“I can’t get a shave because I don’t have a razor, and I can’t get a razor because I don’t have a shave.” most Marine Corp thing i've heard

@tidefanyankee2428

2 жыл бұрын

It would be funny, if it wasn't so true.

@reeces90

2 жыл бұрын

Yet the PFC had a haircut only a doc could be proud of

@thereptiledude7247

2 жыл бұрын

I love how authentic vet tv is with the USMC irony. Had a Sgt Maj yell at us once for saying err

@StupidFunny614

2 жыл бұрын

@@thereptiledude7247 he would’ve chewed me out kuz i would’ve been laughing my ass off

@localenterprisebroadcastin5971

2 жыл бұрын

Fuckin boots….everyone knows you have to make friends with docs to get a “no shave” chit from time to time 😂…these dudes must have been RBE…there’s a real science to shitbaggery or dare I say art 🤔

“It’s all good, I’m on leave” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@markbrennan1393

2 жыл бұрын

Saw a dude who hadn't shaved in a few days because he actually was on leave get refused service at the chow hall because of that. The cooks told him he needed to go home and shave, and then he could come back. Hahahaha

@itb4255

Жыл бұрын

@@markbrennan1393 Its not that hard to just shave on leave lol

@M3TA763AR5071D

Жыл бұрын

​@@itb4255 Why the hell would you do that?

@itb4255

Жыл бұрын

@@M3TA763AR5071D avoid trouble? my philosophy is to stay out of trouble whenever you can. Even for stupid shit like uniforms and whatnot.

@M3TA763AR5071D

Жыл бұрын

@@itb4255 but you're NOT in uniform when you're on leave?

I had the perfect room mate, he was in a different unit so whenever we failed room inspection for the giant pot leaf poster we would just blame each other and nobody would say anything until next room inspection.

@therealdyl1099

2 жыл бұрын

Brilliant

@hieug.rection1920

Жыл бұрын

I had Doc as a roommate to much the same effect. Except it was all his shit I kept getting healed at for. Weird shower moo-moos and oddities through. Worst thing I had was a comfortable blanket that was blue instead of the issued sheets.

I remember being a new boot on camp Geiger. My buddy and I thought we were funny messing with the fresh boots reporting to itb or mct. I saw this tiny little guy walking alone, and I was like, hey bitch, where's your battle buddy, and he's like, "I'm a fucking staff sargeant" 😱☠️

@elijahbradford8254

Жыл бұрын

I could hear those words in my head so loudly

@sheepleslayer586

Жыл бұрын

Did he smoke the shit outta you.

@itb4255

Жыл бұрын

omfg bro lmao

@althor9997

Жыл бұрын

@@sheepleslayer586 haha no, I guess he was too busy or something, because that's literally all he said and kept moving

@TheInfantry98

Жыл бұрын

@@althor9997 you are extremely lucky

My favorite move pulled during one of my room inspections when I was a brand new boot was when one of the Sgts couldn't find anything so he pulled a screwdriver out of his pocket and started taking apart our microwave and showing us how dirty that shit was haha. It was like the 4th time he'd been back that evening, I wasn't even mad cause of how much I admired his creativity.

@donoimdono2702

Жыл бұрын

my favorite move shown to me if you WANT to fail someone - slide all the clothes in the closet to one side, it scrapes the metal hangars across the metal rack leaving a metal smear on top. then wipe a finger along the length and you come away with a dark grey smear on your fingers.

@adudewatchingyoutubevids

Жыл бұрын

@@donoimdono2702 😂😂😂 I might steal this one.

@donoimdono2702

Жыл бұрын

@@adudewatchingyoutubevids - he was good. he would also offer you a challenge; he would stand in the doorway and white glove from there. he was 6'3" so long arms, plus would also get down on the floor. if he could find anything w/in his reach - you were restricted to barracks for 3 days. if you were clean - 4 days no inspections. it was very rare to see anyone take the challenge and I only saw him lose once. so many times I saw him just pick crap out of the bolt throw hole in the door jamb, yell "FAIL !" and walk away 🤣

@adudewatchingyoutubevids

Жыл бұрын

@@donoimdono2702 Sounds like an exemplary guy 🤣

@donoimdono2702

Жыл бұрын

@@adudewatchingyoutubevids - he was funny AF

The two rifles under the mattress in the intro was amazing if you caught the reference.

@jonathanforsythe445

2 жыл бұрын

I love that you caught that. It was very intentional lol

@DannyAgu94

2 жыл бұрын

shit had me fuckin dyin man

@dallascurtis444

2 жыл бұрын

I went on leave 12 hours before that all went down. I missed that working party thank God😂

@quik478

Жыл бұрын

can I have some briefing?

@fluffym8159

Жыл бұрын

What does it mean tho

The razor line sums up the military

The room reveal was comedy gold. But no signature cocktail? No signature dish to be hocked overtly?

We had the PJs thing at the chow hall at MCBH but the dude said "It's alright, I'm on leave" when the Sgt Maj of the Marine Corps was visiting and asked him that...

“I can’t get a shave because I don’t have a razor, and I can’t get a razor because I don’t have a shave.”

@nostalgicvibes3122

2 жыл бұрын

Poetic in a way

We had a health and comfort at French Creek after a 72. One guy had a sweet gaming set up across from his bed. Right next to the bed facing the big screen was a set of boots, with his trousers puddled around them, and his blouse right on top. The bed was surrounded by pizza boxes and cans. Nearest we could tell he had melted out of his uniform on Friday and hadn’t moved from that spot all weekend. Uber relaxed.

@s0urce.ow0

2 жыл бұрын

Sounds like one of my buddies in Hawaii. We were all commo. So of course the nerdery was strong with all of us. But this guy had the worst WoW addiction you would have ever seen. Every Friday he would do exactly that, and you wouldn't see him until PT on Monday, looking like he hadn't slept a wink. Health and welfares were always rough for him.

@jeramiahhampton1875

11 ай бұрын

"French Criminals." My best friend lived over there. That's where all of the shenanigans went on from 2009-2012. One dude killed his roommate with a jackhammer drill-bit and tossed him off the 3rd deck and then drug him into the woods. Crazy fucks.

4:30 that actually happened to me in Afghanistan i was supposed to buy razors for the whole platoon but could actually get to the px on the fob because i kept getting smoked trying to get there

@michaelgoober3079

2 жыл бұрын

Why did you get smoked for?

@kidfunkyfri3308

2 жыл бұрын

@@michaelgoober3079 facial hair we ran out of razors for about a week and I was the youngest person in my platoon and had a baby face they thought I could make it to the px

@michaelgoober3079

2 жыл бұрын

@@kidfunkyfri3308 Silly

@kidfunkyfri3308

2 жыл бұрын

@@michaelgoober3079 it was silly I got smoked 3 times trying to get razors for my platoon

@michaelgoober3079

2 жыл бұрын

@@kidfunkyfri3308 I was in the Marines before the Army. The last time my E-6 tried to smoke me in Iraq. I lost it and tried to throw hands. He actually just walked away like a bitch he was. He never tried again

This video is packed with more profound truths than a philosophers journal "I can't shave because I don't have a razor, I cant get a razor because I don't have a shave" "Yea, I don't wanna play fuck-fuck games. I'll be getting out soon and I don't wanna deal with that shit." "I'll play the game." "I didn't see a point in any of that"; this quote in particular sums up 7 years of my life that I'll never get back. In fact, on all VA hospitals, "I didn't see the point in any of it" should be translated into Latin and made the official slogan for veterans

I'm calling this fake, not nearly enough homoerotic shenanigans.

Does axe stomping your homie's melon following Smajor's order make you a blue falcon?

@Pallium_Industries

2 жыл бұрын

Ive literally been in that position, i picked him up and knocked him back down 4 times. The last time i got him up, i grabbed his fist and heald it up in the air and the guys watching cheered. NCO involved was pissed bc its a "fight to the death"😂😂😂. One more round and he woulda got me, i was assed the fuck out. I aint gonna go curb stompin my bros just bc some fuckin stripes told me too.

@markburkhart3387

2 ай бұрын

What's blue falcon?⁉️🙏🎯🔥💩

"You remember when I first got here? You were getting choked out." 😏 " And then you killed the guy" 😨

Damm this makes me miss fucking around looking busy carrying the same supplies back and forth hiding in the medic cage until final formation. Doesn’t matter what branch we will find a way to avoid work at all cost.

@isaac-vb1ng

2 жыл бұрын

As an e-1, I can relate

@RoninWarrior1776

2 жыл бұрын

😂😂🤘🏽it definitely takes Finesse

@Pallium_Industries

2 жыл бұрын

Found a clip board once, carried that bitch for a week and nobody tasked me for shit. Handed it off to a guy who agreed to take 2 weeks of CQ.

@Pallium_Industries

2 жыл бұрын

@@isaac-vb1ng mans ready for the E-4 mob

@gregggatewood9396

2 жыл бұрын

When I was a Seaman Apprentice I would walk the ship with and MRC card pretending to maintenance..knowing in wasn't qualified to do shit!

Thank you Sergeant Major, very cool!!

The before and after being exactly the same... yeah that's pretty accurate.

“Fucking kill him” most often said thing in the marine

The nostalgia! And its even taking place at Lejeune!!! That "ERR" killed me :D

The trick to field day is to make your room look like no one lives there, and completely ignore the black mold that I’m sure is still plaguing 5698 at Miramar 12 years later.

I don't know how much do Marines have changed in recent years but I'm pretty sure a sergeant-major seeing a room like that and then screwing off like that..there lives would be over..literally. I doubt you would even find the bodies.

@mofo7689

2 жыл бұрын

He would show why wearing the chevrons PROTECTS them under him.

@plzburnme3809

Жыл бұрын

It’s a comedy series…

@milewesler9592

6 ай бұрын

Ya'll got far too comfortable with rank. All I'm sayin is, when the next near peer kicks off, ya'll gonna see why fragging was a big thing in vietnam

You're not supposed to go to the chow hall while you're on leave. Or if you do, you have to pay for it. Most people don't know that, though.

@467076

2 жыл бұрын

lmao who the fuck ever follows those rules.

@billlam7756

2 жыл бұрын

I never knew that 😂🤣😅

@MrStaybrown

2 жыл бұрын

Who the fuck stays on base while on leave?!🤣

@Controlaring

2 жыл бұрын

it comes out of the paycheck either way

@010Roi

2 жыл бұрын

I want to see that MCO instruction. HAHA or I want my BAS

We need a whole season of that 😆 🤣 😂

gave me flashbacks during that field day inspection scene!

In real life, this would have simply been a massacre in the barracks. The Corps would just request some new Marines sent to their unit and nobody would ask questions.

Damn brings back memories of Thursday night field days that always turned into a night of getting shit faced followed by Friday morning CO PT and run where we would sweat that nastyness out. RAH!!!!

We need more of these

I was reading all the comments. Damn, the Corps sure as hell has changed A LOT since I was in!

Outstanding, Jarheads! Happy Holidays! Fair winds and following seas to all.

@usmcdoc2512

2 жыл бұрын

Eerah

@Alpha-up3mo

2 жыл бұрын

@@usmcdoc2512 DOC!! Give me the ibuprofen! My leg has blown off!

@GySgt_USMC_Ret.

2 жыл бұрын

@@usmcdoc2512 Ooorah, Doc! Happy Holidays! Corpsman up! (Jarhead Alpha has some knee pain).

@usmcdoc2512

2 жыл бұрын

@@GySgt_USMC_Ret. he just wants the silver bullet again. 🤣

@usmcdoc2512

2 жыл бұрын

@@Alpha-up3mo YUT!

Went to the chowhall after 2 weeks of not shaving and said the exact same thing to a major lmao

Awesome. This was solid. The PFC was great lol

The good ol' door frame swipe. Brings back memories.

the “err” revived so many memories

Talk abt my PTSD and flashbacks kicking in after that choke and stomp. In a good way 😌

@usmc187

3 ай бұрын

I subscribed after I saw that 😂😂😂😂

Hahahaha, me likey. I subscribed and hit the notification bell, nice work and a continuous role playing service member myself here. Ooh-rah!

Anyone ever notice the SgtMaj's chevrons are 1 army and 1 Marine chevron?

@madskater5

Жыл бұрын

Yes! how is no one noticing? LOL

@TheInfantry98

Жыл бұрын

@@madskater5 cuz we’re not POGS

'You got water on my cover', I'll hear those words the rest of my life

Gets stopped by a random Sgt as a pfc. Tells him I was told not to listen to POGS.

that bks room reveal is so command marine corps it hurts..... heres the before and heressssss the after..... its like theres nothing changed!!! except for the pat on the back im writing in my fitrep for this tour of duty......lolllllll

I still have that same tiger blanket that you see at 5:59 on left bed and I got out in 1997!

I m 43 so I remember every Marine from the 60's up til 1992. Knew the Knife Hand Karate or Karate Chop as I called it. My uncle got into it with this guy and man he Karate Chopped him Every which way but LOOSE😂. Dude ran around like a kid getting Belt Licks💀😭💪💙

@keithdudley9199

2 жыл бұрын

🤬💥👋✋

That unmotivated Err killed me lmao

More please 🍻

Does that PFC have a medium low? Wild

@AndyDaClimber

2 жыл бұрын

Them PFCs think they rate I guess lol

@MrStaybrown

2 жыл бұрын

POGs do that.

@0311tard

Жыл бұрын

Probably senior as hell with 2 NJP’s under his belt

Saving the free world... one field day at a time. Yut!

This is funny bar rescue but marine corps this is perfect omg

I chuckled a bit when he said "finish him". lol

This is too damn good 💀💀💀

Sweet

I miss Chinese field days

Bro these really need to be uncensored lol

Most marines I’ve met are simple people You point at a dude or general area Tell a marine to kill destroy it…they will.., along with anyone and anything in that gridsquare

Oh my

Thank God they got SGM Taffer and not Gunny Heartbreak.

“Is that a rat?!”

I'm on leave SgtMaj lol 😆.

I’m dying here 😜😆😆😆😆

One mind any weapon Fatal Kevlar bash to others Skull I saw this happen Something I can't unsee

I felt this episode on another level. Seriously. I HATED this BS

@breadb4meat

8 ай бұрын

i was literally getting so pissed to its so accurate, these people are permanently fucked up its so sad how their brains dont work idk if its an iq problem or what.

Oh the memories I had a ssgt who would put on his dress blue gloves and wipe the fucking walls.😂😂

Sgt major went mortal kombat on them.

The before and after are the same lmao

We needed this shit at hood

@SpaceRanger187

2 жыл бұрын

You got a dead body under your 🛏️

LMAFO!

What the hell happened to my beloved Corps. What a couple of shit birds.

Hold on, he has army Sgt Major chevrons on.

They just killed that dude lmao

"Then you killed that guy..." LMAO

8:48 looks like the kid from re6

lol The room looks the same Remember you where getting choked out now you kill that guy

The before and after pictures of the room looked the exact same to me

@Pallium_Industries

2 жыл бұрын

Thats the point, the shit they corrected was so miniscule, nobody but a SMJ would give a fuck about it.

@rusty7984

Жыл бұрын

Only in the Marine Corps wil you see a grown ass man yelling at another grown ass man because there was water in the sink

Please tell me there’s more than one episode of this

Do a MTV Cribs theme?

oh man. I loled so hard qhen they just killed the guy.

this is fucking great 😂😆😂 base rescue

How to say make room if I wasn't some of the Marine corps has a few civilian if I was in the Marine corps I'd say make way

is that really camp lejuerne... i dont see black mold, running / dripping water onto electrical lines.

LMFAO 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

Was the before and after the same video? LMAO

And you killed that guy...

You couldn't embrace pronunciation and drinking at the same time if you're good enough at it. But you got to be really good. But that's the Navy LOL thanks Navy get them there boys and ladies 🔱 so who would have funk that you could ever use emojis as punctuation 🤔

PFC just blue on blued and no one’s gonna talk about it

😂

lmao base rescue

Camp lejeune you pronounced it incorrectly sir there's an r in there even though it's invisible

Hahahahahah

Lmao.

Is it bad that these shows make me want to join the marines?

@Shion-cr9sl

2 жыл бұрын

Kinda

@josephohara2457

2 жыл бұрын

No bro

@unfortunateson5016

2 жыл бұрын

Same, Rah!

@unfortunateson5016

2 жыл бұрын

💀

@Pothead2005

2 жыл бұрын

Well depends where your stationed.

Funny

The navy would destroy us for not making our beds right no shit the used protractor a square but the funniest inspection they found one of the guys we roomed with well they found his very special white sock WHT he said I couldn't maintain my self we all l couldn't stop laughing hell even the inspector was laughing

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

HAHAHAHA

Hey goldilocks, 7nsat guy haircut⁉️💩🦧🔫🔥💣🎯🙏

UNSAT! INFRACTION!

SgtMaj needs to play Alec Baldwin in the upcoming Alec Baldwin biopic

There's a 40 oz of Mickey's that was in the sunshine and getting warm and suffering so I had to kill it.

i love this but the actors are lacking emotions if you watch bar rescue the guy rescuing the bar is emotional and loud and the people working there usually back talk and also get emotional

@ehova5838

2 жыл бұрын

Then it wouldn’t be realistic for the military lol

Six beers per Marine? I don't know is the Air Force any better. I hear they got hotel rooms and stuff. And every time you got a hotel room I got a hotel bar. Anyway there's more to come I'm pretty sure h's h this hotel militarily speaking.