As an INFJ-A woman I have never had a problem setting boundaries. But I find most men wont accept that I have morals and goals. I don’t want a master I want a soulmate, to share life with. I would rather be alone then settle for less. Modern dating is painful, so many toxic and dishonest men out there.

@vedashen3573

2 жыл бұрын

"I don’t want a master I want a soulmate, to share life with." - I like this sentence. It describes the two previous sentences quite well in short. The sentence is really catchy. i get the feeling . It's about equality. It's very good that you have your own boundaries and to have no problem to set them. Also the morals and goals part is important. I like womans like that and if they are strong. The strong womans that I know are also interesting people. But I also know that not many men really like that in the end. But I write that to make you a little hope. There are men out there who want that too. I am one of them. Especially the sloumate part. But this is not about me. As I said, I just want to give you hope. And maybe give you a few tips, if you like. It is also about respect. Not only towards you as a woman but also as a human being. Because that's what you are, right? =) Problem can be as a man that you can be stamped with some women under certain circumstances simply as a dear or nice type. Has struck me in any case. But I also do not care. None of them really knows me or not good enough. Another problem why men have problems with strong women is that they have inferiority complexes. At least one. A lower self-esteem or a false one. Stick to your standards. Don't settle for less. Like you said. On the other hand, you're more likely to become unhappy. of course, the standards should also be well chosen. Therefore, a review sometimes can not hurt. However, disappointment and fear are bad advisors during the review. One should think very carefully before setting a standard lower or changing it. Incorrectly chosen standards can also lead to problems and dissatisfaction. The last sentence is also correct. i feel like a teacher right now. But the toxic part also applies to women. You should always work on yourself. And always be ready for it. The process of learning and developing never stops. Applies to the partner as well, of course. The advantage in a relationship is that you can support each other. But many people may see this more as an attack in certain situations. Never mind, this is not meant to be a novel.

@HaleyMary

2 жыл бұрын

I have that struggle, too. A lot of men act interested in me until they realize that I have morals and values such as abstinence and that I have goals for my life in terms of my art, my music, songwriting, comedy and poetry. I also hope to find a soulmate and partner in life, but it's really hard to find these days. Modern dating is so difficult that I don't even try anymore. I can only hope that an INFJ man finds me.

@chilcade5995

2 жыл бұрын

@@vedashen3573 thanks for taking the time to share your insight and wisdom. I always enjoy learning something new and strongly agree the process of learning and developing never stops. I loved that sentence. Take care and thank you.

@vedashen3573

2 жыл бұрын

@@chilcade5995 Was me a pleasure.

@vedashen3573

2 жыл бұрын

@@HaleyMary Or maybe an ENTP or ENFP. INFJ's do not necessarily have to be compatible. They also need to work on themselves and their relationship. But I have also to say that you seem to be an interessting person. So know your value and never lose hope. Possibly it happens completely unexpectedly. I write also poetry. I don't know how other INFJ men do this, but I was never on a dating platform. Also social media is nothing really for me. Maybe you'll find someone about your greatest passion. For example, by joining a group or something. Let your light shine there. At least you will have fun.

"Looking for someone to escape your life" - that summarized it all for me.

@ThreadBareHope1234

2 жыл бұрын

I agree

Maybe we need a INFJ dating app.

@cc1294

2 ай бұрын

Great idea!

Finding someone consistent, reliable, polite etc is even harder than finding someone that gives you excitement

@starshibe4231

3 ай бұрын

True

Escape all of life in general. Life feels like a bad dream most days. I wish I could just die and be free from all of this

This made me think that we INFJs are great escapists. 😀 And that needs to be stopped: Now!

@cc1294

2 ай бұрын

Already as a child I escaped, runt away when I felt hurt and still do today as an adult! Escaping situations, jobs, relationships when it doesnt feel right....even in fun sociable situations I'm always the first to leave..

I stayed single for 5 yrs to "work on myself" and during that time I was going through one of the toughest times of my life too. When I finally got into a relationship, it was for infatuation of physical appearance and putting my ideals onto that person hoping they actually meant what they said. Ended up being ANOTHER abusive relationship 😔. I'm desperste to be loved, by the right person. Being alone and lonely is a death sentence for this INFJ. So hard not to look at people's potential, bc I want someone to look at me the same way, but be realistic about it too

@djsoh4162

2 жыл бұрын

I can relate. All my relationships had been with narcissists or as of 2 years ago I learned COVERT NARC. All toxic. Now in my late 30's, I have accepted that the rare gem I'm supposed to be with will come when I least expect in due time. I think with all the access to information nowadays such as this video, there is hope! Best wishes to you!

@EMichaelBall

2 жыл бұрын

Look in your friendzone. If there’s a single friend that you have great, if not effortless, conversations with, see if you can agree, perhaps bringing it up almost casually (“if we were to be together, could we agree…?”), on kids, spending, handling in laws, life goal compatibility, etc. You may be great relationship material. Blake Lively took a long time to realize that her good friend Ryan Reynolds could be a great partner. But their relationship works better than most couples. And indeed, the best, most stable relationships are built on top of a strong friendship. Another INFJ commenter on here says he regrets “chasing what I thought I desired, rather than being with the one who gave me all I needed.” Understand the difference and integrate it into your search, which, like the other INFJ, you may feel wanting to continue after you meet someone who gives you what you need.

@wowso4

2 жыл бұрын

@@djsoh4162 why do we attract so much Narc? 😫😫😫

@commondog3956

2 жыл бұрын

@@wowso4 Absolutely agree.

@auntylinda7640

Жыл бұрын

Look in the mirror. There is the love you seek. We attract the partners we get according our vibration. Be patient, life is amazing! Much love xxx

When we can say, "I don't really need you, but I want you," then we got it. Thanks, Wenzes! ❤️

@modernman1240

2 жыл бұрын

You dont really get guys, do u?? Say that to a man n you will never get him

This INFJ is 59 and never married and I’m still looking. I don’t look very hard. I do love my single life and quiet home. I have friendships which are few but just fine for me. I don’t want any narcs, codependents, or losers. I’ll stay single till I manifest that that person who brings me that joy stability and growth. 😊 Thanks I’m a new subby.

Do I feel like it's harder for INFJs to find long-lasting and fulfilling relationships than most other types? Yes. We are rare and often misunderstood. I believe it's because we INFJ's have high standards, we are thinkers and we "walk the talk". The reason why I have been single for so long is because I have been avoiding toxicity and drama. Even though I realize I'm not perfect, I am always in a state of constantly improving myself. And being single has worked for me tremendously. I'm definitely not needy. When I do meet that one fine lady, I hope she is an INFJ as well. Her and I would take good care of one another because we would understand one another.

@robdog4095

5 ай бұрын

I'm an INFJ and I dated another INFJ and it was an understanding relationship but our attachment styles conflicted. I'm a fearful avoidant and she was anxious attachment so our compatibility was off. Attachment styles rule the roost in romantic relationships.

@lookupyourredemptiondrawsn7285

2 ай бұрын

​@robinleavy409th5 this is fascinating!!

@lookupyourredemptiondrawsn7285

2 ай бұрын

​@@robdog4095can 2 anxious style work together?

Ive been single since birth😂

"still single"? I choose to be single! What is wrong with that? Focus on enjoying the moment just being who you really are and you will be surprised by the relationships that enter your life! Embrace being an INFJ, its a good thing!

63 and single: Stay positive and attitude with gratitude!

Do you feel like it's harder for INFJs to find long-lasting and fulfilling relationships than most other types?

@DearYoungerSelf111

2 жыл бұрын

I think so - My sweetheart and I have been married for 13 years - and I still had to establish myself mentally physically & emotionally outside of my husband. That was like a knock upside the head - finding my sweetheart did not solve the issues of co-dependceny - no self awareness and no self love - I still had to climb my personal heights to wholeness and self happiness - a hell of a video Wenzes! Happy Wednesday!

@simovtransportmedia1137

2 жыл бұрын

Some people will say that the introversion is the reason why we are mostly single, but I think it's the analitical beginning that is so much into us. Analisis keeps you out of the action and that's the hardest part about INFJ relationships - how to balance your relationship with your inner voice that is so loud and deafening. In fact thats a problem in all aspects of our life and it's incredibly difficult to deal with it, it's a life long battle and the toughest thing is that the analizing keep you away from experiencing your successes. Analisis is our inner producer and yes it's great to have him for understanding the world around us, but we need to shut him down a little if we want to be part of what life can offer. Be more brave, that is what we have to be, more brave.

@dumba989

2 жыл бұрын

Slighty more than other types but it all depends on circumstances and life experiences as well. If you never had a true place to call home to build connections and networks it's difficult to begin a relationship because of trust issues and possible other things. Yes it's up to the individual in the end to get better, but the length of time it can take, combined with the daydreaming of partnerships, coming back down to Earth, getting comfortable, making one's own life interesting enough to enjoy being single, then pursuing dating, it's alot. When an INFJ does find a partner though, they definitely radiate even moreso than normally ☺️🙏🏿

@DeltaCreativeBranding

2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely, so incredibly hard to find someone aligned with me or someone who's ambitious enough to create our idealism together. However, I'm pretty comfortable with myself regardless... My ambition keeps me distracted enough from seeing my idealism be disappointed. That idealistic life I'm striving for will come one day!

@toptoks2022

2 жыл бұрын

Been single for 20 years i actually enjoy being alone .. especially when I have to pretend to fit in to society .. yeah thats sucks .. but all well it is what it is .. and plus, after many years of studying psychology..its very hard to get emotionally attached to anything anymore.. but that's life ..just a experience here on earth. .but love your content though have a blessed day 😌 💕

After about the 3 minute mark of this video I thought 'Holy moly, this is so accurate!' ...and it just continued. I think this was such a truthful and important video Wenzes. Thank you!

Wenzes, That seems to be my pattern; the infatuation phase you mentioned and then me realizing it. Then me becoming those characteristics i potentially saw in that partner. Then just moving on because i no longer related to them and i learned to embody those characteristics i was wanting from that partner. Honestly if i could clone myself and upload a copy of my consciousness to said clone; i like to think i’d have my ideal partner...is that narcissistic? It’s the one major thing i have trouble solving in my life. I want a partner, however, how can i make it work if i just keep becoming the person i’m looking for? And it’s not just with a romantic partner. It’s the same with family. I find myself becoming the family member i always wanted. The brother i always wanted. The father and mother i always wanted...it’s strange. I learn to embody those characteristics i want and then i realize i don’t need people to be those things for me because i have me...yet i still crave that human companionship. How would i begin to resolve that; keeping from reducing people to being human pets?

After 30 years of being a hopeless romantic with a clumsy/almost non-existent love life, I gave up. I accepted I was most probably never gonna find a partner and I started to focus on myself and on making other parts of my life something I can be happy about even if I'm alone. From then on I suddenly started having better romantic relationship. Not perfect, but way healthier and solid. So, yes, I totally agree with this vid😊

My last relationship lasted for 22 years. The lady I was with, was never one of my infatuations - we were introduced to each other and it worked. We worked well together. It was eventually eroded by my infatuation with another (who was never to be). Chasing what I thought I desired, rather than being with the one who gave me all I needed. I've been alone now for six years. I messed up and will likely die alone, with my infatuations. I was even infatuated with Wenzeslawa for a while. I got through that now. That is progress, of sorts...

@TheKuroSheep

2 жыл бұрын

The things about us INfJ is that sometimes I don’t know if our comments about things like death, suicide, murder are signals that we are really depressed or just small moments of pure and unfiltered truth that make you grasp REAL reality for once. But independent of the real “, something I've been able to observe while trying to find patterns aka “understand” what means to be alive it’s that: birth/emotions/past, death/mind/future and reality(life)/body/present are concepts/abstracts /meanings than can only be experienced alone. We born alone, we die alone it doesn’t matter how well un current life or how much people/money u have. This means that we shouldn’t try or be scared of end alone but rather live a lonely life without connections leading to be forgotten like your existence didn’t matter. Forme reality is the present, reality is now, reality is what other call be alive. The “ PAST YOU” from 5 seconds ago are not alive anymore, just like the FUTURE YOU from the next 5 seconds don’t exist yet because every time a second pass, a new possible second born. Before even being a fetus we had to run, fight and push foward so we could born. You already did that all by yourself and won. From that point ur reality start. Each day that die become ur yesterday, the past are graveyards of ur days and just some of them will have a tombstones that we can read/remember staying like memories. We have to die each day and use this opportunity to let the shame or guilt be killed little by little. Ur future exist every day with a infinite versions of you, it’s the prize for winning ur first battle. 22years with someone u give u what u need are 8030 days in a reality that u pick and like when u was born the things u win then u can find in yourself. Now ur are 2190 days is a reality that was born from a moment where u chase desire before other things. It’s okay, enjoy that reality mindfully , if u are not happy with that change. With each day that die let a part of the thing u don’t like die with it, each moment ur breath try to find something pretty, funny, cool, positive around you. And finally try to think at least once in a day about ur future, but not years in the future or u death. Can be tomorrow, in one hour, In ten minutes and choose something that u want, need or like. If u can’t then something that u can do to make someone feel better. Tell a friend he looks good, leave a like I’m KZread,tell mom u think she’d cool or look at the mirror and say to yourself “I’m sorry and I really love u”. For me it helped a lot with guilt, shame and depression. Make the past a tool not only to automatically remember things but also to manually erase/archive something. Make the NOW a real present, by giving the same if not more power than the past or future and by enjoying that moment because U know it will never repeat. And take power and responsibility (not guilt) of ur past self, realizing that if one messed decision can change ur life once, then imagine how many life’s u can change for better and all the realities u have yet to discover. The goal is to be infatuated by ur reality/present/life/existence so u enjoy it while also accepting the fact that it’s not forever, but it’s okay because this is the exact reason why people like presents, its good when we have it but the fun is to guess what will be inside

You released this video just in time. Everything you said is the absolute truth. and I'm really tired of making my life so good that I just forget about the possibility of entering into a relationship with someone. Im crying, thank you so much.

I'm an INFJ..I'm single. I think that I'm single because I want to get to know a man before I get into a committed relationship. Some guys just want me to strip. Some guys are jaded. To me everyone has emotional baggage. Some guys just won't answer my questions..I'm frustrated. I'm taking a time out because I feel drained. I'm working on myself. I'd like to be in a long term relationship.

I've had many failed relationships due to what you describe. I had one good loving relationship for almost two years in my early 20's n I wonder if that was it. I'll be 51 soon and at this point, I'm pretty good at being alone and single. Your videos are pretty informative n I relate to them alot. Thank you!

As for as common qualities go....I have never wanted to date myself. I'm up for the challenge, the experiences and the learning that dating someone other than myself. However, having said that, I still prefer to date someone equal, not necessarily similar and yes, there is a difference. I also have a poster in my room that reads: I'VE BEEN SINGLE FOR A WHILE AND I HAVE TO SAY IT'S GOING VERY WELL. ...IT'S WORKING OUT. I THINK I'M THE ONE.

It’s hard to love someone else when your still learning to love yourself and whole lifetime I didn’t have anyone’s back and there for others. I didn’t get the respect from partner. It’s time for myself. Feel like I’m on a mission for something out there. My experience in relationship is most toughest journey. They expect I change for them. I cannot do that. I’m being me. Soul mate not master. I would be very happiest woman if there’s another infj partner out there for me like soulmate Not another master. Last almost 10 years living alone have taught me so much. Learn to stand up, avoid drama, many many things. Faithful there’s one out there…I may be intj? Or intp?

@Introvertedalpha

2 жыл бұрын

Appreciated hearing your insights.

Finding someone that doesn't bore the crap out of me...ughh I might be waiting for another hundred years😢

This was bang on!! I have the perfect life all planned out for me and my man if he would only get on board!! :) After many years of friendship I am completely aware he is not who I want him to be. I like him anyway. But I am working very hard on creating the life I want for myself now at 62. I am still cool and want to find an "add on" not an "escape plan". I'll just keep being me and creating my life. It's a win either way! (sitting here with messy bun recovering from COVID after finally leaving the house, but I'm gonna rock this when I'm better!!!) Thanks Wenzes, you are bringing the light.

Gurrrlll...feeling that...so much...mostly wanting mental stimulation...a non-boring relationship...

Appreciate you and this message Wenzes 🙏🏼

Very helpful spot on 100% Thank you

My personal opinion is that using your ‘personality type/label’ to excuse oneself in having bad/poor/unbalanced relationships is a cop out. Here is how I met my wife. No dating apps, no friend introductions. Nothing. We met at a Starbucks. Small little chit chat led to test the waters led to deeper conversations and the rest is history. What did I bring to the table? A lot. And not shy to admit it. But, what did she bring to the table? A lot as well. If INFJ’s are so ‘intuitive’. Then they should be able to literally filter people on who they are not compatible with. Being ‘rare’ is almost always not a good thing. In fact, it’s a horrible thing. 😊

Great insight about projection and seeing potential rather than reality; thanks for sharing!

I just found this channel and I am so happy about it. I can't wait to watch all the videos. Every one I've seen so far has had my head nodding non-stop. I know I'm not crazy now...I think.

I wish I knew I was a infj in the 90s lol

Thank you for being such an honest and supportive person.

Wow wenzes divine timing as always, thank you so much for this video it's exactly what I needed right now! Keep up the beautiful work!

This is one of those eye opening videos which contains bunch of "ohhh" moments for so many infjs:))thank you

After this i knew that i am not realistic about relationships, but i will be. Thanks a lot 🙏💗💗

Damn that spoke to me so much. I was trying to make my illusions reality for 2 years with that person but now I found someone else and I finally understood all of that and wow it feels so nice to have a stable person in your life really. (I'm still single though but it's a bit complicated lol)

I feel like this couldn’t be more dead on. I’ve never heard anyone understand me and my thinking process, what it is, and what I know it should be. I immediately subscribed!💖

this is what i really needed to hear today! thank you so much!

Thanks Wenzes! your videos are always a life-saver. Truth indeed.

Once again I can relate 100%, this is definitely been my way in the past, and and honestly probably my entire life, in relation to a potential person or relationship. I had quite a bit of experience with it, before I came to that realization and self-discovery, that it just wasn't a great a realistic way, long before I even discovered myself as an infj , and subsequently, made the decision to try to avoid it, as to not set myself up for that kind of outcome. I did decide to focus on myself and create my best self before attempting that again but, a lot of things have gotten in the way of that, but I think I'm still anchored in that decision of being my best self first. Great advice 👍

I feel attacked 😩. This is so true. I recently left a long term relationship due to constant betrayal from my partner. Then I met someone and became completely infatuated. We had very similar interests. I’ve actually never met someone I had so much in common with. But it happened way too fast. Thankfully it didn’t take me as long to realize what i was doing. Now I’m single again and focusing on myself and the life I want. Thank you for this.

girl, I've now watched the whole video and man, that's probably the best advice I ever got, thanks a lot ✨🙏😌

Thank you Wenzes helped me clarify alot about what I'm currently experiencing in dating, my approach and my thought process 💜

Potentials are so much more fun than real people. Real people have to be studied and prodded. The Potential in my head always knows what I want to hear. (I understand your point of view & agree with you)

This video was definitely brought to me by divine timing. I’ve been having this experience with a certain ideal ‘friendship’ instead of a relationship with this woman I met about a year ago. She was great to me at first, but I just ended up projecting onto her which just made things messy. I really longed for a close friendship with her but she didn’t want the same - I just ended up becoming obsessed but not with her, more with the idea of our friendship. Talking to her and being in her presence made me feel how I’d always longed to feel all of my life. She ended up not being the ‘perfect’ person I hoped she’d be to fill that gap I’d been wanting to fill for so long. I’m sure things will turn out okay between us, but right now it feels messy and complicated. You’ve definitely confirmed what I’ve been realising recently about it though, so thank you. ❤️

This was intensely excellent!

Thank you for really clearly explaining what Ive been unable to talk aloud, to help see around me in the most balanced view:)) and grateful I don’t feel sooo different today

Thank you so much for making these video's ...This is something i really needed to hear out and all your videos have helped me out in a huge way .

Well, I've had this "problem" since I was 15. As a true INFJ, I find other people's feelings, which are related to me, particularly strong. Most strongly hatred and hostility with immediate rejection of the person (protective mechanism) and next sexuality and then love feelings. So just to understand, someone has enmity against me in mind and I automatically reflect on this feeling in order to analyze their true reasons. Sexuality is quite hard for me, when someone thinks sexually about me it is very very powerful for me in the sensation and then also very very confusing (why does someone think sexually about me and say nothing). Love and flirting, well hello, basically INFJs are incapable of flirting. This is because of our skills mentioned above. If there are two people in the room who find us attractive, we immediately withdraw. Why, because we don't want to hurt anyone. When I was young, this led to my inability to flirt. There were always several women present, and I always withdrew because I several women. Especially when these emotions are in the room. So in short, it's impossible to flirt with an INFJ when there's someone else in the room with feelings. It is impossible. I and all true INFJs immediately withdraw. The reason is simple, the lawyer would record the "feelings" of the disappointed person and show them to us at night. For us, like a stab in the heart. All people who flirt with INFJ in the presence of other people, it doesn't work that way. When I was young, women got together and spoke to me directly. Once four women together, you can ignore one, but not all of us. We can accept behavior that two or more women who have feelings get together. We do not accept creating pain towards someone else. It's against everything we are. That's how it happened that I had a lot of relationships with multiple women. So please again, if an INFJ wants to flirt, I'm talking about the real ones, then he has to be chameleon and turn on his extroverted function and then ask the person to come along and be alone with . In a group it wears us down.

This was definitely me in my last relationship...trying to escape my life and it all fell apart. Although, I do enjoy the intensity of getting to know someone new -- it is up to me to have that same intensity and contentment in my own life and inner world. My happiness is my responsibility, not his. Just started back dating and was okay with taking my time and not having the usual intensity. Although underwhelmed, it showed me I can be ok without the fireworks that are all in my head lol. The possibility of a relationship in the not too distant future feels great but my life is worth having that intensity for even if I have been single for so many years 😅

i feel like this video isn't just specific to infjs. It's for everyone in General. Great explanation

Wow, this video is right on and very knowledgeable.

Totally agree, no one can save you from yourself! Get to know you before trying to know someone else.

You explain this very well

Hello. I have done various tests, even several times I am a male INFJ - t. I am 33 years old men and I get along well with women, I communicate easily, but I can't commit and offer friendships in any way - all short-term friendships with girls I ever had have been initiated by themselves and I still enjoy it so far. I think that’s how they take me seriously because I hate ONS, only interested in long-term commitments. Another problem is that the relationship did not lead anywhere, because I am always miserable - I have a melancholic temperament, introvert. I'm afraid to be left in a relationship, I'm a very sticky, moody, no need to go anywhere, attentive, very calm and cheerful man, but women leave me because it feels like sometimes I am like 90 years old - I'm young but too mature, sometimes very emotional like hurracan... I like to feel safe, I don't like risk - the best for me is a "quiet corner", nature, a cat or a dog ... when I start admiring women, I get hundreds of “blocks” in my mind and start overthinking - like a fear of a love affair. I often check a woman I like - for a very long time, I watch at them. I am shy, afraid to take the first step. I have preconceptions, I don't accept certain things - I don't like free-spirited girls who are very talkative and intriguing: D But I'm a brave observer in the professional field and my "silence" when I need has overtaken many extroverted colleagues. The worst part is that situation so good for me, although it often hurts my heart, as it is easy for others to commit :) I need a guarantee, I'm looking for a long way to go. Everything else is a waste of time if the relationship comes into divorce. The weirdest thing is that I do great at work, my colleagues like me, but no one understands why such a charming man is lonely. I think I should visit a specialist, but I continue to analyze myself.

@EMichaelBall

2 жыл бұрын

You should take plenty of magnesium glycinate and at least 5,000 IU per day of Vitamin D + K2. This could provide a mood boost, and at least it has immune system benefits. From there, plenty of zinc (at least 40 mg/day) keeps the prostate smaller over time. Green tea extract (no more than 1,000 mg/day, taken with the zinc about 90-120 minutes after waking up - can replace coffee for caffeine supply) keeps the immune system further upright. After about a few weeks of that combo, Milk thistle soothes the liver against any possible long term damage from the green tea extract.

@user-vi7zh3vi5w

4 ай бұрын

You are not alone

yeah, I'm giving up on ever finding somebody and it feels kind of freeing tbh, my cousin is now almost 50, she never had a serious relationship and was intimate with one guy, who visited her shop a whole year to talk to her just to end up ditching her immediately after he got what he wanted, she's a really beautiful, independent and successful woman and I've wondered since I was little why she never found someone to marry like pretty much everyone else in my big polish family, looks like I'm gonna be the second one to stay single, I'm starting to wonder if her and I are both INFJs and tbh, I really make it hard for others to get to know me, especially since I enjoy being by myself a lot more than meeting new people. there's other blessings life has to offer though, everyone's blessed in ways others aren't, so I'm thankful for my life being fulfilling in different areas for me.

This message resonated with me very well. Actually, I learned a lot of the things you talked about when I was younger, but it didn't keep me from getting attached to the wrong people - for a lot of the reasons that you talked about in this video. I eventuality learned, but it was often painful. Even though there were lonely times, I chose to thoroughly embrace my single life and to enjoy it. I eventually designed my own social life on my "own INFJ terms" to set myself up to meet like minded people. My husband David and I married later in life, and I knew it was better that way. We knew we had met at the right time. We had a lot of important things in common and that made a huge difference. It was worth waiting for. I'm a widow now, and single again. Of course, it's a different kind of singleness, but I do know that we can live good, effective lives whether single or not.

@cmtm5108

2 жыл бұрын

I like reading your comments, sorry if that freaks you out.

@lindateuling7862

2 жыл бұрын

@@cmtm5108 I'm glad you like to read them. Not to worry - I'm not at all freaked.

@rameshcppodcasts

2 жыл бұрын

❤️❤️

@auntylinda7640

Жыл бұрын

We are here to learn. Much love 💜

This explanation is very relevant to me, and I am amazed at how you manage to express these concepts, great quality in these explanations. You are very good, speaking pragmatically, of course. 😁

I needed this video

Loving the title. 🤣☺️🤣

Dating Juliet in Gotham City is so addictive! 😂😂 The solution for me was to burn to ashes my fig tree. Yeah, the one in Sylvia Plath's Bell Jar. I'm totally comfortable in being single for life.

My family was turbulent, and my father was a narcissist. He isolated me and cut off my ties in society until I got rid of him and moved away and worked in another area and cut my ties with him. I am still unable to integrate into society. I formed relationships with some friends, but for me connection is difficult. I fell in love with a girl, but later I discovered that she is a narcissist and I moved away from her, so I think that I have no luck in marriage and engagement, and I prefer staying alone and distancing all the toxic people around me. I love myself and live only for her

Have you seen Heidi Priebe's videos on attachment style? I have wondered if anxious attachment styles are more common in INFJs. It's hard to separate sometimes what is part of my identity vs what are things I want to change. Learning more about secure attachment styles outlines some helpful goals.

First understanding that we don't need someone else to "save me" is huge. Have a deep understanding of self and setting healthy, sustainable boundaries based on what you understand of yourself. Compromise not sacrifice. It all starts with self.

Attractive INFJ females are probably the gold standard as companions. I say that from experience, years ago on a dating site. Their profiles were always the most compelling, for me. What happens though- the women, are these huge, beautiful personalities.They frequently will aim higher than their looks will accommodate. In short, the quality guys they go for have lots of options.

Thank you❤🙏

How do I overcome envy? I feel so old, overlooked, and unfulfilled, when I see another man have everything I have ever wanted in life.

@Wenzes

2 жыл бұрын

Take it as inspiration to become the man you want to be now. The exciting part is about being someone who is ACTIVELY WORKING towards the life he wants. The moment you know you are on your way…the envy goes away.

After a 3.5 yrs first marriage, mom suggested I make a list of what I really want in a mate. 20+ attributes later, #2 person hobbles into the doctor's office I worked as a nurse. He fulfilled about 2/3 of my list, and I found the other items within me! 32yrs later, we have 2 kids, 2 grandkids, and I find more and more things within myself to bring to our relationship as he grows at the pace he was meant to. Somedays, it is hard, but I go back to what you explain- How can I create the intensity that I crave? Thanks for creating these great videos for all of us INFJs, Wenzes!

I've been in 2 very serious relationships (1 was a marriage) with men who had multiple personalities. One even told me when we first started dating, that he was diagnosed with dissociative disorder, I didn't know that was the official name for multiple personalities. People think I'm crazy when I say this, but by the middle of the relationships, I realized it. Seriously, I could see them change. Someone told me that they were gaslighting me, but no that wasn't it. I've dating many narcissists and been gaslighted many times, it wasn't the same. Has this happened to anyone else 🤔? Edited: Oh and almost everyone I've dated has had some sort of eating disorder, which I thought was rare in men.🤷‍♀️

God said so 🥳

so if you want to flirt with an INFJ, talk to him!!!! No INFJ has anything against talking and it breaks the chain of empathy and scanning.

I browsed this channel out of curiosity as an ENFJ. I was shocked to identify to every one of the dozens of video I’ve watched. I took the test again and I’m still ENFJ. I see myself in the INFJ description: daydreaming, analysing everything, being drained by people even if I’m comfortable in group settings… And now this dating video. It’s all spot on. I’m blown away because Ive had therapy and coaching in the past but MBTI helps with blind spots like no other approach. And Wenzes is incredibly smart, which helps! Definitely exploring diving deeper into bootcamp and/or coaching. I’m new to MBTI, how can I have an ENFJ exterior and an INFJ interior? Thank you!

@m2pozad

2 жыл бұрын

The easy answer is you are ambivert. I had this explained to me by a 16 Personalities test advisor. I had way more confusion about having tested INTP quite a few years ago and living with that identity. Then recently testing INFJ on the 16 Personalities site. I'm still both shaken and exhilarated, since INTP did not fit at all regarding tech nerd. I've always been into people functionings, along with being analytical.

@mayw2200

2 жыл бұрын

@@m2pozad love that thanks for sharing :)

Starting to get comfortable with being alone.

Indeed...

You always bring a great insight on INFJ’s! I find you you be the most informative out there.

I'm INFJ-A woman. I don't engage random relationship in my life- certified #NBSB. Well, it's a choice. Maybe, my mind will change, hoping someday, I can find someone who agree on long-term appreciation and commitment. I'm not rushing into relationship as well. If we vibe and understand each other, that's great.

INFJs aren't chasers. If a woman is interested, hopefully she's confident enough to just approach me.

Way too hard to be like everyone else i am realizing i agree.

We must get to know others by initiating some interactions. Feeling tired is my number 1️⃣ excuse to not do that😉

Who would want to subject another To Daily SRA Targeting…Not Me…

@kcole5177

2 жыл бұрын

🎯🔥😣😌🤦FACTS!

Gurrrrrrrrrllllll I can’t find your Patreon????? You don’t have Patreon????????? ;-) love your videos! Thanks!

Thank you but i dont look for a partner now i was in for that 30 years soo now im going to love my freedom ☺️☺️yess maybee if somone comes my way but im not seeking for it ...

I am Doomed! Haha

been single most of my life - kind of sucks sometimes

As INFJ, We are Goal-Oriented, but you can take it to extreme, while ignoring you marriage mate. He or she is your co-pilot. He or she is now Part of your goal, You cannot be married and have single mindset, your waiting for emotional explosion to happen. Being married, it takes two to make work, Not my way or the highway, because your taking on more responsibility by accepting the Love of my life, your partner You cannot have single mindset and have your cake and eat it, quit being selfish, Being married, you have to cater to each other needs And that includes sexually. There’s is a saying what good is a gun if can’t shoot it, What good is a beautiful car and can’t find keys to Drive it, It doesn’t take Rocket scientist to figure this one out. The illustration is , it two to make it work.

Are we that pessimistic or traumatic or just clueless about love or just idealize partners? But, I think we sweat on small stuff that becomes overwhelming. I am looking for a partner I can bond safely on a soul level. I hope to be with someone I can be happy with most of the time. Life is serious, but love shouldn't be that heavy, its supposed to help you unload, to look at the brighter side, to be inspired despite the impermanence of things.

Wow! I am single INFJ from east but i don't know about main reason ( may be some idleness )

Hey winzes I wanna purchase your audio course how can I do that??? And I want your coaching .

@Wenzes

2 жыл бұрын

Sign up in the link in the description. The Audiocourse comes out May 15th!

That's the plan mastering all the Emotions good and bad ones

I have never been single until a year and a half ago. Because I choose to work on myself creating the life I want and how I want to feel. And have not even tried to find a relationship yet. When I am done with myself then I will start looking. The reason why I am never single is because very young I learned that I am very extreme and most people are not. So i don't put the expectations the same as I put on myself. I call it down grading myself to there standards but it the problem is my surroundings think they can drop my own standerds of how I choose to push myself. And that creating a issue with me and that's when I kick every one out of my life. I gave the respect to them when I think there extremeness is weak I expect the same thing back respect my choice to be extreme with myself it's not bothering anyone.

Thank you for mentioning Romeo and Juliet...because I can relate I'm in love with these types of love stories. But in the reality, they are dangerous and insane

So when it came to flirting with me, I experienced it again and again - successfully - that two women got together or, alternatively, talked a lot on the phone and texted on WhatsApp. Otherwise it will be difficult.

Did someone say, INFJ. Reporting in. Just remember, are personality is the same as the most famous INFJ, Itachi Uchiha. However we are all unique. ^_^ ❤

@mosesunic9535

Жыл бұрын

Gxng shit

Who would that person be? Someone to accept that my SE is important, yet inferior function. Yea, the search continues, lol.

Hmmmmm. Well that explains the last 20 or so years of my life. It's been 2 decades since I've even held a lady's hand. Through the perspective of hindsight, all I can say is...wow.

Not everything.My ideal partner would not be so much work.

Just not that good at speaking at first, but I am actually and excellent professional speaker. Some reasons are due to others ignoring, our words ain’t fake flattering and don’t like dance, so the connection is not like others who dance. I can dance but not my idea of fun! I have met some beautiful women before and lot of them spark the conversation sometimes. I would always mess it up by texting garbage I guess or being too nice In their mind. Better of just saying come over! When I was younger I was the Mac Daddy, now I suck or maybe they think I’m too handsome/ look serious and token I don’t know, plus since it can be hard to say the right things, never leads anywhere! 😂, I still have friends pop up once in while and some stick around longer, until my simple pet peeves kick in of ignoring or lying, but no big deal! I look back and sometimes I blame alcohol because it can be my kriptonite and causes me to not text the right things, not really mean things just stupid I guess! Plus bigger crowds sometimes is too much, and I don’t go out really no more because not drinking and was usually a waste!

Umm

There is no match that can meet my seriousness. That's why I down grade myself or I just do my think and not care