This is Why Foster Parents Have to Be the "Bad Guys"

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Be The Village
P.O. Box 348
Maineville, OH 45039

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  • @MS-vi9xo
    @MS-vi9xo4 жыл бұрын

    Well, seems to me this “caregiver” should NOT be allowed to be a “caregiver”. Sadly, there are those in Foster Care for the money and not the kids. You are 100% correct! It’s about the kids; not the adults. What is best for the kids? Then do it.

  • @Dan5819

    @Dan5819

    4 жыл бұрын

    Yes, I had family members who did it for the money. Makes me so sad for these children.

  • @stormchasingirl1133

    @stormchasingirl1133

    4 жыл бұрын

    Oh yes. Lots are in it for the money. Which is clearly not a thing for this family. I wish they could have been foster parents for me for a short bit. My foster family was great, but I had tough teenage years. Could have used a respite with these guys!

  • @lf206

    @lf206

    4 жыл бұрын

    That’s so ridiculous! 🤦🏻‍♀️ The money isn’t even enough to be worth it if that’s your only motive. If you’re meeting the child’s needs as you should be, there’s really not much leftover, so why?

  • @monicarodrigues985

    @monicarodrigues985

    4 жыл бұрын

    "Whose needs!? Those brats are lucky I took them in. A bowl of cereal, worn down clothes and a garbage bag are enough for them. They're needs? What about me!? I have to be compensated for my troubles!"

  • @Adulting_Autistic

    @Adulting_Autistic

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@monicarodrigues985 Please tell me you're not serious. 😊

  • @lizhumble9953
    @lizhumble99534 жыл бұрын

    Do not offer to pay that caregiver. She does not like you. She can turn that around to hurt you. Think trafficking. Do not offer an exchange of money, so you do not get in trouble.

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    Fair point.

  • @annelyceimgrund6884
    @annelyceimgrund68844 жыл бұрын

    Just hearing this hurts my heart for Miss A and her brother. As for the other foster parent, I realize that no one likes being called out, but not having a child buckled into a proper, age-appropriate seat belt is beyond outrageous. You did the right thing, and also attempted to do it as circumspectly as possible. Truth is, *you guys* are the ones who have the right to be angry if another parent puts you in the position of even *needing* to report safety risks, abuse, or any other potentially dangerous situation for children in their care! Sorry. I shouldn’t even get started here, so I’ll just end with, “Thank you for being a conscientious advocate for children in general and for Miss B, specifically, as your foster child.”

  • @annelyceimgrund6884

    @annelyceimgrund6884

    4 жыл бұрын

    Oops, meant Miss A.

  • @annelyceimgrund6884

    @annelyceimgrund6884

    4 жыл бұрын

    I agree. Sometimes the other parent will probably just “know,” though, or strongly suspect. Hard to keep the shock off your face when seeing a toddler in a car who’s not buckled into an appropriate 3-point safety seat.

  • @lovekyds

    @lovekyds

    4 жыл бұрын

    Bios, caseworkers, and foster parents need car seat training, I’ve seen all be super negligent with car seats

  • @tawniaanderson1324
    @tawniaanderson13244 жыл бұрын

    foster mom also : this will continue to be an issue, in our county hearings are every 3 months & you only get the judges attention for a minute... when I advocate for my foster baby’s best interest (visits with his sisters) I ask his GAL to add it to the court order. For example miss A’s brother gets 2 overnights each month with his sister at your home. Then it’s not respite care & doesn’t effect “her” Per-diem. I don’t apologize for being a mama bear for my foster anymore than I would for my bio’s! I love him like he’s mine & fight for him like he’s mine ...until he’s not.

  • @lorettatheibert1663

    @lorettatheibert1663

    3 жыл бұрын

    some states will not do it that way

  • @sarahj8735
    @sarahj87354 жыл бұрын

    When I was a private foster care case worker, I was always the “bad worker” according to our local DHHR because I was more concerned with how the kids felt/wanted than how the county workers felt. I don’t care if a case workers feelings are hurt for a few minutes, I do care if a bad placement causes even more trauma to a child though! (luckily I write policy now !!)

  • @ashleynoble2880

    @ashleynoble2880

    4 жыл бұрын

    Way to move up and make a difference! My husband used to be a case worker and he ended up changing jobs because he couldn't handle how bad the system was and to him the changes weren't being made.

  • @oliviakoch4710

    @oliviakoch4710

    4 жыл бұрын

    Good for you!!

  • @teresayates332
    @teresayates3324 жыл бұрын

    I’m so glad you shared this because that goes to show some people are just in this for the money. That other caregiver should be removed from the program permanently! But there is already a shortage of foster homes that she will stay. It’s why foster care gets the bad rap it does.....I could go on and on.

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    I hear you!

  • @niteritr
    @niteritr4 жыл бұрын

    You guys are the best bad guys I've ever seen! Hope things work out. Sending hugs for you guys and Miss A.

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    Thank you so much!

  • @heidihokes1971
    @heidihokes19714 жыл бұрын

    After the premiere ended, I had to go back & watch it again. I want to tell you from my own childhood experience, those kids (Miss A) can see your heart, & I guarantee you, she will never, ever forget your love & kindness!! I haven't forgotten someone that came to my rescue, took good care of me & genuinely showed me a love I had never seen before & never experienced again. Those two weeks with those people will forever hold a very special place in my heart & I was only 9 yrs old then & am now 60 & just never will forget their special love!!! I guarantee you, Miss A will never forget yours!!! Thank you SO MUCH for being sunshine on the cloudy days for her!!😘💞

  • @kate_6436
    @kate_64364 жыл бұрын

    Wow I’m so concerned about Miss A’s siblings now I hope they’re alright and safe with their caregivers

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    There is no immediate concern, otherwise... I'd have reported it lol.

  • @horsewithnoname12345

    @horsewithnoname12345

    4 жыл бұрын

    Be The Village if they are cutting corners with not providing a car seat, I wonder what else they do not care about and are being too lax about! Car seats are very serious. Things that make you wonder....

  • @LindaY26
    @LindaY264 жыл бұрын

    Whitney & John, continue to advocate! That caregiver needs to soul search and decide if she’s in it for the kids or the money. Like you, I will always advocate for my kiddos, even if I piss off caseworkers. Just a suggestion, if you haven’t already, write an email to all the people who were involved in this. It creates the dreaded paper trail, but forces caseworkers to admit. Also CC their supervisors. I’m at 15 years fostering and once it’s in writing, caseworkers have to do their jobs. Add in what you saw with caregiver. I email all my updates and my worker will usually phone me to talk about it. Foster care is supposed to be about the kids, but sometimes it’s about who is lazy in note taking and who isn’t. I email updates on my kiddos every Monday; it can be a long or short update, but it’s all in writing. Keep up the great work you’re doing. ❤️

  • @imjuliewaters
    @imjuliewaters4 жыл бұрын

    How does that caregiver even still have her job if she put a child in danger like that? Wow.

  • @madmessw127
    @madmessw1274 жыл бұрын

    It’s really sad when adults make the child suffer for an issue they have with another adult

  • @jvaughnification
    @jvaughnification4 жыл бұрын

    I wish there were more people like you both in this world. You are most certainly NOT the bad guys....like you said you have to do what is right by the kids ...period. I hope things get better for your situation for Miss A's sake & she is so lucky to have ya'll!

  • @aimeemarsh37
    @aimeemarsh372 жыл бұрын

    So much for putting the kids first. Shame on them.

  • @megajoe92012
    @megajoe920124 жыл бұрын

    Why has there not been more done to get the kids less spaced out and in fewer homes?

  • @IsaBelliza

    @IsaBelliza

    4 жыл бұрын

    Oh this question has a complicated answer. Welcome to foster care is the quick one.

  • @cait812

    @cait812

    4 жыл бұрын

    @Thora Friganza it's hard to keep large cross age sibling groups together.

  • @MeraleeCrowl

    @MeraleeCrowl

    4 жыл бұрын

    It's about where they can find beds at the start of the case. After that, they try not to move the kids unless there's a problem because it's very difficult on the kids to bounce around.

  • @IsaBelliza

    @IsaBelliza

    4 жыл бұрын

    Thora Friganza no, it means the foster families have to work together to get the kids to see each other as much as possible. The foster families have to put the kids first and not themselves or the money (which is a tiny amount in the first place).

  • @serobinson1

    @serobinson1

    4 жыл бұрын

    Many families won’t take multiple children ..

  • @skylinmay4846
    @skylinmay48464 жыл бұрын

    I was in Foster care for about 6 months and my foster parents made sure I seen my brother (he’s of age so it wasn’t as hard to arrange) he cried and told her how grateful he was that they were so good to me. (He was only 18 so they wouldn’t let him have me) We still go to church with them. They will always be a part of my story, I will never forget the love and kindness they showed me when I was so scared.

  • @raelynn84
    @raelynn844 жыл бұрын

    I just wanted to say thank you for Truly caring about the kids in your care. Miss A is very lucky to have such caring, amazing foster parents. I was in foster care from 7-18 and lived in 13 homes and I would say only 2 homes truly cared and sadly the rest cared about the money! They need to remember what a hard stressful and alone feeling this is during this time and how they can use some normalcy and family to help get through it. So they need to stop being selfish and act like a mature adult with the child’s best interests in mind.

  • @fabiola993
    @fabiola9934 жыл бұрын

    pop OFF! i’m currently watching and i appreciate y’all for being honest about what happens behind the scenes

  • @ohitsmimi096
    @ohitsmimi0964 жыл бұрын

    I love how passionate you are and how determined you are to make sure these kids are getting together. Your family is truly so beautiful and inspiring 🖤

  • @amyseitz2365
    @amyseitz23654 жыл бұрын

    I Just love watching your channel and family. I live in Clermont County which is pretty close to you.I’m so glad you guys fight so hard for Miss. A to see her siblings❤️. My kids(12&9) half sister(15)was in foster care for three years and we only got to see her a few times.She was in foster care in Indiana. Thankfully now she is out of foster care and lives with her grandparents. We are able to see her on a regular basis and it’s amazing!! I see what happens to children when their siblings are taken away from them. It’s Devastating to witness. Keep fighting for Miss.A and ALL children in the Foster Care system. ❤️❤️

  • @BlondeIndianK
    @BlondeIndianK4 жыл бұрын

    Ugh, how frustrating!! It’s nice to see your love for Ms A in how you fight for her and are clearly in her corner. Thanks again for sharing and I hope the siblings are able to have some really good together time soon! 💕

  • @natalieh1950
    @natalieh19504 жыл бұрын

    I want to say as a 16 year old that hasn't seen one sister since I was 11, and haven't seen two other sisters since October (their mom wont let me cuz I spoke up about what life was like living with her) it makes me happy to see foster parents fighting to give siblings that time. I live with my grandma(should be in foster care but the case workers are already overloaded they don't have the space to put me anywhere, so I'm here) and she doesn't care about whether or not I see my sisters. She finds it annoying that I still get upset knowing that I'm not allowed to be around them because of distance (the case of the first sibling) or because the abusers don't like that I spoke up. Hopefully this issue is resolved soon, and that woman does seem to only be interested in money, which is sad.

  • @KM-ye9so

    @KM-ye9so

    4 жыл бұрын

    So sorry that you can relate to this.

  • @Kirsten_is_cursed10

    @Kirsten_is_cursed10

    4 жыл бұрын

    Hang in there, my dear, things will get better 💙 I don’t know when, but some day.

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    I am so sorry...

  • @natalieh1950

    @natalieh1950

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@BeTheVillageCommunity it's alright! I'm working to get myself emancipated, I've had family members, and friends supporting me getting emancipated. I'm hoping to not be here by Christmas

  • @amymenjivar3489

    @amymenjivar3489

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@natalieh1950 Have you taken a look at Job Corps? You can live on their campuses and get job training and education. If you look into it and apply now, you might be able to get in whether or not you are emancipated. Job skills etc will help prove your emancipation case. Make sure you have your ID, birth certificate and social security card before you leave your current situation! Good luck!!!!

  • @badrobotbaby
    @badrobotbaby4 жыл бұрын

    You guys are literally gold. ❤️

  • @ellebray
    @ellebray4 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for advocating for the kids in your care (and those that aren't). I'm also a mandated reporter as a teacher and it is both the easiest and hardest thing in the world to make those phone calls but at the end of the day, its about the kids! You're doing an awesome job!! You've totally inspired me to look in to fostering here in Australia- I've got an info session coming up soon!

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    Yes!!

  • @mariaj8917
    @mariaj89174 жыл бұрын

    We love you for all that you do for all this kids ❤️❤️❤️

  • @dinkywinkydog1311
    @dinkywinkydog13114 жыл бұрын

    You said it all and this is why the foster care system fails. They don’t want you to make things good for the kids they want it to suck. When you try they make it so stressful eventually you get worn out!!! However please continue to fight for what’s right!!! You got a large community behind you!!!

  • @darbrooks86
    @darbrooks86 Жыл бұрын

    You guys are the best bad guys ever! May you be blessed for advocating for the children and the abundance of love that you give!

  • @kianac9719
    @kianac97194 жыл бұрын

    I’m so sorry you guys are going through this but just know that you’re doing the right things for the right reasons and it’s beautiful to watch how much you care about not only Miss A but all the kids and report what you need to. I can’t imagine how frustrating it is but I’m frustrated for you and Miss A. I hope it gets better soon and hopefully that caregiver will be reprimanded for this. It’s not right that she’s mad at you for doing exactly what you have to and protecting the kids. You are the good guys and I can’t believe that all the others are frustrated that you’re trying to get the kids together. They seem to all be not doing fostering for the right reasons.... Hope you guys are ok x sending love from Australia (we love you too Darcy)

  • @bpgk2007
    @bpgk20074 жыл бұрын

    I'm sorry all of you had to deal with this especially the kid's. The Foster care system can be so broken. I dealt with this with my nieces when I was younger and it can be so stressful and heartbreaking. You all are doing a great job. Keep up the good work. I know Ms. A will always remember what you have done for her and the love you have shown.

  • @queengabbie3850
    @queengabbie38504 жыл бұрын

    I don’t know much about the foster care system so thank you for educating me by posting this video. I can’t believe the many hoops you have to jump through just to allow these siblings to have a sleep over! Hopefully what’s best for the kids is kept in the end ❤️

  • @erikahipps
    @erikahipps4 жыл бұрын

    You guys are amazing there needs to be more people in the world like you!

  • @shelleyhuprich611
    @shelleyhuprich6114 жыл бұрын

    You continue to do the right thing for Miss A. She is lucky to have you❤️. Thank you for fighting for the children ❤️

  • @tgap860
    @tgap8604 жыл бұрын

    Where Aunt Madea at? These people need a lesson in LOVE! Keep fighting the good fight, keep letting love shine! These children will never forget how much you guys fought for them.

  • @oneproudmama1565
    @oneproudmama15654 жыл бұрын

    God Girl I WISH We Could Have More People Like You!!!! We need more people that care like u 2 do

  • @J0ELLEx
    @J0ELLEx2 жыл бұрын

    unrelated but the way you guys look at each other is so sweet and loving :)

  • @nitarusak6215
    @nitarusak62154 жыл бұрын

    I am glad your pushing for the kids to be together. You are Awesome foster parents

  • @JenniferSanchez-ob7yi
    @JenniferSanchez-ob7yi3 жыл бұрын

    You are a good person and are looking out for all those children. And we do not have enough people like you in this world. You are awesome.

  • @lollypie100
    @lollypie1004 жыл бұрын

    This is why many kids suffer in the system....because people don't speak up for the kids! Thank you for standing up for the kids🥰

  • @aaliyahsandoval9579
    @aaliyahsandoval95794 жыл бұрын

    I was in foster care for only 2 weeks then I got put in a permanent home and I’ve been there ever sense. Thank you for all the stuff you do. You change kids life’s. Even the little things.

  • @klaritydawn
    @klaritydawn4 жыл бұрын

    My first time watching you guys and I did sub! I subbed bc I can clearly see that you're in it for the right reasons and you truly care about these kiddos! My sisters and I were in Foster homes more than once so this would be my connection. I wanted to Foster or actually Adopt but my health became an issue so I couldn't do it. I just want to say THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU who Foster because you TRULY DO care about these little souls! It's a frightening place to be in. Being taken from your home is bad enough but being separated from your siblings can be a terrifying experience. May God Bless and Keep Each of these lil children and Each Foster Parent who comes to the rescue of these more often than not broken and damaged children. You are Appreciated and Loved by the children that come through your homes...Please know this. ;)

  • @islanddiamond3737
    @islanddiamond37374 жыл бұрын

    I'm proud of you guys for fighting the right fight for those kids who need to be together. I lost a friend because I reported certain issues but I know I did the right thing. Never be afraid to be the bad guy we all have to be sometimes.

  • @kathysigler5205
    @kathysigler52054 жыл бұрын

    No good deed goes unpunished. You guys are great, and it's great to see a mandated reporter actually reporting what they're supposed to report. Many don't. I'm sorry for your frustrations but I'm glad you have each other to lean on.

  • @sazzifrazz78
    @sazzifrazz784 жыл бұрын

    It’s totally about the money but she doesn’t want to admit that.

  • @bethanyatkinson6944

    @bethanyatkinson6944

    4 жыл бұрын

    IDK... Sounds like she's not a rule follower and doesn't want to get caught by someone who is... And is trying to punish said rule follower for calling her out

  • @12kimmykins
    @12kimmykins4 жыл бұрын

    This whole situation would be beyond frustrating! Between the other caregiver creating unnecessary barriers, and the system barriers in general, there’s a lot to manage. However, as a team you both have the same goals and it’s awesome to see you both so willing to fight for Miss A. and her siblings to be together. I love that you make it about the children and not what the adults want.

  • @ASHLEYBOOKWORM85
    @ASHLEYBOOKWORM854 жыл бұрын

    I love you guys so much! Your bottom line is so clear that your all about the best for the child and that is so Amazing! God Bless You!

  • @nancyleeds4002
    @nancyleeds40024 жыл бұрын

    You guys are so great! Every time I watch your videos I think..."we should be friends! " Just wanted to throw some positivity at you! thanks for being you.

  • @samanthamcdaniel7855
    @samanthamcdaniel78554 жыл бұрын

    Thanks for sharing your story and working so hard for Miss A.

  • @themaramentality8850
    @themaramentality88504 жыл бұрын

    You guys really are the best, and truly have the kids best interest at heart!! You have inspired me to when I’m an adult to foster and give kids the same experience ❤️

  • @livingmybelovedlife8447
    @livingmybelovedlife84474 жыл бұрын

    It's so sad that a system that is there to help and protect children turns into the thing that hurts them and stops the healing. Keep doing what you are doing. I know it's exhausting to fight a system that you shouldn't have to be fighting, but as you said you are doing this for the kids not for yourself or the other adults involved.

  • @angiebluvspink
    @angiebluvspink4 жыл бұрын

    I am so sorry Miss A and her brother don't get to have their sleep over, but like they say don't mess with Mama Bear!! You are doing right by these kiddos even though it is hard. Thanks again for sharing your side and experience. I hope and pray the other hearts are softened.

  • @jenniferdowns8991
    @jenniferdowns89914 жыл бұрын

    God bless you guys,for real!!! Miss A will never forget what you have done for her......EVER

  • @girlfromsouth214
    @girlfromsouth2144 жыл бұрын

    Whitney, I was present when my cousin's young son died after a car accident. The picture of him ln the hospital bed, with his sweet little head wrapped up, is emblazoned on my heart. You absolutely did the right thing in reporting the car seat. To anyone reading this that ever has care over a child, please, please, hear my plea and NEVER drive without having the child properly restrained. It's just not worth the risk, for any reason.

  • @susansgalaxy2219
    @susansgalaxy22194 жыл бұрын

    Sending love and prayers to your family

  • @christinagolder8072
    @christinagolder80723 жыл бұрын

    I just found your videos. Makes sure to always get everything in writing. We had a case worker claim they never approved visits with siblings even though it was happening for months. We had emails and notes in their monthly team meetings showing he approved this. Always get everything in writing!!!

  • @GamingandMore95
    @GamingandMore954 жыл бұрын

    You guys are doing good work! Keep doing it! These kids need more like you! The system is broken and its people like you who can fix it!

  • @kenziewelty1973
    @kenziewelty19733 жыл бұрын

    I can SO relate to this. Had very similar issues with my foster sons...sisters foster parents. I ended up moving all the kids to my home and I’m so grateful I did.

  • @apriljugan7169
    @apriljugan71694 жыл бұрын

    When you said this is a fight worth fighting so true and it can be hard but the way you put it I will defiantly be writing it down as a reminder

  • @bdrummond5414
    @bdrummond54143 жыл бұрын

    This reminds me of the movie -it takes two-! Bless y’all for doing what you do!

  • @candacelynn4068
    @candacelynn40684 жыл бұрын

    This speaks to my soul!!! As a new foster mom with two kiddos for 6 months now.... I am constantly the "bad guy". Im getting so mad that no one seems to care!! Thanks for being real :-)

  • @KristenHuckeba
    @KristenHuckeba4 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for the real-ness! We are newly approved foster parents (with 3 young bios) and are just waiting for a phone call for our first placement. It’s been amazing watching your journey and I appreciate you sharing your real journey- not just the fun parts.

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    Best of luck to you!!

  • @itsmejennilind
    @itsmejennilind4 жыл бұрын

    I feel bad for Miss A and her siblings but I'm glad they have you both to fight for them, even if it is difficult and frustrating. I hope you continue to do this for Miss A and other kids in the future, despite the issues you're having. The kids are lucky to have you both.

  • @jennymcdermitt9995
    @jennymcdermitt99954 жыл бұрын

    I wish you were able to take all the siblings or some of them. You guys are doing great.

  • @rebeccaturner4988
    @rebeccaturner49884 жыл бұрын

    As a child I was abused and spent time in a refuge when escaping. You are amazing for fighting for miss a. The child is the most important thing and if they are breaking the rules you have to stop it from happening. Miss A is so lucky to have u.

  • @kittymervine6115
    @kittymervine61154 жыл бұрын

    Bless you.... for thinking the of the CHILDREN and the FAMILY first. So easy, just kids meeting, siblings. If my children were in foster care, I would as a family in crisis ... feel so lucky I have such a caring person caring for my child. Also my brothers, when my parents were divorcing, my brothers and I kept each other feeling like a family. We KNEW we were going to be together as a family no matter what.

  • @jennj2049
    @jennj20494 жыл бұрын

    I can't imagine how frustrating it is when you need whatever it is and you have to call someone that calls someone to call someone else etc. It's like they make things difficult and don't really care bc once they make a call it's out of their hands. Your too are absolutely amazing though 💕

  • @Morganeezy
    @Morganeezy4 жыл бұрын

    I can clearly tell you both are very amazing foster parents and good people! The other caregiver is giving me a sense that they’re like the terrible foster parent stories. Your reporting may actually save children from abuse. Those that shake up the system, make the changes ❣️

  • @serobinson1
    @serobinson14 жыл бұрын

    You guys are awesome . Keep doing what you are doing

  • @gailgagnon27
    @gailgagnon274 жыл бұрын

    Bless you... as a foster parent, I feel your pain. I have been fairly lucky with my case worker, but dealing with the red tape is tough. Fight the good fight

  • @carihoffman1851
    @carihoffman18514 жыл бұрын

    We have had similar issues with $ over other caregivers and can’t figure out how they are in it for the money, but seems very clear that they are. 😢love how open and authentic how you are with your experience!

  • @macieridgeway3813
    @macieridgeway38134 жыл бұрын

    You guys are AMAZING and miss A is lucky to have foster parents to stick up for her and even the siblings not in your care

  • @mkenz4227
    @mkenz42274 жыл бұрын

    Oh my goodness! This is incredibly frustrating! I got licensed about a month ago (in Columbus) and don't have my first placement yet. (TOTAL noob 😜) The fact that people are not in this for the kids is absolutely heartbreaking. Honestly, as a single mama (with 3 young bio kids) my biggest worry about fostering is dealing with the system and those who don't put the kids first. I wish I could pick your brain and get advice about what you've been through and how you've dealt with it. I'm thankful to at least have these videos, but I have so many more questions! Lol Thank you for sharing this raw moment ❤

  • @sandramckay6784
    @sandramckay67844 жыл бұрын

    Omg how have i only just found ur chanel u both sound so loving and dedicated.hi new subscriber from Adelaide Australia 💙💙💙

  • @BobcatPoop
    @BobcatPoop4 жыл бұрын

    I love how authentic and real you both are. You can absolutely see how genuinely you care for Miss A and her well-being and relationships with her family. It is a shame that the system is not more supportive and accommodating, especially under the current unprecedented situation globally. I'm an American in the UK and teaching in schools here I have come across situations with children in care and how their carer was absolutely "in it for the money" and it's just tragic. The only one hurt in the end is the child because ultimately their needs aren't being met. Please, keep being that rock for and loving on Miss A. I don't even know y'all but I'm sending loads of love & good vibes. I hope the others come to their senses and see the light. x

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    ❤️

  • @corrinework7071
    @corrinework70714 жыл бұрын

    This video was so insightful! Thank you for sharing :)

  • @torey4322
    @torey43224 жыл бұрын

    Good for you guys. Need more people like YOU two in foster system

  • @meraleecrowl2545
    @meraleecrowl25454 жыл бұрын

    It's amazing the differences between the states and even counties! Here in Oklahoma, that kind of thing would fall under the prudent parenting standard, which is intended to "normalize" life for the youth in foster care. I had the oldest of a sibling set of 4. The second child was with a family only 15 minutes away. The two boys had multiple sleepovers and visits. The other family kept big brother for almost a week when I had a family tragedy and I kept little brother a couple weekends so they could go out of state. We got them together about once a week to see each other and the worker wasn't even involved in that. As for "respite" that's when we ask the agency to help find somewhere for the child to stay, but even with that, the foster parents usually just give cash to the respite provider when they pick up the kids.

  • @amandacash8730
    @amandacash87304 жыл бұрын

    As soon as you said respite I cringed! And knew it financially motivated! That's so foul! Thank you for sharing this experience and putting up with everyone involved!

  • @rosamorrison1
    @rosamorrison12 жыл бұрын

    Wish more people would do it for the kids, You guys are amazing!!

  • @weir_family

    @weir_family

    Жыл бұрын

    Why else WOULD you do it, right?

  • @hairgirlrita
    @hairgirlrita4 жыл бұрын

    Keep on being YOU! I think you two are just AWESOME! I will be praying for you all! GOD BLESS YOU! ❤❤🙏❤🙏❤❤

  • @jaqoyirene4990
    @jaqoyirene49904 жыл бұрын

    How sad it's all about the money for some people. People should understand it's about the kids

  • @heidihokes1971

    @heidihokes1971

    4 жыл бұрын

    Yep!👌🏼

  • @brianagarcia8546
    @brianagarcia85464 жыл бұрын

    Kids need someone to fight for them 💖 so even though it may feel unnecessary or frustrating Mrs. A knows her happiness is worth fighting for and that’ll make an impact on her

  • @janelord3061
    @janelord30614 жыл бұрын

    So, basically, the brother's caregiver won't agree to the overnight because they would lose the money for those days?? Unbelievable!! Some people are doing this for the wrong reasons. Thank you for standing up for what is right.

  • @BeeYouXOXO
    @BeeYouXOXO4 жыл бұрын

    I wish you would have been my sister’s foster parents. My dad adopted her, and she went through so much abuse and neglect. I’m so proud of her for becoming such an amazing young woman. My dad didn’t adopt her sisters and transitioning to adulthood has been difficult for them. I’m proud of all of them because they WILL prevail despite the trauma.

  • @fionascheibel977
    @fionascheibel9774 жыл бұрын

    You guys did so well. I totally get crazy stuff happening. I had a similar stupid situation happen when I was trying to sort out the unfair way I had been treated at a church. I had the pastor pretend he knew nothing about it when he totally did because he was involved. Then other avenues of sorting it didn't work and circular conversations went on and on and a simple solution would have been to just acknowledge what happened to me shouldn't have happened and life would have gone on. But I fought alone to get it sorted for my sake and anyone else who had been or might be in the future treated in similar ways. But nope. That couldn't get to such a simple place. So after 6 months of complete crazy I gave up and cut ties with that church. Maybe losing me made no difference to anyone at the church. But I still can relate to crazy situations in any aspect of life where a simple situation can be overly complicated and people involved can cause issues for no good reason. What I have learnt is it will do your head in if you try to work out why someone acts in an illogical way.

  • @custardcream
    @custardcream4 жыл бұрын

    Wow. Just wow. I'm not surprised unfortunately. I hope that you guys are going to practice some self care because this sounds very wearing, especially because it is clear how much you care for Miss A. Maybe, by not accepting the status quo you will be a small part of permanent change happening for foster kiddos. Lots of support coming your way from a (hopefully) soon to be foster family in California x

  • @originalhaggis
    @originalhaggis4 жыл бұрын

    You can never underestimate how selfish/greedy/lazy other people can be. I feel bad for those kids. Keep doing what you’re doing! ❤️💪🏼👊🏻

  • @mione134
    @mione1344 жыл бұрын

    When you picked up the wine glass I knew this video was going to be good! 😂 You guys are doing your best! And a really great advocate for Miss A. I wish all foster parents were like you guys. You give me hope! Keep doing what your doing. You are doing great.

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    HAHA! Yes, it was a day that deserved some wine. And thank you, thank you for the reassurance and encouragement.

  • @jow.2450

    @jow.2450

    4 жыл бұрын

    I know. I looked at the shape of the glass. Was looking for clear water and ice. Nope. It’s red. 😉 Thanks for looking out for the kids.

  • @ash52019
    @ash520194 жыл бұрын

    As someone who works in the mental health field and deals with social workers on a regular basis, I highly recommend emailing as a constant form of communication-not phone calls. Leave a paper trail and also CC the SW’s supervisor on important or controversial situations. It’s amazing the power that CC’ing their supervisors has.

  • @stephaniewright340
    @stephaniewright3404 жыл бұрын

    Makes me mad..so glad my great grandmother took me and my siblings when I was little....God bless grandparents..and GOOD foster care

  • @pixxie102
    @pixxie1024 жыл бұрын

    I work in direct care/ adult foster programs and I must say I have never related MORE to one of your videos! I’m now seeing how similar ( and sometimes beyond frustrating ) both areas of care can be!! I’ve experienced moments of I’m damned if I don’t damned if I do feelings ! Advocating for others is never easy but it’s one of the most important roles caregivers fill BECAUSE we continue to do it even when you want to chuck your phone out the window 🙃 Wishing miss a and her brother a super fun visit in the nearest future possible

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    So glad this video hit another level :)

  • @speperkamp-spierenburg5413
    @speperkamp-spierenburg54134 жыл бұрын

    And they wonder why there are not enough foster family....THIS IS WHY!! Thank you for sharing.

  • @SavvyGirl751
    @SavvyGirl7514 жыл бұрын

    The kids should always come first. Always!!! Miss A and her family have been through enough if they aren’t supporting the family they need to be fostering

  • @cuwanicade8062
    @cuwanicade80624 жыл бұрын

    This is terrible! I’m so sorry to you and Miss A. It’s unfortunate that they couldn’t just make it work when you were trying to do what’s best for the children.

  • @deblavan4190
    @deblavan41904 жыл бұрын

    That is really sad! That care giver is not doing it for the right reason! And then should not be doing it at all! It is about the kids like you say! That is heart breaking the kids get hurt in the end! So sorry Miss A snd her sibling do not get their over night visit! They were both most likely looking forward to it! Just because of one greedy, hateful caregiver two children are hurt! So glad you fight for them! And also turn in things you should!! The kids come first not that nasty caregiver!!

  • @jodistevenson5479
    @jodistevenson54794 жыл бұрын

    I have 6 adopted siblings from Foster Care. My Mother gave up on us LONG before we were adults. Her husband suddenly wanted children (she was in her late 50s) and adoption can be SUPER expensive. So not all people are in it for the right reasons. Thank you for being so Genuine ❤️

  • @jasmineadkins-wills2297
    @jasmineadkins-wills22974 жыл бұрын

    Is there a way to file a complaint against the person playing dumb?? That’s surely not in the best interest of the kids! I think you did the right thing for the right reasons.

  • @ashleyberry613
    @ashleyberry6134 жыл бұрын

    I worked in child care for about a year and it is exactly what you say. All about the adults and very rarely about the kids; which is unfortunate.

  • @davestariha864
    @davestariha8644 жыл бұрын

    U guys are great dont let the system stop u guys from being great foster family you and john are seriously very great humans and I hope I can be half a great as u guys

  • @KM-ye9so
    @KM-ye9so4 жыл бұрын

    It's hard enough that these kids have to be in care to begin with, and how adults who can't put their best interest first (NOT talking about Whitney and John, of course!) are making it even harder on them. So sad. Ya'll will be in my thoughts. And Whitney, it's not being the "bad guy." It's being the advocate. Don't let anyone make you feel that there is anything bad about it. (Also, we love you too, Darcy!)

  • @BeTheVillageCommunity

    @BeTheVillageCommunity

    4 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for reminding me that being an advocate is being the bad guy, and there is nothing wrong with that.

  • @KM-ye9so

    @KM-ye9so

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@BeTheVillageCommunity Nothing wrong at all. It's what you're supposed to do, in fact!

  • @teresayates332

    @teresayates332

    4 жыл бұрын

    Oh yeah, as a Boy Scout Leader and now a mandatory reporter I have some to say to you that I say to everyone who I report. “I don’t make the rules, but I sure as heck (more colorful word is used) follow them!”

  • @KM-ye9so

    @KM-ye9so

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@teresayates332 Yep. I'm in school about a year away from becoming a teacher, and (even though I am not yet a teacher officially) I am now a mandatory reporter. I have not yet had to make a report, and it will hurt my heart so badly when I eventually have to, but it would hurt far worse if I didn't and should have.

  • @teresayates332

    @teresayates332

    4 жыл бұрын

    @K M, Yes, it will break your heart, but not because you have to report...it’s what you have seen. Most of the time these kids have already been through so much bad. Now they place where they were told that they would be safe and drama free isn’t. It should be a prosecutable crime if YOU blatantly cause stress, anxiety to these babies. I know I’m over dramatic but as a survivor of child sexual abuse this triggers me! I don’t know anything about why Ms. A’s there but her and her siblings don’t deserve this. I’ll leave my soap box now.

  • @clarissal7775
    @clarissal77754 жыл бұрын

    I have to say it seems like your agency does not handle confidentiality well and that would be a big concern for me. But I really appreciate your hearts and you guys sharing.