DON’T FORGET TO HIT THE LIKE BUTTON MY LOVES ❤️

@Loviethecreative

2 жыл бұрын

Breeny, can you share what kind of hair you're wearing? The store, if it's online? 🤗

@ILLYMUSE

2 жыл бұрын

Beautifully said! But goodness I couldn’t focus on the topic FULLY without addressing the gorgeous vase. WHERE is it from please?! 🥹

@erniechipdouglas9779

2 жыл бұрын

this is so on point i spent my youth beijg treated in such manner by men it also spilled over into my friendships i never said no i always gave to the point of exhaustion. i felt used unappreciated and bitter. i experienced CA and DV also Alcohol abuse in my home i was traumatised by by cruel bullying mother beaten to a point i was kept of school regularly missed school so much seen things i shouldn't have....the trauma i encountered at my mothers hands i attempted to unalive myself at 15 she called an ambulance and made me walk home. my pops i didnt know him when i found out she said he never wanted me that was on top of her telling me she should have aborted me. i went into the world fragile and got abused by men mentally physically and sexually. i ended up with 0 self worth or respect. i finally stayed on my own for 9 years i got into another relationship and started the same paterns previously never cared for my own needs etc focused on him. i ended up drained and empty i had nothing left i closed myself off he just sat there did nothing ive ended up figting back and arguig he now says i no longer care....Ladies men want a door mat they dont want submissive women they want someone they can disresepct period

@dalilar.5614

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for everything you do ❤️ I would love to hear more about Sexual kinks and childhood trauma. I defenetly think most us been through some type of abuse growing up.

@davidbuffer4815

2 жыл бұрын

Breeny you need to sing enthusiastically 😂plz😹💖

He’s not her husband let’s start and end there.

@ablemedia8763

2 жыл бұрын

Trust me, they going get married soon.

@gorgeousfrazier5903

Жыл бұрын

💯

@KayGee_yt

Жыл бұрын

I'm unmarried and young, but my parents are going through a divorce right now after 30 years (I say this to point out how marriage, even one that goes well, isn't necessarily guaranteed to work forever). So I want to ask, what changes with marriage? If a relationship dynamic is abc the entire time your dating, co-habiting, an engaged, why would it suddenly become xyz when you're married?

@britty9156

Жыл бұрын

@@KayGee_yt the answer is an entire essay but to keep short marriage is just different than dating. Typically women take on a lot of extra labor with marriage so it’s very easy to become resentful with just that. Men tend to be a burden in a lot of cases and not actual partners when it comes to raising children and the household duties.

@lanatorim4068

Жыл бұрын

@@KayGee_yt I think this has a lot to do with what is being said. I feel like God has a design for marriage and he intends on being part of the plan. One of the things that happen in a marriage is women are called to submit and men are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church. I believe it starts with understanding what submission is and what love is. When we look at 1Corinthians 13 it describes what love is. That it's patient kind not conceited... Etc. It starts with understanding that love is not just a feeling and understanding that prayer and God play a huge role in the success of marriage and staying away from the worlds view of marriage.

I never have a problem with 'submission'. What I will not 'submit' to is a fool, narcissist, brokenness and foolishness. The biblical submission is to a man who is ready to lead and would NEVER abuse his position...and you are absolutely right about not submitting to a 'boyfriend'. No submission there for me.

@SashaMJay

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly!!

@mololaseye5586

2 жыл бұрын

Facts sis facts🙌🏾

@glecservices3114

2 жыл бұрын

I agree the woman should also be a woman worth leading and loving, to much Jezebel spirits and there is to much said about men, but hardly women looking at themselves and asking are they women worth a man leading, most women are not even virgins yet they want a man to be 100 💯 man and they ain’t virgins, jesus washed peoples feet, if a woman wants to serve him let her serve him who are we to judge what submission is or not, we need to look at ourselves and stop looking at others, love is humble love is pure and most dont walk like that, a woman doesn’t want a broke man so why should a man want a woman who is not a virgin

@aanyamallick7747

2 жыл бұрын

@@glecservices3114 so what if a woman isn't a virgin and she wants a masculine man who is a loving, great leader and a man of god? Breeny herself isn't a virgin, but she is a woman of class. Men want their women to be pure, to have a body that hasn't been touched, yet, they are out here in the streets and been in the streets. Nonsense.. I am personally picky, and I deserve to be that way because men are too.

@alexdalton4535

2 жыл бұрын

the boyfriend comment is ON POINT

"My love heals him" what kind of witchcraft.

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

😭

@InThisSeasonOfFaith

2 жыл бұрын

@@BreenyLee she doesn't know what she's doing. Please keep her lifted in prayer.

@rebekahkingbello9560

2 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣

@InThisSeasonOfFaith

2 жыл бұрын

@@rebekahkingbello9560 it's funny but I'm really sad for her

@nikigracevlogs

2 жыл бұрын

💯 😭😭

In the podcast she mentions she doesn't express her needs to her partner. She said she cries in the shower, rather than expressing it to him. She was surprised to hear the Shan does express her needs and desires to her hubsand. The concept of an egalitarian relationship shocked her. She gives so much emotionally but doesn't receive any emotional support in return. That alone shows how one-sided the relationship is. She also stated she does "everything" for him, meaning he does nothing. It's self-sacrificing, prioritizing him at her own expense. It's co-dependent, trauma response behavior. That isn't truly love or pure giving/care. She's been convinced that her only value in a relationship is to be used and to serve. Unhealthy dynamic and mindset.

@brittanyroberts-blake4461

2 жыл бұрын

This was exactly my issue with that podcast. She isn’t in a great relationship that she thinks she is in

@Cantetinza17

2 жыл бұрын

Man if I'm doing the most for you, I'm gonna need you to listen to my woes.

@JuliaShalomJordan

Жыл бұрын

Bam. 🤜🏼

@Takatukata

Жыл бұрын

I still appreciate her honesty and her vulnerability putting herself out there with her mindset! I think there's a lot to think about for her from the reactions she got.

As a man, I only had to get to 5:56 to know i had heard enough. If a man needs that sort of looking after, he needs a mother not a wife because he is a child. If a normal man ever had a woman treat him like that, he'd think she's overly intense and would lose respect for her as a seperate person. It's a terrible way to be and if i saw those behaviors in my sister or friend I'd be worried about the type of man that would seek her out, it only invites abusive behavior.

@idi.h5460

2 жыл бұрын

Yes sir 👏🏾

@BeautyNBrains86

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you. You get it. 👏🏾👏🏾

@h.9089

Жыл бұрын

I disagree. What she did was being sunmission because her form of catering to her man was made on HER choice to how to submit to him. Not because her man was missing something she was already providing him.

@h.9089

Жыл бұрын

Mother and relationship dynamics are built around the mother's responsibility, not choice. However, Jasmine's specific method of submitting to her man was her choice, not responsibility.

@godfearing.jasira

Жыл бұрын

I honestly agree.

The word “submit” has been taken out of context, it doesn’t mean a woman should enslave yourself and allow someone to make decisions on their behalf, without consulting her. It means that she must honor and commit to the relationship. A marriage does not give him nor her the power to control their partner. The Bible also says a ‘man should leave his family and cleave to his wife,’ it doesn’t mean that he severe ties with his family, it means, his wife takes precedent over his family. Your Husband is not your Father…no one should control or have authority over you. Women, please do not do wifey things to a significant other, honor and protect your heart. Marriage is a partnership, not a dictatorship.

@kawaiicoded4292

2 жыл бұрын

Can I also add that submission is a biblical concept and a lot of these men aren't even christians but, use that one principle out of context. Not to mention that the original translation in greek/roman/ Hebrew I don't even believe they used the word submission but, it was used in a different context. Plus, it says the husband is suppose to submit himself to his wife. The biggest piece these women are mission is they are only suppose to SUBMIT to a HUSBAND who is UNDER THE SUBMISSION OF The Father and Jesus Christ. Most of these men are not.

@phoebeo780

2 жыл бұрын

@@kawaiicoded4292 You're so right

@iwasbornunderwater

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah as long as it goes one way this submission, biblical or otherwise, it's not for me.

@pathip_

2 жыл бұрын

Such mindsets are the ones keeping so many modern women single and frustrated in their lifetime loneliness. You submit to the man as your leader, so he's an authority over you, period! Take it and be a happy wife or leave it and remain an angry single.

@pathip_

2 жыл бұрын

Your husband is the head of the household, so he's your leader and thus has authority over you. It's purely biblical.

I loved this! When me and my boyfriend moved in together a year ago I was doing his laundry, cleaning up after him, buying him new socks and Tees and he flat out told me to stop. Now this is my first relationship where I feel like I’m not drained because he doesn’t allow me to do more for him than he does for me.

@welikelethabo

2 жыл бұрын

I love this❤️

@tlotlorasesia7971

2 жыл бұрын

💗

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

I love that for you ❤️

@glecservices3114

2 жыл бұрын

You got your rewards because you Invested into him, so your getting what you deserve, and good or great man that has a woman investing into him with love and genuineness with no messed up motives will get inspired by your actions and admire you and what to take care of you so well done

@a.pieceofpie

2 жыл бұрын

Damn, that was beautiful to read❣️

I haven’t finished watching but from what I saw the lady has mistaken submission with subservience. I do not believe that you should baby a man or play the role as his mother. The lady said she “studies” her man but stuttered and couldn’t respond when she was asked if her partner studied her😬 you cannot love a man into reciprocity. On top of that, her partner has 7 kids that are not hers and she is not married to him. Why play a wife role for a man who is not your husband?

@Sandrinarhonda

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly but this is the modern woman i guess, if they not doing this. They’re doing some other bs

@stephaniesurratt1473

2 жыл бұрын

You said a WHOLE word!!!!!

@a.b5625

2 жыл бұрын

Some women ain't playing wife roles because it's simply natural to them to be a wife before they're made a wife which is why they have a man they want to be with while other women chat about them 😉

@StarringShameka

2 жыл бұрын

A word! I had to learn that the hard way… you cannot love a man into reciprocity‼️‼️

@mslissa5793

2 жыл бұрын

That's the word I was looking for when I saw that interview....Subservient!

Breeny: What she’s describing isn’t submission, it’s… Me: Slavery Breeny: Service Me: *o h*

@dreamezzey

2 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣🤣

@purpleflows5680

2 жыл бұрын

I agree with your assessment tbh😂

@misguidedpearls7456

2 жыл бұрын

@@purpleflows5680 yup

@nikigracevlogs

2 жыл бұрын

😄😂😂😅

@mahnoormalik5005

2 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

This is why I love the first "Coming to America" because the perfect woman that was willing to do everything for him....caused him to travel the world to find a woman he had to work for. Don't be the gorgeous woman hopping on one foot in a beautiful dress ladies, ever. God bless you Breeney as always for such wonderful and equally wise content. ❤

@anneb6262

2 жыл бұрын

One of my favorite movies!! ❤️he wanted a woman he can choose and find himself. He wanted a challenge.

@nubian77

2 жыл бұрын

THIS!! Literally loved how you broke down that dynamic in Coming to America. It's largely overlooked

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🔥🔥🔥🔥

@TheMakendi

2 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂 excellent

@renee560

2 жыл бұрын

This!!!

The part about sex is so real, I was actually thinking about this the other day, who told us that these things are normal. We’ve adopted other people’s perversions as sexual exploration.

@Clarissaloui

Жыл бұрын

Thank you! I found that part of the podcast quite disturbing. Why would a sane man want certain sexual acts with someone who doesn't even want to engage in it but they're forcing themselves in the name of submission

Stop doing wife duties for a man that’s not your husband PERIOD!!!!

@kenasssss

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly. The problem is that they go and start living together, and it's a huge scam, especially for women, because you'll end up doing those same things that are exclusive for a husband, not a boyfriend, and they'll expect that from you because you share the same space. Basically selling yourself short.

@Sandrinarhonda

2 жыл бұрын

@@kenasssss exactly don’t cohabit with none of these men . Idc if they’re your fiancé don’t live with him and tempt yourself.

@a.b5625

2 жыл бұрын

Or just admit half of you ain't capable of wife duties hence why you think it's a special perk...you people think you can do relationships with half input and it will lead to upgraded relationship statuses lol..no like anything worth having in life you have to put work in if you want the best outcomes ...simple

@kenasssss

2 жыл бұрын

@@a.b5625 You totally missed the point. This is something determined and founded by God, the creator of the universe, not about what is "normal" by society. It's not that they aren't capable or willing, but of lot of women do that and receive not much in return, not even marriage even though some already have kids together, which is a huge responsibility. Why is it so easy and normal to have kids outside of marriage, but it's mind boggling when you want a marriage commitment before all that? That's what's crazy. The truth is that sex before marriage is a sin, the truth is that you should only being doing wife duties to your HUSBAND, not boyfriend who's not ready or unwilling or even bothered to step up in life with you. This is not just a paper for society, it's a spiritual act, a spiritual vow. As wife, your duty to your Husband is more elevated than your duty to your boyfriend. Girlfriend/boyfriend relationships can be severed quickly, you pack your stuff and leave - over. It's different in marriage, the weigh of responsibility and commitment is larger, you can't just bail, call it a day and bounce, the love is greater, not just emotions, but actually compromising. All that is mostly reserved to marriage - not dating, not sex with benefits, true, true Godly marriage. Not fake, counterfeit marriages and "evolved" 21st century "normalized" relationships. This is how the deal really is. And we're not talking about your inadequacy to be a husband, if you took it personally, that's on you, but this is the reality. Take it to God if you don't like it.

@a.b5625

2 жыл бұрын

@@kenasssss unfortunately I don't read into religion to much especially where relationships are concerned...people are people and have their own minds and decisions to make ..again "wife duties" unpacking a bag and running a back is nothing so tell me what are wife duties? Because to me she's just doing normal half decent stuff adults do for each other ...

"You are not being submissive, you are just obeying " THIS! Some guy on fb said his wife better do what he says, and if she opposes, he's not speaking to her until she gives in. Like sir, you are INSANE!! That's not submission. You want control and that's it. You want a "yesman". A servant

@purpleflows5680

2 жыл бұрын

This submission obsession opens the door for a ton of abuse. Submission is willing, not forced, manipulated, or controlled.

@justdanie7613

2 жыл бұрын

@@purpleflows5680 agreed!

@cydneyche1

2 жыл бұрын

@@purpleflows5680 whewwww yes

@adshar20000

Жыл бұрын

The women in the situation is equally insane for tolerating it.

As someone who’s been in a relationship for almost 18 yrs, married for 15, I don’t relate to her idea of a submissive wife sheesh! It’s all about cooperation, reciprocity, having boundaries and respecting an honouring not only each other, but ourselves as individuals.

@lillybethford1915

2 жыл бұрын

N Gabriel, I agree.👍

@yeahrightuhhhuh4931

2 жыл бұрын

Yes! It’s all about love and respect. May your marriage continue to be blessed.

@garrulus3399

Жыл бұрын

This sounds so beautiful :)

"If I love you I can heal you" this is so toxic, you can't fix people

when she said my love can heal, I felt so sad for her. If the mother who birthed the child cannot change him, you are delusional to even think to stand a chance. She needs several therapy sessions not babysitting an adult baby. I said on a different page that she is seeking for approval.

Wooooo lawd! Been there done that. Never again. A man will not like a woman more if she does all this. He either values her or he doesn’t. And yes submitting one to another is for marriage. She didn’t mention one thing that he does…As women our identity should be in God not a man. Prayers.

@akilahj2252

2 жыл бұрын

Hey name twin!!!

@akilahbatyah6505

2 жыл бұрын

@@akilahj2252 Heyyyyyyyyy Akilah J!!!!!!!!!!

@Gree1060

2 жыл бұрын

Did you submit to a good man or bad man? I would argue that the problem is not submission itself, but who you are submitting to. If you submit to a man that is thoughtful, considerate, provides for you, takes care of you, is submission wrong?

@modedejolie799

2 жыл бұрын

I do all that for my man every day of the week. But he’s my husband, we just celebrated our 16 yrs of marriage. I got married when I was 25 yrs old , was still in dental school . There’s nothing wrong with taking care of a good man . Having say that, that’s me taking care of my man. That is not submission. My husband works hard and have a very rewarding but demanding career. He deserves to be pampered, but he also give me back 20 times plus everything I do. I have everything a woman want and most importantly I have a man who love, value and respect me. 16 yrs of marriage to a man who’s successful, I have had no complaints, no side piece, no disrespect and I know there’s plenty temptation . I don’t think people understand what the Bible meant when it says wives submit to your husbands. Husbands love your wife like Christ love the church. I know in this country, when especially modern black American women hear the word submission , they lose their mind. In my opinion, the man got the hardest part of the deal because if you take time to think about it. Christ die for the church, bleeding out on a cross. So when the Bible say for a husband to love his wife the way Christ loved the church. By definition that’s a heck of a responsibility. Submission is allowing a man, a husband to lead. Even when there’s disagreement , even if he make mistakes while leading you. As the wife you trust him enough to know you don’t have to worry . He will lead both of you on the right path , even if he turn left when he was supposed to turn right. He will find his way. But to have that type of trust you have to feel completely safe with that man. Submission in marriage means selfishness, accountability and respect for your husband. In return you have a husband who would take a bullet for his family. He love , provide and protect his woman . .

@brilliantbrownbeauty

2 жыл бұрын

Speak on it, sis. I’ve been to the circus, rode all the rides and won all the 🤡 prizes. Watching THAT interview, I definitely cringed and suffered severe second hand embarrassment. Bless her heart, for real. 🌺

I actually watched the whole podcast because I didn’t want to be speaking out of turn. That being said, I felt deeply for this woman because what she described was neither artful nor submissive, but rather a trauma response. First and foremost submission, the biblical principle is so dreadfully misunderstood and misrepresented. The Bible specifically speaks to wives submitting to their own husbands as that husband submits to God. In essence the husband’s submission is to God and the wive’s submission to the husband is also in service to God. The worship and submission is all to God as the divine creator. What she has described is almost idolatry in that she seeks to cater to/ worship a man. We know from experience that Cam Newton, the man who she is rumored to be dating, is not her husband (so by its very definition what she’s describing cannot be considered submission). Even if we disregard marital status, we’ve also seen through his own actions/ admissions that he is not a man worth even submitting to based off the ideologies he espouses. Jasmine continued to state that she was doing these things that she didn’t necessarily enjoy but believed to be submission because she felt safe to do those things, but as she continued to talk, you could hear that she is anything but safe in this relationship. Well there is so much to unpack in that interview but I don’t think Jasmine should be focusing on submission to a man at this point but rather alignment with and healing through Jesus Christ. I pray she gets what she needs.

@godfirst3709

2 жыл бұрын

Amen!!! So well said 💯

@stepahead5944

2 жыл бұрын

Amen 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

@dorism5304

2 жыл бұрын

That’s word!! It’s definitely idolatry

@feline_star

2 жыл бұрын

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 well said

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

🎯

Half way through that clip, I was like , "No ma'am, that ain't it".....and I am married. Why are these women trying to be GOD to their men? We are meant to be HELP MATES......to our HUSBANDS....I'm with you Ms. Breeny ....this was very stressful to watch, this type of behavior is not sustainable. Period.

“You can never get someone to love you by loving them” 🔥🔥

Couldn't agree more about the *correlation between sexual kinks and childhood trauma.* I think it was Esther Perel who said, 'Tell me how you were loved when growing up and I'll tell you how you love and make love..' something along those lines. If we look around we'll see that most teenage pregnancies, sex workers, and victims of domestic abuse come from turbulent households. And this whole agenda that's being pushed these days telling a woman she doesn't need a man to raise a child isn't helping the situation. Not seen my dad for the last 20 years and I can clearly see how that has impacted the choices I make in life and love. Lots to unlearn.

@eddiy335

2 жыл бұрын

As someone raised by single mom I feel you. I have trust issues when I've never been even been in a relationship and I'm beginning to think that my cynicism about men's intentions is a result of my dad's absence.

@Haysti2000

2 жыл бұрын

I am a totally open kink shamer. I do not understand how we have let it come so far that people (especially women) get slapped around in the bedroom but if it happened outside of that it would be abuse. If your man can hurt you in a sexual context it just means he can hurt you. Period. Like you and Breeny said it either stems from trauma or one is so manipulated by this constant input of "kinks are normal and healthy" that people dont know the harm. It also at best it makes sex a performance instead of an actual way of connection and that just doesnt sit right with me.

@sixteen.candles.4644

2 жыл бұрын

@@Haysti2000 right. Being slapped arouns is crazy.

@Mikirono23

2 жыл бұрын

@@Haysti2000 I agree. I have a kink and always believed it came from somewhere unhealthy. Now, I wish we could all admit this when it comes to this alphabet community as well and people race-playing in the bed room 🥴

@Haysti2000

2 жыл бұрын

@@Mikirono23 yup! Totally agree. I myself thought the most degrading stuff was "hot". The point about kinks is not to hate on people who havent seen the light because I literally was on the other said. Its actually the reason why I feel so strongly about this. I would have never been disrespected like this had I seen someone tell me this before I believed kinks are healthy.

From the intro, you’re absolute correct. I was told a woman who does nothing gets everything! And I declare its true

@l.k.1111

2 жыл бұрын

I concur. It's sad and backwards. But is the reality.

@Coreisus

2 жыл бұрын

Lmao. No it's not.

@shakirabryanijustlovethisg7691

2 жыл бұрын

only a men with feminine masculinity would sit down and allow a woman to treat him like that she is a broken woman she needs help

@StarringShameka

2 жыл бұрын

So very true! It’s so sad the hurdles a man will jump through for a woman who does absolutely NOTHING!

@ton1950

2 жыл бұрын

Wrong, you do nothing, you get nothing.

Apparently they have been dating for a few months only and he hasn't even claimed her yet. When I listened to the interview I thought she was talking about her husband.....

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

Same…

@TheMakendi

2 жыл бұрын

Shaderoom posted a picture of them attending a horse race together in 2020

Self love is definitely a journey. It's taken about 9 years. 7 years & counting I've been truly loving on myself.

I honestly feel for Jasmine because it's obvious that she thought she was doing the right thing as a girlfriend/wife.

"I make it easy for a man to be with me cause I don't do much."

@christinadg

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah on her radio show Jasmine said her relationship has to work, at this point in her life, she can’t start over!

I listened to the entire podcast episode and Shan asked all the right questions. When she asked Jasmine what she’s getting out of it, Jasmine replied that she’s this way regardless of what she gets out of it. However, when Shan asked if she would submit to a broke man, Jasmine said “No!” Which completely contradicts her sentiment of the act of servitude, being her love language, regardless of who’s she’s with. I’m not sure who her man is but he’s clearly someone of stature and has money. To me, this means her love language is completely conditional. She puts herself in positions of servitude to gain love and affection, in hope of filling the voids of past trauma. You have to really listen to the entire podcast to understand why she does what she does. Praying for her and other women feeling the need to “do the most” for love.

@_SheRoseee_

2 жыл бұрын

Made a similar comment and observation! ✨ I hope she sees this video and some of the constructive comments, as a sign to dig deeper. I really hope she has the opportunity to speak to a professional, if not for anything else.. For the unfortunate abuse she experienced in her younger years and the trauma she carries. Praying for her rest.

@prudenceezu9113

2 жыл бұрын

Her man in Cam Newton. He's a multimillionaire

@Megan6772

2 жыл бұрын

@@prudenceezu9113 yup.... this is the most important detail being left out of the chat ☕

@cnbri30

2 жыл бұрын

🗣🗣🗣🎯

@caramelcocoa234

2 жыл бұрын

I disagree. If someone is broke, it is likely someone with no vision, ambition, or leadership. Just because the act of servitude is her love language doesn’t mean it’s an act of stupidity. Women don’t submit to people that can’t lead.

I can't stop thinking about how much these men (husbands or boyfriends) will be laughing to their friends about women who do whatever for their man or listen to them without question. How can he respect you if you have not even one little backbone? Not blaming this woman or others. My man is a dream, a true gentleman and he would be flabbergasted if I acted at all this way. He would never want me to emotionally (or physically) be on my knees for him ever. And you're so on point on the degradation analysis, it's so sad.

@a.b5625

2 жыл бұрын

In what realm are men laughing with their friends about their woman?? In the real world majority of men actually respect their partner and most certainly do not laugh at them or take them for a joke.

@BeyonKasual

2 жыл бұрын

@@a.b5625 if that were true the divorce rates wouldn't be at the levels they are now.

@a.b5625

2 жыл бұрын

@@BeyonKasual that makes no sense as there can be hundreds of reasons why folk divorces ..and again I doubt the majority are laughing about it amongst friends..that's some weird thinking,if a man is mocking you amongst friends he's deffo not your man.. complain, moan occasionally maybe but act as if his Mrs is a clown to impress pals 🤨 maybe teenagers do that

@hurlscoutss

2 жыл бұрын

@@a.b5625 I didn't say anything about all men or even the majority... I wouldn't expect that to happen in a healthy relationship where both partners love and respect the other. I'm pleased it's never happened to you in your relationships or that you haven't noticed it from your friends but it definitely does happen when men don't respect their partner.

@idi.h5460

2 жыл бұрын

@@a.b5625 lol there are plenty of group chats and Reddit forums with men clowning their women

Faith doesn’t worry and value doesn’t beg 🙌🏾 preach Breeny!! ❤️

@bedine.j

2 жыл бұрын

Wow powerful

I absolutely loved the Nigerian sisters breakdown because even if we look at submission in a kink sense the sub actually has all the power, she sets the limits / safe words / boundaries etc. She’s choosing to give, not giving because she is forced physically or psychologically. Also, a truly dominant man would also pour out into her immensely, earning the gift of her submission. Reciprocity is key 🔑

@calikeisha365

2 жыл бұрын

I loved it too! Does anyone know who she is?

@thevalueadder

2 жыл бұрын

@@calikeisha365 She's Jumoke Adenowo, a top architect in Nigeria/Africa. Check her out here en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olajumoke_Adenowo

@nadirahtherealtor5173

2 жыл бұрын

@@calikeisha365 Super powerful and wise woman I have several of her books and yes she is at the top of her game in a male dominated field. Olajumoke Adenowo.

And btw, speaking of loving someone feeling draining… Loving someone literally energises you. Think of your mom, kids, family, good friends. Love is not only an overflow but should rejuvenate even if you are actually doing an energetically depleting act.

@jmelanierenee

2 жыл бұрын

That is a wonderful point. Love is supposed to energize you. Not drain you 🙌🏾

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly!

@jazmina1343

2 жыл бұрын

Well said! 👌🏽

@crystal8242

2 жыл бұрын

You’re right! But people who aren’t in healthy relationships - it’s usually because they had no examples of healthy relationships (come from toxic households)

I watched that clip and it was giving “I’m getting nothing in return and depleting all my energy until I have nothing left to give” vibes. Hopefully she wises up at some point and walks away. Great video, Breeny.

@missmarya747

2 жыл бұрын

Sounds like she broken on many levels. She needs help, she needs God….

:Faith doesn't worry and value doesn't beg"......YESSSSSS SIS!

Any guy that says they want a girl like jasmine 🚩🚩🚩

I’m love that Breeny used the Jesus reference as a comparison of unrequited submissive love, and why it’s dangerous to worship man. We’re willing to sacrifice ourselves for the ideal of a man transformed by our love, from a person who is totally blind to love.

Hopefully if you get the BEST man in marriage, you”ll receive a lot of benefits and power. Submission to the BEST power allows you to actually relax and grow in a different power. You lose unnecessary power and in return gain necessary power. With the WRONG man, you will lose unnecessary power and gain no necessary power.

The biggest mistakes humans make regardless of gender is giving and expecting the same level or any level of reciprocation from those they give to. When you give just do it. Without expecting reciprocation. That way when it is reciprocated by the same person who you gave to. There is a lot more value and the bond is worth a lot and continues to grow. Relationships should never be transactional.

@laurenkirby5390

2 жыл бұрын

Be careful ladies! give to those who love, appreciate, respect and value you. Constantly giving to those who don’t equally poor into you is very draining and can cause feelings of resentment and depression. Know your worth ladies!!

@Mimi-xv6jm

2 жыл бұрын

Reciprocation is part of a healthy relationship, so is healthy boundaries. Yes, the best giving is a gift from the heart with the sole purpose of bringing light to someone’s day, but a strong giver must have strong boundaries.

@Tokirus420

2 жыл бұрын

That is how it should be when a bond/commitment has been established. There's a scripture that goes like 'do not give your pearls to swine so that they do not tear them apart and turn around and trample you also'. You don't give your best to someone who does not appreciate it. And appreciation is shown through some form of reciprocation. Once you get to know someone OVER TIME, you will know that this person is the appreciative type of not. Plus, a man should take the lead in these things.

@mmaya772

2 жыл бұрын

Facts!* @@laurenkirby5390

@Zen-cx5tc

2 жыл бұрын

@@laurenkirby5390 I’ve been with a guy for the last 6 months and did so much and he did absolutely nothing for me. It was draining and eventually I started to resent him. It wasn’t worth.

I did this for three years. Now that i understand my actions I want my time and money back 😩 but I get it. Lesson learned.

@GiovonniTaylor

2 жыл бұрын

Right! Give me my coins back lol...but seriously lesson learned.✅

@CookWithStephh

2 жыл бұрын

I did this for 6 years, had a child. Lesson learned. Ladies learn from me. When a man tells u about himself, believe him. No such thing as loving someone to health.

@Aniexo_

2 жыл бұрын

Same I felt so damn dumb lmfao

@StarringShameka

2 жыл бұрын

Almost 2 years in & im planning my escape as we speak

@phizzy123

2 жыл бұрын

@@StarringShameka me too sis. may we both succeed and claim back our energy ❤️

'When you're not afraid to lose someone, you can speak your mind' had to replay that again and let it sink in.

"Don't put so much responsibility on me to be your peace. You be at peace so that you can bring me peace too." Giiiiirrrrrlllllll, I felt that one! That really hit home for my current status. Thank you for posting.

Let me say...being a good person without boundaries does not get you loved, it gets you used!!! She is devaluing herself. Its sad.

She is a controlling man dream woman. I really pray for her because her doing sexual acts that are painful and being mute about it plus taking care of him as if he is a toddler, is disturbing. This relationship is still in its infancy and she is doing all of this. I pray the Lord intervenes.

@Mimi-xv6jm

2 жыл бұрын

And she’s a willing participant, based on the fact that she’s willing to do all these things for him under the guise of he owes her loyalty, which can be viewed as controlling; especially when the time comes for her to collect his loyalty.

@kenasssss

2 жыл бұрын

And that same man will have a side chick that is nothing like that...

@Myaccount923

2 жыл бұрын

@@kenasssss he literally has 7 kids lol. Smh

@purpleflows5680

2 жыл бұрын

@@Myaccount923 are you serious? He has 7 kids😳

“Faith doesn’t worry and value never begs !! New mantra! Loved this breeny ❤️❤️

“How you see yourself affects every area of your life” So True!

Can we just appreciate how beautiful Breeny is. Always looking fabb ❤

“Some of our kinks… are from trauma” I STAY SAYING THIS. Whyyyyyy do you need to be choked or humiliated to orgasm… like why don’t people ask themselves these questions?

I find it so fascinating that words such as submission and obedience are used when talking about relationships with POC women, particularly black women. It almost makes us sound like children when approaching relationships, so I really found it fascinating when you brought up that childhood trauma is often times linked to sexual kinks later on! I don’t often hear the words submissive and obedient when talking about white women, instead the word compromise is used. Obviously, relationships are not the space to act single, but, I wish there where more examples of black women in media in where men meet them where they are instead of vice versa.

@FocalPointElisa

2 жыл бұрын

This!

@steff6146

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for this. And it also pissed me off to no end that even women like Breeny continue to peddle this notion of “good submission.” The idea that there’s a “right” way to be subjugated. It makes no sense. Submission does not mean partnership. It literally means to be beholden to the authority of someone else, words mean things? Why do women want to be submissive to the whimsy of their husbands? And as a Christian myself, was I not liberated by Jesus Christ? He said neither man nor woman, neither slave nor free, neither Gentile nor Jew. Why would I use Old Testament passages to lead my entire life when I am set free? I will never submit to a man. I’m a Black WOMAN. Not a girl. I’m an adult, not a child.

@steff6146

Жыл бұрын

They expect even women with the utmost of literacy and fortitude to submit. For what purpose? What exactly do I gain by being an obedient sheep to another man, rather than praying for a truly supportive and loving partnership? Black women are so lost. We’re being tricked into “good submission” which is really just benevolent sexism.

@estheradedeji2290

Жыл бұрын

@@steff6146 Your submission to your husband is a way by which you honor God because you are obeying his word.

Wow Breeny, I literally cannot put into words how you help me. Its so difficult to see a woman of faith that isnt seen as backwards or rigid or anything that is usually attributed to religion and its so refreshing. You are such a smart woman and practice faith in an authentic and knowledgeable way. I am a muslim and I learned more form you than from my community. Our religions are in so many ways the same and its why I follow your suggestions and listen to your opinions, my religion told me to respect the ones that came before mine. I experienced some serious religious trauma some time ago and these past 2 years I have been trying to get back on my feet. The reason was abuse of faith in my community and family with special focus on putting me down as a woman. I was always very strong and confident but this totally broke my spirit. This aspect of submission to a husband is something I just could not wrap my head around when it came to my faith. I felt infantilized and like some truth was hidden from me. In this video you revealed to me what I had been looking for and I feel more peace. Again, thank you so much for everything you do.

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

I would love to connect with you Marwa, please send me a DM 💌

@Haysti2000

2 жыл бұрын

@@BreenyLee I dmed you on Instagram, if something else is better let me know

Yes..Saw this on Tik Tok and was like nope! This is not it

When I get home from work I’ll be watching because I knew I wasn’t the only one thinking NO 😂

Finally!! Someone wants to talk about how trauma can come up as kinks!

@misguidedpearls7456

2 жыл бұрын

Soooooo glad she said it

And the part that’s killing me is this is not even her husband oh my gosh what the hell is going on in the world ????it’s like women is fighting in the mud trying to gets sense.

It seems like a lot of us bw is lacking of boundaries, self-respect, and confidence. When are we going to wake up like WHEN THE HELL IS IT GOING TO HAPPEN?! I've had enough of it.

You can't work your way or negotiate your way into someone's heart. By the way Breeny, there's something energizing and exciting about watching you and your videos. Thanks

Breeny ur voice is so important in today’s society! Lots of love from across the pond 💗💗💗

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you lovely ❤️

@sacralbutterfly

2 жыл бұрын

@@BreenyLee 💗💗🤗🤗

@Sandrinarhonda

2 жыл бұрын

Amennn we love our big sis !

Learning my attachment style, how to communicate my needs and boundaries has changed my relationships completely. It has also changed who I am attracted to when I learned about family dynamics and stored trauma in the subconscious mind. Also studying the energy between the masculine and the feminine. I naturally act more masculine if I feel unsafe in the relationship. If I am unsafe I am in survival mode. Even if that’s emotionally. it’s impossible for a women to be submissive and feminine to a man who makes her feel unsafe. Especially in situations were both partners have insecure attachment styles.

@sapphic7779

Жыл бұрын

why did you type out exactly how im feeling wow

This is your most mature video out of all. I've been watching you since the beginning, and never have I ever heard such a good sum-up of everything you've talked about for years! I honestly applaud you for this gem. God bless you, Breeny, quality over quantity. Well done! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much 😊

@BeEnOn

2 жыл бұрын

Very mature & informative 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

I think low self esteem also has to do with submissiveness and wanting to be dominated in the bedroom. You're afraid to take back your control.

I so feel alot of empathy for this lady. Her definition of submission, her idea of love is so so misconstrued. She's likely coming from a place of Adverse childhood Experiences (ACE). Alot of healing is needed for her. May almighty bring the healing that she requires in Jesus mighty name.

@BreenyLee

2 жыл бұрын

Amen ❤️

I’m currently in a relationship without sx (we’re not married or engaged) and I have discovered that not trying to trade myself physically in exchange for a situationship is actually an act of submission. I’m leaving it up to his decision if we have a long term future or not, rather than trying to coerce him into staying with me. Gotta say, it requires a lot of patience and trust in God that this is the right way…

@Summerkillens

2 жыл бұрын

Hmmm, I would beg to differ. I’m not leaving it up to a man to be choosy. I say this without knowing the entire context of you relationship, of course. I think this is ok only when he’s made his intentions clear and is actively seeking to marry you. If not, it’s literally a situationship without sex. Any man carrying you along without letting you know his intentions, is still stringing you along. I can’t see how that is submissive….especially since in this video, the premise is that submission is reserved for your actual husband, not a boyfriend or unofficial partner, S.O., etc.

@cupofserenity7692

Жыл бұрын

@@Summerkillens well now it’s you holding the cards deciding if you still want to sit at the table and play. No one is forcing you. The other person has their own cards and so do you. Now if each other is taking turns to see what’s being pulled next, if you feel it’s going to long, then you can call for gameover, that’s the point of vetting men. They are testing you, and you are testing them, and if the woman is worn out, then that means something is wrong. Time to pull back and not gamble more of your time and energy

@cupofserenity7692

Жыл бұрын

@@Summerkillens some men don’t like telling their intentions at first for a couple of reasons. But if he’s doing that constantly and their’s not one intention being said, then he’s truly not into you and is using you. You’re right about that

How is she giving”love” when she has been searching for it? It’s like you don’t have something but you are giving people. It’s not possible. Preach sis!

id rather be hard to love than easy to leave - Jessie Reyez

Breeny I completely agreee with what you saidddd. The only thing I would’ve added was the fact that you always have to constantly pour into your self and give yourself the love that you’re thinking you need to give to others. You constantly said that the way she’s loving that man is how she wants to be loved. She needed to just pour that into herself

@StarringShameka

2 жыл бұрын

‼️

Yes, being direct is the way forward. Do not be afraid of losing someone. Say exactly what is o. Your mind. He will respect you more for it.

Value does not beg! Breeny is HITTING! I am a diamond, people should see me for what I am worth… I don’t have to prove my worth!

She does need to watch this... Even the way her boyfriend talks about her you can tell he's know she doesn't know her value and he uses it to his advantage

@Myaccount923

2 жыл бұрын

Jazzy doesn’t have any kids

I always tell men I am high maintenance, but I take care of myself. Whew. I spent a lot of time blaming myself when something didn’t work out. I thought, maybe I say “no” too much. I went to therapy. Turns out, I have standards lol! I’ll be okay, God will take care of me whatever happens. Thank you for this comforting content.

I went to this jazzy girl’s comment section and the things I saw these men saying about this topic was nothing short of disgusting. They literally were saying things like “it doesn’t matter if it’s reciprocated”. I also saw a lot of black men bashing black women as a whole and saying really disrespectful things. Black women really need to start dating outside their race. I know it’s not the end all be all answer, but I feel like it’s time black women as a whole start looking elsewhere for a husband who loves and respects them.

@Zen-cx5tc

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed

"I'm not healing anyone, this is not rehab" 👏

Man it's so true what you said about sexual abuse and desire to be abused during sex because that's the taste you developed from the abuse forming that in you..mind blown🤯🤯🤯

Yes everything you said! I found myself giving and giving and I got nothing in return .. I was young and didn’t have the knowledge or words to express that lacking feeling.. after a while I realized what I was doing wasn’t working for me.

She's going to get so drained, loose herself and if it doesn't work out , not just her heart but her spirit will be broken.

@Zen-cx5tc

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed, it happened to me. Going back into therapy. I need to be healed and the best version of myself.

I like Shan's podcast and found this episode so interesting! I couldn't wait tomorrow morning to watch your video! I have codependency traits, I'm working on it and need to keep reminding myself that I don't have to prove that I am deserving of Love! KNOWING my worth is a long journey but it is worth it. I'm learning and healing. Thank you for all you do, share and teach Breeny!

The hilarious part to me is that speaking from experience and observation, men are not even going to appreciate all this nonsense she's doing. Like Breeny said; you must NOT be afraid to "lose" a man. She should not be surprised if he ends things soon cuz I'm sure he is hella pissed at the exposure this has all gotten. Anyways all I will do is wish her the best and hope she evolves out of this stage someday soon

Men dont like a doormat. So being a doormat to our mans back and call will eventually backfire. He dated a woman, now you're a doormat. That's not what he chose

I couldn’t stop laughing when you start singing things are going to get easier lmao

This is one of those video's that need to be replayed every now and then for maintenance, brilliant, timely and relevant message. I absolutely adore you Breeny and thank you for putting this message together and sharing it.

That definition of submission is as SPOT ON! How do you listen to your husband? How do you support his vision for the family? How do you respond when he makes a decision you don’t like? THATS where the conflict comes in for a lot of women because that’s foreign to them.

This is not submission but idolatry, with a root of control, watered by fears.

I really loved the part where you talk about being whole as a woman, and the example with the glass of water; that resonated with me so much. My question, Breeny is how do we as women get to a point of wholeness so that we do overflow in our relationships?

@lerato222

2 жыл бұрын

I know this question might be directed to Breeny but I truly believe we become whole by doing the inner work. We are limitless beings so the internal work never stops. I think it starts with spending more time alone(time spent in isolation will allow you to hear God/your higher self/guides’ voices clearer… you’re really not on this journey on your own 🥰) , taking the time to learn/figure our what you need, taking the time to figure out what you need to unlearn, unfollowing pages that are doing nothing for you (which will help you cut down on consuming content that will keep you stagnant), evaluating the energies and relationships you have/being exposed to, to determine whether or not they’re good for you (you become whatever you surround yourself with so this is a very important one), eating cleaner and detoxifying your body will also help immensely (what we eat can either feed or deplete our minds, spirits and bodies), allowing yourself to feel those growing pains instead of running away from them because life will keep teaching you the same lessons until you learn them. Be patient with yourself. Healing and growing is not a linear process. Don’t follow anyone else’s time line. Water yourself in the way you need and want to be watered. Speak life into yourself especially when it’s difficult to do so in the beginning. Prioritise your mental, physical and spiritual health. Making sure you find happiness and love that comes from within so your actions are from a place of fullness. Doing what is difficult (feeling instead of escaping, working on yourself, the growing pains on your journey to tapping into your limitlessness etc…) usually first usually saves us from suffering long term. Take it one step at a time. Ask for help when you need it. All the best on your journey 🫂🤍.

@bedine.j

2 жыл бұрын

By speaking your truth. Say no when you feel the need to say no and not feel bad about saying no to people. Not being a yes person . Making it to easy for people for the sake of not making arguments . Just to name a few things .

I believe that what she does is not so much about being loved, but about making herself needed and indispensable. This is also an attempt to control the man.

I would also like to say that I really appreciate that girl’s honesty! I’m sure it took a lot for her to even be able to do that and giving us all an opportunity to learn from her. I was once that girl :) and I have a lot of empathy and compassion without judgment.

I absolutely love your energy Breeny! The way you broke down each lesson in such a meaningful, nonjudgmental, open way really helped. I believe we all can relate to these lessons at some point in our lives, living in a society were value is misunderstood. I personally haven’t focused much on relationships in general, but have been learning these lessons along the way. It’s like value is energetic not superficial.

You have always been someone I admire so much, you helped me get through a ten year relationship, and your so right my child hood trauma is definitely drags to our adult lives. Your so right with your view on this podcast.🙏👌💯😮‍💨

The breakdown was REAL!!! You did that. I hope the women who are hearing this and see themselves can now help themselves into a healthy, self aware mental status. They have to learn to love themselves COMPLETELY as they are, but still be open to improvement if necessary.

This is the therapy sessions I didn't know I needed. Thank you for all that you are doing and continue to do. Your channel has been a breath of fresh air and so timely for me.

If you’re not talking marriage I’m not talking submission 😂😂😂 period

@nikigracevlogs

2 жыл бұрын

Right! 👏🏾

Breeny, this video is more valuable than gold. Thank you so much for making this video. If I had made this video I couldn’t have put it in better words than you have. It really touched me more than anything and I feel for so many young women who don’t have this knowledge and feel lost thinking that their abnormality is normalcy. Don’t stop doing this! I love you!

As always this was great 😌👏🏽 I love that you take the time to break things down in an easy digestible way for us to receive it without feeling judged. We’ve all experienced things in relationships that have created valuable self-love learning curves that ultimately help us, help each other grow. I love that for us💕🙌🏾 Thank you Breeny💕🙏🏽

You snapped with this one sis!! I’m 24 and I’ve been watching your videos for going on a little over a year now! I found you after being in a string of toxic relationships and among the most painful was toxic friendships and mentorships with women!! You are like a virtual big sister! Don’t ever stop, Breeny!! I’m still learning because as you’ve said, self love is a journey, but people are sometimes (and sometimes I myself am surprised) at how when I see red flags 🚩 I will totally dip and not look back!! I’m 💯 % unafraid to lose a man and I do think you’ve been apart of influencing that mindset!!!

You singing at the end made me tear up 🥹 I am the big sis and never had one, you have helped me rethink a lot of things about my mindset and self worth. I loved your breakdown, so respectful and thoughtful. 💖

couldn’t be me! especially this year! but i definitely watched for the advice and my big sis’ insight! in every relationship, not ONLY romantic. you’ve hit every nail on the head…as always. love you my good sis! thank you for allowing God to use you as a vessel in so many healthy ways to spread messages 💓💓💓 much love from an east african girrrlll in Vancouver, Canada! ✨ never stop being exactly who God called you to be.

LISTEN!!!! I started following you years back and the growth and wisdom you have shown over the years is incredible!!!! You should be so proud of yourself!!!!! The knowledge you is sharing is from a REAL,HEALING AND HEALTHY PLACE!!!!! Thank you and keep those videos coming sis 💚 incredible!!!!! Such valid and insightful information!!!!!

God is Love. I’m here in tears sis. U are Speaking the TRUTH ✨🕊 TY for this!!! Just subscribed + followed on IG. Stay shining Queen.

Come through Breeny!!! I agree with everything you said 1000 percent!!! YOU ARE ALREADY WORTHY! 💛

Timing is impeccable 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

I just loved this. So insightful. I will be listening again tomorrow. Trying to learn this, I believe, has saved me from facing more heart ache. I can’t wait until my cup overflows. But I’m no longer pouring from a cup that isn’t full.

Their getting SERVITUDE & submission confused

I am obsessed with your videos. You always express your points so eloquently, with a direct route, and come with the facts.