No more fear of life | Marnix Pauwels | TEDxArnhem
Fear exists only in your mind. And Marnix Pauwels got scared ,not from what was actually happening in his life, but he got scared of the thought what could happen in his life.
Copywriter. Singer. Writer. Lover of life. Former addict. Spiritual realist. Very much in contact with my essence. Mindtraveler. Boob fan.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx
Пікірлер: 328
I am going through this right now... fear of life, aging, single, past and future... fear of life every moment and life...
@awesomeanimals2668
4 жыл бұрын
William M exactly what I’ve been going through for about 3 months
@johnisasexyname
4 жыл бұрын
For me its fear of my loved ones not being happy and i just cant feel happy with out them being happy
@khaos1185
4 жыл бұрын
Me too exactly like you I thought I was the only one fear of a lot things it stops me from being happy it sucks
@johnisasexyname
4 жыл бұрын
@@khaos1185 do you believe in a God? Or any religion?
@khaos1185
4 жыл бұрын
@@johnisasexyname I believe in God just not in religion it's complicated
a wise man said " humans never suffer life, they just suffer their own emotion"
@mladendenni7062
Жыл бұрын
wtf
@Gydjulind
4 ай бұрын
I’d rather say: ‘they just suffer THINKING ABOUT their own emotion’.
I want to hug this guy.
"I was scared of my 'THOUGHTS' about life...." Fear, Guilt, Shame will never disappear until you face them directly....! FEAR IS ABOUT STORIES in our head.
@sandeepnagra9652
4 жыл бұрын
O
@sandeepnagra9652
4 жыл бұрын
Gy
@arandomperson2975
4 жыл бұрын
@@sandeepnagra9652 ?
@brattsrbija
4 жыл бұрын
how to face my fears ?
@evasall6901
3 жыл бұрын
@@brattsrbija I wanna know to? How do you face your fears?
I can not be my thoughts when I witness them. That's gold insight.
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
It is, right!
Single best vid to watch if you are struggling with anxiety.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much!
i rly needed dis video cuz everyday i’m so afraid of life n what will go wrong everyday...to make da fear go away i wonder if i should jus take myself out of dis world
@Rudeboii1k
3 жыл бұрын
Noooo that’s never to right thing to do
@aliveandwell3958
3 жыл бұрын
You belong here.
@Nick_Taylor.
2 жыл бұрын
Stay
@gabrielacolumna1830
2 жыл бұрын
No fear should never equate to your life. Fear is a figure of your imagination. You are a being in present reality. You are worth every ounce of this life
@Malaysiannightmare1969
Жыл бұрын
@@gabrielacolumna1830 and who is valuating us?
I am so impressed with the sincerity of this real guy with his real felings ! I am grateful !
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot!
@bibinjacob846
2 жыл бұрын
Same feeling
When he said stop thinking, I ended up holding my breath. .__.
I wish I could thank this man some way. I keep coming back to this ted talk after completing more and more college. Just over a year and a half I watched this in a detox center and came to the great realization I could overcome all the BS that comes with alcoholism. His message also makes much more sense after taking philosophy and reading some books on it a year and a half later.
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Well, you have just thanked me :) And I want to thank you back, and congratulate you on your insights and the obvious power of your journey. Keep transcending the BS my man!
I really need to hear this from this guy. I struggle with fear and hearing the guy has really helped me think about fear differently.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for sharing this!
This is amazing to see. He truly is a real warrior. Not many people get out of drugs and depression but real warriors do.
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
Thanks, I like the sound of that! :)
@tiagoribeiro885
Жыл бұрын
Some warriors die in batlles, you can't generalize. He is a great story, but some souls fought and perished.
@kennedynjuguna
Жыл бұрын
@@tiagoribeiro885 yes that's so real.
“Things like fear are often an illusion”
@darrenwalshe8513
4 жыл бұрын
Everything is an illusion xx
Going through this right now. Fear of traveling to places that are out of my routine. Fear of death comes up all of the time…it’s agitating because I’m not living.
God, this man describes my life so accurately that it's scary.
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Believe me: there are millions and millions of people out there living in fear or at least some pretty tough form of anxiety. It's very, very common, and getting rid of it is way less complicated than you might think! I wish you all the inspiration and good nudges in the world to realize that you're actually safe, okay and awesome!
@110Hiba
Жыл бұрын
Just try step by step to come out. You can do that.
I'm in this situation too it's like I'm addicted to being depressed I really need to start meditating actually set a time and force myself to just sit in silence and focus on the breath for as long as possible as it does actually work very well. me too sick of hiding from the brain...
@PEGF4MG
6 жыл бұрын
Paul Freeman - how are you going with the meditation?
@mohammadifrahim
5 жыл бұрын
Paul, have you improved?
@sempressfi
4 жыл бұрын
Hope things are going well 💜
@AlbionRising
4 жыл бұрын
Meditation and wim HOF method of breathing similar to yogic breathing but it all rewires your patterns. Anxiety depression become a pattern so is not just random. You need to get to the core. Try it out !
@blowintrees4885
3 жыл бұрын
Habits can be hard to build, especially in a negative state. Just stick to it, you know the benefits and the purpose of it
Every thought come and go, but I stay. Thanks! That was so good!
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
Yup that's right, thanks for your response!
I instantly liked this man when I saw his shaking hand while telling his story.
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
Thanks, it was quite intimidating at the start!
He really explained this perfectly.. very happy I stumbled upon this tonight .
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
So cool that this is helpful for you!
Wow. You just brought light into my life. This is the most honest and relatable speech I've ever heard... THIS IS want I wanted.. sir.. wherever you are ..more strength to you.♥️
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for your beautiful words and share, really appreciate it!
@tousifk3138
2 жыл бұрын
@@MarnixPauwels can you help me
Great talk. My take is don’t hurt yourself because of bad thoughts. Address them and then dissolve them. Be positive and keep moving. I would like to add, “Count your blessings and ignore your miseries”. Good luck every one.
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Thanks Arif!
This talk reminds me very much of the book New Earth by Ekart Tolle i read it awhile ago. That book it's truly a masterpiece and it does underline the essential truth that we are not our thoughts that we are so used to believe we are , that so many times has let us into destructive behavior and depression.
@josegarcia303
4 жыл бұрын
We are beauty truly. We ar ehumble and hard working and forgiving. Thats what we are we are moving being that just happen to go through hard terrains... But if we saw the beautiful being wr have inside that wr can change lives and progress things would be amazing.
@disturbed1013
4 жыл бұрын
@Marten Dekker every intense emotion has a reason for it. You can express it if you want, until the next time it comes up again, but if you stop for a moment, and look deep inside, you'll find out what really is bothering you, and then you can do something about it, change it. And release it.
I just love Marnix's take on "thinking". I have recently concluded that I am what I believe. So, I have been putting a lot of time and energy into CONTROLLING my thoughts, instead of just SEPARATING myself from them, NOT INVESTING in them. I love this approach. It makes absolute sense. Thank all of you who have brought this wisdom to me. I was interested in finding Marnix's book "Free" in English. So far, I have only located Dutch copies of it. If anyone can help with this, I would appreciate it. Thank you.
For me--I have learned to take any fears in my life over time, and return them to my enemies times 10 each time. As time marches into the future--It tends to become overwhelming for those sources/peoples who try to put such things upon me--It in the now and forever future will be as such. My faith gives me my strength and backbone to do such. I see the world continuing to take shape in those places where such things happen and the world in general. Just my approach and full belief system.
I really needed this Marnix, thank you so much. I feel some hope and light in your words.
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
And you should!
when I find something interesting I have to share with people. you wanted me to stop thinking for a few minutes so I did. but when I opened my eyes, I only wanted to think of all the good things in my life. one of them was Robin Williams putting on one more show. I allowed him into my life a long time ago. he was funny and sometimes sad. but he always made people feel good about themselves just like you Mr Pauwels. I came to understand that I create my own problems, not spritualy but only in reality. people and actors tell stories and some are lived through experiences in a reality that we can't see, but the heart does I used to say that if I didn't think, I would have nothing to remember. But what good would that be to me? I wanted to live forever so I could help people get up through my life long experiences and lessons to give people a reason to live and love. but people get hooked on things that don't apply to living life. you said something about nature filling in the gaps? and so people do just that by filling it all in with rubish. people feel alone inside and out because we feel a higher purpose for living. This isn't all that I am. In fact this is just the beginning for me. so many people are heard on themselves because of failure. and some feel like they were in the wrong places at the wrong time. simply they need someone who understands. I know that I need someone that does.
You found your courage. It is not easy to let go of fear and doubt but you did it and I applaud you. Thank you for sharing your story. It, you, are inspirational.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much Violet!
Tht innocence coupled with honesty and truth...I'm ready to take this on...hats off yo this guy❤ May God bless u..
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much, my hat off for you too!
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
@SpaceSheep I believe in oneness, because that's what we fundamentally consist of. And I totally believe in finding that truth within a human experience. You can call it God if you want to!
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
@SpaceSheep Hi, well I think it believes in me, that's for sure! It's totally clear to me that we're essentially one, lost in the dream of being a separate being, so I feel very much guided and assisted by 'a higher power'!
I go back to this ted talk so many times. He has changed my life forever!
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Oh, wow, thanks so much Gabriela, that means a lot to me!
Incredible. Thank you Marnix pauwels your words hit home.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Sorry for responding so laten, but thanks and you are most welcome!
I'm saving this to "embrace the idear"
Bravo !! Beautifully said. I will open each envelope and make the amends that are so overdue. Thank you
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot Teresa, awesome!
I love your speeches! Your mind is so clear and in balance it makes me almost jealous.
@mkpoutopatrick1366
4 жыл бұрын
Lol🤣
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks Tonnie!
I was waiting for this all my life. Thank you my friend!
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
How cool, you are most welcome!
Thank you so much for the wonderful insight sir.. You have the brilliance in helping and giving the idea of freeing a fearful mind... I learned something from your experience. I salute you!
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for your thoughtful answer, I really appreciate it, and I love it that my talk was helpful!
Thank you so much, I really needed to hear your words
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
A littl late, this response, but thanks a lot and you are most welcome!
Great talk. Thank you Marnix Pauwels
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Awesome, you are very welcome!
I have been doing meditation off and on for ever and it still hasn't worked. I'm meditating on the Koan, "What is my original face before my mother and father were born?" There's no answer and briefly no thoughts which means pure awareness.. But when Marnix mentioned there's a distance between you and thought something clicked. It was like I had a tool! I brought up a trauma then thought, that's not me. It worked. My shoulders shook then relaxed. I notice when I address my thought my attention goes up to the "third eye" when IT says, "That's not me." Dank U wel, Marnix Pauwels.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Wow, so cool that you heard something that's helpful!
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for sharing your experience, this is really very touching!
Thank you so much ! Your voice is so calming and the speech is powerful !
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Sure thing, glad to be able to help a bit, thanks for letting me know!
Truth I’ve watched many many talks about anxiety and fear and this is the best . He is one of the only people I’ve seen that actually makes sense of fear and how best to deal with it. Please watch if you are struggling. Worth it!
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Wow, Justin, what a huge compliment, thanks so much!!
Thank you Marnix. You speak the truth from you heart. Thank You!
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks Mark, you are very welcome!
yes!! this guy!! and I stopped thinking for a minute. years of practice
@WILLYLYNCH.
4 жыл бұрын
You can't stop thinking.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks!
Loved hearing this.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
This is pure gold
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks!
Awesome!!.....Thank you for such sharing your amazing experience and insights!!...WoW!
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Cool, thanks, and you are most welome Peter!
Brilliant man and a brilliant way of explaining things
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Ooh, I really like that amount of brilliance, thanks!
definitely one of the best ted talks out there
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
Well, thanks very much!
Best TED talk I ever heard!
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks!
So inspiring! Thank you so much for this talk! I‘m still struggling with my envelopes and could never talk to anybody about it. I was too embarrassed .
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Hi Jessica, thanks for your response, and you are most welcome. I totally get your embarrassment, but let me tell you this: as a coach, I meet new people every day, and they ALL feel embarrassed and misunderstood and often lonely. You are not an anomaly, Jessica, it's just that most people hide their true feelings. I hope you will keep finding the courage to open you envelopes, and become a role model for others!
@jessicak4660
2 жыл бұрын
@@MarnixPauwels Thanks for letting me know! I really appreciate it! Inspired by your talk, I started addressing the problem, instead of avoiding it.
For me the letter in the beggining is existence and why we're here
God bless you man. You are amazing.
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much Ahmed, and bless you too!
great words, inspiring and right to the point.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot, Marcos!
I’m not Scared of dying I just have a fear of new thing, meeting people talking in Public and trying new things
@TheXuism
3 жыл бұрын
I have the same experience may help you out. I started at talking to passengers sit by my side on the bus . Just one sentence a time, gradually the fear of talking to strangers will decrease and even disappear.
Well done Marnix - an inspiration!!!
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot, John!
Thank You for sharing. Very Inspiring message !
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
You are most welcome, Joseph!
For the past 7 years I’ve been so paranoid and afraid to do things that I’ve learned to think how difficult it is to be alive. I’m healing and I’ve done the work but still everyday I think about how my day can go wrong. I lost my personality. Got into unloving/toxic relationships and began to hate myself. I’m tired of it and I want professional help because I have big dreams and goals but my negative thoughts control me
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
Go for it, professional help can make a huge difference!
Love thissss talk thank u Marnix
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks, you are most welcome!
thanks, it looked genuine and from the heart. Regards
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thank you, and you are most welcome!
What a great guy! ❤️
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks, you are great too!
The most important truth
I’m glad I stumbled onto this
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Cool, me too! Glad that it somehow does something for you!
Thank you so much!
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
You are most welcome Raul!
Great and super nice, smart guy. Loved his talk
@josegarcia303
4 жыл бұрын
You look like my English teacher form 10th grade!
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much Alessia!
My head was messing with me again. This helped me relax a little bit. Thank you :)
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
You're most welcome!
I thought I was fine but I was scared on the bus going home tonight. Its nice to know I'm not alone.
I'm afraid of everything. It's ruining my life. I have anxiety and depression. I know what he's saying is true, but it doesn't help the fear is there anyway..
@biancahernandez4885
Жыл бұрын
Same for me 😢
It makes me so happy just to hear that,
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
It makes me happy to read that it makes you happy!!
Loved this.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks!
thank you so much for this.
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
Sure thing!
Thank you sir
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Sure thing, Kris!
Your you Your thinking is from you inside. Try to ease or distract it in a good way. Be good and do good.
This is so real
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
You are so right!
sincere guy with wisdom about fear.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
I’m 18 and I feel this
Good speaking, and a very honest approach, I find fear fastinating, one mans fear is another man's excitement, we tend to fear things the more we hide from them, avoiding tells the protective parts of the mind that their must be a real threat because you are avoiding things, most fears come down to judgement on yourself and from other people, the thing is that what we think is personal and individual is usually offen very common it's just everyone hides what we believe weakness, and show our strength the real strength is showing up afraid, leaders are offen perceived as not having fear the truth is everyone is a afraid its just comes down to what degree you are afraid and what degree you try to hide it, most of us are baby's pretending to be adults, fair play great speech you can't have courage ever without fear we justify our feelings through stories.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot Adrian! Good comment!
Good talk and very wise advice
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot, Pauline!
I love these Ted Talks !
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Awesome, thanks!
You can either be a host to God (dao) or a hostage to your ego
Wonderful message 👍👍💞
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much, Diana!
How a 17 minute talk can be so enlightening...
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much!
Negative toughts sometimes are data about things are not so well in our lives or in our past.
Great!
Excellent speach and really resonates with me. Thank you. By the way marnix you look like mel gibson...
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks a lot, and I like the comparison :)
Awesome thank you
@MarnixPauwels
3 жыл бұрын
Sure thing Grant, you're welcome!
Great & motivating
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
Thanks Sunny !
As I'm writing this, I am afraid. Of writing a comment, Of tomorrow, of going back to work, of going to doctor to have my eye examined. But these are my thoughts. I should be able to observe them and not become them, not let them dictate me my life. Honestly it is difficult but I want to try to separate myself from them.
@rhondapelletier2141
2 жыл бұрын
Hope you faced your Fear, & found you could Handle it❤️🙏....... I’m in kinda safe place you were.....FEAR of virus ( as I am a germ Afobe during a pandemic!!!)..... The vax is not safe for me......
Fear is nothing but story.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Absolutely!
loved it ♡
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
I love that!
Great speach
@MarnixPauwels
Жыл бұрын
Thanks!
I am afraid, but i'm trying.
@kobygates
3 жыл бұрын
Im with you
@evasall6901
3 жыл бұрын
How are you now?
@katemurphy1905
3 жыл бұрын
@@evasall6901 much less anxious nowadays, thanks for asking
Ive been doing some of my own videos on this and you are right. :)
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Awesome, thanks!
All of humanities problems stem from fear
Good talk
@MarnixPauwels
2 жыл бұрын
Thank Stanley!
"Too many thoughts about failure; Possible.......... *[trembles...]* Blackouts." 😂 What an excellent joke 😁👌
Often Prayer helps;.. the Baha'i Writings has 100s of them. "Sometimes if the nervous system is paralysed through fear, a spiritual remedy is necessary." ~ Baha'i Faith
@KingE9047
4 жыл бұрын
Are you Francis the didi driver?
Amen
Thank you.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
You are very welcome, Adam!
the person is still in fear. although he has experienced a lot
@ancientbehemoth6448
5 жыл бұрын
Fear is a function of the Mind, so it is normal to be a part of you till you die. Active or present fears are what you are referring to. The fears we experience in the moment, or we have unresolved and keep repeating. So, there you have fear as the system and fear as the result of the system being triggered. You deal both with: - fears in the moment, that arise and are created now - and with fears that are already created, but are not resolved and are occurring again( it is the X time after the initial creation of that particular fear).
I want to get on this show.
It is basically true that what we think is not what we are. BUT; if one time in your life, one thought became obviously true, it became like a truth. If you tried to say something in front of people and you failed to say anything because you were too shy, then that thought cristalize and became a self prophetie. The next time you try, that though of failure will be stronger and if you fail again...that little voice will tell you; I knew i was bad at this... This will probably be the last time you will ever try...
@josegarcia303
4 жыл бұрын
I fail and fail ans i am afraid and keep being afraid or everything, or responsabilities, appointments, simole things they make me do make me fearful. My job in Air Conditioning gives me fear. The fear of traveling and driving daily, it brings fear to me. I wish i was brave and better but for a reason i am like this. I am polite and careful and loving but the world is different from me.
@MarnixPauwels
4 жыл бұрын
Yup, but the little voice is still just a thought. And the more you see that we live in the feeling of our thinking, the less worry and anxiety. It's like an evolving relaxation into life.
@mitch5222
3 жыл бұрын
@@MarnixPauwels I failed so many times that I don't trust myself. Plus having health issues. Lately i got huge fear of dying and I am really scared to move on in life. What to do?