When I was younger when I wanted someone and they didn’t want me, I thought “I must not be good enough”. Now I think, “isn’t it unfortunate they don’t see my value” 💓💗💓💗

@orlandoantoine1616

Жыл бұрын

Love u bro. Youre enough to me.. 🫶

@kaoshi_kutie

Жыл бұрын

This!!! ❤️❤️❤️

@coolbreeze5683

Жыл бұрын

Very true! The other person's perspective might be that they didn't think they were good enough for you either! Everyone needs to be confident in themselves and see their own value.

@txgirl-gu4ux

Жыл бұрын

I like that thinking! ❤

@GoldenHellGirl

Жыл бұрын

​@AliSand No, don't say that. 🥺 I'm sure you are the most valuable person to your kid(s)!

The person who is ment for you will spend time with you, even when your "first impression" was a disaster. You can make the best impression of the world, the one who is not ment for you will leave you nevertheless. Greatings from germany

@madamecurious

Жыл бұрын

Jo, da hast du Recht!!

@deborafleischmann

Жыл бұрын

👏👏👏 true! Beste Grüße aus Nürnberg

I obsess whenever I really like someone I haven’t even dated, while in the pursuing stage. Trying to improve in this area and not get fixated

@shanajennings2258

Жыл бұрын

Same!!!!

@jrrichard1977

Жыл бұрын

You’re not alone in this thought pattern. Good luck to you

One of the most important things that I have noticed while observing some of my friends dating behaviour is that there are a lot of people who use dating as a compensation for some emotional or relationship trauma or instability and they invest way too much energy too early. Make sure that you are in a good place mentally and emotionally before trying to date people.

@denise-valencia

Жыл бұрын

really interesting concept, any theories as to why they do this

@thehealingfairee

Жыл бұрын

​@@denise-valencia Look into anxious or fearful avoidant attachment styles. It's psychology

@shawnshazam1912

Жыл бұрын

@@denise-valencia I think it may be a way to compensate for the emotional turmoil or even depression that they may be experiencing, but when you try to date people while in a poor mental constitution you end up forming trauma bonds.

@unicornsarereal8484

Жыл бұрын

That is interesting but it is about your friends. What about you? How are you in relationships? Do or did you learn from your friends’ mistakes? Just asking because I am curious. We often see others’ behaviour… I know I often do 😂

@shawnshazam1912

Жыл бұрын

@@unicornsarereal8484 I would definitely say that I exhibit traits of an anxious attachment type, but it is something I am working on to overcome. But I am relatively open with my own problematic tendencies and I try to be transparent with my partners or people I am tring to date.

I had zero nerves when I was on anti anxiety medication back when I started dating my ex fiancée. After 3 years of seemingly perfect happiness I stopped taking the pills (with the help of my psychiatrist of course) and we broke up a year later. The relationship worked because I was completely detached and had zero emotional reactions to triggers. He even mentioned “you’re not the person I met” which was true… I was not myself. And the real me and him were never compatible 😢

@hgfw9295

Жыл бұрын

Wow

@LimeCoookie

Жыл бұрын

i have a different situation.. i am definitely still myself on my meds and still have reactions to triggers, but from REAL intuition triggers and less from made up anxious triggers. but, the guy i was with thought i would be a completely different person off of my meds and didn't like that, even though i am the same person:(

I turned rejection into a massive dub. I went from severely anxious and depressed to the most confident and calm I’ve ever been in my life. I’ve already gained 2lbs of muscle mass since I started working out the day I got rejected. 28lbs to go and I’m already on track to beat my goal 6 months early. Keep on keeping on!

Dating preference 1. Subscribed to Matthew Hussey 2. Alive and is around my age group *Mission Accomplished*

@MrVinc466

Жыл бұрын

You can't fool me Nishikata, I know you also want someone who teases you lovingly all the time 😄

I interview for jobs even if I'm only sorta interested in the position. I think of it as good practice. I feel much the same about dating.

This is talking about rejection sensitivity. Putting them on a pedestal ultimately means you care about being rejected by them.

Absolutely love the concept of "create not ruminate." I am someone who easily gets stuck ruminating and it puts me in an unhealthy mindset in life and my love life. Lately, though, I feel like I'm scratching the surface of creating more and I'm excited to keep moving forward with it. Creating has made my life brighter and better

9:20 great advice. Sometimes the silly thing you said or didn't say is simply you bounding off the other person's energy, they hv anxieties too. So much has to align to make the special connection many of us seek that are simply out of your control and your date's. You don't need to own all the responsibility here. Relax, be yourself, being perfect is boring, the right person will warm to you. The not-right person will pass -just as you do with others. Timing is everything.

Been doing this for years and it's changed everything.. Amazing advice.

nice little 10 seconds of reflection time in the beginning, cheers Jamerson :)

This was so so well timed for me! Thanks

Very useful. Thank you. Create versus consume. Don't consume the past through rumination. Create the present and the future from the lessons learned through the past. This is good for everything in life.

Great video, very helpful and real content!

this is the video I have been WAITING for!!!

So insightful

PERFECT! thank you, guys 😊

Make the mistake pay dividends! Perfection Matt on the perspective of this.

10:22 - 11:25 is great advice!

I loved that...Buddha was the love of my life and I ruined it...😂😂😂

What they didn't say was that sometimes YOU think you said a silly thing but the other person thinks it's brilliant or cute or funny!

Life changing information.

Love the anxiety/microscope analogy! Don't live there 😊

Need this on replay!

@juliaskagfjord6207

Жыл бұрын

Replay

@rosaliesullivan4367

Жыл бұрын

@@juliaskagfjord6207 thanks😊

i needed this RIGHT NOW as i was snooping in his newly following list 😂😂😂😂

@jimbobsconscience5159

Жыл бұрын

Girl you and me both 😅

@mint_soup9743

Жыл бұрын

Dont be giving me ideas! 😅

First!! 😊

Regarding the nervousness, I'm actually going to polittely disagree with you. The way I see it is, nerves are a sign that what you're doing is important to you. If you're with a new person and you're excited about them, it's ok to be vulnerable and show it. Depending on how you display it or play it off, you can use it to your advantage, and they can think you're cute. It's ok to be nervous, just try to relax and it's gonna be ok. This can also apply to a performance, a purchase, a deal, a date. Idk, just my thoughts on that. On a different note, how do you diferenceate chasing and conquest? I've watched a couple of videos, and it doesn't seem to be clear.

I want to be put on a pedestal. I want to be worshipped, I want someone to be amazed by me...... Is that so bad? Because I want to be amazed, I want to worship someone, I want to find someone who stuns me.

I watch your videos for years now and they are always on point. I just wonder why it's always women who has to adjust and solve and be the better one for themselves and also to choose the right people for them. These type of stories has been ongoing and these type of men are growing and growing and who we should avoid are becoming inevitable. Isn't there anyway for them to also learn from these videos and be mature to treat women fair and right 😅 i mean you are always helpful Matthew but why are there endless assholes in this world 😂

@psypulse8516

Жыл бұрын

Actually, I'm watching a lot of his videos and I'm a man, and I'm finding them really helpful, because despite the gender diversity, everybody as human beings we face similar or even same problems and fears.

make mistakes pay dividends pisses me off so much. i have looked at my texts inside and out and its just me. no matter what i do.. i get ghosted 100+ women. at some point analysis is useless. its better to accept there's something fundamentally wrong with you.

How to stop obsessing over an ex ? Period 😢

@amandayorke481

Жыл бұрын

I reckon, just forgive yourself if you notice you're obsessing, take a deep breath, & get on with life. I still tend to start getting obsessed over someone I parted from 13 years ago. Then I give a mental shrug & get on with life again.

@laurabm2548

Жыл бұрын

Let me know when you figure it out. It's a terrible place to be. I feel for you. Sorry.

@pegbuckner5074

Жыл бұрын

@@amandayorke481 it’s like waves. In and out. Like the tide sometimes.

@raniamohammed1437

Жыл бұрын

Its a very bad feeling thinking like you lost the one you wanted and can’t get over no matter seeing other people while he already forgot everything you had together

@raniamohammed1437

Жыл бұрын

@@amandayorke481 you mean i got still remember him and be sad about him and think like i have lost him the perfect person for the rest of my life?!13 years ?!!

That drug fix analogy is one I have been through for the last few weeks, how to deal with heartbreak when the "relationship" was just friends with benefits, I fell for him but he was always clear and intentional about everything he told me several times that he couldn't love me the way I wanted because he didn't want it, suddenly he runs into someone who he's had a thing before and they move in together in a few days, he says she makes him want to be a better man but then asks me to stay on the side because I'm the best BJ of his life 😢. I need help

@tara34952

Жыл бұрын

Wow. This guy sounds absolutely toxic! Why oh why would you treat yourself with such little respect? How could you possibly waste a second more of your one precious life pining over a man who is straight-up open with you that he's a cheater? A man who took advantage of you and your feelings for him in such a callous and deliberate way. He USED you and then discarded you the second somebody 'more interesting' crossed his path. And he's not even planning on being faithful to her from the start? Sorry, but he sounds like an absolute scum-bag. My advice to you is show yourself a bit of respect and care and don't waste another second being upset over such a horrible person. He is NOT worth your time!

@pescecanella4742

Жыл бұрын

What's happened since then?

Is there any youtube channels like this for men?

@staygold22

Жыл бұрын

This youtube channel is for people

@tom4115

Жыл бұрын

@@staygold22 the advice is for women

@tara34952

Жыл бұрын

Loads

@carmellahoney3599

8 ай бұрын

@@tom4115yeah but they're all misogynistic incels

If you think about it in a lifetime people have a lot of dates . You can’t possible date everyone !!!!