Did you enjoy this video ❓ Post your comments, questions & suggestions for future videos below - we’d LOVE to hear from you! ☯️ Want to work one-to-one with David? 👉 www.wuweiwisdom.com/therapies-for-body-mind/ ✅ OTHER VIDEOS YOU MAY ENJOY • Inner Child Healing for Love Addiction, Codependency & Codependent Relationships ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/fGWjzrWTYdrfqpM.html • The Self-Love Secret: How to Begin Loving Yourself ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/X32GsphroMStiqg.html • Find Real Love: Inner Child, Mindset and Relationship Advice ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/d5NmpK6KotDIXaw.html • How to Follow Your Intuition (Inner Voice) NOT Your Inner Child Fears ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/Zmx_pJZvd8KsZrw.html • The Inner Child Explained - How to Love, Guide & Heal Your Inner Child ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/dIFkzs-fcs-rYqg.html • Reparenting the Inner Child - PART 1 ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/haKYudabnLnMYrg.html PART 2 ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/dI2J2qOKidPZe8o.html • The Highly Sensitive Person Explained: How to Survive and Thrive as an HSP ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/qn2W0rqtn6ecpJM.html • Overprotective Parents - The Emotional Impact ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/lo6LzLqSqKvJm5c.html • You Are the Creator of Your Emotions NOT a Victim of Them ➜ kzread.info/dash/bejne/iZ5-ydWMY5mpqKQ.html

@jerrycdc8421

5 жыл бұрын

Truly enjoy again. You guys are my revelation of 2019. This video is so on point right now. Thanks again. Bless you.

"People go and look for people to save because they believe if they save that person then that person will love them." That is profound!!

@WuWeiWisdom

3 жыл бұрын

Hi Kelly Hutcheson, thanks for watching! We appreciate your support. You may find our Love and Relationships Video Playlist helpful: kzread.info/head/PL9NQ_PWX4zID3yxrdCbbZFuKHCwgV6qhX Alex + David x

@irminamyszkowska2899

2 жыл бұрын

@@WuWeiWisdom Ub bbj

@fingerprint5511

Жыл бұрын

This is exactly what I did for decades as I believed what you give, you receive back so seemed logical and a way to connect. All that happened was I got used and my health suffered and I was lonelier than ever.

@Lichfeldian--Suttonian

Жыл бұрын

Absolutely. The damsel in distress.

I had never looked at it this way. I think it stems from my perceived need to be liked. But you are so right- it is not my job to make other people happy. I can’t worry about being liked. I have to be nice and loving but know when to say no. It is a manipulation. Thank you for the insight.💖🙏🏻

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Hi Martha, We're delighted that the video helped you reconsider 'pleasing people' ... let us know how you get on with 'saying no' :) 💜 Alex + David x

Wish i watched this years ago! People pleasing manipulators was my ticket to anxiety, now i know it was the vehicle for their abuse. Very helpful video, no doubt it will save people from getting sick and help them heal, just like all your other wonderful videos, thank you!

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Glad you enjoyed the video Jason! With appreciation for your support 🙏 Alex + David x

@eligreen7925

Жыл бұрын

@@WuWeiWisdom no

I've just turned 60 and how true is the saying " you're never too old to learn!" I feel as if I've just started school and I'm only just beginning to learn 😮 Thank you so much ❤

@WuWeiWisdom

10 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing!! Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest and support. Why don't you consider joining our FREE and private Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - Over 7,500 members discuss WWW teachings, answer questions and share experiences: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind regards, David.

This is Me. I am ALWAYS the one that gives more in any type of relationship, and after 36 years, I have come to realize that I am drained oh helping and helping others, without most of the time receiving the same from them. I like people pleasing because I felt it was the "unselfish" thing to do, but learning more and more that it is not.

David u have changed my life forever.. I am so grateful to you.. I struggled for many many years trying to seek value not understanding that the one person i had ignored-myself was the only one who could give me value...I am a really different person..I thank God to having known your teachings..Beautiful Alex- i believe that your questions are able to draw out the best of the best from David..what a lovely team! can i please give just some feedback to please let David finish what he is saying.. sometimes i am dying to hear him complete explaining on the subtopic and u direct him to another question in the middle of his talking... also is it possible for you to do a video on narcissistic personality disorder or how to deal with narcissistic abuse please

This session is beautiful!! Thank-you so much. I was in a situation just yesterday where I was not honest. I said it was 'okay' to accept a High top dining table when I knew it would be hurting my back. As much as I tried to be engaged , I was more and more resentful. This made the 'dining' very awkward. It never occurred to me that if I had spoken up, with kindness and honesty, we could have had a totally different dinner experience. I don't know why I am so fearful and critical of myself that I end up in angst. Thank you for this beautiful message of truth and honesty with kindness 💜 It

@WuWeiWisdom

2 ай бұрын

Hi @cybermom41, Thank you for your heartfelt message and for sharing your experience with us. It's a significant step to recognise moments where speaking your truth can transform your experiences. Remember, it's okay to express your needs and preferences with kindness and honesty. It's a journey to learn to think less critically of oneself and to approach situations with self-compassion. Every moment is a chance to choose differently and foster more authentic connections. Keep nurturing your Shen spirit with gentleness and understanding. Kind Regards, David

Many times when I am my true self , people around me become so jealous and try there best to either ignore me or to become verbally abusive . Thanks for all life teaching.

@WuWeiWisdom

Жыл бұрын

Hello Narges, Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest and support. Why don't you consider joining our FREE and private Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - Over 7,000 members discuss WWW teachings, answer questions and share experiences: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind regards, David.

@nargesnourshahi5091

Жыл бұрын

Yes I did become member of your Facebook group. But be honest I don’t know how to post on that page 🤔💝🙏🏻

you both have nailed this stuff to a T !!!! best information i have ever seen and im 51 yrs old

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

Thank you Lorraine! We wish you well on your journey :) If you have questions on any of our teachings please let us know or if there's a topic or issue you'd like us to cover in future videos do tell us as this helps us plan our future videos. If you enjoy our video teachings please feel free to subscribe to our KZread Channel (we add new videos every Sunday!) ➜ kzread.info (click the 'notification bell’ when you subscribe and you’ll also get an email notification every time we add a new video). We also run a free Facebook Group where we share daily Wu Wei Wisdom, answer supporter questions and broadcast live Q&A and video teachings - you would be welcome to join the group ➜ facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/ Alex + David x

Thank you ❤ found compassion for my mom and myself, we were both people pleasers. I get it. Thanks again. I love forgiveness and freedom, I feel grateful.

@WuWeiWisdom

Жыл бұрын

Hello Jacqueline, Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest and support. Why don't you consider joining our FREE and private Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - Over 7,500 members discuss WWW teachings, answer questions and share experiences: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind regards, David.

Thanks again, you two. No more people pleasing on first dates, etc.

@WuWeiWisdom

Жыл бұрын

Exactly!

Working in retail years ago I did this and of course was very successful- problem was it took over my life and I started behaving this way all the time.

💚❤ Such wisdom; I love how this video starts: "People's pleasing never works" ❤💚

Thank you so much for your life lessons and esp this video. I am in my 60 and recognise everything you said. I am fet up with people pleasing. I believe its not honest neither to myself nor to the other person. I very much like living in Wu Wei...still very much to learn and your videos are so helpfull!!!!❤

@WuWeiWisdom

2 ай бұрын

Hi @arjaloggers4509, Thank you for sharing your heartfelt thoughts. It's inspiring to hear how you're embracing the path of Wu Wei and recognising the importance of authenticity over people-pleasing. Each step you take toward being true to yourself and your Shen spirit is a step toward harmony and inner peace. Our videos aim to support your journey, and we're delighted they're helpful to you. Remember, it's a continuous journey of learning and growth, and we're here to support you along the way. ❤ Kind Regards, David

I now think I know why my sister was angry, with me after I did as she asked of me, she came to me because I had the skills to accomplish the “task” yet instead of reckoning her ability to know how to get the job done she resented that I accomplished the task assigned to her and the praise that it was done better than what they had expected of her. My sister had feelings of guilt???? I felt good that I had helped her ,yet the joy of a job well done and the expected pleasure I thought she would feel was not the “payoff”. I had to keep asking her what were you trying to accomplish what was your intention in asking me to do this task for you? Before watching your videos I would of believed I deserved her anger. I may not interrupt all your lessons correctly however I’m much more balanced then before I started to watch them ....thankyou very much for making them.

“Never compromise your self worth and self esteem for anything or anyone”

Thank you for this. I have been looking for this material for awhile. I am happy to find you. As this seems to be a fundamental root to assertiveness, not being passive aggressive. Which is another title!! I love how you always relate PP to the inner child. Like the woman that you described, I hear myself too. This is powerful to me that will help me change to work on many personal issues that made me someone to walk all over. I learned that I have to walk the walk and talk the talk. I will use this as an affirmation that I watched you do. It is going to be hard but I give this to myself as a gift!!!

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

Hi Lisa Thanks for watching and commenting. If you'd like to learn more about your Inner Child and how it affects your adult life and emotions, we have a full Inner Child video playlist here: kzread.info/head/PL9NQ_PWX4zICGLRS1b7q1HSJhZRash5qq We also have a video on setting boundaries that you may find helpful: kzread.info/dash/bejne/pKV9uNSEm6SXdJc.html If you have questions on any of our teachings please let us know or if there's a topic or issue you'd like us to cover in future videos do tell us as this helps us plan our future videos. If you enjoy our video teachings please feel free to subscribe to our KZread Channel (we add new videos every Sunday!) ➜ kzread.info (click the 'notification bell’ when you subscribe and you’ll also get an email notification every time we add a new video). We also run a free Facebook Group where we share daily Wu Wei Wisdom, answer supporter questions and broadcast live Q&A and video teachings - you would be welcome to join the group ➜ facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/ Alex + David x

Great topic!

So much of this, very good, life lesson rang so many bells for me. I wish I’d heard this some time ago, things may have been different, in the difficult situation I am currently in. I will Have to watch this again, so much wisdom to absorb to help me, help myself .Thank you both for these wise and helpful videos.

@WuWeiWisdom

11 ай бұрын

Glad it was helpful! Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest. Why don't you consider joining our FREE Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - we answer questions and offer guidance and teachings to our members here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Kind regards, David.

This is a wonderful video

Your teaching is so heavy and spiritual to me ,inner trouble about how I was being taught and fluctuating around the others’ intention and emotion.

Thank you for this video 🙂

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

Thanks for taking the time to watch and comment on our video. We're glad it has helped you! If you have questions on any of our teachings please let us know or if there's a topic or issue you'd like us to cover in future videos do tell us as this helps us plan our future videos. If you enjoy our video teachings please feel free to subscribe to our KZread Channel (we add new videos every Sunday!) ➜ kzread.info (click the 'notification bell’ when you subscribe and you’ll also get an email notification every time we add a new video). We also run a free Facebook Group where we share daily Wu Wei Wisdom, answer supporter questions and broadcast live Q&A and video teachings - you would be welcome to join the group ➜ facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/ Alex + David x

this is what I should have, should hear, but like niddle putting in my heart, I grew up with huge family members, all narcissists, they are extremely toxic, and selfish, I was forced to Please others , otherwise I wouldn't be abused and punished

Thank you. This has helped me Immensely.

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

We're so glad Brenda! x

I don't know the key to success bit the key to failure is trying to please everyone!!!!! Love y'all selves.....

Thank you for these videos!! I have listened to almost all of the talks and you both have helped me so much! I was wondering if you could do a video on how to maintain inner peace.

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Hi Marny Thanks for watching our videos - we REALLY appreciate your support! This Sunday we're publishing a new video on the topic of 'Wu Wei', which is essentially about how to stay in green-light feelings/ in your flow (what you may call 'inner peace'!)... please check it out on Sunday and let us know what you think... 🙂🙂 Alex + David x

Thank You 💕😊

Thank you for helping me understand.

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

💜 with sincere gratitude for your support. x

@runwiththewind3281

5 жыл бұрын

@@WuWeiWisdom your authenticity, sincerity and kindness is silent thunder.

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

@@runwiththewind3281 🙏

Hi david and alex. Can u please do a video on people misinterpreting u? Like if u say no in a very sensitive and polite way but they take it as a signal of war and start judging u. And the more u talk with total authenticity, the more they misinterpret.

@sousousasaful

4 жыл бұрын

This is because they don't feel at ease about you putting a boundary. Don't try to over explain. If they don't like your boundary, it's their problem

Wooooo. This is a big one I confronted this week. Petrified at the dynamics and the fall out, I did it v sensitively, had the conversations after and the outcome has been really positive but phew, exhausting week. ❤

@WuWeiWisdom

Жыл бұрын

Wonderful! Kind regards, David.

I Wonder how my life would be If You were my Parents :) Then again, Thank you For Sharing Your Knowledge! =)

I have people pleased all my life. Thank you for explaining this so clearly! I live with a grumpy person, so had to laugh at that! I've watched several of your videos, you have taught me so much about healing that needy inner child within. She is getting so much happier, when before she was so lonely and sad. Now I know why! What a relief to have these life lessons explained, the pieces and parts I missed growing up and also from living with dysfunctional partners. Thank you!!

I want to know more about compassionate self discipline and how to know when your inner child is trying to avoid doing stuff or I am just being tired to do and it is not avoidance .. how to know that I am not pushing myself hard ..cause I feel burned out sometimes ...wanting to procrastinate

thankyou both🙏❤🌹☮

@WuWeiWisdom

3 жыл бұрын

Hi Maria Richards, thanks for watching! We appreciate your support. You may find our Love and Relationships Video Playlist helpful: kzread.info/head/PL9NQ_PWX4zID3yxrdCbbZFuKHCwgV6qhX Alex + David x

This really speaks to me. I finally see that so many times I picked the fixer upper thinking that when I fix them.. they would love me!

@WuWeiWisdom

3 жыл бұрын

Hi Renee Ternes, thanks for watching! We appreciate your support. Alex + David x

@WuWeiWisdom

3 жыл бұрын

Hi Renee Ternes, thanks for watching! We appreciate your support. You may find our Love and Relationships Video Playlist helpful: kzread.info/head/PL9NQ_PWX4zID3yxrdCbbZFuKHCwgV6qhX Alex + David x

🙏😇Thank you I got relief watching your video

@WuWeiWisdom

Жыл бұрын

You're welcome 😊 Kind regards, David.

David and Alex, at minute 12:30, you mentioned about having an open communication with your partner about how come I seem to be doing more and you are not helping out....that is our story at home. My partner takes it personally, feels bad, gets angry, and tries to justify that you don't work, are a homemaker, and so it is your responsibility. I have been butting my head against this issue for past 30 some years and I can't cope any more. What to do? How to deal with other's anger? I don't want to do things around the house just to keep peace.....because from inside I do resent. And that RLF I have to come to terms with. Love you both for everything that you do. Humble respects to both of you. XOXOXOX

I respect both of you sorry for my displacement this evening. I feel change is upon me. I am going to move on from the position that I'm sitting in. What I mean by that is this. One cannot sit in a pile of s*** and think they're going to smell roses. Moving from the pile speeds up life in a new way I'm not saying this for all people I don't know anybody's position and it is not for me to know. But what I do know is where I said I will move on. Sincerely with love James

i did what you are talking about i now resent i gave my life away to please i am now 76 i am hurting so much i seperated my children and grand children made my husband th e marter as he hid his mean ways and i am feeling hurting i ask my self why i still am having so much resentment i dont even like me i put a bandge on every thing i am alone now will i evrer get over this hurt

Okay very good subject for myself. My thing is I'm okay with being a loner .the problem I'm having is I'll meet someone that doesn't understand that I need my alone time to power up. then when we hang out again it's almost like I have to people please they don't understand or care that I Just needed some time alone🙆 as for myself I have been listening👂 to a lot of your videos and they have put me in touch with the real authentic me and sometimes I find mysel tryin to them how this can help them 🙀they don't want to 👂 it and they start rambling😴 on and on about some crap💩 that I don't want to hear and they don't want you to cut them off or ask questions🙉 that's where the people pleasing come in because sometimes I want to hang out with the Ramblers🐰

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Hi Raven, Thanks for your comments we are pleased that you enjoy our videos and finding them helpful. We read your story but, do not understand why you believe ‘people pleasing’ helps your friends understand that sometimes you like to be alone? You should not have to do this for taking authentic actions and choices. Maybe think about finding the core belief that is motivating your people pleasing in this type of situation.... Alex + David x

You are responsable of your feelings and hapiness

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Yes! A very empowering truth :) Thanks for watching and commenting Mireille... Alex + David x

Thanks alot 🎉 44:28

@WuWeiWisdom

29 күн бұрын

Hi, Thank you so much for your kind comment! I'm delighted to hear that you enjoyed the video. Kind Regards, David

This was powerful. Can you please do a video on managing family or loved ones with mental illness? As I believe growing up around others who are mentally ill can warp perceptions and trigger people pleasing. After 30 years of it, the only choice seems to be to walk away, walk alone, especially since trouble and abuse has boiled up since the people pleaser started to give more self love and assert boundaries. The reactions seem to be envious verbal abuse and oversensitive feelings of rejection. This of course used to play on the people pleasers guilt and fear of isolation/abandonment, whereas now strength has been found and the power to say no is sneered at. In the end, the only solution seems to be to walk away. Otherwise, the negative emotional reverberations last long and disrupt the PPs life, career, own grown up family. Is walking away/cutting out the only choice in the end?

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

Hi Mike, Thanks for sharing your story, I was interested to read it. We will put your future video suggestion on the list. I would also suggest that you meditate on the Wu Wei Wisdom teachings: 'you are the creator of your emotions NOT the victim of them'... and 'you control your mind, your mind does NOT control you'. We discuss this teaching on many of our videos and I think it will help with your background. We have also done a video on setting boundaries which you may find helpful: kzread.info/dash/bejne/pKV9uNSEm6SXdJc.html Why don't you consider joining our FREE Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - we answer questions and offer guidance and teachings to our members here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Thank you for taking the time and trouble for watching and commenting on our videos we appreciate your support. Please subscribe to our KZread channel and don't forget to click the BELL icon. David

@munkami

4 жыл бұрын

@@WuWeiWisdom Thank you, David.

@joharley948

4 жыл бұрын

Hi David, when you say we manage our emotions, they don’t control/manage us - how does this relate to mental health? I too am interested in Mike’s question as I have been surrounded by family with severe mental health for years & think this is where my people pleasing began but if I try to be authentic with these people it triggers their mental health.

I love your videos! I have question, but is not related to this subject. It is about golden thread. What if you don't know what is causing the red light feeling because it's unconscious and complex? Also I have another one. What you think about shadow self like Karl Jung was describing it?

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Hello Mira, Thank you your question. Discovering the root cause of your Red Light feelings IS the reason for doing the Golden Thread Process. We demonstrate the process on many of our videos. Remember, you can't change what you don't understand... so finding the root cause is very important. I think it can add to the confusion when you compare methods and techniques. Therefore I would not want to make an informed comment on Karl Jung's work. But I'm sure there are many groups that could give you more information. Why don't you consider joining our FREE Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - we answer questions and offer guidance and teachings to our members here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Thank you for taking the time and trouble for watching and commenting on our videos we appreciate your support. Please subscribe to our You Tube channel and don't forget to click the BELL icon. David

I think people need some tools, like breathing exercises, EFT, mediation, neurofeedback, EMDR

Hi David, I wanted to ask about the aspect of manipulation in terms of people pleasing. I recognise that as a child I was PP from Fear of retaliation ( bullied and SA) as a way to stay safe, not lose love and be validated. Aware I'm still operating from that place, relationships with men feel frightening as I say yes and agree to something, then feel overwhelmed by another's feelings needs.

@Neptunianist

3 жыл бұрын

I have exactly the same dynamic at work.

So if someone says to you, if you don't do this for me i'm not going to do that for you. This is manipulation. Love come from inside out not outside in

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

Hi Monique, I would say the example you share sounds like a manipulation, and you are correct. Love comes from inside out, not the other way round. David

I was thinking of making a comment, but I'm not sure if people will like it. What do you think? Should I make the comment? Will you please like my comment? Will you promise not to criticize my comment? Oh wait, I forgot what my comment was.

Help me please to understand the difference in people pleasing and doing something thoughtful ..my mother is elderly and lives alone in another country ..every holiday I take my partner and children to stay with my mother for our 2 week holiday..my children and partner, although they love my mother feel quite resentful for having to go to the same place every year.. I want to please my mother and make her happy and see her as I only see her once a year ..however why am I so resentful ..... it's a lovely thing I'm doing seeing my mother once a year but I am resentful as it's my 2 weeks holiday with my family and I want to travel to different places in the world

@WuWeiWisdom

4 жыл бұрын

Hi Katerina, Thanks for your question. In simple terms the difference is: pleasing people is wanting something in return, whereas doing something thoughtful is without any strings or conditions attached. As you will appreciate it would be inappropriate for me to comment on personal issues without full knowledge, history and background. Therefore I can only comment in general terms. I would always suggest you try and spread the decision making and communicate the issues and choices with ALL members of your family, encouraging a group discussion and a open decision concerning whole situation and possible outcomes. Finding the Wu Wei with these type of family matters can be a great challenge 😊 David

@stefaniakonstantinidou981

2 жыл бұрын

Why not spend 1 week with youf mother and 1 week somewhere else with your family

you cant please people,ive dealt with large numbers of the general public,you cant please everyone and never will.i ve gave people stuff and they still bite you in the backside lol.Its only about you,be the change you want to see in the world,.....david i only say no to doing the dishes (joking). Thanks david and alex

@WuWeiWisdom

5 жыл бұрын

Hi Steven, thanks as always for your comments... you will have to teach me that "NO" about the dishes ;-) David