How to Stop People Pleasing and Worrying About What Others Think Of You | Wu Wei Wisdom

Learn practical steps to break free from people pleasing and worrying about others' opinions.
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☯️ WU WEI WISDOM LIFE LESSONS EPISODE # 267
00:00 Introduction - defining the problem of seeking validation and people-pleasing
02:29 Why your Inner Child is hooked on the drug of wanting approval from other people
07:00 The link between anxiety, worry and self-doubt, and how to use the Golden Thread Process to find the root of the problem
10:26 Why approval-seeking behaviour stems from childhood experiences and our Inner Child
14:12 The role of your Shen and authentic self in valuing yourself
18:19 How to become aware of your need for approval and take self-responsibility
24:43 Top 3 practical steps for solving your approval-seeking and people-pleasing behaviour
31:19 Helpful extra resources to stop worrying about what others think of you.
Do you constantly worry about what others think of you and how they may judge your value or worth? If so, you're not alone. Worrying about what others think of you can affect various aspects of your life, including your career, relationships, and personal well-being. In this episode, we explain how to overcome self-doubt, people pleasing and constantly seeking external validation, and start trusting and valuing yourself more.
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✅ ABOUT US
Meet Wu Wei Wisdom co-founders David James Lees (emotional and spiritual health teacher and Taoist monk) and Alexandra Lees (mindset and business coach).
David and Alex's work uniquely applies ancient Eastern wisdom and emotional health practices to modern-day life, creating a powerful new paradigm for successful, authentic, abundant living.
Each week, David and Alex discuss your life challenges and offer inspirational and actionable advice to help you find balance, harmony and flow (‘wu wei’) in all aspects of your life.
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Disclaimer: This video and any associated advice and comments shared are not a substitute for professional therapy, mental health care, crisis support, medical advice, doctor diagnosis, or professional healthcare treatment. Our videos, podcasts and other website articles and social media posts provide general information for educational purposes only - they are offered as suggestions for you and your professional therapist or healthcare advisor to consider and research.
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#healthandwellness #mentalhealth #innerchild #innerchildtherapy #reparenting #innerchildwork #guidedmeditation #emotionalwellness

Пікірлер: 37

  • @WuWeiWisdom
    @WuWeiWisdomАй бұрын

    VIDEOS TO WATCH NEXT! 👉👉 ▶ Stop Comparing, Criticising and Judging Yourself kzread.info/dash/bejne/fqmTmLSqYKbXncY.htmlsi=uzPhFoibI7Ac9hVO ▶ Why Your Needy Inner Child Seeks Approval kzread.info/dash/bejne/p3V3yauDd9WygMo.htmlsi=_6t-byIyCmsZ7yBo ▶ Self-Love and Self-Acceptance Guided Meditation kzread.info/dash/bejne/pX6os9dvpsS5eLA.htmlsi=TlXAabvl7bydvX4g ▶ Believe in Yourself Guided Meditation kzread.info/dash/bejne/f6ts0dqjcaysqag.htmlsi=gKHE1U51RbiauNaT ▶ THE INNER CHILD PLAYLIST kzread.info/head/PL9NQ_PWX4zICGLRS1b7q1HSJhZRash5qq ❓ Did you enjoy this video? Post your comments and questions below - we'd LOVE to hear from you! 🌱 Want to work one-to-one with David? ➜ www.wuweiwisdom.com/therapies-for-body-mind/ 🌱 Join our private Facebook Community Support Group ➜ facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/ 🌱 Sign up to receive a RELAXING GUIDED MEDITATION GIFT, plus our weekly newsletter + offers via email ➜ www.wuweiwisdom.com/signup/

  • @TimCCambridge
    @TimCCambridgeАй бұрын

    Hi. Thanks for this. I'm reminded of the " Daoist farmer " who lost a horse, " Misfortune " the others said, he replied "Maybe". Later, the horse returned with 7 wild horses, " Fortune " the others said, he replied " Maybe ". His son, attempting to train one of the horses, fell and broke his leg, " Misfortune " the others said, he replied "Maybe". The next day conscription officers came to enlist new soldiers and rejected his wounded son, " Fortune " the others said, and he replied "Maybe".

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Tim, Thank you for sharing this wonderful story. The tale of the Daoist farmer beautifully illustrates the wisdom of accepting life's events without immediate judgment. It reminds us to remain open to the unfolding of circumstances, trusting that what may initially seem like misfortune or fortune can change over time. Kind Regards, David

  • @TillyTme
    @TillyTmeАй бұрын

    I have had years and years of therapy with very little to show for it. These videos really clarify issues for me and teach me how to use the knowledge to practically change my thinking. I am eternally grateful. Thank you both.

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Tilly, Thank you for sharing your experience. It's wonderful to hear that the videos are providing clarity and practical tools for change. We're grateful for your support and are here to continue helping you on your journey. Kind Regards, David P.S. Feel free to join our community: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/

  • @Liz_Gow
    @Liz_GowАй бұрын

    Thank you for continued compelling teachings. I hear something different every time and the more I am understanding and working in the 'niche', emotional eating the more I realise that there is so much to offer. Grateful. :)

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Liz, Thank you for your kind words. I'm delighted that you find the teachings compelling and that they resonate with you on different levels each time. It's wonderful to hear that you're making progress in understanding and addressing emotional eating. Kind Regards, David

  • @Liz_Gow

    @Liz_Gow

    Ай бұрын

    @@WuWeiWisdom thank you. Grateful. :)

  • @ryanhowley6977
    @ryanhowley6977Ай бұрын

    Love it! Go sit on the loo! You both are phenomenal! Truthfully funny and supportive for all!❤❤

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Ryan, Thank you for your enthusiastic comment! We're thrilled to hear that you find our content both funny and supportive. Your positive energy is greatly appreciated. ❤❤ If you'd like to connect further with our community, feel free to join us here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @cybermom41
    @cybermom41Ай бұрын

    This was so warm and wonderful! Thank you!🌹 Your mini-summary is looping in my mind and that makes me smile!😊

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Cybermom, Thank you for your heartfelt message! 🌹 I'm so glad to hear that the mini-summary resonated with you and brought a smile to your face. Your kind words and support mean a lot. If you haven't already, feel free to join our community to connect with others who share in the warmth and wisdom: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @joeprimal2044
    @joeprimal2044Ай бұрын

    Bless the algorithm. Thanks guys.

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Joe, Thank you for your kind comment! We're glad the content is reaching and resonating with you. Your support means a lot to us. If you'd like to connect with others who share your interest, consider joining our community: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @carolinewallis-newport1068
    @carolinewallis-newport1068Ай бұрын

    Thank you. Such great advice and such a help to self-doubters like myself. ♥

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Caroline, Thank you for your lovely comment and for being a subscriber! I'm glad to hear that the advice has been helpful to you. Remember, self-doubt is something we can all work through by nurturing our Shen spirit and practicing self-compassion. If you'd like to connect with others on a similar path, feel free to join our community: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @sidgoyari6931
    @sidgoyari69316 күн бұрын

    Thank you so much, guys!

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    5 күн бұрын

    Hi @sidgoyari6931, You're very welcome! We're glad to be part of your journey. Keep embracing the wisdom and stay connected with your Shen spirit. Kind Regards, David P.S. We'd love to have you join our community: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/

  • @andrewjones4605
    @andrewjones4605Ай бұрын

    It seems to me that it all boils down to wanting to avoid being rejected. If we can develop the mindset that it’s okay to be rejected… I think that might be the solution.

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Andrew, You've touched on an important insight. Acceptance of the possibility of non-rejection can indeed liberate us from fear and allow us to live more authentically. Embracing choice as a natural part of life helps us strengthen our Shen spirit and build resilience. By developing this mindset, we can navigate relationships and challenges with greater ease and confidence. If you'd like to explore this further with a supportive community, consider joining us: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @danielbianconi4367
    @danielbianconi4367Ай бұрын

    I so appreciate you both, thank you ❤

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Dan, Thank you for your kind words and appreciation. We are grateful for your support and are glad that our content still resonates with you :-). Kind Regards, David

  • @BecomingaQueen
    @BecomingaQueenАй бұрын

    Raising high because of your teachings 🤗 towards my shen 👑👸🏼

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi @BecomingaQueen, It's wonderful to hear that you're finding elevation in your Shen spirit through our teachings! Keep embracing the wisdom and continue to shine brightly. Kind Regards, David P.S. We'd love for you to join our community: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/

  • @alleyway2
    @alleyway223 күн бұрын

    Thank you for all that you do! ❤️

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    23 күн бұрын

    Hi @alleyway2, Thank you for your kind words and support! ❤️ We are grateful to have you as part of our community. If you haven’t already, consider joining our free Wu Wei Wisdom community for more insights and discussions: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @tobsternater
    @tobsternaterАй бұрын

    I could take the reverse of this story and talk how I actually did the things....question my value based on my imahmgining of others upon me....and really paid an enormous price in every part of my life. It was a very destructive time...

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Tobsternater, Thank you for sharing your experience. It's important to acknowledge the impact of those challenging times. Questioning our value based on others' perceptions can indeed lead to destructive outcomes. Recognizing this is the first step towards resolving these issues. Focus on nurturing your Shen spirit and aligning your actions with your true values. By doing so, you can rebuild and create a more positive path forward. Consider joining our supportive community for more guidance: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/ Kind Regards, David

  • @ronschwarz186
    @ronschwarz186Ай бұрын

    Could you please do a session on best Leadership. Leading people can include sanctions but better motivation. In both cases you have to think about the emotions of others. In a society it s not all about feeling personally well with positive emotions only. Please give some advice.

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi @ronschwarz186, Thank you for your suggestion! Leading effectively involves understanding and addressing the emotions of others while maintaining clear goals and expectations. Motivation is more powerful than sanctions; inspiring others through vision, empathy, and support creates a positive environment. Effective leaders also practice active listening, show appreciation, and foster a sense of purpose. Balancing personal well-being with the collective good is crucial. Stay tuned for a session on this topic soon! In the meantime, consider joining our community for further discussions: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David

  • @mebehappy4217
    @mebehappy4217Ай бұрын

    This teaching really resonated with me, thank you both for the wonderful work you do. I wonder if this teaching applies to cases like mine where my inner dialog/child isn't just worrying about what people are thinking about me, it's literally telling me people are rejecting me and that I am inferior, weird, pathetic ... I've always called it low self-esteem. Would the golden thread process apply in my case and are there any meditations or videos that you would recommend? Thank you❤

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi @mebehappy4217, Thank you for sharing your thoughts. The Golden Thread process can certainly help you explore and resolve these deeply held beliefs about rejection and self-worth. It’s about understanding where these beliefs come from and gently questioning their validity. For your inner dialogue, I recommend our guided meditations focused on self-compassion and affirmations. You might find these particularly beneficial in calming your mind and nurturing your Shen spirit. Feel free to explore more of our videos and join our community for additional support: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/ Kind Regards, David

  • @mebehappy4217

    @mebehappy4217

    Ай бұрын

    @@WuWeiWisdom thank you David

  • @kimberlysoutherland3031
    @kimberlysoutherland3031Ай бұрын

    What is your thoughts on enjoying praise? Two weeks ago my boss responded to an email I sent her with something she needed in it with "Thanks you're awesome". My old reaction would have been instant shame that I didn't deserve any praise and following up with worrying I had set the bar too high and she will always expect this in the future. Instead, I felt good, happy, but I was careful not to let the praise "make my day" as I thought it was appropriate to enjoy it in the moment and then move on. I did have one random thought about setting that bar too high, but told myself to stop it because that was a silly line of thought. I didn't really think much about this until today when watching this video. Is it okay to enjoy praise for a short length of time and move on with your day? Where do you draw the line between enjoying approval and enjoying a job well done (as told by another)?

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi @kimberlysoutherland3031, Thank you for sharing your experience and thoughts. It's natural to appreciate praise and feel good about it. Acknowledging your accomplishments and accepting compliments with grace is a healthy practice. It's important, as you mentioned, not to let external validation define your self-worth. Instead, let it be a momentary acknowledgment of your efforts, and then return to your inner sense of balance. Recognize the difference between external approval and your intrinsic value, which comes from within and remains steady regardless of outside opinions. For more support and guidance, consider joining our free community: [facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/] Kind Regards, David

  • @parsaaminifard7736
    @parsaaminifard7736Ай бұрын

    🙏

  • @WuWeiWisdom

    @WuWeiWisdom

    Ай бұрын

    Hi Parsa, Thank you for your kind message. 🙏 Your support is greatly appreciated. If you wish to delve deeper into the teachings and connect with like-minded individuals, consider joining our community: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind Regards, David