i'm so so sorry for what you're going through with your counsellor and the doctor. i can relate and that hurts so deeply and it's so hard because i usually feel ashamed also because i feel like i shouldnt be reacting that way. But there is nothing shameful about feelings. It hurts so bad though and i understand why you would feel like needing to act on it somehow. I hope you can find a way to be gentle with yourself though. You've been through so much with hour ED and you don't deserve to have to go through it all again and have more of your life stolen and destroyed and have your body damaged and lose your hair and all of that. OmYou are in pain and thst deserves compassion and kindness and comfort, not more pain and abuse. But i know that sometimes it feels impossible not to hurt yourself. I wish there was some way to make it easier for you. I'm so sorry you have to feel this. Sending hugs oxoxoxoxoxoxo

I just feel so bad for you I might annoy you with my comments bit please keep fighting your too beautiful to stop it xoxo

You may consider to lower some of your personal goal(s). I would understand that "control" and "high achievement" are characters of anorexia patients; according to my prior education in psychology. So, I would advice that you can "let go" and lowering some of your personal goals, so that you do not need to control all the time. Of course, you better talk with your counsellor or doctor about the matter. God Bless for good health for you!! :)

Wait did what to you?

i'm so so sorry for what you're going through with your counsellor and the doctor. i can relate and that hurts so deeply and it's so hard because i usually feel ashamed also because i feel like i shouldnt be reacting that way. But there is nothing shameful about feelings. It hurts so bad though and i understand why you would feel like needing to act on it somehow. I hope you can find a way to be gentle with yourself though. You've been through so much with hour ED and you don't deserve to have to go through it all again and have more of your life stolen and destroyed and have your body damaged and lose your hair and all of that. OmYou are in pain and thst deserves compassion and kindness and comfort, not more pain and abuse. But i know that sometimes it feels impossible not to hurt yourself. I wish there was some way to make it easier for you. I'm so sorry you have to feel this. Sending hugs oxoxoxoxoxoxo