Non-Negotiable's in Christian Dating & Marriage
CHRISTIAN COUNSELING - betterhelp.com/nateandsutton10
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My husband and I met in college, we went to a private Christian university. I was shocked at how many guys went to that school who were the OPPOSITE of a Godly man. When I met my husband I thought he was too good to be true. I had never met a man who held himself to such standards of Godliness- kindness, respect, chivalrous, loyalty, dated for marriage, communication, saved himself for marriage, longed for kids, prayed with me, etc. He is my absolute best friend in the entire world. People think we’re “too” lovey dovey or hallmark-y but we don’t care. We’re simply best friends in love. ♥️🤷🏼♀️🙏🏻
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
That’s awesome!
@AbbyMcGuire23
Жыл бұрын
And now pregnant with our first baby boy! 😍
@Mojojojo335
Жыл бұрын
@@AbbyMcGuire23 how old are y’all and how long have you all been married
@whiteangel3824
Жыл бұрын
That’s amazing, Our Almighty God bless you all!
@nadirahtherealtor5173
Жыл бұрын
❤️❤️
I looked for someone who: -willed for my best (Cared about my best interest) -wanted children -helped me grow closer in my relationship with God -took his role as the man in our relationship seriously (took responsibility in that role) -was honorable and trustworthy I was 30 when I found my wonderful husband. He treats me like a lady and 5 kids later still tells me I’m beautiful and he loves me every single day. I prayed for him and God delivered him to me. It took patience and time but God is so faithful and wants the right match for us.
@tranaenewsome6453
Жыл бұрын
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
@linahmwoleka1272
Жыл бұрын
❤️❤️❤️ May God bless you
@amaliadiaz314
Жыл бұрын
How did you pray for him?
@Ms_Chie
Жыл бұрын
Woo thank you I needed this
@jenniferm8349
Жыл бұрын
How do you handle gender roles when looking after the kids ?
This video is a breath of fresh air, realizing im not crazy or legalistic for having such standards. 😊
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
Thank you!!
@deaguirrrock
Жыл бұрын
Not at all! I'm told the same 🙄 hold to God's standards, not man's 🧡
@amesj95
Жыл бұрын
Amen !! I an 39 and still a virgin and waiting . I really appreciate this video!
@Mary-sp9dp
Жыл бұрын
Yes
@slurpslurpslurpslurpslurps4613
Жыл бұрын
@@amesj95 your lucky still having that viriginity
1. Christian 2. Loving/Merciful 3.Leader 4. Funny 5. Prayer Warrior 6. Wants to wait until marriage
Non-negotiable: having the same ideas on how they want to raise their children. & the standards with their parents and holidays:) -also I liked how y’all brought up that you need to “be your standards” to attract the person you want
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
Ooo yeah those are good ones!
@apracity7672
Жыл бұрын
What would be a holiday non-negotiable standard for you?
@Brookebiscuit
Жыл бұрын
@@apracity7672 I meant holidays with family:) Like for example: which grandparents would they go to on Christmas.. it would be hard if it’s an expectation to only spend time on one side of a family. :)
@libnabarron6000
Жыл бұрын
What else would you consider non-negotiable?
I love the skits! Me and my husband met in high school before we were both saved, so we were in a relationship after high school whenever we weren't saved, and there weren't expectations which exposes the world we live in and how many lies we are told growing up! Without the armor of God we will not make it. After Jesus saved us both in different ways we went to church and got baptized a day before our 3 year dating anniversary. We started over and waited for marriage and started to get to know each other for the first time because we had been sober for the first time in 3 years after giving our lives to Christ. Now we have been married for over a year, and will never be the same! We admire your channel and will raise our kids to save themselves, and train them to live their lives for Jesus, we want to give them the life we didn't have. I love to see y'all do what y'all do❤
@thatoolga
Жыл бұрын
Loved when you said "Without the armor of God, you won't be able to make it" 🔥🔥🙌🏽🙌🏽
Maybe one of my non negotiables is that they have an active/healthy lifestyle. It shows me that you take your health seriously and you take care of yourself. If you can have self control in what you eat and have discipline in exercising, I feel like that shows you respect yourself and your body. Also if you’re disciplined and strong physically, you’re more likely to have better mental clarity/strength. Which is important. So how they take care of themselves is a non negotiable for me.
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
@tranaenewsome6453
Жыл бұрын
Yes!!! I want to work out WITH you, not drag you along.
Also non-negotiables to add: - someone who is hard-working and committed. - someone who follows through with promises and doesn't go back on his word - someone who is consistent in the way he treats people - someone who puts God first and family second - someone who is ambitious but always trusts in the Lord to direct his path
@jenniferm8349
Жыл бұрын
Definitely
@stevemacinnis5000
Жыл бұрын
Wait, I think you're missing a couple. You gotta make sure the man has X-ray vision, and has a pHD in clinical psychology. Another non-negotiable is that he has to be well-versed in house chores as both spouses must share the responsibilities. And if he can't lift a car in case you get trapped underneath one in an accident some day, then forget it. As for the women.....she needs to be beautiful.
As a person who never wants kids, I appreciated that part SO much, where you talked about kids/no kids should be a non-negotionable and people should not try to change us and not getting into a relationship with us, thinking we'll change our minds. Thank you for this ❤️
@TropicalRedFlower
Жыл бұрын
However, that is dangerous, I'm talking about being married and not wanting kids so bad, because you know, in marriage people is constantly being intimate and there's a possibility that can happen, then, what will you do? Killing the baby is a sin, giving it in adoption when you have a home, finances and don't even know what kind of future awaits for them and you are enjoying your life, it's wrong too. So, I think that if a person is so opposed to the idea of children they should also be opposed to be having sex, because that's a possibility and an irreversible one. God bless.
@alwynmanalil426
Жыл бұрын
Birth control?
@kisskiss6866
Жыл бұрын
@@TropicalRedFlower There are multiple forms of birth control, and if you're combining them, the chances of getting pregnant is very, very, very low. Also, I see absolutely nothing wrong, not even Biblically, with adoption, if pregnancy does happen. What would be better for a child? To grow up with their blood family who despise them and never wanted them, or to grow up in a family where they aren't blood relatives but the child is wanted and so loved? I don't see why would it be necessary for a child-free person to live in celibacy and without love and marriage just because parenthood is not their calling
Kinda scary………… you don’t seem to enjoy each other and you delete all negative comments 🙁
Thank you guys for encouraging me in my process of figuring out what I want. This is something I’ve been working through for a while. Love you guys and your foundation on biblical truths ❤
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
So glad we can help 😊
Wow! This video came at exactly the right time for me. I definitely needed the reminder that there's a difference between a Christian guy and a Christian guy who displays spiritual leadership.
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
6:55-7:01 “we tend to attract our standards” that’s probably the most cut and clean thing that spoke to me. It’s SO true, and I like, paused the video and was like… THAT MAKES SENSE. I remember being in high school wanting to date certain guys, and NOW coming into a 2 year relationship where we want to get married next year, I see that I’m completely different. I have Christ, hopes, and goals of my own and my partner!
The skit in the beginning was HILARIOUS! Agreed with your non-negotiables. I would add I want him to be kind, generous, and prosperous! Bonus have an appreciation for the arts and like to travel! Tfs
What a beautiful marriage and family you have. Thank you for sharing your life with us. I can only imagine how hard you work to bring us relevant and helpful content. Thank you!
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
Thank you 😭 so sweet!
Thank you so much guys for this video, it certainly level up my no-negotiable list!! I haven’t watched your videos for a while now, Parse God for your family and how much your children have grown…xo
It’s not a make or break to have a skit, but I am with Nate on this one, they are so much fun!!!
I have always desired all these and more as nonnegotiables but it’s soo… hard to find such men with sound christian values in our world of today even in the church. I still chose to believe God’s word stands forever and the Lord would honor our desires as we say them to him. Thank you for sharing this. You have strengthened my faith and resolve and reminded me of God’s love for his own. God bless you both
Loooool I love the skits/slides that you added at the start, it definitely sets the tone, but it also shows your love, personalities, and the expectations for the type of dynamic relationship you have 😍😍
I love the skits 😅 they are so funny I enjoy watching how hard it is for you guys to keep a straight face, also loved the rest of the videos! Keep em coming.
Love to see how God works through you both. Have a blessed days guys!
The skits are awesome!😂 I love the purity of your hearts. Reminds me of the people I run with! Keep up the good work❤
Excellent video by the way! As for the first point, I would say that what a person should really want is to be in a relationship where their lover respects their faith. I have seen relationships where two people were both believers going into the relationship but did not respect each other's faith wholeheartedly. Then I have seen relationships where only one person was a believer, and the two stayed together, which by biblical terms the non-believer was then sanctified by the marriage to the believer. I myself married an unbeliever who later gave her life to Jesus christ. Today we have a Godly household where we pray on a daily basis. I could have simply wrote her off but I trusted God through the whole process and we now have not only a loving marriage but six blessed children. 🙏🏽💯
Great video guys!!💖 and yes the skits are just hilarious! We love them😂🤣
Oh the funny intros are one of the things I look forward to the most ! This intro made me laugh out loud. Even just Sutton struggling to keep a straight face makes me smile 😆 Keep it up please ! The humor is highly needed these days. Laughter is the best medicine and especially from good fun humor like this :)
When he put his finger on her lips when she was talking about Biden...whew chile.
i love all your videos! thank you for your honesty and openness, i have learned so much from you both!
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
An answered prayer for us! 💛
The intros are always highly creative et entertaining, lol! Solid video; being equally yoked et being willing to be or give what one requires is important, 🥰💕💗💗🙏🏽
Thank you for sharing these things, God really honors you for it❤️
I love the skits you do 😂, Nate’s right.. gets us in the mood for Nate and Sutton
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
Skits are so fun! Please keep them! Thanks for your videos, encouragement and insights!
My sweet husband always opens my car door, and I gladly wait for him to do it! I loved this video. Don't settle is the best advice I could give, too! I love your sweet relationship.
Thank you for this video! It keeps me hopeful that my non negotiable are not too rigid or “demanding”! I pray I find someone who has the same non-negotiable. God bless you guys 🥰
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
@stevemacinnis5000
Жыл бұрын
Hey honey, I'm a 25-year-old Christian man looking for marriage. Of course we'd take our time, but let me know if you're interested. God bless. 🙏❤
I wasn't big on the intro, then again, I'm not in my most joyful season as I'm just searching for answers, but Nate, if you like doing the intros then I say go for it, seeing as you were smiling through that tells me everything I need to know. I enjoyed the video, it's comforting to know that there are people out there that share the same ideals, praying I find "the one" someday.
Hey Nate and Sutton. I just wanted to say thank you for a video you did a long time ago (which is why I'm subscribed) about how you guys met and what you went through before and after meeting each other. God used you to change my thinking about relationship and marriage a lot. God specifically used Sutton to inspire me to make a list of what I want in my future wife. I loved this video and pretty much all the videos you do. Keep up the good work and God bless you both and your family. I hope to one day get married and then meet you guys to tell you our story.
I love the skits!!!! also this was great advice. I'm in college right now, and I have non negotiables but you did give me something to think about. love you guys and your family so much! 💛💛
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
💛💛
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
The skits are so fun haha definitely gets me more excited to watch your videos🙌
Old married lady here....well, 46.... But great advice Nate and Sutton. I had a mental list and knew what I wanted and stuck to it. The Lord blessed me with a lovely husband. I would say, compliment and always say thank you...appreciation means a lot. Ask the hard questions early. Set up boundaries and don't postpone marriage for years and years when you know you've found the one. PS. Sutton, how do you always look so wonderful having three children. You look lovely x
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
Yes those are good ones! And thank you for the sweet compliment 🥰
THANK YOU for your opinions. The skits did add humor, flair, and comedic relief. Sporadic skits are cool! GOOD JOB NATE and SUTTON!
SO grateful for you guys and this video!!! (Also I love the skits👏🏻😂❤)
Yes such good stuff! I was told and always try to remember not to lower my standards, but lengthen my patience!
Thank you for your videos, they really help me to know that I’m not alone ❤
I agree with your non-negotiables + I enjoy the goofy skit entrances because I like to laugh too. They lighten the mood on some topics that may seem to come across more heavy. Keep it up you two!
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
*The skit 🤣. My addition is living separately before marriage - that's non-negotiable.*
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
Yes that’s a great one!
I like the skits! I’m a visual & logical person, so seeing something play out in different ways -helps!
Love the skits!! Keep doing them! And also great video!! 👏🏻👏🏻
love y'all so much! such great advice!!! and YES keep doing the skits!
Thank you both 💞 This is inspiring!
The beginning was funny, and your intro is adorable!😂😊
I’m only 3:30 min in…with that said, I’m also someone who did not understand how important it was to marry a Christian man. My marriage of 30 years has been very difficult due to not being equally yoked, however I do believe God meant for my husband and I to be married. He became a Christian 9 years ago and the past five years he has truly began to understand his role as a Christian husband and father! THANK GOD!!
Everyone out here trying to be Jim Bob & his wife but only end up looking like Josh & Ann Duggar.
Great list! I just happened to come by this when I was praying about my life.
They’re fire! Keep the skits coming!
obviously the same as nate & sutton- but some additions for me are: •doesn't smoke/vape/anything of the sort & is not too frivolous with alcohol consumption. •works out! I love the gym and training, so I'd love for my hubby to be active one day. obviously I don't expect abs or anything like that, he should just prioritize health
How do people watch this and say “yes this is what I want in my marriage” find someone you like, this is terrifying. It’s okay to like your partner you don’t have to be annoyed at them and hate them, that’s not normal.
@joyricherson4570
11 ай бұрын
Uh?
This was so good. Thank you for this 😊
I love the beginning! Keep it up❤❤❤
I love the skits!!! thank you for all these video's
I love the skits; keep ‘em coming! Also - side note: My 23 year old son is a single Christian waiting and praying to find his Christian wife. He has very similar non-negotiable standards. It can be a bit frustrating for him at times…the waiting and searching part.
@stevemacinnis5000
Жыл бұрын
Yeah, I'm 25 and I'm doing the exact same thing. If I could share some advice with your son, I'd say, you only need one, you only need to do this once. Once you find a good one, you'll have her the rest of your life and you'll never need to wait again. If you don't wait and just settle for anything that's in your area at the time, you'll get involved in unnecessary drama and even if you do get married, it won't last. In the grand scheme of things, what's 25 years? If it takes 25 years to find a solid one, you could enjoy the next 60 with her! God bless. 🙏
I like the skits bro, keep em coming!
This was really good! And I love skits!😂❤️
I love the skits please make more ❤️ I say this because I love them and because I am more of a visual learner and I think that would help other people too, plus the are funny and fun and relatable and fun to watch and they seem fun to do as well so take that Sutton 😂 with much love 💙
Loved the intro and the whole video tbh! Great non-negotiable's
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
Thanks so much, this was such a refresher for me, I made a lot of these mistakes in past dating before I realized why I was attracting the wrong men. I also realized God was speaking to me in past dreams I had about ex bf's because he does not want me to make the same mistakes. Can you guys make a video about compromising in relationships? God bless 🙏
I lovee y'all point & the skits, please keep them
Loved this video! You guys are such a inspiration! ❤
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
Love the skits! Another non-negotiable for me is someone who is mindful of their health
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
I love the skits keep them coming!
I love how Nate & Sutton never lead us astray! 😊❤
@nateandsutton
Жыл бұрын
💛💛
Love the skits, kept me watching honestly 🎉
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
Thanks for the vid..The skits are hilarious btw😂
I don't mean to hate at all, but how can this guy be a virgin if he had another wife and a daugther just some years ago? I think maybe he has a twin brother. Is it possible? A guy looking exactly like him had a channel with his wife Diana and his daugther Divina. They have got to be family if not the same person
The skits are hilarious and dumb! I know what you both mean cause I love them but I’d be like you Sutton with doing them and thinking they were dumb. They’re great! 💕 Thank you for your encouragement in this specific area!!!
I love the skits in the beginning!!
This is just what I needed to hear in my fresh relationship :)
Oh my gosh the skits in the beginning 🔥 Definitely need more of those haha
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
The skits are really fun. Please don't stop!
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
I love the skits, I actually went to watch them a second time, it really made me laugh and made my day 😂
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
Love your videos as a Christian they are very information. Much love all the way from South Africa
I love this! And love the skits 😂
Finding a Christian leader and seeing their discipline to God is so important! It’s easy to just check off the box when they say they are a Christian and ignore any other red flags that they don’t walk in the faith. I didn’t think a man like my husband existed but he did so don’t lose hope! Btw I like the skits 😂
@laura_p17
Жыл бұрын
He is not my ex, we are still married.
Great video and I love your skits!
sweet nate && sutton , wow ! i absolutely love love love the intentionality behind this sweet sweet video . this was such a pure video that reflected the love of Jesus ! these non - negotiables were such beautiful attributes that come wholeheartedly from the Lord . always && forever lean into Him && His beautiful goodness ! 🕊️🤎
Love this ❤!!! Thank you for your video like this!!!
@franklinderek1694
Жыл бұрын
Hello, how are you? How's the weather condition over there?
After I saw the intro, IMMEDIATELY SUBSCRIBED!!!!
Very nice video! It's nice to hear other people have the same values when looking for a spouse. And unrelated, but Nate reminds me of Seth Meyers
Was so shocked to see a skit at the beginning 😄 Nate said "what r u doing?" so I'm like what r u doing?!😄😄
“I don’t believe in dating 2 girls at the same time”. Is there a video on this aspect of your relationship? Thanks for the encouraging content! 😊
Truly appreciate this video and the points discussed. This serves as a reminder as I swipe left and right in online dating. There may be a plethora of men but I should never compromise and settle because he looks good/hot. And, not just because one says/labels himself a Christian means that he is a genuine believer. 👌💯
More red flags than a bullfighter's pit in that relationship
man i missed watching your videos been a couple months sense i tuned in
A great video would be the difference between a controlling relationship in contrast to a healthy relationship. I saw multiple controlling marriages (including my brother’s…his wife controls his and their kids’ every move) where one spouse controls the other in an unhealthy way. Before my brother got married, it was clear he was her everything. I think he liked it then, but now it turned into a controlling relationship. I think she controls him because of her fear of him not being with her anytime he’s not working. She put in his head, you’re away so much for work that if you’re not home with me and the kids all the other time, you’re not a good family man. And they are the tightest helicopter parents. I’m allowed to play with my nephew in the backyard or basement of my parents’ house with them in the family room upstairs. But that’s the farthest away I’m allowed. Anyway, my non-negotiable is don’t expect me to control you, and don’t control me. Keep that happy balance in the relationship.
@rachface4119
Жыл бұрын
Why do you need to be alone with your nephew to have fun with him? Why not go on trips WITH the parents and child?
Love these tips!
This is my non negotiable raising your voice and road raging. I know some women who tolerates this kind of outbursts from their spouses or dating partner
love the skits!!
Thanks for sharing! Think it's important for all young couples to know what their non-negotiables are! P.s Loved the skits haha
Loved this video, thank you!
This is a video that is so encouraging for young people just starting out. Or maybe young couples with young children to bring them up teaching these kinds of goals. For me 59 yr old that didn't have a Dad at all in my life and a Momma who didn't teach me along the way. I have been the total opposite and I can 100% agree it doesn't end well at all. You are both truly blessed and God is using you in a mighty way to encourage others.
Love you guys! What kind of camera is that. Looks neat! God bless you guys!
This video was so good thank you!!!!