“You’re never alone with a phone… look at that no calls.” Story of my life lol

@Nickelodeon81

Жыл бұрын

"Everyone I know doesn't want to talk to me."

@wildkeith

10 ай бұрын

At least now no one would even notice you because they're all looking at their phones.

"Restaurant, you have to pretend you're infinitely wealthy for some reason" hahaha, it's true.

You are never alone with a phone. It is funny because it is true.

@goclbert

6 жыл бұрын

The joke aged into a different joke

@AqibA.C.

5 жыл бұрын

But at the same time, not at all true.

@fingmoron

5 жыл бұрын

More alone than ever with a phone.

@billt1954

5 жыл бұрын

@@fingmoron Well yes, but you can fool gullible people into thinking that your 'not' which brings great comfort, to some.

@sushrutgokhale3857

5 жыл бұрын

You always have zucc with you

"Obviously it's not really delicious like hot chocolate or coke.."

@ActivationComplete

7 жыл бұрын

Clearly AlphaMikeOmega hasn't had hot chocolate and crisps

@QuasiELVIS

5 жыл бұрын

Wine does tend to go with food a lot better that hot chocolate or coke.

@Chris66able

4 жыл бұрын

@Terror You can't really be that thick !

@quintoblanco8746

4 жыл бұрын

@Nunnha B Let's look at this logically and study the ancient technique of winemaking: Base material: beautiful fresh grapes The grapes get stamped by the feet of peasants The resulting mixture gets stored The things that make grapes sweet and delicious get fermented by yeast into ethanol and carbon dioxide The wine is stored for a longer time so the protein gets broken down The resulting thing contains derivatives of gallic acid (tannin) which makes it taste like leather The wine maker adds gelatin derived from boiled down animal carcasses to remove some of the tannin You might be on to something...

@basedbattledroid3507

3 жыл бұрын

I've never actually had coke before. But I bet it's way better than wine.

“The highest alcohol content per ml at the cheapest price, in this whole corner shop”

@QFIhawkman

3 жыл бұрын

Excellent! And perhaps another bottle of this barolo red wine drink that you recommend, in case the first doesn't rid me of my perishing thirst.

@Commanber

3 жыл бұрын

@@QFIhawkman That is the usual solution.

@persona1822

3 жыл бұрын

I don't need this apple banana and this copy of the ledger

'He's looking for someone more subservient on the internet' 😁

@Wally-H

5 жыл бұрын

That is a great line - made me giggle

@JH-su9vl

5 жыл бұрын

Johnson is one of the best characters and big suze is fucking hot. Would love to watch her taking johnsons bbc

@SheldonBeldon

5 жыл бұрын

Good lord Jim take it easy

@justicewarrior9187

5 жыл бұрын

Just tells that she's shit on bed..!

@TheMikenanners

5 жыл бұрын

‘What a sheeeeet’

"He's looking for someone more subservient on the internet" is one of the best lines in the series

@Colin_Lawlor_Audio

2 жыл бұрын

I prefer, "4 naan? That's ridiculous!"

@lachlanbrown409

2 жыл бұрын

Lame comment. Women want a man's protection then call men toxic. GTFO

@Colin_Lawlor_Audio

2 жыл бұрын

@@lachlanbrown409 who hurt you? Lol

@Sheen023

2 жыл бұрын

@@lachlanbrown409 awwww. 😆 . bruh. Why r u generalizing?

@Norsilca

2 жыл бұрын

@@lachlanbrown409 found the incel

When my partner and I buy nice wine in restaurants, we do sometimes say, "obviously it's not really delicious, like hot chocolate or coke".

@QuasiELVIS

5 жыл бұрын

Hot chocolate and steak might be a bit of a rough combination.

@jamma246

4 жыл бұрын

@jack Maher Nah, but when I head on down to that ole saloon, I always have a hog-killin' time with my pard'ner. Yee-haw.

@Dominian1

3 жыл бұрын

@@QuasiELVIS You gotta try milk steak with hot chocolate and jelly beans. Tell me if you puked, because I am not trying it first.

@QuasiELVIS

3 жыл бұрын

@@Dominian1 Or perhaps an egg, in this trying time?

@Dominian1

3 жыл бұрын

@@QuasiELVIS Aw thanks, all those blood capsules made me sick. Maybe an egg will BLURURUUUGGHHHHH

His face when he sees the price

Every date is expensive when you're paying

“Everyone i know doesn’t want to talk to me” damn that hits hard

"There's a fivers worth right there"

@jf3490

5 жыл бұрын

true fan You sound fun at parties

This show made me legit fall in love with Big Suze

@samtownend6744

8 жыл бұрын

I was the same with Dobbie

@myblueshades

8 жыл бұрын

+Nicolas Cataldo Can confirm legit unconditional Suze love.

@cybernautadventurer

7 жыл бұрын

Jez always gets the hot women. It's not fair!

@1funkyflyguy

7 жыл бұрын

Debbie's great, but she's no Big Suze!

@childofthesun32

7 жыл бұрын

I was totally into Dobbie, but Big Suze seems like such a fuckin' out of touch, delicate bitch nightmare.

Big Suze is an absolute stunner.

@tsarbomba01

3 жыл бұрын

Annoying though...

@sebbach3747

3 жыл бұрын

@@tsarbomba01 like most stunners

@onlinefool9931

2 жыл бұрын

@@tsarbomba01 big posho*

@lotte1521

2 жыл бұрын

@Old Skool Bodybuilding Routines bet you're a neckbeard virgin living in his mums house

@Littletime839

2 жыл бұрын

The actor is related to royalty

That subtle flinch when he saw the price

@Lousfw

3 ай бұрын

It’s almost like fear. Robert Webb is a fantastic actor

2:00 the best acting of a person tasting a wine too bitter for anyone else to comprehend, ever.

I can relate to this show more than I want to.

Jez was sure wrong about Iraq.

@andrewsmith74

7 жыл бұрын

That was obvious bullshit when he said it.

@goclbert

6 жыл бұрын

Combined with the phone joke that's 2 jokes in 2 minutes that aged like fine wine

@thedreamcapture2681

6 жыл бұрын

hey its not over till its over.

@goclbert

6 жыл бұрын

ytviewerLem998 Oh God you're right. All the dots are connecting in my head right now.

@WalterLiddy

5 жыл бұрын

Well that's the joke...

I can relate to both and Mark and Jeremy for all the wrong reasons it’s disturbing.

the writers of this are theeeeeeeeee most underrated writers ever

Suze is super gorgeous

@Mashburn007

5 жыл бұрын

I will remarry her anytime. Pray for me

@QuasiELVIS

5 жыл бұрын

She married someone related to the Queen so she's Lady Fredrick Windsor or something now.

@ushoys

4 жыл бұрын

She's a bit too fleshy for me.

@cartmanofsp

4 жыл бұрын

MrMarr4347 lovely hahahaha

@talk2s5061X

4 жыл бұрын

Mate serious

He should have asked for Mr Rashid's 2.99 bottle

@seadkolasinac7220

6 жыл бұрын

UnoriginallyInclined he should also ask him if he’s got anything cheaper

@KaleWB

4 жыл бұрын

oh that’s rough. miscalculated. dinner party.

@ronoccc

4 жыл бұрын

there be monsters

@michaelkobylko2969

3 жыл бұрын

Austerity cornflakes and Latvian feta?

@QuadMochaMatti

3 жыл бұрын

@@michaelkobylko2969 Brown rice and PopTarts, chamomile tea and economy vodka.

Look at that - no calls. Everyone I know doesn't want to talk to me hahaha

Can’t help wishing Jez had said: “Barolliant!” at the end there

These two (and their writers!) never failed us. :-)

Why does Johnson need to look on the internet when he already has Mark?

“There’s a fivers worth right there.” I do that all the time!

“Bereaved is better than stood up”

My alltime favourite show :)

@basedbattledroid3507

4 жыл бұрын

Love your videos on Bully

@xNeonhartx

3 жыл бұрын

Oh hey I wasn't expecting to see you here sweg lmao

@dynamitedog4949

3 жыл бұрын

SWEGTA who would hace thought to see you here.

@starsigngirl9789

3 жыл бұрын

Same xxx

@PippyPopsSelfHarmMonica

3 жыл бұрын

The bully man himself

"I'm paying I assume" LOL those subtle pathetic moments from Jez gets me everytime, his lines are probably the most overlooked by fans

@twisted_nether373

2 жыл бұрын

He's one of the two main characters, you really think fans even could overlook roughly 50% of the show?

@sebsebski2829

Жыл бұрын

there is nothing pathetic to ask that question in the age of equality

@HeatyFrog

9 ай бұрын

@@sebsebski2829 He invited her, it's pathetic

"………what is my news……."

"No calls, everyone I know doesn't want to talk to me" It does feel like that sometime

"For wine, *smooch*, brilliant!"

I had a mate do this to me...He helped me set up an art exhibition, i took him out for dinner- it was all like lobster thermidor & fizz! Think i ordered egg & chips.

@grogery1570

3 жыл бұрын

That's a twist on the Seinfeld episode where Jerry takes some one to dinner for giving him a coat. He buys some expensive seafood and the other guy says I just want the soup, and since that really isn't dinner he thinks they should do it again!!

Mark should have hit up those women smiling at him instead lol - the one on the right most seemed interested

@PointsofData

3 жыл бұрын

I mean pity is a kind of interest sure

It's so cute his phone is a phone. These days he could have been playing strategic RPGs, reading the Internet, heck for that matter hitting Tinder up.

@Prog4Prog

4 жыл бұрын

Mark creating a tinder profile under Jez’s supervision would be a great scene

@romyarmada9580

3 жыл бұрын

@@Prog4Prog Swipe right on them all Jeremy, on them all. That’s insane

"Obviously it's not really delicious like hot chocolate or coke." Thank you! Someone finally said it. Let's stop pretending alcoholic drinks taste good.

@rentalsnake6542

4 жыл бұрын

Idk mate, a nice wine with a juicy fillet steak is the tits.

@Rig0r_M0rtis

2 жыл бұрын

Beer is very refreshing tho. More than coke or hot chocolate

@fiarandompenaltygeneratorm5044

2 жыл бұрын

EVERYONE would be an alcoholic if hot chocolate or coke had alcohol in it.

@benjaminr8961

Жыл бұрын

I prefer a Moscow mule to coke or hot chocolate.

£45 seems like a bargain for fancy restaurant Wine in 2022

@giftedkid54

11 ай бұрын

You would be hard pressed to find a Barolo for under £100

@ddmozz

8 ай бұрын

@@giftedkid54lol seriously? that's what I pay monthly in rent in buenos aires.

45 quid?! I've just spent 45 quid on wine!

@maxclifford937

3 жыл бұрын

To be fair, to English people the £45 price isn't the issue. The fact you only get one bottle is.

The Northgate (the pub exterier) is on Southgate Rd in Islington, London. But it's called De Beovier Arms nowdays. Great boozer.

"Bereaved is better than stood up"

who cares about money when they're on a date with big suze?

It never happenned to me but at the beginning when Mark complains about the women looking at him I felt that

The bereaved remark is so cute

No calls, everyone I know doesn’t want to talk to me. Welcome to the grim reality that is most men’s lives.

"Better bereaved than stood-up" XD

Borolo being a high-tannin intense wine, is usually drunk after a meal, not as a "session tipple". Located among the Langhe hills, the Barolo zone is a collection of different mesoclimate, soil types, altitudes and expositions that can have a pronounced effect on the development of the nebbiolo grape and the resulting Barolo wine. Within the Barolo zone there are two major soil types separated by the Alba-Barolo road. Within the communes of Serralunga d'Alba and Monforte d'Alba is a compact, sandstone-based soil dating from the Helvetian epoch. In the Barolo and La Morra zone, the soils are similar to those found in the Barbaresco zone, dating from the Tortonian period, being composed of calcareous marl that is more compact and fertile.

@cmwriter93

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds delicious. Not as delicious as hot chocolate or coke, but for wine...?

@Svoorhout85

3 жыл бұрын

This is something Mark would memorize as an anecdote. Jez would if his IQ was high enough to be able to memorize it.

@andyharpist2938

2 жыл бұрын

@@Svoorhout85 Yes. He would be quietly pleased about his prior knowledge of this interesting and complex variety, though too shy to inform his companion that it is usually an after-dinner wine... notwithstanding an expensive one nevertheless.

“He’s looking for someone more subservient on the internet.” 😂

Hahaha, I love Jez!

"You're never alone with a phone" has only got more and more true

I keep remembering that Big Suz is a member of the Royal Family

@Momofan69

2 жыл бұрын

She's not, her actress is.

0:07 hahahahahaha I love how he misread that smile. xD

@euan1234

5 жыл бұрын

never noticed that before! i actually thought they WERE 'pitying smiles', until you see the lady on the right. Good spot!

@bouncycastles1214

5 жыл бұрын

@@euan1234 Was she eyeing him up?

@euan1234

5 жыл бұрын

@@bouncycastles1214 I think so. Two are giving him the 'pity smiles', but the third one is raising her eyebrows and smiling normally towards him. And even (quickly) looks up and down at him

@korosuke1788

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah. One of them is interested and the other two are trying to convince her not to talk to him.

Big Suze dropped Johnson quick when he lost his job.

everyone i know doesnt want to talk to me either

I remember from my youth that my first wine in Poland costed around 1 pound for 0,7 liter bottle.

@qwadratix

4 жыл бұрын

My first pint of beer cost me 1 shilling and six pence.

@arturczerwinski2616

4 жыл бұрын

Just to clarify, it wasn't really a wine. It was a product where they mixed pure alcohol with water and some colour and flavour additives. It was absolutely obnoxious.

@qwadratix

2 жыл бұрын

@Smithy18 Not far off. IIRC war rationing ended in 1954 or thereabouts. I guess I bought my first beer 1965 (ish) with the money I made helping a local pig-farmer. By then, food was not too bad. It was pretty healthy by today's standard. Plenty of meat and fresh vegetables.

Jez reminds me of George Costanza here, complaining about bringing wine to a dinner party, and that Pepsi is so much better...

@slados1

5 жыл бұрын

Chocolate babka

My favorite episode

And now she’s royalty....

Nice pair.

Ah, Nokias. I miss them so much.

“New labour”! 🤣🤣 this is old, thank god!

Well his hunch was way off wasn't it!

sounds like my description of wine. the best wine ive drank was new wine that someone had just made and it hadnt gotten the bitter "wine" taste yet. or dandelion wine which was great and not sure it would really be considered a wine

@lesleyd9969

5 жыл бұрын

Sure, dandelion wine still counts as wine. You can even make wine with nettles.

@rentalsnake6542

4 жыл бұрын

@@lesleyd9969 who meeds a vineyard when I've got loads of nettles in my garden eh?

Barolo: marketed by The Soprano's. Rightfully so.

rip peep

1:56 that remember me Julius - Chris' dad.

Bigsuze would be worth a mortgage

45 pounds to get big Suzie tipsy, deal!

Big Suze is so very very pretty

"There it is! Oh, shit! No! Forty-five quid... I've just spent forty-five quid on wine!"

"Maybe she's dead" xD

Laughter helps 🤣😂🙂

Big Suze is such a snack.

Obviously it's not really delicious like hot chocolate or coke, but for wine... brilliant.

Look before you order!

Ah £45, the good old days.

Now I know what a quid is! After wondering about it for at least 50 years.

I'm surprised his phone wallpaper isn't of a beige carpet...

I find that Hardys VR for £5 is very good

Hahaha! Barolo is ridiculously expensive

Bereaved is better than stood up. - David Mitchell 😂

@comanchio1976

4 жыл бұрын

*Mark Corrigan

Big Suze is Claudia Winkleman's half sister and is married to Prince Michael of Kent's son, Lord Freddie Windsor.

@krashd

5 жыл бұрын

She's also in some American shite, I think I saw her in Two and a half big bangs or something.

@iamphoenix6310

5 жыл бұрын

@@krashd yeh shes regular on Ashton Kutcher series

There's a fiver's worth right there - mad me splutter out loud

I had that Nokia.

They sell it in Lidl now 😂

😍 big suze

Should have complained the wine turned after the first sip like Jeff tried in Rules of Engagement :3

''My news... I have chlamydia'' :D

Jeremy's hunch was wrong lol

His hunch was wrong

0:58 Jez wasn't far wrong.

The story of my life

Transferable tax allowance was abolished in 1990, six days before I got married.

I always had a little crush on Big Suze

Just noticed but the 'pitying smiles' looked more like 'interested smiles'. If didn't act weird, Mark probably could've joined them.

Lost it when he said “look at these dicks” 😂

Just for info it's series 5 episode 1 called "Burgling"

she Worth it!!!

Subservient? This programme just got interesting.

Oh shit NO! 45 QUID?!?!?! I'VE JUST SPENT 45 QUID ON WINE!