Durin was so upset about Elrond not visiting him because he knows it’s only a 2 minute walk to get there

@stalkingchaos

Жыл бұрын

well technically Elrond spent most of his time in Lindon, so it would have been at least an hour to walk to Khazad-Dum. haha

@darrenchiam2472

Жыл бұрын

@@stalkingchaos Really? With the way people just teleport all over the map in the show without regard for the passing of time and distance, felt like 2 seconds to me.

@michelecastellotti9172

Жыл бұрын

@@darrenchiam2472 his was a joke

@darrenchiam2472

Жыл бұрын

@@michelecastellotti9172 and so was mine.

@shayla106

Жыл бұрын

@@stalkingchaosWith no guards or resources? 🤔

Do you know why good writers are praised, and bad writers are mocked? It's because good writers look up... ...and bad writers look down.

@SynnJynn

Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂

@weareorigin

Жыл бұрын

Words like this are strong enough to sink an elven civilization. But I'll just sail away in my female ship that has eyes that look foward.

@panzershrek7942

Жыл бұрын

Bad writers look up while writing and good one look down doing what they are supposed to do.

@HellsGateChannel

Жыл бұрын

Sir, you made my day hahaha

@LadyIno

Жыл бұрын

I know this is a joke, but it kinda makes sense xD good writes look up to other good writers, so they try to create something equally good. Bad writers look down on every kind of input, as well as legitimate criticism, so they see no flaws in their bad work. They're blind because all they do is look down on others.

There is a tempest in me! -Taco Bell

@deceiver444

Жыл бұрын

-Tacodriel

@filam7371

Жыл бұрын

😂😅

@ExxylcrothEagle

Жыл бұрын

Season 13 was these best. When the Baja blast finally took control of the plot

@patriciamontecchiarini6318

Жыл бұрын

This was the worst line.

@tiffanyl4829

Жыл бұрын

They stole this from Cate Blanchett as Elizabeth and just made version look weak sauce: There is a hurricane within me, Sir! Cate Blanchett is amazing...

The dialogue is like a spring rain over the corpse of a dead animal.

@davidstone-haigh4880

Жыл бұрын

Yep, what were they trying to convey with such terrible, fanboy, school English comprehension level rubbish?

@plothos8380

Жыл бұрын

Do you know why the rain falls upon the corpse? It is because the living rain is compelled to seek out death, while the lifeless corpse longs to live and so will welcome that which gives life.

@Mauriziobarenboim

Жыл бұрын

@@plothos8380 still better than what the writers could think of lol

@frosksdeadteeth5163

Жыл бұрын

Like a dog that's rolled in fox crap being hosed down.

@Nopeasaurus

Жыл бұрын

@@plothos8380 Tears in my eyes.

"The sea is always right!" What's not to like about this billion-dollar dialogue? 🤣

@MrPsych77

Жыл бұрын

They just want to have in what their mind is an epic callback for the destruction of fake numinor when it happens

@FlyfishermanMike

Жыл бұрын

I prefer "the sea is frequently wrong but occasionally correct, depending on the weather."

@wongszeshi1613

Жыл бұрын

Probably trying to create the Greyjoy sea people of this show

@sarl2121

Жыл бұрын

@@FlyfishermanMike The sea is always wet

@BWMagus

Жыл бұрын

I mean, the sea DID try to kill fake-Galadriel, so...

I like how back-in-the-day evil doesn't exist BUT Galadriel physically assaults a child and her brother carries a killing knife around with him.

@VesnaVK

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, and the way she had her fist drawn back was creepy -- she was going to destroy his face like some gruesome action spectacle movie, not just give him a normal kid punch. Not to mention, we have a bunch of horrid, cruel bullies who taunt and mock one of their peers and destroy her boat. Sounds like a lovely place to live.

@tototats16

Жыл бұрын

It shouldn't have even happened since Galadriel is supposed to be royalty and a princess of the Noldor at the time, so everyone respected her. She just felt like a regular human swinging around her dumb sword.

@Darkstar_Dayne

Жыл бұрын

Galadriel was a Princess dude who tf would try to bully her?

@candidwings5609

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, I laughed out loud through the whole sequence.... which I could tell wasn't what they were going for

I think awful is a bit of understatement. Most of the dialogue are inconsequential, incoherent at times and above all, simply nonsensical. It sounds like a dumb person trying to pass himself as VERY smart but failing miserably! 🤦‍♂️

@bottlethrower1544

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, this really pointed out just how totally incoherent the dialogue was. The Ship Stone Paradox was just the bigginng. Maybe if it were played backwards it would make sense.

@Matt67012

Жыл бұрын

It’s called dunning Krueger effect. In this case, in the context of two inexperienced show runners

@williamroberts6803

Жыл бұрын

More five plus letter words in your comment than in any episode.

@Alastor999

Жыл бұрын

It’s the work of a pretentious writer who just writes down whatever they think sounds cool and profound, but has no substance or context. Fanfic level garbage writing

@NCRRanger7753

Жыл бұрын

@@Matt67012 Exactly on point. The Dunning Krueger effect indeed. Only thing is, it wasn't just the showrunners. It was the *ENTIRE* crew. The showrunners, the directors, the writers and most definitely the actors. The only group that showed any promise are the fledgling special effects people.

Blanchette's Galadriel was so incredibly powerful because her posture and mannerisms were so under control. Her presence carried weight and fell heavy on the atmosphere in the room. You could FEEL her power, she commanded respect and admiration. making a boss b*tch ironically takes away all that majestic presence, and makes her from one of the most powerful creatures of middle earth into basically a supersoldier. Her anger also indicates a lack of self control, and loss of composure. The fact that the best angry expression she can muster is the rabbit nose sniff just indicates the poor quality of the actress on top of bad writing.

@davidstone-haigh4880

Жыл бұрын

she has the weirdest blank canvas of a face-the only mobile part is, as you say, the weirder still crunchy nose sniff thing

@diogenesthedog3985

Жыл бұрын

We had Superman. Now we have a lobotomized Robin.

@ttrev007

Жыл бұрын

i am not so quick to judge the actress. There are many aspects that the actress cannot control that can make her look incompetent without actually being incompetent. I would need to see her in other work before blaming her.

@GermanTaffer

Жыл бұрын

@@ttrev007 Well, Blanchett is the best female actor I am aware of . At least , if excellent actors play in a bad movie, they usually give the figure a soul. Usually they reject to play in bad films.

@beckyweiss6072

Жыл бұрын

The show was trying to sound Tolkenian in their dialogue and failed miserably. Most of the dialogue in the show was nothing but hot air. And this Galadriel...oh my god I have never seen such an unlikeable and immoral character in modern fantasy to date. I know in the books she did have ambition when she was younger, but this is beyond anything I've seen in the worst ways.

galadriel being menacing reminds me of a child trying to show how evil they are to look cool

@EdgarFriendlysCivicsTeacher

Жыл бұрын

I couldn't take her performance seriously in every scene she was a twitchy, swivel eyed paranoiac and not menacing in the slightest - she just comes across as mentally ill.

@kneelbeforezod2160

Жыл бұрын

Like a high school bully

@circedelune

14 күн бұрын

Her trying to be intimidating makes me 😂. And then I wonder why on earth the other characters aren’t rolling their eyes. It’s like a five-year-old threatening to hold their breath until they get their way.

One of the showrunners excused Galadriel's character by saying she reflects what he would be feeling in her situation. Which is already a terrible mindset to write them to have human emotions when Elves should be extremely experienced and borderline apathetic. Not only do they not understand writing but they also do not understand what they are writing.

@eddardstark6554

Жыл бұрын

That’s why George R. R. Martin is a great author/writer (among many others), as he inserts himself AS the characters and asks himself “what would I do if I WERE this character?” That means you need to think of what you’d do if you were them based on what you wrote and created for them to experience in their lives and perspectives (along with preferences, education levels, age, sex, experience, etc.) while disregarding your own. You can’t insert your own life preferences and experiences to influence the character’s actions and motives, rather you have to become them as if you were hypothetically them from their perspective, not your own.

@DoritoBot9000

Жыл бұрын

For real? Wow. Isn’t being able to create and emphasize with different characters basic storytelling? What a way to out oneself. Why even participate in such a project if it’s clearly not within their skillset?

@larrote6467

Жыл бұрын

@@eddardstark6554 that's basic storytelling dude. if your character is a fisher, would they use hunting analogies to explain the world?

@BWMagus

Жыл бұрын

@@eddardstark6554 That...doesn't really make sense. If you were a different race, sex, age, social class, with different education, values, social norms, and lived experiences, you wouldn't BE you, you'd be an entirely different person. And at that point, asking "What would this character do?" is exactly the same question as "What would I do if I was this person instead of myself?" I mean, it really just boils down to "What makes the most sense for this character to do, based on what we know about them?"

@williamroberts6803

Жыл бұрын

It’s because she can’t read large words.

It's actually very impressive that every decision they made in terms of story, and every line of dialogue they wrote stinks.

@Ewiril

Жыл бұрын

Actually, it is! In 5th grade, I was writing more coherent text than this... How the fuck did they managed this is beyond me.

@bottlethrower1544

Жыл бұрын

Its almost too perfect, like a Spinal Tap version of producing the worst possible re-imagining woke version of one the most beloved, treasured works of art.. its like parody bad

@porkflaps4717

Жыл бұрын

This is what happens when you think you can outsmart a literal genius and think you can tell his story better than he did. They actually said they were going to "tell the story Tolkien should have".. with that sort of hubris, every single decision you make will be the wrong one. Tolkien invented 6 languages for his works and Payne and McKay have half a credit a piece on a garbage Star Trek movie. These morons were doomed from jump street and they got exposed for the jokes they are for the entire world to see. Who could've guessed nobody likes when a corporation injects the greatest fictional literary work with woke identity politics and incompetent writing littered with pseudo intellectual gobbledygook that doesn't make sense?

@jennyjustjenny7634

Жыл бұрын

When my niece was 3 she told me a very weird story about a knight. She was pregnant and when she got the baby the knight throwed it far away cause he only loved her. Better story then RoP in my opinion.

@benjammin9471

Жыл бұрын

@@jennyjustjenny7634 the real question is did the baby float towards the light or sink into the darkness

SPOILER: You have to play the dialogue backwards, like a Pink Floyd album, to understand what they are saying

@devinfan3448

Жыл бұрын

while on acid

As a Swede I can say one statement is false, we don’t actually ”live” without sun during the dark winter - we become depressed undead who constantly comment on the dark weather at work and then get revived again during spring! Great video btw!!

@Tetragnathidae

Жыл бұрын

As another Swede, I concur. Seasonal depression starts to set in during late October and doesn't really let up until around early February, when the nice snow arrives where I live.

@DaN-ri7eh

Жыл бұрын

exercise is the perfect remedy

@sarl2121

Жыл бұрын

@@DaN-ri7eh SAD isn't normal depression, and image going for a run in rural Alaska in the winter at night, which lasts nearly all of the day

@DaN-ri7eh

Жыл бұрын

@@sarl2121 no go to the temple of iron and test your steel

@Eemi_Seppala

Жыл бұрын

From your eastern bordering neighbour: Same.

I am so thankful this dropped into my recommended. RoP needed that very French way of mocking, ironic, dismissive, passive-aggressive and deeply insulting critique... So perfect

@maximedurante7574

Жыл бұрын

That's what we do best. We kind of are the real world equivalent of the elves in that respect.

“Your friend has arrived” “Why didn’t you say!” “Errrr I just did”

"Was there anything else?" "Yes. Your friend has arrived." "She's here? Why didn't you say so?" Top tier comedy right there

@scambammer6102

Жыл бұрын

whos on first?

I still can’t get over “the sea is always right” I keep contrasting it in my head to the burial at sea in House Of The Dragon and how much cooler they made the mystical connection to the ocean sound there.

@C_Nic

Жыл бұрын

THIS☝️! Also, the Greyjoys saying, “We do Not Sow” and “What is Dead May Never Die” in GoT sounded way more cool Edit: Now that I think about it, I really feel like the part where they were chanting “The Sea is Always Right” on the beach was copied from a VERY similar scene with the Greyjoys

@jennyjustjenny7634

Жыл бұрын

​@@C_Nic The scene that comes to my mind: Season 2, epsode 1 where Stannis burns the 7 gods. Melisandre says "The night is dark and full of terrors" and everyone standing there repeats it. It happens on the beach of Dragonstone.

@jennyjustjenny7634

Жыл бұрын

It makes no sense. And what confused me even more: They say "the sea is always right" but than they wear clothes that should portray the later Rohirrim (what is wrong in and off itself) and say they're also great horsemen? What now? Sea or land? Stay consistent!

@SarcasticPlotRecaps

Жыл бұрын

i mocked this in my videos too, including the recent HOTD roast vid. It reminds me of Hot Fuzz and THE GREATER GOOD!

@sarl2121

Жыл бұрын

This is the Way

"Give me the meat and give it to me raw." I was expecting Archer to pop out of the bushes and scream "Phrasing!"

@marikroyals7111

Жыл бұрын

Hearing and reading that sentence all I can think of is Archer yelling "HEY, PHRASING".

Payne and McKay’s ex girlfriends looking at old love letters be like: “yup, saw this coming”

@hydrohasspoken6227

Жыл бұрын

Boyfriends maybe?

I'm more amazed by the fact there are people defending the writing.

@stephengibbons4771

Жыл бұрын

There are people out there with amazingly low standards...

@yohanespaskal9352

Жыл бұрын

@@stephengibbons4771 low standards? they don't have any standard lol

@hydrohasspoken6227

Жыл бұрын

The world is full of low room temperatures IQs.

@jdf3972

Жыл бұрын

The only people I’ve seen actually defending ROP were probably amazon shills. I still don’t know a single person who enjoyed it. and this is from a fairly large circle of lotr fans (friends and family)

@NCRRanger7753

Жыл бұрын

It's the desperatly untalented or inexperienced believing that they are entitled to a high wage job. Being included in a project that deals with a highly popular franchise. They then insert themselves and write their Dragonball Z/World of Warcraft superpower fantasies. In short, cringe filled fan fiction.

Anyone else creeped out by her brother, not just the Sauron one, the original too?

@jonahlamond8648

Жыл бұрын

They did my boy finrod dirty.

@SarcasticPlotRecaps

Жыл бұрын

i said he has a there's something about mary hairstyle in my vid which was super distracting lol

@SilhouetteSE

Жыл бұрын

Oh, you've nailed it! 👍 The actor bothered me a lot, there's something off about him... He gave off a Nazi Youth vibe.

@marcoarenaza54

Жыл бұрын

And Finrod is arguably the number 1 favorite character of most Middle Earth long time fans.

@Kat-gp6gj

Жыл бұрын

Finrod is supposed to be among the most beautiful of the elves! He's practically an angel. And they cast this ugly dude and gave him this hideous bouffant hairdo. WHY?!?

The whole 'evil is cold' nonsense still rubs me the wrong way. Morgoth was implied to be a god of fire before he fell, Tolkien uses words like fire, flames, lava, ash, smoke and dragons to describe him and his calamities. Sauron is also implied to be a spirit of flames, especially with his affinity to fires, forging and volcanoes. Not to mention Balrogs.

@DoritoBot9000

Жыл бұрын

Not only that, but elves are not affected by the cold.

@blaxpoitation8528

Жыл бұрын

Add to that, that in the end, the orks set off an explosion and live at the foot of a VOLCANO. This series was so abysmal.

@SRWhitting

Жыл бұрын

The frozen north is actually the result of Morgoth. The grinding ice the elves cross is because of Morgoth. The harsh winters of Forodwaith are blamed on the power of the Witch King, and in summer - his power is weaker. The winter even brings evil to the shire - that's when orcs and wolves attack. Cold, for Tolkien is direct result of evil. Whereas fire isn't evil but it is perilous. Gandalf, just like sauron is a spirit of fire - which is probably why he was chosen to go to Middle Earth and aid in the fight against Sauron. And the secret fire is the spirit of Illuvatar himself, and it's what Morgoth most desired. For Tolkien, the fires of Morgoth and Sauron are the result of good falling to evil, and the cold is the absence of good. Even Dante put Satan in coldest depths of hell, so this notion is both Tolkienian and Catholic - which is redundant. Also this show is not even worth watching - I'm in no way defending it. Nevertheless, cold being evil is so far off from nonsense.

@elmerthiendoesgames9061

Жыл бұрын

One of the first thing Morgoth did was attempt to encroach upon Ulmo's domain through frost. So at least it makes more sense than water being evil.

@helenwhs

Жыл бұрын

Morgoth brings both extreme heat and cold, which Eru points out brings out Ulmo’s beauty in rain (from water vapour) and frost.

One of the rare reviews I have watched that doesn't fawn over the Durin/Elrond relationship. Their relationship makes no sense. The banishment being thrown down the mine. The grandiose promises that Elrond betrays by a clumsy denial. Which he then later defends the fact he never betrays secrets/trust. This is not good friendship. They constantly doubt, and spy on each other. Use deception, etc. Thank you for underlining all this and much more.

@davidstone-haigh4880

Жыл бұрын

yep-truly terrible character building/dire-logue

@datzfatz2368

Жыл бұрын

I think most people give those two more of a pass because the actors seem to at least have fun and chemistry with each other (unlike most of the cast) but yeah, other then that i dont get it either

@BWMagus

Жыл бұрын

I think their first interactions were okay. This video doesn't like them, but I at least appreciate the idea of exploring the different perspectives of a mortal and an immortal to events like marriage and having kids, the things that mark our numbered days, or simply how they view something like 20 years, a fairly long time in which much can happen. It had a spark of creativity, and wasn't up it's own asshole or overly dramatic, and it was something we could relate to. And it highlighted the lack of empathy elves can have, their high-mindedness, which perhaps is a good connection to Elrond of the future who, despite his misgivings about men, is still compassionate towards them. I dunno, it was just something not total shit, and if the show had all been of that caliber, may have at least been tolerable fan-fiction, not a way to piss on Tolkien's grave.

“Where now are the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? Where is the helm and the hauberk, and the bright hair flowing? Where is the harp on the harpstring, and the red fire glowing? Where is the spring and the harvest and the tall corn growing? They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow; The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow. Who shall gather the smoke of the deadwood burning, Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning?” Amazon: The sea is always right.🙄😒

Galadriel was one of the wisest and fairest of all eleves. Tolkien marked her "unusual" and of the same powerful nature as the great "F Name" elves who fought Morgoth. These showrunners don't understand how willpower magic works in Tolkien. Galadriel could fight, certainly, her father gave her the name Nerwen because she had the height and strength of a male elf. But her greatest powers were in using her mind, knowledge, and willpower. With those she crafted magical items, kept Sauron's forces at bay, read minds, grew monstrous trees in Lothlorien, and even pulled down the fortress of Dol Guldur. Why did she need swords?

@an6153

Жыл бұрын

It is said in the "Shibboleth of Feanor" that she fought in Alqualonde. Why would she not wield a sword? Because the thought of warrior woman makes you uncomfortable? Finrod also has great willpower knowledge etc., yet he very much uses a sword.

@farahwyn8733

7 ай бұрын

@@an6153 "because the thought of a warrior woman makes you uncomfortable"? 🤣🤣 Let me ask you this, if Galadriel is indeed a "warrior woman" then surely all fans could and would agree to that statement. It's "safer" to say that you assume she's a "warrior woman" because you can and you wanted to. That's ok lol. But don't ask embarrassing questions like that. If Tolkien did gave us clear direct passages of Galadriel wielding swords or whatever her choice of weapon is, then fine, she's a warrior woman. If he never said anything clear, then she's not. 🤣 Deal with it. Don't you bother me with all those vague quotes of her badass mother-name or how she fought in Alqualonde. Well, then HOW did she fought in Alqualonde then? Did she 1v1 Feanor? Did she ACTIVELY participate in the kinslaying? What are her specific warrior feats?

I didn't watch it, the only scene I saw from this show was the one with the Rock and the Boat metaphor and it felt like every critical thinking bone in my body was screaming in pain. TvTropes has a trope called the Ice-Cream Koan, a Koan is a chinese riddle that inspires contemplation and an Ice-Cream Koan is something that *sounds* wise like a contemplative riddle but when you stop to think about it for two seconds the logic falls apart, I've never seen a live example of that until I heard that Stone and Ship line.

1 Billion dollars for a show, and yet they skip the idea of hiring an actual good scriptwriter.

''there is a tempest in me'' is my favourite

@siggilinde5623

Жыл бұрын

I need a parody where someone had too much Chili and looks at someone with wannabe Galadriels facial expression and goes "there is a tempest in me!"

@mellis2821

Жыл бұрын

It’s particularly awful considering it’s plagiarized from Elizabeth: The Golden Age. The ROP writers clearly just binged the Cate Blanchett filmography and thought that copypasting her dialogue would imbue their Galadriel with the same power. It didn’t

@ragalthor

Жыл бұрын

I'd have a tempest too if I had taco bell.

@TheNotoriousNemo

6 ай бұрын

Same lol. So dumb lol

"Do you know why a ship floats, and a stone sinks? The stone is rough and unfinished, and has no purpose. A ship has been constructed by someone who has given purpose to the ship..." That's off the top of my head, and I think it's already a bit better...

@candidwings5609

Жыл бұрын

I like it! Here's mine: "A stone is of earth and will sink until it meets its kin. A ship is a union of earth and air, and as both earth and air seek their kin, they hold each other fast upon the surface of the deep, neither sinking nor flying. We craft ships in balance with their elements. As we grow, we can seek to find balance within ourselves also. We are not stones made of one element, nor are we crafted vessels, but we are connectioned to the world. The light and the shadow both hold power and beauty, but there is nothing so powerful as a being in harmony with herself. " The stone and ship are still dumb lol but I think that's at least a bit more logical and then flows more rationally into a metaphor about life that could become a thematic element for her character

@alexfriedman918

Жыл бұрын

You’ve both put more thought into this paragraph than the writers did into the entire season!

This just came in: "buoyancy, it's a secret... "

I literally always understand him saying "Do you know why a shit floats but a stone can not..."

Why is one Elf a super warrior as we may expect from creatures thousands of years old wise with experience and defeating an evil once already, but every other Elf is a pathetic weak useless and devoid of any knowledge on how to fight or even behave like an Elf as they behave like some bunch of shop keepers running in panic from the taxman

@benjammin9471

Жыл бұрын

We all know what the answer is.

@AS-fu1kd

Жыл бұрын

In the modern era the only storyline allowed in media is strong woman boss in love with evil is strong; man dumb.

Ships float because they are made of wood, what else floats? A duck! Logically, if Galadriel weighs the same as a duck... she's made of wood, and therefor... she's a witch.

4:50 I almost choked laughing, this really illustrates how absurd the original dialogue is. "Why is the rabbit evil? I dunno" lmao

My favourite part was in the finale where they had a moment to leave budget Gandalf's decision to become good to the subtext by *showing* him beating the baddies but then actually had him SAY he was "good" because we're dealing with millenial hack writers bro

@stargazerspark4499

Жыл бұрын

"budget gandalf" lol, i was hoping he was one of the blue wizards mentioned by tolkien but that's probably asking too much of the writers. im glad he declared his alignment in advance, if female eminem and their cohort along with sauron could announce "we're the baddies" that would clear up any remaining ambiguity for the viewers.

FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT I told some of my friends who were watching the show that I gave up after the scene with the troll because the dialogue was tooooo cringe lol They didn't believe that it was that bad and I couldn't explain exactly why it sucked so much but know I can send them THIS THANK YOU hahahaha

@HNCS2006

Жыл бұрын

Yes. I gave up after the troll scene too. I gave the first episode two chances. Both I was defeated by the abyssmal quality of writing and the blatant attempt to make things sound impressive and serious and awesome when everything was so dumb. It just felt like a cheap knock off of Peter Jackson's films.

@davidstone-haigh4880

Жыл бұрын

that's how far I got to-what with the leaving members of her party to die and wearing a party frock with ring mail accessories in a snow storm....the slippery slop of WTF? was well under way

Finally! You were the first one (even among the harshest critics) to point out Elrond sounds/acts manipulative toward Dúrin! I totally agree. It played like a fake, one-sided relationship to me.

Awesome video, especially when you put the text up and broke down the sentences and re-jigged them to make more sense. It really showed how easy it is and how incompetent the writers are. I hope you do more videos like this! God knows there's more stupid RoP content to dissect.

@SarcasticPlotRecaps

Жыл бұрын

Did you see in the finale they had a moment to leave budget Gandalf's decision to become good to the subtext by showing him beating the baddies but then actually had him SAY he was "good" because we're dealing with millenial hack writers bro

@hyteclowlife

Жыл бұрын

It's like they had a minimum word count and just threw in as much pointless dialogue as they could to reach it

28:38 Galadriel is threatening her in this scene. Galadriel is saying she's willing to spill the queen's blood to get a ship. Which is even more confusing that a threat against the queen isn't taken seriously.

Noone in the Lead-Writing and -Production Staff actually has enough experience with filmmaking. The two "Showrunners" ("Writers") only had *1* other Project (Star Trek: Beyond) and they were not even credited for their work and the Lead-Producer has only about 5 Projects under her Belt. And those guys were in charge of this Multi-Million Dollar Operation. For me that is just insane.

@amateurbarnaby

Жыл бұрын

I dont even know why they ghosted Peter Jackson. Early on they probably realized how shitty the series is going to be and their just hiding behind the diversity shield.

@jenniferariesta6464

Жыл бұрын

This is the most baffling thing. Is this a money laundering scheme so they won’t hire actual seasoned people on it? 🤔

@tototats16

Жыл бұрын

@@amateurbarnaby From what I've heard, the Tolkien Estate didn't like his LOTR trilogy, and the showrunners wanted to be separate from PJ's films.

@amateurbarnaby

Жыл бұрын

@@tototats16 The Tolkien Estate didn't like it but the masses do. The trilogy has been winning awards left and right. Christopher Tolkien was critical with PJ's work, i mean if he sees RoP he would furious since he wrote the lore together with his Father. I even heard that RoP's production started when Christopher Tolkien died at least in PJ's side he was more loyal to the lore, he couldn't exactly adapt all of the book into the movie as there were time and budget constraints.

@amateurbarnaby

Жыл бұрын

@@tototats16 The Tolkien Estate actually was the one who wanted to be separate. They greenlighted the Amazon show with one condition and that is that it should not have any connection with PJ's films.

The allegorical dialogue is some of the worst, and most forced, I've seen in a big production. On the level of Z-grade homemade movies on a hand held camera.

@thorinpalladino2826

Жыл бұрын

And a complete rejection of Tolkien. He absolutely loathed allegory.

The elrond durin thread is even more perplexing when the show tells us elrond is some "great diplomat" yet he doesnt even visit "his friend" durin in 20 years? Why? Doesnt say. If he can just walk to khazad dum on a whim. Why would he not visit now and then? Makes zero sense

@Mareckoo123

Жыл бұрын

Wasn't it 50 years ?

@BWMagus

Жыл бұрын

I think the point is that it doesn't occur to Elrond. 20 years is, to him, no big deal; it's like he was there yesterday. Because that's how it probably is with elves; catch up after a century, no biggie.

@cyberpunkbuilds

Жыл бұрын

@@BWMagus no. A year is a year. Elves dont "move faster" or perceive time as moving faster. A day is 24 hours whether elf or human. If anything Elves are smart enough to know that and not disregard important friendships or strategic allies. Making a scene as if elves are stupid, careless beings who lose track of time and friends is just stupid.

I did try watching this show. But 5 minutes in, when the brother started talking about why stones don’t float, I turned that dumpster fire off and never looked back. Silly me! I thought stones didn’t float because their mass is greater than that of water!

Tolkien would VOMIT if he saw RoP.

"No elf have been here since elves were last here, and you ruined that by bringing an elf here." That's not exclusive to this show, but I always love that sort of thinking and talking.

This show says to me; tell me you're pretentious without telling me your pretentious.

If you are going to abandon basic plot structure, you'd better have a well planned psychological map in its stead (like David Lynch films), and if you are going to deviate wildly from the source material, you'd better have a vision that is wider and deeper than the original (like Kubrick in the Shining). Suffice it to say, the ROP showrunners are certainly no Lynch or Kubrick.

@BWMagus

Жыл бұрын

Kubrick didn't, but I see your point.

"If a rabbit ate a lot of carrots would it float?" I love how this random throw-away joke is more worth exploring than entirety of the RoP's plot.

I'm getting addicted to watching intelligent, coherent, video essays like this. Love it. Totally demolished the juvenile writing of RoP.

Thank you for organising and putting into words, so many things I have found baffling about this show. Your style of commentary is very funny and entertaining.

36:10 I can't be the only one that has a real problem with that pile of helmets.

Wow, I couldn't describe what it was that made the dialogue irritating to me, but you really helped me figure out what it was. It was twofold, it was the "Question that is super important to the story?" followed immediately by "A poor figure of speech that is not an answer to the question" and bad habit of repeating an unimportant word from the line that was just spoken to sound "poetic."

With all the depth that's lacking and drama that just isn't there it leads to so much over acting, like with the whole "tempest in me" bit; not to mention Guyladriel 's constant face twitching. I kept thinking she was about to have a stroke! So stupid. I also hate that pile of helmets that isn't even feasible. How is it so high without collapsing?

@BWMagus

Жыл бұрын

Elves have mad jenga skills, bro.

@circedelune

14 күн бұрын

How did she get the ones on top? Where is her ladder? She had nothing better to do with her time than stack helmets for the hours, if not days, it would take? She actually robbed dead bodies of their helmets because she thought it would be cool to make a helmet mountain? What happened when family members showed up to claim the bodies and found they had been robbed by Galadriel? Is Galadriel a psychopath? So many questions.

I feel like today’s “entertainment” is in how bad it is,I find it interesting that sometimes I’d just to watch garbage,crashing and burning instead of some popular,recommended shows.

The whole "touching darkness" bit makes me mad. It's written to suggest that Galadriel had to reject the "heavenly lihht" to chase her dark mission to hunt orcs... but in the end when she rids the world of the evil darkness of orcs and Sauron, then she will have proven that the path of the lights in the water were the real lights she needed to follow. It is very "ends justify the means" which is so not what a Tolkien hero does.

They used miles as a unit of measurement in one episode and I about had an aneurysm

I'm sure ya could get more compelling dialogue from throwing a tin of alphabetti spaghetti against a wall and transcribing the results.

The wedding invitation and birth announcements werelost in the mail. The MEPS just isn't what it used to be.

After she says you have not seen what I have seen, ever time she gets in trouble I would ask, didn’t you see that? Now that would be a funny running joke and kinda a slap down against her egotistical personality.

Excellent breakdown of the dialogue. Subconsciously I could tell that there was something terribly wrong with everything that everyone said but could not quite figure out what it was. My family and I "hate-watched" through the entire ROP series, and every conversation was so unbearable we almost quit many times lol

A ship floats because...A WITCH!!

I literally suffered through the ship and the stone monologue then turned off the show. True story.

an AI wrote the script i swear

@ExxylcrothEagle

Жыл бұрын

Likely

@candidwings5609

Жыл бұрын

AI might have done better than this.... it would be a fun experiment

@alexfriedman918

Жыл бұрын

In that case, the AI would have failed the Turing Test! And so did the writers…

"Nothing is evil in the beginning" *Ungoliant - Am I just a joke to you! *Morgoth - Hold my beer!

"If the rabbit were to eat a lot of carrots, would it float?" - and here we genuinely arrived at something I like to call "Monty Python Science".... it's glorious XD

Great video. I would describe the dialogue as pseudo-profundity. What the writers think sounds profound and deep is actually profoundly shallow.

As someone who lives in Sweden I can confirm that we live without sunlight

24:49 That thought occurred to me two. Dwarves are not exactly short-lived. And, excellent points about the question of whether Durin sent an invitation or why he never visited Elrond, points I've not noticed raised elsewhere. If the writers don't care to answer these questions, why should the viewer care about these characters? Anyway, this dialogue is supposed to be in a book Tolkien never wrote? Who could imagine Tolkien writing this drivel?

Not sure about anyone else, but with how much they try to push "The sea is always right!!", this popped into my head after the conversation between Galadriel and Elendil: "What happened to your wife?" "She drowned." ...... "THE SEA IS ALWAYS RIGHT!"

I find it difficut to believe there was not a single dialogue expert in the writing room to oversee this. Dialogue its the most important part of any story, whether it's a book, a movie or a TV series. With so much money invested, they could have hired the best of everything, better writers, better actors and better show runners. It's almost as if despite their boast of a billion dollars, they actually did it on the cheap.

imo the reason why some people (me included) liked the Durin-Elrond stuff (more than the rest of the show), is not because it holds up well. it is because on the surface it works and the two characters/actors have chemistry and one could emphasize a little with the two. of course if you look deeper into it (and let's be honest, you don't have to look all that far) it falls apart just as the rest of the writing does. but the difference is, that the rest of the writing doesn't even make sense on the surface. so in comparison the Durin-Elrond stuff feels at least a little better. that said, it's not good either and it's an absolute shame that the "best" part of the writing is still mediocre at best, and a travesty at worst. I really wonder where the budget went.. definitely not to the writers.

it wouldn't take much effort to convince me that the writers of this show are aliens trying to guess how humans talk.

I've never seen anything on television with dialogue that so closely resembles literal fanfiction. Which is an insult to fanfiction, because plenty of it is technically better than RoP

Only sociopaths can not distinguish good from bad ... insert self-projection of the "writers" here

12:00 This entire part about temperature is the embodiment of the writer's philosophy: "Anything that makes me uncomfortable is EVIL."

"The sea is always right" isn't necessarily a bad line, not really much different than "winter is coming." But they just don't develop it enough to make it feel like the characters really live by it or even vaguely believe in it.

Thank you for articulating what I've been feeling about this awful, awful show. I've been saying, "It feels so dumbed down," "contrived," "insults my intelligence," etc. but couldn't really pinpoint so eloquently.

Bears almost NO relationship to Tolkien's writing or world building. MILDLY entertaining on a very shallow level. But, its very hard to understand what's going on and I am something of a Tolkien nerd so I should be able to follow pretty easily.

Ishmael Cordova is an absolutely horrible terrible actor. The only thing worse is Disa's accent.

"The rock sinks because it always looks down" is still one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. Every stone on the surface of the Earth is "looking up" just as much as "looking down". What an awful line that is. 🤮🤮🤣🤣

"Good Smeagol always helps!"

Awesome video Sir...only 210 subs??? How can this be! Keep up the good work and you will go far! Thank you!

There was once a time long ago before the light had risen, before darkness came into the world. A time when rocks looked up towards the light then down wards towards the darkness. A time when Rings of Power was never thought of.

How do you swim without sinking? Because you’re looking up when you swim. But brother I swim on my stomach looking down. Oh shut up Galadriel.

I'm hoping you make more vids this was great. There's plenty more bad writing for dumb scenarios for you to pilfer through.

At this point the only sensible or logical thing to do would be for 4m4z0n to completely replace what they have, the entire crew and system they have in place, the people, etc. And instead of a season 2, redo the show from the beginning. The concept of a reboot of a franchise, like for games, but simply applied to this industry. They are the only ones that could pull that off with all that money. Just scrape that dog sh*t from our collective figurative shoe, and clean and disinfect the shoe. A fluid simulation, or virtual light transport do NOT do a show, by themselves. It's like they expect people to be hypnotized or something by the CGI EFX.

the inanimate object looks only downward, but the other inanimate object has a secret and can gaze not just downward but up... I feel like they were going for a metaphor without truly understanding how metaphors work.

1:17 To this day, I still have no idea WTF the kids or Elrond are saying for that code.

Well, at least we got news today that Payne and McKay are being sidelined. Season 1 was such a dumpster fire between the absolute perversion and inversion of Tolkien's texts with woke writing and bad writing, the bad direction, cheap effects, cheap costumes, and then there was the actors and Amazon's gaslighting and ridicule of the fandom because they didn't like it. It was a perfect storm of shite. I kind of wished they kept the showrunners and it kept going off the rails for Season 2 because they already ruined the story, may as well be entertained watching it crash and burn..A man can hope. Great vid though thank you!

@FlyfishermanMike

Жыл бұрын

It's just a rumor but hopefully true. However, I don't see how anyone could salvage this mess without starting over.

@blaxpoitation8528

Жыл бұрын

@@FlyfishermanMike But could they actually have the balls to start over? It's true, they don't have much wiggle room to play with. Either they build on what they've already established/ruined, they attempt to course correct ala The Last Jedi, or they do a hard reboot. Start from scratch. And hope fans forgive/ forget.

@no-oz2hr

Жыл бұрын

STOP USING WOKE TO DESCRIBE THINGS

@porkflaps4717

Жыл бұрын

Rings of Power is WOKE TRASH

Excellent deconstruction of this abomination of a show... I have subscribed to you now. Thank you for your time and effort in this - I know it must have been agonizingly painful for you to watch and try to make sense of it.

What "sometimes we can not know until we touch the darkness" really means is "The Ends Justify the means"

the short haired elves, why???

"-Ye know, stone sinks & ships floats, Guyladriel..." - "-No way!?" - "-..." / 😅

The touch the darkness line is so unbelievably dumb because it just sows so much confuse into the message of the story. Galadriel is a bad person, her actions lead to destruction, it’s her inability to let go off her revenge (symbolized by her dagger) that causes Sauron’s return. But by portraying the brothers opinion of, “sometimes you have to do evil to achieve good.” as anything other than destructive, it paints Galadriels choice to jump off the ship as a good act. For Christ sake, Sauron literally repeats the line to her at the end of the show to demonstrate how evil it is yet the writers still thought it was wise to portray her brother as wise.

I genuinely hope none of the creative minds behind this show ever find work again.

"maybe we'll get a prequel to the prequel of the prequel to the original trilogy... can't wait..." oh god the fact i can see it coming, doesn't make it any better ...

No wonder the elven people were doomed. They believed stones (rocks) have eyes that cause them to sink. If every elf was that smart, their culture was doomed.

When a person whose first language isn’t English tells you how to fix your creative writing and your dialogue you shouldn’t be writing.

"How can there be living flesh where even sunlight fears to tread?" "Sunlight"?? Light.....from the..sun...?? I'm no lore guy...but doesn't their light come from the trees..? Isn't there...no sun yet..?

@Twinrehz

Жыл бұрын

No, that part is from several thousand years after the trees were destroyed by Morgoth. The destruction of the trees are from part of the lore that Amazon doesn't have the rights for :P

"What's going on inside the writer's mind?" *crickets* *did my paycheck clear yet?* *who can I blame for what I wrote* *I'd read the books if I owned them*