Thank you sooo much!! As I am practicing Kristin Neff's meditaion "providing for our needs", I kept of seing absolutely nothing! No worry about that (I'm safe, I live a regular life, it's ok) But watching your video put smiles in myself! I see a map in front of me : easier to find a way...

Short and simple is often the answer. It's easy to over analyse yourself and apply a bunch of different labels to your character and personality. In my experience, these fundamental needs get overlooked regularly. And that is really the issue. I'm grateful that you are able to draw my attention this xx

15 months And this is as far as I have come. Too much confusion when your Lock IN!! My ADHD loves Short Videos!! This is great Thankyou Jess.

Thank you for this video. It was comprehensive, cogent, succinct, to the point.

Thank you 😊

Most helpful schema therapy videos!

It feels sometimes as life is a paradox, and here I mean the paradox of attachment vs autonomy... Wanting to belong, wanting to be alone 😃

Thank you.

@thePSYCHcollective

4 жыл бұрын

You’re welcome Matt. Jess

Thanks for the schema series, you have been breaking down things so succinctly! In terms of meeting emotional needs, i often perceive this to be contradictory to the schema concept of accepting vulnerable emotions and not trying to change them. For example trying to meet the need of attachment/safety when anxious feels like trying to change the feeling. How can these concepts exist together? Also to what extent is it necessary to meet emotional needs if they have been triggered by irrational parent modes?

@thePSYCHcollective

4 жыл бұрын

Yes, it can be very tricky to balance. I believe the key is to use your healthy adult mode to get a need met rather than a maladaptive coping mode. This means it is a skilful “I’m feeling anxious, I will call a friend to talk”, rather than “I can’t stand this feeling, I have to get rid of it and I need someone else to do it for me”. Try the same for your parent modes.

@sameeriscool1000

4 жыл бұрын

@@thePSYCHcollective Thanks for the swift reply. Just to confirm, in regards to difficult emotions (which often occur due to tragic uncontrollable events) is there a difference between accepting the emotion vs resigning oneself to it? For example, "I acknowledge that I am experiencing sadness because X happened, but will grab a drink with a friend (not excessive drinking)", rather than "I acknowledge that i am experiencing sadness and should hence not try to cope by cheering myself up"?

@thePSYCHcollective

4 жыл бұрын

Acknowledging the emotion doesn’t mean you have to stay stuck in it.

Great message! No matter how progressive or conservative we are, whether we want to follow a 10x philosophy, positive psychology or want to manifest whatever the f we want to manifest ... the inventory of (universal) needs is a piece of psychology we will always need to consider, regardless. Because it is reflective of our core nature.

Is it possible for people to experience for this needs in various degrees? I identify strongly with the last 4. But I don't feel like my need for attachment is nearly as strong as I perceive it to be in others. Often times I feel like that need isn't there for me at all. Does that mean I have a distortion in my self-perception that could be addressed? Is it possible that my feeling is truly correct and that it is indicative of a permanent personality disorder?

@thePSYCHcollective

4 жыл бұрын

As I don’t know you, I can’t answer this specifically but there are a few possible things that could effect this 1. You have a secure attachment already so don’t feel the desire to chase more, 2. You’re highly introverted so you prefer you’re own company, 3. You’re avoiding attachment as a protection mechanism, 4. Something else that I can’t diagnose over KZread, but if it’s really bothering you or causing problems then talk to a therapist for more individualised help.

I really lack the first one, quite introverted, not alot of strong family connections or friends, and due to my chronic illness I’m not always in a chatty mood. How do I fulfill my need for attachment? I’m already in schema therapy but we just started.

@thePSYCHcollective

3 жыл бұрын

Start small with safe people. Keep it time limited at first so you don’t get too much introvert burnout.