How is Lydia not a therapist?? Your energy and empathy jeez💯

@loisewanjiku9075

Жыл бұрын

Lydia has the EQ of the whole of Africa, she should be an ambassador for something world peace.

I’m at a restaurant alone and brought my headphones to watch TMI while I’m eating. Fan from South Carolina, USA 🇺🇸

COLOURISM IS A TOPIC THAT NEEDS TO BE INTENTIONALLY DISCUSSED.....that's a topic people are not ready for.

Slow clap for Lydia. This lady is deep

I just...don't see in what world getting lipo is comparable to skin bleaching. It's comparing oranges to bridges. One is solely based on the looong history of racism, that is still a huuuge problem today, and the perpetuated idea that the closeness to whiteness is the ideal to strive for. Like Lyd said, just because it's not a problem in your life doesn't mean it's not a huge issue - you're privileged in that sense. Skin is something you cannot hide - other people form biases about you immediately when they see you, and for people that DON'T consciously fight that bias means so many dark skinned people are not even given the chance at a lot of jobs (and like Lyd mentioned, even lighter skinned people get more pardoned and are perceived as more attractive, and darker skinned men are perceived as more dangerous by law enforcement). Yes, fatphobia is a problem, but whether you like it or not, there's levels to social issues, and racism and racial identity is always going to take precedence

@wendywangarew6379

Жыл бұрын

The point is home 👏 Also you got me at comparing oranges to bridges😂

@nairobikenya_

Жыл бұрын

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

Sorry about the breakup, Lydia. As expected of a 30+ old who is self aware, I believe you've given it enough thought and the breakup is the healthiest way out so I wish you well ❤

I do feel it's a double standard too.. we change the smallest things about ourselves because of how insecure we've been made to feel about them. As much as racism is a big issue, its understandable that an individual would be insecure about their skin tone, sth they've been made to feel bad about since childhood, and want to change it - to feel better about themselves. Noones insecurities is better or more acceptable, and if changing sth about yourself (no matter how largely it affects the people around you) makes you feel better, you should be allowed to do so in the same judgement

@louisawambui4475

Жыл бұрын

Agreed.

Its 11am here in Zimbabwe and the episode had dropped. Time zones are my favourite thing right now ! Hello inbetweeners!!!!

@tfa4782

Жыл бұрын

Zimbos yeeey

@tfa4782

Жыл бұрын

Zimbos yeeey

Great episode as always! On the liposuction Vs skin bleaching debate and why those two are absolutely not comparable; A successful liposuction could make you 'slim/ petite', and your body size could automatically make a 360 forever! However, no amount of bleaching will ever make a black person 'White'! Because being white is not about complexion. You can transcend body size, you can't transcend race.

Just last week I was thinking this after seeing Saweetie’s interview with Kevin Hart, it’s cute that she loves food because she’s in shape, but if Lizzo was walking around talking about she loves food and fulling her face with cheetos like Saweetie, the same people would be telling her that’s why she’s fat and that she needs to be healthy

59:57 Today Lydia dropped a lot of gems and I'm glad I stuck to the end for this one. I am mind blown! Some relationships are for fine tuning! Some heartbreaks would have hurt less if I knew this, not everything is meant to last forever. Thanks for that!! 🙌

This is hilarious and very true. The pregnant analogy is so beautiful. We clap for pregnant mums but after baby is born and we make noise...accurate. this pressure should stop

The fact that colorism is an issue we have to deal with as Africans is what truly breaks my heart. In a land were black/dark skin is the default, how have we ended up believing that white/lighter skin is better. I know that we can trace it back to colonialism and slave trade but decades after we acquired our own independence, how are we still here??? All in all I think that colorism is a conversation we all need to have as Africans and figure out how we can get our people to love and appreciate their beautiful skin.

You deserve an award for consistency guys, same great content 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌each week. Its giving "If be the change you want to see in the world was a person".

I have trained on sexual harrasment and there's a key point we a re missing here. Sexual harassment is a pattern of unwanted behaviour. Especially after you show/say no. This is oversimplified but yes it is unprofessional to hit on workmates but if someone hits on you, cute or 'ugly' and you show you are not interested and it continues, THEN it enters the realm of sexual harassment. If a workmate hits on you and you say no and they stop, it isn't sexual harassment. This is the simple version, there are nuances of course.

@cikum7636

Жыл бұрын

This makes so much sense. Thanks for sharing 🙏🏽

@knzilani-6635

Жыл бұрын

100%

Colourism is really intense in the job industry🤦

Colorism is a topic not many people are ready for but it happens more often than not. I have been the darkest person in the room since i was young. I saw it first hand. Sadly, it's never going to change. You learn to live with it eventually.

@malkiawaalego2552

Жыл бұрын

You are BEAUTIFUL. If people can’t see that then that’s between them and their optician

@stephaniewakesho1264

Жыл бұрын

I truly relate with you 🥺been the darkest in a family of brown people been bullied coz of that and you truly learn to live with it.

@alvinekotcho1402

Жыл бұрын

So sorry. I was the darkest in my nuclear family even though I was not that dark-skinned and I was called daky. I moved to Europe and got lighter due to the difference in environmental conditions. Nevertheless I still get comments when I go home like "just stay here for a month and you are going to get dark again..." meaning don't think you are better now you can still go back to your darker skin tone if you don't take care" Even here in Europe I get some comments like "you are not as dark as other Africans" and I get really offended. Cuz I know these people would make fun of a darker skin toned person. I don't want to imagine dealing with that everywhere you go.

@speciozaayieko7449

Жыл бұрын

I can totally relate...but now being dark skinned is my strength,where I draw my esteem from and I love it here

@speciozaayieko7449

Жыл бұрын

I can totally relate...but now being dark skinned is my strength,where I draw my esteem from and I love it here

True,I only go to face book to check how my class 3 boyfriend is doing😂

Lyd takes me to school all the time!! great content ladies.

Negativity towards content creation (and people feeling that one may be taking advantage of their followers for money) and creative careers in general comes from the romanticization of the poor struggling creative. It also comes from most people not taking creative careers seriously and feeling like they are nothing more than hobbies. So many people find it hard to accept that creativity can be a source of passion, enjoyment and money. For years creatives have been taken advantage of, for years their ideas have been stolen, for years they have been tricked into accepting gigs that ' pay them in exposure'. Its part of a mindset that is stuck on the old ways and that cant accept the new careers that are coming up.

my two cents on the racial double standard issue vis a vis the weight issue...i can relate more with Murugi's argument. seeing someone bleach doesn't really affect me as much as someone who loses weight does. i'm plus size so it always feels like a betrayal..A rejection of sorts. Anyway loooved the discussion today..kudos peeps

Lydia you need to write a book. you're so so good, you both.

On the issue of liposuction and bleaching, the whole shebang, I think it is premised on the person's reasons. Like I clap so hard for Murugi on her liposuction because, as she has stated countless times, her tummy had become such a point of concern for her to a point hat she let it identify her. Had she said that she got a lipo because women with big stomachs are ugly and unkempt and no real woman deserves to have a big stomach, she would have been cancelled even before she finished the statement. I guess it could also be the same for bleaching. Not necessarily from a point of rejecting the whole race but probably someone who is just not comfortable in their skin colour and is in a position to change it and not from a racial point of view. I do get that for Lydia its touchy because of living as an ethnic minority. So yes, what message are you sending across by whatever changes you're making?

@mollykabuteh7144

Жыл бұрын

And yes, lipo and bleaching are not on a comparable scale. But I'd extend grace to people wanting to identify as whatever they are comfortable. And if we could fast forward to doing away with colourism

Oh Lydia.. this lady is a gem. She needs to be protected at all costs

33:40 👌👌 Thank you Lyd for this!!. I personally have never looked at it from that perspective. Love love this conversation ❤️❤️

Gosh, this is deep. I love the conversation.

I support muruji point on race. Africans don't know they are black until they go to the western world.

My brother is tired with me always saying along to " it's definitely TMI"😂😂😂 I love y'all . Murugi fits my confidence and mukami fits my smartness 💁💁💁💁💁

@_wawira

Жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣 My son is always like.....it's definitely TMI

@knzilani-6635

Жыл бұрын

@@_wawira a

For a minute there i was like, wait..TMI on a Monday??? then i remembered its Wednesday! great episode ladies!

@skolaearley7450

Жыл бұрын

Lol...I can relate

Babout the bleaching topic relating to loosing weight. She brought up Adele loosing weight. I think it is not a double standard. Weight on anyone is not good for health. So loosing weight is not betraying the plus size community. It's taking care of yourself to have a potential longer lifespan. Bleaching is basically made for the purpose that black skin is inferior

@louisawambui4475

Жыл бұрын

It might be your perception that that is how they feel (inferiority) but the reality is that the people doing skin lightening might not share your perception . They might just want to change their looks.

"All these I'm saying do not apply to you or my sisters!" That is just so so cute❤️❤️!

Everything Lydia said on race ans colorism, I agree with.

I actually look forward to this. Your content is good and entertaining.

On bleaching and why it is so hurtful: perfectly and correctly said Lydia. Race is the greatest barrier imposed to systematically impair, subjugate or destroy a particular group. This is a fact. Murugi, think of it like this: most of the other barriers, you are able of “overcoming” (e.g. you can gain wealth, lose weight, obtain an education). However, race is a barrier that cannot be “auto-liberated”: i.e. capable of being overcome by a single individual. Actually, it is this belief in autoliberation (see Kanye West) that continues to hold the Black community back.

I thought being a foodie was someone interested in foods from different countries. I did not associate it with wanting to eat food all the time. Infact, most foodies i know have a good palette and they know where to find tasty food and good ethic foods from different countries.

@hottensiakabuki3572

Жыл бұрын

I share similar sentiments..The word foodie has no connotation on the amount of food one wants to consume but rather the diversity of the food

About food I used to be like "why take an extra large milkshake" when I see a thick person but God did me justice now am thick with a tummy that looks like am forever 4months pregnant 😂😂😂😂

@periswerimo8

Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂

@nemiwambu4223

Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂ahhhhh

@DiamondQuality1

Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂

@mariadaphne

Жыл бұрын

Waaahhh. XL ni biggie though. 😂😂😂

@terryscoffer

Жыл бұрын

My night is made 😂😂🤣😂😂😂🤣

I'm always here on Wednesday waiting for these ladies to drop it💯..and we've got to admit that they're working extremely hard to give us such long and amazing content.be blessed ladies 🤩

The makeup person is doing justice to the eyes/shadow. Murugi, your dress becomes you. I love it. It's true. What you do now with your body, plays a big part later. But genes play a BIG part. I'll remember always to give grace. I do the double standards in my head sometimes. When talking about having children as a woman, made me think of the single mothers. They're shunned upon, the world is never satisfied.

Is that a wild Murugi dress. Cute cute

Lyd thanks for articulating the topic about colorism. Thank you both for delivering these segments.

BODY COUNT MATTERS. Too much of anything is poisonous. As a religious person I believe that anyone who is actively trying to adult-er outside of marriage is not someone you want as a marriage partner. That person will treat your union as a confinement not to adult-er instead of a freedom now to enjoy physical pleasure in the safety of marriage.

@joykiru8858

Жыл бұрын

The double standard is that for men it's okay but for ladies it's not

@artiesimba3197

Жыл бұрын

@@joykiru8858 As i stated my opinion is that its never okay for both. When you empower women to act like men it has resulted in the rise of countless abortions, wrecked wombs, fatherless children and 35 year old women who associate feminism with adultery. The double standard is there for your own benefit. But do you and reap what you saw.

@esthermutahi2811

Жыл бұрын

Are you perfect? You want to tell me you have been living a religious with perfection with no mistakes How you choose to view life and judge people is wrong.

@esthermutahi2811

Жыл бұрын

@@joykiru8858 The problem is the English.

@artiesimba3197

Жыл бұрын

@@esthermutahi2811 The only perfect man to have walked this earth was "Christ". As I stated "ACTIVELY" , hence your point "comprehension of English is the issue". I am a sinner, but i know what I have done is a sin. It is always harder to do the right thing so having a partner that chooses the easy way out in all situations is a bad choice.

Lydia Lydia Lydia my my my you are so deep its mind blowing........just watching this episode! I Came across TMI cause I was following murugi. you guys are actually changing my life and thinking in so many ways and the way you compliment each other makes a perfect duo!! You disagree to agree you bring different ideologies on the podcast. Am soooo glad I came across your podcast am ugandan. This episode was triggering(the racism part) and eye opening and shows how we as african/black people in the diaspora and back in Africa view racism very interesting.

Lyd that dilemma had you throw in a very serious-toned accent in there love it I feel the same, you need someone you can reason with, someone that cares about sth more than them

Lydia, you are so wise! Thank you ladies for this episode.

I'm 28 years and I'm 50kgs,..and I'm not foodie like I literally don't get hungry,I can stay a whole day without eating anything maybe take tea ,even when I have an early duty ...I think two years ago I was so standing and I had a very nice body,but now I'm starting to feel too tiny and I'm not so happy about it,I have the confidence yeah,but I wanna add some weight,..so there's nothing like body goals,I think it's just how you feel about yourself

I have really enjoyed this episode. Thought provoking! I LOVE and appreciate you ladies.! Love from the land down under!❤️

On the bleaching matter, I agree with Lydia, I don't think it's a double standard because as she said, race is a deeper issue in our community, and obviously the idea of lighter is better is from the colonizers. Racial profiling was deep during those slavery days, and even the idea that a mixed kid was better than the black..... I think that's a sensitive topic globally, because white supremasists still exist to date, hence bleaching is not necessarily a double standard. But to each their own. I love you guys❤

Wow ,wow,Murugi a good listener,lydia here just throwing Gems right left and centre👌👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

I was sooo happy to know it's TMI and this new episode...it was soo informative💜💜💜

These ladies are so real. Love ❤️

I'm literally eating as I watch 😂😂and coincidentally hear Nelly does it too

It's sad that 'light skinned' persons get more favour than the 'dark skinned' ones. I know how it feels because my parents did that my younger sister is light skinned and I have chocolate tone but like a year ago you couldn't convince me that I wasn't dark. They'd emphasize that some colours are for my sister but for me only black fits me..... Weh it was bad bad but now I am over that but I'm so much aware of how colourism is a thing

Lydia you're so smart and aware!!! I've enjoyed this conversation especially the issue on colourism then the transition to bleaching

People will talk whether you do bad or good. I learnt to just do me. The major financial contribution to my family unit is by me but people assume my achievement is bcoz of "my man" I learnt to move on from this and live my best life yet while everyone else talks and I'm very fulfilled 🥰

I love you ladies 🥰🥰 I'm lucky at least I'm 20 now I can take this knowledge to my life

Queens looking good😍😍👌🏾. Vibes🔥🔥, si mnapenda vawulens sana of late😂😂😂, I'm here for it, ukweli usemwe😅👏🏾. #Colourism talk needs its own episode.

me also growing with every episode, just love

Murugi.... Well done Your energies match so well.

"Ugly man" sorry to say but there's always one in every office and they think they can have you...... oooh Tom😅😅😅😅 I've laughed 😅 🤣 😂

@raychonmulungi7538

Жыл бұрын

I don't know why this is so funny🤣

@susannyokabi3358

Жыл бұрын

Especially IT guys😅😅

@mercysila4357

Жыл бұрын

@@susannyokabi3358 so true🤣🤣🤣

@mercysila4357

Жыл бұрын

@@raychonmulungi7538 🤣🤣🤣

I think you misunderstood her dilemma. Feom what I understood, she’s saying her man brushes away her interests in certain topics as “you’re wasting your life on nonsense that does not add value to you” and he does it constantly. So if it’s not your career, ni udaku. Yk?

Love your content so much ❤️❤️

Such wholesome content🤗

Am your biggest fan..always looking forward..amazing Content as usual

I always go by the law of does this serve me better ? if yes I post if not I don't , whatever everyone else comments or says about it is just that, opinion.

My babes 😘😍aki mnakaa firi...nawapenda walae😘😘😘

Can we talk about how eating disorders have taken over a lot of people especially young adults...I literally just watched the LNN episode last Saturday and I can totally relate😍

Another double Standard I have seen on Tiktok is blaming being overweight on genetics. I was triggered but even here in kenya we can see people who have been overweight a long time put in the work and get fit, Amina Mude and yvette obura, off the top of my head.

@keipearlz

Жыл бұрын

For some people it is genetic and caused by insulin resistance.For anyone who is having difficulty losing weight it is always best to go to a doctor and get full bloodwork done. Jumping from diet to diet or exercise regime to exercise regime may be pointless if one does not start with understanding vitals and basics of how their body and hormones are working.

@louisawambui4475

Жыл бұрын

You are talking from a point of privilege. Why would it even trigger you if you haven't gone through the journey? What you don't know about those people is that they would have to put more effort to maintain it as opposed to someone who hasn't had weight challenges. By the way Yvette's body reacted to her weight loss(rapid) and she became sick.

Lydia is violated and Tom from IT needs to get arrested 🤣

Lydia on this one about weight(murugi's lipo) and colorism, you are off the mark according to me. On some topics, we have to have a global and local view. As a plus size in Kenya, the discrimination we face is great and our identities end up being attached personally or by society. Lipo or any other surgical intervention would makes some people view you as plastic and say that you are now not real just as if a dark person were to lighten their skin, they would be seen as inauthentic or hating on themselves. It would be double standard to accept one and reject the other making the changes. Locally , racism is not a major issue but colorism and weight is. Globally, racism would be the bigger issue.

Me still waiting for my husband to see me and hear me , always feels like he forgets that i have feelings too ….. love you ladies , love from TZ♥️

@malkiawaalego2552

Жыл бұрын

Mkalishe uzungumze naye. No one can read your mind.

@magalienia6958

Жыл бұрын

@HappinessKipeja...please use ya words,don't wait for him to see/hear u coz he's not clairvoyant. Speak up/utter words...ask for what u need, say what u mean,mean what u say! All the best!

No little league, TMI majors all podcasts..period...#I am Ugandan and you should see me advertising TMI like I am Kenyan...

Lydia with the wisdom 👏

About food I am a plus size and I love it that way...ukinipata nimeongeza kilo probably am depressed otherwise I maintain....

Love from America 🇺🇸 always TMI🥰😍

God I almost got late!😂😭😭 Wednesdays are currently my fav day of the week. 😍

So men should be able to show emotions but you won't let yours cry🙄

I’m with Lydia on the race thing, Joan really needs to open her eyes to what’s actually going on. Race is one of it not the biggest issue we’re facing today! Lydia is so aware and I’m here for it.

Tom from IT was minding his business then😂😂

I'm mexican and colorism is a big part of mexico too. Even my grandmother being darker makes comments in a negative way about family members being darker than others. It's sad because she is darker herself and has a nice tan color tone. 😢

As per the usual.....love Wednesdays because TMI

Medical Doctors are equally held to an unreasonable standard. You are not allowed to be human..at the moment I have doctor friends in the counties who have gone 4 months without pay but ppl expect them not to make a fuss out of it and to continue working with a smile on their faces. Yaani it is too much!

First one here. Leo haijakuwa premiere 😭

I don't support 50/50 split of bills in a relationship or at home.....Ironically I live in the Netherlands (Dutch) if you know what I mean 😆

The changing how you look has a double standard. If lightening your skin color is rejecting your community, then why don't you apply the same judgement to straightening hair? We have kinkier hair compared to white people, same way we have darker skin. So why is changing hair acceptable but skin isn't?

@lavishlovergirl

Жыл бұрын

Hair is not permanent. Plus some black people naturally have straight hair. My best friend in high school has straight hair from birth... I know a couple of others. Assuming that all black people have kinky hair is quite reckless.

@keipearlz

Жыл бұрын

skin is next level- a totally different wavelength

@yyoung1574

Жыл бұрын

@@lavishlovergirlI said we have kinkier hair, regardless of where one falls on the curl pattern, its still kinkier. And in the same way that a black person could have a looser curl pattern, a black person could also have a lighter skin tone. This is not an either or situation, I'm just saying its a double standard because skin is judged harshly compared to other aspects that identify us as black people.

@binaonderi9499

Жыл бұрын

It is definitely a double standard.

Murugi 😍

double standard on seeing people that bleach as unacceptable while changing your body size is different! Bleaching makes you identify as more beautiful, just like reducing the size of your stomach, maybe gives you more confidence.

Its definitely TMI ...🥳🥳🥳gets me always I have been waiting for a week🥰

About COLOURISM can we talk about the good side. I'm personally dark and I really get soo much attention, men with means, opportunities and all of that. I totally agree with what you guys are saying but there's levels to beauty...not all darkskins should be classified in one group..not all of them wish were lighter or sth...featuris( shape of your nose, smooth skin, lip size)affect a person's beauty...you might be light but you have big facial features..trust me .you're still not going to get that job. A good example Ryan Destiny or Justine Skye or from Kenya Care Wahu all dark skin women...sheesh these women get soo much attention than most light women because they just pretty and it's noticable. BOTTOM LINE: IF YOU ARE GOOD LOOKING YOU ARE JUST GOOD LOOKING WHETHER LIGHT OR DARK. THATS UNBEATABLE 🔥👌

@keipearlz

Жыл бұрын

featurism is firmly rooted in anti blackness and its just the other side of the colourism coin.It is all an attempt to get closer to what colonialism and racism has made black ppl strive for and consider beautiful.There is no good side to colourism-sorry.The broad features you speak of are very much part of the African look so all you have done is create a step in the ladder of oppression to put yourself 'above' women you feel are below you because they don't have small facial features.

@wachirajuliah7193

Жыл бұрын

but what about the darkskin who are not considered attractive .

@keipearlz

Жыл бұрын

@@wachirajuliah7193 What makes a person unattarctive to you and why? that is the main question everyone should be asking themselves.

@cookwithmaryannemwisa7353

Жыл бұрын

@@keipearlz featurism plays a huge role on attractiveness. Featurism is how the face is molded. Feminine looking features on women such as a small nose, tiny or well shaped lips, smooth skin, pretty eyes...all affect a person's beauty. So yeah apart from colour those are some of the other things that separate people in terms of beauty levels. Someone may be light but average at best because of big facial features . So I guess I have answered your question. Check out dark girls like official Christinekendi, Kate actress, chelsy_, Kim kardicey , Wayu_wayua, Genevieve the Nigerian actress and so many other women ..they're all elevated coz off features.( The Black beauty effect) is super charming. People will simply notice it. 👌 So I guess I have answered your question babe💕☺️

@keipearlz

Жыл бұрын

@@cookwithmaryannemwisa7353 No you have not answered my question because you are a bit lost in the sauce.You are not using words/concepts correctly. Features and featurism are not the same thing...Just like race and racism are different. You have so much to learn babe but thank God the internet is here

I love Lydia so much 😭

I don't think people are ready for the Colourism conversation,,,being the darkest person in the room,,,I remember when I was a child I guess at 8 one of my elder cousins was even like and who is the darkest person here in a very shady way,,,so when Lydia says that I understand

I'm here early today..Yaay☺️❤️

Lydia is a gem. Marriage is overrated. I think pple need to be told as many times as it’ll take to get through to them, MARRIAGE IS NOT AN ACHIEVEMENT. A very married Kitt Kiarie said it the other day and I agree with her 150%. Would you rather be a Mrs and continue staying married to a man who emotionally and physically abuses you and vice versa or would you rather be single, content and happy ..

Ya l agree with Lydia we live in a world where a dark skinned girl has to prove a lot to look more beautiful and that's just not cool....

One time we had a patient refuse to be seen by black senior doctor because in the crowd he had one white medical student... The patient preferred the student! Still shook when I think about it

Lydia knows so many random facts. 😂 bleaching cream and Coca-Cola In Indian. Chinese men preferred to black women 😂

Maisha London!!! 😂😂😂

Bf from class 3 can be stalked on Facebook 🤣

Let's just say the rate of insecurities is high. And daily we learn to unlearn

Murugi 😂 boyfriend from class 3😂

Gurrrl I'm 52kgs at 26 and the amount of food I eat 😆😆if it's got no cheese or butter btw count me out...a total foodie forever!!! Junkie for life and at times I do it wanting to add some weight

@brendaimani4072

Жыл бұрын

Girl you're my goals 😂 I'm 21 and at 70kgs😹😹

@susannyokabi3358

Жыл бұрын

@@brendaimani4072 😅😅😅😅

@Eddahtattooenthusiast

Жыл бұрын

@@brendaimani4072 honeey you are beautiful and perfect just as you are ..... I get critics for what you term as "body goals" so at the end of the day it'll never be enough ....♥️

@brendaimani4072

Жыл бұрын

@@Eddahtattooenthusiast aww thanks so much babes❤️ I'm sending body positivity to you too