We are a Gen-X, Male Body System, on year 4 of our diagnosis with DID. We're hoping that by exploring the issues that we deal with as a System, we might in turn help other Systems by sharing our experiences, current research and by providing our perspective on the unique challenges faced by Male Body Systems everywhere coping with Dissociative Identity Disorder.
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******PLEASE NOTE******
We are NOT experts.
We are NOT medical or psychiatric professionals.
If you or a loved one is experiencing difficulties, please contact the professionals who can help you. Don't rely on Google, YT videos or info soundbites.
DON'T SELF-DIAGNOSE.
Don't be afraid to get Help.
Пікірлер
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Respectfully, a mental health professional using videos of people they have never evaluated in a professional setting as examples of imitative DID is extremely unethical, irresponsible, and ableist. (Yes, ableist.) Some of the featured systems had official DID diagnoses. The lecture has its merits, but it ultimately supports the notion that DID systems have to be shameful and covert to be validated, which is an untrue and harmful belief that continues to plague mental health institutions. There is a fine line between normalizing and sensationalizing plurality, and the sensationalism of serious conditions like DID and OSDD does cause significant harm to the community - we understand this. However, fake-claiming isn't just not constructive, it is just as irresponsible, reductive, and harmful to the plurality community as DID sensationalism. It shames systems into hiding, spirals real systems into self-doubt, incites hate, and discourages systems from getting help. There is no conclusive way to tell someone is faking DID by watching them online. People feel very comfortable saying that all systems must be professionally diagnosed while glossing over the fact that self-diagnosis can be done responsibly (and is sometimes the only option for people) - but all of sudden, when they think someone is faking, these same people suddenly become a mental health professional, qualified to determine someone's diagnosis or lack thereof. It just doesn't sit right with us. The Rings System has a great video about this exact lecture: kzread.info/dash/bejne/p5aDxbmSn9nJlLw.html - The Atlas System
Rosemarie, you are such a delight. This cake looks fantastic. Much love from the Atlas System!
Thank you for your video. I do have childhood amnesia that I discovered after I saw a timestamped video that blatantly contradicted everything I believed about my timeline. Other than that, I do know that I suffered moderate to severe, permanent abuse. It is only after an important retraumatization that left me in shatters and the whole amnesia, erratic behaviours, terrible and permanent fog hit me like a ton of bricks. The level of dysfunction of trauma-related dissociation is just heinous. The incapacity of remembering anything significant, the constant loops of emotions and flashbacks, it’s truly debilitating and painful and most people are scared of it. It is very isolating. I have found that people are strangely more accepting to "there are two wolves into me" than they are of "I stared at walls the entire day" or "ok so apparently I did my admin yesterday and have 0 recollections of having done so". Now I’m more stable but I wouldn’t like to go back there even for a minute. It still sucks but it’s still okay. At that point my psychiatrist suggested that it could be also a dissociative disorder, unfortunately I already had known of the whole DID online and I just got totally terrified. If I didn’t know I probably would have provided more genuine answers and probably could have a confirmation or infirmation by now. It is very difficult to find competent professionals who can do a differential. It is also very scary. The fleeting nature of the disorder also makes it feel bizarre and unwanted, and I fear most than all to be perceived as a nutjob who gaslighted myself into it. After having landed in hospital, I guess now the level of distress is more credible, but it had to go up to that point for getting medical attention. The reason I want now to pursue a proper assessment is because I want appropriate therapy. I want to feel better and having a life worth living. Now I feel like chunks of myself are stolen from me, or inaccessible. In that regard I always feel very puzzled at people describing headmates and presenting it as a sort of cool internal gang, whereas for me it’s truly a disorder of solitude and disconnect within myself. I can understand that once someone managed to map their systems out correctly, it is attractive to present them in a less gloomy way. I would believe that social media is changing the presentation of even genuine systems, as the pressure for positivity is huge. You have to be successful even in the sheer pain of your disorder. That’s not nice. On the other hand, smaller support groups have provided a great and intelligent solace with often profound insight and empathy that many people around me are incapable to provide because they have no idea how that feels inside. When I say "I’m feeling a permanent disconnection from myself and feel like an automaton doing the things that have to be done but am not truly there, and it isn’t comfortable, it’s distressing", I can see in their eyes they have no idea what I’m talking about. Sometimes even therapists would raise an eyebrow. There isn’t a single aspect of my life that wouldn’t be easier if I didn’t struggle with this. I’d really would love have boring stuff. PTSD-Dissociative Subtype is already confirmed but there are indications it could be more OSDD/DID. Honestly I hope not. Thank you for this video it really helps to know that I am not alone being uncomfortable by the too often freak show style that some channels tend to go for. I’m just a bit sorry for Gianu System as she has a diagnosis and it’s visible she’s doing her better to cheer up, and her content is used to illustrate the part of lecture about imitated DID, that was pretty unfair.
Love your kitties 😸 I have a big dog 🐕 she's a lab mixed with mastiff..so a giant lab basically 😂 she's awesome
Can add my name to safe space! My name is Percy!
Of course you may, Percy! 💕
@@TheInfinitySystem THANK YOU THANK YOU
Thank you for being safe
Thank you so much. This is a cute story though so sad but happy too. Can you possibly add Lenora, Anora and Don?
Sure thing!
I love this! It’s already started to trigger out our littlest little, zani
Most welcome! There's plenty more of these stories here on a playlist.💕💪👥
Thanks to all of you for this production. I read this in 6th grade and loved it. Hearing it again was wonderful.
You are most welcome. 💕💪👥
Thank you for the video
Most welcome.
the painful part is how you said they were respectable in public. because thats what happens all the time. always hiding how horrid they get when they know they can get away with it. its terrifying. makes me even more anxious about every potential hint, since it could be nothing or the biggest cry of help they can risk to show. man. i hope you can find things to do like going to malls etc that are safe to do. i know the frustration of not having any freedom. i really like your makeup and commentary about clothes. heres to hoping you get more of your own space, to do whatever you want to & talk and dress however you want. (im 19 so starting to. not be a teen anymore i guess, but in my experience i havent started being one til i was 17. so my honest, independant and loud phase is seen as rudeness n whatnot, and often used as an argument to dismiss my fight for freedom as temper tantrums? what im trying to say is. nothing feels worse than not having autonomy, especially in that life stage.)
That critical, slavedriver voice: lots of people have it (even normies). Ours is just a more fleshed out personality. She’s very religious and very young. We sing “Jesus loves me” and she’s soothed since Jesus said little children should go to him. Can you picture how much internal cringing the rest of us adults do? But hey, it works! 😬
This was like a night in my life.... right down to the dogs barking. Thank you for this.
Most welcome. ❤️💪
Hey there. 👋🙋🙋♀ Been in counseling for like 10 years now 🙆♀🙄 and so there are times that there seems to be no forward motion. Roommate says that the wheels are what the dogs are after, and then you are the side effect. 🤷♂ Bear spray is WAY TOO INTENSE, standard pepper spray is better BECAUSE SOMETIMES WIND will blow it right back on ya. 😳😭 Wishing that you are able to move forward on your journey with enough sunshine to keep you warm, enough rain to prevent thirst, and just enough challenges to make you strong. Kindly, Cloud and the rest. 😋
Been learning more and more about our specific abuses and learning more about shame and guilt culture as well as scapegoat abuse. Doctor Rebecca Mandeville here on yotube teaches about scapegoat recovery and such. I have playlists of the things I've watched on my channel.
Love seeing yall. ❤😊
No worries about the Livestream. Please take what time you need. Energy is scarce a lot of the time. We feel you. We don't have much of a connection with our therapist, either. What you described is pretty much what we're experiencing. People don't realize how difficult it is to work and to have DID, especially when you have to. We definitely deal with that guilt when trying to relax. -- The Cabin System (Julia) 🏠
We did the same thing at the end of the month. We were looking forward to the livestream and didn't realize the month had already ended. 😂 - Nex We spent April learning about cults. It really struck me that systems have a tendency towards forming cult-like structures (hiding information, undue influence, rigid/dogmatic thinking and behavior). This is hardly surprising when you consider the environments systems develop in. I just thought that was interesting. It's helped us a lot to examine our system through this lens and challenge a lot of nasty patterns. I don't care who you are, 9-to-5s are HARD. Anyone who says otherwise is lying to themselves (and I have done this!). - Cub (I think? Mostly, anyway...)
Bikes for dogs are weird they are large thing that active the prey drive in dogs (some breeds more than others) the sight of them for dogs is also weird for the canine eye
Actually enjoyed hearing about your transportation "Difficulties." (Cheapest, most efficient sort of "Bike Light" is anything that has those nice 3M 'ribbons' sewn in. {Just realized while riding my own two-wheeler, that Rolling down the Sidewalk [if Permitted] WITH the traffic flow puts you about 14 feet away from Bright headlights. Seems to make a difference.})
Some Random Ramblings for your viewing pleasure. Share your thoughts/experiences below!
So glad to hear such a positive report !
Not sure how big on DC y'all are, but I'm wondering what are y'all's opinions on Two-Face and Ventriloquist/Scarface, two Batman villains who are said to have DID. From what I've seen, two big issues with the two is pushing the idea of "evil alters" and that suppression is key.
(I'm a singlet who age dreams) I'm at 42:08 rn, and it reminded me of when, as I was coming down from a m@$turb@t!on session, I suddenly felt The Kid (name for my age dream self) starting to pop in and I Freaked. Out., immediately pushing her away. I already experienced s3xual stuff at a very young age (p0rn0graphy was VERY easy to accidentally stumble upon online growing up), I do not need the one mentality where I am just a kid to experience it. This whole video is very insightful into how the mind and body reacts this this type of trauma, as well as how to heal. I find it especially useful, both as someone who genuinely wants to learn, and as someone who wants to write characters who have gone through things I never have as accurately as possible.
Thank you thank you thank you, safe
Thank u for this <3, Percival. - A little one
I keep coming back to this video to remind me when i doubt... Trauma doesn't lie. Those are such powerful words.
15:54 That looks like the pan my ma uses when make chocoflan! Also, love your accent!
I'm so scared of the blank spots. The Little Dark One just screams. Any tips on how to work with that fear and/or communicate with alerts that don't do anything but scream in darkness?
Making them a Safe Space would be a good place to start, and be sure to mention it to your therapist/team (provided you have one). Safe Spaces can be anywhere you feel 'safe' or can be created. Ours is in our closet! We did a video on them, you can find it here: kzread.info/dash/bejne/gYWgrLN-c5y_qZM.html 💕💪👥
I love the cat camio
Moon Knight Season 1 comes out on Blu-Ray on April 30 for those wanting to watch without a Disney+ subscription. I was blown away by how relateable the D.I.D. representation was in this show!
We were always afraid of hypnotherapy; first was cause of religious bs, then was cause we didn't want to risk creating false memories. We've started to suspect biodad may also have DID but are scared to bring it up more than i already have in case it causes him to flood. :') i gave him the contact info for where we found a specialist but i also suspect that was forgot. he does remember we have it and such but also I kinda feel like he's pulled away since we mentioned we noticed patterns in his recall. (i could also just be paranoid cause im so used to being ghosted if i tell anyone i care about them) :'D Hope y'all had a good dinner!💕🌌
Hello Percival, I’d like to thank you for the story, it helped one of our littles recognize what “real” could mean. P.S, could you add “Little Rosie” and “Amani” to the sheep list? It would mean a lot, thank you. -Nic
Of course! We'll add them in next episode.💕💪👥
We have 4 littles that are watching this right now! :] Our names are Ollie, Octavia, Floris, and Ember While we were watching I remember that our grandma gave us a velveteen rabbit plushie and I found it in the pile of plushies on our bed!
Thank you for sharing your names! We'll add all of them to the flock. 💕💪👥
Ty 😀
this was one of our childhood books we lost years ago! a little, Tim, is very happy about this!
We'll add Tim to the flock of sheep. 💕💪👥
Thank you Percival, we had a hard day and your stories are helping so much
You are most welcome!
We got to this laaaate. Apologies. It's good to hear that your employer is being awesome though! Sending all the hugs from Scotland, to you all. :)
I'm not watching/listening to this for fear of my mental health taking a fall (already got "frightened" just by reading the comments) Just wanna say how brave y'all are for sharing things so personal with us, and I wish you all the best going forward. Shame on those who let anyone- let alone a child- go through something like this.
Glad to hear from you all! Glad to hear things are well. AMAZING about your job!!
I'm so happy to hear this! it sounds like she actually cares and we're emotional (positive) for you finding such an amazing sounding manager (why am i crying lol)
It's good to hear that it worked out. I'm also kind of baffled that they went that extra mile. Not sure that it's so much trauma as I can't figure out what's motivating them. We really struggle with chronic illness so we've basically gaslit ourselves into trying to be the perfect worker so that we can support ourselves and live the life we wanna live. I'm trying to keep this positive, but in all honesty, we would never do this, because we would be putting far too much on the table, and wouldn't have anything to fall back on if it went awry. Hope things continue in a positive direction. Everyone needs to do what's best for themselves, given the context of their situation. - Angel
🙋🙋♀💁♂ (Raja, Becky, and Timmy) 👋 = the rest of us 09:24 - Absolutely get it about the being on the edge and having even someone you know (even a friend) extending the energy of compassion will 'break' us. That can either be towards submission and tearing up, or assertion as Protectors stand-by. 12:04 - Unadulterated compassion like that (from a person that is perceived a trusted) would likely just make us go from tears to sobbing (and then the other person is thinking that they did something wrong, UGH!! Don't love this condition's properties). 14:00 - Walking the walk and being accepted as we are is not something that we even really dream of. Viewing as an average person (Ha Ha), *as an employer, if an employee's performance through in a day's workout outweighs the loss of that employee for a 'day', it is sooooo cost effective to keep that employee. ESPECIALLY* when considering the quality of today's candidates that seem to believe in minimal performance on the job. 19:00 - See what I'm talking about how any *workers* are difficult to find since the 'Great Resignation'. Back in '74 was in a car wreck (some surgery) and subsequently in the hospital a couple days. When I called my employer the morning of the 3rd day to explain, I was informed that I had been replaced. *"There is a difference between talking the walk, and walking the walk", said Morpheus to Neo in 'The Matirx'.* Short Live-stream (30min or ...) on Saturday March 30th? 🤞
Have to work on Saturdays so likely on Sunday instead. 💕👍
@@TheInfinitySystem - *Sunday March 31st would be AWESOME!* 💖 💪🫂
Woohoo on getting workplace support. Sympathize with the meltdown issues. I’ve found that functioning during an issue used to be “better” when I just switched to my version of Bootstrap (when he showed). Now that I’m consciously fighting to keep everyone controlled I have to isolate and go inward for a few hours of self-care. It’s supposed to be progress…