.

I don’t like to think I’m an emotional person, but when the words “It will be clear as you get older “ got me teared up

This hit VERY hard. Around that age I felt a lot of the things Chloe here said, though my circumstances were entirely different. Now I'm grown up, slightly younger than you guys and actually feel happy. I know who I am, what I am and how to deal with everything. Hearing Kya talk to Chloe sounded exactly like how I'd talk to my younger self if I could. It brought tears to my eyes remembering how far I've come. And it's amazing to see how far you guys have come as well! Thank you for this amazing video

Kya, this video is beautiful! as a 17 year old myself, i found it to be a whole emotional experience. I am currently bawling my eyes out, but in a good way. i could see a part of me reflected in 16 year old Chloe, and i could see my strength and my future reflected in you. "The future is just as much a part of you as the past". Thank you Kya! this was as healing for me as i hope it was for you.

Thank you, from the 16 yo in an abusive relationship i once was...and from the adult I've now become after years of struggles, just thank you.

This reached a part of us we try to deny. Ages 13-16 were some of the worst for us and what we would have done to have someone have this conversation

Hello, I just wanted to come and comment and tell you all I love and appreciate your content. It helps me understand (at least a little) the world of DID. Two of my favorite people have DID and your channel has allows me to understand it a bit more and be there for them.

Commenting after viewing it. Honestly great idea kinda want to make me a letter asking questions to my future self. It's a new kinda editing but I'm here for it. Some parts are a little floppy, lol. But I can see how this video can be healing for other people, and potentially you guys. Plus, I mean it's inspired me to write something for myself. (I'm 17 btw) I love learning about mental health and stuff along the lines of sociology as well so that's why I follow you. Great video, very inspired right now. Hope everything with the legal stuff gets better within the year and by the end of the year you won't have to worry about that anymore. I've been watching y'all since I was around 14 and love y'all's content. Anyway with this long message ending can't wait for the next chapter of your content without the legal problems and Internet drama. Hope one day you guys will find some type of peace in this hectic world we live in. Love ya and can't wait for the next video to come out, whenever it does.

Nothing breaks me down faster the people who you expected to protect/provide or love you. Break you down and try to fix you together in their vision

Really needed to hear this reminder today. I'm 31 and i still didn't realize that I'd closed myself into an abusive relationship and was losing my soul until i cold turkey split from the person. Within the first day I felt my confidence and curiosity and intensity of feeling start flowing back. For those still locked in (and always at your own pace): Get yourself Out. Get yourself Help. Get yourself Together. Only then should you even begin to worry about any other human on the planet.

"Crushing your emotions, pain and needs isn't going to make them love you more" wow this hit

I had to stop watching your videos while pregnant to protect my unborn child from potential affects of psychological distress & now that he's almost one year old, I practice this to him & for him everyday, especially after an adult family member tried to make their own problems seem more important than his wellbeing - this video has made me feel better about the choices I made in the moment & quashed all self-doubt I had while shutting down this family member. Learning to be a mother to new life while living with PTSD has given me newfound strength I did not know I had & new appreciation for the value of one life. I wish I could tell my 16 year old self that felt the same as Chloe these words of reassurance. Thank you.

Damn that hit hard! Also, the glitches actually fit, like you have disturbed the space time continuum by talking to your younger self

i chose to get help for my mental health today. this video came at a perfect time. as heartbreaking as it is to see how you were as a teen, it felt like you were talking to me when you said “i’m tired” and “i don’t think i can go much longer”, your responses were so uplifting and i truly took your words to heart even though they weren’t for me. thank you for this

I started watching your stuff pretty recently, but I really like all of it. Thank you for bringing awareness to mental health. You are also very strong to be sharing this with people online. :)

I bawled, I cried, she is the moment, now come on now 🥲

I love the message of this video. Great stuff!!!

All of your videos are so educational! I used to think DID worked in a completly different way but seeing your videos have really been more educational than ever! Keep doing what you do! I wish you all the absolute best!💗💗💗