"I have always wanted to do this. It's been my dream since...lunch" 😂 That hits the nail so hard on the head.

@jacquelineshukla919

4 жыл бұрын

I agree! I loved that quote too

@tiggerjimbo1275

4 жыл бұрын

I'm between social and sexual somewhere. Depends. I'm doing online pub quiz evenings in this lockdown, instead of travel.

@erican9961

4 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@amandah3619

3 жыл бұрын

That one rang sooooo loudly!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

@DanaFusco12

3 жыл бұрын

I was driving and laughed so damn hard....

25:17 "Sevens are evaders. They evade authority, they evade responsibilities, they evade duty--" Me: Hehe. Doody. "-- they evade with humour--" Me: ...Hey wait

@jfish032

3 жыл бұрын

🤣 ugh.. so painfully true

@nurbul5487

3 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣 they made me laugh, didn´t realize it at first lmai

@magnoliasweetie

2 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂

@omokok1877

Жыл бұрын

Nice

@jenk8206

Жыл бұрын

Literally got kicked out of class in the 3rd grade because I overheard the mean teacher we all hated was on recess “duty” and I couldn’t stop laughing 💩

"It's been my dream since lunch." That was good.

@patriciafernandez6690

3 жыл бұрын

HAH Yesss!!

@amandah3619

3 жыл бұрын

That phrase sums up my life

@Berrith

3 жыл бұрын

OMG YES 😆😆😆

@sharonapersona2518

3 жыл бұрын

I laughed at that too 😂

Thank you. It takes a lot of courage to admit this to oneself for a seven. You are an example for all the sevens out there, and this will help the ones who love them.

29:58 social 7 41:10 sexual 7

@meeg9115

Жыл бұрын

tysm!

@_linlin_

Жыл бұрын

Life saver, I can't really watch the entirety of his vids

@rupiik

Жыл бұрын

you are chad

@60sbabydoll777

Жыл бұрын

THANK YOU SO MUCH THERES NO WAY I COULD WATCH ALL THIS WITHOUT ZONING OUT FR

The fact that this is almost an hour long 🧐 it's for 7s!! LOL kudos to all the 7s who actually say through all this 😂 my bfs a 7 and it would be a gd MIRACLE if he would.

@codygillock1224

3 жыл бұрын

Watching on 2x speed

@filipnagy3535

3 жыл бұрын

7 minutes in and I'm about to leave

@misovejasescuchanmivoz

3 жыл бұрын

I´m a 5 and I´ve watched all enneagram types one hour long videos, and still watching xD My cousin is one of my best friends and he is a 7, I never understood him until today, I was not able to do so, at all, we are too different, but now I understand, but I know that if I give this video to him he won´t watch it lol

@jfish032

3 жыл бұрын

@@misovejasescuchanmivoz LMAO, unless he's a reeeally healthy 7. I'm a 2 so I get super passionate about certain topics for very emotional relational reasons and become like a 5 about soaking in the facts like a vacuum 😃

@misovejasescuchanmivoz

3 жыл бұрын

@@jfish032 It is incredible indeed. You are a people person, I am too as I am a social 5 but I am usually alone xD I´ve been alone for so long, I am alone right now, I live alone with my cat. I´m in good shape and I am handsome but alone due to my personality, I go to the gym and people don´t talk to me and I don´t know how to do it myself xD, now that I know I´m just different I am working to be a healthy 5.

I was struggling to understand whether I was a 2 or a 7 because I had equal amounts of traits from both types. It is such an apocalypse for me to understand that I am the social type of 7 which explains why I am so willing to help ohers and shed the light on their needs...... wow!!! You actually say that this type of 7 may look like a 2 or a 1. It now makes sense for me. It is so enlightening!!! I am grateful. Thank you so much!

@PB-fx6mw

2 жыл бұрын

Same here, i was like 7?2?5?i

@mindyvalle6595

2 жыл бұрын

same for meee! sometimes I feel I'm type 1, 5,7 . not 2 anymore because one of my bfs is type 2 and I can see the difference now. she needs to help people even they don't need her help, in my case I would love to help someone who asked for. I guess I can't be a type 1 bc is hard for me finishing my projects, but I really love to organize my house clean everything and push my kids to do better. I'm kind of shy sometimes so I thought I could be a type 5, also because I like to read and search a lot of new things and when I focused and can go deep. but most of the times a prefer to know about a lot of things instead of going deep and master on a certain topic. hope this videos of 7s help me to find my real enneagram type 🙏

@yoniversum9416

Жыл бұрын

you have a tritype, so 7 AND 2 is possible.

@user-dk7zh5qx1c

4 ай бұрын

As a 7, I listened to this ( only parts as a time - c’mon you know why) while playing Mario Kart 🚗 Lol

This is BRUTAL but so necessary to hear

LOL thats so funny, I literally opened up a food truck on whim and am always networking and chasing after the things I want. Thanks, I love this video

@JesseMiles

2 жыл бұрын

same

@sunnynotblind4158

2 жыл бұрын

Funny , my 7 mom went thru a “I want to open a food truck” phase. It’s gone now😆

Never felt so called out 😂 Great video! "They don't enjoy the destination, they are enjoying the looking forward to the destination" finally someone put it in words!

I have subrscribed because you have literally hit my enneagram type on the head. I am appreciative of this perspective from another Christian.

Great video! Thank you. I am 7; hard to say what subtype as none is 100%. It rather feels like I can switch between them depending on problem or life situation or as a result of personal growth. I feel like 7 with 50% sexual, 30% social and 20% life preservation as I can relate to all 3 subtypes at the same time but one take over the others from time to time.

@rayna7055

4 жыл бұрын

I'm late but, if you haven't done so already I suggest you look into function stacks. Sounds like you're an sx/so with sp blind, but just decently developed sp

All I can say is thank goodness for Jesus bc I would be a straight monster.

@elitecoaching4927

3 жыл бұрын

I feel you so much on this💝

@kathrynroper3941

3 жыл бұрын

Wow you said it! Shout out to Jesus Christ!

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

Yes oh my God! I cant help but live by my foundational belief in Jesus Christ

ive got a social-self preserving 7w6 for a daughter. and im a self preserving-social 3w4. ive watched a bunch of your videos, and I just want to say thank you for putting this information out here into the world wide web. youve helped me so much not only in figuring out my own imbalances, but in seeing where she's been suffering. youve helped me improve and calm down my daughter and i's relationship. just thank you so much 🙏🙏🙏

ROSE COLORED GLASSES! I feel attacked 😂 I am such a sexual 7, holy cow! I feel like I have a lot of social 7 in me, too. This video helped me understand myself so much better.

@Stoffendous

3 жыл бұрын

You're very sexual Jerrica.

@YEDxYED

3 жыл бұрын

@@Stoffendous now that profile pic of her looks very young and that makes your response frighten me 😂

@Stoffendous

2 жыл бұрын

@@YEDxYED Hah! That was the plan!

Gluttony: you just described my relationship with brie!

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

whats brie

@maxinebrigue3059

3 жыл бұрын

Cheese

I know that I am not supposed to decide what type someone else has but this video made me realize that my husband is a 7. My older son is clearly a 7 but my husband doesn't fit the stereotype of a 7. Your detailed explanation of the types of 7s helped me to see him more clearly. If you hadn't guessed it by my opening sentence, I am a 1. My husband of nearly 35 years really helps me to get to the "orchard on the hill" because he is a 7. He makes me very happy and he encourages me to laugh at myself, which I really need to do in order to stay healthy as a 1. Thanks for doing this series!

@frappalina

3 жыл бұрын

Good for you! We need more men to help us climb the steep hill to the orchard

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

woop woop im like your husband! glad he makes you happy cant wait to treat my wife with encouragement in all that she does

Enthusiasm! Passionate! Idealistic! "Like you discovered the Enneagram and want to make KZread videos to share with the world...wouldn't it be a better place if everyone understood it!..." ahm, yeah. That describes me sooo well. LOL! I almost demand that people learn this stuff with my shear excitement over the subject! Social 7 w 6 here...

@trevawhitmoyer682

2 жыл бұрын

I’m here because a seven talked me into taking the Enneagram test !😆

I love your channel! Thnx for all the content, helps me understand myself better so I can break those bad habits of "leaving our families behind" that 7's tend to do. Meditation and sitting STILL and not doing is helping me alot.

I'll probably say I hate you under the 5 video, so now I'm saying I absolutely adore you. I love how it's really in-depth but also kept fully in the real-life mode. I mostly use Enneagram to build more realistic fictional characters, so this is exactly what I needed.

Thank you for this, Dr. Tom. When you discussed the social 7, with your personal transparency, I felt like you were reading my thoughts. Spot on. Interesting though, during my 40's (and actively drinking), I feel I was more the sexual type. Sobriety has been a blessing in so many ways! From learning acceptance, staying present, facing the damage I caused, and focusing on gratitude, the tools from a 12 step program has made me a healthier version of me. I'm really enjoying learning from you. Next, to decide if I'm an 8 or 6 wing!

So glad you made this video, my daughter is a 7 and now understanding this information makes me feel like I understand my daughter so much better.

I'm a 5 and going more into depth into the types so I can create more realistic characters for some books I want to write. These have been so helpful!!! I've also managed to type two of my friends. One friend in particular I was convinced she was a 2 now I'm convinced she's a Social 7. Thank you!!!

These words and at 2x speed is my Type 7 ADHD brain on blast. “Are we there yet?” “Are we there yet?” “Are we there yet?” “MY WANTS ARE MY NEEDS.”

Please keep these 7 videos coming! SPOT ON and so insightful and challenging. Thank you!!!!

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Thank you! Will do!

I am a 7w8 sx and I work with sex offenders as a forensic therapist. I feel like this ability to move toward pain combined with my belief in total redemption and ability to reframe allows me to be able to sit with pain and darkness. However, the enneagram helped me immensely understand my work is to sit with pain, shadow, and reality.

I love the example you gave of the seven having 5 but wanting 10. Thank you so much for that

Beautifully summed up for another seven to hear to be present to the here .. happiness is in the here and now .. great podcast thank u .. I ve done the ennergram course many years ago and forgot just how insightful in nature it is about our whole self .. in owing my whole self in the present .. nurturing it for who I am thank u ❤

It’s like you can see right into my soul with these seven videos. Thanks Dr. Tom!

Amazing! I have not laughed so hard at something so true in a loooong time. "I have always wanted to do this. It's been my dream since...lunch" Omg, i resemble that remark....! 👍👑🏆🏅

Dr Tom You are spot on and a joy to listen to👍👍☺️

Thank you for your videos! They do help a lot if your a growing 7.

This really made things a lot clearer. My compliments.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Great to hear!

Been waiting for this one!

My daughter is a 7. Her default state is happy, but this has helped me see the other sides of her, and frame of thinking/motivation.

“Sample as much life as possible” yes. I live for all of the samples.

Long video but SO worth it! I can't tell you how many times I had to pause and just laugh at myself and the truths here... thank you, Dr. Tom!

@hannahferguson6383

3 жыл бұрын

I also want to point out that, as a 7, I was of course multi-tasking while watching this..

@montereyuke

3 жыл бұрын

@@hannahferguson6383 haha! Same here, the "problem" with KZread, is that it shows recommended videos just to the right! I noticed you also said it's a LONG video., another Seven Comment, like I would say :)

“It’s been my dream since lunch!”... Lolol! My God, this is truth! 🤣🤪 Watching your videos has been in some ways even more like looking in a mirror, than actually looking in my bathroom mirror, Sir. 👍🏻

This CHANNEL!!!!!! When I took the RHETI I came out as a 4 on top and a 7 second. When I watched this video on the subtypes I started to understand that perhaps why I came out as a 4 is because I am a sexual 7. My therapist helped me realize I am more of a 7 because I avoid my problems/feelings instead of relishing in them. I am a singer-songwriter who writes a lot of sad songs, but a lot of them have an optimistic spin.

I would love to see a video based on personal growth through your wing and/subtype!

Another great post. Thank you. I'm a Five who had a Seven as a close friend growing up, and this was both exhausting and painful to listen to. I wasn't sure I could finish it. I can so recognize the charisma and energy and fun of a Seven, but also the unending restlessness, self-centeredness, and long string of broken promises. I know it's great to be a Seven and keep the pedal to the metal hopping from one experience to the next, but do realize that it has a toll on the people around you. It might be hard to understand how just being a funloving, enthusiastic person can cause anyone else hardship, but I encourage you to listen to what Tom has to say. Every type has their own share of shortcomings--Fives definitely do--but I believe a lot of us are much more aware of them. The Seven seems to often be the least aware of them and can be shocked to learn that just being a neat and positive person could ever have a downside for their friends and family.

@sydneys1071

4 жыл бұрын

Brandon Barnes While I agree wholeheartedly with the message in the video about 7’s not realizing how selfish their actions can be (7 here and these vids have really opened my eyes to some of the consequences my actions have on others that I never considered before) I have to say that it is definitely not always “great being a 7 and putting the pedal to the metal”. Being a 7 can be extremely painful and exhausting, especially when we are confronted with really tough life circumstances. I really actually hate being a 7. Sure, when things are good I have a lot of fun and enjoy being so enthusiastic but the absolute inability to sit still with myself has taken a major toll.

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

@@sydneys1071 Relatable af! Only Jesus Christ can give me the peace of mind I seemingly can never accomplish on my own.

@TheCof6656

2 жыл бұрын

For me it's the other way around, which was why I identified as a 5 the last few months. I am thinking about others constantly and what my decisions and my words do "to" them. At some point you HAVE to ignore what it does to others because you'd go mad otherwise. I ask others if I annoy them and bother them, because ppl in my past told me multiple times that I AM ANNOYING. So I ask "Am I bothering you? / Am I annnoying?", they say it's cool usually (I also don't wanna ask that too often, that can be annoying, too). So the bumblebees in my butt are always humming, whether I let it out on the sunny side or I keep it inside the shadows in my head. You don't KNOW whether people "realize" stuff or not! We might very well recognize it but not knowing what to do about it. What else than feeling bad about being ourselves does your comment accomplish? You don't have one practical tipp for a 7, you just say "realize this", which is based on the assumption that we don't. But as said, you don't know that. Let's say, I did realize that, what am I supposed to do about it to make a 5 like you feel less exhausted? Try to reread what you wrote... there is 0 useful information in your comment, it just sounds like a complaint. And to be honest: What do you think would help in your case? Maybe it's a misunderstanding from my side, but I don't think that a person who is just being themselves can do too much - not without introducing constant worry about how others feel. Instead of telling 7s to "do realize it has a toll on other people" maybe we could tell you as the exhausted 5 friend to "learn to voice your opinion". Kinda hurts, right? Bc I don't know the full picture? Yeah, guess what! Same here... Sure, go ahead, tell others what to do or how not to be without providing helpful suggestions - but honestly, just speaking black and whitish (which is super hard for me lol): if they don't want to worry about others, that's YOUR problem, not the other person's. And you need to deal with it. Not the person who is just being themselves. You need to have proper boundaries, voice your opinion in a way that is helpful, not only butthurt, and stand up when you are exhausted instead of pushing it down until it frustrates you.

I was married to a self preserving 7. We were always moving or getting a different car. He was always changing jobs. Eventually, he decided he needed to change wives. Self preserving 7’s leave a lot of pain and destruction behind them....

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

Hey, being that myself, and in college, I have been stressing myself out so much that i cant even enjoy myself because I am afraid that my future job will lack the fulfillment that I am searching for. So I am so sorry you had to deal with that, because damn, I myself, a great great person when healthy, was kind of a mess over my major. Ive changed it 2 times and last week, Jesus and myself just came to the conclusion to stick with my major! I wanted 5 things but I only need 3 things to be happy. This major will give me those 3 things:)))) I also just went through a breakup with my first love, and I left quite a bit of pain behind on both sides:((( Any advice? Some things your husband needed to know or hear?

@crazeekids9744

3 жыл бұрын

@@lukec5729 my main piece of advice would be to try as best you can to have balance in your life. Type 7’s are so energetic and full of life, which is great, but can spin their life out of control of not kept in check. Life is fun, but life is also responsibility. Life is fulfillment, but life is also sometimes denial. I think it is also valuable for 7’s to have some people in their inner circle who are not like them, to help keep them grounded.

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

@@crazeekids9744 thank you!:)

@Squared_Table

7 ай бұрын

@@lukec5729you don’t sound like an sp dom at all

LAUGHING SO HARD... this is so me...I do have my own personal mafia. But those people in my life that I lean on enjoy it most of the time because it can be one hell of a fun exciting ride.

Every time I dream about the next project and put my heart into it and build up to it and then when i am there, well... I start to think about the next project 😃

@YEDxYED

3 жыл бұрын

The high of envisioning is way better than the high of actually going for it. That’s when reality hits and reality shows you that it ain’t gonna be so fun 😂

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

love that for you! Im going to be a project manager then hopefully a residential home builder! I would just love those kinds of highs!!!

Thanks. 7 social type resonate with me and this video help a lot. I admire you cor your work.

I know some 7s. Thank you for sharing! Great information!

I'm pretty sure I'm a social 7, and I experience it more as (major) fear of being seen as a bad person; as opposed to wanting to be seen as a good person. Of course I love praise and admiration, but if it comes at the cost of restricting myself, then the prospect of praise won't do much for me. Rather, it's the fear of being thought of negatively that motivates most of my altruistic actions

Lmao I'm a 7 and i always said Don't stop me now by queen is my anthem

I love the crib in the background.

@ashleyching3166

4 жыл бұрын

Symbolism at its finest 😳

Describing Ariel from the little mermaid, “She’s a glutton!” That made me laugh out loud

Thing that sucks about so 7... The gluttony leans into type 1 which is not where we wanna be

Almost too 7 to function 🤣

Maybe I'm not a once depressed 4, but the flipside of that, an sp/sx SUPER gullible 7!

@Embodied.bliss.somatics

2 жыл бұрын

Same for me !!

You mention the child, adolescent, adult ideas in this video, but it hasn't been mentioned every time, it seems like. Are those the same comparisons for each subtype regardless of the enneagram type, or does it vary based on the enneagram type associated with the subtype?

I love your site and have watched most. I am in relationship with a seven but I am an eight. I have a four pound Yorkie and am convinced he is an eight. Do you have an opinion on dogs? Does the enneagram app,y to dogs in your experience?

Took the longest time to realize I'm an Sp/So 7w8 "Only way to feel the noise is when it's gettin' loud"- Overkill by Mötörhead I get super absorbed in acquisition. So much that it separates me from people and leaves me empty...I wanna live in the present. Thanks for this

Hey Tom. I’m a social 7w6 (unless I’m a 1 which has been my dream since lunch)… I’m also a minister (MDiv, hoping for a DMin) and work as a hospital chaplain. I’m like just like you except that I’m a woman. I’ve always been thrown off of 7 because my job is literally to sit in the pain with people. Any thoughts on that? My spiritual director asked me if I was a 5 and I’m going to count that as a win.

Real question though: remind me again WHY it’s good to be in pain and suffering? Reality sucks a lot of the time, and if you can’t change a crappy situation, why even look at it? I really don’t get this. I feel like “because you will get to feel the entire breadth of human emotion” is always the answer ppl come up with as to why we should acknowledge reality, and that’s just not a good enough incentive for me. Pain hurts, and people are basically saying that you should feel pain so like, you can feel pain. That’s the reason? What am I missing?!

You are amazing. Thank you for this.

This man knows everything about me

I'm an enfp 7w6 sx/sp. I love my to do lists. What gives? Could it be I'm not a 7 then?

Does anyone know… can a social 7 be an introvert? Or ambivert?

In one paragraph, for a 7, subset dreamer/fantasy/childlike/wonderment, what would be your best advice on how to stay present? Thanks Doc! 56:49

This video killed me, I always said that New Years is my favorite holiday because of anticipation 😆 oooooof

Oh wow I am totally a social 7, but I'm not afraid of commitment. I use to be when I was a SP 7. I want connection and commitment. When I enter a relationship I know I am very serious with this person. That's probably my ENTJ way of being.

Wow, this video really shocked me. What I came to realise not too long ago was that both me and my father are both 7’s. I always knew he was a 7, even when I first started to get into the enneagram. Me on the other hand, I never thought I would be a 7, it was the type (along with 8) that I dismissed because I never “related” to anything about them. Also, I didn’t think much of me possibly being a 7 because I am nothing like my dad at all. But, upon researching further (which I barely do), I decided I was a 7 just like my dad. But, what made me realise is that my dad is a self-preservation 7w8 (sp/so), while I am a social 7w6 (so/sx). No wonder I couldn’t compare myself to him. This video was a real shocker. Now I can understand why my dad does things that he does.

Enjoying the channel! Fellow 7

Can anyone recommend how to figure out which stack you have? I thought for quite a while I was a sexual 7 but after watching this I related to pretty much everything he said, which is contradictory isn't it. I also can't figure out my blindspot, which of the three I'm lacking. It seems restricting to decide my dominant instinct but that is just me being a seven hehe.

Our 18 yr old son is a 7. Struggling to find a direction to go in this crazy world. Help!

The real question is, how do you as a seven shoot for your dreams, put in the hard work to attain what you believe is possible while maintaining an “idealistic view” of what is actually attainable, given your circumstances? How do you not confuse contentment with complacency?

@ES1077

4 жыл бұрын

Mamata Abdou an Enneagram expert I heard once said about 7’s”. They confuse boredom with peace.” The drive for more, more, more is exhausting to me 7w8. I pace myself now, focusing on serial completion rather than sheer variety, mastery rather than dabbling, and presence rather than the flight of imagination. I’ve grown a lot by being intentional and calming the lonely little girl inside with extreme soul care. :). Much love to all 7’s out there!

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

@@ES1077 confusing boredom with peace, I almost see them as the same thing:( Any advice. meditating is just about impossible for me

Thanks for your Time and the knowledge ! Yummy ! Where is the dessert ?

I am so stuck between an sx7 and sp2 :(

I'm starting to understand others' annoyance with me my entire life. Took me years to make a system that keeps up with all the appointments I make, and I still screw it up sometimes. Wouldn't make lists until recently either, but my life is so busy and it became imperative I not drop so many balls so often. Funny how kids become your reason for growing up and getting off the playground yourself 🤪

You’re a good guy, doc. 👍👍👍👍👍🤗🤗🤗🤗🥳🥳😂😂

So the social dreamer 7 is a narcissist person?

I was married for 30 years to a 7sp and it was a very difficult relationship. The way you describe 7w8 sp feels pretty accurate. Despite my desire to self reflect or take accountability for my own contributions to the difficulties, I still feel confused about my responsibility in the matter. (I'm 9w1 sx, INFP).

@elitecoaching4927

3 жыл бұрын

I was married to a 9w1, INFP, sx....I left after he quit his job (right after marriage) and didn’t do anything for 2 years. His work ethic and “sloth” like self-centeredness was the reason ended. However, we are still good friends, I just need someone who is fun, strong, and makes my $ better not worse.

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

@@elitecoaching4927 I fell in love with a 9 (my first love) and we just got out of a 7 month relationship (2 weeks ago). I loved her before I truly knew her. I literally dont like her personality type at ALL (the sloth like work ethic AND self-centerdness was unattractive). Opposites and nothing in common. I fell in love with her heart, soul, and mind. Not her personality truly

@lukec5729

3 жыл бұрын

@@elitecoaching4927 Also, I really really liked her and I just know that was a hard two years and continually painful relationship to think about. We are both looking for the same kinda person now (unless... nice lol) :)). She left me with sexual insecurities which really sucks because I never had them before. I am not too sure whether its just guilt or confidence or a mix. I'm only saying that last part beacuse earlier, I read your comment about being a sexual therapist of a sort.

19:10 - 19:17 wow I just realized that my little brother is this subtype of a 7 and I always thought I was insane for thinking that I shouldn’t have to put up with his nonsense either. Saying this as a type 9. Because often the self rationalizing just becomes a bit ridiculous and consequently manipulative.

I’m a sexual 7 but I’m not like you described us.. I think to be pretty realist and I don’t feel the need to see things amazing when they aren’t. I’m a 7w8 so maybe that’s why.. I’m honest with myself if something is negative is negative.. 😊 maybe I’m an atypical seven for this but I don’t think it would keep me safe in the world to see everything bright when it’s not.. it’s better to face the reality to solve the problems 😁 This is not an absolute of course

I got to section where you spoke of social seven and enneagram. Starting KZread and just started laughing. I had just stopped video and shared with my friend (also 7). I’ve gotten all I know Wisdom of Ages book. I’m totally into enneagram right Now. I do this all the time. Get into something. Myers Briggs, Edgar Cayce, Abraham Hicks learn all about. Drive everyone I know nuts about it then.....on to something else.

It's really interesting that I'm a so/sp 5, whenever i stressed, i go to sx 7, constantly idealize about perfect reality despite raw data from world, like a 4.

the self-preservation 7 reminded me sooo much of Jordan Belfort from wolf of wall street

36:55 Ouch! As a life coach, this one stung. I buy all sorts of books and trainings for this very reason.

I'm infj-a also a 7, with age thankfully I had developed myself n my 7 weak spots .. Now I enjoy life but n a settle way. And I know how to focus n a task finish it and then move to another one ... without the always be running.

Hi Doc, I love your videos. But I'm kinda confused - because the SO 7 description kinda looks either like a 1 or a 2 - because of the aspect of "finding pleasure in being seen by others as a good person". But how do you tell them apart from a true 1 or 2? How are those differences manifested in a way that we can easily tell that the person is a 7, and not a 1 or a 2? Would greatly appreciate a reply.

@Elemenohpea440

3 жыл бұрын

I am a SO 7 and can look very much like a 2 at times and I have a very strong moral compass like a 1. For me, the moral compass is an external necessity to keep me from being a hedonistic, immoral person. I know that I am not capable of controlling myself and am incredibly weak in the flesh, and this compass keeps me on track. So, in a sense, I am a very “rigid” person, morally, and hold myself to high account. I am Catholic by the way, and follow all of the laws of the Catholic Church. I haven’t disobeyed the Church since I joined 10 years ago. I follow the rules to a “T”. That being said, unlike 1s, I don’t tend to expect other people to act in a certain way and am actually very non judgmental. I can see how people fall and am quite forgiving. People of all walks of life seem to be comfortable in my presence, even if they know I’m a devout Catholic. People don’t seem to be afraid that I’ll judge them or will be offended if they say something against the Church. 1s on the other hand tend to expect everyone to adhere to their standards, and can be very judgmental or at least can make people feel judged. So, I have a moral code, but don’t expect other people to follow it. You’d probably be surprise at how conservative my religious beliefs are because I’m so fun loving and seem like such a free spirit. As far as looking like a 2, I am also very willing to help people and be a shoulder to cry on, but I don’t expect other people to meet my needs in that way. I feel like 2’s give and give and give and are bitterly disappointed when people don’t reciprocate. I give because it makes me happy and relieves boredom. Don’t get me wrong, I love my close friends and family and would die for them, but other people, I mostly help out of sense of duty or the adrenaline rush of being kind. It makes me feel good, and I don’t care if they reciprocate or even love me for it. I do, however, get annoyed when they don’t show gratitude towards me. I don’t need emotional support from them, but I do need a “I couldn’t have done this without you” acknowledgement. As a 7, I sometimes feel that my kindness, contributions and feelings are overlooked because I seem to have unlimited reserves. Because I am loathe to say no to things out of a fear of having my options limited, I sometimes feel put upon, especially if someone else’s needs are taking my attention away from a project or interest I have. Still, I never want reciprocation or tit for tat, I just want a simple recognition. 2s on the other hand, give in order to be loved. In fact, 2s think the only way to receive love is to do for others. They can’t seem to see their own self worth without sacrificing for other people. They have a deep sense of shame and mitigate it through altruism. By contrast, as a 7, I’m not altruistic and hardly ever experience shame. I just want to feel good and helping people, making them happy and bringing them joy gives me great pleasure. I love to be able to give people a break from their problems and distract them from their pain, even if only for a short moment.

@thomasarce

3 жыл бұрын

@@Elemenohpea440 Thank you so much! I appreciate how detailed your descriptions are. These definitely help shed some light on some of my confusions. I will now be able to easier understand my girlfriend - who I've been unsure for quite some time of whether she's a 7w6 or a 1w2. We both study the enneagram, and she insists that she's a 7w6, though I am a little suspicious because I don't see enough "crazy hedonistic behavior" in her, although she might be a bit "motivated" by material things and pleasures. She is quite rigid in her morals as well, and has strong foundation in faith. She tends to set expectations of people, and gets quite upset if they fall short of those expectations. All I pray for if it happens that she's actually a 1w2, and she lives her life being guided by the idea that she's a 7w6 - is that this would be healthy for her because she would be moving into her integration number.

@elitecoaching4927

3 жыл бұрын

Your girlfriend may have 7w8 and the 8 goes to two when they are healthy. I am a 7sx w8 and on one day I might look like a 2 but if I am rigid like a 1 it’s usually because I have to be to not self-destruct

@thomasarce

3 жыл бұрын

@@elitecoaching4927 Thank you so much! That makes perfect sense. Though over these past few weeks, I've been more convinced that she's more 7w6, because she seems lacking in aggression. I think she uses the 1 as a counterbalance to keep herself from self-destructing too, because she had experienced that before and she is scared of what happened to her and she never wants that to happen ever again. The "rules" she sets upon herself are actually self-imposed and she set them up consciously, according to her. And she sometimes will feel "trapped" by these self-imposed rules that she herself set up. I don't think I've ever met a 1, so I wouldn't know if they "consciously set up self-imposed rules", or do they just naturally have such rules in their head (or gut?) - which is why they sort of "feel sick in the stomach" whenever those rules are violated. And yes I think my girlfriend does not quite demonstrate as much 2 as I initially thought, because her way of "helping" is more about discussing and offering advice about subjects that she deeply enjoy, and not so much about "giving" or "helping" for helping's sake. I've noticed that she only helps when it involves subject matters that are stimulating for her, and not just "anything under the sun" like a 2 would typically do.

SP 7s, please don't become a parent 😭

My wife describes being with me ( A type 7) as a wind up toy, very loud and fun for a bit and then falls over and everything stops (when i get sad/depressed).

Thank you so much. Now I understand I am a 7w8 and that is why that sometimes I thought I was an 8! Think to act and then feel in a bold and direct way. My face 😄

@twlahue

10 ай бұрын

Wonderful!

I'm a 5... I'm just here for the comments. Haha.. lots of enthusiasm in one place.

Oh, ouch! I love it, but wow, that smarts! For years, I thought I was a 9w8. Just recently I decided to actually look into 7 a bit more deeply and this is exactly me. (I dismissed any 7 results as just coming from my ADHD, and I always got 7, 9 and 2 as test results. I was clearly not a 2, as while I want people to do well, I don't love doing things for people and only do it if it's necessary or if it's expected/required. And why would I be a 7, I'm responsible and care about others! Clearly a 9, I like harmony, I like people to get along. lol) 7w6, social here! I got married young and have a pack of kids, but have a sense of being trapped and claustrophobic when my husband references growing old in the house we now live in.

thankk you soo much for this

I thought I was a Sx w8 for years... This video convinced me I'm a Sp 😂 Being in fifty places at once is my superpower

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Awesome.

Hi I thinki I am a 7 social but I love travelling and adventure..I am confused between social or sexual..I love making reality better..I am disciplined as a 1 and care about others as a 2

I get your point but I went with out my whole life when you put others before yourself you become selfish. ❤ and love yourself

Thank you so much for this video.

@twlahue

3 жыл бұрын

You are so welcome!

@trustinvestingeuropa2764

3 жыл бұрын

@@twlahue I had always thought I was a 7 with an 8 wing. Thanks to your video, I now Know myself a little better. I have a 6 wing as well. I have been studying the eneagram for 5 years and your videos are some of the best ones I have ever seen. I am so grateful. God bless you and thank you so much!

There’s is so much insight in your videos, but again I think you are confusing or mixing levels of health with subtype. Each subtype can be healthy and mature and each subtype can be unhealthy and immature.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

You are probably correct. Thanks.

@mad45678

4 жыл бұрын

absolutely correct - I am a social, and I stay a social as my subtype; no subtype is "healthier" or more balanced due to their subtype; we are healthy or unbalanced due to the usual: self-care, conscious awareness - therapy if needed, intimate connections, etc

Wow ... Your approach is very different from others I've seen: self-preservation is usually more like 1; social like 7; sexual like 8. For me the most childish 7 is the social one. ;-)

@thesevenkingswelove9554

2 жыл бұрын

How is social 7 the most childish one though..? Social 7s spend most of their time away from glutonny trying to be as kind as possible. If not 1 then social 7s are like 2s

@raulsanz7120

2 жыл бұрын

@@thesevenkingswelove9554 Search for "peter pan syndrome"; you'll understand more about "how". Yes, social 7s are similar to 2s, but from different motives

Sp 7s seem fun but i dont think they would be reliable friends. I would be scared they would leave me for someone else all the time

Is Jack Skellington a 7w6 or 7w8?

@madisonnew7396

3 жыл бұрын

7w6

Omg! I am a sexual 7! Idealist, dreamer, gullible living in the world as I see it :)

@mybealoved

Жыл бұрын

We are the same!

My bf is a SP, his mom and me feels like the best part of the meal is eaten by others and we are just eating scraps and leftovers. Worst part is the' others' in this case can be complete strangers and unsavoury characters in the community. If I didn't learn the enneagram, I would have given up on him long ago.

@UrbanArtCentral

3 жыл бұрын

U described sp as an adolescent, so as an adult and as a child, doors that mean so is a higher state, sx is a lower state and these 3 states are on either a progression.or regression path? Is that p plausible?