Yooooo this is crazy. I was doing work whilst watching this. When he used ‘I’ I didn’t pay attention and as soon as he used ‘you’ I stopped work and started listening

@Kyrelel

4 жыл бұрын

You missed it. After he told the story the first time he then said "I am going to tell you the same story ...", this is the first time you know about it, (he deliberately did not tell you before the first iteration) and _that_ is the part that made you listen as you are now actively comparing your recollection of the first story with the new version. He then changed his speech pattern with more (and shallower) high-to-low cadences (he previously used low-to-high cadences) and different body language. He also changed parts of the story (despite telling you that it was the same story) and every time a detail changes you start to take more notice without realising it. So, in short, what he was saying was actually not all that relevant ... he was manipulating you by making you focus on the wrong thing. It would also have worked the other way round (starting with 'You' and changing to 'I")

@anthonygumingo9840

4 жыл бұрын

@@Kyrelel Damn, well done

@72marshflower15

3 жыл бұрын

To the point Reviews .. meh, could just be your individualistic socialization.. Me me me me me ..

Dude is literally like a real-life movie character.

@benjaminschwartz1242

4 жыл бұрын

You cant "literally" be "like" anything. Literally indicates literal language. Using "like" is a simile, which is figurative language, the opposite of literal. Stop using the word "literally"...please.

@chesscomsupport8689

4 жыл бұрын

@@benjaminschwartz1242 Ok I will literally stop using it

@benjaminschwartz1242

4 жыл бұрын

@@chesscomsupport8689 that's incorrect as well, as the only time it's necessary to use the word "literally" is when there could possibly be a discrepancy in the listener's/reader's mind as to whether the language you're using is figurative or literal. Since your sentence above is very obviously literal, the use of the word "literally is not needed. I know you're just joking...but man. People all of a sudden started using that word a couple years ago because they think it makes them sound smart, but it has the opposite effect because most people use it incorrectly as you did.

@blacktortoise6812

4 жыл бұрын

I will literally critique this literature.

@HC-gm4fo

4 жыл бұрын

I think the duality of his contradiction illustrates his point perfectly. “Literally” In his statement Refers to the Phrase “like a real-life movie character” being taken literally after always using the simile as an exaggeration.

This is beyond true. Going deeper, that's why Facebook doesn't let you use "you" with negative connotations when writing advertising copy on Facebook ads.

@TheNimbleOwl

4 жыл бұрын

advertising copy, relatable

@mr_niceman

4 жыл бұрын

King lmao

@Kevin-kj5th

4 жыл бұрын

Never realized that!

You made an beautiful point at the beginning on every word having an emotional impact. A strange thing about words is that before you can begin to accept or reject them, they have already entered your neurology.

I hear that it helps. But can we also just acknowledge that when using 'you' he uses a better voice and intonation for story telling, as compared to when he was using 'I'

@AnonAnon1

4 жыл бұрын

That was probably his point

@TheSpoegefugl

4 жыл бұрын

@@AnonAnon1 That is exactly not his point. I'm pointing out, that while he is using his second version of the story, where he is also using "you" instead of "I", he is also using other, and better, story telling techniques than in the first version. I don't believe that these are a coincidental thing by using "you", as utilizing "you" should have an effect on the listener and not the speaker. It seems he is using multiple techniques in the second to improve the story further, but is only highlighting 1 technique, so we'll notice that one.

@Vgk36

2 жыл бұрын

@@TheSpoegefugl I thought he was saying that because he wants you to use the word you to engage them more??? But I actually wanted to be a negotiator when he was saying I lol I'm confused. Hahaha

@HipHopAn0n

2 жыл бұрын

That may have been his reaction to the people actually sitting still and paying attention.

I noticed when he said the story with “I” the group was less interested, had body posture, looked bored. Once he used “You” with the same story everyone was still and focused or thinking.

@ngashmir

4 жыл бұрын

It seemed as if the story was more interesting also.

@MichaelP-ke1tm

4 жыл бұрын

I was bored of both stories

@brendan2868

4 жыл бұрын

Yeh because you statements are invasive

@TechOutAdam

4 жыл бұрын

brendan2868 Statements are invasive?

@TechOutAdam

4 жыл бұрын

Patrick It seems like you’ve heard it all before.

Voss you are a genius. Would you be opposed to posting new videos on this venue? It seems like all the videos are old news. Watching these videos feels like I want to see more about your communication approach in hostage negotiation, etc.

It works. He lost me on the first story. He kept me listening on the second.

Everyone here learning to close multi million dollar deals and I just want to negotiate effectively with my 5 year old daughter.

I always appreciate your thoughts and insights. Thank you so much

Looks at guys who are chewing: "you can have buffet of choices" - brilliant!

What I took from this is I need to use more “you” phrasing in an aware way to keep the person’s focus on themselves so we can process through their emotional resistance to our collaboration.

@ParakeetWhispererKing

4 жыл бұрын

Balance Mode Sounds like “we” would be better there

As a linguist currently using ethnography of communication to research how people talk about change, stability and continuity this video is a brilliant illustration how important the way we speak/communicate is...and how u aware of it most of us are...

@drgLACity

Жыл бұрын

Idk… I was paying more attention when Chris Voss was talking about his experience in the first person because he’s a friggen LEGEND. I wanted to hear Chris Voss’s experience not Dave Gastelum lol

So simple yet so impactful

Um... how is this free information!!! Feels like I just watched a stream of life events where this scenario has played out and I had no idea... Now I'm friggen armed 🤘 Thank y'all for freely sharing such freaking important wise!

Damn that was so clean. This dude is a boss

Always great stuff!

Excellent! You rock!

Thank you teacher , subtle and invisible . I use to always lose attention to detail with my words. Big mistake but we live and learn ✨✨💖

I appreciate you so much.

I loved your book Chris!

Great video. It was like in our class in Boston

Fantastic!

thank you, Chris I have time now to study from you Master

Thank you I needed this lesson 🙏

You ve changed my way of thinking, you ve changed my life Thank you ❤

@mjay3683

3 жыл бұрын

Couldn’t agree more!!

Black Swan Group is awesome! I can't wait to sign up. Chris Voss is an excellent instructor.

@judichristopher4604

4 жыл бұрын

What? You can sign up to be in the group? Please tell me more!! I wanted to take his master class..

Grats on masterclass.

Wutt?! When he used "I" for the story I couldn't really get what he was saying (I wasn't really paying attention to what's the story about), but when he used "you" Then the story actually makes sense. At first I though, because he repeated the story which make it clearer for me, but really it's using the word "you" Instead of "I" Makes the difference. This is amazing

I'm so glad videos from Black Swan Group are short. I happen to lose attention pretty soon, as they are hard to consume, especially for non-native speakers.

I swear google can read my thoughts I’m on a train thinking about this exact same idea

This is FIRE! The butterfly is about to emerge from its cacoon ('',)

My God. Dons. The extra trick is he told the story twice which made the listeners listen closer for a twist "why would he tell the same story twice" This just goes to show you that business IS personal. IT's nothing personal, just business. YOU have to understand my hand was forced... our relationship in this circumstance isn't personal, you understand its business. You' know you got me to watch this as the first video, You' have a new subscriber.

@dandyandy2046

4 жыл бұрын

I had to pause and go back because I thought the video skipped!

I have watched over this 6 minute video for like 30 minutes. This man looks like he knows

This explains why Trump often speaks in the 3rd person. Speaking in the 3rd person avoids the "me" and "I" that does harm to interest.

Legit thank you.

@NegotiationMastery

3 жыл бұрын

Happy to help

Where can I get these slides?

If you want to take this a lot further, consider the difference on the limbic system of prepositions in different languages:

more of these

He changed the word and the tone+ tempo.

I'd have loved, if the presentation would have been white text on black background. The lighting in the room is rather low. When the presentation came, it blinded like looking into an car headlight.

@thekneebreaker4790

4 жыл бұрын

Is that racist? You cant call things black or white any more, its "object of colour" or "object of no colour "

He's right about how boring Quantico is. We were stationed there for 3 years (USMC), but we understood the significance of the part it plays in our country.

@Ravie1

4 жыл бұрын

I spent part of my childhood in quantico's back yard. Growing up I thought driving for hours to go somewhere interesting was normal. Really isn't much to do there is there.

@y.z.6517

4 жыл бұрын

@@Ravie1 Is there internet there? I can survive with a heated room with a laptop.

He'd be a great guest on JRE

2:25 he took a second to analyze how the class didn’t find the joke funny

When you get an ad on a video of the channel that provides the ad... 🤔

1:02 “I think I’m underdressed”

I'm already a fan. I own "Never Split the Difference." However, I just texted the message to 22828 and got "service access denied." Is it restricted to certain networks? I'm on T-Mobile.

@semja

4 жыл бұрын

Lol

First of first,You guys are amazing,wanna know why you left a job as fbi negotiator

@mr_niceman

4 жыл бұрын

Sushant Thakur old age? Or they just want to teach instead of going in field mission lol

@Kevin-kj5th

4 жыл бұрын

Money. This guy is making way more than he ever did working for FBI

Does this work with the phrase “one”, as in when one goes to quantico?

@ParakeetWhispererKing

4 жыл бұрын

Ariston Sparta Sounds like a description in 3rd person

@AristonSparta

4 жыл бұрын

@Ryan Reed in academia when referring to others in writing, using “you” is discouraged. We are taught to use “one” instead. (such as oneself)

@journeyfortwo5211

4 жыл бұрын

@@AristonSparta Sure, but it's not as engaging as "you". Everyone's favourite subject is theirself

@lawrencebrock8776

4 жыл бұрын

I think it adds a condescending tone.

@fidget2020

4 жыл бұрын

Lawrence Brock Not in academic writing, which by definition should not be emotional or personal.

You have same suggestion about probability and statistic way sensitive

To be honest I was more interested when he told the story the first time, maybe it was you could see what he was doing the second time. Though it is interesting, might be something to it alright, just concerned we are hungry for confirmation of the idea. Perhaps, it would require a more controlled environment without the clues in the title to be objective etc..

@D00NBU66Y

2 жыл бұрын

Was looking through the comments and glad I saw yours because I too was more engaged with the "I" story. I think you and I were this way bc we came here to learn and so paid more attention to another epic Chris Voss story before realizing the "you" strategy. At 05:19 he explains it perfectly for us -- it's context driven. I paused the video and thought had I encountered this type of conversation in the sales industry, the "you" story would definitely have my attention more than listening to a salesman talk about him/herself. Just my thoughts, friend!

Which one of you gave it a thumbs down? It seems like you know something, we don't? Would you mind sharing it?

@phillipmorgan4260

4 жыл бұрын

Joel Garcia David Blaine fans

Question? Is this a clip from the masterclass that your advertising? Thank you 🔥💪

@Brandon-gw4ed

4 жыл бұрын

No, it's not I have the Masterclass. It's great you should purchase it if you have a chance.

@ElementsBJJCanada

4 жыл бұрын

Brandon N Thank you!

@tikitaka8042

4 жыл бұрын

I enjoyed his instruction on masterclass. I watched over and over so far.

@MichaelP-ke1tm

4 жыл бұрын

@@Brandon-gw4ed Or not

@Brandon-gw4ed

4 жыл бұрын

​@@MichaelP-ke1tm Yea, dude or not.

Is this the Hogwarts magic psychology clas, which I have signed up for, after accidentally ingesting some warlock truffle blubber from the meadows of despair?

@phreezleva4568

4 жыл бұрын

Lmao. Whaaaaat?

The bar n then he reinforced the bar because that is the most commonly known fact they can relate to

It seems / it sounds / it looks; you seem / you sound / you look -- not, "what I'm hearing is..."

3 David Blaine fans seen this

🤘🏼

Late night FM DJ voice

The same knife can hurt or create a beautiful meal, doesn’t it? So how we use language, and words in particular is key. I vs U ... “You disgust me!” vs “I was disgusted!” The first version “points” some “blame” for the feeling felt ... the second showed the “feeling phenomenon” is attributed to the person who felt it. How can I improve the following statement? ... “I feel you are wrong!”

@djscott9207

4 жыл бұрын

"You may be right." / "I disagree."

@MichaelP-ke1tm

4 жыл бұрын

I am disgusted by you

@pinoynga

4 жыл бұрын

Patrick , hi! ... now we’re getting there! ... LOL ... cheers! .. seriously ... communication is a science ... it requires knowledge & skills pretty much like studying medicine. All we’ve been taught is to speak. Full stop.

@nutritionandphysiology8023

4 жыл бұрын

I don't think that's correct.

@Hellkinglol

4 жыл бұрын

You feel you're right?

Can't understand why some people in the room are not paying attention to Chris. First it is rude , second it is stupid. The guy giving out applicable , usable knowledge ...

Is this similar to the material you cover in your “MasterClass”?

@judichristopher4604

4 жыл бұрын

What Mater Class??? I want to know about his Master Class... LOL

@MastermindStrategies

4 жыл бұрын

Judi Christopher It’s just an online thing. These ads run on many of my social media platforms. I would assume tailored to my viewing preferences. Here’s a link I copied. www.masterclass.com/classes/chris-voss-teaches-the-art-of-negotiation?Paid&Facebook&Aq-Prospecting&Video-Thrive&CV

Just a quick heads up, and I suspect you are already quite aware of this: speaking as an analyst type, when Voss told the story about Quantico using "you", it came across as extremely off-putting, because it made bold assumptions and sweeping generalizations about experiences that I didn't have, events that may have happened quite differently, were I in his shoes at the time, choices I might have made differently, and essentially positing himself as having mentally ensconced me, subtly trying to obtain advantage. It comes off as a cheap play for a lesser player, disrespectful, pushing me into a more adversarial mode than cooperative.

@N0B0DY_SP3C14L

4 жыл бұрын

I offered this insight with the hope that it will be taken into account, and addressed in a lesson/video which helps clarify and distinguish the three negotiating types, and how to address their specific needs and wants, as well as approaches and tactics to avoid, because despite the fact that we all have limbic systems and amygdalas, they are keyed to gather, sort, process and assign information in different ways, hence the typology. It seems probable that MBTI typing plays heavily into this, and by determining or acquiring the type of one's counterpart, wasting time and energy on counterproductive activies in the negotiation, may be minimized, if not avoided entirely.

Damn.. I thought it said Rich Voss

"OHHHHH NOOOOO" This Video is too short... I want more!!!!

@Cluby2

4 жыл бұрын

Judi Christopher haha. Sign up for his Masterclass!

@yuridelcastillo220

4 жыл бұрын

Judi - Subscribe and buy his book "Never Split The Difference" - "Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It" - On Audible. . .

lol he sold the place on his first two lines

Can you notice the amount of comments here that have "I" in them. Lol

The only diference was the tone voice.

@TwHPrOx

4 жыл бұрын

You got that right. But not entirely.One of them was the tone of his voice. He is so used to inflicting what he wants on people, using several tools like voice, posture, hand gesture, choice of words, that he uses them while teaching to better show to others the effect. Sometimes the effect of what he tries to show is subtle alone. But the total sum is easy to notice.

Chris Voss smiling = 😬

"Thumbs UP"

Hmm i found the "I" story more interesting than the "you" one

@TheRadicalCentrist.1776

4 жыл бұрын

As did I. I hate the use of "you" to relate personal experiences. Just tell me what you experienced; I'll make up my own mind as to whether I would feel the same.

@julioseviltwin2304

4 жыл бұрын

@@TheRadicalCentrist.1776 in fact he is telling from his experience. The _You_ is him telling the story as a 3rd person to himself. The audience are listening but the perspective of the use of _You_ becomes subliminal to listener, they'll empathise to the experience. Experiencing the experience.

@clbazar

4 жыл бұрын

Yes, I did as well. Although from a marketing/persuasion point of view, “you” tends to be thought of as a much more powerful word. Maybe it’s because the story was more personal when using “I”, which of course it was, and therefore more authentic.

It . god. You. Body.

Body lenguage

Soda! ( So- me saying this, definitely triggered someone, somewhere, somehow?)

Personally, I paid more attention when he used “I” I felt like I was relating to his story and was in his shoes. When he used “You” the story felt less personal, I think due to the fact that he was speaking to a crowd and that he really wasn’t speaking directly to me.

😂😂😂😂😂😂⚽️⚽️⚽️⚽️⚽️😂😂😂

WHAT IS YOUR PASSWORD ?

This is NLP on steroids

@EktaShah82

4 жыл бұрын

tatsumakisempyukaku what it is is human nature

i emplore you oversee and editautoclose caption this closed caption is an amathema toyour purpose and astu bling block to mya sorption and understanding

Body le guage

And you thought this was just a Japanese thing.

OK, OK, OK! I'll let the hostages go, put the money back in the safe and then go home and retrain as a -librarian- -pizza chef- -lion tamer- hostage negotiator...

Ah, i must be missing something cause both stories had zero engagement. Maybe he should have changed the story cause once i felt it was repeating i tuned the nonsense out.

The classroom looks like a bunch of jocks sitting in while the country collapses..

I don’t know what kind of convention this is, but allowing people to eat while giving a talk is disgusting. “Blue-Shirt’s” body language makes his awareness of impropriety evident.

Amateur…the word is THEY. When you say THEY, it implies US. You and me…and THEM. Can’t go that low in price? “Sorry brother (name), THEY won’t accept that…head office will just email the invoice request back to me and ask me to change my mistake”. You see? Fact is…when you type emails, DON’T be professional. You are just “a guy” that wants to help them out. Use casual language the same as you’re reading right now….right? Start a sentence with “Hmmm….yeah, I see what you mean” . Be human.

IT. WHAT IS IT ?. IT IS WHAT ?. THIS GUY IS old hat. Good for newbs fresh outa sack.

I’ve never herd such nonsense.