"You can't look for healing in the same place you got hurt." This needs to be in your next book.

"If you have to tell someone to care about you, they don't." 🙌🙌

@orubek355

3 жыл бұрын

👌

“Never be embarrassed that you’re the one capable of love,” Shallon 2021

“I was single for a year, I just didn’t know it’ 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼😂

@btm4079

3 жыл бұрын

I need a shirt with that phrase

@shirin9452

3 жыл бұрын

😭😭

@sandersonspr

3 жыл бұрын

@@btm4079 yes!

@thisissarah815

3 жыл бұрын

Damn that’s some hard facts! 🔥 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

@conniecanas1422

3 жыл бұрын

Believe me she knew it

I feel like Khloe will forever chase the start of her relationship with Lamar because he chose to be with her when she was still the "ugly sister", he wanted her no for popularity or get close to her sister but because he fell for her and even if a guy does it now, she'll feel like it was because of the surgery she got done

@LOLforLIFE123

3 жыл бұрын

Wow!!!!

@islabee94

3 жыл бұрын

Yes!!! He liked the real her, there's no coming back from that and also no recreating it either.

@agathachris9722

3 жыл бұрын

Hmmm

@fsal4682

3 жыл бұрын

This is deep

@arianaraquel1958

3 жыл бұрын

She likes him even when Lamar said she had a stinky vagina in court! 🙈

You’re the wise sister a lot of women need in their life. How people treat you says everything you need to know about them and nothing about you. Only take accountability for yourself!

@recommendforyou7494

3 жыл бұрын

I like to think of her as my older sister

@bluecollarlit

3 жыл бұрын

Kala, Yes I have to often remind myself of the quote by Maya Angelou, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." I've had a habit of building people up in my mind, to be better than they are (optimist). It doesn't serve me - Maya A is right.

"Summer is slow for celebrities" sooo perfect time for a video on the worst celebrities you've interviewed? 👀 👀

I think closure can be overrated. They're not going to tell the truth about why they left. And if they do give you closure they do it for themselves..to absolve themselves of guilt. Not because they really care about you.

Closure doesn’t come from anyone but ourselves. I had to forgive someone who wasn’t even sorry and it was for MY peace of mind.

@lynninfinite

3 жыл бұрын

Yessss.

"If someone is into you they're going to know what to do/how to fix it. You don't have to tell them." Is really understated advice. Get it girl!

shallon this is probably my favourite video from you. i really needed this right now. this has fully changed my mindset this is why i love you

Thank you. I've been saying this to my psychotherapist for months. She was not listening to me and insisted that.. she keep telling me to seek an explanation from my ex. Now you validate my felings and my intuition: I don't need him to heal the damage he did to me

@beewest5704

3 жыл бұрын

And in most cases if he was capable of validating your feelings & healing you wounds you would still be together.

Sometimes, once you realize you don’t need closure, that’s the closing moment. When you still feel confused and want answers, you won’t feel ready to move on. Once you get to the point of not wanting to know why they did X, Y, and Z, you’ll get better :)

@sammierose1150

3 жыл бұрын

For me, closure was knowing what I personally did [wrong] in the relationship/situationship that led to its demise so I don’t make those mistakes again the next time around 💁🏽‍♀️

“Never be embarrassed that you were the one capable of love ❤️.” I love this! Often times we feel like fools for opening up and trusting, but you’re right we should never feel bad about being open to love, they should be embarrassed about being grifters! Pretending to be mature, thoughtful, emotionally intelligent men when they’re really not!

@mepulley7913

3 жыл бұрын

Hey Truth Teller Thank You :). I needed to hear this

I'm so with you on the skiing thing! I went to a dry slope snowboarding lesson once, got down that mountain and went straight to the cafe for a hot chocolate. The instructor was like "where are you going?". I just shouted "not for me"

@shallonlester

3 жыл бұрын

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I’m the same way! I’ll see you at the cafe meet me by the fondue 🫕 Don’t need to throw myself down a mountain c

@Lucy116

3 жыл бұрын

@@shallonlester it's all about the Après-ski 😂😂

“If you have to tell someone to care about you, they don’t.” Watching this video a 2nd time and the quotes are endless and so on point!💕🤗

Your last couple of videos are your BEST videos. You've been good from the start, but the way you present things gets even more structured, relatable, unbiased, useful. Such a gem. I don't know what would I be doing if I hadn't found you two years ago. Thank you for being you. I am currently going through my worst friendship breakup ever, with people I cherished more than anyone, but I know I was a great friend and not finding things to blame myself for, somehow makes it even worse. You're a Godsent.

@shallonlester

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with a friend breakup. It’s so much worse than a love breakup-we’re supposed to lose guys, not our girls. But we are also supposed to find our tribe and people who support us, and these are not those people, you deserve to free yourself from that

So, two months ago I got ghosted by a guy. Not truly blindsided but it definitely hurt. Fast forward a month later and we had a phone call conversation in which 1) he explained why he ghosted 2) apologized for it. Everything he said was exactly what I *thought* I wanted to hear. And yet... as soon as we hung up, I felt empty. I realized at that moment that closure truly comes from within because instead of gaining more clarity I got left with more questions. Questions that I doubt he could ever answer because they weren't about him at all. They were about me and the real root of my insecurities. Moral of the story: Careful what you wish for. And always follow Shallon's advice.

Shallon I was literally driving home the other day and thinking about the breakup I’m recovering from and I said to myself “just like shallon’s video said, ‘I never lose, I win or I learn.’” Ahh I feel so smart and guided by your wisdom 🥺 thank you for your content

@kirastemmet2282

3 жыл бұрын

Love that!

My champion story is that I stopped dating losers and found an actual great man.

@agathachris9722

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly. Sometimes the problem is us.

Shallon you absolutely went off in this video right here. I honestly did not expect for you to speak straight to my fucking heart but you did & honestly this one video has helped me SO fucking much like my adoptive mom was an abusive crazy ass narcissist & like even though she’s caused me 100x more trauma than my own parents deaths did, for some reason I was still sitting here debating the possibility of talking to her “for closure” but you’re so right, I cannot get healing where I was hurt, & if I really wanted closure, I wouldn’t necessarily want a conversation, a back & forth, what I really want is her love & attention & I know better than anybody how futile that search is. This shit literally took such a weight off my shoulders, I hope you see this shallon I can’t believe how much this has helped in 30/40 minutes

csn you do a video about kim and her profesionalism and how she (lets be honest) is successful in everything she does (kkw is very successful, so is skims, she even had people buy a book full of her selfies😭) and also now she is getting people out of jail like wow she is the most professional out of her family and most people who met her say she is super nice even tho she is sooo famous

@cukimiso

3 жыл бұрын

@@daphnereloaded3480 true but kims brand is more loved- most makeup artists have kkw in their kit while kylies brand is only loved by her fans and also skims is going to dress the american olympic team kim has a better reputation than kylie- many people have negative experiences with kylie compared to kim

@cukimiso

3 жыл бұрын

@@daphnereloaded3480 kylie is shown more love online but kim is better irl

"You can't look for healing in the same place you got hurt" Damn it Shallon, your wise words get me EVERY SINGLE TIME!!! Oof...

I missed you!!! Having no closure sucks especially when you don’t see any signs…this guy I was dating for a year blocked my number and deleted his messenger supposedly but acted like everything was fine before then I only found out he blocked me when I used a coworkers phone to call me and he answered and asked him why …all he had to say was I don’t want to talk about this right now 😅

My grandma advised me to write a letter and burn it when I was upset.....it helped so much.

Can you do a video on Jamie Lynn Spears and maybe something about taking accountability without being defensive/angry?

@salamander8301

3 жыл бұрын

No she won't, she think Britney's conservatorship us a good thing

This video is everything. Thanks Shallon 😉 it’s the addiction to drama, struggle and failure we all need to get over. Can we get a wrap up of KUWTK videos where you discuss how each family member has evolved and key take aways from the 14 years?

@shallonlester

3 жыл бұрын

I like this idea a lot

@Katyloveheart

3 жыл бұрын

That would be so great

Omg girl where have you been?? I’ve been missing you and your wisdom lol

We love a 40 minute Shallon video 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

Ok this pink on you is fabulous and the hair is amazing. I feel like ur my online therapist and im already doing normal therapy 3 times a week.

ah Shallon we missed you!

Shallon, do you realize how many people missed you including me during literally the one single week you werent here? Welcome back♥️ P.s. The audio quality is not as good as your other videos. There might be some technical issues. Thought you'd like to know that .

@bluecollarlit

3 жыл бұрын

Humyrah Fatima, Yes please! Have that Shallon Audio fixed so it is the same level on every video - nice and loud so we can hear it. (I work full time and do a writing project in my free time so I kind of have 2 jobs. I can't always make time to sit down and look at the video and just listen. Often I'm doing tasks around my home while listening to Shallon, I want to be able to hear.) Get that sound level up. If anyone thinks it's loud, they can easily adjust the volume down

Is this what it feels like to go to therapy?? 😭 love u shallon

Can we please find out who stood up our Goddess Shallon. Nobody should waste our beautiful Goddess’ time. Shallon’s health and beautiful mind (btw she looks exquisite from self care/banging body) needs to be preserved at all costs. Thank you for coming to my mid day mimosa Ted Talk.

@agathachris9722

3 жыл бұрын

I really like Shallon. But she has some issues and sometime I see why she might habe trouble with men.

@angelkiss6692

3 жыл бұрын

@@agathachris9722 Intellectual women learn, through self awareness and introspection, conditional trust is warranted in many relationships. Objectively, Shallon has been very transparent with her experiences. Holistically, women have difficulty with men. If you’re on a dating app or organically meeting people, the dating landscape feel like your are filtering trash near Staten Island in the hopes of meeting a descent human being. Cowards are greatly enabled on dating apps. I refuse to have default judgement that Shallon has trouble with men. In this particular situation (while using logical reasoning), this coward presented himself as a descent human being, approached our Goddess requesting the luxury of time to get to know her, and like the inadequate person he is.... stood her up. Multidimensional women are insatiable and relentless. We learn through experience. The conclusion to this situation, this Coward wasted Shallon’s time. Thank you for coming to my midnight Ted Talk.

I think I'm going to be rewatching this video periodically for the rest of my life. Awesome advice and perspective.

“You can’t find healing in the same place you got hurt”….Uhhhh that one hit hard!

It took me a few years to learn this in order to get over my heart locker. This is probably one of your best videos.

I'm only part-way through the video and I'm already living for the wisdom. You're a true gem dear 💎

She might not ever be fully broken up. Sadly, she seems almost broken and wrongly felt that she had to change for Tristan. She used to be so funny and sarcastic, she is absolutely loyal to her man (taking care of Lamar). And - she doesn't even need anyone.

I missed you so much darling! Hope you had a great vacation!

My closure is I take it as a lesson and find someone better, and be happy 🤩

Shallon, you and your videos have helped me SO much. I find myself going back and rewatching them because your advice and the way you speak touches me deeper every time. (And also because you're so damn witty and well spoken!) Thank you for sharing you and your talent. 😉👍

SHE'S BACK

You come just the right time Shallon. I needed this so bad right now. I love you beyond words, my sister ❤️❤️❤️❤️

I feel like those texts, the 'you'll regret this!' texts, actually kill any chance that they might've regretted cuz they just end up thinking, well she's crazy I dodged a bullet. Dignity over everything.

Honestly I think Lamar wasn't as bad as Tristan

I am half of the video, and I think is already one of my favourite ones on KZread ❤️

Thanks Shallon. I was discarded nearly 3 months ago after a 4 year relationship. This was helpful to hear.

Sometimes the only closure you need is closing your mouth and moving on

One quote that I love about closure "The disrespect is the only closure you need" 💀💀

Shallon! Girl! You ain’t said nothing, but a WORD!!! “You can’t look for healing ❤️‍🩹 in the same place you were hurt.” If they were capable of giving us a thoughtful explanation, they wouldn’t have hurt us so badly in the first place. So true! I’m dealing with this now.

Just what I needed to watch while I’m waiting in line for the Snow White ride 😘😘😘😘

Your last couple of videos have been some of your best work so far Shallon! Along with the questions you answered for me, you've been getting me through a terrible breakup, and I know I'm better for it! Keep inspiring!!!

Shallon I missed your videos, you got to stop leaving like that lol Glad your back :)

Omg i missed you!!! I was having withdrawals from no videos 😅

Love that you’re promoting second hand designer consignment! Best way to be a fashionista IMHO 💕

Shallon, bestie... imma be real with you... I am happy you are getting a well deserved break of vacation and still getting that coin. But girl. I am lost without you. 🥺 stop leaving me, I am lonely and stupider without you.

U gotta do one on Elizabeth Taylor and Marilyn Monroe..plssss

Who else is watch this and still doesn’t know when Shallon almost got cancelled. That is almost unfathomable.

@sandrar6670

3 жыл бұрын

If she showed her subscriber count again, it would feel like normal again, pre-cancellation.

You just dont know how many times you have helped us in our emotions and all..thanks shallon..keep safe...

Thank you SO much for the mindblow. I have been in love (more addicted than in love I guess) by a random dude i've dated 10 years ago, got a strange absession about him. Your sentence "I have stopped looking for that healing in the same place I got hurt" hit me like a fucking train. All these years I have tried to get closure from this, to have a strange confirmation that I have counted for him, that our mini story meant something, and tonight I have finally decided to let go, so thank you so much for that 🙏🏻

Shallon girl we missed you

Thank you, Shallon! I'm in an emotional limbo presently as a result of a separation.

The pink shirt looks so good on you ❤ it makes your skin glow!

WE MISSED YOU!!!!!! Hope you had an incredible vacation! You look AMAZING!!

11:07 I needed to hear this so bad, gasp!!!

This is such a great video Shallon, it came at such a. Good time

Fantastic video. I personally would not ever contact anyone. Silence speaks louder than words. I did that and that person felt it. Moving on and them expecting my attention was more hurtful than any words I could have said. Btw: no Brittany video?

“never be embarassed that you were the one capable of love”!!!!! ❤️

My jaw dropped at 31:30…. Holy shit that’s SO spot on! The way worded that was supreme. Yep, it’s wanting one more crack at the apple.

Oh shit Shallon you just called me out. I'm struggling with my on/off partner with his crack addiciton. WHAT AL I DOING. Girl, you just spoke to my soul. Thank you.

Hi,Shallon...glad u r back..missed ur videos..Please do an analysis on Jamie Lynn spears video or Britney Spears' audio.. Thank you

Shallon would love to see you do a series on 48 laws of power!

@shallonlester

3 жыл бұрын

I just started reading it!

i needed this so much omg, 3 years ago my best friend who i loved so much betrayed me so bad, but i didnt wanna acknowlegde it, but tbh looking back i can see all the red flags, he used to treat me like shit, he'd get annoyed at me, he'd consistently argue with me, he was jealous of me, it is very obvious looking back to see that he didn't like me, and it hurts, but i'm glad that i can see it clearly that he really didn't deserve me, he treated me like shit, i know my worth and i know better, i deserve better than him.

Been waiting for that new upload 😍😍🙌🏻

It’s better to not get closure from a man just drop them like they dropped u don’t ask why or what went wrong. Trust me they’ll notice and their ego will be hurt that you literally didn’t give a fuck either..when you leave it like that they ALWAYS come back whether you want them to or not.

@toniatonic1973

3 жыл бұрын

So true.

@vmandelaris200

3 жыл бұрын

Preach 🙌

I just love this. I did Call out A ghoster years ago - called him on a private number haha. And it was sweet revenge. Used my compassion against me for six months talking about his sick family member then ghosted out of nowhere. I was super calm and didn’t argue. I’m glad I did now. Also makes me feel better as I felt so ashamed for so long - but you’re right, I was capable of compassion, he was a con man... that tried to reach out again the other day three years later - bye bye boy. No fcking way are you wasting any more of my time, energy, or compassion. Didn’t even respond. Sorry sucker.

Changing the name in the phone. WOW. SO POWERFUL. JUST WOW

Shallon is doing the hard work of logic for us once again 😭❤️ blessed ❤️

the part about 'talk me out of it' reminds me of a hugh jackman film where he says to Ashley Judd about her attitude to her ex - ''You say he's an asshole, he's shit...but you're also saying to him- please prove me wrong'' (paraphrasing)

Pink never look better! Sassy shallon 🔥

You are so wise Shallon, thank you for your great advices, they´ve helped me in so many ways... God bless you. Hugs from Brazil.

I really need to start taking notes on your videos. This was so enlightening

I love the Real Real!! I get a lot of my clothes from there. It’s cool you have a partnership with them.

These videos have been absolute gold! Thank you Shallon for the strategic advice

We missed you Shallon 💜

Incredible video Shallon. Sometimes, after watching so many of your videos I feel like I know it all... but my God, it's like the best slap in the face when I realize it's not the case🤟

This episode is so on point!! Love it

omg I did this for so long and just noticed the crazy amount of pain that exes caused shattered me that much, that I couldn’t believe that was it, so I always like you said (15:52) built a future story where this shit end was just a shit phase and part of our crazy strong love that can justify anything along the way :o

Thank you I can’t express how much this helped me tonight

I don't say how I feel anymore unless I am specifically asked. If you don't care enough to ask then you don't care at all. Period. I don't need you in my life.

Shallon! Missed you but something is up with your audio I can't barely hear you ! Just thought you'd want to know :)

As someone who has received the letters that you shouldn’t send….just don’t send them. If you want any chance at getting whoever this person is back in your life, sending that text is a sure fire way to ruin all your chances.

this video was FULL with wisdom!! thank you shallon!

Este video es lo más! Una sesión free! Best video ever about closure! You are amazing!💋

Your analogies are always spot on and gives great perspective!! ✨🤍

I missed you Shallon

Shallon: The Uncancellable

Beautiful bright pink top!!! Looks super power woman!! Go girl!!! I love watching your videos! 🐙🐙

Shallow you looked stunning with that color and tshirt 😍