I don't understand if you saw that the people in the restaurant were afraid of you because they didn't know how to speak to you , why didn't you just immediately start speaking in Japanese instead of letting them fumble around in english and hand you an English menu? Anyways probably for the best since if someone has such a negative attitude on the first date- they are not going to get better. Instead of having fun going to a new area in a new country he seems like one of those guys who just complains about everything and ends up miserable unless everything is perfect to his liking.

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

The thing about this is, even when we speak Japanese, they don't hear Japanese, they just see foreigners. Even after being like "yeah we speak japanese' they're still hanging back and staring and not treating us like Japanese people, thinking we need help reading the menu or need help ordering. I always speak Japanese. I've lived here for almost 15 years now, I don't walk into restaurants speaking English. They just assume English based on ~the face~.

@themountainwanderer

4 жыл бұрын

@@Ciaela I've read that many times now. That's really strange. Why does appearance trump language skills? Also makes it really difficult if you live there, I am sure.

@grellgo

4 жыл бұрын

@@themountainwanderer I am by no means an expert but my first thought is that it's not about the guests ability to speak or not speak Japanese but the hosts role in this interaction. Perhaps they feel it's more accommodating to a foreigner to present them with an English menu. As she mentioned in the video, this was a restaurant "off the beaten path", so likely the owners were not very accustomed to foreign patrons. Naturally there is some anxiety on how you can find a comfortable middle ground in relating to customs, and how to meet customs you know nothing about.

@Enigmatism415

4 жыл бұрын

@@themountainwanderer In Japan, there's a difference between 'oh, this foreigner can speak the language' and 'oh, this foreigner understands the culture'. They probably assumed based on phenotype alone that even if they can speak perfectly intelligible Japanese, there's just something about their very DNA that precludes them from fully internalising the culture to the extent that a native Japanese person would. If the tables were turned and this transpired in an 'off the beaten path' part of Canada, the cries of racism would be heard around the hemisphere. In Japan, however, this level of internalised globalisation just hasn't been reached; whilst Canada's PM brags about Canada lacking a 'core identity' or 'mainstream', Japan embraces such things.

@bud384

4 жыл бұрын

@@Ciaela what happened to you was bad but i think a white person is treated way better in Japan compared to a foreign Asian, maybe if we're not talking they won't give us a bad prejudice, but if they spot we can't speak fluent Japanese, we're treated like second class citizens, much worse than a white person..

Guy: "You care too much about what people think" Also Guy: *gets pissed when people think he's a foreigner*

@suineg1

4 жыл бұрын

Exactly my thoughts!

@loopyfrog

4 жыл бұрын

THIS! haha

@SantomPh

4 жыл бұрын

to be fair it is a common frustration among half-Japanese people in Japan....and also Americans overseas. The latter case despite actually being foreigners. and hi Lon ~mewww~ 🐱🐱

@phangirlable

4 жыл бұрын

Dodged a bullet right there with that guy..

@WritingSch

4 жыл бұрын

He’s still hypocritical and rude

OMG - Micaela, HE doesn't like the date, HE doesn't like the pudding place, HE was upset about being treated like a foreigner instead of laughing it off and having fun with it. Then he tells you you care too much about what others think and you decide he is correct, go home, immediately reflect hardcore and buy a self help book. It's good to be introspective, but it sounds like, you guys not having a good time was a lot to do with him and less to do with you. Sorry that date did not go well. Glad you've found someone new, hope it goes well.

@jessicafisher2985

4 жыл бұрын

100% agree with this comment!

@quelodequelo

4 жыл бұрын

In EU/Italy we don't date (I'm not really sure if today works, I'm 44yo). We try to arrange for a couple of evenings with friends, to test him/her in a safe environment, then we go out alone in a very well known public place to have fun, later if we kiss and we keep daily communicating, we are exclusive. This special wonderful date that you had, its something we do for a special occasion when in 3/4 months relationship

@grace4683

4 жыл бұрын

@antiami then he shouldn't complain all the time?

@JessicaVanderhoff

4 жыл бұрын

Exactly. Insulting her because she's being considerate and accommodating just makes this guy sound like an ungrateful jerk with a bad attitude. It would have been absolutely fine for him to to say "oh it's fine, I was just saying it has a weird vibe, but I do still want to try it and see how it is," but he just sounds like he has no manners/social skills. And I can understand feeling awkward or weird about the language thing-- nobody's perfect or socially stellar all the time. But if he got nasty about it and let it ruin his day, she probably dodged a bullet (and a lot of adult temper tantrums).

@13FallenAngela

3 жыл бұрын

@@quelodequelo Half my family is from Italy. Lives and works in Italy and never anywhere else. I think you are being too strict in your interpretations of "dating". In fact I think you are full of crap.

I'm so happy you found someone who treats you so lovingly and respectfully

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

Aw Taylor! Thank you. Hoping I make it over to Hong Kong eventually. I want you to show me all the good food there 😭♥️

@sarahjane7231

4 жыл бұрын

@@Ciaela but... the corona virus!!!

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

@@sarahjane7231 with like at least 200 people infected off a boat in Japan I'm sure Hong Kong has it better than we do at the moment

I'm sure it's different for him actually being half, but my Japanese boyfriend has a very non-Japanese face (according to other Japanese people) and when we go out together people treat us like that sometimes. He thinks it's hilarious and pretends not to know Japanese. Your guy being so sour about everything is definitely a reflection on him and not you. I'm so glad you found someone better than that.

@DreamOfFireFlies

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah my Japanese husband gets treated like a foreigner sometimes too. Sometimes Japanese people will struggle to try to speak English to him when he is with me without realizing he is Japanese.

@carldiva3922

4 жыл бұрын

This comment is so racist that you don't even realize it is

@carldiva3922

4 жыл бұрын

@@annieevie9607 seriously??

@jedjade4002

4 жыл бұрын

It's different if you've been bullied or picked on, or made to feel like an outsider in your own country your whole life, vs being full Japanese but just kinda not looking it. That guy for sure has hangups, and seemed like a bit of a douche otherwise, but I just want to say your comparison isn't really comparable in my opinion.

@Akkii50

4 жыл бұрын

@@jedjade4002 Oh, I definitely agree. I'm sorry I worded my comment so poorly. His reaction to being treated like an outsider is valid. No person should be treated like that, and Japan does have many issues surrounding that. I meant the sour attitude surrounding the whole day that Micaela described. I see now that putting that comment right after my own anecdote was not reflective of what I actually meant.

If a guy's irritated when on a first date, that's a good sign to get the hell outta there. Don't know why you went for desert afterwards. I'd have left him in the restaurant.

@vocalliner

4 жыл бұрын

Same

@adam71_YouTube

4 жыл бұрын

Lol

@matthewfurlani8647

4 жыл бұрын

Being irritated = bad person? Sounds like terrible advice

@KillerPiplup

4 жыл бұрын

Matthew Furlani getting irritated for something so stupid does make u look like an ass.

@matthewfurlani8647

4 жыл бұрын

You dont know how he actually responded. You guys are taking her word on everything. She admits she has some serious issue with dating and self respect and you side with her? He could be responding very naturally to being constantly treated like a foreigner in his own nation. Like how blacks are treated in america. She said she tried to bring him to a new place because he seemed upset. I honestly wouldnt want to be pandered to in that way either and many people i know feel the same way. Dont need to become someones servant because they arent happy. Thats not a healthy relationship. So thinking youre clever or something because it didnt work out and shes revealing one selected and biased story of her time dating doesnt mean hes the bad guy automatically. You werent there so maybe you should understand her flawed perspective is telling the story

Woo happy life update💖You look amazing, can't wait to see you soooooon

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

I can't wait to re-do my bad date with you. Haha. 🧡

@sharlainjapan

4 жыл бұрын

Micaela ミカエラ Hahaha I was thinking that while watching😂 Promise I won’t get mad at u if they give us an English menu😂

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

​@@sharlainjapan Please don't make me cry. 😂

you dodged a bullet. he sounds like a nightmare prince

@theoakhills

4 жыл бұрын

Narcissist.....comes to mind.

@lovely-shrubbery8578

4 жыл бұрын

@@theoakhills agreed

@akemikaitani6203

4 жыл бұрын

Narricist.

@KidApoc

4 жыл бұрын

Agreed,he’s a total(spoiled)flake.

It sounds like the guy was immature and had a bad attitude and perhaps you over-compensated a bit to try and accommodate him which is understandable in that situation. Dating is just like a job interview, you have to go through many candidates before you find the right one. In that sense, it's good to weed out the bad ones to focus on the quality ones even though it can get exhausting and dispiriting at times. Hang in there and you'll be fine. By the way, I like how your lipstick compliments your sweater. You look great!

@michaelmaddox2536

4 жыл бұрын

Yea, the guy was just a little b!t@$ tbh. It's good though, atleast he didn't string you along.

As a half Japanese person I definitely understand being treated differently depending on who you’re with in Japan, but i really don’t think he should have overreacted like that

I once dated a guy who got annoyed and pissed about everything. It really ruined my self esteem and I had to do therapy to fix myself. I’m really glad you dodged that guy. You should never FEEL bad about yourself because you did nothing wrong. I feel terribly that because of him you got a self help book when he is the narcissist

@Therizinosaurus

Жыл бұрын

Huh, mmkay

逆に、その人の性格を初めてのデートで知れて良かったと思いますよ！ これが付き合って何ヶ月経った後とかだと、しんどい...😅

I think that you having that bad experience with that guy was actually a blessing in disguise. You seem like a very thoughtful person, and he sounds kind of selfish to me. Sometimes we get such high hopes for someone or something, and it really takes some deep retrospect to see what isn't meant for us. I suppose having those bad dating experiences may be better than no dating experiences. I haven't gone on a date in, years, literally. I'm a hopeless romantic, an empath, but most importantly, an introvert. Dating was never difficult for me when I was younger, but now that the stakes are higher and I'm playing for all the marbles, I'm just afraid of finding something short of real Love. Anyways, I shall bore you no more, my "white as the Moon" friend. & thanks for letting me write a freakin manifesto 😬🤓

I had to meet for lunch with a guy, and he already ate!!! So he was just staring at me while i was having my luch...awkward

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

Oh my god. I'm actually laughing out loud. That is awful.

@yeevita

4 жыл бұрын

Too funny. Me, I would have enjoyed eating slower and ordering super slow food haha. I’m nice, but not that nice.

@TheCeska90

4 жыл бұрын

@@Ciaela and I had to talk the whole time. but the fun fact was that he had not a cell phone (it was around 7 years ago so it was very weird) and he kept calling me at my house! so I asked my dad to answer and tell him to stop bothering me XD (sorry I had to, he called me at least 4 times a day....ok maybe I found a stalker and I'm realizing it now. what a fun first year of college)

ミカエラさんの人に気をつかえるところ、人をいつも楽しませようとするところ、全て素敵な個性ですよ😭それを悪いことのように言った彼が許せません😭わたしは動画を通して、優しくて楽しませることが好きなミカエラさんを見ていつも楽しませてもらってますよ！そして、「自分のよくないところを治した」なんて言わないで！自分を見つめ直すことは大事だけど、ミカエラさんの素敵な性格などは変えなくてもいいと私は思います☺️久しぶりにKZreadあげてくれてありがとうございます❤️❤️

It's so sweet to catch up with you, I haven't checked in on your videos for too long and it's been really sad to see the struggles you've been through lately. You're such a lovely person and you should never apologise for trying too hard or thinking of others, they're admirable traits! I scrolled back to a super old video of yours from 10 years ago called 'my life in a nutshell' and I thought how what you said then seems so relevant to you now, hearing how you coped studying in Japan as the only English person in town and how you felt going home afterwards, it might help you collect your thoughts on where you are now in your life's journey. Most importantly though your new hair looks amazing! Hugs

Thank you, it takes a ton of courage to do what you do. That is to show your vulnerabilities to your community that has been built up for years of interaction. It may not be intended, but you have given hope to many of those who are suffering, myself included, that hope is possible. I felt I lost my identity, slowly picking up my self. I am glad that you have updated the community, keep on creating and exploring while sharing your experiences. We'll keep cheering you on.

I love dating stories! 😆 I can do relate to this! I had a similar issue. The guy made me cry. He should never have said you care about what people think too much after he said what he thought 😂 I deleted bumble and tinder and a few months later met my husband. You’re heading down the right path! 💕

動画　待ってました。 シャーラやレイチェルから信頼されるミカエラの人間性に、我々視聴者も惹かれます。 新しい恋人が、ミカエラにとって最愛の人になることを願っています。 久しぶりの“ロン”登場が嬉しい😃。

Good to see a new upload, really enjoy the story telling. No need to apologize for your audience for taking a break either. Looking forward to see more. :)

I was so happy when I got the e-mail notification for a new video. I just got out of a relationship so this video hits close to home. It's really great that you seem like you're doing better now. Looking forward to more videos!

Ahh, the dating scene. Good to know it stinks no matter what country you're in. Had one not too long ago where things seemed to be going well until she mentioned her boyfriend. When I clarified that I thought we were on a date she responded with, "Oh yeah. I mean, I'm with him, but I've been thinking about dumping him and just wanted to see what my options were first." Or something to that effect (can't remember her exact wording).

I’m glad you found a new person that makes you feel happy 😊 the story with the half japanese guy was sooo crazy! What a wimp! You dodged a bullet!

I want more tiny updates! You’re so personable, it’s like talking to an old friend. Learning about attachment styles helped me too ♥️

I’m glad to see your video! Dating is such a hard time. Sorry you had a bad experience with that guy, but I’m glad you found another one that seems to sounds amazing. I hope that you two stay learn more about each other! Thank you for sharing your experience!

Nothing wrong with you trying to make someone happy by going somewhere else. He should try out compromise as well. The dude from the date sounds like a giant red flag. Glad you found someone secure.

健康的に見えるので心身共に良い状態だと思った。 来日した頃から見てるけど、今が一番きれいだよ。 人生を楽しんで！

@user-rx8je3oo2t

4 жыл бұрын

thinkeg わかる

It's amazing I've been subscribed to you for over 10 years, and you haven't changed at all! I love your originality and how you always do it you way.

Hello Micaela, it's nice to see you. ☺ I'm glad there was happy news at the end. All we can do in life is try our best!

If someone gets irritated on the first few dates it's a gigantic red flag. They probably have anger issues or complain when any little inconvenience happens. He sounds like an ass. You did everything you could and he clearly didn't appreciate your effort. There's a difference between being honest and inconsiderate

@swift1234able

4 жыл бұрын

Agreed!!

On the last Rachel and Jun's last vlog they spoke about how important you are to them! It sounds like you have found a new and gentle, easier start and that is so important because looking back on sweet times is a great way to remain connected in case health or family obligations change your view of each other. It should be easy but that doesn't mean it won't be scary! Those words "We need to talk" can be very difficult but may bring new understanding. Good luck and have a wonderful spring!

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

Rachel and Jun are really building a community for themselves here, it's great to see them so happy! :) Thank you for the positive vibes 🧡

You're a very grounded and headstrong person. I admire your resolve and think you won't have any unforseen troubles. Keep on keepin' on! Great to hear from you.

Aww! Well good for you Micaela (re the new guy) it sounds like you’re in a good space relationship wise now. Hope the vibe ‘n feelings you’ve got right now can keep that way i.e find a way to make it feel fresh & lovely like it does now. Keeping my fingers crossed for you that this goes the distance. 👍🏻💛

Can I say something? I think you apologise a lot. I tell you this because I do it too but there’s nothing to apologise for. You tried to show this guy around and help him have a good time. He was being ungrateful and negative and that sucks but it’s not your fault! I wish you all the best and that you someday find someone kind and fun and amazing ❣️

@Enigmatism415

4 жыл бұрын

Canada and Japan are the two most apologetic countries on planet earth.

@Aurelia2147

4 жыл бұрын

antiami But isn’t that what she offered? She asked him, if he wanted to be shown around. According to the video she offered him to be his guide. Then he should have said so from the beginning instead of acting passive aggressively. Sometimes it’s better to keep your thoughts to yourself or to be really honest about it. A mature answer could’ve been: “I’m sorry, this is not what I expected/this makes me feel uncomfortable, could we leave/could we go back home?” And don’t come with: maybe he was just trying to be nice. If you’re not interested on going out with someone you just don’t go out with someone. Period. There’s nothing kind about doing otherwise. It’s just self-flattery. But sure, if you know him personally maybe it would be best he presents his side. I don’t think she wanted to involve him because it was important to her to talk about her experience in dating and not about bashing the guy. I mainly wrote my comment because she may be too sensitive to see that she doesn’t need to apologise for everything, especially not for someone else’s negativity

@Aurelia2147

4 жыл бұрын

antiami but maybe then he should’ve said so. No reason to be complaining. I mean if he’s the same age as her that’s the mature thing to do, don’t you think? I think it’s ungrateful to complain, then when she suggests to go to another place and to there then complain again just because one is overwhelmed. I don’t think that is fair and justifiable. I’m sure she was overwhelmed by his reaction as well, still she tried to better the situation

@TimesHero

4 жыл бұрын

Sorry.

@Aurelia2147

4 жыл бұрын

@antiami He was complaining about the place they went to, which she concluded as: he doesn't like the restaurant and suggested to go somewhere else. First of all, it's in my opinion rude to complain about something when you know the other person put thought into going there and secondly it's overall really rude to complain when you don't even know the other person that well. It's about the way you communicate. If you tell a person in a normal manner that you feel uncomfortable being at a restaurant that's alright and you either move on to another place or stay (but why would you do that) plus it's weird that he felt so offeneded being treated as a foreigner because as she says in the video it will mean that he will be seen as a foreigner with her and it will make him feel uncomfortable ergo why hang out with her in the future? Then again, yes it is her narrative of course. We don't know the full story, since this is her channel. We don't know whether sho asked him to be his guide or if she simply offered to drive him out. In my opinion any date can pan out in so many different ways. There are no strict rules like staying in one place or going to a fancy restaurant but for others it might be. However, the complaining part makes me angry because it comes off as ungrateful. She put lots of thought into driving him there and giving him a perfect experience and still he complained at both places. What would you do, if someone told you " this place is weird, I don't like it"? For me that has the meaning of. 'Please let us go somewhere else, I don't want to stay here' or 'how do you think this place is nice'? Plus telling her that she cares too much about what other people think is totally overstepping her boundaries. Yes, it may be true (as she states in the video) but there's no reason of telling her that especially not in that context. It seems really entitled of him. Maybe he needs to learn to be a bit more sensible. It's one think to complain when you've known each other for years but another when this is your first date and your date asked you out, therefore planned the whole date. I wouldn't want to meet a guy after the first date again, if he would act the same way.

その男がおかしいやろ笑 ミカエラは謝る必要はない！

Great to see you again! Really hope you’re successful with the date life. Want you back making videos, but take all the time you need.

I haven't watched the whole video yet, but I just want to say that the reason for your hiatus makes total sense and I'm glad you're being careful! It makes me worry when I see KZreadrs discuss their feelings about personal events in real time. Stay safe.

I'm glad you've found someone that you're comfortable with. Among the couples I've known long-term (some for over 40 years) the most common trait is that each of these people gave their relationship the priority it deserved as they dealt with life's problems and complications. I hate using the word "teamwork", but that's how it felt for Terry and me, and is the best word to describe our friend's long-term relationships. Communication and trust are both so important.

I once went on a date with a guy, and 10 minutes in he said that I laugh too much, and that I have an awful laugh. Then he asked me if I wanted to skip dinner and go to his place. Suffice to say that’s the shortest date I’ve ever been on. Hang in there, dating is tough! I feel your pain!

@kotare86

4 жыл бұрын

One guy on a date told me he would fire me if he were my boss! And he was keen to go on another date!!

@goodgirl140

4 жыл бұрын

kotare86 What was the context? How does that even come up? What a jerk.

@kotare86

4 жыл бұрын

@@goodgirl140 I told him I took a nap in the office toilet at work once because I was so sleepy. Then he said he would have fired me for that! (He was a business/charity owner).

Wow, you’ve been in Japan for 15 years?! That’s amazing. It’s year number 8 for me (China/Japan) and that’s already felt like a long time. You spent half your life over here already.

Been following you since the beginning of the youtoobz. Even though I have never met you it's been great getting to know you. I hope this year will be filled with love and joy. Maybe one day our paths will cross! Life is very crazy !

woohoo she's back in the game! 4 months the wait was worth it!!

Kit is just so mellow and chill, I love him!! 😭 I'm sorry you had such a horrible experience, but honestly, I'm way more on your side, than his. I can understand that kind of experience suddenly making you feel uncomfortable, but you shouldn't allow that to ruin your whole day, not to mention be rude to the person trying to have a good day WITH YOU, and then to top it all off, just being an out and out JERK to that person? Nope. I want to punt him off a balcony. I hope the new guy in your life, proves to be deserving of your time, and you. I care about you, and want to see you happy, cause you deserve it. Most of my "romantic arena" horror stories, have nothing to do with people I have dated, or wanted to date. They come from people who wanted to date ME, but I did not have that kind of interest in THEM. However, I was just recently NEARLY catfished! I'm queer, and use a dating/social media app, called HER, which is specifically targeted for queer people who are at least primarily attracted to women. I clicked well with a girl on there, we'll call her "T", and after a few messages, we exchanged numbers, to talk about how and when to meet up. Well, she got really scary, really fast. She wanted us to "be in a relationship", after exchanging all of maybe 5 messages, back and forth. Started calling me "baby", almost right away, and told me to send her a pic of me. Didn't ask, TOLD. I was suspicious, so I told her I was at work, and that we couldn't take photos while we were in the lab(I'm a marine biologist), which seemed to work smoothly. I asked her if she'd send me one, and it was one that was on her profile. She then started begging me to try and snap a photo, when no one would be watching. I continually told her I wouldn't risk my job, and then she started asking to video chat, which I explained I couldn't do for the same reasons. I quickly realized this girl either wasn't who she was presenting herself to be, or that she was potentially psychotic. So I told her I had to get back to work, but we could video chat as soon as I got home from work, and that I'd message her when I was leaving the lab. She bought it, and once she'd stopped messaging, I had blocked her on everything(including blocking her number), and reported her account. I was informed that this person had about 20 fake profiles, JUST ON THAT APP, and that they took all of them down. I've been wary, ever since...

Thanks for sharing. I think a lot of people needed to hear this including myself. Its hard if everything is unstable and you want some sort of security. I am rooting for you.

Miss you girl!!!!! Love yourself and have fun. You do look so much happier and it makes me happy!

I had the same realisation at the start of my current relationship, that relationships don't have to be hard! It's amazing how that just clicks when you both meet the right person at the right time in your lives. Also, this is unrelated but your jumper is super cute 😅

Last year I made some weird dating experiences too and at the end I found a person I’m seeing now for a while. Dating people on Tinder etc can be really difficult imo. Tried Tinder too, but also not very long. I’m glad you found someone. 💕 And this guy you dated sounds really moody. You don’t want a relationship with a moody person who always complains ... 🙄 I had several of those and they always made me feel down. And it took me a while to realize that those people are not good for me.

GREAT TO SEE YOU BACK AND WELL. THANK YOU FOR THE VIDEO.

From what I hear in this video, I AM a lot like you and get told I'm "so sensitive all the time" and that I should just "not care as much". Dating and relationships SHOULD NOT be that emotionally draining, they just shouldn't. Thanks for making this video, Micaela. All the best luck to you. ❤️

You're not too sensitive - what an ungrateful grump! Can we just say hurrah for secure men! We don't need a baby to look after. I'm so pleased you have someone so great! Eee Kit is so huggable, I wanna hug!

I don't understand why people get angry when Japanese people assume you don't speak Japanese. Because it is true most of the time and they make an effort to help you even when they themselves cannot speak English well.

Hey Micaela welcoe back to YouTUbe no need to apoligize for the hiatus. Sorry to hear about the breakup and stuff at least you have now gained experience which will help ya in the future when the time comes for it remember take your time. :)

Sorry to hear about the crappy date. Looking forward to new travel videos!

love your sweater!

@Ciaela

4 жыл бұрын

Thanks!! I love the one in your icon too!

I live in Japan too. In Kansai. My partner is Japanese and because we are always together he get mistaken a foreigner too, which is funny cause he’s a dark skinned, very Japanese looking guy. He will always laugh it off and be like “nah I’m Japanese” Both of us start talking in Japanese and a lot of people will always comment on us being a couple. My Japanese is still terrible and his English is also terrible so people give him more shit than me for it, telling him to work harder and stuff. Then a lot of people say shit like “えええー彼女は外人さん！めっちゃ羨ましい” Which is also shit. People always have their shitty things they want to say about mixed race relationships or whatever but you know you’ve found a good one when he doesn’t let it bother him. He treats me as an individual and not as a gaijin which is great. I hope things with your new guy go well. My partner and I are getting married next month so I’ll try and send a little bit of luck and love your way.

Might check out the book! Have heard it recommended before but maybe this is the final push :) Good to see you doing better Micaela!

What the what!!! Ahem, ok...glad THAT DATE “didn’t” work out asap instead of down the road whew!!! ...moving on! So happy you found someone worth getting to know better!!! Sending cool, happy, positive vibes your way 😊

"You care too much about what other people think" should be directed more at the guy, am I right? Pretty prideful to have one bad experience being treated as a non Japanese speaking tourist and then.... BOOM! You did your best through a shitty situation though so props to you. I'm glad you've found a good guy. My husband and I jokingly feel like it's worth always trying in our marriage just because we realise how horrible dating actually would be now. :P

@crsh2007

4 жыл бұрын

She should have came back at him with "You complain too much! Would you just CHILL??" What was so wrong with her trying to accommodate him?

Oh Micaela, spend time on you and line up what you want to do. Go to those places, do those things, be who you want to be. Don't worry about others. I don't have a dating story for here but I was just divorced and I'm going to take this time to close out my old life and open up my new one in a new State with new people and places to see. And from one ex-pat to another, I could not see leaving the US pretty much no matter how bad it got here. Just think of why you wanted to move and why you stay. I would not want to return to the UK and be a foreigner there too...

Wish you the best girl, always a pleasure to watch your vids 💕 Take care.

Ye omg, that was so hurtful! I feel like when we try our best for someone else and are excited it's also easier to take bad comments to heart. I'm glad that you found how you want to feel in a relationship and I wish you all the happiness. Til next time :)

久しぶりの投稿うれしいです😊優しい彼が出来て良かったね😃応援してます🙂

あの本…！私も英語の勉強もかねて最近買ったので、動画に出てきてビックリしました！ まだ読んでないですけど、ミカエラさんの紹介で楽しみになりました🥺

I just realized I think you were one of the first people I subbed too. I don't know how long it's been but at least 10 years I think? Or very close to it. I just started checking out your videos again and yea, I totally get where you're coming from. Thanks for being chill and honest

yaaaaaay!!! I am soooooooo happy for you Mica !!!! I hope it goes well for u!! u deserve the best!

そういうトラブルがあると相手の人間性が出るから 内面を知れるいい機会と思うしかないですよ。

He was testing you to see how much control he can have over you. So sorry.

Really glad to have you back Micaela!!!! ✨✨✨

Well, relationship should be something that shelter you. Good to know you seem to have finally found it! I look forward to your vlogs from you, they are so relatable when I’m a Japanese who’s planning to move to Canada XD

Girl as soon as I heard you talk about the way this guy acted and making up "excuses" as to why he was like that... no. The fact that the end of the date ended with you crying means this guy is TOXIC and thank the lord you didn't go on a 2nd date. My ex used to be like that, super full of himself, high strung, I would constantly try to make him happy about going to places and he wouldn't even TRY to have a good time. And it made me feel worthless. If it makes you feel better about where you're at in life, I too have started to move on from my 6 YEAR LONG TERM relationship with that absolute ASS and to hear you talk about this shitty ass motherfucker the same way I used to talk about my boyfriend ("he's not happy so it means everythings my/their fault) PHEW girl. Don't let these nobodies control your emotions. As soon as you see a man act like a child or acting dodgy, end the date there and leave. You don't have any obligation to make naturally unhappy people happy with you. For the first time in a long time Im happier than I have been in awhile and that's because I'm away from my shitty toxic relationship. Keep enjoying doing you, and the right person will fall in your lap. Believe me. It'll happen to me to someday. Love you girl.

You're so right, Tinder and dating apps suck ! I met a girl who seemed to be so jaded that I did not even understand why she kept dating. Most of the time, I meet girls with no conversation, struggling with their past or insecurities and sometimes, it can get really scary. I'm too normal for that kind of stuff, and I think you are too Micaela ! Just wait for the right guy to show up. You're a wonderful woman, you will find the right person, don't worry !

Hokkaido, in general, is a bucket list destination, for me. Very glad that your current relationship is healthier than those in the past. Best of luck!

You did just fine. That guy was bent on having a bad time. You are a fantastic girl and I wish you the absolute best !!! You can do it! We are cheering you on!

"You care too much what people think....." Me: You're right! (Gets in car and drives off without Mr. Killjoy)

そんなことが…辛いです😰 ミカエラさんは何も悪く無い！

Hey Micaela! As an internet stranger but not really since I've followed ya for your awesome content for years! Thanks for sharing your experiences, it's very courageous! I'm not in the dating game because it's hard 😂 what you shared seems like you're a very considerate person. I'm exactly the same and hope to meet someone who gets the "vibe." If that makes sense! I'm always putting others first because I want them to be happy! I'm not on dating apps because I'd love for it to be organic. I still want to believe in coincidences! In the future if you ever find yourself in LA would be rad! Thanks again and look forward to more vids! - Joe D

You are such a rad gal, like the kind of person I'd love to be great friends with. Dating can be such a nightmare! I feel like I really lucked out meeting my husband at my old workplace. It's always awesome to have a mindset shift after reading a really good book ❤️ Have a great day! Looking forward to your next video!

None of his qualms are your fault. He's just a grump

Is it even a life update chat if we don't have Lon barging in at some point? 🤣 Super excited to see you posting again, can't wait for the travel videos to emerge~ 😊

Hey glad your back. What a weirdo that guy was. I went to Fukuoka last month. What a great place. I loved Huis ten Bosch, nanzoin temple, tenjin area, beppu hells and Yanagawa. I will be going there to explore more often. Please more exploring videos. I go to Japan constantly and love checking new stuff out. Thanks from Hawaii.

Hi Miceala...Sorry yo had such a difficult time adjusting but I think you will soon realize that life is full of ups and downs. I don't think one can really begin to experience life without suffering true pain. The pain usually wakes you to appreciate what you truly have. You have one kind heart! So, please be kind to yourself as you are to all those around you!...BTW I hope you stay beyond 2021 because I was gonna ask you lots of questions about Fukuoka. Hokkaido is the bomb!! You're gonna love it up there!

とにかく良い彼氏が出来て良かったね🎉🎉🎉彼氏と楽しい時間をいっぱい過ごしてね🥰

That experience sounded awful, but it’s great to hear that you got through it and are safe on the other side now. You’re probably very right about the culture gap in rural Kyushu vs. Tokyo. The same things still apply here too though, like how everyone assumes that you won’t be able to understand them unless they speak English. I do wish that one day it will improve, but living in Japan as an obviously foreign-looking person does require you to commit to accepting it for the time being. Regarding PR, you might want to consider applying anyway because of the length of the process. It doesn’t mean you will stay here forever, but getting it can help with taking away some stress from your life. Needing to worry about one day having to leave the place you’ve made home is too heavy. It helped a lot for me in that respect.

your skin is glowing

That guy sounds like a twaffle, don't feel bad. We know you're cooler than him anyway. I'm glad there is someone nice. xD Also, I'd hire you any day to be my tour guide. The foods, the beaches, the secret mountain photo spots, take me to them all!

容姿の壁＞言語の壁。One of the russian youtubers was asked '' Do you speak english''? And she said ''NO'' but I speak Japanese ！ What the answer she got ’’'ふざけるな’’’🌸🇨🇦🍁

You got this! I believe in you and that you can make your dreams reality for 2020!

I hope that guy can find peace one day based on how he projects himself with higher energy (when he confronted you like that OOOF T.T scaryyyyy) I really liked this story, thanks for sharing Micaela! I'm super used to japanese culture and never would have thought that other side of the coin with people new to it xD

この人には幸せになって欲しいなぁと思う。それが日本でなくてもいいから…

ミカエラさん偉い💕人生なんでも経験！！！

Thank you for the life update! I love your videos and I was wondering where you were 😆 so sorry your date went that way :( I’m glad that guy showed you his red flags right off the bat rather that you being with him before he showed his true colors though!

Finally a new video ❤ Also, that guy should have appreciated the effort u put in to make the day the enjoyable and show him around the city. He just took it for granted and ruined the day. You should not blame yourself for that. You tried your best. I wouldn't take it for granted if I had just moved to a new city and someone suggested to show me around.

Sounds like you met a cute person with a really bad personality! I guess we just start projecting, get our hopes up, and get dissapointed when a date unfolds horribly like that. Good to hear this other person seems nice. In any case, I think you should work on feeling happy with yourself when you are single, and at the same time keep your heart, and arms wide open for a potential good relationship provided one feels ready for that. Also know that your story happens all the time, to countless people every day :D You're not alone ^^

in time everything will fall into place…….. i'm still waiting for that moment as well tough :( but someone will come along that will just be the right person it's only easy for people who only think about themselfs, so it's very hard for someone like you who cares for the other person to the point of forgetting yourself.

Hope the general upswing continues, and bless the little blue alien cat, I still love Lon.

I wish I could give you the biggest hug in the world. Like others said, none of that date was your fault. i'm sad that you concluded that you have to work on yourself (yes that's good in general) because it was *his* problem. You're in my thoughts!

昔より綺麗になった気がする

お帰りなさい。 You have resolved completely. I"m looking forward to your videos introducing lifestyle in Fukuoka, Kyusyu. Please explore Japan and make many friends!

Weird that youtube recommend your life-update video to my homepage every time you made a new one, probably because I watched too many of your videos haha. I was also once a foreigner in Japan for 3 years and kinda feel your feelings. Eventually I went back to my country, but I still wish you all the best in Japan

After seeing your tweet today, I'm back to this video. The news was very sad for me, but I think you and your partner support each other, so both you are strong. I'm glad that you've found such partner. I'm always rooting for you, Micaela!