Thought this was about him being insecure about her making more. After hearing the story, her impulse spending and bad money management is the problem. Him being away in the military doesn’t help. She needs adult supervision.

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

@Kevin_Roche

3 жыл бұрын

Good point.

@user-bc4uz9tp8k

3 жыл бұрын

@Johnny Five he could get over on her more than that if they divorce...she could end up like Halle Berry

@mbank3832

3 жыл бұрын

Yea she is basically blaming men for her problem

@andrewblocher9110

3 жыл бұрын

He is most likely better equipped to be disciplined with money, even if he isn’t he has massive amounts of resources within the military to help with money. It’s not about him joining her team or vice versa. It’s about starting a NEW TEAM together.

My wife makes more money than me and im not jealous. We're a team, and on the same page so it doesn't matter. When she does well, we do well, and vice-versa.

"That's not manning up" I wonder how many men have been guilt triped using these words.

@Sizukun1

3 жыл бұрын

Only the stupid ones. "just man up and do xyz..." thats usually when the person wanting them to do something doesn't have a logical argument.

@mike112693

3 жыл бұрын

I got guilt-tripped when i was younger but then I really thought about it...it's really annoying when girls use that phrase and most of them have no idea what it means to actually be a man.

@rationalsamrat3247

3 жыл бұрын

@@mike112693 true ,they usually say this to force men to do their biding, but a true man would never be a doorMatt he will never be submissive to anyone .

@rationalsamrat3247

3 жыл бұрын

@Nuclear Muscle well atleat men know what MAN UP means .

@mph5896

3 жыл бұрын

There really is no such thing as manning up anymore if everybody is suppose to be an equal.

Thought this was about him being insecure. But no...

@edkennedy7952

3 жыл бұрын

Its about her being stupid.

@susieblanco2722

3 жыл бұрын

Same

Since her salary just doubled......she should be focused on paying off her student debt........not focused on her income being twice his.

@genxx2724

3 жыл бұрын

Yep. She’s still in the hole, burdening him, actually.

@Ethiodawg

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah, a good wife should focus on that.

@charlesg7926

3 жыл бұрын

@@Ethiodawg Yes they should. A SMART, ANYONE should focus on that. What are you implying?

He doesn't have a problem with her making more money. SHE has a problem with making more money than him.

@mylife2530

3 жыл бұрын

Haven’t watched the video. BUT Facts you must be red pill af my man 🤙🏽

@FlutterSwag

3 жыл бұрын

Yep strong independwnt women seem very unhappy

@richd5476

3 жыл бұрын

Spot on.

@mph5896

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds like she spends to much $ and wants his income to shovel out of the mess she made. Making $100k a year is nothing if your boat has a giant hole in it taking on more water.

@usernameluis305

3 жыл бұрын

@@FlutterSwag independent women dont want to actually be independent

We need more information. She hesitated when telling her side of the story but not his. I sure she is hiding a lot from Dave.

It's easy to be "accountable" now that you have enough money to cover your habits. She needs to realize that, from his perspective, that's not accountability. That's fortunate circumstances compensating for a lack of situational awareness. Heather, you are living in different spheres of existence. Time is not progressing at the same rate for you and your husband. Before you talk about "getting him on board" now that you're in such a good position, you need to learn to communicate on his frequency. While he's down range, you've been pursuing your goals, making decisions for you, doing what feels right to you, and not really caring about the repercussions because he's not there a lot. But you've been doing that without enough consideration of the stress and burden he carries just trying to meet you half way in life. Now you've made this huge jump. And if your tone on the phone is any indication of your tone with your husband, there is a, perhaps unintentional, condescending nature that accompanies your newfound success. If you can't address recognize and resolve that within yourself, you're marriage is going to turn toxic. Even if you can't get into couples therapy right away, I recommend going therapy and conveying to your husband that while you would love to go to counseling together, you're at least going to seek counseling to address your own issues in order to be a better wife and partner to him.

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

@terriesmith2616

3 жыл бұрын

@yamamancha Wow!! You worded perfectly!! I agree with everything you said. I couldn't have worded better.

@t-shindalankston3621

3 жыл бұрын

Yes, yes, and yes!!!!

@triciacoke43

3 жыл бұрын

Well said

I would love to hear the husband's side of the story. She was very quick to prop herself up and place blame on her husband, and Dave was very quick to judge.

@t-shindalankston3621

3 жыл бұрын

Half way into the story she want to say she has debt and money issues.

@marko3760

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah i think it is unfair on him.

She is a major red flag, probably lying about her “husband” being SF

@censormedaddy

3 жыл бұрын

@USAFPenguine Nothing wrong with being a cook in the military...

@TheMystery51

3 жыл бұрын

"Special Forces" is a generic term also. Everyone in the military has an MOS and I find it hard to believe she does not know it.

@christianc7420

3 жыл бұрын

@@TheMystery51 No, special operations is generic. Special forces are green berets

@sparks6177

3 жыл бұрын

She may have been worried about sharing his status in the military, it’s not like it’s a huge secret but she may not understand that

@candaceoseibonsu7739

3 жыл бұрын

I was thinking the same thing

Dave likes to judge the other guy without knowing his reasoning behind keeping stuff separate.

@vrimtube

3 жыл бұрын

I know right. If his income is so little and hers is so Amazing how abt she pay off the debt she got herself into instead of scape goating her husband

@johnallen3497

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly! For all we know this lady could have in the past had a massive spending or gambling problem

@Geeksquad59

3 жыл бұрын

Yea I noticed he's judgemental asf

@DavidRamseyIII

3 жыл бұрын

He’s always judgemental of losers like this “couple” who have seperate finances. I’m taken back by it to. How can you possibly have a marriage without combining something so fundamental to everything

@usernameluis305

3 жыл бұрын

@@Geeksquad59 hes only judgemental against husbands when the wife is on the phone

She needs to use her new income to paying off her own student loan.

@vrimtube

3 жыл бұрын

I don't see why Dave doesn't suggest that. It's clear he doesn't want her debt. If her income is so spectacular and his is so little, she could pay her own debt off. Doesn't seem like he's doing bad for someone half their income of their spouse. Interesting how she's the one throwing a fuss.

@badrhari2390

3 жыл бұрын

@@vrimtube I think Dave is kinda old school when it comes to men and women relationship, socially marriage. But we dealing with new savages, and yes, she has a big debt and a serious problem spending money. I don't even need to hear the other side of the story, it seems quite obvious.

@Tunechi65

3 жыл бұрын

@@badrhari2390 agreed. Dave still has the ancient way of thinking This is why I'm excited that his show is going to younger folks. He can't keep up.

@diahill1945

3 жыл бұрын

@@badrhari2390 I’m older than Dave and I’m sure he’s stuck in a patriarchy mindset . This is why he pushes people into marriages and counselling by the church .

@TheMan-ud2wq

3 жыл бұрын

@@diahill1945 What he recommends is backed by data but you cant see the forest for the trees.

All the people commenting about the husbands insecurity didn’t listen to the video. They titled this wrong to probably pander to a female audience.

@edkennedy7952

3 жыл бұрын

Their good at it.

@davem4193

3 жыл бұрын

Simps gonna simp.

@djpuplex

3 жыл бұрын

The always do pitch the 🐝. Women make up the majority of purchasing decision in a marriage.

@seannelson5044

3 жыл бұрын

After listening to this video, they really titled this for click bait. This financial problem had nothing to do with her pay increase but her lack of self-responsibility

Before they combine their money, she needs to demonstrate that she’s financially responsible by paying off her debt and saving for at least a year. Then he would probably trust her. This is a trust issue.

I think this is above Dave's paygrade.

@lakeslusher6586

3 жыл бұрын

😂😂

@dyl750

3 жыл бұрын

Hahahahaha ain’t that the truth

@jaye9300

3 жыл бұрын

He gets this same call almost daily. He’s got this.

@LinkTheHeroOfTime

3 жыл бұрын

@@jaye9300 You got it. Dave knows what's up.

@macummings7818

2 жыл бұрын

I think you're clueless 🙄

She's crowing about $100K income meanwhile she's got $90K in student debt. She's driving a yacht with a hole in the hull.

So basically she wants her husband to “get on board” and help pay her debt and wonder what’s wrong with him when he say no 🤣

@edkennedy7952

3 жыл бұрын

Yup, and then he say he's not shocked......lol, i guess he's used to this f'd up mentality.

@Silidons91

3 жыл бұрын

*pay her debt

@adamsaldana5462

3 жыл бұрын

Its not her debt They are married, its both of theirs.

@mbank3832

3 жыл бұрын

@@adamsaldana5462 the debt was there before they get married, so this is her problem, not his, you simp

@Silidons91

3 жыл бұрын

@@adamsaldana5462 she racked it up on her own....it's her debt.

The military offers marriage counseling for veterans and active. This is more than a finance problem.

Maybe he doesn't trust your for a good reason? I would like to hear his side of the story before giving advice.

@wanderingnomad1

2 жыл бұрын

Glad to hear a woman’s perspective on this.

Her husband is keeping everything separate because she has bad spending habits. She makes six figures but she probably spends five.

@mph5896

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds like she spends every penny she makes, and then some.

@terriesmith2616

3 жыл бұрын

I'm a woman and I'm going to say she spends everything she makes and then some, that's why her husband is not combining money with her. Can't blame the guy. She's only been on the straight and narrow for a year, that's not long enough to break her bad money habits. She could relapse at anytime.

@SummeRain783

3 жыл бұрын

As Muslims we believe the men are financially responsible and if the woman works then she gets to keep all her money to do as she wants with it. She is not responsible for any of the financial side. I hope he does take some responsibility as a husband but limits it to just what he needs to provide for basic things like food, shelter etc. Also in Islam the woman are responsible for guarding their husbands property which includes his earnings. So I hope she also starts being aware of that and respects his hard earned income. Keeping things entirely separate on his part is just as bad in my opinion as her being wasteful when they are both married.

@X11CHASE

2 жыл бұрын

@@SummeRain783 no one cares about your nonsensical principles

With what he has to deal with in the military and then her impulse buying played a part. She paints it as if it’s his problem but he’s just detached and reacting to her.

They're on the competitive car-buying system. "SHE'S getting a new car, I'M getting a new truck!" It's so common and so stupid for those already in debt.

Most Special Ops soldiers once finished with selection and training are E7 with decent base pay, housing allowance and special pay, hazardous duty pay, HALO/parachute duty pay....so he has decent income. It is her who let her promotion gets over her head.

Imagine being the husband watching this lol

If she has 90k in student loans. Half her shovel could be going to pay off her debt. Why she is not trying to get rid of her baggage before trying to fix him?

@edkennedy7952

3 жыл бұрын

and pay off her debts.

@Shay416

3 жыл бұрын

It could be that she wants to see what his balance sheet looks like so they both can decide how to tackle their debts.

@joyaustin6581

3 жыл бұрын

@@Shay416 call me self but I would pay off my baggage first out of guilt for bringing debt into a relationship.

@Jaxsf1

3 жыл бұрын

Before her raise, she had an excuse for not paying her debts. And she could keep her big spending habits. Now she doesn’t have an excuse, so she wants to combine finances so she can use her husband’s money to pay the debts. And she could keep spending big.

As a vet having worked with SF guys I can say that he is doing that cause he has absolutely no trust in her. Trust is everything for those guys. There is more to this story she didn’t tell us.

She stopped only recently. A year ago. I think she could start by showing that she’s responsible for the next year

She 100% is the one having trouble with it. She's just projecting it on her husband. She's probably contemplating divorcing him because he's "no longer on her level".

Lets hear from him before judging

Having a hard time with it only because you keep reminding him...

@littleripper312

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly, she sounds incredibly arrogant.

Did she say $200 tooth paste? 🤔🤦🏽‍♂️

@ceecee8757

3 жыл бұрын

Does she have dentures?

@anniealexander9616

3 жыл бұрын

She goes for toothpaste and then spends $200 on other things.

@MRiGOin23

3 жыл бұрын

@@anniealexander9616 that makes more sense lol

Can we just take a moment and thank Heather and her husband for their contributions to the betterment of society. Huge kudos and thanks to each.

@airthrowDBT

3 жыл бұрын

His killing Afghan villagers improves my life by zero percent.

He doesn't want to combine checking accounts cause she had/has a spending problem. She obviously is trying to be better but he's not there yet with trusting her. They both have debt and they both need to come together and make a budget and pay it off.

That man has seen more than Dave can ever imagine and you're telling HIM to "Man up". You need to be more respectful especially only hearing one side of the story! 💡

I'm starting not to beilieve in most of Dave's titles for these videos.

Dave doesn't understand us in the military, we was taught about keeping finances separate along with prenuptial. Yes we pay the regular house bills/food/car payments together. But the savings..thats yours. So if you blow your money on stupid things before you get paid again, so be it..at least the bills are paid and you're up the creek without a paddle. Over and over again by our leadership they preached us this. Its not about religion or no trust, its a protective shield for yourself, for you won't be left out to dry if things go down hill.

If they can’t get on the same page long term there marriage will drift apart I’ve been married for 25 years and my wife has not worked in 18 of them, it’s not my money it’s Our money

@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303

3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for simpin

@haloking4699

3 жыл бұрын

@@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303 😂😂

@ZukoTheShinigami

3 жыл бұрын

I couldn't imagine simping that hard my friend. Sheesh.

@EmeralDiamonds

3 жыл бұрын

wewhoareabouttodie saluteyou he’s not a simp he’s a real man. You clearly don’t have a father to not recognize this

@davem4193

3 жыл бұрын

@@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303 right? Simp extraordinaire.

I'll never understand the insecurity that comes with your wife making more money. I can't wait for my wife to make more money for our family. If anything were to happen to me I can take pride in knowing she can support our family.

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

@SimonSaysyo

3 жыл бұрын

How about if she out earns you? Is the feeling the same? Is the marriage the same at that point?

@enricopallazzo3244

3 жыл бұрын

Seriously. I hope she makes so much I can quit!

@brandonvillamagna6223

3 жыл бұрын

@@enricopallazzo3244 for real. i hope she makes 20x me one day and i can play pokémon all day

@enricopallazzo3244

3 жыл бұрын

@@brandonvillamagna6223 hahaha Call of Duty here but I know what you mean.

It sounds like literally no part of this rested on the "fact" that her husband was jealous of her and likely was more about her husband not trusting her judgement. Now that she finally made some decent money she is just using that as a bludgeon.

It blows my mind that they have no clue about the others finances. So many people get married without crucial conversations and the marriage ends because of it.

@thedaveramseyshow1426

3 жыл бұрын

W...H...A...T...S...A...P...P +...1...4...0,,,5...4,,,0...0,,,2...2,,,2...8

I can relate. My fiancé comes from a wealthy family. She is bringing no debt, 30k in savings, and two real estate properties while I’m only bringing a job and 55k in debt. It is hard to get her on board to living on rice and beans when she doesn’t have the issues herself and doesn’t understand. We are not combining finances until we’re married but it’s still difficult now.

Hypergamy goes into full overdrive when situations like this come up unfortunately. Chances of divorce rise exponentially if she makes more and he has less. IIWII

@TheMan-ud2wq

3 жыл бұрын

Id hate to know I banged a spec opts wife...

The title of this video is misleading. Dave's religious beliefs are preventing him from stating the obvious: the husband would have to be nuts to allow her access to his money.

The way I see it, this woman can lose her job tomorrow and be forced to find a job making LESS. Nothing is permanent. Great, she makes more money than her hubby, but sometimes life gives you lemons, so no need to get cocky about it. Military personnel has a fixed income until they are promoted. Btw, "just infantry" means he signed a blank check that only costs him his LIFE. Thank you for your service, sir.

While I was on a combat Deployment my income was more than my Nurse Practitioner wife,I was so proud of that. When I returned and got out the Marines,I had a 40k annual paying job and was going to college full time. My ego was bruised but she reassured me how proud she was of my service and that I’m continuing my education/working. Every man needs that type of support

I wouldnt want to combine my income with her.

It was odd to me that she wanted to combine finances so her husband could make her accountable. I’m going to guess he doesn’t want to babysit her with her money and be the enforcer. She needs to step up and take responsibility and so she can be an adult.

While it's nice to believe in the sanctity of marriage, this lady needs to pay off her own debt with her big new raise. Women are really sweet to you when they want you to pay off THEIR student debt.

@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303

3 жыл бұрын

Kind of like a mouse behaving to be let out of a mouse trap.

Never ever the women’s fault, always the mans fault with Dave. “Not manning up, throwing wife in ditch.” Very absurd and far reaching comments Dave.

Dave: what's your husband do for a living? Caller: he's military Dave: um, OK, what does he do? Caller: he's in the army - I guess he does army stuff? Trying not to judge here but she doesn't care enough to know what her husband does which kind of makes sense how she was convinced to not know what her husband is doing financially. She probably doesn't care to know about her husband's other wife and kids too.

Dave you're telling a SF guy to man up?

If you both love each other, it really shouldn't matter if any one person make more money.

@grizzlybear2702

3 жыл бұрын

But it does matter. A woman doesn’t have a strong enough desire intimacy to justify providing for a man. The male $ex drive is thousands of times more powerful and thus men will tolerate anything to be with a woman.

@ClaxtonBay123

3 жыл бұрын

@@grizzlybear2702 Stop talking Bullsht.

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

@tallswede80

3 жыл бұрын

@@ClaxtonBay123 "Stop talking Bullsht." Isn't that what your mother said to you? Induction motor is correct. Women tend to marry men that make more money than they do for that very reason. This is a fact.

@mickmash-5192

3 жыл бұрын

@@tallswede80 You know what’s an actual fact? Here in Australia, a landmark 10 year study revealed that where women earn more in the relationship, 35% can expect to be physically assaulted by their male partner JUST for earning more. Many men have a dangerously warped perception about what a woman’s role should be. Your anecdotal nonsense doesn’t stack up to the rigours of actual, verifiable research.

Military doesn't pay by the occupation. It pays by rank. Dave showed his knowledge.

@arthrodea

3 жыл бұрын

I think Dave was trying to get an idea of the husbands personality traits - special forces vs army nurse vs supply chain probably have some different personality traits.

@twiWright25

3 жыл бұрын

That's not entirely true. Certain jobs are eligible for additional pay outside of normal bonuses, jump pay, special duty pay, hazard pay, variable special pay, incentive pay. Just to name a few.

@kalabash72

3 жыл бұрын

@@twiWright25 That's outside base pay. It's similar to getting a performance bonus at a civilian. It's addition to under certain met circumstances.

@kalabash72

3 жыл бұрын

@@arthrodea I suppose you could say that. The title implies otherwise but later on he discusses a special forces personality.

@twiWright25

3 жыл бұрын

@@kalabash72 I never said it was tied to base pay.

People act like it's the men that have a problem with women earning more, but I've never once heard a man complain about it. In my experience, the woman usually gets a big ego that causes relational problems which she then blames on mens' insecurity. "It's not that I have a problem! Men are just too intimidated by how great I am!" Trust me, men want to date intelligent and successful women. THAT is not the reason they are avoiding you 😂.

@airthrowDBT

3 жыл бұрын

I was excited for my ex-wife to start making more, until she stopped respecting me over it. I had zero ego about making more the first 10 years of our relationship and was quite generous. In my experience women are not able to respect men they make significantly more than, the corporation then becomes hubby

I make more money than my boyfriend does and he felt embarrassed for awhile about that. I told him all that matters is having a job in general, being able to support yourself with it and doing your best at it.

@ClaxtonBay123

3 жыл бұрын

Time for that BOYfriend to MAN-UP

@xxxxMonkeyGirlxxxx

3 жыл бұрын

@@ClaxtonBay123 you can do as you please with your own personal life. This is how we live ours and we are happy about it.

@msi8311

3 жыл бұрын

That’s great. Do you plan to have kids? If so, who will raise them? The man because him cutting his salary to raise kids would be less of a financial blow than the woman who is the breadwinner? Or would the woman stay home and the household income is even less than if the man stayed home? Or would strangers in daycare raise the kids? I think if both parents are career oriented, maybe including grandparents or someone in the child rearing process would give both enough time to work and feel comfortable that their children aren’t being raised by total strangers. If kids aren’t involved I could care less about relationship dynamics tbh. But once children are involved, I have questions.

@jadeedwards9276

3 жыл бұрын

@Nuclear Muscle if men stepped up in household duties it would make more sense

This is why you combine $ from the very beginning. Then you don’t have to have arguments or resentments.

You can tell she's let go of taking care of herself. When one focuses on someone else, they lose touch with their own quality of life.

Didn't take but a little digging to figure out she is the problem. Honestly as a retired member of the military myself I think best way to approach this is in terms of a mission and mission planning. Dave has a point if each month is a small mission with the goal of winning the war all the cards are on the table. That means he can see every penny she spends which sound like where his trust issues are. If having physically separated bank accounts makes him feel better that's fine but when you sit down every month to do the budget the banks statements are laid out on the table.

As soon as she started stumbling with her husband is AD in the Army I thought yeah, steel magnolia.

The way that she talks is the biggest red flag

It's not your money. It's not his money. It should be "our" money. Trust issues can be hard to get past, but I hope these two can work it out. Put everything in writing that might make things easier.

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

I would love to hear the husband side, but so far, I think she triggered his behavior.

Wife:“We need to talk... I feel like you have a problem with my income being more than yours” Husband: google divorce attorney in my area

I see another problem. Dave:What does your husband do? Caller: Hes in the military. Dave: But what does he do? Caller: He’s active duty in the Army. Me: BUT WHAT DOES HE DO? IS HE A MECHANIC, POLICE, COOK, WHAT DOES HE DO? She can’t answer that, she clearly doesn’t care. To me, it almost sounds like she wants to brag about her income, blame the husband for not being happy, and just...ugh. Lack of communication apparently on both sides.

Wow I’m the first one here! Be proud of your accomplishments. My husband makes more than me but I’m sure if the situation was reversed, he would be super happy.

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

@anniefenter8697

3 жыл бұрын

At different times in our marriage we have both made more money than the other. We always just pool our money together and that has worked for 36 yrs.

I think its natural for men to feel insecure about making less because men just want to feel they're providing for the family. The society shouldn't be so rough on men for that.

She doesn't sound supportive of his choice in profession or the lifestyle that comes with being a military wife.

probably becauss she gives him a hard time.

Hypergamy for ya. I'd love to hear his side. I'm sure she is sweet as pie and not a dictator what so ever.

3:54 - Did she say "200-dollar toothpaste" ? Gasp...

@thedaveramseyshow1426

3 жыл бұрын

W

I love when one calls for financial problems but it turns out to be marriage/relationship problems.

He should keep the finances separate until her debt is paid off

@gsabic

10 ай бұрын

absolutely

As someone else said, she’s not making better money decisions now vs a year ago. She just has more money now to cover her bad decisions. Her question is really about how to avoid paying her own debts. Before her raise, she had an excuse for not paying her debts. And she could ignore them and keep her big spending habits. Now that she makes good money she doesn’t have an excuse, so she wants to combine finances so she can use her husband’s money to pay the debts. And she could keep spending big.

This is easy, if you husband wants everything to remain separate, that’s ok, you just made more money, use your money to clear your debt. And save some for that day when your husband might need your help.. don’t rub it on his face about making more money than him. On his next birthday, surprise him by paying off one of his debts. Love is a thing of the heart, show him more love than he expects.

If the roles were reversed it would somehow still be blamed on the husband. He’d be called a twerp, a loser, a baby, a user, a wimp and numerous other names. Of course, an “are you safe?” would be coming followed by two biblical texts to show how much the man has messed up. DR gets things right most times and I enjoy his advice but this is one of those calls where I want to change the channel.

Me and my wife have separate accounts but both know exactly what each other has. It just works for us.

The past decisions are causing the stress, gotta get on the same page.

She was clueless on what he does in the military.

I would like to hear both sides of this story and then figure out the truth

So if he was just "infantry" , dave was ready to call him a goob.. Surprisingly, for dave, he turned out to be better.. lol

@censormedaddy

3 жыл бұрын

As soon as she said he was in the military Dave wasn't going to say anything negative about him.

So, he doesn't want to pay her debt because it would be enabling her shopping habits. She's gotta take responsibility for her debt or else her spending habits won't change.

she is the problem....very simple

@wahinepaddler4

3 жыл бұрын

She kept saying 'I'm willing to be accountable..' 'I'm willing to do that..' But the thing is up to this point she hasn't been..

i wish my wife made more money than me... all that means is more money going into our joint account

Man... I could hear the pain in that chuckle. They're having a hard time. It's hitting her hard.

@thedaveramseyshow1426

3 жыл бұрын

W...H...A...T...S...A...P...P +...1...4...0,,,5...4,,,0...0,,,2...2,,,2...8

I never had resentment. Our rewards for service aren't entirely pay but they're real too, like money but morally more valuable. Ten or a dozen of the guys I flew with didn't survive but Ruth didn't seem affected by the risk. Maybe she hoped I'd plant one, but I always brought the airplane home, even from the carrier. Michael, USMC retired, Naval Aviator

She controls everything that's what make him powerless as a man.

He’s rightly scared of hypergamy

Red flags 🚩 on her end. *She* has a problem that her husband doesn’t want to help pay her own debt despite the fact that she makes more money and ran up the debt herself. Always read between the lines when someone calls and immediately puts the blame on the other person who doesn’t have a chance to make their case on the show as well. Also, once again Dave is soft on women who make bad financial decisions, and harsh on men who do same, or he tells those women’s husbands to “man up!”. Smh.

I've got some different advice - husband should walk away from this marriage. And if he is genuinely special forces I would be surprised if he is making $50k a year - probably a lot more.

@Trading-oy1dk

3 жыл бұрын

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I love listening to these kind of stuff bc I've learned a lot from it. However, a lot of times callers called in and only tell Dave one side of their story. I'm in a similar situation and I handled my money well, I've been listening to Dave for quite sometimes. Here my wife does the same thing like her, they made some stupid financial decisions and never listen. On top of that, there's a 90k student loans. Now you finally start listening to Dave and you asking Dave how can I get my husband on the same boat? Helping you paying off your stupid debts and you go out make some more stupid decisions bc you just double ur salary? It takes time lady.

She should call Kevin samuels 🤣

@thedaveramseyshow1426

3 жыл бұрын

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"hes special forces" 😂 😂 😂

My sister had the same problem. Their marriage suffered. When she changed careers to lower pay, her marriage suddenly improved. He could not handle that she was primary bread winner.

Everyone take note, you don’t have to be very bright to command a descent income.

She will get her debt paided off and dump him the next day. He should run

Mr Dave needs to stop telling this guy to man up. He doesn't know the full story. He just immediately made an uninformed judgement call. Fully disappointed in his advice, but kudos on the gift.

There's an old Candid Camera clip that dealt with this. The husband was going to divorce wife cuz she made too much money. The lawyer who got pranked with dealing with the papers cried, "If my wife made more than me, I would stay with her forevvverrrr."

This is what happens with a lot of people who make a lot of money. You make a lot, you spend a lot. When i get a salary increase I immediately go to my brokerage account and increase my automation strategy. It's the best thing for most people. Don't upgrade your lifestyle!!

Who cares if their spouse makes more? 😂

@johnkate9549

3 жыл бұрын

W:,h:,a:,t:,s:,a:,p:,p%%%+++ {+,,,,,,1,,,,,,4,,,,,, 7,,,,,,,0,,,,5,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,2 ,,,,,,,,9,,,,,,,,,0,,,,,,,7,,,,,,,,,1} Thanks for watching...+++++•

@Rooot-username

3 жыл бұрын

Women because they naturally want to be protected financially and physically. When it comes to provision Women want to be provided for. Sooner or later her hypergamy would kick in

@mickmash-5192

3 жыл бұрын

Men who’s precious ego utterly depends on being the dominant top dog in the relationship, they’re the ones who care. They become unstable when this role is challenged in any way. Unfortunately, there’s far too many such men.

@Rooot-username

3 жыл бұрын

@@mickmash-5192 you sound silly.

@msi8311

3 жыл бұрын

I prefer to be with a man who earns more because I want to have a family and raise my own kids. I don’t want strangers in daycare raising them, I had terrible experiences of my own and wish my mom gave up her receptionist job to actually raise me (honestly she shouldn’t have had kids). I want a man who can provide for a family to give us the best chance possible of stable children. If children aren’t involved the relationship between two adults doesn’t impact society as much. If kids are involved, that impacts society because if those kids aren’t raised right, well that’s why things are the way they are today.

I bet the husband doesn't care