As a therapist it is possible to have compassion for all people. That does not condone the harm that narcissists can cause.

@healnpd Thank you for joining us with your insight. Look forward to next time.

At 19:00 minutes in is the answer to EVERYONE'S question.

@LisaTaylor-Austin

5 күн бұрын

splitting?

@electrifyingct4303

5 күн бұрын

@LisaTaylor-Austin I mean the fact that most people arrive here with the question "can I also now have NPD from living with someone who has it for too long?" I've been searching for honest intelligent answers to the "NPD" question for years. Been in a custody battle for my child, and been made to feel like I'm "crazy" and "wrong" through the entire process.... it will literally cause trauma to people who do not suffer from NPD.

@LisaTaylor-Austin

5 күн бұрын

@@electrifyingct4303 Sorry to hear of your situation. Narcissistic abuse absolutely causes trauma and sometimes PTSD in the partner. Gaslighting can make a partner feel "crazy." Living with someone with NPD does *not* cause the partner to have NPD - ever. NPD starts in toddler years and is a relationship issue with the primary caretaker. Online some people falsely label reactive abuse as the partner having developed NPD. This is not true. Thank you for watching and I hope this channel can be helpful to you.

@electrifyingct4303

5 күн бұрын

@LisaTaylor-Austin It was very helpful, thank you very much. As of today, I finally feel free of the "guilt" for the first time in 5 years.

@LisaTaylor-Austin

5 күн бұрын

@@electrifyingct4303 This is wonderful! I am so happy to hear this! Subscribe, if you haven't already, to be notified of more content like this. Have a great weekend.

Some of the comments are as thought provoking as this video. Maybe it’s possible NPD can be treated but not cured. I’m codependent and imo codependency can only be treated but not cured. The conditions that caused these issues in the first place occurred so early in life they are deeply ingrained. Parental narcissism is exceptionally challenging because much of society expects us to overlook and understand mom’s or dad’s abusive behavior. The danger is in going to the opposite extreme of demonizing all narcissists. But l have come to realize that dehumanizing any person or group diminishes our own humanity.

@LisaTaylor-Austin

22 күн бұрын

Thank you for your well thought out comment. It is appreciated. Thank you for viewing and I hope you will be back for our videos on NPD.

Life . . . Out the window _ mine

There’s no research to demonstrate NPD can be cured. All the existing research is that it can’t be addressed in a permanent way. If I’m wrong please provide a reference. You are providing hope to victims that is not realistic.

@LisaTaylor-Austin

2 ай бұрын

This would need to be answered by @healnpd /My opinion is that if the person with NPD is not interested in working on themselves and dealing their issues in therapy, remaining with them is disheartening and can be demoralizing. In those cases it is best to leave and if a person cannot do not that, it best to focus on self. This would be my advice for any situation where needs are not being met, there is abuse and self esteem is being eroded. Your question is a good one. Thank you for watching.

@markgamache6377

2 ай бұрын

@@LisaTaylor-Austin Yes, I've watched some of his content and his understanding of NPD is excellent. I take issue with his crusade to humanize the narcissist. They are pitiful, yes, but they have no ego (literally) that is the reason they need others reflecting reality for them to experience (they've outsourced their ego). This is a result of childhood trauma, but leaves them in a state that is incapable of being addressed by therapy. There's no person inside, it was killed in favor of the construct of the false-self. @healnpd quoted Winnicott, but fails to see the full implication: "baby gazes at his mother's face and finds himself therein" all there is for NPD is the gaze, the baby is a bad object and had to be disposed of in favor of pleasing a not 'good-enough' mother (again Winnicott). Treating someone with NPD like a human can be a dangerous mistake. Sorry if that seems harsh, and for the long rant.

@LisaTaylor-Austin

2 ай бұрын

You are not ranting but expressing your opinion and I know others have it as well. Perhaps it depends in the degree - some believe narcissism is a spectrum. Those people believe that NPD can be healed (I'm not speaking for Dr. Ettensohn but people in general). I believe there is a marked difference between narcissistic style and NPD. I am aware there are those who believe it can be healed and those who believe it cannot. It is an interesting debate. That said, I like to focus in my therapy, on the significant other who has been affected@@markgamache6377 I do know Bessel van der Kolk, MD believes it can be treated. He is an expert on trauma. For me, treated and cured are distinctions. Here is an article "Narcissism is Treatable. The Priority for Dominance in Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Traps to Avoid in Psychotherapeutic Treatment," by International Journal on Neuropsychology and Behavioural Sciences. It states at the end of the article that narcissism can be cured.

@brandonmcalpin9228

2 ай бұрын

First of all.. Nobody is insisting that NPD can be “cured”. Nobody is suggesting that NPD can be completely eliminated from a person’s pathology. If you watch his videos, he clearly states that even when a patient is *healed*, they will still probably have narcissistic personality style. However, they will be able to create genuine bonds with people, they’ll be able to act authentically and have a much more fulfilling life. Secondly, I’d hate to be that guy, but his channel isn’t about giving hope to “the victims”, it’s about giving hope to people who suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Do Narcissists tend not to go to therapy? Yes and no, but going around spreading misinformation about things you don’t understand, demonizing an entire population of people, is only going to make Narcissists avoid therapy even more. Why would they? Why should they? It says online from some dude in a duck suit that it can’t be cured. PS: There’s a plethora of studies that prove long lasting change can occur with psychotherapy.

@michellesecrett1

2 ай бұрын

@@markgamache6377the victims (I am that has healed) need to learn to see people as complete people and learn that we can’t heal a person and that our time and energy is priceless and when someone shows us who they are, we need to know our worth enough to step away from something that is painful. Personally, my healing taught me, I needed to lean into my own narcissism and put myself first

She’s has to work on her frequent interjections, it’s jarring and annoying. There’s likely a lag in the mic, so the sound comes in as he’s speaking, which can make it hard to articulate thoughts when you’re interrupting the flow of speech. Plus, it’s better to sit in silence until the guest is finished. Not trying to be a jerk, I think that may help you down the road. I’m not the only one, I promise. Dr. Mark is just too nice to say it. Lol. Thanks for interviewing him though. He’s the 🐐 when it comes to NPD

@LisaTaylor-Austin

2 ай бұрын

Thank you for your feedback. I have already mentioned this to Dr. Ettensohn as something I noticed and will work on. It is an occupational hazard :) Thanks for watching. He was was very informative to viewers.

@marcuskwek3832

2 ай бұрын

You've got to work with the way you provide feedback too mate. It's too direct and not tactful. Oops. Looks like I've to as well 😂

@brandonmcalpin9228

2 ай бұрын

@@marcuskwek3832 Too direct? I don’t get you humans sometimes, with your silly social mores and conventions. So what should I do, not speak my mind, or hold back what I truly think or feel? Isn’t that just being.. objectively fake and perhaps even manipulative? I don’t get it. I’ve met people who would give me the MOST fake smile, using the most pretentious tone of voice, almost as if they’re speaking to a customer on the phone. I do not get why in our culture it is deemed acceptable to be fake to each other, conceal our true motives and feelings from each other with a crooked smile and a forced gesture of politeness, while thinking and feeling something vastly different. It’s so weird. 😂 You should read the book Elephant in the Brain, it talks about this very phenomenon. I’m not mad, just ranting about typical Narcissistic bs. Anyway. I suppose I was a bit of a pompous asshole about it, but in all fairness, she took it like a champ. She was a good sport about it. So 🤷‍♂️ PS: There was nothing tactless about your comment though.

@marcuskwek3832

2 ай бұрын

@@brandonmcalpin9228 I think we can and definitely should speak our minds. But how we phrase our message affects how it is received. I felt like the way you came off was too directive, kinda like you're the creator's boss of some sorts. Like we don't need to be fake and all and we definitely can communicate what we feel while still being tactful in taking into account the receiver's feelings when we write/speak i.e. imagine if you were in Lisa Taylor's shoes and received the comment you wrote, would you not feel it lacks tact and possibly a little upset by it? That said... The reason I called your comment out was actually because am very much guilty of being tactless too (several family & friends have called me out irl), and I guess I just have the habit of calling out behaviours in others that I do myself. Btw, it's pretty cool because I've also read the Elephant in the Brain actually (hi-five!) and really, really enjoyed it. I would think the book is more so an explainer of human behaviour rather than a call out or some sort of warning, eh? Like it's not saying we humans are a bunch of fake asses and we ought to change, but more so sharing about the reasons why we have to conceal our initial/instinctual 'genuine' feelings/urges, because if not society will probably be in chaos, maybe? P.S. Thanks for letting me know you're cool with my comment though as well as taking the time to write all this out - hope you've a great day ahead.

@chapero1

25 күн бұрын

What are you talking about?