Rome Total War Is A Perfectly Balanced Game With No Exploits

Ойындар

Welcome to Rome Total War a brilliant strategy where players are expected to expand the roman empire or dominate the sea and trade as Carthage. You can build giant armies of gladiator units, elephants and Persian cataphracts. Now we are going to go up against the barbarians of gaul and legions of rome but with a little challenge! But we will be playing as the british / britons today and using only peasant units! These peasant units are the single WORST UNIT in the entire game. They will flee at the first sign of combat but we will somehow use them to conquer rome and maybe do a world conquest using the worst unit in the game only. I have done archer only runs and sycthian horse only runs but no today this is going to be something special!
steam description: Total War: ROME REMASTERED lets you relive the legacy that defined the award-winning strategy game series. Remastered to 4K with multiple improvements to visuals as well as refinements to gameplay, it’s time to revisit a true classic. Not everyone gets a second chance to conquer the Roman Empire.
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title: Rome Total War Is A Perfectly Balanced Game With No Exploits
chapters:
00:00 - Intro
01:51 - The British Faction!
03:20 - Our setup
05:09 - Our First Fight!
08:31 - The British Horde
10:55 - Nighttime Massacre!
16:37 - Enter the Romans!
17:55 - The Grate War!
20:56 - Attacking the Romans!
22:33 - The fall of Rome
24:26 - Outro & Thanks for Watching!
#game #funny #war

Пікірлер: 1 300

  • @thespiffingbrit
    @thespiffingbrit10 ай бұрын

    *I am sure the developers perfectly balanced the games auto resolve to factor in how weak peasants are relative to unit size...*

  • @andrewphillips8341

    @andrewphillips8341

    10 ай бұрын

    We aren't you saluting the King?

  • @Kingdom_Cow

    @Kingdom_Cow

    10 ай бұрын

    For the Yorkshire Empire!!!

  • @theflamedragon2508

    @theflamedragon2508

    10 ай бұрын

    I love that you aren't saluting the king lol Things heating up in the british fandom

  • @kendog3419

    @kendog3419

    10 ай бұрын

    Ngl didn't know this was uploaded 30 min ago thought it said 30 days XD

  • @ctg4818

    @ctg4818

    10 ай бұрын

    A design choice (numbers > stats) that is in just about every single Total War game lol

  • @danielhale1
    @danielhale110 ай бұрын

    Spiff: They're affordable! Spiff: They're replaceable! Spiff: They're highly expendable! Me: I wish you wouldn't call me out like that

  • @AcornFox

    @AcornFox

    10 ай бұрын

    easy just be landed gentry duh

  • @_Ciosu..

    @_Ciosu..

    10 ай бұрын

    No

  • @crissdace8358

    @crissdace8358

    10 ай бұрын

    @@AcornFox i literally learned what a landed gentry was like a week ago I'm pretty sure I forgot but isn't that an insult ?

  • @-NxPx-Phoenix

    @-NxPx-Phoenix

    10 ай бұрын

    @@crissdace8358 in british english anything can be insult if you say it right, you absolute kettle.

  • @aaaaahhhhh9885

    @aaaaahhhhh9885

    10 ай бұрын

    ​@@crissdace8358nah it's just the people who own land/nobles

  • @No.00000
    @No.0000010 ай бұрын

    "An army of sheep led by a lion is better than an army of lions led by a sheep." ~ true brexit geezer

  • @slvrshore5300

    @slvrshore5300

    10 ай бұрын

    so... based?

  • @insaniam_convertunt_scientiam

    @insaniam_convertunt_scientiam

    10 ай бұрын

    And correct. It’s bad for morale if the troops eat the General.

  • @googiegress7459

    @googiegress7459

    10 ай бұрын

    @@insaniam_convertunt_scientiam Well it's certainly not great for the general's morale.

  • @XtreeM_FaiL

    @XtreeM_FaiL

    10 ай бұрын

    @@insaniam_convertunt_scientiam are you sure? Italians seemed to do great after they killed Mussolini.

  • @TheTyke

    @TheTyke

    10 ай бұрын

    Although the Romans actually stated that the average Briton farmer, let alone warrior was larger and stronger than the average legionary. And was trained in combat at a very young age regardless of their role in society. In terms of individual strength and talent, the Britons far surpassed the Romans. What the Romans did was use mass produced, uniform equipment and training, and political maneuvering (Divide and Conquer). As Tacitus (Agricola 21) said, the Romans could not defeat the Britons militarily, so they introduced them to convenience and vice, and their luxury became their slavery.

  • @PinataFreaks
    @PinataFreaks10 ай бұрын

    "You see, Killbots have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I sent wave after wave of my own men at them, until they reached their limit and shutdown. Kif, show them the medal I won." - Zapp Brannigan

  • @springpurse

    @springpurse

    4 ай бұрын

    "Some of you may die, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make"

  • @XtreeM_FaiL
    @XtreeM_FaiL10 ай бұрын

    -What are your orders, sir? -Kill their strongest units and the rest will run away! -Sir! Enemy doesn't have any strong units. -Wait what?

  • @nehcrum

    @nehcrum

    10 ай бұрын

    Well, as we saw, it did work, when they killed Spiffs general.

  • @Yamato-wx1mo
    @Yamato-wx1mo10 ай бұрын

    You clearly haven't seen the best offer the AI does in this game Our offers: Please don't attack us Their offers: Accept or we will attack

  • @simey5639

    @simey5639

    10 ай бұрын

    I think that's fixed in the remaster

  • @Gingerninja800

    @Gingerninja800

    10 ай бұрын

    isn't that just a non aggression pact

  • @leadpaintchips9461

    @leadpaintchips9461

    10 ай бұрын

    @@simey5639 Not fixed last I saw, plenty of screenshots of the remaster having it a bit after release.

  • @DeadObserver

    @DeadObserver

    10 ай бұрын

    It is such a good offer that even I as a true diplomat myself use it in some rare circumstances!

  • @stevenwebb3475

    @stevenwebb3475

    10 ай бұрын

    ​@@leadpaintchips9461yeah but you can turn on the old diplomatic AI.

  • @TheArklyte
    @TheArklyte10 ай бұрын

    Spiff, destroying Roman Empire by using civilians with shivs: how oddly british... P.S.: I have a feeling that the "real" representation of battles would have been all roman legionaries being simply mugged in the night.

  • @tturi2

    @tturi2

    10 ай бұрын

    they'd get shived for their shoes

  • @TheArklyte

    @TheArklyte

    10 ай бұрын

    @@tturi2 "I just want some shoes"

  • @topkek996

    @topkek996

    10 ай бұрын

    Should have attacked a day after a football game when the grugs are all hungover

  • @roxxdudeplayswow

    @roxxdudeplayswow

    10 ай бұрын

    Let's go mug 'em!!!!!!

  • @aaronbates4848

    @aaronbates4848

    10 ай бұрын

    @@roxxdudeplayswow Hey! Gimme that gold or I'll mug ya!

  • @johnjo6315
    @johnjo631510 ай бұрын

    Imagine being an elite soldier, trained only by the best and in an army of equally qualified and equally elite comrades and somehow you guys fight the average farmer armed with nothing but a rusted sword and the clothes on their back… and get absolutely manhandled

  • @ashenmask5301

    @ashenmask5301

    10 ай бұрын

    Every "h" work featuring elves vs orcs/goblins

  • @alexturnbackthearmy1907

    @alexturnbackthearmy1907

    10 ай бұрын

    I mean...there are billons of them and only few of yours. You kill one and 1000 men take his place and rob you from all your weapon and armor.

  • @sjs9698

    @sjs9698

    10 ай бұрын

    @@alexturnbackthearmy1907 iirc ther romans managed to win vs ~100-1 odds against the horde B. brought to try & retake britain & they weren't (all) peasants ^^

  • @alexturnbackthearmy1907

    @alexturnbackthearmy1907

    10 ай бұрын

    @@sjs9698 I meant game-wise. Its like a zerg horde, but with people, nightmare stuff.

  • @XenoEagle

    @XenoEagle

    10 ай бұрын

    @@alexturnbackthearmy1907 Agree, being trained should help, but that's the exact scenario of being good at self-defense. Say you can easily defend yourself vs someone with even a knife. But then, there are 5 of them. Well that's that. You died. Unless we talk about stuff like tanks vs cave-men, training won't make you invincible.

  • @vinne6837
    @vinne683710 ай бұрын

    Ah, yes, the timeless tactic of throwing endless amounts of under supplied combatants at your enemy

  • @hungrymusicwolf

    @hungrymusicwolf

    10 ай бұрын

    Usually a Russian specialty but today replicated by the Britons.

  • @ravingcuriosity6345

    @ravingcuriosity6345

    10 ай бұрын

    @@hungrymusicwolf hahaha I was about to say something like "Welcome to Russia" hahaha

  • @aydenlegleiter7810

    @aydenlegleiter7810

    10 ай бұрын

    @@ravingcuriosity6345 was about to type something to the effect of 'the russian technique'

  • @Zeitgeist2000

    @Zeitgeist2000

    10 ай бұрын

    It worked in korea

  • @Almond19912

    @Almond19912

    6 ай бұрын

    The Moscow special

  • @TheCulturedSwine
    @TheCulturedSwine10 ай бұрын

    Missed opportunity of naming the “Dude printer” that produces tons of peasants ; better name: Pez Dispenser

  • @googiegress7459

    @googiegress7459

    10 ай бұрын

    Just wonderful.

  • @teo8279
    @teo827910 ай бұрын

    Gauls be like : " Accept our demand or we will attack " Their demands : " Please do not attack "

  • @teebob21

    @teebob21

    10 ай бұрын

    Never change, France, never change.

  • @greywolf7577

    @greywolf7577

    9 ай бұрын

    I think it makes sense. Basically it is saying "If you attack us, we will attack you back".

  • @Kerenskyz15

    @Kerenskyz15

    7 ай бұрын

    It is just a Peace Treaty with extra steps. Big stick diplomacy.

  • @sokandueler9578
    @sokandueler957810 ай бұрын

    “17,000 people are about to discover what the definition of a war crime is” This had me rolling 😂😂

  • @normalhuman9878

    @normalhuman9878

    5 ай бұрын

    Technically the Geneva Conventions didn’t exist yet

  • @Poweraded
    @Poweraded10 ай бұрын

    He’s back with another amazing total war game never thought I’d live to see this again

  • @gijsjanssen8965

    @gijsjanssen8965

    10 ай бұрын

    Why

  • @IdentifiantE.S

    @IdentifiantE.S

    10 ай бұрын

    It's just so cool , it would have been criminal not to make another one.

  • @incognitoman3656

    @incognitoman3656

    10 ай бұрын

    Total War: Crimes

  • @trentparrish9401

    @trentparrish9401

    10 ай бұрын

    I was watching his older total war videos when this came out I thought I had a break from reality. I even reread the title thinking I was reading what I wanted to see or something. I found this channel three months ago and have been binging through all his videos and have liked every video and even bought a few of the games he’s showed as I found myself liking the game.

  • @joshalmighty1901

    @joshalmighty1901

    10 ай бұрын

    IF YOU DONT LIKE IT DONT WATCH IT! AS FOR US TEA DRINKERS, WE CANT WAIT!!!

  • @jordanhooper1527
    @jordanhooper152710 ай бұрын

    Love this game, currently destroying the Romans as Britain. I managed to kill 1100 Romans with 6 heavy chariot units losing only 75men

  • @jackhazardous4008

    @jackhazardous4008

    10 ай бұрын

    75 man for one experienced kill? Now that's a trade deal!

  • @resileaf9501

    @resileaf9501

    10 ай бұрын

    Chariots are quite OP in Rome 1. Literally can chain rout an entire army in seconds.

  • @ThePastaSawce

    @ThePastaSawce

    10 ай бұрын

    *me crying in Latin*

  • @antares4975

    @antares4975

    10 ай бұрын

    @@ThePastaSawce mama mia?

  • @ThePastaSawce

    @ThePastaSawce

    10 ай бұрын

    @@antares4975 Mi Cannoli!

  • @budwyzer77
    @budwyzer7710 ай бұрын

    Chariots were SUPER overpowered in Rome: Total War's autoresolve so your general unit probably did a lot of the heavy lifting. That's why Britain and Egypt always took over their sections of the map.

  • @VoyageurCountry

    @VoyageurCountry

    10 ай бұрын

    True but they were also hot trash that exploded at the sight of arrows and javelins

  • @budwyzer77

    @budwyzer77

    10 ай бұрын

    @@VoyageurCountry Not in autoresolve. In general chariots were pretty useless beyond scaring infantry and annihilating cavalry. Chariots mostly just knocked infantry down but cavalry lacked any means of getting back up.

  • @nehcrum

    @nehcrum

    10 ай бұрын

    @@budwyzer77 Because Rome:Total War (and several other TW-titles since then) had a rock-paper-scissors approach, with spearmen countering cavalry etc. And chariots against spearmen, or even worse, chariots charging into the front of a phalanx, is just a quick slaughter. But the autoresolve just gives an arbitrary value to a unit, regardless of composition and counters. Hence, chariots are very powerful, in autoresolve, as counters don't count. Same thing here with the peasants. Experience levels up their melee attack and melee defence. But they have no shields and little armour, which aren't affected by experience, so the counter is ranged missiles, which will cut them down (the counter to ranged is shields), but again, those things don't count in autoresolve. And peasants, having the weakest stats, of course benefits the most from fixed bonuses.

  • @An0niem4

    @An0niem4

    3 ай бұрын

    Not only in autoresolve. I've had some absolutely incredible wins with the chariot-phalanx combo de Seleucids bring. Only a military genius can win this battle? Bring it. How I would defeat hordes of peasants? Some outstretched units of cheap phalanxes stretched out to fully join together in a continuous line blocking off a corner (or a full hexagon somewhere on the map) and the chariots running around, inflicting casualties, causing panic and keeping moving. As long as Seleucid chariots are not bogged down, they're invulnerable to anything without spears. If your chariots get tired, withdraw behind the phalanxes to rest. Peasants simply do not have the weight/armor to push through even a thin line of pikemen. With no chance of attacking from the rear, they will not get through. With a heavy cavalry general, you could sacrifice the bodyguard to break through, but guess what, this doesn't work with chariots, they die on impact. Both the phalanx and chariot are only defeated if you make a mistake. If you pay attention, you can rout armies with them.

  • @PreviewAvailable

    @PreviewAvailable

    3 ай бұрын

    Yes, in retrospect, the chariot general was probably doing most of the work. They are completely obscenely overpowered and in VH/VH they are a menace that can solo your army. The minute his general died, everything fell apart.

  • @7rich79
    @7rich7910 ай бұрын

    Who could have known that peasants and zerglings had so much in common?

  • @johnianbarete3085

    @johnianbarete3085

    10 ай бұрын

    Because they are the zerg swarm

  • @quintus6081
    @quintus608110 ай бұрын

    This makes me remember the days when I conquered half of Europe with my legendary "Belenus the Conqueror". This game makes you so much intrigued with your generals career.

  • @Tahulrik
    @Tahulrik10 ай бұрын

    In the original game i once had the brilliant German ai send a diplomat with the terms of something along the lines of 'recieve 23 denarii, accept or we will attack' A truly outstanding move !

  • @KeljuIvan

    @KeljuIvan

    10 ай бұрын

    It was probably some kind of money laundering operation.

  • @steemlenn8797

    @steemlenn8797

    10 ай бұрын

    I prefer the cases were they declare war on you and one turn later pay you money for peace. Several times in a row.

  • @whyjnot420
    @whyjnot42010 ай бұрын

    Back when the original game first came out one day I decided to do a small reconnaissance in force with a group of 3 or 4 cavalry units (the lowest of the Roman ones, likely was Julii) and decided to autoresolve everything. It took something like 10 battles without any reinforcements before they were finally defeated. No named unit, no upgrades, only the experience gained from the battles themselves. Near the end something like 20 people were defeating armies of several hundreds.

  • @Anomaly188

    @Anomaly188

    10 ай бұрын

    @@user-sj9mj3bf2m In the tabletop scene they call that "Tarpitting." It's a useful tactic to bog down the opposing HQ (Hero) unit and his guard contingent with cheap blobs of fodder while you deal with other units.

  • @nehcrum

    @nehcrum

    10 ай бұрын

    @@Anomaly188 As well as hammer-and-anvil tactics. Have a hard unit hold the enemy in place and then hit them in the back with something heavy.

  • @richardfarrer5616
    @richardfarrer561610 ай бұрын

    If it worked for Boudicca in Colchester, I see no reason it wouldn't work for Spiff in Rome.

  • @HideyoshiKinoshita84

    @HideyoshiKinoshita84

    10 ай бұрын

    Massacre and genocide civilians only to get absolutely curbstomped when facing a prepared actual army?

  • @Noble6Espeo

    @Noble6Espeo

    10 ай бұрын

    I was about to make thi comment, you beat me too it and I tip my hat to ye

  • @RaDeus87
    @RaDeus8710 ай бұрын

    I guess they changed the population thing due to the population-moving feature: recruit dirt-cheap pop-heavy units in one town, and then disband them in a city you want to grow. It's really useful early on, when you can power-level your new cities with just a few units of peasants (like Segesta and/or Patavium if you play Julii) from your main settlements. Late game it's more useful to let a city rebel just so you can enslave them. It really keeps the squalor down 👍

  • @korub1

    @korub1

    10 ай бұрын

    Idk why they changed this tbh. It’s not like it’s ahistorical for there to be mass migrations, and balance-wise it feels more like a strategy game micromanagement tool than an exploit

  • @LordVader1094

    @LordVader1094

    10 ай бұрын

    I love when games take away mechanics and options from me instead of adding more :)

  • @czarkusa2018

    @czarkusa2018

    10 ай бұрын

    They CHANGED the POPULATION SYSTEM? Is there ANYTHING Creative Assembly won't intentionally destroy just to spite long time fans of older games?

  • @doctorfrohman5516

    @doctorfrohman5516

    10 ай бұрын

    It’s optional

  • @RaDeus87

    @RaDeus87

    10 ай бұрын

    @@doctorfrohman5516 I haven't played the remake, so this is good to know. I was kinda surprised that it wasn't a thing in TW-Warhammer.

  • @GoErikTheRed
    @GoErikTheRed10 ай бұрын

    I think my favorite cheese campaign I did was as the Egyptians. No units, only generals. Egyptian chariots are a little OP in melee, but they also have the range and speed of horse archers, so you can kite indefinitely. I basically sent diplomats all over the world bribing generals then using said generals to take out entire enemy armies. With no army to maintain I was swimming in money

  • @padmanabhanvaidyanathan7182

    @padmanabhanvaidyanathan7182

    10 ай бұрын

    Chariots in general were OP in Rome 1.

  • @pocpic
    @pocpic10 ай бұрын

    "Cheekily enslaving" is the classic British modus operandi of occupation.

  • @smokinggnu6584
    @smokinggnu658410 ай бұрын

    I remember wayyy back in the day playing the original version of this game. Had a city that revolted and the rebel army that occupied it was a full stack of peasants. Except the peasants had full experience (9 tiers) and full weapons and armour (gold for both). I attacked it with my best army in range of roman heavy infantry, laid siege... and my legionnaires got absolutely slaughtered on the walls as they climbed up the siege towers by all these peasants. Total war games, man.

  • @AlliedX
    @AlliedX10 ай бұрын

    It feels as though he's still uploading 😥 R.I.P. The Spiffing Brit 1283 - 2023 You will be missed

  • @thespiffingbrit

    @thespiffingbrit

    10 ай бұрын

    Cant Believe I died

  • @Black-iv1rl

    @Black-iv1rl

    10 ай бұрын

    R.I.P he lived a long life

  • @theflamedragon2508

    @theflamedragon2508

    10 ай бұрын

    R.I.P. Cant believe he died SMH my head

  • @insaniam_convertunt_scientiam

    @insaniam_convertunt_scientiam

    10 ай бұрын

    RIP. I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter

  • @googiegress7459

    @googiegress7459

    10 ай бұрын

    @@insaniam_convertunt_scientiam ~spread~

  • @pyrrhusofepirus8491
    @pyrrhusofepirus849110 ай бұрын

    One thing that I remember that is broken in Rome Total War, and I don’t know if they’ve changed it, is how experience works. With every experience point, they gain 1 attack point. That means a fully experienced unit has *9 more attack* then a inexperienced unit. It was amazing seeing what it’d do with Praetorians.

  • @MrDwarfpitcher

    @MrDwarfpitcher

    10 ай бұрын

    There are other bonuses. It increases defensive skill and morale. Ranged units are also slightly more accurate in direct fire

  • @Hellscream_9999
    @Hellscream_999910 ай бұрын

    Spiff: "...the German AI is just truly fantastic..." Me: remembering that time the German AI bought a lump of coal from the Brit for 100 gold Me: yup, that checks out.

  • @paulmaddison6193
    @paulmaddison619310 ай бұрын

    'First we deal with the French'. As any distinguished British chap naturally would. Good show old bean! 🧐

  • @barrybend7189
    @barrybend718910 ай бұрын

    A strategy game should allow peasant units to be upgraded to speciallized units for a cheaper price. It would be an interesting mechanic.

  • @mute1085

    @mute1085

    10 ай бұрын

    Mount and Blade allows just that, although you also need them to get some experience first

  • @googiegress7459

    @googiegress7459

    10 ай бұрын

    Civ 4 does this. Presumably you'd have to pay the difference in cost and time between the two unit types in order to upgrade. Which means it isn't a way to get strong units cheaper, just a way to not let the value stored in early units go to waste.

  • @countinwermsuwu

    @countinwermsuwu

    10 ай бұрын

    Battle for Wesnoth has that, definitely worth checking out

  • @DrexSux

    @DrexSux

    10 ай бұрын

    @@mute1085I was about to say… Bannerlord much?

  • @ShinForgotPassxXx

    @ShinForgotPassxXx

    10 ай бұрын

    WoC have this mechanic in WH3. IT is pretty great.

  • @heavyarms55
    @heavyarms5510 ай бұрын

    "What if the zombie apocalypse happened during the Roman era and what if the zombies had leadership" - What this video really is.

  • @abs_nobody
    @abs_nobody10 ай бұрын

    I see that spiff is applying ancient (and more recent) continental tactics of "throw more people than weapons at the enemy"

  • @LordWyatt
    @LordWyatt10 ай бұрын

    I saw an unfinished challenge where someone tried to overwhelm/route enemy armies with (Egyptian) peasants only and it was awesome. I’m glad you’re doing a very similar challenge😎👌

  • @totalwar1793

    @totalwar1793

    10 ай бұрын

    Yeah, Legend of Total War lmao

  • @FuhqEwe

    @FuhqEwe

    10 ай бұрын

    You didn’t think he came up with his video ideas on his own did you? They’re just recreations of ideas and videos from years ago.

  • @ctg4818
    @ctg481810 ай бұрын

    Back when every single faction wasn't a $20-30 DLC. The good days.

  • @insaniam_convertunt_scientiam

    @insaniam_convertunt_scientiam

    10 ай бұрын

    I get drip feeding new content. It makes sense and when done correctly keep a game alive for years more than normal. Of course, smart companies don’t overcharge just because they can. That’s begging for some upstart to knock them out. Paradox will learn when they need to learn it.

  • @FuhqEwe

    @FuhqEwe

    10 ай бұрын

    Facts. It’s appalling that they would create the finished product, then deliberately remove content from it and try to sell it to you for more. It was _not_ add-on content that they made after the fact. That’d be like paying full price for a pizza only to discover 4 slices are missing. When you ask, they say you can have it for an additional charge. Hell, these scumbags even want to charge for the option to turn on blood. That used to be a regular option you could toggle. What will they try next? An additional fee if you want to play in a resolution above 720?

  • @e33d90

    @e33d90

    3 ай бұрын

    @@insaniam_convertunt_scientiamgood games survived without drip feeding bullshit, bad games need to drip feed to keep the sheeple on their dopamine high

  • @Edzward
    @Edzward10 ай бұрын

    If it is Spiff asking me, I have my doubts in who would win, a Giant Death Robot, or a Peasant armed with a pitchfork... 😂

  • @nehcrum

    @nehcrum

    10 ай бұрын

    Easy. The giant death robot. But the question, who would win between a giant death robot and an unlimited number of peasants, armed or unarmed. It's all about numbers. The robot may have higher stats, but quantity is a quality in itself.

  • @Orncaex
    @Orncaex10 ай бұрын

    Omfg I lost it when i saw the peasants flooding out of the gates and the AI instantly started panicking XD This is perhaps the most realistic response I've ever seen from an AI

  • @marvomaniac318
    @marvomaniac31810 ай бұрын

    I still fondly remember a playthrough as the Seleucids back in the day in the original in which I'd just buy off every city and enemy army. Conquered the entire map without ever fighting a single battle. :D

  • @dread8841

    @dread8841

    10 ай бұрын

    You don't need to fight if you are rich

  • @matthill5426
    @matthill542610 ай бұрын

    Spiff should set his capital city in Somerset, England. Clearly, high quality British cheese is the fuel for his empire-building engine. Meanwhile, only Yorkshire Gold tea can grease the cogs of total Imperial hegemony! Tea & cheddar cheese, that's the key. And the occasional cucumber sandwiches. Cucumbers are the pistons in this engine of military and economic domination. :)

  • @davidtitanium22
    @davidtitanium2210 ай бұрын

    a timeless classic, i've sunk hundreds of hours into this game in middle school

  • @MrSkysenGames
    @MrSkysenGames10 ай бұрын

    Enemy: "We have highly trained warriors, archers, horsemen, and strong fortifications." Spiff: "I have peasants." Enemy: "...What are your demands?"

  • @n.henzler50
    @n.henzler5010 ай бұрын

    "Give everyone a stick and throw them into the grinder" is somehow the most British thing you've ever done.

  • @OneJazzyBoye
    @OneJazzyBoye10 ай бұрын

    Bro is playing as the Skaven in RTW.

  • @Hyper_Fox06
    @Hyper_Fox0610 ай бұрын

    When Spiff said "because the British like things challenging" i thought he was gonna make a crack about British food. 😂

  • @Hyper_Fox06

    @Hyper_Fox06

    3 ай бұрын

    @@Mickyway I've seen stationed in England, they do have some nice food, I was just making a joke. While I don't understand beans on toast it's still pretty good

  • @FlashMan16NG
    @FlashMan16NG10 ай бұрын

    "Salute the Union Jack Flag." He knows what he's doing, he knows that line will deliberately annoy a lot of pedantic people out there. Allow me to sit back with my cuppa and watch them get annoyed.

  • @Doc_Tar
    @Doc_Tar10 ай бұрын

    Watching this game get the heck exploited out of it reminds me of how much enjoyed playing "Rome Total War" back in the day. Hail, Emperor Spiff.

  • @DudeMcGuybro
    @DudeMcGuybro10 ай бұрын

    It's true, I wasn't born, I was printed at a Spiffing Brit spawn point.

  • @wispyartist7953
    @wispyartist795310 ай бұрын

    “An army of sheep led by a lion is better than an army of lions led by a sheep.” ― Alexander the Great

  • @sjs9698

    @sjs9698

    10 ай бұрын

    yes but also no: see the british army, for most of our empire's history it was 'lions led by donkeys'.

  • @Dong_Harvey

    @Dong_Harvey

    10 ай бұрын

    "I think my horse is gay." -- Alexander the Great

  • @bobbobberson1923

    @bobbobberson1923

    10 ай бұрын

    I know where my bet is on this fight

  • @questionmaker5666

    @questionmaker5666

    10 ай бұрын

    @@sjs9698 The Duke of Marlborough, Duke of Wellington, General James Wolfe, and others would disagree. Even then the donkeys were often brave.

  • @Balsiefen
    @Balsiefen10 ай бұрын

    10:40 Damn, Spiff doesn't fall for Danegeld-strats. Britain could've used him in the 700s AD

  • @allenhollstein8820
    @allenhollstein88203 ай бұрын

    So to summarize, as you said being attacked by a peasant is like having a soft breeze being blown in your general direction. So then it stands to reason that being attacked by ALLLLLL the peasants is like being struck by a hurricane. Well done my good man.

  • @patnor7354
    @patnor735410 ай бұрын

    Hey, the "give us money or we will attack" worked quite well for the vikings against the brits ;)

  • @callum105

    @callum105

    10 ай бұрын

    "gimme all your gold or i'll mug ya"

  • @MooshroomBrosGaming
    @MooshroomBrosGaming10 ай бұрын

    10/10 historically accurate peasant uprising!!!

  • @tempusavatar
    @tempusavatar10 ай бұрын

    Thanks for the video. I met a Brit this week, and I asked about Yorkshire Tea; they reprimanded me and correctly opined that Yorkshire Gold is the Superior product.

  • @oscarxkee7921
    @oscarxkee792110 ай бұрын

    He's gone from saluting the portrait of the Queen to saluting the Union Jack 👀

  • @lewiscoe4941
    @lewiscoe494110 ай бұрын

    Ah the Bude tunnel, I didn't realise this iconic landmark in my hometown was so famous!

  • @ppunion
    @ppunion10 ай бұрын

    To be fair. A pointy stick is pretty damn good. And if that stick gets a pointy metal part it just becomes so absolute badass.

  • @Soccer_lover986
    @Soccer_lover98610 ай бұрын

    Holy crap, I thought this was an old video for a second. I’m glad you are back to total war!

  • @Jadriam
    @Jadriam10 ай бұрын

    "Some of you may die, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make."

  • @-BTE-
    @-BTE-10 ай бұрын

    When my brother told about a man who preached tea and exploited games, I couldn't believe it as I didn't believe tea was that good. But the Spiffing Brit opened my eyes to the way of tea. No he did not threaten my family with tea for this I totally wrote this with my own free will. Praise the tea.

  • @scobra5941

    @scobra5941

    3 ай бұрын

    Have you tied the scones, old boy?

  • @neilbrideau8520
    @neilbrideau852010 ай бұрын

    Having played way too much Rome TW I finally understand what happened when I lost autoresolve battles against my high level Roman units. That is like a 20 year old mystery resolved.

  • @mfrfauzirahman
    @mfrfauzirahman10 ай бұрын

    "You no farm, you go war." - The faction leader to every single peasant, probably

  • @jazzingpanda3190
    @jazzingpanda319010 ай бұрын

    I feel like this is an alternate history where the Celts (Welsh, Cornish and Bretons) succeeded in repelling the Romans. Kinda crazy that the Anglo Saxons (Germans, later becoming “english”) essentially got gifted the land after the dismemberment of the Celtic nation by the Romans. This video literally plays out the timeline that should have been. A true Celtic nation together under one flag ruling over the british isles.

  • @Tigran-Abazyan

    @Tigran-Abazyan

    2 ай бұрын

    The problem of brittonic celts are their fragmentation. There is no single political entity in Britain that coud oppose Anglo-Saxon-Jute-Frisian invasion from Germany.

  • @mtndewfan66
    @mtndewfan6610 ай бұрын

    3:54 so you need a blacksmith to make weapons and a weaponsmith to make armor? It just makes sense

  • @irrelevant_noob

    @irrelevant_noob

    10 ай бұрын

    Eh, from the description, they both increase both weapon and armour, but WS being the 2nd it therefore makes "better armour". 🤓

  • @Dragoon-zs8vm
    @Dragoon-zs8vm10 ай бұрын

    Its a good day when Spiff uploads.

  • @scaaarx
    @scaaarx10 ай бұрын

    Only just found your channel and I am loving it! this was great!

  • @elijahoconnell
    @elijahoconnell10 ай бұрын

    my khergit strategy in warband is essentially zerg (zhergit lol) peasant forces primarily being khergits and specialized garrisons worth of a full partys worth of x type of unit scattered around the map. this would allow me to grab a chunk of trained soldiers to replinish any forces with or to save on travel speed but still grow larger and have a large defense in my cities

  • @ianking7511
    @ianking751110 ай бұрын

    I remember playing this back in the day, and noticing that the germanic peasant unit is actually a phalanx. Phalanxes in RTW are more or less completely unkillable from the front, so there was much fun to be had playing a german campaign and just making big spiky peasant squares for enemy armies to break themselves on.

  • @archiebellega956

    @archiebellega956

    10 ай бұрын

    Pretty sure it's greek, and it's their equivalent of town watch (2nd weakest unit after peasant). Yeah that thing is defensive powerhouses. In some run you can defend syracuse early on even though beginner guide rightfully told you to give up syracuse and rebuild from mainland greece.

  • @ianking7511

    @ianking7511

    10 ай бұрын

    @@archiebellega956 After a little searching I've come to the conclusion that the german spears were removed from the game at some point, probably because they were entirely, hilariously broken vs ai. There are a few ancient references on various forums, circa 2004. Alternatively, I may be misremembering Attila.

  • @be12

    @be12

    10 ай бұрын

    @@ianking7511 The German warband (what you get from the base tier muster field - ie what would be town watch for the Romans) is a phalanx unit, and as dangerous if not more than the Greek Hoplite.

  • @Calvados656
    @Calvados65610 ай бұрын

    "Sir we've lost 2000 men during our last battle" Commander: "WHAT? What units?!" "It was the peasant legions, sir." Commander: "OH! (Deep breath) Phew... You had me worried for a moment that we had lost someone that mattered. Haha! Good one!"

  • @MartaviusGaming
    @MartaviusGaming10 ай бұрын

    I’m loving the video and consistency! We love you spiff

  • @sethkorkowski213
    @sethkorkowski21310 ай бұрын

    Great job as always spiff

  • @dairoleon2682
    @dairoleon268210 ай бұрын

    Rome: Heart of the Swarm is certainly one of the games of all time.

  • @MonsterCC
    @MonsterCC10 ай бұрын

    HECK YES! More Spiff and Rome, making a cup of gold for this one!

  • @leeewen100
    @leeewen10010 ай бұрын

    That mechanic of pops being used was good, I always made it feel more important where you drew troops from

  • @DonSaborFlavor
    @DonSaborFlavor10 ай бұрын

    I wasn’t sure about this video but I am Peasantly surprised. Another 10/10 video

  • @Mornech10
    @Mornech1010 ай бұрын

    Boudica--- "With this huge army of peasants I'll beat the Roman's out of here!" General Suetonius--- "No..... you won't."

  • @jackhazardous4008
    @jackhazardous400810 ай бұрын

    Luv me pub, luv me 'ooligans, 'ate the romans, simple as.

  • @Chaos8282
    @Chaos828210 ай бұрын

    I actually bought this the day it came out and forgot I had it. Actually looks pretty good with all the improvements and modern hardware.

  • @snakelady647
    @snakelady64710 ай бұрын

    So excited that you're returning to Total War: Rome! I can't get into Civ 6 to save my life, but holy moly, I love me some Rome.

  • @azearaazymoto461
    @azearaazymoto46110 ай бұрын

    24:21 "17000 people are about to learn what the definition of a warcrime is. Wabam." ~ The Spiffing Brit 2023 This is the most beautiful quote I've ever seen.

  • @steemlenn8797
    @steemlenn879710 ай бұрын

    I did something similar with the warbands in the original. 3 exp level from a shrine and attack and armor from the smithes make some very efficient pointy tips.

  • @MrDwarfpitcher

    @MrDwarfpitcher

    4 ай бұрын

    They also get a morale boost with experience. I think your warbands benefit from that greatly. Spiff also should have said that for the peasants. It makes it clear that poor morale turns into good morale if you try hard enough That said i loved my high morale militie in Medieval 2. They start to hold their own if you get them that far

  • @cameronmorgan1211
    @cameronmorgan121110 ай бұрын

    Love your videos!

  • @jacobgebhart7550
    @jacobgebhart755010 ай бұрын

    As a Rome fanboy I have to say. You said Julius Caesar underestimated Britain but he was the first commander to navally invade Britain until the vikings almost 1,000 years later. If any side underestimated the other it was the Britions with Rome. When Caesar came with his nearly full army and navy the Britions didn't even attempt to to stop him. Instead they waited until he landed and fought him on land in pitched battles where he had a greater advantage. The first real military invasion of Britian saw Caesar successfully invading and setting up a client state until Claudius invaded, controlled, and centralized Britain 100 years later.

  • @benjaminarmstead3931
    @benjaminarmstead393110 ай бұрын

    Have you ever tried placing phalanx's in a box formation and blocking off any gaps in between them. They're basically untouchable and you can wipe out whole stacked armies with just 4/5 units...

  • @bl4cksp1d3r

    @bl4cksp1d3r

    10 ай бұрын

    Phalanx in town defense, block every street to the townsquare with two phalanx units in a inside v, easiest defense ever

  • @RootBeerRundown

    @RootBeerRundown

    10 ай бұрын

    I used to do this all the time 😂

  • @waylander9265

    @waylander9265

    10 ай бұрын

    One phalanx(except militia) at the end of a bridge will break anything that doesn’t have ranged attacks or elephants.

  • @bl4cksp1d3r

    @bl4cksp1d3r

    10 ай бұрын

    @@waylander9265 stacked phalanxes were insane aswell. Just filling every square metre with four men

  • @steemlenn8797

    @steemlenn8797

    10 ай бұрын

    I once fought off two roman legionaries and kav stacks with 5 militia or forced phalaxes or whatever they are named. Just put the spearwall around the corner they move, so that kav cannot charge through but is still faster than normal, so get the return piercing and second line tickles.

  • @peregrinemiles7936
    @peregrinemiles793610 ай бұрын

    Wait, I thought that disbanding units gave you a population bump. Can you create population out of thin air???

  • @MartynWilkinson45

    @MartynWilkinson45

    10 ай бұрын

    The remaster doesn't do that by default. There is an option to toggle that on, though. It kind of gimps the ai, poor thing can really figure out population management.

  • @resileaf9501

    @resileaf9501

    10 ай бұрын

    @@MartynWilkinson45 The thing is that the population mechanic was balanced around units being of medium size, with large and ultra (and extreme in the remastered) being capable of emptying cities way too quickly, leaving you with no ability to train units anymore. Using the balanced option, population will be reduced by the same amount that they would be in medium size, ensuring that you don't make all your cities ghost towns that never grow.

  • @googiegress7459

    @googiegress7459

    10 ай бұрын

    @@resileaf9501 It feels like that should be an option that the player must manage; it's the classic balancing act between investing in economy vs. military. If you make the decision to ghost-town a city, it's probably a mistake, but the player might need to do that. The farmer cannot eat the seed he plans to sow.

  • @resileaf9501

    @resileaf9501

    10 ай бұрын

    @@googiegress7459 That *is* an option. You can make the population taken from your cities equal to the number of soldiers they took if you want.

  • @Dorsidwarf

    @Dorsidwarf

    10 ай бұрын

    @@googiegress7459 this is fair, but it was kinda ridiculous how in tw Rome 1 your graphics option (how many men to display as being in a unit) affected the game balance so drastically

  • @GenkiGanbare
    @GenkiGanbare8 ай бұрын

    Rome: "You can't defeat me" SB: "I know...but he can" [AUTO-RESOLVE]

  • @mrbushi1062
    @mrbushi106210 ай бұрын

    Man what a good throw back!!

  • @theenglishknight1520
    @theenglishknight152010 ай бұрын

    Most total war players: No some untrained civillians with pointy sticks shouldn't be able to conquer rome! Spiffing brit: Watch me

  • @nehcrum

    @nehcrum

    10 ай бұрын

    Most total war players: Those unarmored, unshielded peasants will be slaughtered by missiles. Spiffing brit: Autoresolve doesn't care.

  • @efnick96
    @efnick9610 ай бұрын

    As a Greek, I am glad that Persians followed a similar strategy to conquer Greece, but thankfully they didn't have the auto resolve button

  • @Tigran-Abazyan

    @Tigran-Abazyan

    2 ай бұрын

    I wonder why persians didnt try again to invade Ellada. They feared to be Thermopylaed again or something?

  • @orlandolopezdevictoria243
    @orlandolopezdevictoria24310 ай бұрын

    I love your commentary. Hahahahahahhahahahaha. Love the name changes to the cities.

  • @OpreRoma
    @OpreRoma10 ай бұрын

    As a resident of Croydon I'd say we are naturally proficient in the use of sharp melee objects

  • @willh2690
    @willh269010 ай бұрын

    As an unwashed barbarian who grew up on the streets of Croydon I feel both insulted and flattered by this video.

  • @kaltaron1284
    @kaltaron128410 ай бұрын

    I love how even Spiff won't ask us to salute King Charles. I mean I would for the second maybe even the first but the third... not so much. Nice to see that they kept the ridiculous auto-resolve strenth of peasants. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

  • @milosstojanovic4623
    @milosstojanovic462310 ай бұрын

    I even did not knew there is rome total war remaster, definitely gonna play that. 👌

  • @raptorbrotherhood766
    @raptorbrotherhood76610 ай бұрын

    Been such a while missed this dudes total war videos

  • @RaDeus87
    @RaDeus8710 ай бұрын

    I always liked rolling around with a Roman generals and a big heaping army of Barbarian mercenaries, basically reskinned warbands. It was about as fun as using war dogs to kill rebels on the Italian peninsula 😂 Edit: Pure-Yolo gameplay at its finest 👍

  • @maxmach4361
    @maxmach436110 ай бұрын

    You want to impress me? Win RTW while using only Eastern Infantry.. and you are not allowed to let it route.

  • @HERETIC529
    @HERETIC52910 ай бұрын

    On a roll keep up the content!

  • @casualbrowsingyeah
    @casualbrowsingyeah10 ай бұрын

    I remember watching the AngryJoe review for this when it was brand new, and now here I am with TheSpiffingBrit. Time flies, God bless.

  • @qualityoldgames7721
    @qualityoldgames772110 ай бұрын

    This game is still gold after all these years! But how would the peasants fare against men in pink magic pajamas?

  • @timothyernst8812

    @timothyernst8812

    10 ай бұрын

    Time for a test.

  • @milosstojanovic4623

    @milosstojanovic4623

    10 ай бұрын

    Its remaster version, 2 years old.

  • @qualityoldgames7721

    @qualityoldgames7721

    10 ай бұрын

    @@milosstojanovic4623 Agreed. But at its core is the original about 20 years old classic :)

  • @TheRealRusDaddy
    @TheRealRusDaddy10 ай бұрын

    I once defended a city from a bunch of gaul with nothing but a couple dozen peasant troops and 3 units of town guards i choked them up at the door as soon as they started rushing in and bye the end of the fight i had only had one unit route and everyone else was mostly unharmed and almost the entire enemy army was dead at my door still no clue how i won it i had no right to lol

  • @milosstojanovic4623

    @milosstojanovic4623

    10 ай бұрын

    Thats classic way to win. I did that all the time in medieval 2 :D

  • @JacobSprenger
    @JacobSprenger10 ай бұрын

    In the old R:TW with its population mechanics, pops are added whenever you disband a unit in a city, too - it's a handy way to resettle people no longer available in subsequent games.

  • @yvaskhmir
    @yvaskhmir10 ай бұрын

    As a HoMM 5 player I can already say, even before watching the video - peasants are the best thing since taxation was invented.

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