⚖ Did I miss any great Onion headlines? 💡Learn interactively with Brilliant! legaleagle.link/brilliant

@stargazingbeginner

Жыл бұрын

i dont think so

@HBP27

Жыл бұрын

You repeated the chinese late night thing lmao

@Genshinlmpact

Жыл бұрын

yeah one clip came twice

@shawnmark3492

Жыл бұрын

Could you do a reaction video to Weird Al's I'll sue ya, to see how many are legitimate and how many are frivolous?

@LecherousCthulhu

Жыл бұрын

The Lawyers who won time from god wouldn't be immortal they would only live an extra 209 billion years. They actually wouldn't get to spend more than 0.02% of that time alive on earth as the sun would come to the end of it's life cycle. Also the Lawyers would never get to use any of that time as they would still be lawyers and have to work their law practice for what will seem like an eternity to them.

“Jurisprudence Fetishist Gets Off On Technicality” is a classic, and definitely one of my all-time favorite Onion headlines

@JuDGe3690

Жыл бұрын

I have that on a T-shirt, and wore it to the first day of my Civil Procedure class. The professor loved it!

@Haan22

Жыл бұрын

The SMJ follow up wasn't bad either.

@ScientistCat

Жыл бұрын

Time to visit a law school and kinkshame any student with excellent grades.

@mennograafmans1595

Жыл бұрын

I always live double meanings in headlines. One I saw on an actual newspaper, that was a legitimate mistake, was in dutch: "Problemen mortuarium lijken opgelost." It could mean either of these two: "Problems morgue seem solved." "Problems morgue, bodies evaporated."

@jameseglavin4

Жыл бұрын

Yeah that is such a brilliantly lean joke, you couldn’t add or subtract *anything* from that. Perfection

The Chinese food trope will remain in movies/tv because the boxes are opaque, so they can be full to the brim or nearly empty and the continuity person is good.

@michaelpettersson4919

Жыл бұрын

Either that or you get the traditional Star Trek scean where plates of food are served, looked at for three seconds before finding excuse to leave the table.

@jomarcentermjm

Жыл бұрын

A single company really profits from single design prop.

@NobodyHere96

Жыл бұрын

Also LegalEagle repeated that segment twice in the video. Most likely an accident.

@micwclar

Жыл бұрын

@@michaelpettersson4919 if the plates are visible, there is a person responsible for continuity between takes. If there is more than 1 take, it's jarring to see a full plate and then seconds later, a near empty plate. Watch any holiday movie, if they have a scene at the table, they try not to show the plates by using close-ups or over-the-shoulder shots.

@slimmccoy8863

Жыл бұрын

Similar to how a bag of groceries will often have a loaf of french bread sticking out, there's an immediate visual association.

I was at a workshop recently where a woman was rude to the volunteer picking us up at the airport. Her excuse was, "Look, I'm from New York," as if that justified it. Which leads me to my favorite Onion headline: after the 9/11 attacks, the Onion waited a decent interval, then had a headline "NATION FEELS TEMPORARY AFFECTION FOR NEW YORK."

@redherronrecords

11 ай бұрын

I lol'd at that shit, reminds me of a joke: What was osama bin laden's favorite nfl team? New York Jets.

@jackbaldyga7952

11 ай бұрын

@@redherronrecords Never heard that one before

@EllpaFox47

9 ай бұрын

well at least they were respectful and waited a while before making a potentially super offensive fake article

@spvillano

9 ай бұрын

@@jackbaldyga7952 same here. Lost a cousin and a few friends in the attack and well, it's funny. Lost more friends serving in the wars, only one of which made sense.

@MasquedJustice

9 ай бұрын

@@spvillanosorry for your loss

When I was in college I read an Onion article that said that teens who are contemplating suicide should be put in a writing class so they can write a decent suicide note. It had 2 notes where the numerous errors were corrected in red pen. I showed it to some of my English professors and the response was always how horrible this was followed by asking me if it was alright for them to make a copy of the article.

@m4rcyonstation93

Жыл бұрын

i need this one

@tigermisty5901

Жыл бұрын

Are you doing alright?

@ghost.8836

Жыл бұрын

@@tigermisty5901 He didn't say he wanted to commit suicide, he just found an Onion article while in college.

@darlinglionheart4195

Жыл бұрын

As they say, better to have it & not need it than to need it & not have it :) (the ability to write a decent note)

@gonerofsavers3813

11 ай бұрын

Guess I should improve my writing, thanks! ...

I am legitimately shocked that aside about class action lawsuits having horrible websites wasn’t a segue for a square space commercial

@jasong9492

Жыл бұрын

That legit would've been the BEST segue ever.

@anshshah2363

Жыл бұрын

@@jasong9492 agreed

@archae108

Жыл бұрын

Honestly, they need it

@kaushalsuvarna5156

Жыл бұрын

😅

@cericat

Жыл бұрын

Seriously I could hear the tie in as he commented on it, or a VPN ad.

Should do an “Onion or Not” episode, where you have to guess if a legal headline is real or fake

@aromaladyellie

7 ай бұрын

Onion or Nonion (nunyan)

@assimilation9

6 ай бұрын

That’s a great idea!

@KRJ893

5 ай бұрын

Every year following the 2015-2019 era it became harder and harder and harder to do that

@Mr.Sparks.173

5 ай бұрын

R/nottheonion is a pretty good place to harvest onion like headlines that are true news stories.

@DravenGal

4 ай бұрын

@@KRJ893 Truth.

"Why do the class-action websites always look terrible?" As a web app developer with many big banks and credit unions as clients, I'd guess the reason is similar: they refuse to ditch Internet Explorer, and no sane, self-respecting, and qualified web developer wants to deal with IE.

@fisch37

Жыл бұрын

They actually still use IE? Okay they're probably using Win7 if not WinXP...

@greenpiersystem

Жыл бұрын

​@@fisch37 They don't want to ditch it because they want EVERYONE to see it, I'm assuming. Even the guy who is actively covered in moss while staring at his IBM PS/2 computer. While I don't support complete deprecation of software (the shit that happened with Flash pissed me off to no end, and the fact that people trying to revive software are getting sued despite the software not being maintained anymore is worse,) you do have to know when the ship has sailed.

@missingtexturez

Жыл бұрын

IE hasn't shut down yet?

@fisch37

Жыл бұрын

@@missingtexturez Well, it's fully offline. Besides: Microsoft is way into backwards compatibility. They support software back to Windows XP at the least

@blakksheep736

Жыл бұрын

They STILL use _Internet Explorer?_ How and why?!?

"Everyone on the defense team has their counterpart on the prosecution and they're gonna fall in love and they will betray their client for the greater good" Me, an Ace Attorney fan: *nervous sweating*

@suzanneclark7706

Жыл бұрын

You went there too, eh?

@Panroles

Жыл бұрын

Same with the technicality one.

@wulfsbane4426

Жыл бұрын

It's a special pain that we share, huh? Miles is something.

@chloei8117

Жыл бұрын

That is EXACTLY what I first thought of!!

@n00bxl71

Жыл бұрын

I pity whoever gets matched with Payne

"I think people on the Supreme Court are perfectly fine human beings." That there's an EXCELLENT Onion headline.

@GoddoDoggo

Жыл бұрын

@@democrrrracymanifest A lot of serial killers were known to be very nice and affable and even wonderful spouses and parents in their day-to-day lives, but that doesn't really make them "fine human beings."

@Amorcea

Жыл бұрын

@@democrrrracymanifest I don't think you can be an "extremely nice person" and also sexually harass people, on top of everything else. That's just a bad person with good PR.

@ashleyhoughton8592

Жыл бұрын

There's a 3-part run of 'Behind the Bastard's' that does a deep dive into his life... And you don't get a three parter on a show called "behind the bastard's" by being a nice person.

@Grace-es9fc

Жыл бұрын

Yeah I was surprised he said that

@jm221

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, he really shouldn't say things he can't take back over the next two to five years

One of my favourite Onion headlines of all time. From 2008: "Recession-Plagued Nation Demands New Bubble To Invest In". The Onion is also on by far one of the best sources for accurate and truthful news.

@SebastianSonntag

Жыл бұрын

My favourite is from 2001: "Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'"

@Ericwvb2

Жыл бұрын

My favorite of all time is "Philandering String Theorist Can Explain Everything."

@joseville

Жыл бұрын

And future news too!

@asterix7842

Жыл бұрын

My favorite was after Obama won in 2008: Black man given nation’s worst job.

@phineas81707

Жыл бұрын

The nation eventually discovered that they could pay thousands of dollars for "bits" of coins.

The whole "lawyers eating Chinese food" thing actually makes a lot of sense, from a logical perspective; traditionally, the only two types of food available for delivery, as busy law firms wouldn't have the spare time to send someone out to buy food, were Chinese food and pizza, and it would probably look really bad for important legal documents to show up in court covered in grease prints.

@jmurray1110

Жыл бұрын

Apparently it’s just good for reshoots since you can’t see inside the box like other foods

@sylvrwolflol

11 ай бұрын

@@jmurray1110This, and you don't have to deal with product placement and problematic copyrighted or trademarked material. You can do the same thing with a Burger King or Wendy's bag, but then they'd have to show those logos to point out that the paper bag in question is filled with food. The Chinese takeout box is iconic in shape without showing its contents or a logo.

@spvillano

9 ай бұрын

Are coffee cup stains still forgiven? I'll just get my hat...

Devin: "Everyone On Defense Team An Equally Matched Romantic Interest for Member of Prosecution." Me: "Glares At Ace Attorney"

@Hyperboid

9 ай бұрын

Why would you say "Glares At Ace Attorney" out loud?

@meapyboy12345

8 ай бұрын

@@Hyperboid because why not?

@HarryLLC

7 ай бұрын

@@Hyperboid Even More Importantly Why Are We Talking Like This?

@Hyperboid

7 ай бұрын

​@@HarryLLCYou are the only one talking in title case

@edgeworth097

6 ай бұрын

At no point in the games does that happen

For anyone curious, the "45 seconds of extra life" would have the lawyers win... ~2.86 * 10^13 years. What's that, word form? Oh, you know, 28 trillion years. That means if they get 30% of that, they will have ~8.56 trillion years of their own.

@bikesgoodgasbad

Жыл бұрын

Is that long after the cold heat death of the universe? The sun will expand and swallow earth in less than 0.01% of that time

@MarsJenkar

Жыл бұрын

To put that into perspective, our star has about 6 _billion_ years until it hits the white dwarf phase, and the longest estimated lifespan of any star (the smallest of red dwarf stars) is about 10 trillion years. It's thought the galaxies will all go dark about 120 trillion years from now, since there won't be enough hydrogen gas left to form new stars anywhere, except via rare collisions between already-existing stellar or substellar objects.

@stoppit9

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for doing the math

@joermnyc

Жыл бұрын

Well 8.5 trillion years, guess those lawyers will invent warp drive to escape from the sun dying in about 5-6 billion years.

@iamzid

Жыл бұрын

well, statistics show that they'd get killed long before they could ever live that long.

Uber got slapped with ADA recently. It was found that the two minute waiting time is too short, and billing people for waiting time when they legitimately have troubles getting to the car, or boarding, was discriminatory.

@gloraelin

Жыл бұрын

You can now actually [...supposedly] pre-waive the waiting fee if you're disabled on the website!

@gloraelin

Жыл бұрын

Update on this -- i had registered as disabled [i am a full-time wheelchair user, and use a walker to transfer] and actually got hit with a waiting fee a week ago. I just escalated the support chat/filled out the right form and it was refunded, no questions asked.

@jandorniak6473

Жыл бұрын

@@gloraelin that's cool. You probably shouldn't have to escalate at all, but nice that it worked. I assume you haven't registered as disabled?

@gloraelin

Жыл бұрын

@@jandorniak6473 uh, i said in my comment that i had registered...?

@jandorniak6473

Жыл бұрын

@@gloraelin I missed that. Weird that you have to actually ask support to waive that fee then... But still good.

The explanation for the Chinese take-out was that it makes it easier for continuity. If they're eating off plates & you have to re-shoot a scene, you have to make sure the food looks sufficiently similar. If it's concealed in a box, it doesn't matter what the food looks like or how much is left.

@silverbird425

Жыл бұрын

It's just a box.

To answer "why do class action claim sites look so janky?" it might be an idea to ask "what happens to the unclaimed settlement money ?" Because if that just gets to sit in a law firm's account earning interest, I think we may have our answer as to the reason for the low quality of the websites.

@LuisLopez2

Жыл бұрын

Are you sure that's the case? Because I was a plaintiff from both the Doordash and Postmates settlements in California and according to their sites any unclaimed amounts will be dispersed during a second payment after a particular amount of time.

@thegodofallakira6349

9 ай бұрын

⁠@@LuisLopez2They’re lawyers, why are you taking what they write at face value Dispersed to who? After what period of time? What amount of it?

@LuisLopez2

9 ай бұрын

@@thegodofallakira6349 since I posted this reply I got a second payment for same settlement. And another settlement from Postmates. The amount of the settlement and the percentages and points granted for each case were clearly explained on the settlement papers provided during the sign up process. Math doesn't have a side I was part of a class-action lawsuit with an online publishing company 18 years ago and just last year I got another check from that settlement, probably the eighth or ninth check I have gotten over the years. Unclaimed settlements, by law, have to be redispersed until the settlement fund is gone. More likely in the future I might even get another check from the settlement and the one from Postmates. Of course, each new round of checks will be substantially smaller.

@robdeskrd

4 ай бұрын

Money awarded from a class action lawsuit would probably sit in some kind of trust account

Signing up for a class action lawsuits should be done through an official government website. That would remove the "Is this a scam?" factor.

@almc8445

Жыл бұрын

Oh god please no, we don't need more shitty govt. websites 😩

@richardbloemenkamp8532

Жыл бұрын

Yes agree, especially the format should be standard and payment system as well. Actually, I find the presented website reasonably descent looking, but if every class-action has a different format it does not built any trust. Coupons should be avoided, a bank cheque is quite ideal and practical. Just give the people back the money they deserve.

@LendriMujina

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, that would remove any doubt that it's a scam.

@thaurane

Жыл бұрын

@@almc8445 On one hand I agree. On the other if they weren't so constantly shit then the idea wouldn't be at least somewhat reasonable.

What has always bought me joy about the Onion, is that the fact that even now some people still get sucked in and believe it is a real news source. Opps spoilers.

@craigkdillon

Жыл бұрын

That is because The Onion's stories are more credible and rational than real news. We live in a crazy world, don't you know?

@slimmccoy8863

Жыл бұрын

And as they say, Truth is stranger than Fiction

@Yora21

Жыл бұрын

Was it Poe's Law that states "Extreme believes and parodies of extreme believes are indistinguishable from each other."

@JimboRustles

Жыл бұрын

Well most of them are real headlines, just from the future

@cericat

Жыл бұрын

@@craigkdillon Yep, the Daily Currant (another satire news site) ran a story about Todd Akin saying breastmilk "cures" homosexuality, in the wake of his most notable news story regarding "the body has ways of shutting it down in the case of legitimate..." entirely believable of the man after what he'd actually said.

I like how Onion articles always seem so topical and up-to-date before I found out it was written in 2006.

It's amazing to me how accurate The Onion is---years later. Satire when written, truth after the passage of time.

@Liface

Жыл бұрын

The Onion is the only site on the internet that has continued to be good since the 90s

shout out to madison, wisconsin where the onion was born in 1988. they were distributed free in boxes on the street and on racks inside grocery stores and such. i remember picking one up the first time and not gonna lie, i was baffled for a second, and then utterly ~delighted~.

@cathysamborn4709

Жыл бұрын

I miss reading the Onion, and yes I'm from Wisconsin.

@TouchTheStars

Жыл бұрын

As someone who also lives in Madison, wooooo! Yeah! Lmao Seriously though, it's hard to wrap my head around actually living in the city where something huge and well-known like The Onion was started... It's awesome! I can't believe it's come so far though, glad others get to experience it!

@Khronogi

Жыл бұрын

I never knew it was started here. I just remember always picking up an issue at woodmans.

@ClearAlera

Жыл бұрын

Heck yeah! Fellow Wisconsinite here, and I fondly remember them being stocked for free at a mall next to my high school. Never missed a week, they've always been hilarious.

Im surprised the God - Life settlement article didn't have a joke about the lawyer doing it Pro-Bono due to being an immortal vampire, not needing the extra life.

@MrWhangdoodles

Жыл бұрын

Na, they'd be demons, considering they sold their soul to the Devil.

@coriespringer9785

Жыл бұрын

I am surprised nobody pointed out that while he is immortal, he will still age.

@richardarriaga6271

Жыл бұрын

@@coriespringer9785 That's just bad lawyering to not have a full health and anti-aging clause.

@DovahGirlie

Жыл бұрын

@@richardarriaga6271 Well one could apply for afterlife insurance to fix the issue of how fast you decay, but the problem those lawyers will encounter is that you need to have your own birth _and_ death certificates on hand in order to qualify. Think of it like Beetlejuice's lore - if you aren't technically dead in some way, you're just a schmoe stuck in a purgatory of limbo. And without that soul taken out of your body, you're gonna roam the Earth looking like a literal zombie.

@homsar5675

Жыл бұрын

Just because they don't need the extra life doesn't mean they won't take it. Have you met a lawyer before?

I know a lawyer who never went to law school. He just took the bar exam over and over until he passed.

@d9zirable

11 ай бұрын

"what a sick joke!"

@robdeskrd

4 ай бұрын

yeah it's kinda weird how graduating from law school doesn't grant a law license

The food trope started with Law and Order because the director didn't know how to make scenes look less boring while people were just discussing what was going on. He ultimately decided people eating and talking helped make the scene look more dynamic. It's why cops are constantly getting food at food carts on the streets and lawyers are always eating takeaway in their offices or dining out at restaurants while discussing cases.

The Onion is almost the journalistic equivalent of the Simpsons at predicting our life nowadays, please do more of these!

@mitchellpatterson1829

Жыл бұрын

The Simpsons has not really predicted anything, we just have all the exact same problems we did in 1989.

@ultimatefandom3127

Жыл бұрын

@@mitchellpatterson1829 fair enough, that's true.

@Hayseus712

Жыл бұрын

@@mitchellpatterson1829 then why is there an aurora borealis in my kitchen? 🤔

@TyphinHoofbun

Жыл бұрын

@@Hayseus712 Aurora borealis. Aurora borealis?! At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen? ...May I see it?

@Hayseus712

Жыл бұрын

@@TyphinHoofbun ...no.

Also one legal trope I seen in real life in how chummy prosecutors, defense, and judges were each other. I was a part time bailiff for a several months and remember seeing a defense attorney, prosecutor, and judge chatting away about a ski vacation one of them took while the defendant was squirming. I was thinking, wow those dinner scenes in Law & Order had some truth. It also kinda makes sense. After a while I realized most lawyers would come from similar school or professional circles. Lots of defense attorneys are former prosecutors and judges are former lawyers. Also it doesn't help to be too adversarial either.

"the people on the Supreme court are perfectly fine human beings" well that didn't age well

@Dioxazine_Stars

5 ай бұрын

Yeahhhh…

@norsethenomad5978

5 ай бұрын

I mean, this dude is an actual lawyer with a law firm. What is he supposed to say? The Supreme Court Justices are vile excuses of human beings that will cater to the highest bidder? Thats how you get blacklisted in that business

@spudthepug

22 күн бұрын

…ya. It’s not getting better!

Politicians being perfectly fine with each other as some pretend to defend us while others work their hardest to ruin our lives just ruling class solidarity and makes them anything but perfectly fine people

Some of the best Onion headlines came from "Holy F____g S____: Attack on America", their first issue printed after 9/11: "American Life Turns Into Bad Jerry Bruckheimer Movie" "Not Knowing What Else to Do, Woman Bakes American-Flag Cake" "Rest of Country Temporarily Feels Deep Affection for New York" and the best one of them all: "Hijackers Surprised to Find Themselves in Hell: 'We Expected Eternal Paradise for This,' Say Suicide Bombers"

@Rejukem

Жыл бұрын

That's gold Jerry! GOLD!

@lentlemenproductions770

Жыл бұрын

The last one is so simple but REALLY funny.

@demon-goat

Жыл бұрын

@@lentlemenproductions770 maybe I’m just super dumb but I don’t get it, can you explain?

@fihyrulesmonado7659

Жыл бұрын

@@demon-goat It has to do with the religions and ideologies of those particular terrorists. That simple.

@incompetencelogistics8924

Жыл бұрын

@@demon-goat the joke is killing a bunch of new yorkers was supposed to be a good thing

Tim Horton's in Canada was caught illegally tracking users of their app and the proposed settlement is a free coffee and doughnut. So yeah, the class action on isn't far off.

@JollyOldCanuck

Жыл бұрын

A solid C$2.50 payout.

@CorvusCorone68

Жыл бұрын

@@JollyOldCanuck that sounds looney... badumtsh

@jpdemer5

Жыл бұрын

The attorneys got a million coupons for donuts and coffee.

I recently received a check from a class action lawsuit. $0.10. I might retire

The people on the supreme court being fine human beings. That one aged badly xD

The Onion TV show (clips can be found on KZread) are the most entertaining and funny videos on KZread. Everything from "Breaking News: Some Bull**** Happening Somewhere" to "Judge Rules White Girl Will Be Tried As Black Adult". It was the golden age of comedy. And everything seems to still be relevant today.

@Angie-Pants

Жыл бұрын

Franz Kafka International Airport is still the funniest thing that's ever been on the internet.

@Tjalve70

Жыл бұрын

My favourite is "Situation in Nigeria Seems Pretty Complex".

@Althea-42

Жыл бұрын

​@@Tjalve70 The debate over the burning money pit is one I always remember too.

@honeybadger1847

Жыл бұрын

I rewatch Bullsh+t every six months or so. Classic.

@8stormy5

Жыл бұрын

"Judge Rules White Girl Will Be Tried As Black Adult" is one of The Onion's best. So is the real-time polling data during debate video

The Catholic church Onion article made me think that the obscure world of Catholic Canon law would be a fascinating video for a secular lawyer to investigate

@johndododoe1411

Жыл бұрын

Don't forget the surprising list of famous people who were technically Catholic lawyers.

@barvdw

10 ай бұрын

Having known a few canon law students in Leuven, the people studying it are just as crazy as you'd imagine, too.

The Onion really takes me back. I grew up in Milwaukee, Wisconsin and you could find their weekly publication for free at various kiosks around the city. Now everything is online, so I think you can go back pretty far if you want to.

+1 showing love for The Onion. I used to grab the free printed version from one of the curbside paper boxes in NYC 20 years ago (gasp!) My all-time favorite, though it’s not legal in nature, came out after Obama defeated Dubya: “World’s Worst Job Given To Black Man” So classic.

All time "favorite" political/legal Onion headlines Area Man Passionate Defender Of What He Imagines Constitution To Be ‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens (mass shootings)

@Andrew-ry9be

Жыл бұрын

I also like how Onion repeats the second headline whenever it happens, and the same comments on IG follow that post.

@CityPlannerPlaysChair

Жыл бұрын

@@Andrew-ry9be did you see it after Buffalo/Uvalde? The entire page was that headline going back years.

@ANunes06

Жыл бұрын

"Man Who Thought He'd Lost All Hope Loses Last Additional Bit Of Hope He Didn't Even Know He Still Had" "Study: Dolphins Not So Intelligent On Land" "Craigslist Server Contracts HPV" "Drugs Win Drug War" "World Death Rate Holding Steady At 100 Percent" They've been rolling out bangers for decades.

@Ericwvb2

Жыл бұрын

They run the "no way to prevent this" after every notable massacre - 25 times so far.

@Hermititis

Жыл бұрын

They republish the mass shooting one each time one happens, and the only edit is the date & location in the dateline.

re: class-action lawsuits. Thank you for calling out unprofessional looking but real websites being thought of as scams! It definitely sucks because some illegitimate sites look more legitimate than actual legitimate websites.

@Azide_zx

Жыл бұрын

its crazy how sophisticated some scams have gotten compared to legitimate efforts and businesses

Quite funny headlines, but in all honesty, the backpedaling with the "230,000 defective lawyers" made me laugh even more

@EdnaK728

9 ай бұрын

My mind immediately went to Lionel Hutz

The only class action lawsuit I filled out was against FB because I live in Illinois. I heard about it before I saw the ad, so when I saw it I knew it was legit. I got paid out $300 and honestly, that's the best perk I've received from living in Illinois. 🙃

@Cool_Calm_Cam

Жыл бұрын

Hey, we've got legal weed now, and we're ending cash bail! ...Hopefully you'll never need that second thing though.

@blakksheep736

Жыл бұрын

I'm so sorry.

@crowe6961

Жыл бұрын

@@Cool_Calm_Cam Now we just need legal weed at reasonable prices, it's a bloody racket.

@Fetidaf

10 ай бұрын

@@crowe6961yea but that was always going to be the trade off

@spvillano

9 ай бұрын

Well, at least your state has a perk. I'm in Pennsylvania, we gave away our only perk to Kentucky, via the rifle that got named after them - from PA rifle makers.

I'm surprised The Onion is still in business... Real-life headlines are crazier than anything they could come up with!

@CityPlannerPlaysChair

Жыл бұрын

IIRC they had a headline about that

@rahcollier7006

Жыл бұрын

R/nottheonion

@Ericwvb2

Жыл бұрын

"Headless body in topless bar" "Boyd Corbin, Once Arrested for Fighting a Drag Queen With a Tiki Torch, Runs for Wilton Manors Mayor" "Man desperate for ride to Hooters calls 911, ends up in jail" "Man busted trying to steal full rack of ribs stashed in his pants"

@stoppit9

Жыл бұрын

I follow them on Twitter and sometimes I have to check the handle twice

@___LC___

Жыл бұрын

The Onion was ahead of it’s time.

7:14 Ace Attorney. That is all.

@Mordecrox

Жыл бұрын

Eat your hamburger

The black highlighters one is so good - "almost invariably the most crucial passages"

2:36 _Class-action lawsuits are notorius for paying small amount of money or coupons to the class._ LegalEagle nailed it. Tim Hortons proposed settlement is a free coffee and donut. And true, it is only the lawyers that get rich.

@Highfalutinloyd

Жыл бұрын

How many Timbits do the attorneys get??

@stevehouston2053

Жыл бұрын

@@Highfalutinloyd Lol. I looked up the lawyers and all they do is class actions. Easy money for them.

@macdjord

11 ай бұрын

All class action settlements should be defined in the amount they pay per plaintiff. And the payment to the lawyers should be a percentage of the amount actually claimed by the victims.

@XCC23

11 ай бұрын

@@macdjord I mean, they are. That's kind of the entire thing. Class action lawsuits are generally a fuckton of people who have been wronged, but not massively in a way that would make it worth it to sue on their own. So some lawyers sniff out these situations, go "okay, look, I can definitely try to punch McDonald's in the nose or something, and I'll do it for free, but in return, part of the full recovered sum is mine. If we lose, which is a possibility, none of y'all have to pay anything." So there are two options for a lawsuit, either the lawyers take it for free and go "yeah, pay me when you win" (but then, since I'm putting *my* income on the line to prosecute your claim, I'll take 25% of the total sum) or they go "pay as you go, my billable rate is like $500 per hour of work, and if we lose, you still have to pay me." Who would sign on to a class action lawsuit with a real chance of losing where you'd have to pay the law firm if you lost?

@macdjord

11 ай бұрын

@@XCC23 If they end up winning a judgement of $12.46 per claimant which nobody bothers collecting because its not worth the bother, they didn't actually win anything meaningful and thus should not get a lot of money.

I am not a lawyer by profession, nor am I an American but I still find this channel entertaining because how eloquently he talks

@Yosef9438

Жыл бұрын

Eloquent, but lucid

IIRC, the reason that settlement websites tend to look shady is because settlement companies have stopped trying to get ahead of scammers. Because there are so many of them and they handle enough of a volume that they can't customize them, scammers are pretty much guaranteed to have access to their templates. If they make a new template, then by the time they get a chance to use it there would probably be a significant amount of scam settlement sites out there using it.

Please walk thru the Alex Jones trial... Especially the part when his attorney "accidently" sent his texts and didn't retract them.

To paraphrase Bill Hicks, "I didn't know when they said 'anybody can be a lawyer' they really meant anybody... A body of water. A dead body."

7:18 This is the reason why I rate _A Few Good Men_ as one of the best movies ever made. The original screenplay wanted Demi Moore's character to get romantically involved with Tom Cruise's character but director Rob Reiner said that would be unnecessary since this was a movie about two co-workers just doing their jobs. And they did.

@onijester56

Жыл бұрын

Hell, I want a movie where the two opposing sides do end up romantically involved in the first portion of the movie, independent of the trial. Then the trial itself comes along, and they end up on opposing sides. But still do their job without making it personal or petty.

@ChibiHoshiDragon

Жыл бұрын

@@onijester56 JAG did have a good depiction of a pair who did face off often and DID do their jobs regardless of their feelings.

"Seems like only yesterday that we were dealing with Donald Trump and his team of horrible, horrible lawyers." Ah, how history repeats itself.

Was part of a class action about 2 years ago, payout was 43 cents.

The Onion: This is so over the top it could NEVER actually happen, right? The US: Hold my beer...

@kindlin

Жыл бұрын

...and get me my gun.

I was part of the Uber class action and can confirm the website looked like a scam.

@bernlin2000

Жыл бұрын

You can check the links and verify the emails 10x over and it's still... super sketchy. You would think it was the gig companies that designed the website, to keep the claims low 😂 maybe the lawyers get to keep whatever goes uncollected 🤔 someone needs to hire a proper we developer...these class action lawsuits certainly have plenty of liquidity if successful in court.

@Y2B123

Жыл бұрын

​@@bernlin2000 They use one-time super long domains and don't explain how to verify their legitimacy - they just claim to be court-approved! I usually have to rely on external resources to find out that. I think these emails look so dubious that many major email providers classify them as spam, likely owing to user reporting.

"America's Finest News Source." To be fair, they are not aiming high. Love that Onion.

When the "any idiot can be a lawyer" one started, it was interrupted by an ad...for a law firm. Oh, algorithms....

tv shows love chinese take out boxes because of continuity issues. with the big white boxes they don't have to worry about food levels changing between shots, and most of them are empty so they don't have to actually worry about food on the set. Its a simple short hand for this box is full of food,

@Zeylo89

2 ай бұрын

Interesting

Fun fact about Chinese takeout in shows and movies! It’s used so often because they don’t need to keep continuity between shots, because you can’t see inside the boxes. With other food you have to make sure it looks the right amount of eaten for each bite taken on screen.

I was part of a class action lawsuit against ITT. I was just informed I'm only owed $8 which the court says doesn't have to be paid out. But I was told not to worry because I might get it in a later phase of payouts.

I love watching him react to these headlines with such emotion while I don’t know enough to find most of these headlines funny

US legal system is sooo convoluted that those headlines might actually come true in the near future

@p.z.arnott2329

Жыл бұрын

I wouldn't be surprise if they do

@aaronmccullers384

Жыл бұрын

Some have already

@phineas81707

Жыл бұрын

I wonder what would happen if someone discovered there was a misprint of the Bar exam and anyone who took the test that year was automatically passed.

I actually got 80 bucks sent in the mail from a class action lawsuit because I was underpaid in a job. It was preceeded by a letter, and I didn't have to sign up for anything. But I also have a friend who's on the class action websites and has gotten some money for product recalls and stuff. Also, there's a great Jewish folktale about someone arguing with G-d and winning.

@cericat

Жыл бұрын

There's a lot of those stories in Judaism, other religions could learn a lot from the open questioning of scripture which is where the stories seem to derive from, the need to address complications of interpretation, etc. More critical examination of beliefs helps people understand their faith, and also helps people figure out if they truly believe or not.

@aaronmccullers384

Жыл бұрын

@@cericat Honestly, I would just settle for people actually taking the time to read their own holy texts. So many "issues" people have due to their religion are either not really something their religion cares about or is something that their religion actually says the opposite of what these people are saying.

@MegaFortinbras

Жыл бұрын

I'm reminded of a joke. A numbers of Talmudic scholars are arguing about one point. One of them argues for one interpretation, the others all disagree with him. Suddenly, there is a voice from the heavens, "Rabbi Moishe is right!" There is silence for a moment, then someone says, "OK, Moishe, that's two on your side!"

@cericat

Жыл бұрын

@@aaronmccullers384 Oh I'm aware, I left the church as a kid because questioning the difference between scripture and what they said got me in hot water. Better understanding and the willingness to discuss we might get away from the Christofascism we see so often.

@fihyrulesmonado7659

Жыл бұрын

@@cericat Absolutely agree. Understanding both your own faith and others’ would fix SO many misunderstandings. I can’t believe how many times I’ve had to defend my faith from accusations that don’t make any sense if you actually understand the doctrine. And it’s not like it’s complicated biblical scholar level stuff either, just a simple understanding of a few key concepts.

8:12- Thank you for the “Liar, Liar” reference; good laugh to start my day with! 🤭

As a former legal assistant (I now work solely in document production - no more filing for me!), I can tell you now, that there were a small group of Chinese restaurants that I used to order food from for corporate lawyers staying late at night to work. There were many times that I ended up joining them (to revise closing documents, :P ). LOL

Everyone: Wow, that Ally McBeal one is pretty on point. Legal Eagle: That one is funnier now than when it was first written. Seriously, would have never thought to date check that article to see that it predates the insanity.

@jmspiers

Жыл бұрын

The Onion is amazing at predictions. Their article titled "‘Paw Patrol’ Writers Defend Episode Where German Shepherd Cop Shoots Unarmed Black Lab 17 Times In Back" went viral in the summer of 2020. Most people didn't notice it was actually written in 2018. (I know that wasn't technically a prediction, since unfortunately the article would have been relevant any time since, well, forever. However, the text of the article fit perfectly with the tragic events that triggered protests in 2020.)

The one (almost) class action lawsuit I remember most, didn't actually make it that far. It was back when Sony Online Entertainment ran the game Star Wars Galaxies. Long story short, they pulled a bait and switch on the players of the Creature Handler class who pre-ordered the Trials of Obi-Wan expansion to get a special item that gave bonus levels. Then, two weeks after that expansion came out, fundamental changes were made to the game, including the complete removal of the creature handler class making the necklace completely worthless. Large numbers of creature handler players threatened a class action lawsuit, including some of us (not me) who were lawyers going pro bono. Realizing the number of lawyer players we had running pro bono and that they'd spend more money trying to fight us than it was worth to them, they nipped the class action before it got started by agreeing to give all players who had any points in the creature handler class prior to the expansion a full refund.

@aaronmccullers384

Жыл бұрын

Always be careful with scamming video gamers and/or furries as they are the ones with enough disposable income to actually pursue a lawsuit.

@zenzenulous2243

Жыл бұрын

@@aaronmccullers384 if they have enough money to commission thousands in art, they have enough to hire a good lawyer

After the last few months with the law news that you have been covering it's good to see you smile and laugh, keep it up

This was really fun, it's nice to see you having fun with it

“The people on the Supreme Court are perfect fine human beings” X to doubt

@1985toyotacamry

Жыл бұрын

That age very poorly considering what happened a month ago

@ooooneeee

Жыл бұрын

X

@dongquixote7138

Жыл бұрын

Three of them should be executed as domestic enemies to the Constitution

@playerpage

Жыл бұрын

@@1985toyotacamry He said this July 30th.

@Finkeldinken

Жыл бұрын

X

I got $400 from Facebook and the site was shady as hell. Even when I went back to check the site had been defunct. Was pretty scared I just gave all my info to a scammer until the check showed up

My favourite will always be the first one. It doesn't show here, but the picture of the dude they chose for the headline is perfect.

Hey bud, just wanted to state an otherwise lost comment. I just realized you were "the" legal eagle, and finally realized your channel is both high quality and highly informative. I probably spent 5 years hearing your channel name, and never gave it a shot. It turns out this is amazing, and I'm a fool. :/ Absolutely amazing channel, thanks so much for what you do.

I definitely wouldn’t call several of the justices “perfectly fine people”…

@Kamibandit

Жыл бұрын

That’s what I’m saying lol.

@dongquixote7138

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, three of them don't give a shit about the plain text of the Constitution.

@jmspiers

Жыл бұрын

Something tells me that he doesn't want to burn bridges...

@michaellovely6601

Жыл бұрын

Clarence Thomas being a prime example of this.

@pizzlerot2730

Жыл бұрын

​@@michaellovely6601 came here to say this. I can't think of much that could be more soul-crushing than to make history becoming a Supreme Court justice as a liberal black woman, only to have to work with Clarence Thomas. Like jfc man, dude is almost single-handedly setting both the country and black people back 150 years...

Has it not occurred to you the websites for the class action payouts are literally the people doing the payouts so even if they are acting in good faith to actually fulfill the terms of the legal agreement/obligation in the best case scenario at the very least they are the ones who bear the costs of maintaining the website or otherwise informing the relevant parties which the more who answer the more they then payout... Their motivation for maintaining a website that doesn't look poorly produced at best and a scam at worst is not exactly high.

I love how class action lawsuit ads always say “You may be entitled to SUBSTANTIAL financial compensation” when in reality it may be 2 bucks haha

You should do a video on the final emergency motion to dismiss about the Alex Jones phone discovery issue.

I wouldn't describe Clarence Thomas as a "perfectly fine human being".

@gaiusjuliuspleaser

Жыл бұрын

He's the current subject of the Behind the Bastards podcast. Good listening.

@curiousworld7912

Жыл бұрын

Nor, Samuel Alito. At least one other name comes to mind as a possibility...

@jamesmason7979

Жыл бұрын

Sonia Sotomayor tried to describe him that way. I wonder if she regrets doing that. 🤔

@richardarriaga6271

Жыл бұрын

In irony, I would. Like "perfectly fine" people demonstrating with Tiki torches at Charlottesville, VA.

@gaiusjuliuspleaser

Жыл бұрын

@@curiousworld7912 Let's just say there's been a lot of shitty people in the US Supreme Court...

Voting to take away a coworkers rights is a toxic working environment tho.

@iamzid

Жыл бұрын

you're fired.

@Abyzz_Knight

Жыл бұрын

Try and maintain workers rights now that you don't have a job' f*cker 😎

@anergyboy2192

Жыл бұрын

Yeah I'm not sure I agree with a majority of the justices being 'decent human beings'.

@dongquixote7138

Жыл бұрын

That would almost be as bad as voting to take away everyone's rights.

I actually filled out a claim form for a class action lawsuit last year and this past June, I received a settlement check for a little over $1700. I was genuinely surprised by the amount I received!

3:04 about 3.2 trillion additional years, in fact. Good deal.

Your informative and amusing comments of law need support for the entertainment it has brought me. The laws in my country, Sweden, may differ but it is still fun.

@annaelizabzth

Жыл бұрын

Would you recommend Sweden to Americans? I’m looking to GTFO, since America is beyond saving.

@Millenia3D

Жыл бұрын

@@annaelizabzth Nordic countries are some of the best to live in! I'm looking forward to moving back to Finland at some point (Currently in the UK)

@annaelizabzth

Жыл бұрын

@@Millenia3D Would people judge me for not being able to speak Finnish well? I find it very phonetic, but grammatically it’s… HELL. 😂

@Millenia3D

Жыл бұрын

@@annaelizabzth doubt it, younger people especially speak pretty fluent English and even my parents can hold good conversations in it :) especially if you're in Helsinki - when I last visited there seemed to be a fair few English speakers around With how difficult our language is the vast majority wouldn't expect you to know any but on the other hand also appreciate any effort towards learning even if it's just a few phrases

OMG..... The whole bit about class action lawsuit websites looking like scams is absolutely accurate to a crazy point. This is EXACTLY what happened with both the Doordash and Postmates lawsuits in California. Their websites were so crappy and suspicious that many drivers simply did not file thinking they were scams, which I admit was quite beneficial to the rest of the drivers who did because it means there's more money for them. Hilarious.

7:49 - how many lawyers are “created”? I’m onto you, Devin!!! We all know that lawyers are actually just robots created in factories!

I've been rewatching Boston Legal lately and man, I'd love to see you react to some of its episodes.

I wish you reacted to the Onion video, "Supreme Court: Death penalty 'totally badass' " It's my favourite Onion material of all time

Definitely thought I was getting scammed from a class action website, I wonder if the Chinese food trope is because they can show the containers without having to show the food itself thus helping with continuity and just having a lot of food in shot.

I feel like there might be some people who disagree with Justices Kavanaugh and Thomas being "perfectly fine people", even setting aside their politics. 😬

@dongquixote7138

Жыл бұрын

Those people are racists

I love the purple suit and grey tie! One of my favorite color combos.

I’m surprised you’ve yet to react to the movie “Philadelphia” with Denzel Washington and Tom Hanks (unless I am missing it on your playlists). Please do that one soon! Oh, and “Primal Fear” with Ed Norton and Richard Gere is another good one.

There is no way any normal person could tolerate Brett, Amy and Samuel in any workplace.

@doinked7465

Жыл бұрын

What’s not to like about Brett?

@sarahsmith840

Жыл бұрын

@@doinked7465 so many sexual harassment lawsuits.

@j-rey-

Жыл бұрын

And Clarence and Neil. I immediately came down to the comments to make sure someone else said this.

@GroundThing

Жыл бұрын

No member of the supreme court is a "normal person", though. As they say, it's a big club, and you ain't in it.

@kaysidegamer5996

Жыл бұрын

@@j-rey- quick! Hold no opinions! We can’t upset the status quo!

the one you opened with really hit the spot for me (getting off on a technicality)

funny thing about the life extension one is that the time it would take to file the things needed would probably take more that 45 seconds anyway

"I'm sure the people on the supreme court are fine people" rare instance of your institutional bias showing pretty hard here.

@Torlik11

Жыл бұрын

yeaj, I don't think any of the judges who voted to overturn roe v wade can be considered "fine people". They may look proper and seem polite but stabbing someone politely never made it hurt less.

@alexnorth3393

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, I think Brett is an awful person. Same with the Handmaiden and sexual pervert Thomas.

@gaiusjuliuspleaser

Жыл бұрын

@@Torlik11 Throwback to that time Clarence Thomas lied about his sister being on welfare just to score some brownie points with hardline conservatives.

@i3d3

Жыл бұрын

Oh yeah they're all crazy lunatics who want to take away our rights! Our rights to express our thoughts freely. And our rights to arms ourselves. And our rights to self-determination. And the rights of the states we live in. How dare they?

@blugaledoh2669

Жыл бұрын

@@Torlik11 Roe vs Wade ought to overturned since it is not cover under the constitution and honestly read like a legislation. The Supreme Court interpret the laws, they don't create law so this should have never been their problem to begin with.

My daughter says current events have morphed The Onion from satire into a crystal ball.

He had so much fun with this one

I like the idea that Devin just has this channel because he is a super law nerd and likes to talk about law stuffs

I believe you need to look up Advocate Teffo from South Africa. His antics currently are completely wild - our Legal Practice Council legit sent out an email of "no reason for this whatsoever, not caused by anyone in particular, but don't do these things". And that was BEFORE he accused the Judge of using witchcraft

@wingracer1614

Жыл бұрын

Hm, a judge using witchcraft? Could that be a counter to the Chewbacca defense?

@mrdre3628

Жыл бұрын

Tbf the judge could have been using witchcraft, it doesn't have to be effective to be witchcraft....I am not a lawyer, but I have a PhD in hocus pocus voodoo science according to my ex's Dad and it is my professional opinion that the judge in question was using witchcraft and furthermore was doing it badly enough to get caught which is an extra charge.

Ohh really struggled with "most people on the Supreme Court being perfectly fine human beings" When the Supreme Court asks... Hit them with that one!

@cl8804

Жыл бұрын

hint: "most"

@blugaledoh2669

Жыл бұрын

What are you referring to?

@teopalafox

Жыл бұрын

Three of them need a kick in the ass.

@garwynrosser8907

Жыл бұрын

@@blugaledoh2669 1:24

@rjones197

Жыл бұрын

I was going to comment but here it is. They are NOT mostly good people, directly because of their politics and habit of ignoring precedence.

@2:15 - not only do they often look like a scam, the emails often get auto-filtered as spam!

The Onion is so hilarious! Nice job finding these.