“Bill, I have NEVER had this happen in my medical career...” “Oh, please don’t tell me you lost your wedding ring up there” 🤣

@nickdejager8873

3 жыл бұрын

Better the wedding ring than the cellular phone.

@sharkdentures3247

3 жыл бұрын

“Bill, I have NEVER had this happen in my medical career...” . . . . ."There are FIVE things you never want to hear, as a man!"

@susanroberts1343

3 жыл бұрын

@@nickdejager8873 Love it!

You are killing me Bill. I'm laying here next to my sleeping hubby and I'm trying to laugh into a pillow without suffocating!!

@barrydlewis7768

2 жыл бұрын

Funny. True

@davecrupel2817

2 жыл бұрын

Stifling it somehow makes everything so much funnier!

Bill is like a fine wine, gets better with age!

I am a urology nurse practitioner. I tell every one of my patients to come here and watch this video and the stent pull video after we pull their stent in the office…almost like required watching!

@donarthiazi2443

Жыл бұрын

Seriously? You mean he wasn't just kidding about that?

"Not to be to graphic, i have a thread hangin out of my weener!" Prettu graphic but i died laughing 😂

@oldiesgeek454

4 жыл бұрын

I prefer the term Pee Pee... But that's just me.

@slytherinqueen6149

4 жыл бұрын

Well now he knows what its like to have a tampon in. Lol

@BackstreetsAngel7

4 жыл бұрын

Omg I was laughing so hard I saw tears!!!

@amandawyllis9826

4 жыл бұрын

Welcome to life with a tampon LOL 😂 🤣

@ozzieray

4 жыл бұрын

It hurts me just listening

There's something about a 58 year old man saying "wiener" that just made me lose it and laugh so hard I cried 😂

Hilarious!..... without cussing....true talent!

“Well, Bill, you have a small urethra.” *Hank Hill cries*

@scottyj6226

3 жыл бұрын

C-3-H-8 WHO DO WE APRECIATE? PROPANE PROPANE PROOOOOOPANE

@ronfullerton3162

2 ай бұрын

"When you are down on the farm, and you want to stay warm, Propane"!

I don't about y'all, but I am ready for another BLUE COLLAR TOUR!!! I LOVE THESE GUYS...Bill Engvall can do 3hrs without a single cuss word and be just as funny as an Eddie Murphy

@ladym2398

4 жыл бұрын

Me too. Way overdue. He's hilarious!

@yrusonoz5574

4 жыл бұрын

Exactly 😎

@quacklovesparanormal2041

4 жыл бұрын

Seen them all live, except for Jeff.

@bettycogswell9851

4 жыл бұрын

That's because he is a true comedian.....Think back to the 60's, 70's or even 50's. People didn't need to be foul and were the funniest...

@gsdfan8455

4 жыл бұрын

Mike Quackenbush the only one I didn’t see was Larry

“I don’t even sew!” DEAD. LOL

I didn't know it was possible to cringe so hard and laugh at the same time!!

@marycampbell8855

3 жыл бұрын

Perfectly said!

@The-Assassin-From-Hell

Жыл бұрын

well honey im doin' that right now!

He'd make a great Hank Hill. Already got the narrow urethra.

@StreetRide845

4 жыл бұрын

Only a man with a narrow urete would say that

@danigrl86

4 жыл бұрын

Yeass!

@wyndiahighwind7477

4 жыл бұрын

Don't insult Mr. Engvall like that.

@collinscody57

4 жыл бұрын

But he has two kids

@AnitaChapmanDeeta

4 жыл бұрын

Mr. RADICAL exactly my first thought, too.

Everything he said is spot on. Kidney Stones are torture. I'd rather be waterboarded instead of another kidney stone.

@logancurry3835

2 жыл бұрын

agreed.

@ef7558

2 жыл бұрын

I’d rather be sentenced to a Turkish prison than have another kidney stone!

@adamheddins7743

11 ай бұрын

Yes sir I just had mine had four of them they had to bust up had the same procedure as bill had

I have laughed so hard at his jokes. The best comedian I have ever listened to

Bill becomes more and more like Hank Hill everyday.

Bill Engvall is comedic genius. An entire comedy show and not a single cuss word.

@epdlp4506

4 жыл бұрын

Well, great comedians do not need faul language. For example you have another of my favorite comedians: SINBAD.kzread.info/dash/bejne/Z6SA3MiShtXIn7A.html

@kwayne8205

4 жыл бұрын

He hasnt had a cuss word in any of his stand-up even 20 years ago he didn't cuss

@epdlp4506

4 жыл бұрын

@@kwayne8205 he doesn't need to use faul language. His stories are so real that everyone can relate to them and laugh. I was in rehab after my brain tumor was removed so I can relate to was he was telling about rehab centers and hospitals. Which at least in Los Angeles they treat you great with great service and even vegetarian food (I have been vegetarian since 1994).

@AndrewSmoot

4 жыл бұрын

Google's mishandling of the closed captions changes that; but, that's not Bill's fault.

@Cystus

4 жыл бұрын

I guess you missed the Dont judge others part of bible..

How I miss the Blue Collar Comedy Tour!! I was lucky enough to catch a show in Knoxville, Tennessee years ago, and it was absolutely awesome!! These guys are all great and Bill’s timing is genius!!!

He knows how to tell a funny story..even without explaining everything!

2:51 “He said "you'll be sedated" and I said "yes! I will!"” 😂 4:35 “it's like going to a restaurant and going "yeah I'll have the steak and lobster" And they go "Welp there's the kitchen 👉🏻, go cook it"” 🤣

@dr.johnzoidbergmd7165

3 жыл бұрын

You're just narrating what's happening in a less interesting way than the characters are presenting it

I’m almost speechless to say beyond hilarious and I feel, no pun intended for you. My father is a marine at 84 and would just say if you had to deal with it and he never finished a statement. I left his house almost crying

“I have a thread....hangin’ outta my wiener!” OMG!! I have never laughed so hard!!

@saragrant9749

Ай бұрын

The image of him attempting to pee with the thread hanging out is just too much 😂😂 his wife definitely had a mess to clean up!

@RobinPratt-sm2hn

6 күн бұрын

Ditto

It’s all so true and also funny what an incredible comedian absolutely love him him and the blue color comedy club need to get back together and get on the road!🤣🤣🤣🤩

I'm sitting here crying from laughing so hard! He's so damn funny!

@nancyneville8700

4 жыл бұрын

He is,along with Ron White...

When he said there are four things in life I was laughing so hard I was crying.👍😁😎

I've had kidney stones and they hurt like hell. My Dr. even told me he's had pregnant women say that giving birth wasn't as painful.

Oh man he's the best storyteller ever.

He will always be my favorite comedian

@jamesedwards2237

Жыл бұрын

Just saw his Retirement Tour show at Talking Stick Resort in Scottsdale Arizona Sunday night. May God bless him. He is an amazingly funny man!!

1:15 my son who is 11 now had a mole on his forehead removed when he was 18 months old. He was so sedated that he started to tell all the nurses "I love you". The nurses were almost in tears to see this cute kid telling them "I love you".

@Whatthefk189

3 жыл бұрын

When I had my teeth pulled at 16-17. I was on the loopy drugs and I told everyone I loved them. I told one nurse she deserved better. And I begged my mom for a chocolate milkshake.

A lot of comments from women on here that pretty much say the same thing: "I've had a kidney stone and I've given birth...I'd rather go through 5 more childbirths than go through another kidney stone."

@susanlbk

4 жыл бұрын

Um,I've had 5 kids and kidney stones . I'd rather have the stones, lol...

@kingdomcome180

3 жыл бұрын

Susan you sound like the kinda mother that even her own children wish the same thing as you. They would rather be your kidney stones than call you mom

@libbycampbell2557

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly!! I’ve had both, and delivering a child was much easier than passing my stone!!

@jackson5781

7 ай бұрын

Kidney stones I've had too, how I beat them is through apple cider vinegar and water, and I refused to take any pain meds or a needle cause my friend told me when he took the needle it affected his sex life. I said screw that!!

@jessicakane8399

6 ай бұрын

That's mostly because this thing called adrenaline exists. It does make a difference.

Hi Bill, I just want to say thank you for putting this on KZread. My dad has recently gone through the same pain and this helped him out and gave him a good laugh. I was wondering whether you could put the whole video up, including the part about your wife helping you remove the stent. I’d love to show that to dad. Take care and hope to see you in Australia some time 😊👍🏻

Bill, I’ve had two kidney stones and a baby all natural, and I rather be in labor!!!

@RedT...TheOriginal.NotANumber

4 жыл бұрын

You and me both.

@SamiLo2

4 жыл бұрын

Yep! I had a kidney stone, and I’ve been thru 43 hours of back labor. I’d take the labor again over the kidney stone.

@wysestone

4 жыл бұрын

Most women I know what have had both say the same thing. I wouldn't wish my first kidney stone on my worst enemy.

@Wastelander1972

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah. Women would definitely prefer labor to kidney stones.

@reginafallangie2867

4 жыл бұрын

Rachel Mathes, agreed sister!

Bill Envgvall is a comedic genius!!

Lmmfao!!! "I don't even sew!" 😂😂😂😂

@oldiesgeek454

4 жыл бұрын

If I was the Doctor, I would've replied: "Well now's your chance to learn". 😊

I’ve been a nurse for 41 years and I’m telling you I’m not pulling my own stint out.

ROFL Bill, you are a master at making real life hilarious!!!

@wesleymartensson7287

3 жыл бұрын

Hi dear 👋

I'm crying laughing and having a slight panic attack all at the same time thinking about this procedure.

I can relate.....When the Urologist pulled my stent, I thought he somehow was pulling my spinal cord out of my pee pee...

@jillanderson2596

4 жыл бұрын

And you are awake when they pull it out LOL!!!! My cousin has had one, my Dad had to have them every 6 weeks (bad prostate surgery, he had colon cancer....they think that had something to do with it) and then Dad had a “pee bag” as he called it. And we could SEE the stones!!!!!!! Personally, I just pass them. They figure I have them like Dad. LOL well, I know what they look like!!!!! I feel bad for guys!!!! I had a child almost 10lbs, 26”, shoulders wider then his head, NO epidural-I can handle little stones 😉 at least that’s the joke in the family LOL but I feel really bad for guys!!!!!

@Jordan-pd8ir

4 жыл бұрын

@@jillanderson2596 Men and women have the same size urethras. Kidney stones come out of urethras, children come out of vaginas.

@Crg_eli

4 жыл бұрын

duenge was it painful? because when he said he had to pull it out, I Damn near fainted, and felt so much pain I’m not even kidding!!

We all ❤️ you Bill! I need a knee replacement myself and I am trying to put it off as long as possible! I’m sorry to hear about all that happened to you, but I’m so glad you are feeling better and that you can make jokes about us and make us all 😂! You are such a gem! God Bless You!

Bill, MORE please. Thank you, Sir!

In my best Hank Hill, “Bobby, that’s called a narra urethra, not small urethra”.

Lol omg I'm dying here.. you are hilarious

They have to do the rest of the I have A Small What??? story Part 2. I know what happens and it's pretty damn funny!!! 🤣🤣🤣

@David_H__

4 жыл бұрын

Been a while since I heard it, but yes, we need part 2!

@oldiesgeek454

4 жыл бұрын

Does he use the term Pee Pee? I just love that word! 😊

@BackstreetsAngel7

4 жыл бұрын

Pleaseeee!!!!!!

@YourTattooedRebelGirl

4 жыл бұрын

All I have to say is poor Gail lmao!!!! 😁🤣

@YourTattooedRebelGirl

4 жыл бұрын

@@oldiesgeek454 Nope he said weener

My mother said she would take childbirth over a kidney stone any day! Then again she had a high pain tolerance and labor didn't bother her much. lol.

@TheGhostofMrArthurs

4 жыл бұрын

my wife said the same thing. Our first child ripped her to where the asshole and vagina was basically one giant gash, and this was 20 years ago. She had a kidney stone about 3 years ago and her exact words to this day are "I will fight any of these dumb bitches that thing childbirth is the most painful thing a woman can go through"

@annacribbs4142

4 жыл бұрын

My mema had told my daddy she rather have a BBY go through labor than to have a kidney stone. I've a multi gall stones at one time. So many till after they took my gall bladder out I had to be transferred to get the rest. I never wished that on no one....

@reginafallangie2867

4 жыл бұрын

Anna Cribbs, I’ve had gallstones (gallbladder ultimately removed), kidney stones, & child birth. The kidney stones were the worst.

This is the funniest story Bill Engvall has ever told hands down!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@bettycogswell9851

4 жыл бұрын

I loved the one where the doc gave him medical marijuana too....Hysterical...

@givehimtheglory7

4 жыл бұрын

@@bettycogswell9851 yeah!! That was hilarious too!!

@DivergentDroid

4 жыл бұрын

I rather kinda liked his two part Marijuana story bit better but you have to see them both for 14 minutes of Awesome.

@givehimtheglory7

4 жыл бұрын

@@DivergentDroid That's for sure! 😂

I just went through the entire kidney stone ordeal myself. Bill is extremely accurate about it. The worst pain I have ever endured was when the stent was removed.

@mattm7798

Жыл бұрын

They don't give you anything for that? What's the point of all these pain drugs when they won't let you use them! LOL

@Imagineitisraining

Жыл бұрын

@@mattm7798 I'm a woman and well know about that string. 😂. I waited until they blasted the stone and didn't have to remove it. At first, the doc said I could pull it out. Hell no.

“I don’t even sew” ahahahah

You're the best out there. I hope you'll be entertaining us for many years to come.

Being paralyzed, I have to see the urologist every year and I was able to laugh even harder.No pun intended. Bill is hysterical!

And all the doctors ever say is “you might experience slight discomfort”.

@billchambersmarquez2768

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah right!been there when they say that you know all Hell's gonna break loose! I've had 49 kidney stones! Bill

@dragondancer1814

2 жыл бұрын

HAH! Any time a doctor says that you’re going to be experiencing “discomfort,” you can count on whatever it is you’re going to be feeling to be the equivalent of passing 50 pounds of rusty fish hooks using an enema made from battery acid and ghost chili hot sauce!

Bless your heart, Bill; know exactly what you mean. Had the same experience you had. Small urethra and 8mm kidney stone, but my doc took the stent out. That wasn't fun either.

@billchambersmarquez2768

3 жыл бұрын

No kidding! Bill

@pnut3844able

2 жыл бұрын

I was asleep when they put the stent in. Not when they pulled out. Jesus christ.

Oh my god no never want a kidney stone. I'm so sorry you went through this

@oldiesgeek454

4 жыл бұрын

I had Gallstones about 10 years ago. They're no day at the park either.

@swampy6194

4 жыл бұрын

If the toilet bowl resonates pings when you pee....you might have kidney stones. Learnt that the hard way.

@swampy6194

4 жыл бұрын

@Andy Helms Damn right Andy....flavoured colored mineral water sent me to ER.

@swampy6194

4 жыл бұрын

@Andy Helms Prob my fault too, I was a gym jock and perhaps overdid the protein thingy...The worst part Andy....every heartbeat = extreme kidney pain and akin to the Hulk squeezing your balls.....It just doesn't let up without meds.

@tracieandthecrazyturtle477

4 жыл бұрын

You what at least after child birth you get a baby. After passing a kidney stone all you get is your Dr telling you the worst night mare ever ... Now sence you had kidney stones you can get them again. What the hell Dr !!

Having just had a Kidney Stone and Stent, I needed this.

Omg... been there, done that, etc. Something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

Thanks so much man... you made me laugh my ass off...😂 but there definitely needs to be a part 2... pretty please? Lol 😂

@wesleymartensson7287

3 жыл бұрын

Hello 👋 Dear.

That hurts just thinking about it.

Omfg... "Don't tell me you lost your wedding ring up there" I laughed so hard I woke everyone up in my building. Bahahahaha! Tears!

If you only would have had a fish hook! Oh, the money you'd save on... that other rod!

I always had a feelin Bill and Hank Hill were related

The comedians out of Texas are ALWAY hilarious! - Bless your .. heart )LOL(

@oldiesgeek454

4 жыл бұрын

Oh yeah, Texas got some funny Sumbitches I'll tell ya! 😊

I empathize with Bill so much, I’ve had those issues several times..

"I DONT EVEN SEW!" 🤣🤣🤣

bill engvall one of the best

Hope Riley you are SOOOOOO right!!🤣🤣🤣

Can’t wait to see him February 8th In Charles Town, WV. Got my tickets 🎫

Wonderful comedian Thank you 4 the smiles

Maybe the nurse was talking worse case scenario pain childbirth. Women who have experienced both kidney stones and childbirth say passing a stone is worse than childbirth. After all, the body is not designed to pass kidney stones, but it is made to birth a baby.

@seecanon5840

4 жыл бұрын

Mark Griffin .............the body passes or expels anything that it perceives as dangerous or useless. I had a kidney stone that was minuscule but the pain was worse than child birth.

@joywebster2678

9 ай бұрын

The Nurses mean the intensity of the pain is similar to contraction pain. Both involve smooth muscles in addition to the internal organs contracting. But when a man is laying there yelling he doesn't want the details of anatomy! Kidney stones hurt sooo much because all your back and abdominal muscles join in the spamming contractions of your ureter trying to pass "a basketball through a straw". All that contacting makes it harder to pass it. I have birthed 7 stones in my life, and in w023 I know three are laying quietly in my kidney waiting to attack! I've also been a Nurse for over 40yrs, and thought initially people were overracting to stones, till I had my first one!

I go to a urologist every year for 17 yrs to have stents changed. I was awake once. Underline, exclamation point!!! You give me darn good drugs and wake me when it's done. Thanks, I laughed my whatchamacallits off!

I will never eat while I'm watching u again I was laughing so hard I started choking on my toast I thought I was gonna see the light. U r sooo funny it feels so good to laugh

I had this very same conversation with my urologist. Talk about déjà vu. Lmfao 🤣

My dad got a kidney stone in the middle of ordering a coffee at Starbucks.. he ran to the bathroom and he cried his eyes out

@ericmathis7740

3 жыл бұрын

I passed a stone at work and they heard me yelling at the other end of the building 😭😭

I got dilated when I was hospitalized for gastroenteritis, and whoa I know what he means😂🤣😂

This was Bill’s best special ever

Hank hill, every body😂

He should "here's your sign" the doctor...lmao

Keep em coming bill! Much love from Houston, TX man.

He's not kidding about the dilaudid; about 4 years ago I was in the ER with a case of shingles and the pain was unlike anything I'd experienced. The doctor put the needle in the IV, injected the meds, and by the time she pulled the needle out, I was STONED. 🤪

I'm sure there was a few tampon jokes after that happened.

Amazing comedian!!

By far the funniest thing I’ve ever heard

Love Bill he's my favorite

Bill, you still got it. In fact, you're better now an I didn't think you could get more funky. Hv a blessed week🌷😂

🤣🤣🤣 omg he is hilarious! The weed bit is so so so good

He is sooooo funny. Love him.

Thanks again for all the laughs

So Bill Engvall is essentially Hank Hill.

One of my favorite moments was seeing Bill, Jeff, and Larry together. There was another guy, but forgot who it was. It was the guy that replaced Ron.

Wtf doc. What am I paying you for🤣 so true

Bill is like Hank Hill😂

Love this guy!

He was great in "Wish for Christmas".

You don’t need to sew Bill, it’s a fuse…😂

I love him and his demeanor. I miss his tv show.

Always outstanding, always!!!!

This sounds EXACTLY like what happened to me..several days in hospital until urethra stopped bleeding They did not use a laser, they put me out, into a water bath and sound waves to crush the stone.

Ol' Bill Rutherford Hill Engvall over here

Oh God, the stint. This takes me back

This guy is too hilarious !!!

Bill , you're dangerous ,I about choked on my milk an cookies 😂

Great timing!

Anyone else’s knees weak while listening to this 😂