Everyone (and their dog) should be watching Professor Vaknin nowadays.

@breemorrison901

14 күн бұрын

Unless their dog is a Narcissist...😂

@rabinraj15

14 күн бұрын

​@@breemorrison901 😂😂😂

@abigailmcewan

13 күн бұрын

I agree 😊

@goofyahhh254

9 күн бұрын

That should hit the spot for Mr vaknins narc side 😂

@Daniel-nb3kk

7 күн бұрын

​@@goofyahhh254Absolutely!

Thank Prof Dr Vaknin for poignantly unpacking “no good deed goes unpunished”, you never disappoint.

I've noticed that some determined and resilient people occasionally use drugs to quickly and reliably gain pleasure (in other words, they party hard) and then continue their difficult and lengthy work on implementing plans. I've always wondered how they don't become addicted. In light of this, it seems that in addition to determination and resilience, they simply have very good impulse control? Now that I think about it, they might all be a bit psychopathic as well :)

Another great piece. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush! Now where are did I put those marshmallows...? Oh, they're all gone.

It seems true that even those who declare themselves to be optimists are waylaid by a deeper, very early formation of a distrustful world view, due to parental abuse, and so they remain uncommitted to long-term, delayed-gratification goals because they distrust the world, but, perhaps more importantly, also see themselves unworthy and incapable.

Sam sang for us 😊

Beautiful singing voice, sir!

Definitely another amazing video! one can also use it to reflect upon our own life

This is very helpful. Is there some content where you adress "silent social contracts" ? How to learn to navigate them, how to resist them, etc

Thank you so much Dear Sam Vaknin❤

Dr. Vanknin, this is very enlightening video. I've been ignorant and in denile for too many years. I wish I had access to this information back in high school.........I wish I could have been home schooled.

@samvaknin

12 күн бұрын

Vaknin.

We are hard wired into addiction - (stimulus/response ??) - it seems - like monkeys?!? Thank you once again for your profound knowledge and your professional knowledge and your insight.

Excellent topic, thank you!

When I was a child, I would have held onto the first marshmallow because I was given a job (don't eat marshmallow), and I would do my best to not let other people down. 😅

@breemorrison901

14 күн бұрын

Recently, I think my world view might be more that we should all eat our marshmallows. 🙊

@alexandrugiorgianpopa1672

14 күн бұрын

I think that is another subject from Sam Vaknin and that is people pleaser cognitive distorsions

Professor Vaknin, do you know any resources for developing optism and trust in the world and its people? I would like to stop being pessimistic.

@moranasprowler

14 күн бұрын

Lick the marshmallow. I'm not Vaknin but I'm trying to establish some optimism within myself, and the starting point is to give room to people to be good (instead of bad) so in a sense, If you lick the marshmallow, it's likely ruined for the "expected bad person" to take it away instead of giving you another one; however it leaves you complaint to the test (you haven't eaten it) and open to earning additional one is the tester is truthful. Building your strength, in spite of wrongdoers is what gives you optimism in the end. Being peaceful instead of harmless, in a nutshell, know who you are and act in your own interest with every action you take. It's a process, and a long one, but the payout is well worth it in the end. Right on this great topic, that would be perseverance/stamina. Good luck,🍀

Dr. Vaknin, you had discussed in another of your videos how order & fairness are a fallacy; that the "agreement" we make with society in no way guarantees positive results in life.... sometimes people are punished unjustly, etc. So, doesn't the Pessimist actually have a more acurate world view, ie., better reality testing than the Optimist? 🤔

@samvaknin

13 күн бұрын

I am a perennial pessimist, so I am biased.

Now I want a marshmallow

Very interesting

Very interesting topic. Would you say that someone who doesn’t trust the world also does not trust themselves?

@samvaknin

14 күн бұрын

Yes. It is a projection.

@chrishintz1077

14 күн бұрын

@@samvaknin thanks for the reply.

would the delayed gratification that is diminished in narcissism relate to a narrow domain that involve goal directed ness in the short term or long term from social pressures and being less sensitive to things like guild and shame? or is it across contexts

@samvaknin

13 күн бұрын

All-pervasive.

Another "bullseye shot" professor.

Marshmallow test, third outcome: Sorry, while you waited patiently for your double reward, we ran out of marshmallows, so now you will get nothing, thank you for participating.