Totally agree find A Sponsor or Someone you TRUST. Thank you GOD I have you 💞

@DRKJFOSTER

5 жыл бұрын

You are a blessing 💜😘

Step five for me is the biggest step toward letting go of suffering

@DRKJFOSTER

3 жыл бұрын

Yes, agreed. Same here. Thanks for watching and sharing your experience.

Thank you, I found this very helpful. I'm about to do my 5th step and there is one thing I have already shared with a therapist but would rather not disclose to my sponsor. This video let me know that this is ok.

@DRKJFOSTER

4 жыл бұрын

Yes, Donny! I'm so glad you found it helpful and reassuring 💜

Good advice. I am sharing my 4th step with my therapist as well, because I trust her, and she's bound by confidentiality. Have you done a video on picking a sponsor?

@DRKJFOSTER

3 ай бұрын

Hi Gus - No, I haven't. I'll ask Tony to do it since he is still engaged in 12 Step. Glad to hear you're doing well and reengaged in the program and working the Steps.

I'm about to do the 5th step as a sponsor. This was very helpful, thank you!

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

Hi PennyLane - I'm glad to know you found it helpful. I apologize for my late response. I'm just catching up on my comments.

hello thank you for this video. I'm in my 8 mos of sobriety going 9 in a few days & just had my 4th sponsor. Don't get me wrong the first 3 were very good & I have a very healthy relationship w/ them & constant communication. This video set me a target for my 4th journey. Thank you so very much.

@DRKJFOSTER

9 ай бұрын

You're welcome. Congratulations on your 8 months of recovery!!

I feel this step is difficult because of the ego doesn’t want the negativity of oneself. But I am committed to trust my sponsor. I feel just like you did.

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

Hi Edna - I agree and hope you found the video to be beneficial. Sorry for the later reply. I've been moving this week so I'm just now catching up on my comments.

Great video. I have 36 years of uninterrupted sobriety, and you taught me alot.

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

At 36 years that's certainly a compliment. Glad you are enjoying the videos.

I would never do the steps again with another person in AA as there is far too much gossip within this very tight little community. I've been sober 25 years and as much as I appreciated having AA for my first few years, it became too much of a social circle. EVERYBODY knows everybody and yes, they talk behind your back. I keep in touch with a handful of people who helped me at the beginning and have moved on with life.

@Ramzblood

23 сағат бұрын

I left because of this very reason. Not only will they gossip, they'll turn you in to the folks! The fellowship of AA is way overrated. And down right toxic, to be honest

@Vashti0825

16 сағат бұрын

​@Ramzblood I recently went back into the town where I used to live. The hairdresser (not in the program) shared the rumors of my "departure ". She still cuts my former sponsors hair. Its so convoluted, not to mention she broke my anonymity. I had made a lot of efforts to not do that, yet a sponsor can? Unfuckingbeleivable. Toxic is right..and very hypocritical.

This is the best guide I’ve ever found for doing the steps. My recovery community is a very healthy one, but I never learned the personal choices we have of doing them according to our level of trust. I would have guilt and shame for not trusting and that would keep me frozen and not moving forward. Also I found in this video choices for leading someone through step 5 in a way to gain trust. We let the spirit guide us and not push our will in any way on the sponsee. We want to be trustworthy and attract trustworthy people into our lives. Thank you so much for this series.

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

Hi Lisa - Thanks so much. I'm glad that you are enjoying the videos. I appreciate you sharing your experience as well. I apologize for the late response. I hope you have a great day and week ahead.

My thinking was along the same lines about step 5 as shared in the video. It just simplified for me. My recovery over many years has been pretty much my experience with step 5 also. I'm still a member of the Sunday Serenity step ans traditions group and I feel refreshed in my thoughts to share about step 5 in our group. Thankyou JK. Barry.

@DRKJFOSTER

3 жыл бұрын

Thanks, Barry. I appreciate you watching and sharing your thoughts and experience. I hope you have a great day1

An interesting interpretation and very helpful to us sponsors

@DRKJFOSTER

Жыл бұрын

I'm so glad to know you found it helpful 👍

I am bless to have my sponsor that I totally trust. I just did this step a few weeks ago and it was a really good. I learned a lot about my self and why I did some of the things that I did. I am now aware and I can work on myself. Thank you KJ...

@DRKJFOSTER

5 жыл бұрын

Glad you are finding it helpful 💜

Ego deflation what a gift. It’s deeper than wrong. It’s the hurt deep inside. Causing me to believe strong hurtful life sucking false realities about myself.

@DRKJFOSTER

4 жыл бұрын

Hey, Len. Sorry, just seeing this comment. Thanks for watching. Hope you found it helpful 💜

This is the first time that I've been on this link I need to tell you you were amazing

@DRKJFOSTER

Жыл бұрын

Thank you. Sorry for the delayed response. I've been sick and just now feeling better.

Leave me a COMMENT and let me know what you think of the video and any experience you have with Step 5. Also, please LIKE and SHARE with anyone who may benefit. Thanks for watching 💜

@gavinmurray2037

Жыл бұрын

Love it! Great directions Ma'am

My name is Maria Hawins from Newark New Jersey now I live in Perth Amboy NJ but please keep doing your videos I got more insight by listening to it's crazy because I have to do the fifth step on zoom tonight

@DRKJFOSTER

Жыл бұрын

I'm so glad you enjoyed the video, Maria. Best of luck to you and your recovery.

Love this. Thank you!

@DRKJFOSTER

Жыл бұрын

Glad you enjoyed it!

Brilliant!! So helpful thank you

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks for watching, Paul. Glad to know it was helpful.

Very helpful love how she delivers this

@DRKJFOSTER

Жыл бұрын

Thank you, Gavin. Glad you found it beneficial.

Step 5 finished 😹

@DRKJFOSTER

4 жыл бұрын

👍 Awesome

Thanks for this KJ 🙂

Great video ☺️👍 thank you 🙂🙏👍

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

You're welcome. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Hello hope all is well with you?? Absolutely love how you explain the steps. Much love and respect

@DRKJFOSTER

Жыл бұрын

Thanks so much. All is well here. Glad you enjoyed the video, J.N. Hope you are having a great week!

This video is old. I don't know if you still read these, but I am curious how you told your sponsor that you would not be doing the 5th step with them and how they responded. Did they accept that and continued on with you even though you did do the 5th with them?

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

Hi there - Yes, I read them. I did my 5th Step with my sponsor, but the first time I did the 5th Step it was a part of a sponsorship family group and not one to one. I did not feel comfortable sharing everything in that environment. I then shared it with my therapist and then ultimately did finally share everything with my sponsor. I have heard horror stories in AA of people sharing their 5th Step and then the sponsor sharing it with others. Most people who enter into recovery have trust issues and I don't believe you should just trust anyone right out of the gate. Trust takes time to build and what I'm suggesting in this video is that if you aren't ready to open up or if you've opened up and then that trust was violated, you can always utilize a therapist or counselor to share with. The 5th Step does not say you must share everything with your sponsor it even suggests utilizing clergy or therapists. I hope this makes it more clear. Thank you for watching and for your inquiry.

I think you can tell anyone your Step 5 however you should be honest with your sponsor. I think these things come up in step work. We are confessing this with another person but working the rest of the steps with our sponsor. These certain things you are not telling may come up again so we must be careful about not sharing information to all parties;this is a process.

@DRKJFOSTER

2 жыл бұрын

Hi Kris - I agree. For me, it was getting to a point where I fully trusted my sponsor and this took a long time. I didn't want to necessarily wait for that to happen, so I chose to use a therapist initially and then ultimately told my sponsor everything. It's interesting because now I don't have a problem telling anyone (when appropriate) the things that I was initially afraid to tell my sponsor. Thanks for watching and sharing your experience.

/What if you don't trust anyone?

@DRKJFOSTER

3 жыл бұрын

Hi David - that is a common concern and experience with many people. I would recommend going to a counselor or a therapist who specializes in substance use disorders. It would be best if you could get a recommendation from someone. Otherwise, give yourself some time to get to know someone and wait until you are comfortable and more trusting. I hope that helps.

I don't have a power of my understanding so i could never do this step. That and I don't trust anyone.

@DRKJFOSTER

3 жыл бұрын

Hi David - Yes, that makes it very difficult. What about a therapist? They are bound to confidentiality. I originally did a majority of my 5th step with a counselor.

@davidwhitcher1708

3 жыл бұрын

@@DRKJFOSTER I have considered using a therapist.

I've had a great life with the usual dumb regrets but no major 'shame '. I am an alcoholic because I've loved drinking , not because of some perceived 'trauma' . Not all have hidden trauma, do they ?

@DRKJFOSTER

3 жыл бұрын

No, you don't have to have had any trauma at all. It's common, but not a prerequisite. There are many ways people become addicted. For some, it happens very quickly because of the predisposed genetic factor. Others, it happens slowly over time as the brain is continually bombarded and the changes that take place over time. And then there are others who have experienced grief or trauma that has escalated their use. And let's not forget those unfortunate folks who went to the doctor for some relief from pain or had surgery and were prescribed a medication they didn't know was addictive. Virtually anyone can experience a substance use disorder. And that's what it is... an "experience." It's not who you are, doesn't have to be an identity. It's an experience, an illness, that you (anyone) can recover from. Thanks for watching and leaving your throughts and experience.

@plusbonus1165

3 жыл бұрын

Excellent. My thoughts concerning the spiritually of the 12 Steps are , will it work for me , or do we have to be brought to our knees by shame /circumstances ? I do admit that I'm powerless over alcohol and this lack of control brings immense personal shame . Good channel and subscribed ✔.

you're hot %100

@DRKJFOSTER

5 жыл бұрын

Thanks 💜

@letstalk1974

Жыл бұрын

@@DRKJFOSTER you have gave me so much inside thank you Queen I've been in recovery for 16 and a half years still learning still still growing 💗 I like what you talked about