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Meanwhile most of the families are rejecting me because I am declaring beforehand that my parents are divorced. Being a man(Ar-rijaal) and a practicing Muslim is not enough these days. They expect you to be perfect in things you can’t control. It’s as if being honest is a crime!

@maryhoussyan5469

Ай бұрын

Seriously.. I wasn’t accepted because I wasn’t from the same nationality as him. But I don’t understand why they are rejecting you because your parents are divorced, what issue does it cause in the marriage process?

@tartartar23

Ай бұрын

may allah grant you a pious spouse

@letshavefun3653

Ай бұрын

I'm sorry I'm a girl but I don't understand what your parents divorce got to do with your marriage? Just don't tell them your parents are divorced because it dose not affect you or your future family

@abrarhussain4845

Ай бұрын

@@letshavefun3653Yes sister it is a cultural thing not religious.I know that the girls are not the problem here it is the family(wali) causing the issues. They initially like everything about me and my job, my manners and the moment they hear my parents are separated they change their mind. I may be assuming but it appears they don’t want to send their daughter into a broken family.

@omglol9571

Ай бұрын

Take it as a red flag.

I salute to his patience by dealing such brainless people. 😂😂

I think it's important to be upfront about your intentions. The guy probably needs to go for divorcees or widows. No young woman would ever agree to marrying someone who's interested in having 4 wives.

@emma647

Ай бұрын

Why would a divorcee or a widow want that either, men are divorced too and widowed too, and young women don't want them either

@1994mrmysteryman

Ай бұрын

You'd be surprised.

@paruskye8794

Ай бұрын

Muhammad pbuh married only old widows/divorced women with children and he pbuh was almost always the second, third, fourth, fifth, etc. husband. with the exception of aisha ra.

@hijabibeautiful

Ай бұрын

You’re saying it like widows and divorcees are so desperate that they wouldn’t mind? Lol AstaghfirAllah. I’m 29 been married for a few years and honestly wouldn’t mind so much if my husband decided to take on another wife. It’d take some time to get used to but I wouldn’t think of leaving him. BUT that’s not something a woman wants to hear before she even marries you as wife #1

@1994mrmysteryman

Ай бұрын

@@hijabibeautiful A lot of these people love to speak for all women. There's another dude going on about how the Prophet of Allah mostly married divorcees and widows. Like... what is the point of that statement? They're suggesting like he was doing it out of charity. That's simply not the case. It's so hard for them to swallow the fact that a man might marry for desire or longing. Too ingrained with western culture, these people.

From my understanding he means they need to experience life of marriage before they say they will marry 2,3 or 4 . And this is a KZread shorts I hope before commenting bad we need to watch the full video, I am going to see what he said after that inshallah ❤ He is addressing the concept of ihsaan like he says ( in the full video) you should not torture her mentally by saying after I Marry you I'll marry another.

@miriamm9544

Ай бұрын

I personally admire the guy for giving her a heads up. It will save many headaches later.

@infj5196

14 күн бұрын

​@@miriamm9544 but thats not the proper way to deal with women. Even prophet muhammad never did such thing

Nothing wrong with being honest!😝🤷🏿‍♂️

@infj5196

14 күн бұрын

But being too honest is not wise. You can camouflage your intention

He is right he should tell it's better,I think

*SHEIKH IS HILARIOUS 😆*

say O Allah, forgive the believing men and women, those who are living and those who passed away. for goods

Some brothers have absolutely zero game💀

@Xtine72

Ай бұрын

The fact that brothers treat marriage like a game 💀

@Little-sv5ql

Ай бұрын

True it is a game for 95% of b*******.

Almighty bless our marriages Aameen

@geoafrikana

Ай бұрын

Aameen

@HMD1986-

Ай бұрын

Say ALLAH .

I respect the guy being honest. If he can't compromise on having 4 wives and has the intention of doing it already, then he should make it clear to anyone he marries. However, why would he want to marry 4 wives from the start HAHA. He's never been married before perhaps one is enough for him.

@ashj5952

Ай бұрын

@@Little-sv5ql Wife can be male?

@ashj5952

Ай бұрын

@@Little-sv5ql He literally said he wants to marry 4 **wives**. You are making no sense. What is your point? Why are you showing us your flawed upbringing by being rude?

@Little-sv5ql

Ай бұрын

@@ashj5952 fine i will teach you (its free) females or name sake wives can be used as commodities use and throw etc whereas real wife is treated as your life. May be i have exaggerated but i don't have other words.

@ashj5952

Ай бұрын

@@Little-sv5ql Do you mean to say that he just wants to have marital relations and that's why he wants to marry 4? Why else would he want to marry 4 wives? To stare at them?

@ashj5952

Ай бұрын

@@Little-sv5ql It looks like you're trauma dumping.

Another reason for rejection is approaching women from a higher social and financial class.

@markward3981

Ай бұрын

So it's all about money?

@Factual_Truth

Ай бұрын

@@markward3981 partly it is. Women are hypergamous, they want to marry someone who is taller, stronger, richer, than them

@areejshams3253

Ай бұрын

@markward3981 A woman wants to marry into her equal and move into a similar environment as her own. It is suggested in hadith to marry women in "kuff". The man should be compatible as he has to be her quwaim. It is difficult for a woman to settle into an environment less than hers. So yes, money is important to an extent.

@areejshams3253

Ай бұрын

@@markward3981 and marrying women into kuff is suggested in Islam

@areejshams3253

Ай бұрын

​@Factual_Truth Women want to marry into their equal at least. A man has to dominate her, so he should qualify on merits to be her superior.

I never had a marriage proposal rejected. Because I never sent one.

@infj5196

14 күн бұрын

😂😂😂

Subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah subhanallah

If he has trouble finding women who do not want to be in a polygamous marriage, then he has to choose to marry only one OR none. The man has to be of a high status and high standard in order for women to want him when he wants many wives. Your average man will not be desirable when he starts talking about marrying many.

@Ahmed_Malrogi.750

Ай бұрын

Bro your comment is so sh*8, delete it

@saymasultana339

Ай бұрын

Exactly. Either you are extremely good looking, charming or extremely wealthy. Otherwise you're delusional to think that any woman will agree to marry you knowing that you are gonna take more wives.

@infj5196

14 күн бұрын

Or he can just propose to girls WITHOUT telling them about his intention of marrying more than 1. After hes married and his wife starts to get old and couldnt fulfill his needs, he can just marry another young wife. 🧠

@hm8489

14 күн бұрын

@@infj5196 that is his right if he is able to provide for the first wife and fulfill her needs. Again, he would need to be of high status to attract a young wife who is willing to be a second wife.

His reasoning is right as it will prevent a lot of marriages from ending up in divorce and men and women will consider to rectify and spend all their focus on one marriage and enjoy its fruits. BUT if you are a man who is polygamous and knows that he WILL marry four because he can't control his desires, then mention it to all your potential marriage candidates. The young man in the video was being honest and I respect him for that but Sheikh basically told him to work on and take out the fruits from one marriage which is good too. And if you are a female who will not tolerate a cowife ask the man whether he is already married or will have more wives in the future. There are men who do not care about being honest and that marriage is inevitably going to end up in divorce, in most cases. Then dont complain that why did she divorce you. No one likes dishonest people.

@IDBTitanosaurus

Ай бұрын

You don't even know you're gonna get ONE, and you're talking about "maybe I'll marry 3 or 4?" Tsk, what is this?!

@lucydragneel7212

Ай бұрын

@@IDBTitanosaurus lol who said I will be marrying 3 or 4, I am a Muslimah. And I was stating the truth. There are men who will not stop at one at all. So at least the females who he is marrying should know the truth about him. And there are females out there who allow their husbands to marry more than one wife as long as he is giving her and her children all of their rights but such men are not many in number and I just warned the women to not be tricked by men who will marry them, marry other women and not fulfill their rights. You are right about one being enough. Alhamdulillah I know a lot of men who have one wife and they are enjoying the fruits of such a marriage. Their wives and children don't have to worry about all the politics amongst cowives and the woman is not hurt by her husband being with other women. So one wife is good and enough in most cases. And if a man focuses on one wife and tries to make her happy, he will be the one with more ease in life. Is making one wife happy easier or making four happy easier? So one should stop hurting a female and just marry once and focus on improving that one marriage.

@lucydragneel7212

Ай бұрын

​@@Little-sv5qlWe shouldn't assume the worst about someone. We don't know his intentions. Do you know that there are men who justify not telling their potential marriage candidates the truth that they will marry more than one wife? Then they complain about women asking for Khula later on. Just because they were not honest and were being selfish and immature. At least this young man was being honest and informing the person beforehand. I stated a reality that there are men who will not stop at one wife. They are just not like that. Allah has said in the Quran that men and women have been designed differently. There are men who love and treasure one wife and will not even marry again even if she passes away. And there are polygamous men too who just cannot be satisfied with one and no matter how much the wife makes efforts for him, he will marry other women. I wanted women who can't tolerate this to be saved from heartbreak and ask all your potential marriage candidates beforehand of their intentions. And there are women who allow their husbands to marry more than once as long as their and their children's rights are fulfilled. But there are few men who are like this. That's why I warned the women to ask the man whether he is already married or if he wants to have multiple wives. But having one wife will make most men's lives much easier since making one happy is easier than making four happy, there are no worries like the politics amongst cowives, huge bills and the most important thing is that your wife is not hurt by you being with other women while she waits for you the whole day at home. I agree that one should not look for multiple wives and should work hard on one marriage and enjoy its fruits. I haven't seen many polygamous men being happy in their marriages but I have seen many men with one wife being very happy and rushing to their homes the moment they get off work. So get married to one and make her happy.

@lucydragneel7212

Ай бұрын

@@Little-sv5ql Alhamdulillah Ma Shaa Allah Allah has shown me good and bad marriages. And most of the good ones were men who had one wife AND they were committed to them, fulfilled their rights and the rights of their children, didn't complain about their wives but focused on the problem to solve it not to put their wives down. The wives are good to their husbands, obeys them, fulfills their rights and both of the parties treated each other like allies, like friends Ma Shaa Allah. The men didn't look elsewhere and hurt their wives and the wives were grateful for all the efforts their husbands put to please them and obeyed them happily. Both parties didn't use cruel words to put each other down and allow their egos to come between them. Coz where there is ego, love cannot grow. That goes for all relationships. But that does not mean you allow someone to trample on your self respect. Self respect and ego are separate things. Ego involves arrogance, that is, looking down on others while self respect is related to your ability to do things on your own and not get looked down by others. I pray that Allah grants you such a spouse and children and family and friends who will be the coolness of your eyes and will be a source of guidance for you, guidance to attaining Allah and His Prophet Muhammad's SalAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam pleasure. Coz that's the top priority. Ameen.

@KnightofBrilliance

Ай бұрын

​@@lucydragneel7212your tone sounds as if you look down on polygamy...

This is the only Sunnah men know and care about??

@Uneasy-vh4bx

Ай бұрын

Yeah how'd you know, pretty muchthe whole religion is neglected except for this.

@aimensohail1725

Ай бұрын

Apparently. Muslims these days cant complete obligations and talk about sunnahs 🙂😑

@robthebob4586

Ай бұрын

Who are you talking about?

you're basically telling her that she alone isn't good enough by that, if she can't satisfy you then she can find someone else she can, women aren't that desperate infact we cam be quite picky when it comes to this

@redx12ae33

Ай бұрын

Interesting, wouldn't choosing to take a second wife, without previously stating that you are not beyond it, more strongly imply that the first wife is "not enough "? I would think that stating it earlier on would make it very clear that her own performance or non-perfomance played no part in the decision, hence she never has to doubt whether she was "enough" or not. I'm curious about your thought process and how you reached your conclusion (I say this in the least judgemental, condescending or any other form of negativity I'm just genuinely curious)

They ask if she has foreign passport, how much she earns, does she own a home etc etc etc I can’t tell you the horrors I hear also the mums, some mothers who never stepped in that house make comments about the girl’s weight, her studies even about the parents, some share things that don’t interest anyone during such a meeting, a mother spoke about her pregnancies and she came with her daughter in law and was shaming her right in front of the new family! She even told her I don’t like when you bring your kid over for me to take care of him, I mean wtf! Criticising your grand child in front of strangers! Some ask if the girl is willing to wear a heavier or a lighter hijab or to remove it, imagine that! Imagine being the mum of the guy, so a lady of a certain age, and telling the girl she’s so pretty she shouldn’t be wearing hijab, 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️ and all I’m tellling you is in a Muslim society, seriously I think families who refuse proposals have ajr to protect their daughter and after all marriage isn’t a rokn elhemdoulileh

মাশাআল্লাহ ❤❤❤

May Allah grant me a good husband in this year

@infj5196

14 күн бұрын

A good husband is a polygamous one. Just like Prophet Muhammad s.a.w (11 wives at once) and Prophet Sulaiman (99 wives) 💪🏽☪️🕋

@Shinobu2506.

11 күн бұрын

@@infj5196Never!

@Shinobu2506.

11 күн бұрын

Amin🤲🏻 Same for me🤲🏻

It’s possible to be honest and find someone. He just has to keep looking.

How do you know you are going to marry more than one? Even the prophet peace be upon him had trouble with his wives at times. We are not as skilled or capable as the prophet, or Moses or Jesus.

This makes sense🙏

Sheikh you are wrong here, your example don't make sense because it's not the same thing. The guy is trying to be honest and said if he gets chance he will marry again, but looks like no one appreciates his honesty

@saymasultana339

Ай бұрын

You are right. If he intends to marry three or four times, he should mention that. But in this case, he should also be able to accept the rejections because he is gonna have a hard time.finding a wife with this mindset cause most women don't want to share their husbands.

Yeah some brothers act very stupid!

@justarandomguy6794

Ай бұрын

So being honest is stupid now?

@farhank8336

Ай бұрын

@@justarandomguy6794 person can be honest and stupid at same time. NO ONE KNOWS FUTURE. YOU FOCUS ON ONE THING AT TIME. AND MAN DOES NOT NEED TO SEEK PERMISSION FROM FIRST WIFE. ONLY NEEDS TO INFORM HER

@sabdulrahmanshaikh1621

Ай бұрын

​@@farhank8336HE ACTUALLY DOESNT NEED TO INFORM HER ..BUT YEAH HES STUPID

What woman would be ok with her husband marrying other women as well? Common sense

Hey if i marry a guy and he suddenly wants to marry again i would not be happy. So i think it's right that he informs of that beforehand.

❤❤❤❤

Salam please if ask my husband to find a now peace for as to live in and he refused not 1 not 2 n u don't like where you are staying what should I do?

So what if I get rejected because I’m not handsome enough? Then what?

bro want to buying wifes like buying cars

The Shaykh is so wrong on this one. The comparison he drew was completely baseless.

@poetcorner2905

Ай бұрын

Not at all...when a person is already saying something that trigger almost every woman out there of course a guy will be rejected right away. Not even the women of the prophets wanted their husband to re marry.

@triplea417

Ай бұрын

I advise you watch the full video ❤

@redx12ae33

Ай бұрын

​@@poetcorner2905he's talking about the comparison between stating upfront that you're not beyond polygyny and a woman stating that she will ask for divorce... It's quite a stretch to say that those two things are equal no?

he just ain't smooth enough with it

Sheikh whats it means by khula ?

@Ak-vl7xb

Ай бұрын

Khula is when the wife can file for a divorce through the islamic court. But her reason MUST be a justifiable one that is in accordance with the sharia. For example the man doesnt provide for her, or he lied to her about something major before the marriage etc..

@sarar9387

Ай бұрын

@@Ak-vl7xbdo you know if a man needs justification when divorcing a woman? I am just curious.

@latiffajp2862

Ай бұрын

@@Ak-vl7xb thanks a lot sheikh , now i understood much better .. SALAM FROM MALAYSIA ..

@justarandomguy6794

Ай бұрын

​@@sarar9387 yes he needs justification but if he doesn't have one and divorces then the divorce is accepted because the trigger is in his hands. Be it unjust or just that is a different matter

Filing for divorce with no reason is Makrooh Polygyny is Sunnah Nothing alike ...

@sabdulrahmanshaikh1621

Ай бұрын

And filing for divorce when one can't fulfill. The others rights is also sunnah

Maybe that’s what I’m doing wrong I just mention it so it doesn’t fall into issue when or if the possibility comes

@hijabibeautiful

Ай бұрын

Do you even have ONE wife yet? Trust me there’s a 80% chance you’ll change your mind after getting married and having kids the first go round lol. Either way may Allah bless your endeavors with happiness wealth and health and you have dozens of pious beautiful children.

@ozzieone16

Ай бұрын

@@hijabibeautiful 80% chance? Then I’m the 20% maybe if Allah doesn’t will it I might never get the means like wealth to do it but the reasoning for me not getting married multiple is that and not that I wasn’t willing to you again there is many marriages broken because man got second wife and wife never expected it or was willing to accept it many sisters directly mention no second wife so although this was more of a joke I do believe you have to get your intentions clear and if my mindset changes during the marriage then that’s a plus for her but if it doesn’t she isn’t shocked as she always knew even before marriage

@dipperpines661

Ай бұрын

@@ozzieone16marriage is hard like having more than one is more than a burden than what you think. That’s why most Muslims in 2024 don’t have more than one wife it’s a huge sacrifice

@LoudenSwain

Ай бұрын

You ain’t no Andrew tate so stick to one unless you have his money

@tahirballikaya213

Ай бұрын

it is about HOW you say it. Like talking about these things in the first or second meeting is really bad idea, most women can't even stand the idea of it. It's like you wanting her to reject you almost. Just try to establish a connection first, talk about common interests, religious views, dreams hopes etc. and once there is a fit there is time to talk about these deeper "contraversial" topics later on.

ummm i don't think this is true, are there really ppl out there who intent marrying more than 1 and before even getting a 1st wife? i honestly don't think so. if these pplare out there they gotta be too rare

@sabdulrahmanshaikh1621

Ай бұрын

And too day dreamers

What is khulr???

@_essa3294

Ай бұрын

It's when a woman is the one to initiate the divorce

Sheikh there is alot of racism between Muslims in uk. Also, there are alot of demands from girls side which is why so many girls and boys are single

@sabdulrahmanshaikh1621

Ай бұрын

Yet still the man wants to marry four

😂😂😂

There is nothing wrong with being truthful. The man is right 👍. There are so many girls who are not married. Islam gives the permission to marry more than one woman. I have never seen you encouraging financial strong men to marry more.

@sarahm4516

24 күн бұрын

i think this story is a perfect example of how women are not interested in pologamy, men talk about it as if its something easy for them to achieve but its not, unless a woman is in a very bad way/circumstance she won't marry you if you want another

W

Yes, No sane woman gonna accept his proposal. But I appreciate his honesty.

@ahmad.b6745

Ай бұрын

This is why men should never tell part. He just could have done it and after he tell her 😈😈

@infj5196

14 күн бұрын

This is why men are allowed to lie to his wife to prevent her from getting angry 🤭

The sheikh is very out of line with this one. Something that allah has permitted the man to do something that's 100% halal , why are we stigmatizing it? This concept of one man to one woman is not from islam. If a man has the capability and he's mentioning it clearly before hand then there's nothing wrong, or else why would he want tension later? And what if the wife puts a clause in the marriage contract that you cant marry a second time? What then? Then he's binded by the contract. And can't exercise something which ALLAH has made it halal for him. This is a huge problem in the ummah. We stigmatize what's halal and haram according to the norms of the kaafirs, when their norms shouldn't matter to us all while saying we are proud of our religion.

@LoudenSwain

Ай бұрын

The point went right over your head. There’s a time and place for everything. Knowledge is knowing what to say and wisdom is knowing when to say it. The true sunnah anyways is to be like Rasul pbuh. And he married one until she passed away and ONLY then did he marry multiple. That’s the TRUE WAY which makes a Rasuls pbuh way verbatim. Not too mention brothers today who marry multiple do it out of lust not love and they can’t barely take care of one let alone two which is haram. If you can’t be fair and buy your wife everything she desires then stick with one…

@user-rp7sr9xt5b

Ай бұрын

This was the personal choice of the Prophet ﷺ, not a sunnah. The verse in surah Nisa is clear, men are permitted to marry women, two, or three, or four. And if they fear they are unjust, they should marry one. ​@@LoudenSwain

@LoudenSwain

Ай бұрын

@@user-rp7sr9xt5b if you wanna be like the prophet you follow him as Allah said in Quran there is an example in Rasul for anyone who wants to enter Jannah. You are not above him or are you? So we only follow his way

@suhair13

Ай бұрын

@@LoudenSwain if you look at the rasool sallallahu alaihi wasallam's life. He married 10 times after kadija RA' s death and the verse of surah nisa including other many Islamic rulings came down after her death. He sallallahu alaihi wasallam had many marriages that were overlapping after his migration to medina.And Its obviously implied that a man is following all the rules of sharia with the first marriage before proceeding to the second. Also the marriage interview is the only place a man and a woman interact in islam before getting married. There's no " time or place" other than the marriage interview.

@MuslimBeeKeeper

Ай бұрын

@@LoudenSwainthere is no possibility to buy any woman everything she wants. Only the basics are required.

What if they ask to put that in the nikkah contract for no polygamy?

@diavolo9177

Ай бұрын

Then she can divorce if bro breaks that contract

@Kanafa-lf2ys

Ай бұрын

@@johnxhina8857 you should verify your response before posting something regarding Islam otherwise you could be held accountable.

@Kanafa-lf2ys

Ай бұрын

@@yuanfen06 can you provide evidence for your claim? It’s important that we fact check all matters especially when it comes to our deen.

@johnxhina8857

Ай бұрын

@@Kanafa-lf2ys I hope you can forgive me I just watched a video of assim al hakeem saying she can put anything in the contract.

@Kanafa-lf2ys

Ай бұрын

@@johnxhina8857 I remember seeing that video. Jazak Allah Khair.